Transitioning

As most of my readers know I’m presently editing the final draft of my third book. A very large part, almost a third, of this new book will be dedicated to Red Pill Parenting. I’ve written several series-posts about parenting from a Red Pill perspective and I felt it was an important enough topic to deserve a category itself in my sidebar links. I’ve expanded significantly upon these essays in the book as well as adding more material and some general advice for Red Pill aware men in their parenting efforts.

One thing I’m asked of from men who are Red Pill aware fathers is what to look out for and what to apply themselves to in raising a son or daughter using a Red Pill Lens. While prospectively it will give women some parenting insights, I’ve written this section with the intent of informing men about what they can expect from a feminine-primary social bent on conditioning a man’s children to assimilate to a Blue Pill mindset.

Without giving too much away, I’ve tried to express the dangers of a system of feminine-primary acculturation that contributes to what we term ‘Blue Pill Conditioning’ in the manosphere. What defines a ‘Blue Pill‘ mindset means different things to different men, but what conditions him to literally think, and invest his ego into that feminine-primary identification is initiated at a very early age. One thing I think gets lost on guys becoming Red Pill aware is just how much of his very natural-feeling sense of self is the result of a conditioning that’s taken the better part of his lifetime to develop in him.

The main reason I began developing a Red Pill parenting dialog is because it’s vitally necessary for Red Pill fathers – really any father with a sense of conventional masculinity – to come to terms with how his sons’ and daughters’ upbringing will be defined by what I call ‘The Village’ in the book. I coined this from the popular meme that “it takes a village to raise a child”, and the Village we have today is one that is dead set on instilling and normalizing a state of deliberate gender confusion – and hopefully perpetuate that state into a person’s adulthood.

The Village

This Village is a catch-all term and I mean to have it represent all of the influences a child receives in its upbringing that contributes to its Blue Pill sense of self. This includes the influences of media, popular entertainment, academia, their pre and grammar school education, popular culture that actively seeks to instill its own ideological base, etc. These are fairly recognizable sources of the Village’s systemic influence, but it’s also important to understand that this influence will be reinforced by your child’s peers, their Village family and relatives.

‘The Village’ will raise your kids if you don’t. You will be resisted, you will be ridiculed, you will be accused of every thought-crime to the point of being dragged away to jail for imparting Red Pill awareness to them (in the future I expect it to be equated with child abuse). The Village will teach your boys from the most impressionable ages (5 years old) to loath their maleness, to feel shame for being less perfect than girls and to want to remake their gender-identity more like girls – to the point that transitioning their gender to girls’ will be the norm.

The Village will raise your daughters to perpetuate the same cycle that devalues conventional masculinity, the same cycle that considers a father’s presence as superfluous and their sacrifices as granted expectations. It will raise your daughters to over-inflate their sense of worth with unmerited confidence at the expense of boys as their foils. It will teach them to openly embrace Hypergamy as their highest personal authority (publicly and privately) and to disrespect anything resembling masculinity to be less than some silly anachronism or reverse it into being all about men’s insecurities.

The good news is that for all of these efforts in social engineering, the Feminine Imperative is still confounded by basic biology and the psychological firmware evolved into us over millennia. That basic root reality is your greatest advantage as a father. If there’s one underlying truth upon which to base your parenting it’s this; children are still motivated by evolved influences that are relatively predictable. Begin from the root truth that we evolved our psychology and our behaviors from intergender complementarity that made us the preeminent species on this planet. It takes a global Village to distort this by teaching failed notions of egalitarian equalism.

Useful Tools – Blue Pill Fathers

Although the Village would assert its influence to be the primary one in your child’s life, and although it would have women believe that father’s are both necessary when convenient and superfluous, father’s are not without their uses. The Feminine Imperative (by way of the social system of the Village) needs fathers to help reinforce its feminine-primary influence in their children’s lives. Thus, Blue Pill fathers must also carry the feminine-primary water in their parenting. They must be taught to believe that parenting a daughter is preferable to parenting a son:

I realize that everything I could do with a boy I can do with my daughters (i.e. play basketball, teach them how to throw a punch, and play in the dirt). Yes, I know that’s a big fat “duh” for many of you, but I’m a recovering knucklehead with minimal relapses, so please humor me. And yes, I’m going to teach them much more than those three things – but I promise you that I will teach them those three things.

The Feminine Imperative needs men to constantly reaffirm the fallacies of egalitarian equalism, but it is The Village that needs a father to instill them into the minds of their own flesh and blood as well as those of other fathers. The meme is always a pretense of gender-neutral equity, but the latent purpose is one of devaluing the very existence of boys, and, by extension, conventional masculinity.

And this is the crux of the effort to enlist fathers in the system of the Village; masculinity and maleness are always portrayed as problems to be solved – the solution always being more feminine identification. The main goal of the Village is to destroy and redefine conventional masculinity in a way that only benefits the feminine.

I realize that being “girly” is just a myth. What does that mean, anyway? Would my kid be less girly if she dressed up as Spider-Man for Halloween instead of a princess? (and that’s exactly what she did, by the way). Would she be less girly if she wanted to tackle little boys on the football field instead of taking ballet classes? Not to me.

This is precisely the degree of gender obfuscation the Village requires fathers to endorse. The squid ink here is the idea that masculine and feminine, boys & girls, male and female are all one, undifferentiated whole; in fact the old ideas of gender differences that brought the human race to where it is today, we are taught, were nothing more than “myths”. The underlying note is that girls are the functional equals of boys, but girls have the social and sexual advantage of being female.

The social narrative of the Village, the one it needs fathers to internalize and parrot back, is one of Fempowerment, but simultaneously one of male disempowerment. The idea then evolves into a sense of conventional masculinity being a defect of men; men are just unperfected women who are in need of women (or their daughters’) innate correction.

The idea here is that men with daughters make for better men” as defined by the Feminine Imperative and approved by The Village. What Red Pill fathers need to acknowledge in this that their sons will be taught that their maleness is inherently flawed. All of the attributes and evolved instincts that make him a boy will be connected with his masculinity being “toxic”.

“Toxic Masculinity” or “Hyper-masculinity” are common tropes in the Village. We’ve gotten to a point that any form of traditional, conventionally masculine behaviors are now equated with a character flaw in men. So thoroughly has the Village distorted the old books definition of manhood that anything resembling a characteristically masculine behavior is, by default, an act of ‘hyper’ or “over-the-top” masculinity. This, of course, makes characterizing those acts as toxic, or ridiculous.

The Preferred Gender

In my essay, Environmental Stresses I added this quote from the book The Red Queen:

Contrary to popular belief a preference for boys over girls is not universal. Indeed, there is a close relationship between social status and the degree to which sons are preferred. Laura Betzig of the University of Michigan noticed that, in feudal times, lords favored their sons, but peasants were more likely to leave possessions to daughters. While their feudal superiors killed or neglected daughters or banished them to convents, peasants left them more possessions: Sexism was more a feature of elites than of the unchronicled masses.

[…]Lower down the social scale, daughters are preferred even today: A poor son is often forced to remain single, but a poor daughter can marry a rich man. In modern Kenya, Mukogodo people are more likely to take daughters than sons to clinics for treatment when they are sick, and therefore more daughters than sons survive to the age of four. This is rational of the Mukogodo parents because their daughters can marry into the harems of rich Samburu and Maasai men and thrive, whereas their sons inherit Mukogodo poverty. In the calculus of Trivers-Willard, daughters are better grandchildren-production devices than sons.

These quotes are a part of a much more in depth look at how both environmental and social stresses contribute to a ‘preferred gender’ dynamic in both animal populations and human social structure. As I was reviewing this book recently it hit me how western cultures have blatantly been endorsing ‘female’ as the preferred gender for the past 60-70 years now.

I realize this assertion grates on popular culture’s sensibilities when it comes to gender, but as I stated in that essay, at no other time in human history has it been more advantageous to be female than today. Whether you want to argue that assertion from socioeconomic, education, gender identity, social ‘progress’ or any other metric, women in this era enjoy a condition that places their sex as the primary one in terms of social advantage. Women today live in a social condition that advantages, ensures their relative successes and directly or indirectly provisions for their personal security while simultaneously seeking to handicap being male and ridiculing the conventionally masculine.

In many a prior essay I’ve made the assertion that this effort in feminizing boys – in “perfecting” them with feminization – has been a long effort in social engineering. And while I still believe this is true, I think that in recent years the adaptive response to this preferred gender dynamic for Blue Pill fathers, men and boys is now an effort in socially engineering boys to imagine their gender identity as being transitionable to that of girls. Needles to say this push for gender self-reassignment has been embraced by the Village.

Olivia loves Disney’s Frozen princesses, all things sparkly, bright tights and ballet. During her family’s Cuban vacation last summer, she danced in the children’s “mini-disco” before the evening shows, twirling and leaping across the stage. One night another guest turned to her parents, exclaiming, “Your daughter is the girliest girl I’ve ever seen!”

