The Best Of The Rational Male – Year 5

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Well another year has come and gone. I generally view the end of August as my year marker for The Rational Male. I didn’t add a page for year 4 since I’m not sure I want to clutter up the top of my blog layout with links pages, but I may yet combine the best of years 4 and 5 into one page.

A lot has happened in this span, I began the Red Pill Monthly talks with Niko Chosky. I still think I sound like a nasally teenager when I hear my voice, but the feedback has been nothing short of amazing on these so I believe we’ll continue with them for the foreseeable future.

Right after my year 4 best-of I did my first liv appearance in Vegas with Christian, Goldmund and Tanner Guzy at The Man in Demand Conference. I’ve discussed doing another one with Christian McQueen and we’re looking into venues for 2017. This was just an overwhelming experience to meet up with my readers in person, do the talk and have dinner at Sinatra’s. This was the first time for me to do an on premise event and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a nervous wreck the night before, but every guy in attendance just impressed me to no end and the whole thing was something I’ll remember for the rest of my life.

I went through the process of having the audio mastered (courtesy of Sam Botta) to make it available via DigiRAMP for anyone to get a hold of now too.

Probably the biggest TRM news of 2016 was the release of the audio book of The Rational Male. It was a long time coming, but I think well worth the wait. I’ve come to believe that a book needs a time to mature into what its overall reception will be. The Rational Male book continues to sell very well and my focus has always been on emphasizing the printed book above all else since I feel that medium is the best to spark discussions and pass along to men who need it at the right time. That said, Sam Botta convinced me that men listen to books more than they read them so I thought the time was right and he’d just gotten back in the saddle so to speak after his debilitation in a hit & run car incident.

The book has exceeded any expectation I ever had for it and I still receive emails and tweets about how it’s changed men’s lives in the best possible way. The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine is also doing far better than I’d hoped if not eclipsing the first book. Sam and I are now in the process of doing the audio for TRMPM and I expect it will go live in early 2017.

The blog traffic continues to grow too.

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As most readers know, I do very little self-promotion for TRM and I only advertise the book on the TRP reddit forum and posting occasional Amazon reviews on Twitter. I always want the the message of this blog and my work to be relayed by the men who read and contribute to it. I’m a believer in the bottom up plan for improving men’s lives and ultimately the social order we find ourselves. I’m glad to see men passing on what they learn here. I’m happy to be able to focus on my ideas and have men spread the word for me.

I’ve done art direction and brand management for over two decades now. It’s what I do for a living so it wouldn’t be a stretch for me to convert TRM into a similar commercial success, but that’s never been my goal. From the outset I wanted to just do what I do and talk about the ideas I’ve come to or the dots I’ve connected. That isn’t to say I don’t appreciate making a little money from it, but I’ll never compromise my message to sell more books or start a Patreon site.

I’ve had guys tell me I should quit my day job and write full time, but I’ve never really needed to be an author for my livelihood. I do quite well for myself and not being beholden to being an official author allows me the freedom to do what I do without the concern of having to write ‘for’ anyone. I know there are guys whose schtick is to treat their writing like a product and they tell you to write for what your audience wants to read, but I think this inherently compromises the authenticity of the real message.

My goal isn’t to sell books, it’s to genuinely change men’s lives for the better with the tools and truths I present in my work. The Rational Male isn’t a ‘product’ for salesmen to sell, it’s a collection of ideas that, really, we’re all responsible for authorship of. Ideas are a hard thing to suppress, and they last far longer than the men who conceived them.

Honestly, when I started this blog back in 2011 I never imagined it would grow into what it’s become today. I have some plans now to do a site redesign. I’ve never really focused on the look of the blog, I just poured myself into its content, but I think after 5 years I’ll freshen the look up soon. I’m also in the middle of the first round of edits for my third book, the working title being The Rational Male, The Red Pill. That may change, but the primary focus will be on defining what the Red Pill is from an intersexual dynamics perspective. As a matter of policy I generally refrain from being too prescriptive for individual men to apply their Red Pill awareness, but in the new book I’ll break this rule and provide some generally applicable ways to live in a Red Pill paradigm.

Red Pill parenting and family interactions in a feminine-primary social order will feature prominently. Yes, it will include selections from the blog again, but with each I’ve added what I believe are general solutions to Red Pill problems, plus more new content.

Well, that’s it. I continue to be humbled by the response and reception of The Rational Male and I want to extend my true gratitude for everyone’s input, participation, reading my ideas and helping me do what I do – even the critics and detractors make me a better Red Pill author. So here’s what I thought represents the best posts from year 5.

Let me know what your favorites were in the comments and let me know how TRM has helped you as well.

 

With much gratitude,

Rollo Tomassi

 

The Rational Male Audio Book

Interviews

Red Pill Monthly

The Red Pill Monthly

The Red Pill Monthly

A Man in Demand Radio – Talk 3

The Red Pill Monthly – Frame

The Feminine Imperative

Solipsism I

Solipsism II

Damaged Goods

Good Girls, Bad Girls

Mansplaining

Sugar Babies

Losing My Religion

Parenting

The Red Pill Parent

Hypergamy Knows Best

Red Pill Parenting – Part I

Red Pill Parenting – Part II

Neofemininity

Red Pill / Game

Christian Dread

Ovulation & Dread

The Purple Pill

Don’t Hate the Beta

The Red Pill Balance

The Pareto Principle

The Cardinal Rule of Sexual Strategies

Positive Masculinity

Tribes

Hypergamy

Open Cuckoldry

Open Relationships

Evolving Hypergamy

Plan B

Late Life Hypergamy

Social

Storytelling

Empathy 2016

The War Brides of Europe

The Warrior Princess

Gamer Girls

Fempowerment

Ghosts in the Machine

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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Culum Struan
Culum Struan
5 years ago

