Solipsism I

solipsism

“Women have always been the primary victims of war. Women lose their husbands, their fathers, their sons in combat. Women often have to flee from the only homes they have ever known. Women are often the refugees from conflict and sometimes, more frequently in today’s warfare, victims. Women are often left with the responsibility, alone, of raising the children.” – Hillary Clinton

I had planned on using Hillary’s now infamous quote for an upcoming post outlining the distinction between women’s innate solipsism and an acculturated narcissism, but fate delivered me a much more profound use for this quote last week (we’ll get to that in part II).

Before I dig in here I feel it’s kind of incumbent upon me to point out that I in no way align with, nor endorse Hillary’s political or ideological perspectives, and I think it should go without saying that I diametrically disagree with her feminine-primary social agendas.

That said, if you ever need a better quote to explain the realities of feminine solipsism I think I’d be at a loss to give you one. A lot of men, even Red Pill aware men, have a hard time understanding how solipsism fits concretely into the feminine psyche. The social conditioning and upbringing that predisposes us towards an egalitarian equalist mindset rebels against thinking women and men would have different psychological firmware. Equalism teaches us to expect that men and women’s needs share mutual origins and our impulses are so similar that any difference is insignificant.

That egalitarian frame predisposes us to consider that ‘not all women are like that‘ or to disassociate the idea that men and women could be anything but functionally equal agents. As a result we get convenient distractions to confuse our looking for comparatives to should anyone (or thing) challenge an equalist answer.

Simply put, we get rationales like “Oh well, men do it too”, or worse, or any opposite comparison that leads us away from considering the truth that men and women are psychologically, biologically and sociologically different; with different motives and different strategies which they employ to meet their different imperatives. And often these imperatives are at odds with the best interests of the other sex.

Separating Differences

The Cardinal Rule of Sexual Strategies:
For one gender’s sexual strategy to succeed the other gender must compromise or abandon their own.

It is the fundamental differences in either sex’s imperatives, acculturation and biology that creates this conflict. Of course, men and women have come together for each other’s mutual benefit (and love, and enjoyment) to create families and sustain our race for millennia, however, this mutually beneficial union does not originate from mutual imperatives or sexual strategies.

When I explain how women hold an opportunistic concept of love, while men hold an idealistic one, the resistance to accept that observable, behavioral, reality is rooted in a blank-slate belief that men and women are fundamentally the same. So, when we read a statement from a woman (to say nothing of a high status one) such as Hillary’s, we either scoff at the oblivious audacity of it because it is so counter to our (male) imperative’s interests, or we nod in ascension in the feminized belief that what best serves the female imperative necessarily is the best interest of the male imperative.

This is an illustration of the fundamental difference in the interpretation of experience between the sexes.

From a solipsistically oblivious female perspective what Hillary is expounding on here is entirely true. From a perspective that prioritizes feminine Hypergamy above all else, these three sentences make perfect, pragmatic sense. The idea that men losing their lives in warfare would make them victims at all (much less the primary victims) isn’t even an afterthought; all that matters is the long term security and continued provisioning of women and their imperatives.

Solipsism, not Narcissism

A lot of newly Red Pill aware men get confused at my using the term ‘solipsism‘ when I refer to this female-specific obliviousness to any concern – or lesser prioritized concern – of anything outside their immediate existential needs. The confusion comes from men who want for a similar justice to the one I outlined in Our Sister’s Keeper. Self-importance or narcissism would seem to be a more appropriate term for this dynamic, but I disagree.

Female solipsism in and of itself is not necessarily a net negative in the larger scope of human survival and evolution. On the surface that may seem a bit outrageous, but it’s only outrageous insofar as women’s solipsistic natures come into conflict with the biological and social imperatives of men. This solipsism is the necessary result of a feminine survival instinct that’s helped preserve women and their offspring in a violent, chaotic and uncertain evolution.

Recognizing the importance of feminine solipsism is not an endorsement of the anti-social, and often cruel, byproducts of it.

No doubt, men who’ve been on the sharp end of this will grind their teeth at the inevitable narcissism that becomes an extension of women’s solipsism. I’ll agree. Socially we’re living in an era of unprecedented (western) narcissism manifested in a vast majority of women.

At no other time in history have women become more accustomed to perceived entitlements of personal security, ubiquitous social control and relative assurances of optimizing Hypergamous imperatives. At no other time have women’s sexual strategies been of such primary importance to society. However, this narcissism is the result of an acculturation and learned social priorities that predispose women to expectations that border on arrogance. Over recent generations that narcissism has become learned and fostered in women to the point that narcissism is openly embraced as a feminine strength – women believe it’s their due after a long suffrage.

Women’s solipsistic nature however is an integral part of their evolved psychological firmware. Solipsism is the evolved, selected-for result of self-preservation necessities that ensured the survival of our species. As men we get frustrated by this intrinsic nature; a nature that puts women’s imperatives as their primary mental point of origin. As any newly aware Red Pill man will attest, coming to this realization is a very hard truth to accept. It’s cruel and contrary to what the First Set of Books have taught him he should expect and build his life around.