Olivia was born a boy.

She “socially transitioned” from male to female, in nursery school last year. She was four years old.

Today, she attends kindergarten at a Montreal primary school. Only her teachers and the school board know she is transgender, for now.

Olivia (not her real name to protect her identity) is part of a growing phenomenon that is being celebrated but which is also raising strong emotions: an increasing number of children as young as preschoolers appearing at gender identity-clinics across the country, convinced they are of the opposite sex.

The new push to normalize transgender acceptance relies solely on the presumption that gender identity is a social construct rather than influenced by biological, and evolved psychological dynamics inherent in both sexes. The idea again comes back to the egalitarian presumption of a blank-slate equalism and a rejection of gender as a binary determination. Yet in over 90% of transgender identity shifts we see it is boys who opt to “become” female in their self-reassignment. Left to their own non-abstract decision making – and reinforced by Blue Pill parents and the Village – boys will, in the binary, shift to a female / feminine gender identity in overwhelmingly greater numbers than girls shifting to a male / masculine identity.

I would argue that this greater transgender preference for boys is a direct result of the Preferred Gender dynamic and reinforced by the Village conditioning boys for it while normalizing the idea of it in a larger cultural respect. This is the next step in cultural feminization of boys and men that began in the touchy-feely days of men needing to “get in touch with their feminine sides.”

It is no longer enough for boys just to be educated in a feminine-correct manner. It is no longer enough to teach them to despise the gender they were born into, “hoping their penises will fall off”, and it’s no longer enough to condition them to defer to girl’s perfectness. Boys must literally be transitioned to be girls from as young an age as 4 years old.

This is the degree to which the Village and the Feminine Imperative will go to condition future men into a Blue Pill mindset. I outline this in the upcoming book, but this is vitally important for Red Pill fathers to understand because these will be the ‘boys’ they may eventually need to mentor and unplug from their very early psychological damage. Many voices in the manosphere call this damage child abuse and it’s easy to understand why; this damage works on a boy’s most intimate part of his sense of self.

Red Pill fathers need to recognize this perversion of conventional masculinity for what it is and protect their sons (as well as daughters) from it while still anticipating the fall that will result from the “men” this re-engineering of gender will create.

 

583 comments

  1. One question that comes to mind is. Red Pill fathers are going to raise the most stable, emotionally intelligent and *valuable* women in the Sexual Marketplace.

    Thes women are going to be fawned over and courted by Red Pill men desperate to find a worthy woman. Much like women of high beauty (9s & 10s) get courted by men who mistake that for what they really want.

    Keeping one’s Red Pill Daughters grounded, keeping them from getting swollen heads (much like 10s do) and teaching them how to identify the right men in the Sexual Marketplace may prove to be an ongoing challenge. Would appreciate seeing thoughts on this, admittedly very esoteric concern.

  2. I remember you saying something like,

    ” the ancients portrayed the devil not as a man with hooves but as an androgynous being”

    That androgynous “spirit” has dispersed throughout our culture and is the spirit of our time.

  3. How much power does a father have in this matriarchy?

    It’s the answer to that question upon which masculine parenting stands or falls. Human social mores are like currents of water ; looks easy to resist until you’re waist deep in it.

  4. I work on an adolescent psychiatric unit. The number of transgendered male-to-female patients has increased dramatically over the past several years. The majority aren’t what I would term “organic” cases, but rather the result of Axis II pathology exacerbated or caused by the perversity of our current cultural climate.

    Frightening, frightening times.

  5. On some level, I know this is ‘totally wrong’ to feel this way, but I’ll put it out there anyway:

    -I would love to have a child, but only a son.
    -If the woman I got pregnant was carrying a daughter, I’d want her to have an abortion.

    I know that reflects horribly on me. I hope I don’t feel that way forever. I don’t like that I feel that way. But there it is.

  6. Besides, this is what you think in the moment. It does not account what you’d actually feel when the time were to come.

    Just trust this.

  7. Nah Joe… You are just still choking on the Red Pill…

    I have 4 daughters and a son. The son is special no doubt… But the girls, they just love their daddy…

    Red Pill girls come from red pill dads… Hold them accountable… Tease them… Make them work for your approval… Game them. They will respond to you.

    One of mine texted me the other day she could not live with the thought she dissapointed me.

    Chillax and take a more mature look at the situation.

  8. Whoa is right.

    I didn’t dare click on the video heading the essay, as I am feeling good after a long weekend with peak masculine experiences.

    Great essay Rollo.

    “Toxic Masculinity” or “Hyper-masculinity” are common tropes in the Village. We’ve gotten to a point that any form of traditional, conventionally masculine behaviors are now equated with a character flaw in men. So thoroughly has the Village distorted the old books definition of manhood that anything resembling a characteristically masculine behavior is, by default, an act of ‘hyper’ or “over-the-top” masculinity. This, of course, makes characterizing those acts as toxic, or ridiculous….

    ….In many a prior essay I’ve made the assertion that this effort in feminizing boys – in “perfecting” them with feminization – has been a long effort in social engineering. And while I still believe this is true, I think that in recent years the adaptive response to this preferred gender dynamic for Blue Pill fathers, men and boys is now an effort in socially engineering boys to imagine their gender identity as being transitionable to that of girls…..

    ….Red Pill fathers need to recognize this perversion of conventional masculinity for what it is and protect their sons (as well as daughters) from it while still anticipating the fall that will result from the “men” this re-engineering of gender will create.

    I noticed this phenomenon last month at a major inter-state rivalry football game and tailgate activities at my son’s college.

    A red pill lens on red pill parenting for boys is invaluable. I’ve noticed this phenomenon for 15 years in women, including my wife trying to go along with the trope of not allowing the masculine. Fortunately competitive sports for my son has been a great salvation in this respect. And great masculine coaches and father’s that were in my community.

    A long time ago my son, perhaps at age 8 was playing soccer and would run up and down the field and be witnesses by my wife as getting a “stitch in his side” from the running. My wife would be thinking that this was the game conspiring against him and feel sorry for him. Me having played varsity soccer in the 70’s knew he was just being a pussy and was out of shape. (I would pay extra for him not to take up a teenage career in soccer, because although it is a good team sport, watching it bores me to tears. So I let that drop and he only played one season).

    He played baseball, basketball (early) and then football. And the masculine competitive environment allowed him to get value out of team, male competitive sports. Even when he would talk back to a blue pill baseball coach and be sidelined for impudence, I would back him with nascent red pill knowledge.

    Flash forward to last month. He’s turning 22 y.o. soon. At the interstate football game, partying (tailgate wise) were in high swing. The guys are going to party at sororities or all girl off campus houses and getting drunk.

    We tailgated with adults on campus, and then after the game started, we watched the game on TV at the same venues, socialized with other couples and then went to my son’s off campus house after the 12:00 football game.

    Half the roommates took a nap to sleep off the early morning partying and then were half groggy and wandered out to the beautiful fall weather which held a bead on 68 degrees from morning till evening and the fall colors on the trees were spectacular. Just a lovely day. (And I was designated driver.)

    Anyway, drinking started up again, and at times my son was being impudent and masculine. Some examples of this were when my son, not having taken a nap, and the other guys were hungry would go order food, my wife would fret that he isn’t eating. I would tell her no big deal. When he would get in a skirmish with another guy after engaging in a conversation with a girl he knew walking down the sidewalk and when a visiting guy friend would characterize her as being like/similar to another less feminine girl both knew, my son would tell him to STFU in a masculine way. Basically dominate him, not in a white knight way but in a dominant leader of men way.

    We had some discussion at the same time about a legal, Walter White like enterprise that my son had engaged in the summer including and among my wife and his roommates. I won’t say anything more about the enterprise, but it gave him street cred including with the adjacent frat boy house. It was also a leader of men type of deal.

    Later he would actually be rude to one of his friend/roomate by dumping some extra sweet shit soda into the guy’s vodka drink. Basically shit testing the guy.

    My wife would chastise him for his masculine behavior and I corrected her by saying he is fine. With my red pill lens, I was seeing impudence, leader of men and slightly unbridled masculinity. He had my endorsement.

    Nonetheless I chided my wife. And let her roam. I would let my wife roam (as my role of designated driver is) as when she would draw over the girls in the all girls house (one member of which was the daughter of a famous 80’s baseball Cy Young winner). These guys in the house were wanting to get with the girls next door, but had been too shy to engage with them, and they invited them to their party that night, but I digress, there.

    My rambling point is, my wife thought and wanted to tone down his rowdy masculine type of frat-not-frat boy type of behavior. When my red pill lens told me this is just normal masculine behavior and to let our son roam. After all, he’s feeling confident in his masculinity and exercising college social learning how to get along with guys and girls. He’s maintained a 3.96 grade point average and I’ll be damned if he needs to tone down his masculinity, nor will I not be afraid of his being able to handle the rigors of the drugs or alcohol that he is free to explore.