Wow, guys. I get busy for a while and I come back to a comment section that has exploded with the Marriage Wars. I’m still at least a page behind the latest but it still seems to me that both “sides” are right. YaReally (and Trent Lane, Anonymous Reader et al) IS right that there are structural changes happening that make marriage less attractive – not just the legal stuff (it may not be Doom and Woe as much as it is painted but it is pretty clear that men get a worse deal from divorce legally on average) but… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@ Culum Welcome back. I don’t have an issue with YaReally’s stance on the ” get it without a legal contract ” thing. I think he thinks that’s what I’m saying but it’s not. Not even close. What I take issue with is 1) this notion that marriage is a sure fire death sentence, and it’s a no brainer to figure this out. 2) that ” Legal Noose ” around your neck deal. It is only a legal noose if a man does not bother to understand what he’s doing, and what the legal ramifications MIGHT be, and if he… Read more »

scray
scray
5 years ago

@culum At some point a lot of men do get tired of banging lots of chicks and want one chick they get along with – that’s not beta, it’s alpha to be your MPO and choose that (and I’m not even getting into the kids thing because EVERYONE agrees on that). It’s not failure to choose to be monogamous. ehhhh based on what I’ve seen here and my experience and modern reality.. …yeeeaaah it is… you can HAVE that one chick you get along with AND bang other chicks. That’s the part that isn’t “mutually exclusive.” There is no such… Read more »

scray
scray
5 years ago

literally the only arguments in favor of monogamous marriage are —>

‘if you’re some kind of level 99999 wizard of alpha game you can maybe have this ONE WOMAN who will GET OLD not RAPE YOU in court and ABANDON you’

vs

‘if you’re decent with game, you can have your own harem of chicks and a chick that you’re more serious with and no legal consequences for going your own way or if she strays or if you stray’

liiiike….

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Blax That nfl bit was great. A big part of the problem the never marry guys seem to be having is they do not understand the difference between risk, benefits/features, price and value. A list of benefits and features does not equal value. Value does not equal price or cost. You can’t put value in a CBA. Value is the main driver though and always a unique proposition. Spend your time understanding where the value is. I once sold a nine figure contract to a Fortune 500 company because the value to an exec VP was his exerting more influence… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Culum Struan “What I don’t understand is why nobody seems to accept that the two things are Not Exclusive (I think YaReally has alluded to it though).” Yup. This has been my point since the start and I’ve said repeatedly that yes, being alpha IS great, that IS what keeps attraction going, I 100% agree. There’s just no reason to legally sign a contract and/or promise monogamy and make staying alpha harder to accomplish. But that’s getting called being a pussy, risk-avoidance, and a bunch of other FI-based male disposibility shaming tactics etc etc lol That’s why I keep saying… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@scray “literally the only arguments in favor of monogamous marriage are —> ‘if you’re some kind of level 99999 wizard of alpha game you can maybe have this ONE WOMAN who will GET OLD not RAPE YOU in court and ABANDON you’” That’s not even a benefit, that’s just an “it’s not impossible”. And it’s true, it’s not impossible. But what’s the point of risking that when you can ALSO have ONE WOMAN who will GET OLD not RAPE YOU in court and ABANDON you if you just don’t sign a legal contract that gives her that ability? Like “you… Read more »

MeadLarkLemon
MeadLarkLemon
5 years ago

@Andy: “Maybe there’s a chance that it isn’t just women than have changed since the 80s. There’s a clear divide based on generation here and it holds true despite all sorts of different life circumstances and experiences. Maybe it’s the fact that us younger guys simply WANT different things.” As an older dude, when I was in high school/college in the 90s “spinning plates” wasn’t really A THING. Maybe guys wanted to do it but didn’t know they COULD, probably they would have wanted it if they knew it was a possibility. But most girls that weren’t total skanks wouldn’t… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “I will be the first to admit that I take parenting maybe just a tad too seriously, but I have seen firsthand. how things can go very wrong when parenting skills lack.” EVERYONE agrees that you should be a good parent. NO ONE is advocating for being a shitty parent or abandoning your kids or not living with your girlfriend when you have kids together etc. NO ONE. NOOOOOO ONE. NO ONE IS PROMOTING THE GHETTO LIFESTYLE OF ABSENTEE FATHERISM AND KNOCKING UP 50 WOMEN AND AVOIDING RAISING THEM. We’re specifically looking for better ways to improve the odds… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@un ” think the biggest problem I have with the old guy advice here comes down to something we all have to acknowledge as true: If (as YaReally claims and I agree) even the best of the younger women have become far worse to deal with in commitment, then it’s impossible to meet a guy who’s had a long enough marriage to one of them to know what works. It means that no matter what you guys tell us works with the older generation you’re married to, we have to take that with a huge grain of salt. Perhaps an… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sentient “So if you grew up in a dysfunctional broken family what is the value to you in providing a loving stable unbroken family for the little you?” You can do this without a legal marriage contract or promising monogamy. There is no evidence to support that legal marriage or promising monogamy in 2016 increases your odds of the woman “loving” you and not straying. As Rollo has talked about numerous times you cannot negotiate desire and a legal contract and promising commitment/monogamy is just a buffer guys use to try to force their girl to not stray and it… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

My keyboard…. I meant @ Sun.