Furthermore, it’s cruel in the respect that this solipsism neither aligns with the romantic, Blue Pill hopes he’s been raised to accept, but also the egalitarian, equal and level playing field ideology he’s been conditioned to believe he should alter his priorities to accommodate for women; and in turn he can expect from women. As I stated earlier, coming to terms with men and women’s differing concepts of love is a tough disillusionment, but this difference in concept is simply one of many a man must come to terms with.

When I wrote Empathy I got taken to task about women’s capacity to feel empathy to a greater degree than do men. It’s not that women cannot feel empathically (a shared experience), my argument was that the idea that women feel a ‘greater’ empathy than men was a social convention with the latent purpose of masking women’s innate solipsism.

That wasn’t a very popular idea. The notion that women are the mothers and nurturers was predictably spelled out, but with regards to empathizing and caring for men the primary concern of women was worry over their own and their children’s well being before that of their men should they become incapacitated. Again, this is a cruel truth, but also a pragmatic and survival based one.

Mental Point of Origin

Women’s mental point of origin begins with their own self-importance, and the overriding importance of their own and their offspring’s survival. I’ve had women readers lambast me that they couldn’t possibly be so influenced by solipsism because they put their children’s wellbeing before their own. However it is just this solipsism that predisposes women to seeing their children as extensions of themselves and their own identities. And the good news is that this dynamic is one reason the human species has been so successful.

The following was a comment from Starve the Beast on the TRP subredd:

Women are bad at reasoning, but good at rationalization.

Let that sink in for a minute. One cannot rationalize without the faculty for reason. So are women really bad at reasoning? No, actually they’re great at it.

The difference is that women don’t place as much value on Truth as they do upon self-preservation, and therefore their reasoning processes do not abort when self-contradiction is reached. They’ll just rationalize their way out of that too, if exposed.

Ultimately, the so-called hamster reflects an underlying difference in value systems more than in reasoning ability.

Women can learn to sublimate their solipsism. In fact, cultures and progressive societies have been founded on sublimating female solipsism. Women can and do learn critical thinking quite regularly. Women can learn and function within a society that forces them to compromise their sexual strategies and mitigates the worst abuses that solipsism would visit on men (and themselves). Women can learn to be empathetic towards men as well as live within a social order that looks like mutual justice and fairness.

But the fact that these civil dynamics should need to be something a woman learns only reinforces the biological and evolved influences of female solipsism as women’s mental point of origin. The parallel to this is men’s learning to sublimate intrinsic parts of themselves – primarily their sexuality – to reinforce prosocial interaction in society. 

Women dislike the idea that their experience is colored by solipsism. It sounds bad, and it runs counter to what they believe are sacrifices on their own part to help others. That may be so, and I’m certainly not going to attempt to discount those investments, but they come from a learned compassion that must overcome an innate solipsism. That ‘me and my babies first’ mental point of origin isn’t necessarily a bad thing either – it’s only when that learned compassion and humility are superseded by it that anti-social behaviors and hubris arise.

I expect the predictable criticism will be that men are also self-important, and / or all humans are intrinsically selfish fucks. In part II I’ll elaborate more on this, but for now it’s important to grasp that female solipsistic nature is less about selfish individualism and more about pragmatic survival.

Many a male reader of my Hierarchies of Love series grated against the idea that a conventional model of love would progress from Men to women, women to children, children to puppies, etc. That model is a direct reflection of a uniquely female solipsism that seemingly discards men’s reciprocal emotional investment in women. However it is also the same dynamic that predisposes women to desire men who can decisively control their environment as well as dominate them sexually and emotionally.

In part II I’ll outline more examples of feminine solipsism, how it’s reflected on the individual and societal level and how a man might best use an understanding of it to his advantage.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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[…] Solipsism I […]

The Diplomat
Guest
The Diplomat

Another great one, Rollo. And particularly germane to recent conversations I’ve been having with some of my closest friends about female sexual/survival strategies and how to best mitigate damage in various specific scenarios while still enjoying a pleasant and mutually beneficial intersexual existence with women from a Red Pill frame. I believe the biggest takeaway here for the newly RP aware man is that female solipsism is not intrinsically ‘evil’ (although it certainly feels that way to a BP man who wakes up one day to find his dreams of relational equity and his illusions of romantic investment parity in… Read more »

SD
Guest
SD

Some thoughts. One;the first and only directive women follow -A Prime Directive, for you Star Trek fans- is Them and Their Kids. You see that tatted up barfly halfway through a bottle of SoCo at last call? She not only plans on having kids, but knows exactly what number and what precise resources are required to raise them.She also has an equally precise idea which sort of man she needs to make this happen. I know this because women have told me this, in plain language, in the clear without slant or deceit. More importantly this Prime Directive correlates with… Read more »

