The Best of The Rational Male – Year Six

Last weekend (August 19th) this blog entered into its seventh year, and once more it’s time to do the blog retrospective.

The Books

First and foremost last month I released the third installment in the books’ series, The Rational Male – Positive Masculinity. It’s about a month since its release now and I’ll admit it’s already exceeded my hopes and expectations. I know, everyone says that, but as I’ve learned, most authors struggle to match their earlier successes.

While this is still true of the first book (it still stands as the best seller and most popular) Positive Masculinity seems to resonate quite well with readers. I’ll admit I had some hesitation about focusing a quarter of the book on Red Pill Parenting, but this, it turns out, is exactly what’s catapulted it to a best seller in the Fatherhood and Parenting Boys sections on Amazon. For the initial four and a half weeks the book has held the number one best seller rank in Fatherhood and the number two and number five spot in  Parenting Boys. And for the first week and a half it held the number one best seller spot in Self Help.

At the risk of sounding like I’m glossing myself here, this is an incredible response when you consider the impact this book, written from a Red Pill perspective, might have in a mainstream reading world. It’s a great honor, but also a bit scary considering the social backlash of recent events. All the books continue to make inroads with men (and women) unfamiliar with Red Pill awareness, but the response to Positive Masculinity has been very promising so far. That said, the book is about much more than just parenting – which also adds to its overall appeal – so I’m hoping it will open some new eyes with regards to Red Pill awareness.

As things stand today, Sam Botta is finishing up the reading and mixing of the second book, Preventive Medicine. Sam is still struggling with medical complications due to his hit and run injuries (I’ll let him explain them in the comments), but the hope is still to have the Audible version of book two available in time for the 21 Convention at the end of September. For the audio of Positive Masculinity I’m still deciding as to whether I’ll do the read myself for this one, but my goal is to have it available in Q1 of 2018.

I should also add that the first book has seen its second retranslation. Beginning in Q4 The Rational Male will be available in Polish as well as the previous Korean version. I get a lot of readers asking for translations into Spanish and German (possibly Dutch too). This will be a priority for me in the coming year, so if you are a translator or know one who would like to partner with me to publish these translations please leave me a message on my About page.

Finally, I do have plans in the works to do a re-edit of the first book to address syntax, grammar and spelling issues. Contextually nothing will change, but once this revision is done I’ll be publishing a hardback version of The Rational Male through Barnes & Noble’s self-publishing format.

Blog Traffic

The blog continues to grow with regard to audience. 2016 had a slight decline from the previous year, and 2017 is on track to eclipse it, but the reach of The Rational Male still continues to grow.

I know Alexa.com isn’t the best metric, but it’s largely what most bloggers in the Manosphere use. These are the stats as of August 22, 2017 and I daresay these rankings are respectable for a Red Pill blog that’s never been monetized or advertised in six years. These numbers put me in good company amongst the most notable writers in the ‘sphere (as well as a few Purple Pill ‘life coaches’) and the blog continues to average just under half a million views per month. My general focus for the blog has always been as a delivery device for the message of Red Pill awareness, Game fundamentals and the unmoderated debate of intersexual dynamics. I’m pleased to see that in six years this discussion has proceeded in the same vein for all of them. Furthermore, I find it very encouraging when I’m told by Manosphere outsiders that The Rational Male is the best (sometimes their only) source for rational debate about Red Pill awareness and intersexual dynamics. I am not now, nor will I ever be interested in a Red Pill echo chamber/hug box and for six years the comment section has proven to be a ‘hot kitchen’ in which both critics and advocates can (largely) hash out the Red Pill details.

A lot has been made of free speech advocacy in the ‘sphere for a few years now. My stand has always been one about the free exchange of ideas. The only way an idea’s strength and merit can be tested is in the crucible of open debate. There are a great many Manosphere celebrities banging the gong about free speech who nonetheless block, edit and censor opinions they disagree with on their own forums. One purpose that this blog has is a free and open debate and (with the exception of spam and blatant trolling) will always be open to counterarguments.

The 21 Convention

As most of my regular readers are aware, I’ll be making my only in-person appearance at this year’s 21 Convention in Orlando, Florida, September 28 through October 1st. For more information on this event have a look at my rundown of it here. Furthermore, I’ve done a couple of interviews with 21 Convention founder Anthony Johnson about my participation and the talks I’ll be giving here and here.

If you haven’t made plans or purchased a weekend ticket I would encourage you to do so soon. The convention is getting close to being sold out, but if you have some issue with cost or you have some kind of hardship consideration and you really want to go, please contact myself or Anthony and we’ll work something out for you.

It bears repeating that I was less than enthusiastic about appearing not just publicly, but at this convention in particular. It’s always been my impression that the 21 Convention was a collection of largely Purple Pill dating coaches and not really in line with what (sometimes ugly) Red Pill awareness reveals to men. However, I’ve come to change my view of this convention in light of Anthony’s much more Red Pill focused line up for this 10th anniversary meet up. I’ll admit I had a hand in helping Anthony get what will amount to a Red Pill summit arranged. I really think this weekend will be a seminal event for Red Pill aware men and it’s my hope it will be something to help men change their lives.

This then is my very brief rundown of the 2016-2017 year for The Rational Male.

So here’s what I thought represents the best posts from year 6.

Let me know what your favorites were in the comments and let me know how TRM has helped you this year.

With humility and gratitude,

Rollo Tomassi

 

THE BEST OF THE RATIONAL MALE 2017

Interviews

Live with Obsidian & Alan Roger Currie

Mark Baxter, Ed Latimore & Rollo Tomassi

Anthony Johnson & Rollo Tomassi

Christian McQueen & Rollo Tomassi

Mark Baxter & Rollo Tomassi

 

Hypergamy

Stalling for Time

For Better or Worse

False Equivalencies

The Epiphany Phase Revisited

 

Series

The Reconstruction – I

The Reconstruction – II

The Reconstruction – III

The Reconstruction – IV

The Utility of Beta Men – I

The Utility of Beta Men – II

 

Social

The First Female President®  (Personal Favorite 2017)

Sexual Zoning

The Something Else

Transitioning

The Unbearable Rightness of Being Female

The Anger Bias

 

Red Pill / Game

Please, Breakup with Me

The Awareness

Submission

Confidence and the Safety Net  (Most Commented 2017)

Misperceptions of the Red Pill

 

Personal Development

Rites of Passage

Positive Masculinity

Teaching Slaves to Read

Family Integrity

Kill Your Idols

291 comments

  1. dr zipper
    “they’re not trying to destroy men, thru constant testing, they’re trying to find those men with dominance and leadership

    not every man make the cut”

    Once you know than you train with leadership and dominance (Faking dominance is virtually impossible in nature)

    Testing is her nature no choice is it comes up and the more you master the test and pass the more options life present itself.