    At the same time, I have the feeling about this kind of thing–allowing normal masculine behavior– also feels to me as dancing/tight roping on a razors edge. Hey, that is red pill leaning out to your edge. I endorse it. As long as he or I don’t fall off that edge of a cliff. A man’s life is not dainty and feminine.

    I say let the masculine roam in sons. My son has gotten into deep trouble for it before (at age 14, 16 and 18, but he is stronger and better for it now, with my masculine and my wife’s feminine backing.) I equate this to the Ray Rice type of situ. (I don’t understand or even know that story fully, and I’m not endorsing it. I think it was a pawn for the FI to make it news, but I don’t think it should not have been important national news–masculine guy gets in trouble, he fucked up by letting his masculinity bleed into a situation. I don’t endorse that shit, or for son’s to do some anti-legal stuff, but it is not licence for the FI to shut down masculinity.

  9. This guy, Jordan Peterson, is fighting the battle against transgender and free speech in Canada.

    You bet Cuck-anada will be at the front and centre of letting boys “figure out “they are females at a young age.

    I see more and more of gender- neutrality in Canada.

    In universities, they have signs saying “All- Gender ” bathrooms.

    They also post signs in Male and Female saying anyone that identifies with that sex, can use the bathroom.

  10. Having raised (yeah reared for ya effete types) both boys and girls I can tell you there IS a difference that appears to be genetic. It’s amusing to see my female friends who usually come from all daughter families act shocked at how boys behave even as young as 3 or 4.

    There is this social pressure to reign in a rambunctious aggressive boy. It’s funny to see my boys on the playground and have some hipster goatee girlyman confront me about how my boys are treating his pudgy son. I simply tell them to stop and sure enough the pudgy wants to play anyway. I just shrug my shoulders at neckbeard and neckbeard usually becomes engrossed in his iPhag. Meanwhile I am watching like a hawk to make sure pudgy is not permanently damaged. – Insert pet peeve here: What is UP with all these granola people NOT watching their kids??? I mean I have had so many frumpy Birkenstock wearing women come up to me asking where Sariah is it just makes me want to scream. Watch your own children for goodness sakes!! Or just “free range raise” them and delivery them to the local pedophile. m’kay?

    This “it takes a village” trope just grates me about raising masculine boys. Frankly the best way to raise a boy is to put him in situations where he has to use his own resources. Camping, hiking and other outdoor activities are great for this. I don’t like camping in any form or fashion but yep I’m out there showing my son how to build a fire and setup a tent. Then they go out in the woods playing army rangers or what not. Occasionally mothers are allowed to camp with us. But from experience I know to get a bottle of wine and top her cup up to make sure she is not on edge worrying about how the boys will do after turning a dead tree into a playground.

    I am very concerned about the future sons of America. There is just so much overhang that proper composure in our society is effete, faggy and unmanly. A young man being pleased that he could carry a heavy load, show off athletic ability etc is somehow now disparaged. It’s like we have gone from worshiping this manliness (as in College Athletics) to shunning it instead of embracing it like we would any other activity.

  11. Author says that masculinity is shamed – it got me thinking how it is done?
    I have taken a notice how mothers usually try to control overly active behavior from young boys. Once I was working out at the outdoor gym. There was a boy climbing over the training machine. His mother threatened him by saying he will get a beating from me for misbehaving hehe..

  12. There is no doubt that this is happening on a wider scale than anyone who is not currently raising kids in this culture understands.

    In my own case, what I have done for my son in this context is competitive team sports (football as well) and wilderness summer camps where he basically goes (now leads) canoe trips in the Canadian wilderness from 3 to 20 days in length. One summer he went all the way up to Hudson Bay — that was one long trip. What you are looking for are contexts where your son is removed from the prevailing culture and forced to work together with other boys and young men to achieve things together that require (or greatly benefit from) masculine strength and the kind of camaraderie that develops among a group of men who are tasking together towards a common purpose. It’s not perfect (high school is still high school, after all, even if you are a football player), but it’s better than being in other contexts where these aspects of your son are not being cultivated. Of course, in your own life you have to model what you want him to be to the greatest degree you can, but much of what happens with your kids’ development occurs in a different context where you are not present, so it is important to determine that context and mold it to the greatest extent you can as well.

    On the gender transition thing, I think it’s happening on both sides. Girls are also being masculinized, and being encourages to behave in masculine ways. The difference, however, is that society evaluates boys and girls, men and women, differently, as we know. For a woman/girl, as long as she is feminine *looking*, she will be viewed as feminine by men and women alike, and won’t suffer that much of a penalty for having a kind of bitchy, pushy, masculine personality and lifestyle. This is because while the culture has been busy beating down ideas about traditional female behavior, and has been wildly successful at it, corresponding attempts to beat down ideas about traditional female appearance — which are ongoing — have been far less successful because women, generally, like being attractive to men. For boys and men, however, as we know the evaluation of their maleness is not primarily appearance driven, but persona/mastery/frame driven. So while a masculinized girl who maintains a feminine appearance can still “pass” as a feminine girl, a boy who is feminized can never do the same thing, in the eyes of both men and women alike. This is very poorly understood by the culture as a whole, which tends to see the problem as being video games, but the reality is that when you feminize boys to the degree we have done, they cease to be masculine because being masculine is not about appearance but about persona/mastery/frame.

    The culture then asks “well, why don’t we just change masculinity then?” Well, good luck with that. The primary reason that doesn’t work well for men is, again, those personal, non-physical aspects are the sine qua non of what makes a male masculine (or not). We can’t replicate what we did with girls over the past 40 years in boys because girls can still be feminine due to their appearance, whereas boys can’t. And if you “redefine masculinity” to the point where it arises from non-masculine persona/mastery/frame, all you have done is made men more feminine and slapped a different tag on it — it doesn’t mean that these more feminine men who have a “broader masculinity definition” will be viewed as masculine by most men and women. They won’t., just like Abby Wambach will never be viewed as feminine by most men and women.

  13. There is a lot packed into this article and I cannot possibly do it justice in the short time I have this morning. But it’s a crucially important conversation, and I wanted to add a few thoughts/insights to richen the dialog. I will come back tomorrow night and catch up and expand if warranted.

    – Almost all the 90% of boys who transition are homosexual as well.

    – Actual genetic transgenderism type of issues do occur. Looks like about 1 in 4400 live births.

    – Sexual orientation has a lot to do with this. One of the best theories out there posits that fetal hormonal exposure is the driver of sexual orientation. Homosexual boys get estrogen when they shouldn’t and the same with actual lesbians.

    – Given the much more fluid and plastic nature of female sexual orientation, and the relation of orientation to gender, it’s not surprising that these insane ideas about gender fluidity come mainly from women. I’d bet large sums of money many women who become radfems are so because they have interpreted their own sexual desires in a particular way.

    – Actual lesbianism, where a woman only finds women attractive is much more rare than male homosexuality.

    Prof J. Michael Bailey of Northwestern published this controversial book summarizing his life’s research into male homosexuality and transgenderism, The Man Who Would be Queen http://faculty.wcas.northwestern.edu/JMichael-Bailey/TMWWBQ.pdf

    One of his key points is that all of this works differently for men than it does women. It is not coincidental we see this agenda being shoved at us largely by female “gender studies” radfem types. A byproduct of the equalist myth, they just assume male sexuality must be like their’s and impose their views on us, no matter the cost. No matter how absurd.

    I got pronoun corrected about a month ago. Lol, what a fucked up world we live in.

    But I also have to point out this. The Christian shaming of sexuality in general and its views on homosexuality (it is not a choice for men and if you cannot accept this you are just being stubborn and ignorant) have given the left a lot of ammo to use against the right. Part of the reason we are here is due to your mythology. Just sayin’…

  14. Mastery personal frame
    “a boy who is feminized can never do the same thing, in the eyes of both men and women alike.”
    It’s in part why culture controls the diealogue of trauma.

    “Actual lesbianism, where a woman only finds women attractive is much more rare than male homosexuality.”
    I grew up with nothing but bisexual women around me.

  15. Whatever happened to Mitch? I was really looking forward to having my entire worldview upended just by continuing to read what he writes . . . Maybe he ascended?

    @Team PUA

    Mini-FR:
    Because of my schedule, I’m following the Yareally-approved “game whenever you can” method. During the week, that means walking home from work and approaching everyone who looks interesting.

    Girls standing and looking at their phone are super easy now, even if they are wearing headphones. I’m stuck on two scenarios: 1) girls on bikes; and 2) girls walking towards me when I’m headed the other direction.

    In both cases, I have about two seconds to identify whether they’re hot and in many cases I’ve had to eject because they are much less cute up close. I did Yad stops for a week here in Local and those were universally rejected–it’s just way too confrontational for this culture.