Luxocrat
Guest
Luxocrat

I asked my ex that last month, if her kids came first or if I did. She paused and said “I really don’t know. That’s a hard one.” I replied “Then it’s your kids.” I recall my ex-wife reading one of those save your marriage books right after I made it clear I was leaving. She read me a line in it and said she sees how she was wrong. The line went something like this: “If you want to have a strong marriage, you need to understand your husband comes first, even before your children. They must be taught… Read more »

Sun Wukong
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Sun Wukong

@Rollo Women dislike the idea that their experience is colored by solipsism. It sounds bad, and it runs counter to what they believe are sacrifices on their own part to help others. They start early on coloring their shit too. In school, the first thing we were taught in sex ed: “Boys (little unfeeling shits that we are) use love to get sex; girls use sex to get love.” Right off the bat, the language has connotations that the male sexual strategy is evil, but the female sexual strategy is searching for love. Wanting love is not evil, wanting sex… Read more »

BC
Guest
BC

the first and only directive women follow -A Prime Directive, for you Star Trek fans- is Them and Their Kids. I’ve seen too many women place their kids at risk or even sacrifice them for the sake of tingles to agree with this. The Prime Directive for women is Them. The lesser-Prime Directive for women is Their Kids. Some women will combine these into one Directive. Maybe even many women, although I would argue that is more a case of simply not yet being tempted/tingled enough. But like the saying that, “Every man has his price,” I think it comes… Read more »

BC
Guest
BC

Three; no such thing as a free Orgasm. If an interaction with a man doesnt in some way assist a woman’s Prime Directive , that interaction Will Not Happen.

Briffault’s Law.
http://www.stickmanweekly.com/ReadersSubmissions2009/reader5546.htm

Always Briffault’s Law.

Flatnose
Guest
Flatnose

AF/BB circa 1963 courtesy of Betty Everett – You’re no good. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-s4KfO7xX-0

Burden of Performance Helene Smith – You Got To Be a Man 1967
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpSRqG5tM24

Strewth I just love this soul…

Flatnose
Guest
Flatnose

AF/BB circa 1963 courtesy of Betty Everett – You’re no good.

Webley Tempest
Guest
Webley Tempest

The redpillroom had a good post about solipsism. The part at the bottom where he recounts his experience working as the only male in an office of a dozen or so females, is also interesting/entertaining.

http://theredpillroom.blogspot.co.uk/2012/09/the-tangled-chains-on-swing-set-of.html?m=1

Bongo Bongo
Guest
Bongo Bongo

Could there be a bigger proof that most men are blue pill simps than that this trouser-sui-wearing, hatchet-faced, man-hating witch is being considefed a serious candidate for president. Ib a world where men had the tiniest amount of real world understanding NONE would ever vote for her. She’d literally have to get ALL the female vote.

Truman
Guest
Truman

Rollo, it would be great if you could provide some evidence for female solipsism beyond a few examples. From my own experience I could name a few solipsistic women, but I could do the same for men as well, and I’m far from convinced that the trait is universal in women, or even that it’s more prevalent in women than in men.

Seething Lurker
Guest
Seething Lurker

Another great post.

This, from SD: “Most men don’t understand that level of commitment to ones personal life. Us guys view coupling as a side-activity to Other Stuff like career, hobbies, etc. Women view that subject as THEIR ENTIRE existence.”

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

This nails it on so many levels. Well done Rollo. I’d add, I am not so sure women themselves are conciously aware of their “strategy” which may be part of the reason the protest it so loudly. Admitting solipsism is a mostly female trait is akin to acknowledging AWALT. And yes, AWALT when it come right down to the brass tacks. It’s part of the program and that program is not going to change. It can be buffered but it will never ever change. Women cannot think “just like men do” no matter how much equalists may say it is… Read more »

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

If AWALT does that mean I Am like that? Yes, yes it does, even if I don’t necessarily like it, I will admit it. Since the red pill exposed me to the idea of solipsism I have become more aware of it in myself and it’s actually helped me try to (somewhat) transcend it. Or if not that, be aware of it. But even so, it still drives my behavior to a large degree, even if I don’t like that idea or want to be “like that.” For example, my desire to get married. It’s in my best interest, as… Read more »

A Definite Beta Guy
Guest

Truman,

What would you describe as male solipsism?

fleezer
Guest
fleezer

“is being married to one woman versus giving up his options really in his best interest?” solipsism inside a response to a post about solipsism. doesn’t get much better than that. she assumes marriage means a man gives up his options. this is false. As a married man I will fuck the brains out of any woman who crosses my attractiveness threshold. I will fuck her in a car, in the woods, in a bathroom. My wedding ring has no dampening effect on my cock and in some cases it actually makes me more attractive for a fling because the… Read more »

Paul Murray
Guest

Philosphical solipsism is the position that the only thing that exists is me, and I am basically imaging the whole rest of the world.

“Female solipsism”, in the extended political sense, is: “The only thing that exists is the world of women”.

The problem and commonality between the two is that, well, they are wrong. And permitting yourself to fall down that rabbit hole makes you supremely unequipped to deal with the Real World™. Women only exist as a class because of the cocoon of stuff that men provide for them.