Pesky capital ” S”.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “I get that because things have shifted so dramatically in the past 10-15 years, that it is very difficult to figure it all out and proceed. But it’s my belief ( and this is a point of disagreement ) that there are workarounds that can be helpful when guys have more understanding of relationships, and not just how to talk a chick out of her panties.” For what benefit? What benefit is there to “figuring it out and proceeding” and finding these workarounds when EVERYTHING you get from doing everything you did minus the legal contract, can be gotten… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

I don’t equate legal marriage with love.

I equate legal marriage with legal marriage.

The interpretation of my words is getting twisted.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “I will always push for self improvement and understanding. I would be derelict if I did not.” NO ONE HAS EVER RECOMMENDED GUYS DON’T SELF-IMPROVE AND UNDERSTAND RELATIONSHIP DYNAMICS. This goes back to what Culum Struan said: “IN OTHER WORDS, YOUR CONDUCT AND CHARACTER AND ABILITY TO ALPHA UP MATTER WAY, WAY MORE THAN THE EXTERNAL ENVIRONMENT AND CULTURE” “What I don’t understand is why nobody seems to accept that the two things are Not Exclusive (I think YaReally has alluded to it though).” How can you STILL not understand this after 6 pages of me saying it over… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

” Why is what I’m asking so hard to understand?”

It’s not hard to understand at all.

Don’t get married.

See how simple it is?

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Yareally

Go back and read what i just wrote. The words are ascribed common meanings. It is not a trick.

You cant have a Wife without being married… If what you value is a Wife.

hank holiday
hank holiday
5 years ago

@yareally @culum @forge @scray @you fags know who you are okay okay this is cool gonna a spend a few days studying this shit, go out later this week. but a lot of stuff with the todd/julien bit has been clicking with me. so gonna watch a bunch of rsd shit for the next few days, then roll it all into my daygame shit just need to solidify that. . .i feel like my actual date skills are solid enough to fuck 5-6 espicially and 7s even. just need to push more. could have done that last time with asian.… Read more »

hank holiday
hank holiday
5 years ago

and just my general socializing and jester shit has improved substantially. sold a shit ton off stuff just from showing up at my work off the clock earlier today lol. like this game shit helps you out SO MUCH with all other areas of your life. it isn’t just chicks

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago
Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

This weekend I acquired a houseguest for the next 6 days of so. I mentioned that her name is Andy, but it’s spelled Andi. Andi is a 5’10” hb8. I spoke with her at length a few time yesterday. What I found out was this: She’s 22 years old. She is actually a model. A ” real ” model ( GQ, Playboy, Esquire, Vicky’s Secret – not the big time chicks though, catalogue stuff, and a few more.) She’s been modeling for 3 years. She works out 5 days a week. She asked if she could use my equipment, and… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

Re: Promising monogamy.

As I’ve said, men are individuals. I am really into demonstrating in place of explicating. I don’t really do a lot of conversation about stuff in relationships unless it is absolutely called for. I definitely don’t believe in verbally making promises to women.

I have never ” asked ” a woman to marry. I have said ” we are getting married “. No down on one knee or anything.

So ” promising ” is not the way I go about life. Actions speak, and all that jazz.

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

From Frame ( one of my absolute favorites ) in 2011. “…Unfortunately, you and I are not this Man, he’s a feminine idealization. However it’s important to understand how hypergamy plays into establishing frame. The Man who impassively accepts women’s hypergamous natures has a much easier time establishing frame from the outset. You or I may not be that be that famous guy with an automatic, overt frame control, but we can be by order of degrees depending upon our personal conditions and the conditions of the women with whom we choose to associate. The default pedestalization of women that… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“There is no evidence to support that legal marriage or promising monogamy in 2016 increases your odds of the woman “loving” you and not straying.” Agree. False premise when you are conflating marriage and monogamy=loving and not straying. No idiot in the manosphere would ever conflate the two. False strategy: promising monogamy Poor strategy without contingencies and legal strategy: Getting married henceforth. “As Rollo has talked about numerous times you cannot negotiate desire and a legal contract and promising commitment/monogamy is just a buffer guys use to try to force their girl to not stray and it does not work… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

@ Blaximus Make sure you get a hold of Andi’s fiance when you can and make sure he is informed. And that marriage will never work and he will face worse fates than active combat. Marriage in this discussion thread: red herring. Don’t get married. Consider locking down a girl like Andi with or without marriage. Yep that’s paradoxical. She only has four billion other options. Yep I’d tell my son to follow his instincts. Even though one can interpret Rollo any way they want to make their logical argument (seems you are well past the “bible-like” stage of writing… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