    What happens the men who don;t make the cut?

  2. FR from moments ago

    Scene – airport bar. Next to attractive 40YO who is drinking a glass of red at counter, typing up RM story… She is chatting with older woman next to her. from the chat 40YO is in sales, selling IT sprockets to bigcos to SFA with in their organizations. Value add to society = nil. say her husband is…. wait for it… An undercover cop… Doggy ears perk up. Blah blah from them.

    Then older lady leaves. I’m considering talking to her when a dood blindsides her, whispers in her ear “is this seat taken” and she whips around to behold… Johnny Saleguy. 6’2″ trim, 32ish, deep voice, good hair. Johnny runs his arm around her shoulders as she squeees and eyes pop and gets up to hug him aggressively… “You’re on my flight!”… laughing and chatting. He sits next to her and says in his deep voice “ahhh I wanted to come up and fuck with you earlier but that lady got the seat”. They gossip about the flight, the office, the pipeline… He orders a Big Beer, she does the same… More chattering and laughing and what we would call in the field – kino’ing. All just good natured amirite? Obvious they get along well. won’t even say she is attracted to this guy, but she does enjoy his repartee… As they fly off back to the home office.

    How will this end? “You need a lift home?”… “Man I’m starving, grab a burger?”

    Who knows.

    But why? For what purpose? Sprockets? Shekels? Who is cooking the Fuzz’s dinner???

    [we stand behind our men in blue who keep us safe]

  3. Good thing not all working women fly around to business meetings and shit. Lol.

    I’m not really big on executrisses. Been around dozens of them, and of the ones that were married I always wondered ” who the fuck married you?”.

    Head of household. That’s your title period. If it’s becomes any kind of competition, you are on track for big losses. This is why having a working wife correctly is very much in line with RP.

    If you don’t understand what’s going on under the hood, it makes absolutely zero difference whether the wife works or not. If your frame becomes incapacitated in the face of hypergamy, the sahm will bang whoever flips her switches just as fast as any jet setting execubitch. Believe this.

    The determining factor will always be the man. If you understand ” burden “, you will just get this.

    Or, you could just try chaining her to a radiator to keep her isolated from all other swinging dicks on the planet, but that makes you a frameless kidnapper.

    Want a wife or great to remain loyal to you? Learn how to make her make herself loyal, alpha coworker/boss aside. If not, she might bang the grocery bagging dude in his studio apartment on a mattress on the floor before she picks the kids up from school.

    AR gets the vetting import. Failing this opens you up to every thrilling horrific adventure you never want to have.

    It’s never about them as much as it’s about you. You don’t compete with them, you don’t fear what they might do, you don’t try to control them as much as you get them to voluntarily control themselves, or your masculinity and frame makes all other options appear ludicrous.

    This is the normal order of things.

    And if she bucks, bristles and resists, and you move forward with her in spite of those bright warning billboards, then there is a mattress on the floor somewhere in your girl’s future, and you’ll probably be none the wiser.

    Now, I ask for the 50th time, Who’s fault is that?

  4. Blax

    All good “Be the man” stuff or as I would say Have Hand… But that’s still not the question.

    The question remains is there a RP evo psych bio case for a wife to work outside the home and lacking that… Have men just gone down the insidious path of the FI to the degree that they can’t even contemplate a wife not working as a sensible thing?

    Seems a 150 years ago… Or so. Being able to provide for a wife was a significant factor in getting hitched at all… Your prospects and such. And if she did work it was side by side scratching out a living on the farm…

    What are guys doing who pine for The Patriarchy 2.0 yet ship wifey off to make what? Enough for a beach vacation or that boat no one uses?

    Interesting.

  5. haven’t heard anyone here actually advocating for the wife working, mostly just acknowledging certain economic realities; besides, the question as you put it above to blax makes it seem like an either/or proposition when there may be other options (not that I have any suggestions, tho); maybe your point/question is…. would it be acceptable to you as a man if there were no economic reasons for her to work, but maybe more of the ‘not being bored’ or ‘career-ish’ motivations?

    in my case, I could keep us all in comfort but she kept a part time law practice on the side cherry picking clients/cases; keep in mind though, at tax time she always contributed less to our income than a full time minimum wage and usually worked from home; this might be a fairly different situation for most other folks, tho

    I never saw my particular situation as a blue pill capitulation to the FI, however; but maybe because my eyes are still adjusting

  6. “mostly just acknowledging certain economic realities;”

    See this is part of the BP And FI, same logic that drives ” buy a house with a mortgage” and “take out student loans”… Cuz u know you just HAVE to!

    All to weaken you.

  7. I can’t concede that the economic realities part is *always* not applicable, ie, it can’t always be BP/FI… I see where much of it is driven by a consumerist mindset and yes, we could all live with less gluttony and less living beyond our means

    but that aside, the ‘why’ a woman would still feel some need to be at an outside work environment when she doesn’t economically have to is….. driven by the hypergamous need to keep the dim fire of other options burning while she still has some doubt about the worthiness of her husband… still on the prowl whether she knows it or not

  8. @Pinelero

    Thanks for putting up the anatomy of female power. KFG had put this link up before and I read some of it,today I tried to buy it on amazon only to discover it has been banned in the us home of the first amendment.

    Downloaded now thanks again.