Andy
Guest
Andy

Women can learn to sublimate their solipsism. In fact, cultures and progressive societies have been founded on sublimating female solipsism.

I love the use of the word “progressive” here. 🙂

Rollo, can you expound on this? Does anyone have any ideas on exactly what Rollo might be referencing?

Second class status (e.g. old Christianity, Islam)?

scribblerg
Guest
scribblerg

@SD – “And we wonder why women hold us men in low esteem nowadays.” We fail to take ourselves as seriously as we do women. The saddest part of the FI soaked world we live in is that it creates men women are going to hate, yet another proof point that anything run by women goes to shit in a heartbeat. Guys, think about it? Do you want to fuck someone who is mewling and begging and desperate? How attractive is that? How can you respect that? This is why women prefer (if begrudginly) “the cad” – they at least… Read more »

ianironwood
Guest

Men don’t typically run toward solipsism, outside of a vocal few Gammas and Omegas. On the contrary, men run toward sacrifice. Just as women have the “women and children first!” mentality, men have a sacrificial instinct that is just as strong. It’s like we’re subconsciously looking for a reason to make that glorious effort. Recent news stories bear this out: a gunman on a train, and of the people who threw themselves into hopeless danger, it was all men who responded and no women. State trooper is overwhelmed by a criminal, it was men who stopped and took custody of… Read more »

scribblerg
Guest
scribblerg

Re: RedPillGirlNotes – Guys, read what she said very carefully. Notice that she innately gets that marriage/monogamy innately serves the woman, not the man. It’s against our nature and interests. @Fleezer – You are spot on. I’ve begun to wonder if married women begin to hate their husbands exactly because they do submit to monogamy and one woman possessing us, and as a result feel no challenge in “keeping us”, hence the dwindling tingles that become loathing. I was out with a woman in NYC for dinner one night and the topic of marriage came up. I said, “Well, I… Read more »

Longtorso
Guest
Longtorso

At a sensuous retreat, female sexual desire takes center stage …Madsen, a sexuality and relationship coach, uses terms like “crisis of female desire,” “vaginal disconnect” or just “angry pussies,” but we’re talking about the same thing: Women not being in touch with their desire, women being ashamed of their desire and/or women not expressing their desire and riding it like the wild pony it is. The retreats, often set in glorious settings like Tuscany, offer hands-on “Taoist sensuous bodywork” sessions, workshops and exercises to overcome body shame and explore desires as well as group discussions on body image, expressing desire,… Read more »

rugby11ljh
Guest
rugby11ljh

“The parallel to this is men’s learning to sublimate intrinsic parts of themselves – primarily their sexuality – to reinforce prosocial interaction in society.”

That’s me as a teenager

scribblerg
Guest
scribblerg

As for the topic at hand, I have a serious quibble with trying to lessen the moral impact of being solipsistic. I used to believe that women were not solipsistic and railed against this in my early RP days, but now to me it’s a given. Let’s look at the word: sol·ip·sism – noun the view or theory that the self is all that can be known to exist. What it means in practice is that such a person sees the others as one might see characters on a TV screen or in a movie or cartoon. They are merely… Read more »

Andy
Guest
Andy

Only then does she begrudgingly turn the car around and drop me back off, but is only annoyed and doesn’t give a shit.

Do you think the reaction would have been different in an Alpha frame? Is this solipsism, or the reaction of hypergamically unsatisfied woman? Or is that the same thing?

agent p
Guest
agent p

Long live dread, the cold bucket of water that sharpens her focus

Lurker
Guest
Lurker

OT

PUA regurgitates every feminist dogma on 21 convention and gets shit on the comments.

Lurker
Guest
Lurker

By the way, this video is good, yareally would recommend, lol

link: youtube.com/ watch?v=nuvL7Dk8x8s

scribblerg
Guest
scribblerg

@Andy – Tell me, does your compassion for someone vary based on whether you were in an “alpha frame” or not? And no, I didn’t see this as hypergamous, I saw it as solipsistic – two entirely different ideas. Many married men will tell you of similar experiences. I don’t think she’d give a shit about any man’s injury or harm or suffering. This same ex also had the habit of hitting men when she was mad at them. Get the scenario. She’s a petite dime (homecoming and prom queen) and just punches or hits in what she thinks is… Read more »

lh
Guest
lh

The term Solipsism does in my view not equal egoism or following your genders agenda. Just as women men do that to the extent their surroundings let them. I also strongly disagree with a view men tend to sacrifice themselves. Betas do that, not alphas though. It’s a mislead masculinity. The difference between genders is men know and understand when being egoistic or egocentric (and they do it anyway) while the female thinking hides the egoism from the women itself. Solipsism means not even understanding how egoistic and egocentric she is. The Solipsism of women and some men comes from… Read more »

scribblerg
Guest
scribblerg

My comment on solipsism may reveal while I feel leaving a woman sticky, broke and confused is a perfectly moral way to behave. After realizing not a single one of them would be there for me in my time of need, I’ve adjusted. I get what i want out of them, and anything else is gravy. My needs come first and if they aren’t meeting them, I’m out. I also play them like harps now without any regret. This is how a self-respecting, sentient being should respond to such treatment. Not by trying to find a “unicorn” or an NAWALT… Read more »

Andy
Guest
Andy

I don’t think she’d give a shit about any man’s injury or harm or suffering.