I had to think about the premise that it’s much harder to induce dread after marriage. I’ve never thought about it before. After thinking about it, I guess it is true under certain circumstances. Again, men are individuals. Passive dread. I lov… er..I like that shit. Part of an FR that I never wrote 2 months ago because I was too busy reading Hank’s FR’s. Lol. GO HANK!!!!! Went to an outlet with wifey to find curtains. Because I am an artist at heart, I actually enjoy checking out the accoutrements for the home. Wifey likes to get my opinion… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@SJF “And that marriage will never work” I’ve never said it will never work. You guys can’t actually argue my real points, as you’ve shown over 6 pages by not being able to answer what benefit there is for a man in 2016 to legally marry or promise monogamy to a woman in 2016 in 2016 culture that he can’t get without those things, so you’re just doubling-down on pretending my position is “IT’S IMPOSSIBLE TO MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK AND GUARANTEED TO FAIL” because you CAN argue THAT position, which is why it’s NOT my position because it’s a… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@ SJF ” Hypothetic question: Andi’s fiance comes home and says: you can raise my babies but I’m certainly not getting married to you, ever. What does Andi doe for the next two years after he is stateside? Can Andi’s fiance afford to next her if she says no deal? Should he not get married no how no way, if he is informed and well read about the combat risks of marriage?” Well I just met her so it’s hard to say for sure, but my initial reading on her is that she wouldn’t accept that, because she is conditioned… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “I can watch what she does and compare it with what she says as the week goes on and get a better handle on it.” Run Boyfriend Destroyers on her and try to fuck her. “But certainly the Marine could next her. It doesn’t sound like she would go for the ” have my babies, no marriage deal “…but I will ask her,lol.” Also run BFDs and try to fuck her again after she’s been married for a couple years and out of the NRE stage and he’s away for Army stuff. Also try attracting her and fucking her… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “But I have no idea where the Marine’s head is at. He proposed, got the ring and set he date.” Odds are it’s the same as any other military dude: lock a girl down with the promise of commitment before you go away hoping that she won’t stray on you. And there’s a reason he probably knows who Jody is. And that’ll probably be okay (because I’ve never said marriage is impossible), though he’s handicapping himself and has to hope that no one purposely interferes. And “people purposely interfering” is what we’ve been talking about since the start, that’s… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@ YaReally Bro, you know I hate it when we argue. I’ve argued with you more these past few days that I’ve ever argued in either marriage. Maybe WE should get married so we can get along better…. Lololololol… ” You could have created the exact same level of dread (MORE, even, since it would be easier for you to leave) by flirting with that girl in front of your non-legally-married wife just like you did, minus the legal contract that gives you nothing you couldn’t get without it.” I don’t really disagree with the basic premise here, but my… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus
Even just do the bare minimum and make out with her. You have all week, laser eye-contact, that deep Blaximus sexy voice they all love, your sexy manly frame etc, see if you can get her to make out by the end of her stay. That’ll give us an idea of how much her engagement means to her.

But don’t half-ass it, really turn on the Blax charm. You don’t have to fuck her, it’s just a harmless little kiss. That’ll tell you a lot more than surveying her.

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“I had to think about the premise that it’s much harder to induce dread after marriage. I’ve never thought about it before. After thinking about it, I guess it is true under certain circumstances. Again, men are individuals.” You had to think about it because you are a natural at inducing dread. The key to any LTR you want to keep desire in. Establish frame, don’t lose it and keep Dread alive. (Do it for the children, and all) You established frame and never lost it. Which is the premise of Frame in LTR. As Rollo explains in the Iron… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus Plus because your wife would be okay with it since you didn’t promise monogamy and you don’t have a noose around your neck or anything, even if you get caught it shouldn’t matter. You could probably tell her flat out that you want to run a little experiment to try to kiss this chick and it won’t matter ’cause you have hand in the relationship and legal marriage doesn’t restrict you. You wanna field test this stuff right? YOU know a little kiss won’t mean anything to you or affect your feelings for your wife, and it’ll get you… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@ YaReally

Lol. I have zero intentions of inviting someone into my home and then try to kiss/fuck them. That’s not really cool. At least for me.

I ask that my guest make themselves comfortable and relax and feel at home.

Plus, I am not attracted to her like that. She’s young. I’m older than her dad.

I’ve stated before many times, I’m not all that attracted to really young chicks. Not even model ones. That’s just me, no hate.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “Lol. I have zero intentions of inviting someone into my home and then try to kiss/fuck them. That’s not really cool. At least for me.” But this is a chance to field test this stuff. You’re going to pass up the perfect opportunity to try the things we’re all doing infield and seeing other guys do infield and reporting on, and the going to tell me you don’t believe anything I say or anything’s changed etc? I mean, okay. But remember that’s your decision not to field test. This is why the opinion of guys who aren’t field testing… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@ YaReally

” I mean, okay. But remember that’s your decision not to field test. This is why the opinion of guys who aren’t field testing has to take second place to the opinion of guys who ARE, if they contradict.

Field is king.”

Lmao. You fucking ball-buster.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus I’m not even actually expecting you to field test it, I know you won’t, but I’m making the point that WE are reporting changes infield based on DOING this stuff and seeing what happens and seeing other guys do this stuff (good and bad, orbiters and players) and seeing what happens and that’s what we’re reporting and that’s why the guys who are going out all generally get what I’m saying while the OMGs aren’t…you have experience and it’s awesome and we can get some useful things from it, and everyone agrees you should self-improve and be alpha and… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Man

Still going… despite all the pronouncements of simple logic. You would think that a sperg could figure out by now to look past the boogeyman and see what the (using a generous but inaccurate 50p All marriages end in divorce statistic) half of successful marriages are doing that work and obviate the mental masturbation around reinventing those very same things for the guys who are unfazed by the lack of negative consequences because they will mever face them…

Study failure and study success… learn to recognize patterns.

