For the past three years of The Rational Male there’s been a consistent presence in the comment threads of guys seeking advice for particular situations with regards to Game. Whether it’s fine tuning certain aspects of Game or a larger consensus of the guys participating in my comment threads it’s become obvious there’s a need for a dedicated page and comment thread to address these Field Reports.
So I’m instituting this page for exactly this. If there is some urgency to have members of The Rational Male community analyze your particular situation feel free to hit anyone up in the comments of my current post, but please refer them to your particular field report with a link to your comment here. I’m hoping this will alleviate the mass of posts for field report analysis and Game specific insights piled into the main blog post for any given week.
There will be some rules for this “forum” as such. I ask that you only keep your comments to addressing the field reports at hand and save your larger theoretical stuff for the main posts, or if relevant, keep the “bigger scope of things” posts to being as succinct as possible. There will be no moderation in this comment thread (spamming excepted), so realize it will be a very hot kitchen before you post. I will impose no restrictions on video links here, nor will I limit links to various, but pertinent articles.
Understand, this is an experiment for now. It’s likely this comment thread will exceed thousands of comments. I’ll be instituting new comment plug-ins for wordpress to deal with this in the future, but I may archive this page the the posts and refresh this page in the future as well. If this gets cumbersome I may simply institute a dedicated forum-style sub-site of The Rational Male to accommodate for Game specific questions.
So have at it, post your field reports and feel free to comment on the ones you have some particular insight for. Be forewarned that it’s likely things may get a bit salty at times and I expect a lot of back & forth with debate and disagreements, but that’s what this thread is for – to hash out Game particulars for your given situations.
How?! HOW do you be sexual with a woman without being creepy?! I don’t understand this shit. I’m 36 and all I want is to have sex once in my life, but I just cannot figure out the point at which a woman actually WANTS to have sex. That point never happens with me. I’m beyond desperate here. I have such a strong sex drive and all I’ve ever wanted is to get my dick wet. I feel like I’m the only person on earth who’s horny, and the only person on earth who’s excluded from sex. I swear that… Read more »
@SteadyNeurosion I had a long comment for you but that got eaten by a cross scripting attack of some type… basically, get Rollo’s first book, (if you can afford it) AND/or read the WHOLE first year section.. yes, the WHOLE first year… https://therationalmale.com/the-best-of-rational-male-year-one/ then come back with questions… this is an existential process, like weight training… ((we)) can NOT pull a deadlift/bench press/squat for you, but we can coach you to pull more weight and not get injured… or recover when you do ‘get injured’.. there are men here who can help you but NONE of us can do it… Read more »
@SteadyNeurosion
you will basically have to accept that ALL girls (AWALT) (even those conservative christian ‘unicorns’) are just slutty little bundles of emotional energy/fun… they all exist on a bell curve, but they are ALL the same under the hood… it’s firmware, not software…
good luck!
@Stuffinbox I’ve been meaning to reply to you but life’s getting away from me a bit here. Gamer girls are an odd mix. Just as odd if not more so than gamer guys. I can’t see how that works when she’s in heat. I don’t think it’s electronic proximity to alpha when she’s in heat. I just think society has taken an odd turn. I read that right, your son has a house he lives in and also a rental? That’s going well for a young man. Even if she is pretty, that’s one thing. It’s a question of how… Read more »
Can confirm what Palma’s seeing with his son, with my son in the mid teens crowd.
Just very little interest overall.
How’s everyone doing? I still check in here every few days but not much to report beyond digging myself out of my financial hole and getting fitter and stronger, so could be a lot worse.
I thought parenting would be easier as my kids got older but it seems to me the problems to be solved keep getting trickier…
I just don’t get how a man is supposed to get laid when all women seem to be completely and utterly asexual. Seriously, it seems like women have no sex drive whatsoever. I cannot figure out how our species even functions.
Welcome @SteadyNeurosion.
Give us some examples of your interactions with women and what makes you think this? And tell us your age and background with women
From my experience (and several other men here) it is quite the opposite – men (esp young men) are becoming increasingly apathetic and the women are getting more desperate.
@SteadyNeurosion I can tell you haven’t even cracked open year 1…lol.. if you had, you would be able to start to SEE… Ditto everything OTP asked… buuut you really do need to put in the work to be able to ‘SEE’ all those slutty bundles of fun on the go in real time… Year 1 to start… EVERY time (literally for the last 3 years) I go out my door I could get laid by AT LEAST 3 girls (college girls to hot 40s/50s)… and that’s just on a quick trip to the grocery store… a couple months ago (april)… Read more »
@Rollo
lost another long comment in a ‘jetpack’ cross-scripting accident…
HABD – you don’t mean the longish one that got through? Another one?