Yeah, but if she dreaded losing you she might pretend to care. Or actually care? I am not sure. I’m sure you’ve seen the cheerleaders fawn over the injured QB.

keyser Soze
Guest
keyser Soze

The worst solipsism :
1 , feminists.
2,ugly women with education.
3,cougars.
4,fat women.

Not Born This Morning
Guest
Not Born This Morning

@Rollo – “Women’s solipsistic nature however is an integral part of their evolved psychological firmware. Solipsism is the evolved, selected-for result of self-preservation necessities that ensured the survival of our species” “Women’s mental point of origin begins with their own self-importance, and the overriding importance of their own and their offspring’s survival”. Survival?? WTF?? “Survival” ?????? This has nothing to do with “survival”. Survival is literally guaranteed in our society today. If you are referencing some left over residual innate instinctive drive, then I only partially agree. No one is so stupid to miss the fact that children are most… Read more »

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lessonsfromthearena
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Reblogged this on Lessons From the Arena.

Bromeo
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Bromeo

@scribblerg

“I’m a natural alpha and women never cared about my suffering, no matter how dominant the scenario.”

There are no natural alpha’s on this site, not even rollo.

Bromeo
Guest
Bromeo

@NBTM

“This has nothing to do with “survival”. Survival is literally guaranteed in our society today. If you are referencing some left over residual innate instinctive drive, then I only partially agree.”

So you don’t believe in hypergamy or briffault’s law neither? The red pill is founded on females innate biological drives.

keyser Soze
Guest
keyser Soze

I don’t know why the manosphere still call women solipistic, we should call it for what it is, DELUSIONAL.

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

NBTM – “Survival is literally guaranteed in our society today.” Physical survival yes, social survival not so much. In the absence of a genuine threat to physical security the only worry is social security via status! and that is the nature of hypergamy. It’s why women branch swing even if they have secured a top man, because there is always someone better, someone with more, newer, or higher status! The social survival angle also explains excesses in fashion, materialism, and plastic surgery. Without any actual immediate physical threats the latent fear of possible, though unlikely, material deprivation seems to cause… Read more »

SJF
Guest
SJF

@ScribblerG and Andy

Rollo dealt with this in terms of lack of empathy and sympathy in the essay “Empathy”. It arises from solipsism but is a more specific lacking in the nature of women relating to men.

“Women do not lack a capacity to sympathize with male hardship or pain, but they categorically lack a capacity to empathize with uniquely male experiences.”

And Scribbler, guess how much empathy and sympathy I am getting from my wife for my current abstinent state. (Not that I need any at all, and it is not a topic of discussion at all, but it’s none).

keyser Soze
Guest
keyser Soze

“Fyi, I’m a natural alpha and women never cared about my suffering,”

Now this is solipsism.

Ps,
Natural Alpha who is suffering ! .

Joe
Guest
Joe

You want to have babies with a woman you live with, get married. It’s pretty good.

You want to experience love? Have a son and take care to raise him properly. That kid will love you, and it’s quite likely he will own your heart.

just getting it
Guest
just getting it

The thing I never understood when I was ill or injured was that wifey was angry at me. It was as if I was repressing her when I was fit and she was now able to take revenge.

As always I was over complicating it – she was just being a twat.

Not Born This Morning
Guest
Not Born This Morning

@scribblerg I relate to your sentiments. When our daughter was born she was diagnosed with a chromosome malformation. My wife and her mother became extremely emotionally theatrical, and angry with the physician who diagnosed the problem simply for diagnosing it. The medical staff was obviously disgusted with their antics and started communicating details to me to avoid having to deal with the soap opera. They wailed on and on about “the baby” as if condition of “the baby” had ruined their plans. Our daughter may as well have been nothing more than a defective object that ruined their expectations of… Read more »

Not Born This Morning
Guest
Not Born This Morning

@Bromeo

“Believe in” ?

I am not required to, nor will I, pretend the same things to myself as you prefer to pretend to yourself.

Unlike you, I prefer to base my perceptions upon my actual experience of reality rather than paradigms borrowed from others. Intellectual plagiarism is the epitome of intellectual laziness and only makes you appear to be a parroting drooling zombie.

Not Born This Morning
Guest
Not Born This Morning

@Badpainter

You make an excellent point. Thank you.

However, should we allow ourselves to be held hostage by a concern for woman’s right to social survival? Are their rights more important than ours?

Not Born This Morning
Guest
Not Born This Morning

@Rollo –

“Alpha frame may satisfy Hypergamy, but it is a thing apart from feminine solipsism”

Yet its very existence as defined in terms of male – female interaction is based upon feminine perspective.