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Yareally

Your fake hypothetical to Blax is still false though because Andi isnt married.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sentient “successful marriages are doing that work and obviate the mental masturbation around reinventing those very same things for the guys who are unfazed by the lack of negative consequences because they will mever face them…” What benefit is there to even risk facing them VS not facing them at all and getting the exact same things out of the relationship? “Your fake hypothetical to Blax is still false though because Andi isnt married.” He can try fucking some married chicks next but this is a nice easy lay-up to show how a <25yo 8+/10 girl who might SEEM like… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Simple logic

YaReally needs field tests. Risk aversion and all. His values. Anti-civilization

Blax lacks motive (Damn right). Because of fidelity to his wife and children. His principles. His civilization.

How the hell did that happen?

Logic, my ass. It’s values all the way down.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@SJF “YaReally needs field tests. Risk aversion and all. His values. Anti-civilization” Ya I hear that “science” stuff likes field tests too. BUNCHA RISK AVERSE ROCKET SCIENTISTS lol “Why don’t you just TRUST ME on how to build a million dollar rocket to fly to the moon risking everyone’s life, I haven’t done it myself but I built a bottle rocket in high school!” You idiot SCIENTISTS, wanting to TEST things lololol Do you even get how silly that sounds? You know who ELSE doesn’t approve of men field testing things to see if they’re being lied to by people… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“….this is a nice easy lay-up to show how a <25yo 8+/10 girl who might SEEM like she gives a shit about marriage, in 2016, might NOT place quite the same value on it that Blaximus' wife did back in the day." After vetting and engaging in an LTR with a woman who holds up her end of the bargain over the years. It is on the man to have value, and not become betatized after not being a beta in the first place. Your premise has not been field tested by you (sure the guys you have met over… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@ SJF Lol on the decorating stuff. I surrendered the kitchen and the one 1st floor bathroom and sure enough the signs appeared. The ” life is good ” one is in the bathroom. Lol. I usually hang my own artwork throughout the house, and I do intricate silk floral arrangements too. I’m not gay, really, I like creating stuff. Quick story – A few years ago, the local cops were pursuing some felon. The crook was jumping fences in backyards, evading the cops. The cops rand my doorbell, and asked if they could have access to my backyard to… Read more »

redlight
redlight
5 years ago

@yareally

“That’s fine, but he’s choosing NOT to field test what we’re saying. That’s my point. We and PUAs and the guys on TRP etc are field testing these things and he’s not.”

What PUAs are “field testing” raising children full-time? TRP is anti-marriage, don’t get her pregnant.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Rollo Tomassi “@YaReally, for as much as you write here I’m getting the sneaking suspicion that you use dictation software to “write” your comments.” I don’t, I just type fast as fuck because before I started sarging I was holed away like a hermit living online so I learned to type fast lol But in what way would it matter if I was using dictation software and why would “write” be in quotes lol “That said, I’m going to drop a new post here shortly, but before I do I’ll let you know that I have been following this thread… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“Do you even get how silly that sounds?” Yes I do. But last time I checked they actually did land on the moon, that despite all odds. I remember in 1969. The astronauts actually weren’t risk averse, neither was the nation. Of course a few astronauts did die after that. Was that silly? Fucking Yes it was. So was all other initiatives in the history of men. Was it fucking adventurous, and a dopamine inducing high? Hell yes. Did the nation come to it’s senses and stop doing that shit? Risk aversion will get you less upside. Optionality and Stoicism… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@SJF “Your premise has not been field tested by you (sure the guys you have met over the years couldn’t get their woman do it): that a woman can’t hold up her end of the deal. Not my experience (or Blax, Sentient, or Rollo).” My point is those men were taking an unneccesary risk. So are you guys. You guys made it work and that’s great, but there’s no reason for men in 2016 to take that same risk when they can have the exact same benefits without the risk. The argument isn’t that it CAN’T work, it’s why should… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@redlight “What PUAs are “field testing” raising children full-time? TRP is anti-marriage, don’t get her pregnant.” What married guys are “field testing” raising children without a legal contract signed while staying in the relationship and loving her and raising the kids with good healthy values and influence (VS the ghetto example)? Why not get her pregnant and then just decide to stay with her long-term and be a father and raise those kids instead of legally signing a paper that risks half your assets and then doing the exact same thing but under threat of a noose? Why is your… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@SJF “Yes I do. But last time I checked they actually did land on the moon, that despite all odds.” And have they stopped experimenting since the 70s? They just said “okay we landed once and nothing will change since then, so we can fire all our scientists and just keep building that same rocket in 2016 and following the exact same procedure, no room for improvement or better calculations at all!” “Was it fucking adventurous, and a dopamine inducing high? Hell yes. Did the nation come to it’s senses and stop doing that shit?” Then your argument for legally… Read more »

redlight
redlight
5 years ago

@yareally

hard to move goalposts when everybody’s watching

PUAs lecturing on how to have a relationship with the mother of your kids and how to raise kids full time is keyboard jockeying, until they get around to field testing it

I look forward to Rollo’s Q&A in MarriedRedPill, there’s the frontline of this battle, not the safety of your clubs

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

A story about abundance mentality and not fucking. Tl/dr – the one where I meet another stripper and do not bang… Ps many typos on mobil device… So out on the road. In a big city. Early afternoon 3pm on a Sunday. Go by one of my favourite bars. Old school. Dark mello expensive local… no tvs… get in amd just me and two late fifties dudes. Perfect. Order drink. Relax. On the way over pass some 20s girls in crazy hats. Ask them whats up with the hats? They say they are leaving a function. Ok. About 10 minutes… Read more »