    With girls on bikes, the best response I’ve received (to my “Hey!” opener) is a friendly smile. They never even slow down and anyone watching would see that as a bad DLV. With girls walking the other way, my best reactions have come from catching their eyes about ten steps away and then walking up to the girl as if she was standing still. However, I still have only about a 10% response where they don’t just smile, step around me, and keep walking.

    Is there a better way to do this? Is it possible to small-chunk these walking-home approaches?

  16. @Zhu Wunang

    “2) girls walking towards me when I’m headed the other direction.”
    “I did Yad stops for a week here in Local and those were universally rejected–it’s just way too confrontational for this culture.”

    The jist of those videos is walk with her until you can display enough value to get her to stop. I would go indirect, play up needing help like asking for directions, to avoid the confrontational stuff, and as they’re explaining start dropping in teases about their answers (“you’re sending me down that dark alleyway?? I’ll need you to be my bodyguard” etc), or if you want to go direct just throw in a “I don’t really need to know, I just thought you were cute and wanted to talk to you”

    The main thing though is that you don’t have to stop them IMMEDIATELY Yad style…go indirect and/or walk with them and demonstrate some value and THEN stop moving and they should stop with you to continue the interaction.

    Also brush up on your first 60 seconds…you’re going to want to display as much value in as short a time window as possible and have a specific time bridge planned out (instadate or solid number close with specific plans). Paul Janka’s “move trailer” concept applies, or Todd yelling at you here:

    Mystery Method style you’ll want to open, DHV, tease, soon as you get her giggling qualify her on something besides her looks so she feels special and feels like that thing she just did or you just noticed about her is what made you WANT her number, then time bridge close with SPECIFIC plans (for a day2 within the next 48 hours, ideally later that day). Instadate is best if she’s available for it though, obviously lol

    Good luck, props for finding opportunities wherever you can!

  17. @ scribblerg

    I also wondered if boys wanting to “transition” had anything to do with low levels of testosterone?

    Doctors would probably be ostracised for even suggesting a link never mind trying to”fix” the problem with simple testosterone injections.

    Far more SJW and feminine identification points are to be gained by facilitating the transition of low T male to female using estrogen therapy because testosterone = bad, estrogen = good.

    Looks like Islam really will take over the west the way we are headed, the strong will always conquer the weak, that’s just basic biology.

    We really are headed for societal and economic collapse, and when it happens you won’t believe how fast the current crop of progressive liberal women will suddenly find “toxic masculinity” to be the most attractive thing in the world.

  18. Happy red pill son.

    Walking through the grocery store the other day, some mommy type scowling at my 12 year old son then at me. The reason being whenever he is not in school, he wants to wear his 6″ bone handle knife in his holster. Day, night, whatever, he wants his knife with him, “just in case”.

    I just laughed at her.

    Ten seconds later I get pulled over by a slightly grizzly looking old guy.

    “Is that your son?”

    “Sure is”

    “Excellent, it’s good to see a boy with a knife, fucking kids are all pansies these days, good to see one acting like a boy oughtta act.” chuckle chuckle.

    Obviously wearing the knife is an earned thing, with it he must demonstrate respect and responsibility and he knows it. He must not be tone deaf to people who are made uncomfortable by it. It kind of acts as a proxy of masculinity wherein he can see different peoples reactions to it and calibrate accordingly,

    To be clear, I make sure he does not feel he should have to hide it or anything.

  19. A joke was made on RvF back in January 2015 about future thread titles in the year 2114.

    One of them was, “Poll: Do You Guys Prefer Girth or Length on Your Wife’s Penis?”

    That thread may come sooner than expected.

  20. @Agent P, that’s excellent.

    With my son, I always give him extra treats at snack time. I’ll say, “Okay, son, you only get two cookies,” as I hand him three and give him the shush signal. He knows it’s something between us dudes that we keep from his mother and sister. I also tell him that the less television he watches the better because the television makes boys and men to look like idiots. When he watches, I point out all the instances where it happens. I also get him to hit the punching bag so that at least once a day, the boy gets some adrenaline and testosterone pumping through his veins. Whenever his mother unfairly yells at him for being a boisterous boy, I correct her.

    It’s the small things that let him know there’s another red pill world out there.

  21. A new study of twins provides the strongest evidence yet that homosexuality has a genetic basis, researchers say,

    We found 52 percent of identical twin brothers of gay men also were gay, compared with 22 percent of fraternal twins.”

    http://www.nytimes.com/1991/12/17/science/gay-men-in-twin-study.html

    The MOST you could say is that genetics MAY have SOME impact on sexual choice, not that there is a genetic basis. If this is the strongest evidence for a genetic basis, we have to conclude that the evidence doesn’t show that there is a genetic basis. Now if something like 95% of identical twin brothers were both gay, then that would be strong evidence. Otherwise, why are 48% of twins sexually divergent if homosexuality has a genetic basis?

    Gotta be able to interpret the data properly. This is why amateurs fuck up when making scientific claims.

    Homosexual boys get estrogen when they shouldn’t and the same with actual lesbians.

    Presumably both twins get the same estrogen, yet one is gay and the other isn’t in about half the cases.

    (it is not a choice for men and if you cannot accept this you are just being stubborn and ignorant)

    Uh, no, there is a LOT more studying to be done. You are being presumptive and rash. (Note that I also didn’t lump all atheists in here.) You lumped all Christians together and lots of Christians favor gay pastors, gay marriages, etc. Oops.

    You have some emotional antipathy against Christians for some reason. Let’s call this the Anti-Christian Emotional Neurosis. Note that not all atheists have it, but some do.

  22. Anecdote du jour on gender bending and culture.

    So a while ago I was spending some time on the campus of a major national university in Toronto. Now Toronto is already incredibly gay, biggest population of gays outside of SF in the world. Whatever, I don’t have any beef with gay guys, gals whatever. Suffice to say there is a very alive and well gay culture in Toronto.

    Anyhow, touring said campus for work and spent some time at the student center. Sweet Jesus if it wasn’t the most effemenite panty waist collection of dolts ever. I am sure I missed some sporto types who may well have been in class or working out at the gym but 50% of the remaining so called men. Dear lord they were a field of very special flowers. I know campus’ are progressive and all that but it struck me how totally devoid of testosterone the whole scene was.

    Granted, I went to a different school where it was 50% farmers by content in terms of students, so I think naturally a lot of the guys were more old school masculine. But this blew me away. I’d say easily 5-10% of the guys I saw must have been wearing eye liner. Now if the goal was to stick it to their parents, fine, check, I get it, mission accomplished. But the prancing around like they were, it was very much an affectation how they all walked, talked, acted etc.It was seriously like watching a bunch of girls. From the stick up the ass walk, to the up-talk and vocal fry to the catty gossiping, uggh. Terrible. i couldn’t imagine ten of them together being able to push a car out of a ditch on a snowy day.

    But then I got it, they basically earn social credit by acting that way. They get points for their progressive bona fides and get to appear more “inclusive” and “in touch” with their feelings and everything. Man oh man though, if you are actually in that environment, as an RP guy, it must be like shooting sleeping fish in a barrel when it comes to closing with chicks. Like fully 50% of the male population must be taking themselves out of the game not by being incel or going MGTOW but simply by going full fucking pan-gender. Sure I imagine some of those guys close with chicks who are equally confused but I don’t imagine they get much traction with more traditionally oriented girls.

    Left me shaking my head.

  23. “We really are headed for societal and economic collapse, and when it happens you won’t believe how fast the current crop of progressive liberal women will suddenly find “toxic masculinity” to be the most attractive thing in the world.”

    And they’ll be happy. Because they’ll have something real to complain about.
    Manufactured faux-rage must get tiresome.

    Our boys all got swiss army knives at age five. To me this is a little early, but no mishaps (knock on wood). They each got a “starter” rifle (a .22) at about twelve. Jack Donovan’s ‘Way of Men’ is key.

  24. One thing you can do for boys is put them in relatively small high schools. Boys like to be excellent and there are more slots per school-size available to be a jock or a brain or whatever in a small school.

  25. @sfer
    “One thing you can do for boys is put them in relatively small high schools.”

    Works for girls too. Less peer-pressure in a classroom with 6 students

  26. Let’s drop a bit of science here and separate true body dysmorphia from fashion statements.
    Depending on where you are and what study you cite, gay folks make up about 5 to 8% of everyone. Truly dysmorphic trans people, or transsexuals as they were called, who really seem to be in the wrong body, is more like 1/100 of that. OK that still rounds out to 300,000 people, but out of a nation of 330 million.

    What biological or other factors makes this or that person gay is still unsettled, and there is some fluidity between straightness and gayness recognized in the literature (i.e., prisons, isolated groups). The one thing that is certain is it cannot be “converted” by force or “changed” like a pair of socks, as Churchians preach (and radical feminists preach as a “political” statement, thereby undercutting their own free sexuality manifesto. Strange how they agree on this).