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

NBTM – “However, should we allow ourselves to be held hostage by a concern for woman’s right to social survival? Are their rights more important than ours?”

No and fuck no.

TheLastCoyote
Guest
TheLastCoyote

@Sun Wukong wrote, “Every shit-driving soccer mom in a full size SUV that’s nearly run me off the road on my bike while paying attention to her crotch goblins in the back is the end game of Solipsism Gone Wild. ‘Fuck you, I got mine” is the zeitgeist of our time, shouted loudly and proudly by a chorus of harpies.” You must live in my slice of suburbia. This is an almost perfect description of the soccer moms in my area. The only thing I would add is they’re really good at hiding their “fuck you, I got mine” attitude… Read more »

Kid Jupiter
Guest
Kid Jupiter

@NBTM

Why would you stay married to such a woman?

Sun Wukong
Guest
Sun Wukong

Had a young (slightly underage, unfortunately) gorgeous HB9 and a couple of her similarly aged male friends I was talking with at a coffee shop the other day. At one point they asked if I was married. I replied that I was not, then one of the guys started talking about how he was looking for a woman to have a long term thing with. I told him “No man should ever consider settling down before 30. Ever.” First one to really react was the chick. Despite the fact that several times in the conversation both guys and her had… Read more »

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

TheLastCoyote – “I’ve never understood why having a wife who’s a stay-at-home mom is revered in many corners of Red Pill Land.” The ideal marriage requires a wife who provides: 1. Sex… 2. …resulting in children 3. Domestic services… 4. …such that they enhance the status! of the husband In exchange the husband provides; 1. Material provisions 2. Physical security 3. Social security and respectability A wife who works outside the home can’t really do her job at home because of logistics and mental distraction. And women hate men who reverse the homemaker/provider roles so that’s not an option. Thus… Read more »

Razorwire
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Razorwire

Some recent experience with single women, particularly younger women, suggests to me that solipsism as a mechanism of self-preservation no longer operates in an environment where there is need for such. Without a social or biological ‘receptor’, her solipsism becomes unbridled, free to fester in areas that serve no purpose. This absence of necessity does not render it inert but rather allows it to go unchecked. Where once her solipsism worked toward self-preservation it now works toward self-promotion. I think this is where we see the slide into narcissistic personality traits. But I’ll leave that to Rollo to dissect. I… Read more »

Water Cannon Boy
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Water Cannon Boy

@Flatnose
Thanks for putting up that version of that song, instead of Linda Ronstadt’s. Which I do like, and I love Linda Ronstadt’s singing. But I like finding out about and knowing when someone has done the original song, (if Betty Everett’s is actually the original recording) when someone else is given more credit for covering it.
Due to loving many different kinds of music and knowing how the music business has been historically in the way it’s treated lots of artist

Watching day time television analytically, you’ll see all kinds of examples of solipsism.

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

Rollo is a smart man. I was agreeing with him, btw, not arguing for a solipsism pass. He’s correct in saying it is how women are hardwired, IMHO. The fact that is is so askew today is because the current lack of societal restraint on it allows it to run amuck. To women’s own detriment. It’s gone so far the feminine imperative will flip back against feminism itself is my bet. Or hope anyway. Peace.

Andy
Guest
Andy

I’ve never understood why having a wife who’s a stay-at-home mom is revered in many corners of Red Pill Land.

True story. I just got back from lunch. Wife made me a sandwich, then I fucked her. Then I came back to work.

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

And yes i get it that even my concern about the impact on women, and myself, is sophilistic. Because I am a woman and AWALT. Women’s worst fear is that stuff falls apart. Not that they are putting it together that they themselves are driving that.

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

Please also do not misunderstand that I am condoning women’s bad behavior or the atrocious way many of you describe how you have been treated. I am saying it’s NOT ok or good.

Andy
Guest
Andy

bear in mind that an Alpha frame may satisfy Hypergamy, but it is a thing apart from feminine solipsism.

I read the empathy post. I still don’t get the whole cheerleaders fawning over the injured QB phenomenon. How does this relate to solipsism and hypergamy?

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

Hi Badpainter, good to see you again!

kobayashii1681
Guest

“to the point that narcissism is openly embraced as a feminine strength…”

And this is not just in the west sensei…other westernised societies, even here in urban cities in Africa.

Eagerly awaiting part II!

Flatnose
Guest
Flatnose

I cannot remember where I read it but there is an anthropological model which states that: men identify themselves by what they do: provide, protect, fuck. As those were the skills to ensure survival of the species and led to status and mating opportunities. However, in the stoneage, women not having the physical strength to hunt and fight as single units, needed to bond with a sisterhood to survive and gain collective shaming power and control over the rules allowing men access to sex. in order to get control over men. Hence social bonding became their strength. The banishments of… Read more »

TheLastCoyote
Guest
TheLastCoyote

@Badpainter – In theory, those are the benefits of having a SAHM wife. In the past, maybe as recent as even 30 years ago, many guys with a SAHM wife did in fact enjoy those benefits in reality.