  9. Both Blax and Sentient make good points. I believe Sentient is merely pointing out why allow more things into your life that can go wrong. It’s sort of like would you want your wife or LTR to spend a lot of time on social media or go out with just the girls. If you want to control all aspects of her life and try to reign that in then you’re going to burn a lot of energy doing that.

    Social media is not going away, neither is women working. Seems like what it comes down to if you’re not already hitched or in an LTR is to vet very carefully. Otherwise deal with what you’ve got. As Blax pointed out your woman can stray just as easily with the grocery clerk or the trainer from the gym and end up banging him while you’re at work. It’s endless if you think of the possibilities when she is not with you. The kid’s teacher, the neighbor, her doctor, the contractor installing your hot tub, the hot waiter she met having lunch with girlfriends….and on and on.

    I went through that bit with the LTR being engrossed in social media and me getting all butthurt about it. It took a while but now I’m less interested in worrying about that. It can become an obsession if you are constantly checking her phone or worrying what she is doing when she is not with you. Then you have to wonder what the hell happened to your MPO.

    Girls are going to finger fuck Facebook for validation. They will have orbiters whether you want them to or not. What it comes down to are you going to let her know it bothers you? Is it girls being girls or is she banging an orbiter…endless hours and energy wasted on shit like that worrying. If she is DTF someone else it’s likely you won’t know she did it. If the signs are there it could be happening then you have to work on what is going wrong and fix it, or leave. That usually means fixing what you’re doing wrong, not fixing her. We all know we can’t fix women.

    So it seems like it does come down to our burden of performance. If you’re giving her tingles and satisfying her needs enough she is less likely to bang someone else. Right? It seems like a guy would be better off working on his own shit than trying to control his woman. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t lead their emotions, or have boundaries. It sure as fuck is harder to enforce boundaries and lead if you haven’t done so before, but it is possible to do so with enough work. Obviously at some point one has to judge whether there is still enough value in her after sex to keep her if it’s a constant battle. It’s also a sure tell that if there are constant battles you’re probably doing something wrong, I can speak to that myself.

  10. @Stuffin Box: “I tried to buy it on amazon only to discover it has been banned in the us home of the first amendment.”

    It is not, nor has it ever been, banned. It was simply never published in the US and is out of print in England and Nigeria, where it was only printed in small numbers. So used copies are rare on the market. It’s perfectly legal, if you can find one, to possess it. Piles of totally innocuous books share the same fate. Even some very good and highly respected books. It’s a market thing.

    The libraries of Yale, Cornell, Columbia and the City of NY have copies.

    It is “banned” to reproduce and distribute it because it is under copyright. It’s up to Chinweizu to make it available. As soon as he does so it will be “unbanned.”

  11. Roused

    I believe Sentient is merely pointing out why allow more things into your life that can go wrong. It’s sort of like would you want your wife or LTR to spend a lot of time on social media or go out with just the girls.

    It is fascinating how the FI has skewed even RP guys ideas of “what makes sense”.

    FI = [to paraphrase CH] Maximally restricting male sexuality while removing all restrictions from female sexuality… or something like that…

    And so we reflexively get to subtle shaming language…

    If you want to control all aspects of her life and try to reign that in then you’re going to burn a lot of energy doing that.

    The ever bad CONTROLLING…

    your woman can stray just as easily with the grocery clerk or the trainer from the gym and end up banging him while you’re at work

    Followed with a dose of fear…

    If she is DTF someone else it’s likely you won’t know she did it.

    Ending up with the old SHRUG – sorry bro, nothing you can do…

    Which paves the way for the FI to continue to push us down and away…

    Fascinating.

  12. Doc Z

    but that aside, the ‘why’ a woman would still feel some need to be at an outside work environment when she doesn’t economically have to is….. driven by the hypergamous need to keep the dim fire of other options burning while she still has some doubt about the worthiness of her husband… still on the prowl whether she knows it or not

    Yes there is a strong case to be made – for the other team…

    But guys, be a supportive spouse ya know?

  13. And so we reflexively get to subtle shaming language…

    If you want to control all aspects of her life and try to reign that in then you’re going to burn a lot of energy doing that.

    The ever bad CONTROLLING…

    My intent was not to shame anyone. It’s a personal choice on what you expend your energy and MPO on. Right?

    Controlling can be negative or positive, depends on the situation and how it’s applied. Sentient, you might have a situation where you’re better able to handle these things…perhaps I have more to learn…but I thought all this has been covered before and it all comes down to burden of performance.

    If she does fuck someone else (and you find out) what are your options? Walk away, or stay and be cucked. Is there a third option I’m missing?

  14. Roused

    I have no doubt you did not have a conscious intent… that is my point. How subtle and deeply ingrained this whole idea has become… where men reflexively adopt a defensive position to women working…

    Sentient, you might have a situation where you’re better able to handle these things…

    This isn’t really about me… but to demonstrate my wife worked for 3 months after we were married. This was when I was 24 and had a kid on the way and had no money and limited income. And she stopped her clerical job to be a mom right then. So the next obvious thing to do was quit my job and start a business… lol. And yeah we went without a lot of stuff for years… Had one car etc. Don’t take money to make these choices.

    it all comes down to burden of performance.

    True… my point is to make men aware on the front end… so to ease said burden. BEFORE you marry, get this ironed out. This is the only way Patriarchy 2.0 is going to go down.

  15. Option #1 never get married in the first place.
    #2 if married never loose frame.
    #3 once frame is lost pay consequences.

  16. JP the kitchen is her domain,let her have it for christ sakes.

    Don’t unpack it,she is fuckin nuts,leave it alone,hopefully a genius like JP has vetted well and this is the best he could find,get used to it.

    A womans brain gets imprinted by her experience,together with her biological predisposition for certain things,like a bitch dog that once she has a litter her whole personality changes and she becomes vicious selfish and controlling get used to it.

    Egalitarian Equalism is a myth.

    Next you know JP’s wife will be a victim of his constant analysing her and caring too much.

  17. LOL on the current topic of discussion.

    The wife working or not depends on circumstances. And might be arbitrary depending on those circumstances.

    I think the argument is like: “should I eat macaroni salad with a fork or a spoon. Or perhaps a knife”. Depends on a persons skill level and personal feelings about the experience.