    The rest is what I would call a fashion statement. It is fashionable in Portlandia type circles to push boys toward girlhood, not because the child is that way, but because the parents think it’s cute or trendy to be seen doing that. Where a boy might cross-dress once for fun, or pick up a Barbie doll and play with it for a few minutes, then set it down, is now seized upon as an “orientation” to be “encouraged” and “confirmed” where back in the day it would not even be blinked at unless it became a constant habit. One prominent example that got a lot of press: the parents who insisted on not “revealing” their son’s gender, even to him. Their stubbornness was lauded as a new parenting “paradigm” to smash gender roles. Until the kid got to school and had lots of problems because of his identity problem, which truly has messed him up. His parents did not help him with that, and of course if he is told he can’t define himself you can bet the teachers, admins and other kids will regardless, and they don’t obey the decrees of the trendoids. Still it’s not the parent’s fault the kid is all messed up, they’re so advanced and shit.

    For some reason tomboy girls have never been scrutinized or trendified like that, and if tomboys become more feminine as they age it’s a conundrum for the SJW’s: who are they to bark about denying this woman’s evolving personhood into who she is? Who died and made them the boss of her?

    Keep in mind: The good news is these fashion statements, and the whole trans thing, are really not that common. The bad news is they get a lot of noise they don’t deserve, trying to make you believe it is a coming thing when it isn’t. Some of it is these Lydia the Tattooed Lady types tooting their horns, to be sure, but a lot of it is us getting the vapors over it and amplifying it by our wailing.

    These fashion statements are not uncommon in our times and some are truly silly. Some are truly destructive. A trip down memory lane gives us these recent examples:

    1) False memory syndrome, where through suggestion children come to believe they were buggered by day care workers and/or family members. Recall the Margaret Kelly Michaels case in NJ and the McMasters day care in CA. The original Fake News: the stories sound so horrible you assume they must be true, and they were believed and repeated without fact checking until some hard pushback occurred some time later. Therapists and criminal justice folks made their careers with them. These false memory implants are truly crippling: once the fake memory is implanted it stays and grows like a cancer, destroying the family and stunting the child’s ability to function as an adult without massive SSRI dosages.

    2) That all fidgety boys have ADHD and must be drugged with Ritalin. I have seen a couple of truly ADHD kids, they do exist. But this was a greatly overhyped and over diagnosed fake malady. And yes it was women teachers and admins who wanted the boys sedated so they could maintain order. Everybody said it so it had to be true. Never mind that the medicines were never field tested in trials for that off-label use. Never mind that the true malady was brighter boys’ boredom with stuff they already got past, so they act out. I have personal knowledge on this one from my misspent youth, fortunately this off-label use of Ritalin had not yet been discovered during my Boy’s Life.

    3) The “parent as best friend” and its corollary, 4) helicopter parenting. These ideas sadly have taken hold of everyone, purely by anecdote Fake News and busybodies calling 911 when they see kids out walking by themselves. Free-range childhood is now grounds for arrest. Letting kids try and fail and deal with the consequences is considered abuse. This, like the ADHD thing, is also amplified and weaponized in divorce custody and child support proceedings. (Where the real reason the kids are acting out is their home is being torn apart and they are treated like footballs, but who cares what they think, it’s the parents’ feelz that matter).

    Now what I day here is meant to amplify the OP, not dispute it. Pushback is in order. Some of you guys get it right: a mom is not a dad, you parent your way, and bark back at anyone who clucks to you. Maintain your frame and at most you just glare back at them if they offer “advice”, or at most hiss “I’ve got this” and that’s done the trick for me over the years. Most of all, DON’T LISTEN TO THE FAKE NEWS AND THE CLUCKING. Look at WHAT IS.

  27. Prof Mike Bailey’s book, which scrib cites above, is interesting in that it describes two kinds of male-to-female trans: the first he calls “homosexual transsexuals”, which is pretty much what scrib is describing above, while the second he calls “autogynephilic transsexuals”. A key difference is when it onsets — the first kind onsets usually prior to puberty in young children, and it’s quite uncommon. The second kind, which appears to be more common, onsets *after* puberty, and sometimes as late as the late teens or 20s, and is first and foremost directly about sexuality in that these people are attracted sexually to themselves as women — that is, they become sexually aroused by themselves as women, like to look at themselves or pictures of themselves, and so on. Both kinds tend to have sex with men, but the latter are often not people who were attracted to men before they started crossdressing, or who were not attracted to men when they were not crossdressed, but then later found that their sexual encounters with men while dressed as women were more satisfying than what they had going on with women. In a way it was like they were trying to get women’s sexual power by making themselves look like women — the power to attract visually, rather than the burden of performance and seduction, if you will.

    Needless to say, Bailey got all kinds of hate from the trans community for his book, and they tried to get him tossed from Northwestern’s faculty — they didn’t succeed. If I’m remembering correctly (I read the book over ten years ago), Bailey’s prescriptions were that (1) “homosexual transsexuals” should be encouraged to be effeminate men, and the gay community should be encouraged to be more accepting of effeminate men (Bailey’s theory is that these types don’t fit into masculine culture — even, or even especially the more macho elements of gay male culture, and so they escape that by becoming women and attracting “straight” men), rather than going through expensive and difficult to reverse chemical and/or surgical changes to accommodate the confusion experienced by being effeminate males and (2) “autogynephilic transsexuals” should be considered to suffer from a serious mental condition, which should be treated, but they also shouldn’t transition. Basically his prescription was that transition should be very, very rare, even among people who have a kind of gender dysphoria, because it is so invasive and irreversible, and the outcomes are often not great (lots of regret down the line often). This went over like a lead balloon, obviously, and that was years before the current trans-mania.

    So, the “science” on this is very far away from consensus, really, and there’s lots of disagreement. A lot of that gets shouted down or has been tried to get shouted down, but it’s still out there.

    What we’re seeing now is a kind of a mix. Some of the kids who are behaving as the opposite sex when very young are probably of the kind of that Bailey would call “homosexual transsexuals” (he thinks homosexuality is inherited, apparently) who don’t feel comfortable around boys from a young age due to being very naturally effeminate. But some of the ones who are only picking this up later may be the second kind, where a part of it is trying to play the woman’s part in the sex dance rather than the man’s part — for various reasons. One thing about Bailey’s work is that it doesn’t address female-to-male, because historically at least this has been much rarer than male-to-female. Recently, there has been a huge uptick in female-to-male in US high schools (this is why quite a few of the cases challenging bathrooms and locker rooms and so on involve female to male), and no-one really knows why. My own guess is that it’s a combination of (1) fashion (hard to be more “in” today than being trans), (2) attention, (3) difficulty fitting in otherwise, and (4) discomfort with playing the conventional sexual role of girls (pressure to be pretty, act sexy and so on) coupled with perhaps some greater degree of sexual fluidity and/or confusion. In any case, it’s pretty new and it hasn’t been studied much because of that.

  28. “I also wondered if boys wanting to “transition” had anything to do with low levels of testosterone?”

    Nope, social capital.
    Remember how much adulation caitlyn jenner received for transforming into something rather than actually accomplishing something.

    Why else men would voluntarily becomes eunuchs within the walls of Forbidden City but for the power and social capital associated with that act ?

    “Looks like Islam really will take over the west the way we are headed, the strong will always conquer the weak, that’s just basic biology.”

    Putin in Russia, Abe in Japan, Tories and Brexit in Uk, upcoming Le Pen in France , Trump in US and you still believe that Islam will take over West?
    Right now, all thats Islam has to keep its pretty face up is the billions it dumps into foundations run by leftists. Leftists will dump Islam once the billions evaporate.

    (Without the billions the Sauds and GCC pouring in doubt much of North Africa upto Syria would choose remain Muslim at all.)

    Lately coming to realize though, all the political correctness and social politeness shown by West was just “cost of doing business” to West.
    Except for the birth rate, West will do just fine.

  29. This is like my house everyday… push your sons to learn to attack and defend… look forward to the day he can take you… (as if…)

  30. Also cosign team sports (as well as individual like swimming)… especially Lax and hockey… Both are physical yet not as physics dependent as football… more room for varying body types. and the kids are uniformly smart asses and highly social…

  31. @Sentient
    Book ordered from Library, thanks.

    (One thing the City actually does well around here is run a library system, I can log on, order a book or movie and it’ll show up at the local branch in a few days with no charge).

    Will let you know what the boy has to say about it when he’s done.

  32. Thanks again to all here. As the major hull-holes are now patched, I’m back on deck trimming sails:

    The boys and I were gone for three days, no cell service, getting back, wife and I have mini-date.

    She tells me that this masculinity thing is turning the boys against her (I don’t talk to her about it, she just hears the boys and me talking about it, but not in masculinity terms, things are-a-changin’). The boys don’t listen to her (her hoary shit tests aren’t working on them anymore , they have other things on their minds, like working at a local restaurant – 14 y.o. kitchen duty, 16 y.o. waiting tables) and are becoming little “a-holes”. “They want to be you, and are picking up all your worst behaviors.” I don’t have anything to say to that. They are becoming their own RP people without my unilateral RP lecturing now. She noticed my second son has started listening to Steven Crowder as does the older one, and questioned it to him:

    Her: What now? Are you joining their gang?