A Wise Man
5 years ago

There’s something important about the nature of the sexes that needs to be said that hasn’t been discussed much. It is often said that a woman’s hypergamous instinct makes her untrustworthy. While this is in fact true, it doesn’t get to the core of matter. First, it’s important to understand that men are also hypergamous. What else ought one call it when a man leaves his wife of twenty years for a new twenty something girlfriend? Yes there are differences between men and women in this regard, but in both instances they are looking for the next best thing. Herein… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@redlight “PUAs lecturing on how to have a relationship with the mother of your kids and how to raise kids full time is keyboard jockeying, until they get around to field testing it” We’re not saying how TO, we’re just pointing out that the current system is VERY flawed and pointing out that now that as a community we understand attraction etc better than when the old system was invented, there may be new avenues worth discussing for men of this generation and the next generations who want to successfully raise a kid in a loving 2-parent household minus the… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sentient Do you feel like that little field report you just had on your own time has negatively affected your kids? @Rollo Do you feel like that field report Sentient just wrote has negatively affected his ability to be a father to his kids? You can do everything you’ve done, exactly how you’ve done it, minus agreeing to monogamy or signing a legal contract. You can be exactly the same involved father you are now, it’s entirely up to YOU to decide how much time/energy you put into side-poon but the point is that you have that option and aren’t… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Rollo And if it comes down to “men who don’t sign a legal contract or promise monogamy will just abandon their kids and pop into the house once a month because they’re off banging all their side-poon and won’t be loving and caring or spend time with their family or wife and we’ll turn into a ghetto culture where every man has 6 baby mamas preggers and is avoiding raising any of the kids”, then that’s VERY close to just flat out saying “men need to be controlled/forced into “doing the right thing”” And as disillusioned as I am right… Read more »

MeadowLarkLemon
MeadowLarkLemon
5 years ago

@Rollo –

If anybody saw the “My dream for my daughter is to become a single mom” article you linked and thought, “Wow, can’t get anymore blatant than that…”, try this one:

“Should you sell your engagement ring after your divorce? (Yes, and here’s how)”

http://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/sell-engagement-ring-divorce-get-divorce/

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

These guys are glossing over your writing about love and the FI convincing men to self-sacrifice for no reward and your own writing has talked about how you can’t negotiate desire and marriage being a buffer open hypergamy etc, BUT as a married dude I know you probably WANT to side with them too. you can NOT verbalize monogamy but still BE monogamous to her, just like Blaximus and SJF are. There you go again with the no reward and the mythical large sacrifice. I claim big upside, low downside. In 2016, it still is a universal principle to do… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@SJF “But commitment to the mother of your children is much more risky that PUA style nexting.” You can commit to the mother of your children without signing a legal contract or verbally promising it (just like you and Blaximus didn’t verbally promise it). Men don’t need to put a noose around their neck to “behave”. They can just CHOOSE to behave and we can teach them and guide them. If the belief is that men will all revert to ghetto culture if we give them too much freedom then, I mean, why not just call this the purple pill… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

If you were to remove the ” ghetto ” connotation from the example I gave a few pages back, what you would uncover is a real, perfect field test of widespread, non-monogamous, marriage absent behavior fostered in isolation over at least 3 decades. It eventually devolved. It turned into something very ugly with generational consequences. Walk up to any 20 year old male raised in this environment, and he will have an attitude that will make my brother YaReally proud. They avoid the legal noose absolutely. To a man, everyone of them will profess to being great and wonderful father’s… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Rollo Another way to put the fathering thing: Say you were to fuck one of your bottle models. Every time you go do these events, during downtime in them where you’re just managing the girls, say you got a blowjob from one one of them. Each time you went to do an event, during it you got some head. In what way would that affect your daughter or your ability to be a good strong father who imparts red pill wisdom into your kids? Are you going to purposely knock that bottle model up? Are you going to bring her… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

Lol. See field test above.

redlight
redlight
5 years ago

The reason I have an aversion to PUAs giving advice on areas they haven’t extensively field tested is that when they exit the PUA lifestyle they often make less than optimal choices (or perhaps they were testing these choices, and after they tried them 3 times they would write them up). Two examples: The guy had a four digit n count, relentless at scoring new pussy. Haven’t seen him in a year, pull up at a self-serve, he’s there with a mini-van w/ car seat. He explains, he’s hooked up with a woman with three kids, says he’s loving it.… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “If you were to remove the ” ghetto ” connotation from the example I gave a few pages back, what you would uncover is a real, perfect field test of widespread, non-monogamous, marriage absent behavior fostered in isolation over at least 3 decades.” No, what you’d uncover is a perfect field test of what happens when we don’t give guys a PLAN and TEACH THEM how to do that in a productive way. What you have is men with zero guidance and no structured plan. Your argument is exactly the same as saying “what do we see when guys… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus Because if you’re saying that men NEED to get legally contracted into marriage to NOT be like the ghetto crowd, then you’re implying that men need to be controlled and have chains on them to act properly. Like they aren’t inherently capable of “doing the right thing” by their own decision. Do you see how that’s the same argument as the Prager U guy is making in that video, about how a man who has a legal noose will HAVE to have more ambition to avoid getting raped/jailed? And do you understand how that’s FI-based thinking? That men have… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@redlight “when they exit the PUA lifestyle they often make less than optimal choices” Because no one has a guide for AFTER the lifestyle, just like no one can tell Sun Wukong or Softek or Scribblerg how to have kids again without signing the legal noose. That’s my point. The only guide is a very broken system of marriage that’s stacked against them and doesn’t mean fuck all to the modern girls they’re trying to settle with. That’s why I’m surprised ANYONE is against this. “This makes no sense to me, he could have married a 9 and had his… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “Lol. See field test above.” Then is it your belief that if Rollo got a blowjob from a bottle model while he was running an event, Sentient fucked a stripper on his business trip, and you fucked your houseguest, you would all become like the ghetto culture and abandon your families? I don’t think so, so your ghetto analogy has no relevance. That shit is an entirely different problem, which Anonymous Reader alluded to (sarcastically) before about the type of guys in the ghetto and their mindsets and income and training VS the average guy like Softek or Scribblerg… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

I’m not with the FI.