    That beings said, I’d work extra to have a wife stay home and raise the children as best as possible in a Dr. Laura Schlessinger kind of way. She’s into red pill parenting with a mother and father being complementary but different.

    (As an aside, one of the other wealthy dads asked my wife why I don’t come poolside at the country club at all. He misses talking with me. He’s wealthy and has a HB9 wife. I’ve been spending time at my wildlife habitat farm instead of poolside. My wife mentioned this, and as I had seen his son for an acne visit with the mom/wife before and the 14 year old looked squirmingly uncomfortable during that visit, I mentioned that he probably needs fathering advice for his sons. My wife came back with: “what could you possibly tell him?” “I raised our son by myself” referring to her SAHM and my non-helicopter fathering approach. My response?: “Right”. Then: “80% of fathering is not fucking up your child.” My resources of support being totally overlooked. And the kids turned out admirable. I don’t discount my wife’s effort of course. She did real good.)

    That being said, my wife was polishing up her resume yesterday to go back to work in an empty nest scenario. She otherwise spends her time socializing these days including 3 days a week at the country club in the summer. I don’t mind if she makes some cash as a registered nurse.

    She was whining about me not giving myself a paycheck this past month because the business money went to the business 401K safe harbor match at work to the tune of $20K.

    I’ve had a Machiavellian scheme going on lately where I stay cash flow poor, but book wealth rich. I scheme. She squirms in a comfortable lifestyle. To restrict female frivorce tendencies and maximize my power and hand. Go figure. Some of this stuff is capable of being figured.

    Prescriptive advice for you? Not hardly.

  18. As for the statue deal, going to be funny when they have to start pulling down statues of black slave owners. Or MLK has to go because he wasn’t fond of tye gays marrying

    I’d start agitating for that right now if I was better at sort of thing just to fuck with them. Well that and I don’t want to see their monuments pulled down. That’s some straight up Taliban type shit right there

    And they will really shit bricks when it comes to monuments put up by former slaves to honor the folks who owned them and cared for them etc etc.

    History is a real twisted bitch and the statue deal will get extra twisted.

  19. First time poster, long-time reader, throughout the last two years of a disintegrating relationship (no marriage, one son), which ended a year ago… Where shall I post questions? Here? Field reports?

  20. Thanks Rollo, for all of your work. Like most here, I’ve been connecting that dots over the years, just not as well and not as industriously as you. Thank you.

  21. @Rugby11 Re: Neurofeedback video… Neurofeedback (administered by Rachel Ragsdale in Denver, CO) has been the least invasive among the mix of effective medical breakthroughs that are the reason the narration of “The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine (Volume 2)” audiobook will be available on Audible before The 21 Convention.

  22. @ Roused and Sentient

    …. and anyone else that can get anything from it.

    I’m never going to explain to a woman that she’s doing something that I don’t like or care for, at least not outright verbally. Observe them closely as their words combined with their actions will give you a very clear picture of who they are. What’s the real time variance between word and deed?

    I used to disagree with yareally ‘s pronouncements that all girls at a certain age can’t ever, under any circumstances, become untethered from endless social media bullshit ( along with the mandatory 10,000 orbiters that come with it. ). I still stand by my objections, but also concede that social media use is a problem of epic proportions for our society as a whole.

    If a man where to just accept the notion that this circumstance is the new normal, then it follows that a great measure of discernment on the part of the man will tend to vaporize.

    I’m at the shore this week, maxing and relaxing with the fam and a few friends, and some very interesting things are happening all around, and I’m taking it all in via a nicely aged pair of RP industrial goggles. Maybe I’ll expand on that later, but I’ll say that I wish most of you guys were here. There are dozens of young imports working for the summer on the boardwalk and the majority of them are very attractive with a good amount of real smokers in the bunch.

    Ok, enough young gal talk. The point I’m trying to make is what we all agree on already – AWALT is the order of the day. But like always my caveat is to impress upon guys that AWALT is always by degrees.

    Back to the working wife thing, I get sentient’s question of ” why ” because the motivation to accept a wife working outside the home is important. But sometimes, regardless of what a man may want to do ideally, both people in a marriage may be required to work, not to buy more stuff, but to just survive. Sentient got a very short term taste of this. For some couples, it can take a lot longer.

    The mechanics of having a working wife are the same regardless. You’re never economically backed into a corner that forces you to think that everything, including your wife working, is beyond your control fully.

    Vet, vet, vet.

    I have encountered an even dozen hb8 and higher women that just were not what I considered marriage material for me, regardless of what all of my male friends thought, or how much they questioned my sanity. Lol, and none of the girls I’m referring to where strippers. Strippers have a different category.

    Hb9 Donna, investment banking/hedge funding super execubitch fuck buddy and dear friend. Earnings = high 7 figures annually. Model-like natural good looks ( a hotter Gina Reschon..is that her name ? ). We loved each other’s company, had mad sexual chemistry and compatibility, and we’d each jump into a raging fire to save the other, no doubt.

    Given all of that, she was a woman that would have had the highest potential and probability of cheating on me. It had nothing to do with money or her job or alphas being around or her good looks/killer bod.

    It was something in her personality/character. I saw giant flashes of it over the years. Just flashes. It was a gambling type of impulsivity that served her well in going from a bullshit business academy to Wall Street.

    When breaching the subject of ” getting more serious ” and possibly ” taking the next step ” ( lol ), she came right out with what was supposed to be some kind of joke ( but was a cautionary note in my head instead ) – ” if we get married and for whatever reason it bombs and fails, you are looking at a killer windfall “.

    Jokes like that are funny as long as they never, ever come from a potential wife. Especially not her. She did love me a lot, far as I could tell anyway, but her mental idea of love and marriage were vastly different, and that’s okay… as long as I never lose my head and even consider marrying her. She wasn’t a bad person at all, but she wasn’t truly wife material. At least not for me. I’d actually marry or seriously date a counter girl at Starbucks with the proper mental mindset. ( she’d have to be a minimum hb7 though…lol )

    And that’s too bad, and all that shit, but she was who she was, and I was who I was, and that’s all there is to it.