    Son #2: Yes. I want to be one of them. (Oh boy, I want to spit-take laugh, but don’t…chill is best)

    Two things, our house has been filled with out-loud laughter like never before, she really likes…who said it in thread above…”the full spectrum of human emotion” or such. Heh.

    @ playdontpay

    “Looks like Islam really will take over the west the way we are headed, the strong will always conquer the weak, that’s just basic biology.”

    True, Islam easily fills spiritual vacuums. Hence prison inmates are vulnerable to its simplicity and faithless Europe and trending U.S. Where faith in freewill and self-control are strong (TRM)…Islam and churchianity is a hard sell. The concept of inshallah leads naturally to powerlessness…and cultural stagnation. Islam is essentially a dictatorial pan-societal imperative and requires a intellectual duplicity for realization (One example: The innocent are to be protected. Not Muslim? No innocence, no protection.)

    The Alphas lead, women next, then Betas. This was quite clarifying of what I’ve read lately. Culture doesn’t require everyone to conform, just a minority of dedicated, insightful and fearless leaders. There’s enough natural leaders nationwide (considering the small sub-sample of guys here) to confront top-down-foisted, crimes against nature…and only takes unflappable commitment of the self-perpetuating few.

    What do the PUA’s recommend to the newbies…”unjustified confidence” or analogous. IMO that confidence is fungible, and must be.

    Being the underdog can be fun, we all like a good donnybrook. This battle is ours for the winning, as long as we fight on. Then we consolidate our gains, fortify our ranks. Success begets success.

    My book recommedation:

    https://www.amazon.com/King-Mountain-Wilderness-David-Thompson/dp/0843939222

  33. Novaseeker
    Being able to play ball and enjoy life has been a huge part of what can hurt a culture with males.
    http://www.joericketts.com/about.html
    “What we’re seeing now is a kind of a mix. Some of the kids who are behaving as the opposite sex when very young are probably of the kind of that Bailey would call “homosexual transsexuals” (he thinks homosexuality is inherited, apparently) who don’t feel comfortable around boys from a young age due to being very naturally effeminate. But some of the ones who are only picking this up later may be the second kind, where a part of it is trying to play the woman’s part in the sex dance rather than the man’s part — for various reasons. One thing about Bailey’s work is that it doesn’t address female-to-male, because historically at least this has been much rarer than male-to-female. Recently, there has been a huge uptick in female-to-male in US high schools (this is why quite a few of the cases challenging bathrooms and locker rooms and so on involve female to male), and no-one really knows why. My own guess is that it’s a combination of (1) fashion (hard to be more “in” today than being trans), (2) attention, (3) difficulty fitting in otherwise, and (4) discomfort with playing the conventional sexual role of girls (pressure to be pretty, act sexy and so on) coupled with perhaps some greater degree of sexual fluidity and/or confusion. In any case, it’s pretty new and it hasn’t been studied much because of that.”

    persona/mastery/frame.

  34. “‘The Village’ will raise your kids if you don’t. You will be resisted, you will be ridiculed, you will be accused of every thought-crime to the point of being dragged away to jail for imparting Red Pill awareness to them (in the future I expect it to be equated with child abuse).”

    Or at some point, something will have to give. This cannot continue indefinitely without a conflict. Eventually men will resist, either out of desperation or because they have nothing to lose by doing so. Sooner or later, the Saxon will relearn to hate. And as Dalrock has mentioned on his blog, all good will they once had will be gone.

  35. The attitude in the manosphere, and really, in a lot of places — just America generally — is “quick-fix.”

    I’d like to avoid the term “TRP.” because a lot of what passes for TRP in the manosphere is just pseudoscientific sexist/racist/blah. But, teaching both young boys and girls about how to deal with the opposite sex is great.

    However, you can’t learn the correct lessons to teach without going out and hitting the field. Like, you can’t just sit here and read TRM and then dust off your hands and go”all right, time to repeat this stuff to little Jimmy.”

    All of the manosphere writings, including TRM, that are quality are about….1-5% of the education. That’s the brute fact.

    If you’re like me and received almost zero guidance about women growing up, you have a ton of work to do. The amount of work is staggering. Even if you have a decent mindset, if you want to improve, you still have a ton of work to do.

    Especially if, like me, you were also a fatass (obese) when starting this whole thing. I believe everyone who starts PUA should also start going to the gym. Not for the muscles, not for the strength, but just for the reference experience of how willpower can change your life.

    The amount of people who can go from obese to thin and stay thin is….pretty much zero. Go look at the studies. Even less, the amount who go from obese to super fit. What kind of change is that, in terms of how people respond to you passively? In terms of your personal health?

    If I had to guess, I’d say 2-3 standard deviations. Closer to 3 than 2.

    So, to make that kind of change in your life takes that level of willpower. You pretty much have to unlearn everything with regard to how you eat and live.

    And PUA is the same with regard to how you socialize. If you’re starting PUA, you’re more or less going for improving your dating life to the same degree.

    Takes the same level of willpower. That’s why so many people wash out. That’s why so many people end up at sluthate.

    The longshot isn’t that you could learn how to be much better. The longshot is whether you have what it takes to just go out in the field over and over and subject yourself to what it gives you — nothing but harsh truth.

    You’re looking at between half a year to a year before you get any actual success. You’re looking at another year probably before you have a reliable skill set that allows you to more or less consistently pull the hotties. And probably another year before you start being able to pull off hero moves.

    Show me someone who says otherwise and I’ll show you someone leaning hard on their looks/FAG (and when you adjust the chicks to their looks level, it won’t look so impressive)…or some other crutch.

  36. Critical & Sensitive Periods of Brain Development pg10 onward
    Trauma Impact on the Brain & Body
    According to the Center for Excellence in Children’s Mental Health (CECMH) (2010),
    traumatic stress can have an effect on the way the body functions. Some children exposed to
    repetitive trauma have been shown to have differing levels of cortisol, a critical stress-sensitive
    hormone. Cortisol is necessary for healthy functioning but damaging when levels are too high or
    too low. Children as young as six months have been shown to experience significant changes in
    cortisol levels due to stress.
    In the book, Please Don’t Label My Child, Shannon and Heckman (2002), report that
    when a child’s brain is exposed to chronic trauma, the developing brain and the child
    himself/herself actually begin to feel that the hyper-aroused state is normal and what is
    unhealthy, unsafe, and damaging is what feels the most familiar to the child. Trauma can cause
    abnormal development of the hippocampus (cognition and memory) and the amygdala (part of
    the limbic system where emotions are located). Trauma can also weaken the connection between
    the two hemispheres and can be the cause of an underdeveloped cerebral cortex. Trauma can also
    inhibit neuron function (Shannon & Heckman, 2002).
    Bruce Perry, MD, PhD and Ronnie Pollard, MD (1999), have taken dramatic images that
    show how trauma and neglect can actually stunt brain growth (Appendix C). Although the
    depicted brain damage is very rare, it clearly shows the dramatic effect that trauma can have on
    the developing brain. The functional consequences of sensory deprivation during
    neurodevelopment can be significant. In some severe deprivation situations, sensory deprivation
    or sensory disorganization during critical or sensitive periods can result in permanent
    dysfunction. Beers and DeBellis (2002, p. 120), identified “ways in which trauma-induced
    CHILDHOOD TRAUMA AND THE BRAIN 9
    catecholamine and cortisol levels can adversely affect brain development through the accelerated
    loss of neurons, abnormal pruning, delayed myelination, and stunted neurogenesis.”
    Neurogenesis is the process by which neurons are generated, a phenomenon that is most active
    during the pre-natal period of development.
    One common reaction to danger or threat has been labeled the ‘fight or flight’ reaction.
    According to the ChildTrauma Academy (2002), as an individual begins to feel threatened, the
    brain orchestrates a complex, total body response. To ensure appropriate mental and physical
    response to the threat, the brain and body will shift along an arousal continuum. All aspects of
    functioning change during a traumatic event – feeling, thinking, and behaving. In an alarm state,
    the individual is not using abstract thought and planning, they are using the most primitive part
    of the brain to react and survive. This increase in sympathetic nervous system activity causes
    increased heart rate, blood pressure, and respiration which consequently can cause
    hypervigilance and the child tunes out all non-critical information. These changes prepare the
    child to fight or run from the threat. Common reactions to threat in children are to either act out
    impulsively (fight) or dissociate (flight)
    https://www.winona.edu/counseloreducation/Images/Leah_Williams_Capstone.pdf
    Violence to males
    http://www.cachouston.org/media/files/page/The-Vortex-of-Violence-1-.pdf

  37. Definition of Psychological Trauma and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
    Trauma is defined as a physical or psychological threat or assault to a child’s physical 
    integrity, sense of self, safety or survival or to the physical safety of another person
    significant to the child (Vermont CUPS Handbook, p. 170).  Children may experience 
    trauma as a result of a number of different circumstances, such as: Abuse, including sexual, physical, emotional 
    Exposure to domestic violence  Severe natural disaster, such as a flood, fire, earthquake or tornado 
    War or other military actions 
    Abandonment  Witness to violence in the neighborhood or school setting, including fights, drive by
    shootings, and law enforcement actions 
    Personal attack by another person or an animal 
    Kidnapping
    Severe bullying
    Medical procedure, surgery, accident or serious illness. 
    http://mentalhealth.vermont.gov/sites/dmh/files/report/cafu/DMH-CAFU_Psychological_Trauma_Moroz.pdf

  38. @Rollo: You are definitely on to something. Children, while pre-rational, are not unobservant. They clearly see where the power lies in their home and mimic – that mimicry is rewarded.