I’m just reporting what I’ve actually seen in the field over 3 decades.

I did not say marriage would save these people.

I did say that the attitude of avoiding legality combined with reckless disregard for the actual, real, long term effects is having detrimental results long term. Observable detrimental effects.

If we say people fucked up marriage by their actions/FI/media influence, what makes a structured plan of non monogamous immune to the same so called perversion?

I seent it already. Lol.

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

Forget about ” ghetto ” for a minute. Look at the meat of my argument.

Men are men. Most react the same if put in the same environment over a long period of time.

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Part 2. So I meander down to the endnof the bar. There are no stools here more of a waitstaff pickup area. But large so plenty of room for them to come and go. Order a drink. The girl is young, long black hair and a very pretty face. 8 face. She is wearing a long sleeve drapy cardigan over a tank top and leggings. Slim athletic body. She is 24. She is short though like 5 ‘ 2″ so I would rate her 7.5 overall. She is half asian (mom) and half italian. I relax with my drink and… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “I did say that the attitude of avoiding legality combined with reckless disregard for the actual, real, long term effects is having detrimental results long term. Observable detrimental effects.” Right. That’s why I want to remove the reckless disregard part and help build a structural framework that men can use instead of “winging it” which leads to the ghetto culture. “If we say people fucked up marriage by their actions/FI/media influence, what makes a structured plan of non monogamous immune to the same so called perversion?” It’s not immune, but it has significantly less risk for the man for… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Rollo @Blaximus @Sentient “She says come on. I say go ahead maybe I will meet you.” If Sentient had gone with her and went back to his hotel room (I assume he’s travelling, only skimmed the FR) with her instead of alone, in what way would that at ALL affect his ability to be a good father to his kids? In what way would that affect his stable loving 2-parent household? Do you think so little of him that he would just rawdog her and get her pregnant then abandon his family for her so he should be restrained from… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Yareallly at 840…

You are slowly getting there… you realize that youcan have everything you want WITH marriage? Because it is also always about you.

The coin is the same on both sides. Who you are is the common element.

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

It’s THE LONG PERIOD OF TIME that’s escaping you.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sentient “You are slowly getting there… you realize that youcan have everything you want WITH marriage? Because it is also always about you.” Along with a shitload of risks to your finances and future. So why not just NOT legally sign up for those risks and have the same thing? @Blaximus “It’s THE LONG PERIOD OF TIME that’s escaping you.” The long period of time of men with no guidance. Do you think they were TAUGHT to abandon their kids and rawdog a bunch of randoms? Do you see a difference between that and teaching them how to stay with… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus And even then, so ARE you agreeing that men need to be controlled and threatened with loss of assets etc to avoid becoming like the ghetto dudes on a long timeline? Like, do you see how that’s recommending that men have LESS freedom and be restricted “for their own good” and how that’s the exact same reasoning the FI uses in that Prager U video? “You don’t know what’s best for you and you’re incapable of making good decisions on a long enough timeline, so do what we say and embrace the thread of massive negative consequences so that… Read more »

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
5 years ago

You are slowly getting there… you realize that youcan have everything you want WITH marriage?

OR… you could have it without the legal risk.

comment image

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Sun

I thought you could work out that if you WANT a capital W i f e you HAVE to get married…. ? please tell me I am not wrong. And the difference between benefits and value?

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sun Wukong
“OR… you could have it without the legal risk.”

I just don’t understand how “you can have a cup of coffee, or you can have the same cup of coffee with a 50% chance of being punched in the face” are equivalent to them lol This seems like such a simple thing, I legitimately don’t understand how that simple obvious choice is being argued against.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sentient
“I thought you could work out that if you WANT a capital W i f e you HAVE to get married…. ? please tell me I am not wrong. And the difference between benefits and value?”

I can call any girl at the bar my wife if I want. It’s just a label.

Benefits: things you get that improve your life that you couldn’t get without the thing you have to do to get them.

Value: no one is saying women/LTRs/parenting/etc doesn’t have value. Just that getting that value doesn’t require legal marriage or promising monogamy.

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
5 years ago

@Blax Feminists clearly stated that the result from the ghettos is exactly what they want. Go back and look. That is actually their utopia, hence the reason Social Justice Warriors have embraced Thug Lives Matter. They’ve got the legal and social structures in place to have it, and it’s happening to the rest of society. We can’t change that. I think what we’re looking for is how to have something the individual male chooses to shit on that social structure and the shit show that traditional marriage has become. Something without one-sided legal risk but also without the abandonment of… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Because you refuse to see that coffee is not brown liquid. And John Mayer is not merely a guy with musical training.

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

There you go another step closer… but Wife is not just a label if you actually VALUE what Wife is. Wife is not equal to female.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sun Wukong “I think what we’re looking for is how to have something the individual male chooses to shit on that social structure and the shit show that traditional marriage has become. Something without one-sided legal risk but also without the abandonment of children by fathers for guys that want their kids to succeed. Society won’t provide us with laws to do it, so we need a structure for clued up men that SHOULD be reproducing to choose.” This. It goes without saying that I’m talking about a red pill guide to this, for the men who seek the red… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

Remove ghet… oh, never mind.