    Vet, vet, vet.

    It’s possible, even though AWALT, to have a wife or ltr that works or doesn’t work, and not have it negatively impact the quality of your life. To get what you want takes time, patience and skill. Just like fishing and hunting and building a log cabin.

    The more exact your requirements, the greater the odds are of not getting that. Not impossible, but you can’t shortcut your way to it.

    Now, once more into the Atlantic.

    Later you wonderful bunch of mofos!!!!!

  23. To be Red Pill is to recognize that though women are fully capable of rational thought, that is not their default setting. Any Red Pill man who vets a woman with the intention to marry her does so fully aware that if an opprtunity her hypergamy cant pass up presents itself, she will take it on and hamster it away after the deed. He will never find out.

  24. All a man can do is try to place things such he makes himself as much of a hypergamous optimal he can, and as much as he can minimize occurence of other opprtunities.

  25. “Sentient”

    Repeating a question that has already been answered:
    RP case for wife working.

    Platinum rule. Good enough for you? Probably not.

    Ok, more words:
    If a man deems that his Mission requires his woman to work outside the home for money, then he should make it so within his own parameters of safety. Vetting, full evaluation of his Mission, re-evaluation when he deems it necessary, etc. and who are you to tell him otherwise? Starting up the first Church of Sentient, maybe?

    Your solipsism, your “mah way is th’ ONLY RAHT way!” is showing. It’s one of your bad habits.
    In this case, either you reject the Platinum rule for other men, or you make the ridiculous claim to being the sole man who gets to define what Platinum means. Concretely it means you should be telling Ton one of his girls must quit her job ASAP. Good luck with that, Sentient.

    Have yourself a good little time untangling the knot you’ve tied around yourself.

  26. Rollo,

    For what ever reason, your second book does not link to your authors page on amazon. It might be worth fixing amazon gives you the tools to do so.

  27. QUESTION

    I believe that one of the main ways that male’s jockey for status with one another, beating down their fellow male into a supplicating beta orientation, is by making commands.

    How do you deal with an alpha who AMOG’s you by saying “do this. do this. do this”?

  28. How do you deal with an alpha who AMOG’s you by saying “do this. do this. do this”?

    “No thanks, you do it”, is one option. Probably won’t end right there though, so keep that in mind. Lots of men here know how to deal with an issue like that, but they’ll need a little more info if you’re really looking for advice.

    Good one Rugby.

  29. Tom

    No one, be it and alpha or any other male, can make you ever do anything without a great measure of cooperation from you.

    Just think about that for a while and let it sink in.

    Guys can say whatever they want. It’s just words until it becomes a threat. Words are words. A command that’s ignored or rejected is just words that fall flat.

    Conceding that another man is somehow better without him having proven it to you in some manner is a suckers game. Don’t ever play.

    Don’t let ” social status ” mean more to you than your own mental point of origin, meaning that your bottom line is always about your best interest. Never volunteer to lower your own ” status “.

    Let them command and amog all they want. You continue on unfettered and giving no heartfelt fucked

  30. If I had my tablet handy, I’d post up the ” get your shinebox ” scene from Goodfellas….. or even the ” funny how?” Scene.

  31. Hello. I’ve noticed that the website “the rawness” has been taken down. Does anyone have a copy of the articles that could be shared? It was really insightful stuff. Thanks in advance.

  32. Hello Gentlemen,

    It’s good to be back here reading your insightful, intelligent, funny, actionable posts. I’ve been away for awhile. Glad to see Rollo’s blog and books doing so well. Congratulations sir, and I sincerely thank you from the bottom of my purple-but-slowly-turning-red heart for your work. I am now eating my previous words about this being ideological and cult-like. lol. Some might remember that I was the eponymous subject of one of Rollo’s posts on purple pill, and the ensuing discussion about whether I was setting myself up for slaughter in marrying a Ukrainian I’d met online. I (basically) said I’m a big boy now at 50, and know what I’m doing with women, and would let ya’ll know how it worked out. Not that anyone gives a rat’s ass after all my bullshit, but whatever, here I am.

    Funny thing is that I’d been thinking about posting this update a few days ago, after reconnecting with TRM blog, and I would have said something along the lines of: she has been here almost 9 months, we been married for 5, going reasonably well, regular and enjoyable sex, she cooks everything from scratch and takes good care of me and the house; she’s diligently studying english, meeting people, etc, seems mostly happy; without fail she packs my lunch every night – once she woke up at about 1 am and remembered she had not made my lunch for work next day, and even though I told her not to worry about it, she got up, and went downstairs and *cooked* me lunch. Her responsibility, she said. She also genuinely likes me, and is very loving and affectionate and passionate in bed. We’ve had some conflict, and I’ve mostly held my ground, but made some fairly key concessions in the spirit of playing fair (since she has, in actuality at this point, zero leverage in this relationship), and accommodating her wants and needs.

    And hypergamy doesn’t give a fuck.

    Lo and behold, yesterday the computer is open and I see a ‘Hi’ come across the screen from Skype from a male. Open the Skype window and she’s been chatting with this dude from New Hampshire or some shit, not long, but the kind of bare bones swapping of details – the guy’s on hunt for a wife, and she’s asking about the size of his town, and what’s the weather like, how many kids, etc. As the blood drains from my face, the veil parts, I see it for what it is, and I realize without a shadow of a doubt, this shit is real. Complete with the subsequent hamstering and total lack of accountability following.

    I don’t believe she was actually interacting with this guy with any conscious intent to find someone else, but clearly she thinks about it, and is willing to “play” with the idea, even at a time when she has sooo much to lose. I could withdraw my petition to get her a green card in two seconds, and she’s done. I think she was/is bored and enjoys the attention and validation, and sense of (diminishing) power that she has over men.

    So now I need to figure out what to do. i am beyond grateful for Rollo’s work, this blog, and forum, and having internalized RP to the limited extent that I have, and know I need to do ALOT more. It’s pretty humbling to be 50 and need to be totally schooled in something so basic. It’s fricking amazing that I have managed to hide myself from this knowledge for so long.