  39. “Not for the muscles, not for the strength, but just for the reference experience of how willpower can change your life.”

    Oh man, yes. This is the model parenting approach. It’s a hard concept for younger (below 9) to grasp, but the rote lessons are there when they’re older and “hitting the field.” Giving kids access to observable Truth is invaluable, not for the sake of looks, grades, adult approval…but for the sake of self-preservation and improvement. At day’s end they’re accountable only to themselves. Appealing to their higher-order volition is the only way to go, otherwise…well, the village has the ‘quick-fix.”

    No participation awards allowed, it all must be earned.

    Add in a consistent, understandable example of parental behavior, and we have secure boys to steely-eyed men.

    Scray, this is why I’m confident. Cool!

  40. Scray

    Show me someone who says otherwise and I’ll show you someone leaning hard on their looks/FAG (and when you adjust the chicks to their looks level, it won’t look so impressive)…or some other crutch.

    Seriously you guys with the hard case hard on should ease up a bit… less ego investment… there are millions of “normies” out there who get have gotten laid by good looking girls just by being normies… let’s not make everything so heroic…

  41. EhIntellect

    like working at a local restaurant – 14 y.o. kitchen duty, 16 y.o. waiting tables)

    Awesome experience builder… nice.

    as to your wife, she needs to transition into serving them from raising them… that’s her next step… and then she will be filled with their appreciation…

  42. @sentient

    Seriously you guys with the hard case hard on should ease up a bit… less ego investment…

    It’s not ego investment, it’s the truth.

    Once you adjust for the guy’s looks, most dudes in the game are just using them as a crutch or using FAG. Sorry.

    there are millions of “normies” out there who get have gotten laid by good looking girls just by being normies

    Exceptions that prove the rule.

    And honestly, normies being “normies” almost never get hotties for commitment free short-term sex. That’s borderline nonsense.

  43. Through their
    persisting anxiety and inability to contain their persisting hyperarousal symptoms,
    the primary caretakers build into their children a mirroring hyperarousal fear response—
    a form of vicarious traumatization. And, if the “caretaker” is the source
    286 Infant Mental Health Journal
    of the trauma, the child’s emotional survival depends on a zone of safety that includes
    new, true caretakers.
    Different events at different times in the life of an individual are likely to result
    in a different combination of adaptive responses. An infant, a child, and an adolescent
    experience the same event in different ways. What may be extremely traumatic
    for an adolescent may be a nonevent for an infant (e.g., the threat of an armed
    robbery). Conversely, there are many experiences that are likely to be traumatic for
    infants which are minimally threatening for adolescents (e.g., separation from primary
    caretakers). Factors related to the individual’s specific response to a given trauma
    include (1) prenaorbid functioning and history, specifically history of previous stressors;
    (2) age—the neurobiological response patterns appear to change with age; (3) specific
    cognitive meaning of an event for an individual; (4) the specific nature of the trauma;
    and (5) presence of exacerbating (loss of caretaker) or attenuating factors (e.g., early
    intervention).
    CONCLUSIONS
    Children and infants use a variety of adaptive response patterns in the face of threat,
    and, in a use-dependent fashion, internalize aspects of these responses, organizing
    the developing brain. There are a variety of neuropsychiatric symptoms that result
    when these patterns of neural activation persist. This has implications for research,
    clinical assessment, intervention, and prevention.
    More important, however, is that understanding the impact of experience on the
    developing child by using a neurodevelopmental conceptualization offers certain directions
    for our culture (Perry, 199), Profound sociocultural and public policy implications
    arise from understanding the critical role of early experience in determining
    the functional capacity of the mature adult — and therefore our society. Persistence
    of the destructive myth that “children are resilient” will prevent millions of children,
    and our society, from meeting their true potential. Persistence of the pervasive
    maltreatment of children in the face of decreasing global and national resources will
    lead, inevitably, to sociocultural devolution.
    It need not be so.

  44. Boys don’t always swallow society’s programming.

    They often get that some stuff is a secret between us men; they like it. It’s like a secret den.

    Off topic but a field report from last night.

    Me and another RP guy in a pub in an affluent semi country location outside London.

    Sit next to a couple of HB 6-7 – both early 30’s and overweight.

    Turns out one had been divorced twice and was advising the other on a jeweller friend. Apparently immediately she was engaged she takes the big fat bling 2 carat ring, gets a copy made which fools everyone and sells the real thing. Wears the fake until she cashes the old man out.

  45. Scray

    Come now

    And honestly, normies being “normies” almost never get hotties for commitment free short-term sex. That’s borderline nonsense.

    Haven’t you been in high school and college? social circles…

  46. Mark Dice trolls millennials asking “What the hell is wrong with your generation?” which is pretty funny in itself. He has other similar vids, such as asking people what they thought of Trump’s sons shooting tricerotops in Africa. Seems to be on the beach in SoCal all the time, so there’s definitely a self-selected pool he’s fishing in.

    But about half way through a couple of girls complain that no one approaches in real life, it’s all virtual. He riffs on that than they agree. Tiny confirmation of YaReally observations from his club scene.

  47. @sentient

    Haven’t you been in high school and college? social circles…

    that isn’t “normies” being “normies.” There are a lot of things happening there that apparently you aren’t aware of.

    like lol at you saying the college pussy scene = “normies” being “normies.”
    lmfao.

  48. After following along here for a few years, reading all the past blogs/comments and steadily applying my learnings (from other sites, too), I now believe I can say it’s been a successful turnaround from a BP marriage to one in which I now am captain and commander of me and my family.

    I am still awed from time-to-time at how much things have changed for the better. Not only with the wife, but with handling people in general. Many of the same principles apply to other social contexts like work environments and on that front my life has also improved dramatically.

    But more to the point, Rollo’s recent posts about LTRs and parenting have hit close to the mark and I’ve not noticed many examples of men actively/successfully working to turn a BP LTR with child into something I think most here would think traditional RP in nature. If anyone might find something useful in my experiences then I’m certainly willing to put it out there.

    There’s so much to discuss and go over, it can be overwhelming to know where even to start.

    If I say nothing else, I at least want to give a big heartfelt thanks to Rollo and each of you for shining a beacon of light for those of us adrift. Not all will be saved but in me you have another soldier for the cause.

  49. All of this reminds me of an observation from a psycho-physiology course I attented at university. The Dr giving the course mentionned that in the 1920s, it was fashionnable for upper-class parents to have their children lobotomized. Kept them real calm it seems.

  50. “I at least want to give a big heartfelt thanks to Rollo and each of you for shining a beacon of light for those of us adrift.”

    The story goes that Kaiser Wilhelm while observing Swiss military manuvers asked a Swiss militiaman: “You are 500,000 and you shoot well, but if we attack with 1,000,000 men what will you do?” The soldier replied: “We will shoot twice and go home.”

    Shine the beacon on two more men, just two, and you can go home.

  51. ” . . . in the 1920s, it was fashionnable for upper-class parents to have their children lobotomized. Kept them real calm it seems.”

    I used to know a guy whose father was a brain surgeon, and lobotomized his own son.

    Guy grew up to be a geologist.

  52. “I used to know a guy whose father was a brain surgeon, and lobotomized his own son.
    Guy grew up to be a geologist.”

    Was that last bit autocorrected from ‘scientologist’?

  53. The other day I nearly burst with pride while watching my son (10 yro) take that man-sized chainsaw and start cutting wood for the stove.

    I consciously give him tasks that require effort and problem solving. The wife’s idea of helping him consists of lowering the bar and/or giving hints and answers. She does this because it makes her feel bad to see him struggle. I scold her for putting her own feelz over the interests of the the boy. He needs to learn the sweet taste of victory only attainable from his own perseverance and will to succeed. Better to learn it in the safety and support in our nest instead of the hard way, like Daddy had to.

    The wife loves that I’m teaching him ‘manly’ things and literally asks me how she may serve me.