I still have the decade old reflexes from posting on Heartiste and having all the swallowed comments to copy paste a comment and save it till I see it’s been posted…
Let’s try again ..
@OTP
I lost a couple of long ones to @SteadyNeurosion… haven’t had time to redo..
I picked 5 year one intro articles so it wasn’t overwhelming to start reading –
genuine desire – what the goal is
And 4 AFC/buffering – to ID his current status and why he might not want to get started ..
You could post the links for him with explanations.. I don’t have time right now..
Maybe next week..
good luck!
I’ve read every article in Years One, Two, and Three (and many other sources). I fully understand and accept all the theory, but none of that matters much to me. I just crave a decently attractive woman who wants to be squirted full of cum. But apparently, women are repulsed if any man shows any interest in any way whatsoever! Apparently, the only thing a man can do for a CHANCE of fucking is to undergo some bullshit “personal development” that only works if it’s done “for himself” (as if trying to get laid ISN’T for himself). Well, I don’t… Read more »
@SteadyNeurosion – welcome back. Most men don’t go beyond the level of reading about this (if that) so the fact that you’re here at all is a good first step. The next step is to answer the questions HABD and I asked about your background – no need for identifying details but broadly your age, the general region you live in, your experience with women, and some examples of when women were “repulsed” by you. Would you go to a personal trainer in the gym and not tell him what your background with strength training was? He needs to know… Read more »
@SteadyNeurosion
“None of you understand the agony of such a powerful urge going unsatisfied for decades on end.”
this was me… AND I was married…
I completely understand your frustration..
give us your background info, like @OTP asked… we need that baseline…
good luck!
@SteadyNeurosion I guess we’ve all been where you are – most men have been somehow. And if you actually look around, you see many aspects of that. Even the Guardian made a youtube series about it this year. Even mainstream media get that something is odd with modern dating or hookup or whatever. The point is: there is still a loooooot of f****** going on everywhere around us. It’s just more concentrated. So A) you can well achieve that; but B) you need to be willing to PUT IN THE WORK ™. – that’s what habd and PalmaSailor told me… Read more »
@NNN1
glad to see you are doing well!
thanks for weighing in..
good luck!
I just crave a decently attractive woman who wants to be squirted full of cum.
You’re either a troll, or you have a lot of work to do.
Get your shit together and answer the questions which have been posed, and decide how you are going to move forward. Or don’t.
@SteadyNeurosion
https://therationalmale.com/2011/09/22/dream-girls-and-children-with-dynamite/
Re-read this.. your ‘dream girl ‘ is just a concept (any girl )/short term time frame at this point but it seems to be the same dynamic..
if you do actually want to change (and are not a troll) give us your background info and get ready to PUT IN THE WORK(tm) ..
good luck!
My question is as simple and straightforward as I can make it:
If being attracted to woman is repulsive to women…
…then how can a heterosexual man ever attract women?
Until someone answers this question, nothing else matters. And I’m certainly not going to waste my time and energy (or subject myself to the inevitable devastation of approaching) without an answer to it.
@Steadyneurosion If being attracted to woman is repulsive to women… …then how can a heterosexual man ever attract women? That’s wrong. Being attracted to a woman is repulsive if she isn’t attracted to the man attracted to her. If she’s attracted to a man, it will make her even more attracted knowing he’s attracted to her as well. BUT: to make her feel attracted to you, you need to make yourself an attractive male. Be it through styling, working out, social skills or else. Most men are automatically attracted to any woman above UG1. She doesn’t have to be even… Read more »
@Steadyneurosion
What exactly are you doing with your time right now anyway?
Hey all, new subject, has any one given up alcohol? I’m on day 19…
Palma – why?
For health reasons?
I don’t drink much anyway so not sure you can call it “giving up” but it’s been a couple months I think since my last drink? Not even sure.
I was down to a very much lower volume, 2-3 small tins but they were every night. This is a very very long way from the long lunches I was doing in my 40’s however I just wasn’t handling it and the sleep was objectively terrible. Waking at 03:00 etc and not going to sleep again and then having to go and try to do a full days physical work and then quoting customers evenings and writing those up in the aforementioned 03;00 am window. I just thought that the whole scenario is going to kill me and had to… Read more »
@Palma
That ‘f off’ feeling is called withdrawal…lol.
Hang tough and just be mindful of the cause..
It gets better with time… And I use kombucha as a fizzy substitute since I don’t like the fun-free beer taste ..
good luck!
and props on the 20 days!…
Heh two more weeks and you’ll probably be fine.
Will you reintroduce on weekends or something in a few months?