    Thank you.

  33. I meant to also say that I have learned a ton from you guys, and really appreciate the time and energy that many of you spent last fall trying to get me to get my head out of my ass. What can I say, I need to learn the hard way. Truth is, though, you guys were so vehement about it, that it definitely helped me to keep myself in reserve and react a bit more strategically to her.

  34. @Mitch – welcome back. I didn’t engage much with you last fall but I remember the discussion well.

    I’m sure others with more relevant experience will be along soon with more actionable advice (although even I can tell you you should probably see a divorce lawyer just with a view to protecting yourself as much as possible and to know your options – and take this as a wake up call to know you have to improve yourself to be the man you need to be to lead your marriage – assuming you want to make this work instead of just dumping her – after all you need to walk the path of self improvement anyway or you’ll run into this problem with any woman you date).

    But mostly I just wanted to post to say that it is rare to see someone with the emotional honesty to accept they were wrong and actually come back willing to learn with an open mind – if you keep this up and *take action * you will be fine.

    Have you read the Married Man Sex Life Primer from2011? I have heard here it is a good outline of concepts from before Athol Kay went purple pill. And Sentient HABD and others have given good advice to married guys here which will be useful for you – check out the Field Reports thread – it’s not just young men in night clubs.

  35. Mitch

    welcome back…

    I’ve mostly held my ground, but made some fairly key concessions in the spirit of playing fair

    Such as what? describe these “concessions” [danger word right there… lol]

    she has, in actuality at this point, zero leverage in this relationship

    LOL. Contract negotiation? she clearly has the means to leverage her pussy… errr… position.

    I don’t believe she was actually interacting with this guy with any conscious intent to find someone else,

    Irrelevant whether it was conscious or unconscious… result is the same.

    but clearly she thinks about it, and is willing to “play” with the idea,

    Uh yeah… it was her idea to sell herself online all along… You speshul?

    even at a time when she has sooo much to lose.

    Lose? What? You? LOL. Dude you paid to get her out of Dodge and TO the promised land. You made her monkey branching 10 times easier… and free to her…

    I could withdraw my petition to get her a green card in two seconds, and she’s done.

    Hahahaha. sure she is. worst case another simp will be along any minute…

    I think she was/is bored and enjoys the attention and validation,

    Don’t worry some guy will be along soon to rationalize that she needed to fill her idle time… and it’s totally RP to have your wife on social media… He won’t however be able to make a evo psych bio case for why this is in your interests… lol.

    So now I need to figure out what to do.

    You KNOW what to do… this whole set up is based on her getting a green card and cash… Never had anything to do with you… The long con my friend.

    Take that Red Pill allllllllllllllll the way down.

    Good luck.

  36. @Mitch

    “I don’t believe she was actually interacting with this guy with any conscious intent to find someone else, but clearly she thinks about it.”

    She at this point has,figured you out,what she can get away with,and is looking to maximize her options,on a conscious level,what she may not have done is made a decision YET.

    You need to take measures now to cover your ass,and move her out.Keep in mind that everything she says and does is designed to keep you in check ,in the dark.

    You need to look at this woman like a serial monogamist that has one intent ,to fuck her way to the top of the survival ladder and once started there will never be enough.

  37. Tom

    How do you deal with an alpha who AMOG’s you by saying “do this. do this. do this”?

    Give some examples… from just this snippet… It’s probably not an alpha saying this…

  38. Mitch

    On the whole EE mail order bride thing… here is a snippet of a FR you might find interesting…

    So I’m amused like OK here we go let’s see how long it takes for her pitch etc. But I can spend some time hanging with what turns out to be a true 29yo EE model. So we get to chatting and my frame is like granite she is a nobody to be physically…lol.

    I am in full yeah your pretty thats cool but what else ya got mode. And she is loving it. We get into an hour convo. Basically she auctioned herself off at 19 on a EE bride website… So this is fascinating… She was cooly calibrated but still so feminine and and open. I am all RP interested in this whole deal and am laughing at the stories of gifts and flowers and cases of champagne arriving at her family’s flat in a little town in EE… Centimillionaires from Switzerland and other places jetting in to meet her parents. Crazy stories… She picks an American who comes to visit her 7 times and is very nice and agreeable… To her dream of not cooking, cleaning and becoming a model.

    So she does. Comes here marries dude. Spends most of her time in NYC by herslef working her modeling career. Which is legit 6 figure a year… Billboards in Times Square… Friends with Steve Lyon…lol. And a few movie roles from real movies. So i am into her story. She is pulling my arm everytime I look away as she tells this stuff and is staring into my eyes from 5 inches most of the time. So the optics from the rest of the bar are great. I see several women from my event lookimg over and I play some eye game with 3 escorts I spot are circling like vultures… One of them I smirk at like ” yeh check this girl on my arm out” and she gives me a short golf clap. Lol.

    We have another drink some more back and forth convo… I tell her i am genuinely impressed with her spirit and business savvy. Oh the dude she married, yeah they divorced after 4 years because he did not want to move to NYC… Don’t feel bad for him he is now marrying a Colombian mail order bride.

    https://therationalmale.com/field-reports/comment-page-11/#comment-191454

  39. Sentient
    Weaponized Altruism…
    Didn’t think of it that way.

    Suppose if guilt and shame or virtue signaling is involved than it’s being a white knight

  40. I am glad that TRM is going strong, and I would like to thank Rollo and all the regular commenters here for their contributions. Both posts and comments have been very important for me this summer.

  41. and take this as a wake up call to know you have to improve yourself to be the man you need to be to lead your marriage – assuming you want to make this work instead of just dumping her – after all you need to walk the path of self improvement anyway or you’ll run into this problem with any woman you date)

    Culum, thanks, that’s exactly it. I realize now that my looking in EE for a woman was partly about me taking a shortcut to getting a hot woman, not wanting to put in the work to become the man that easily attracts them. i say partly, because really my main goal was to find a more traditionally-minded woman, and the ones I met here in the states I was never interested in. Actually, there was one, but knew from the beginning that was a no-go for unrelated reasons.