Not so sure as many guys with SAHM wives enjoy those benefits today, though. Like your average career woman, today’s average SAHM wears her “busy-ness” as a badge of honor and their narcissism knows no bounds.

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

One more thought and I’ll be quiet. It is because of good men like Rollo and Badpainter and others that I even begin to understand any of this and how destructive women have become. In fact I started a blog to try and translate these things to women hoping they might hear it from a fellow woman easier than from a man who they have been brainwashed to think is the enemy. So I mean no harm and apologize if I have upset anyone. Peace.

Andy
Guest
Andy

In the past, maybe as recent as even 30 years ago, many guys with a SAHM wife did in fact enjoy those benefits in reality.

Maybe I’m being naive, but I believe it’s possible for almost every man today. You might have fewer and less desirable “stuff” than dual income people, but it’s worth it. IMO

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

Rollo – “Solipsism is a psychological vestige from a time when conditions necessitated an overwhelming need for security”

A time that ended, more or less, about 100 years ago. So thousands of years of behavioral/physical evolution vs. 100 years of easy survival, I wonder which has greater influence?

Bromeo
Guest
Bromeo

“Unlike you, I prefer to base my perceptions upon my actual experience of reality rather than paradigms borrowed from others. Intellectual plagiarism is the epitome of intellectual laziness and only makes you appear to be a parroting drooling zombie.”

Anger phase activated, sigh.

http://therationalmale.com/2015/08/19/peak-hypergamy/

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

Oh and…

Howdy Bloom! Nice to see your still around.

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

Re: SAHM

I think the degree to which a man believes such an ideal is real possibility is directly related to his faith that the First Set of Books is still in effect.

Bromeo
Guest
Bromeo

@Badpainter

“A time that ended, more or less, about 100 years ago. So thousands of years of behavioral/physical evolution vs. 100 years of easy survival, I wonder which has greater influence?”

This.

Andy
Guest
Andy

Confirmed Alpha status in a man is intrinsically valuable to women. If the QB is unattached and the cheerleader is in sexual competition for his attention it serves her solipsistic interest to fawn on him when he’s hurt.
If the cheerleader and the QB have been married for a few years and her security is dependent upon him measuring up to a burden of performance she expect from him, you’ll see a much different scenario when he’s injured.

This is what I was thinking, but doesn’t that mean that solipsism and hypergamy are intrinsically intertwined?

Andy
Guest
Andy

I think the degree to which a man believes such an ideal is real possibility is directly related to his faith that the First Set of Books is still in effect.

Directly or inversely? Because I’m living it. So I know it’s possible.

kobayashii1681
Guest

@Bromeo – On solipsism and hypergamy: Correct, was about to say the same thing.

@Keyser: “I don’t know why the manosphere still call women solipistic, we should call it for what it is, DELUSIONAL.”

Solipsism is an evolutionary mechanism. It may cause them to act in a way that we men, especially when we are BP, see it as delusion…but it is merely a fact of their existence – what should be more in focus, is our awareness, the degree to which they act based on it….

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

@ Andy

Directly.

I should have said a likely possibility, instead of real possibilty. Also bear in mind if your situation doesn’t conform to my description then either you’re:

1. An exception.

2. An example of how a generalization fails to work for an individual case, like how BMI is poor measure of individual health but a good indicator for aggregate populations.

kobayashii1681
Guest

@Andy: “This is what I was thinking, but doesn’t that mean that solipsism and hypergamy are intrinsically intertwined?”

Yes. They reinforce each other.

Andy
Guest
Andy

1. An exception. Yeah, no. It is harder than it probably used to be because society tells girls that careers are “So rewarding!” Luckily for me daycare is so f’ing expensive that it isn’t financially worth it for a woman to work unless she’s making a serious amount of money. I basically worked it from that angle, and then guilt about missing all those memories of the kids growing up. The guilt angle works really well. Once you get her to the point where you’re supporting her mixed with red pill internalized alpha… You’re golden. It’s natural. It is not… Read more »

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

I know I said I’d be quiet but this:

“The banishments of the slut (you cannot give sex away for free) and bad mother (loss of moral high ground) are methods in which the sisterhood keep their powerbase strong.”

This is what women used to do but don’t anymore – keep each other in check or ostracize the ones who wouldn’t. Frivorce was nit ok. Rollo is again correct that thanks to the “go gurrrl, empowerment, likes on social media, women now egg on bad behavior. Not good for men or women or children.

lh
Guest
lh

Joe September 3rd, 2015 at 11:45 am “You want to have babies with a woman you live with, get married. It’s pretty good. You want to experience love? Have a son and take care to raise him properly. That kid will love you, and it’s quite likely he will own your heart.” That last point is a very underrated topic in the manosphere. And I don’t agree with Joe. In my opinion that path is very dangerous. Directing your need for love towards your children will not so much harm them, it gives them power over you (I know because… Read more »

redpillgirlnotes
Guest

Andy your children will also be so much more secure for it as well. Good for you guys!