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus
“Remove ghet… oh, never mind.”

Before marriage was turned into a legal contract, were we all running around like the “men will be men” disaster you envision? Did kfg’s great grandparents turn into that culture, or did they stay together even without signing a legal contract forcing them to and risking the man’s assets while the woman is influenced by society to bail and take them?

Or did we do just fine and men were raised by their fathers and families stayed together just fine without state-sactioned legal threads dangling over their head? Because they had proper guidance.

parisi91
5 years ago
Reply to  YaReally

@Yareally

All the retards that can’t figure it out should think about it like this: imagine if every time one of your exes was pissed and/or wanted to leave she took half of your shit and was entitled to more every month

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus Again I’m not advocating for absentee fatherism and knocking a dozen girls up rawdogging it and neglecting your family. You can stay with the same girl and not touch another girl in your LIFE, without signing a legal contract or promising monogamy. If you think men are incapable of having self-restraint/willpower and will guaranteed revert to the ghetto style culture, then that’s implying that men need to be restrained and threatened and chained for their own good. Which is what the FI pushes and why they hate MGTOWS and the red pill and PUAs etc, because we’re proving that… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Yareally

Do you realize that long ago if you fucked another guys wife your wife would not divorce rape you but your girl’s guy could legally kill you?

That there were numerous societal constraints to temper behavior besides divorce raping?

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sentient
And women were also similarly restrained.

Women no long have restraints, and in fact have the opposite: encouragement and cash & prizes to bail.

But you want men to stay restrained while women are not.

That’s a lop-sided contract if I’ve ever heard of one.

And what’s the FI’s goal? Maximum restraint on male sexuality with minimum restraint on female sexuality.

stringerbell
stringerbell
5 years ago

@yareally, i posted a FR a couple pages back that I’d appreciate your comments on…hoping it doesn’t get lost in all the marriage bickering

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@Sentient That’s sort of the point, that women have had social and legal restraints REMOVED from the legal contract of marriage, while men have not. The system is ALREADY BURNING DOWN lol It’s OVER. It’s ALREADY dead. There won’t BE a return to restraining women’s sexuality and socially/legally punishing them for bailing on their marriage vows, at least not in any of our lifetime. This was the whole point of my Monogamy is dead thing. With social media, men in her social circles, male workplace environments, etc women are only offering one-sided pLTRs: she keeps her options, the man gives… Read more »

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@Rollo , @YaReally Thanks for the link to this http://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/dream-daughter-single-mom/ Usual disclaimer: I don’t have kids. “I don’t think you’ve gone far enough YaReally. (…) Honestly, I don’t think you can serve two masters; you can serve Game and yourself, our you can serve your children as a Father.” Question for Rollo and Ya – even if you are inclined to take good care of your kids, isn’t it ultimately better to keep yourself as your first priority? At the very least, if your wife / baby momma detects you would do anything for your kids, I think you are… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@stringerbell “@yareally, i posted a FR a couple pages back that I’d appreciate your comments on…hoping it doesn’t get lost in all the marriage bickering” lol ya no prob I’m still sick as fuck so plenty of free time right now. Read it earlier and meant to write some notes on it cause it was good shit. “Since this is like extended social circle game (it’s a private party but the first time I’m meeting these girls) it’s mostly small talk and I’m just trying to enter small BT spikes and innuendo when I can because you don’t have to… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
5 years ago

@IAS “Question for Rollo and Ya – even if you are inclined to take good care of your kids, isn’t it ultimately better to keep yourself as your first priority?” If you’re NOT one of the UMC upper class who can manage to make marriage work, then your happiness is tanking according to Scribblerg’s data and the deadbedroom guys and MMSL guys etc then is it REALLY a great influence for your kid to see you miserable, your wife nagging you, she’s fat and you’re not attracted anymore and you’re frustrated because you haven’t had sex in months and have… Read more »

Höllenhund
Höllenhund
5 years ago

That’s why I’m stressing not just little even 5 year relatioships where most of it is NRE, but I’m talking 18+ years so you can raise a kid together in a stable 2 parent household. 18 years is a looooong time for the average guy to lose his mojo or miscalibrate or even cheat himself or fuck up keeping attraction The situation is worse than that. The social reality today is that most children don’t become independent at 18, they need financial and other support well into their 20s. And if we add the time necessary to even form a… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“I don’t think you’ve gone far enough YaReally . . . I think you’re clinging to a semblance of those old books yourself.” I’ve just scrolled past nearly everything since Rollo posted this. If there’s a gem in there somewhere, well, I’ll just have to live without it. I think I bear a large amount of the responsibility for setting off the spark for this particular round of this shit show, but it’s been interesting how since I laid out the proper framework for Marriage without marriage(tm) Ya Really has spun off into planning how to use Red Pill knowledge… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“The social reality today is that most children don’t become independent at 18, they need financial and other support well into their 20s.”

The legal reality is that in many cases the term of financial support has been extended from 18 to 24 years.

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

“Ya Really has spun off into planning how to use Red Pill knowledge to achieve Blue Pill Ideals.

It won’t work. It can’t work.”

“Resistance is not futile and Blaximus has the right of that. Get better.”

How do you reconcile these two thoughts?

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