    @stuffin:

    She at this point has, figured you out,what she can get away with,and is looking to maximize her options,on a conscious level,what she may not have done is made a decision YET…..

    You need to look at this woman like a serial monogamist that has one intent ,to fuck her way to the top of the survival ladder and once started there will never be enough.

    Yep! Though I also believe that she is not conscious of this. She comes from a very good family – good as in parents and brother and adult son are really good people and alot of mutual love and respect. Religious, too. She goes to her slavic church and reads her bible every day. So there are a lot of constraining psychological factors, but I have seen her hamster in action, and wow, frankly I have never seen anything quite like it. Unlike western women, she doesn’t even *try* to be logical, or care that she is not. She is a woman, after all (she will say). And she takes that perogative as far as she possibly can.

    @Sentient:

    Hard medicine, that pill is bitter. But that’s why I came back here. My achilles heel I think is that I am fairly high on empathy. While I don’t want to kill that (not sure I could, even if I wanted to), I need to keep it in check, and learn how to administer some discipline. Even saying these words is very weird to me, because it goes against everything I have understood and believed about the nature of women, and I am lately reinterpreting a lot of my family history through a RP lens. I know I have some latent natural leadership abilities, (I don’t think I’m a natural alpha at all, tho) but I have done very little in my life to cultivate them, mostly I have not wanted to be bothered. Taking the easy road, with the least amount of friction. What I am finally starting to get is that there is no escape. I think she can be tamed, and I believe she desperately wants to be tamed. I just need to learn how, and I’ve got quite a challenge in her. Now that I think about it, that is exactly what drew me to her. The online photo that got me was of her looking absolutely feminine and stunning, with an expression full of steely strength and smoldering passion that said “I dare you to take this on.”

    Thank you guys for being here. You’re life-savers – literally.

  42. @Mitch, when is the last time you drove home from work, turned your vehicle off and said, “Thanks for getting me home today”?

    Answer: you haven’t. And once you realize that as far as hypergamy is concerned, we are no different than a utility, a vehicle to get women places.

    You think she gives a rat’s ass about all the stuff you’re able to provide her?

    You think her cooking all these meals is traditional femininity instead of it being putting oil in her vehicle (that vehicle being you)?

    You think you can outsmart hypergamy after you gave it power over half your shit?

    Abort! immediately!

  43. Mitch

    So there are a lot of constraining psychological factors,

    Yes – but on your side…

    If she sucks another guy’s cock – but does so in a traditionally feminine way – that matter?

  44. mitch – respect for coming back here and being so brutally honest about yourself; it’s difficult to show up, drop your pants and let everyone have a turn at you… the anonymity here is what makes that possible for many men, me included

    having a high empathy level can be crippling for a man, it’s been that way for me anyway; I’m usually very sensitive to another’s feelings and have at times made choices that were more for the other person’s feelings/needs than what was best for me; it’ll be used against you unless you keep it in a cage, and only let it out for those worthy of it

    blax had line about making yourself such a badass to her that any other options seem ludicrous…. if you want to save the ltr, then that’s the overall strategy; she doesn’t currently view you as her best option, just the best right now; fix that, or jettison her before it’s too late… then just work on yourself w/out the pressure of repairing your plane in mid-flight

  45. Mitch Rugby

    “The online photo that got me was of her looking absolutely feminine and stunning, with an expression full of steely strength and smoldering passion that said “I dare you to take this on.””

    https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/movie_script.php?movie=philadelphia-story-the


    Dexter: But whatever he is, toots,
    you’ll have to stick.
    – He’ll give you no out as I did.
    Tracy: – I won’t require one.
    Dexter: I suppose you’d still be attractive
    to any man of spirit, though.
    There’s something engaging about it,
    this “goddess” business…
    something more challenging to the male
    than the more obvious charms.
    Tracy: – Really?
    Dexter: – Really.
    We’re very vain, you know.
    “This citadel can and shall be taken,
    and I’m the boy to do it.”

    So whose this “love” all about really Mitch? Who is validating whom?

  46. I’m usually very sensitive to another’s feelings and have at times made choices that were more for the other person’s feelings/needs than what was best for me; it’ll be used against you unless you keep it in a cage, and only let it out for those worthy of it

    In a covert contract world of dog logic… this is how things go down… The Golden Rule is what?

  47. @Mitch

    “Yep! Though I also believe that she is not conscious of this.”

    She is conscious enough to be in contact electronically (that you know of) skype (they know what each other looks like) and maybe more.

    “She comes from a very good family – good as in parents and brother and adult son are really good people and alot of mutual love and respect”.

    Her good family was brought up in a different era, without skype and mail order brides.Just the fact that she has an adult son points to a number of things like failed relationship,hitting the wall,already tried everything and looking to optimize her future, doesn’t need a man for love rather for goods.

    ” Religious, too. She goes to her slavic church and reads her bible every day. So there are a lot of constraining psychological factors”

    So did and do both of my sisters both on their 4th time around,with the road behind strewn with miserable and broken men. There are no I repeat absolutly none restraining psychological factors for a woman none,other than what you put there yourself. I can see that you don’t want to offend her and are unlikely to call her to the mat for this shit or have hand and dominate.

    ” but I have seen her hamster in action, and wow, frankly I have never seen anything quite like it. Unlike western women, she doesn’t even *try* to be logical, or care that she is not. She is a woman, after all (she will say). And she takes that perogative as far as she possibly can.”

    ^^^This is the rule of the relationship^^^ And western women are just the same!

  48. You see Mitch speaking as a good promise keeping family man,my best option for mom ,sisters, daughters is to get them married off to a good responsible promise keeping family man.

    “Preventive Medicine”maps out the rest of the psychology that the brides have.

  49. ” Not that anyone gives a rat’s ass after all my bullshit . . .”

    You’re wrong about this, as well.

    “I don’t believe she was actually interacting with this guy with any conscious intent to find someone else, but . . .”

    . . . a woman’s sexual strategy relies on deceit and manipulation. To an extent that she must deceive and manipulate herself for it to work. She must believe what she says, at the time she says it for the hamster behind the curtain not to become visible to her target, so it must remain, to some extent invisible to herself.