Am dealing with a crisis right now – still have some hope of containing it, but if not, will probably be posting here in the next few weeks for advise on handling proper SHTF marriage moment
@HABD @Palma That ‘f off’ feeling is called withdrawal…lol. Hang tough and just be mindful of the cause.. Yeah so far, I’m not actually missing the alcohol. I do have the after work cravings but the zero alcohol Guinness and Madri are dealing with that provided they’re cold enough. So far I’m not finding it that difficult. Sleep, energy etc are steadily improving. Though life does feel slightly “dull” I think that will change as my base level endorphins? / reward system recovers. I’m hitting the dark chocolate like a bitch, and I’m told by Mrs PS that dark chocolate… Read more »
Back in the time of COVID, I gave it up for a few months.
Was pretty easy at that time..just lost the taste.
In moments of crisis, up the Alpha. I’ll guarantee if your marriage is in crisis then it’s because you’re not being enough of an asshole rather than too much of one.
This. Every rough patch comes back to being too soft, too understanding, to …. Blah blah.
Good luck Palma. You know the process for reprogramming your mind and have done it before, which is the main thing. As for me, my marriage is actually great right now. Things are very good for a bunch of reasons (not financially but that’s separate and even that is improving). There is no crisis YET. YET. Because she doesn’t know what’s coming down the pike. It’s a long story, but short version – remember I told you guys a while ago i’d been experimenting with escorts and “massages” for a while to see what all the fuss was about and… Read more »
Well I’m not sure in Europe they’re entitled to trash your name like that.
Check the law where you are and lawyer up.
I can’t comment on the rest yet until I’ve re read it
Ok I’m struggling here.
1 you were daft enough to do it.
2 you weren’t doing anything illegal, but you didn’t breach company policy.
I’m not sure a straight breach which isn’t illegal justifies them trashing your reputation. It looks like it’s malicious and out of proportion to any damages / loss they’ve suffered.
I don’t even know why it’s sackable if you’re otherwise performing.
If you work for the BBC you can assfuck young boys and it’s cool.
Something is wrong here.
OTP
Jeez man…
Your lawyer should get super aggressive, your firing, if it happens should be with an NDA, he can threaten all sorts of counter claims, and press discovery and publicity… Lot of angles to get you some leverage.
Won’t be cheap.
Plenty of examples of guys who have come back from worse… Bill Clinton, Louis CK, Robert Kraft…
Frame… Strongest frame wins. That’s your angle.
Slept on it, and I’m not buying it that some HR karen can go nuclear and trash you personally for a legal deviation from co policy.
Not buying it.
Guys, why would I BS about this after all these years? Of course I changed some identifying details, as I always do with field reports to prevent anyone figuring out my identity (lot of good that has done me after my mistake lol), but the core story is 100% true. A stupid mistake on my part, combined with a mountainous amount of bad luck has left me in possibly the worst crisis of my life. I can’t explain the details of the company negotiation without revealing my identity (it’s too fact specific)- at that point I may as well sign… Read more »
Palma
Over here, an employment contract will be pretty scant but may reference Corporate Policies. And this are designed to end up exerting maximum control in ways that you couldn’t with an employment contract. Nefarious.
When I lost my big court case and I needed the right type of bankruptcy which got me a clean break (most state bankruptcy here ties you in and takes your surplus income for 6 years post event) I ended up with mental health problems so serious that I couldn’t function day to day, and in fact, the level of meds I was on were so high that I couldn’t actually operate power tools etc.. so I couldn’t work. My business went to shit etc… It was a dark part of my life and fortunately with the help of a… Read more »
Thanks guys.
Initial psych appointment booked. Not sure entirely how much it will help, but I guess I can use it or not depending on how things go.
@OTP Good luck Palma. You know the process for reprogramming your mind and have done it before, which is the main thing. As for me, my marriage is actually great right now. Things are very good for a bunch of reasons (not financially but that’s separate and even that is improving). There is no crisis YET. YET. Because she doesn’t know what’s coming down the pike. It’s a long story, but short version – remember I told you guys a while ago i’d been experimenting with escorts and “massages” for a while to see what all the fuss was about… Read more »
Coming up to a month free of alcohol and it’s been up and down. I’ve not had alcohol cravings, and the alcohol free beer has managed to kill things off when I’ve fancied a drink. About day 20 I had a seriously Black day but I’ve been feeling better day by day as endorphine levels have been re balancing however I think there’s a lot more to go there. Found myself unexpectedly on the air guitar to Bon Jovi in the kitchen today and I haven’t done that in at least a decade. On balance I think it’s going the… Read more »
@Palma
Props, Man!!!….
I think air guitar in the kitchen is a clinical waypoint in the recovery lit…lol
good luck!