    A little perspective on the wife: she’s a big-city lawyer and raised with a grrrl power mindset. I boiled her frog so slowly that one day she paused, I saw the lights flicker in her head and then flat out told me I’m the only one that ever ‘broke’ her followed immediately by saying that she’s the happiest she’s ever been.

    This shit works.

  54. “Was that last bit autocorrected from ‘scientologist’?”

    Nope. Guy had the affect of a slate and found his emotional level in his profession.

  55. @Scray: what is FAG? I’d try looking it up but in this particular case I doubt I’d find what you meant.

    @KFG: is the geologist thing a joke?

  56. ” is the geologist thing a joke?”

    Ha, ha only serious. Yes, it’s a joke, but the particulars are facts.

  57. @IAS

    Fuck-Up Avoidance Game.

    Basically just keeping your mouth shut and letting the presumption of your alpha/beta trait ratio created by your looks work in your favor.

  58. @Tom

    As a father of a girl and awaiting the second one this is my problem too:

    “teaching them how to identify the right men in the Sexual Marketplace may prove to be an ongoing challenge”

    After my Red Pill transition I started to evaluate fellow men for their values. I don’t really see many men that I would find to be a good prospect as a husband. How the heck will she be able to find one?

  59. @blax

    lol sure dude.

    he’s 6’1 and 341 pounds with fairly prominent abdominal muscles (high bf if he were a bodybuilder but low bodyfat for a strongman)…liiiike, lmfao…

    i have some oceanfront property in nebraska to sell you.

  60. @pellaeon

    When you say club, my mind instantly pictures waiting in a long line to get into a room packed inch to inch with bodies with music blaring so loud that it physically hurts.

    Is this the same thing you’re taking about? My mind boggles at the idea of trying to START with that kind of environment. In my mind, I think of these as like – the boss level of learning game.

    to add what yareally posted in the last thread, #1 thing you do when you get there early is chat up the bartenders. easy to do “hey its slow now. seems nice, bet it gets crazy though later right? whats the worst night you had? oh man, I had a night like that at my work. it started with blah blah blah but yeah bad night. But you get through them. had some good nights too, like this one time blah blah so it all works out in the end.” and just use juggler method on them. That way when it gets busier you can get their attention by name “hey jason, quick question” and he’ll be responsive, you know his name, and its a major dhv if you’ve got a girl on you. You can bullshit this is your place you go to all the time, even if its your first one.

    Other thing to do is meet the lone people. There are usually early birds. They have friends that come in later. So just shoot the shit with them, doesn’t have to be anything fantastic, as they are generally bored and open to being opened. Now you are in tat group. A little later on, when you see that person with more people, just go up and say “Hey how’s it going Sally, introduce me to your friends.” and boom you are in with those people to. They’ll just assume you’re old friends or some shit.

    Then. take these early groups and merge sets. You can either introduce them to other people “hey, come with me, you gotta met this couple from Tanzistan. You know they actually hunt elephants in the nude? Nah I’m just fucking with you but you’re gonna want to meet them.” Or go solo and jump into new sets (which is much easier now that you’re pumped and have several HQs from all those people and bartenders you met early on) and then once you win them over, just take them to those sets you are already solid in.

    Depends on how social you are, but so long as you get there early and do the work early on getting to know people and your venue doesn’t suck then its really not that hard to work in nightclub. Most people there are scared shitless to and are very eager to meet someone who approaches them and introduces them to other people.

    Also, most hot girls don’t stay long. They are out around 11-12 so they can go to sleep at a decent hour and they aren’t gonna stay out late getting trashed and ruin their reputation.

    Nightclubs though are ideal because they have the highest concentration of attractive girls LOOKING to get picked up and its a fairly busy place where people EXPECT you to be sexual. That way you can fuck up repeatedly and no on really cares or remembers you. So nightclubs give you access to the maximum number of practice opportunities and is an inherently sexual environment that gets you used to being sexual fast. Once you master that, you can go into more sensitive areas, like daygame and social circle game, but since you are now experienced with game and being sexual, you can calibrate it to these more delicate environments and not fuck everything up.

    So thats were you have guys like me trying to do daygame in an area without girls I like…so I have to hunt for girls to practice on…only 30% at best of my time is spent actually gaming girls (its prolly more like 10% to 15%). Its mostly just trying to find girls I like.

    Plus daygame requires you to add in just a hit of sexuality and intent…buuut I haven’t even kissed a girl yet lol so that’s trickier.

    Pop by a nightclub and I could get in more practice in a few hours than I could get where I am now in a few months.

    Nightclubs are ideal for noobs since you get a ton of practice in fast, get experience being sexual and you can get laid faster here than anywhere else. THEN you can move on to other areas after you’ve got that initial experience in. Some guys just prefer social circle or daygame and that’s fine. But for getting started you can’t really match nightclubs.

  61. @scray

    ” he’s 6’1 and 341 pounds with fairly prominent abdominal muscles (high bf if he were a bodybuilder but low bodyfat for a strongman)…liiiike, lmfao…”

    Lol…okay dude. Here’s one for ya.

  62. @blax

    you seem to have missed the point.

    this dude is also a hormone monkey.

    you should go look at the natty fed records for the lifts (the ones that actually test)….

  63. @ Andras

    I accept my daughter’s impending hypergamous nature. She doesn’t need to be a clueless bitchy brat though. If she enters sexual life understanding what’s at stake (more partners = more dysfunction in life, mentally, socially), that’s pretty good.

    She’s already lined up her beloved (the ex-NFL quarterback’s 9 y.o. boy), is quiet about her natural desire to have him, but is always around his macho sports gang. She’s sly.

    “Can she bake a cherry pie, Billy boy” ain’t just a folk song, it’s a window into what girls, my daughter included, should deem valuable entering a relationship. What is she bringing other than sex? Is she sexually valuable as with a low N count? When serving and literally feeding man’s best nature, men will value her as she truly wants to be, thwarting the poisonous culture. Her beautiful light will burn strong, RP men desire this and will protect her from nastiness. Again, at this age I’m responsible for developing her high-order volition.

    I’ll broach the subject soon enough. 9’s a little young for these concepts, but she does learn by example at home, and that’s been progressing swimmingly.

  64. kfg
    Guy had the affect of a slate and found his emotional level in his profession.

    So he’s a real rock star?

  65. Oh this thought too:

    Fatherhood demands we walk the line of metering out experience, controlled frustration and failure, living as an example of sexuality that is understandable and healthy. RP can be cynically poisonous to some. Seeing life through the untrammeled prism healthy sex is liberating for my marriage and my daughter learns indirectly. When my daughter sees the wife kiss me with desire, she gets that within marriage, there is healthy, secure happiness with men, an allowable output for her tingles.

    When/how to find that guy? Consider the college scene. A young woman will experience, perhaps unknowingly, rapidly dwindling marriage options as she moves though her college years. As a freshman she could potentially score the LTR-to-marriage with all the guys in all the classes, but by the last grade, she’s really only available to those in her age class. A 18 y.o male freshman wouldn’t usually date for marriage a 22 y.o. senior, usually.

    By the time she leaves college, she’s on to the workplace with only a fraction of potential suitors that would fit the RP bill. She’s got to have full disclosure of what’s at stake before entering her “party years”.

  66. @EhIntellect, it’s the norm now for girls to party through college, then for the next few years afterwards. They say they want to marry, but it’s mostly “someday” which means at age 29.99.
    I see grad student and post doc girls in the 22 to 28 age group all the time with a mix of defiant “my way! ME!” and growing desperation. A lot of them have deeply inculcated the idea that bitchiness is the way of the “strong and independent” girl, so they are harder to approach and frankly not necessarily worth it for any LTR.

    Girls need to be taught a little deference, that snark isn’t cute or attractive.

  67. @ sfer

    One last thing and I’m off the weight thing. In highschool we had a 300 pound bench club. Practically the entire football team qualified, with a few exceptions, and even a bunch of baseball and track dudes did also. This was in the late 70’s. Teenagers.

    You got a nice T-Shirt with a barbell with the numbers ” 300 ” on them. I can assure you that NO ONE was using roids, unlike high school athletes today.

    I wont quibble with M&S because they are talking about the average gym dude trying to get strong, but they seem to set the numbers lower and call strong cats ” elite “. Idk too much about what they see going on in gyms or wherever.

    As an aside, I lifted damn heavy for 30 years and it never dawned on me, or anyone at the gyms I went to, to get ” rated ” by a federation. Maybe we all should have. Lol. Also, I have never done any klind of roid. I had family members who were ” Hormone Monkeys ” in the early days, and I was not a fan of all of the side effects.

    Every really strong guy is not automatically on roids. It’s more about genetics man.

  68. If you really want your daughter to get into a LTR in college send her to a school with a high M/F ratio like cal tech. Most colleges have low M/F ratios and that means that the high value dudes don’t want to get into a LTR and the dudes that do look needy. In a school with a high M/F ratio, the high value dudes race to tie up the cutest freshmen females each year.

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