    Should she become seen as a hard nosed gold digger the batting of eyelashes will repulse, rather than enchant.

    ” . . . she takes that perogative as far as she possibly can.”

    And, as per above, it is her prerogative, as far as she can take it.

    However, the hamster that women are trying to keep hidden behind the curtain is that the interaction between men and women is a balance of powers. What women want is for men to say “Oh. Right. Your prerogative. Yes dear.” For men to cede their power. But the balance of powers means that there is another part to the equation, that men have a prerogative as well:

    To keep women’s prerogative in check.

    The guys that support a mast straight must, in order to fulfil their function, oppose each other, but with equal force. That is the natural form of equality. An equality that doesn’t “care” about individuals (fibers in the guy), only across the population (the integrity of the guy as a unit).

    Now you have some lumps to take. It will actually aid you in taking them to bear in mind that you earned them.

  50. “What women want is for men to say “Oh. Right. Your prerogative. Yes dear.”

    Until he does this^ then it is dead bedroom and shit tests galore until the next possible optimisation of hypergamy.

  51. @Stuffin Box:

    Swedish Women 2016:

    We’re not your women. We don’t want your protection.

    Swedish Women 2017:

    Where have all the Swedish men gone? Do they mean to leave us without protection?

  52. for those interested in the clip above

    also “The Philadelphia Story” [not the petition to remove Frank Rizzo’s statue] is an outstanding red pill film. Highly recommend for this, beyond the glimpse of part of America that has nearly been eradicated [Main Line, manner of speaking, carriage, etc.].

    “I’m going to build you an ivory tower with my own two hands”

    “Golly! … golly… moses…”

  53. dr zipper
    “having a high empathy level can be crippling for a man, it’s been that way for me anyway; I’m usually very sensitive to another’s feelings and have at times made choices that were more for the other person’s feelings/needs than what was best for me; it’ll be used against you unless you keep it in a cage, and only let it out for those worthy of it”

    Very true for me… It gets worse if you do not learn how this will harm you with age…

    newlyaloof
    https://www.scribd.com/document/317641132/Sex-God-Method-2nd-Edition-pdf
    http://bit.ly/2wWRWYS

    kfg
    Protection is a virtue that is observably giving to those in need but closer to keen….

    Sentient
    Film is a great medium is exchange these ideals in human relationships.

  54. Mitch
    So now I need to figure out what to do.

    FIrst off, good on you for returning. A lot of men would be too proud or afraid of criticism to do that. Second, welcome back.

    Don’t panic. Do. Not. Panic. Don’t get butthurt, either. If you want this thing to stay intact, panic and/or butthurt will not work. If you are going to send her back, that decision needs to be made in a calm mindset, so again panic / butthurt are negatives.

    Now then, if she’s Skyping like that there’s hypergamous branch swinging in the air. Before I look at other men’s responses, what were these concessions? Where and how did you let her bend your Frame around? Without too much info – no self-doxxing – the details would help.

    You may already be screwed, but maybe you can salvage this. Depends on what you want.

  55. “Sentient”
    Don’t worry some guy will be along soon to rationalize that she needed to fill her idle time… and it’s totally RP to have your wife on social media… He won’t however be able to make a evo psych bio case for why this is in your interests… lol.

    LOL @ your butthurt.

    Get busy telling Ton and Blaximus “Yer not doin’ it my way YER DOING IT RONG!”.
    Yeah, you’ll do that real soon.

  56. A little difficult to say welcome back Mitch. Your the one one that brought me from lurker to commenter. There are no unicorns you was warned and now it’s oh shit what have I got my self into ? I told you about my friend that went to China and got a wife and 6 months later he’s trying to sell her to me for a discount. He just want to recoup his money so he can go back and buy the perfect unicorn. Well I think I told you about it anyway. Good luck and thank you. You got big balls for being a life example for red pill men. I’m starting to think your more red than purple.

  57. On 08/28, I received a “teaser-come-back-and-see-us-facebook-style” email from Linkedin. The subject line: “Here’s why you need a work spouse.” Opening the email there is a picture of a black man wearing eyeglasses and speaking while gesturing with his left hand showing a wedding ring while not making eye contact with the woman. The plain-looking white woman, above and to his right is watching him while holding an iPad. The caption reads, “Half of employees who had a ‘work spouse’ felt more strongly connected to their company.”

    Now from a red-pill perspective, the “work spouse” part and the more connected to the company part would both be disadvantageous. I didn’t bother to log into Linkedin to read the article, as the image said everything.

  58. @ Rugby11

    Sometimes when I feel I have a pretty lousy job, I remember the people who must clear the venues of the sleeping and comotose individuals who sat through an entire Sarah McLachlan concert. Then, I feel somewhat better.

  59. AR

    LOL @ your butthurt.

    Get busy telling Ton and Blaximus “Yer not doin’ it my way YER DOING IT RONG!”.
    Yeah, you’ll do that real soon.

    Well to even register butthurt one would have to be wrong. Since I’m not, there is no chance of that happening (despite the fact it wouldn’t happen anyway because “That’s who I am and your… nothing.”).

    The challenge was is there a RP case (evo bio psych case) for a woman to work outside the home and we got back:

    1. Crickets.
    2. Defensive rationalizing with a side of shaming.
    3. Blax’s very good example of HOW to handle that situation, but not a RP case FOR it…
    4. Your attempt which you admit missed the mark.

    So the point stands.

    As to this “it means you should be telling Ton one of his girls must quit her job ASAP. Good luck with that, Sentient.

    Did Ton get remarried? Sorry Ton didn’t send a gift.

    In this case, either you reject the Platinum rule for other men, or you make the ridiculous claim to being the sole man who gets to define what Platinum means.

    The Platinum Rule [do what you want to do when you want to do it] is a means to happiness and freedom. It does not mean you wont face consequences of your actions…

    Roused got it… He’s a smart dude.

    Both Blax and Sentient make good points. I believe Sentient is merely pointing out why allow more things into your life that can go wrong. It’s sort of like would you want your wife or LTR to spend a lot of time on social media or go out with just the girls.

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