Oodly some of the women I counsel irl who are the most unhaaaapy are sahm which I don’t get. So that’s a risk, maybe that message from society that mothering is “not a career” or something causes this. I tell these women they are LUCKY to have a man who does that for their family! Appreciate him (sammiches and nooners are good ideas!)

lh
Guest
lh

“Oodly some of the women I counsel irl who are the most unhaaaapy are sahm which I don’t get.”

Providing for the women is beta, no wonder they are unhappy. I thought you were Red Pill?

keyser Soze
Guest
keyser Soze

And the solipsism Oscar goes too,,(drum,drum, drum,drum),
Michelle Carter, she was being a good Samaritan by encouraging her friend to kill himself.

lh
Guest
lh

“And the solipsism Oscar goes too,,(drum,drum, drum,drum),
Michelle Carter, she was being a good Samaritan by encouraging her friend to kill himself.”

The interesting point about that case was how she acted just as a man should towards a BPD-bitch making suicide threats.

Sun Wukong
Guest
Sun Wukong

@redpillgirlnotes It’s gone so far the feminine imperative will flip back against feminism itself is my bet. Or hope anyway. “Will”? Try “has”. The group I mentioned talking to further up thread was mostly just having their own conversation at the same table I was at, so I was mostly just leaving them to their own devices to satisfy my own curiosity. Listening to their conversation was enlightening, particularly at a moment when one of the guys trampled in to a moment that would offend your typical SJW. He then turned to the chick and said “You’re not a feminist… Read more »

Flatnose
Guest
Flatnose

@Water Cannon Boy Thanks. Full history here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/You%27re_No_Good “You’re No Good” is a song written by Clint Ballard, Jr. which first charted for Betty Everett in 1963 and became a number 1 hit in 1975 for Linda Ronstadt. The original version of “You’re No Good” was cut by Dee Dee Warwick for Jubilee Records in 1963 with production by Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller. Morpheus: The Matrix is everywhere, it is all around us, even now in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window, or you turn on your television. You can feel it… Read more »

Andy
Guest
Andy

Andy your children will also be so much more secure for it as well. Good for you guys! Thanks, I hope so. My wife’s happiness is basically my highest priority. I view it kind of like the girl in the bubble at the top of the post. Her bubble is the kids and the house work. I take care of everything else. It actually surprises me how little she cares about anything outside of that bubble. I know that when the kids are in school and she has free time it may be a different dynamic. We’ll see how it… Read more »

Sun Wukong
Guest
Sun Wukong

@Andy There’s lots of part time work from home stuff like Mechanical Turk and a bunch of different freelance job boards for people of various talents. Those seem like a really great solution if a SAHM finds herself with time on her hands. Even the availability of online educational resources like Kahn Academy and Udacity are great if she wants to refresh subjects she could help her kids with for school or even study stuff she might want to get in to eventually. Honestly there’s more resources than ever to keep a SAHM happy, educated, and busy when the kids… Read more »

YaReally
Guest

@Rollo Agree completely with the article. Even a lot of PUAs hang onto the “if I do X she’ll do Y” belief and it can take a brutal “wtf was that??” moment for them to learn about solipsism the hard way. Thing is a lot of guys will get pissed off like “these girls are such selfish bitches” when their girl is “annoyed” that their man is sick for more than a day or two and suddenly stops being nurturing toward them. But when you understand that her subconscious is basically thinking “maybe my man isn’t the invincible superman I… Read more »

YaReally
Guest

@Sun Wukong “Honestly there’s more resources than ever to keep a SAHM happy, educated, and busy when the kids become a part time thing by starting school, and to help her head back in to the workforce once they’re completely independent. It’s really a great time to be in that position if you’re a woman.” I would be a fucking BEAST if all I had to do all day was vaccuum a carpet and cook some dinner and then sit online learning shit and someone else would not just pay all my bills but be trying to provide enough for… Read more »

Andy
Guest
Andy

Honestly there’s more resources than ever to keep a SAHM happy, educated, and busy when the kids become a part time thing by starting school

Yeah, I just have to be careful. I am not going to let her work. She has this sort of manic thing where she obsesses about being the perfect worker and nothing else matters. Then of course she’s an anxious mess. If she’s working for me, she’s happy as a clam. I just need to figure something out.

YaReally
Guest

Also because I realize it could sound contradictory: I said that I’m logically convincing an FB to not bail on her boyfriend when I also said you can’t logically convince a girl to think/feel certain shit (like giving her a laundry list of why she should be attracted to you). The nuance between the two is that I understand how attraction works and the triggers that get her Hypergamy going, so I’m making sure that the things I’m saying are creating emotional impact in her and triggering specific fears in her that I know her sub-brain worries about, and at… Read more »

LSCS
Guest
LSCS

Cheerleaders fawning over the QB is a short-term attention seeing behavior. If the QB ends up in long-term disability, then she’s just too busy with cheer leading to visit the rehab facility.

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