Are Men Adapting to the New Sexual Marketplace?

I revisited the topic of Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW) last Saturday on Rule Zero. I don’t like rehashing old debates I’ve learned will ultimately go nowhere. You simply wont reach most people who don’t want to be reached. Once they’ve had some experiential lessons in life, reinforced it with the tribalistic need to affirm the beliefs derived from that experience and then invest their egos in them it becomes kind of pointless. I’m not saying just give up on people, far from it, but do understand what you’re up against. This is why I say unplugging men from the Matrix is dirty work, and a lot like triage. Know what’s worth expending energy for.

Most men, and nearly all women, don’t form a belief set based on multiple, independently funded, peer reviewed studies or statistical analyses. We go with experience first and then modify it from there.

I did a bit of preparation for this talk. My schedule last Saturday only permitted me an hour so I wanted to be succinct and throw out at least something new to the conversation. There’s a lot of tribalism in the Manosphere today and it’s no surprise that MGTOW as a tribe in growing – but likely not for the reasons most MGTOW would be willing to admit. MGTOW is becoming atomized and commercialized in the same manner as I predicted the Red Pill would (and has) last year.

What that means is MGTOW is rapidly becoming the same commercial vehicle for grifters that the Red Pill was just a year and a half ago. Life Coaches, Relationship Experts, Fitness Gurus, even Christian men’s ministry pastors are all looking online to find out ‘where have all the men gone?’ When men were found in the Red Pill this is where the grifters would coalesce. Thus, you had every ‘brand-of-me’ self-improvement hack calling himself “red pill”. A few of them still do. A few of them read verbatim from my book(s) and plagiarize it as their own. But more now I see these same grifters referring to themselves as MGTOW without realizing (or even caring) what it really means to men.

MGTOW is the new ‘brand’ that lifestyle ‘coaches’ are adding to their twitter profiles and YouTube channel About pages. They see the potential for growth by association. Even if they get owned in their comments and feeds, adding the tag MGTOW will draw clicks. A few of these ‘coaches’ had a familiarity with the tribe and decided to finally commit in the hopes that it would boost views, others are former ‘power-of-positivity‘ life-coaches who slide into MGTOW because the definition of what makes a man “go his own way” is so loose now that it can align with virtually anything the guy had written about before his new affiliation.

It’s a real short step from “Make yourself your Mental Point of Origin” to “Make yourself #1 in your life” and then to “Go your own way.” I’ve had at least four “dating experts” (one female) claim Mental Point of Origin was their own idea in their subscriber emails as recently as August. Grifters used the Red Pill and are now using MGTOW to legitimize their brands today. In 2015 the MRAs decided to appropriate the Red Pill as their own brand to name a feminist’s “journey of self-discovery” movie The Red Pill. This appropriation is continuing with MGTOW now.

As I said on the Red Man Group back in May, the Red Pill is going to have a real PR problem in the coming year. Everything I predicted in my State of the Manosphere address a year ago has come to pass and I predict it will only intensify in the 2020 election cycle. The Gender War needs a convenient, easy-to-hate villain to point to in order to reinforce the Future is Female narrative.

Very soon MGTOW will have the same PR problem. And once the next Eliot Rodger or Alex Minasian incident occurs you’ll see these grifters scatter from MGTOW like roaches when the lights come on. When there are dead women on the sidewalk somewhere, and the MSM is using terms like ‘MGTOW’, ‘Incel’ and ‘radicalization’ that is when all the ‘tribes’ of the Manosphere will throw each other under the bus. That’s when you’ll know who was ‘playing MGTOW’ for likes.

Adaptation

One thing this re-debate of MGTOW has made me reconsider is whether men are adapting to the new realities of the sexual marketplace or just looking to make their necessities a virtue. At its simplest MGTOW is men refusing to make women the measure of their lives, and then molding their lives to their own plan. This pairs nicely with virtually every pet ideology and ‘positivity’ grift in the ‘sphere today. Even Tradcons will agree with MGTOW if it means “Be the best man you can be“. It agrees with Mental Point of Origin. It agrees with Roissy – “You shall make your mission, not your woman, your priority.” It agrees with “Women should only ever be a complement to a man’s life, never the focus of it.

If that was all there was to MGTOW it would simply be Red Pill. What “MGTOW” life-coach grifters don’t realize is that MGOTW is a derivative of the Red Pill. I’ve always argued that once a guy becomes Red Pill aware he cannot help but live in some different fashion. Even the guys who go into complete denial can’t unsee the truths of intersexual dynamics. It’s what you actually do with that new awareness that sets apart Red Pill praxeology from MGTOW in practice. There’s more to MGTOW than just refusing to make women the measure of a man’s life – it’s also deciding what actually is deference to women. And that’s where it becomes highly subjective.

In my last post I outlined how women were upset there weren’t enough ‘eligible‘ men to marry in the current (westernized) sexual marketplace (SMP) today. Of course the two most common responses were either:

  • Women are the victims of the SMP they created. Women’s solipsistic, socially enabled entitlements to an ‘economically attractive’ man (a man who exceeds her own productivity by 58%) only proves the point that women’s social media bloated egos have made them unrealistic tyrants. Now their beliefs and actions have come home to roost.
  • This is proof-positive that MGTOW is working! Finally women are waking up to the realities of their beliefs and actions. If enough guys abandon the SMP altogether then women will be forced to come back to reality and choose men based on other criteria than ‘economic attractiveness’.

One point I struggled to make on last week’s show was that I wondered if MGTOW believed that, from an evolved perspective, men and women are better together than they are apart. Unfortunately, I didn’t have time to pursue that question in depth; do MGTOW largely believe that, if social circumstances were different, men and women evolved to be complements to the other and the best social outcome would be for the sexes to be together rather than segregated?

For the last 60 years feminism has effectively driven a wedge between men and women. The Gender War of today exists because of a systematic segregation between men and women (don’t @me with the cultural marxism/’evil juice’ shit for the moment). Honestly, I’m sick of reading about how negative it is to merely point out the realities of this ‘gender cold war’ by Success Porn grifters, but is not MGTOW an adaptation to this segregation? Is not MGTOW an exacerbation of this segregation. When I read mantras like ‘Dogs, Dudes and Dolls’ it sounds an awful lot like ‘Cats, Girlfriends and Vibrators’.

Is MGTOW an adaptation to the conditions in a sexual marketplace that was (and still is) contrived by feminism/gynocentrism?

The following quote is from a long time commenter and friend Deti. This was from a larger discussion that began here if you want to get some context. Sorry guys, I just don’t have the space to repost the whole thread, but I don’t want this to get lost. Hopefully, it will inspire further discussion in this post’s comments:

I read Novaseeker as saying in his comments on this post, that women have adapted within this particular milieu. In other words, women noted the changes and have adapted to them. It helps that the changes were geared to them and prepared with them in mind. But women have adapted, and men have not.

About 100 years ago, it was all geared toward men and the sexual and marriage marketplaces were prepared with men in mind. They were prepared to advantage men and disadvantage women. Women responded to and lived within that milieu in a number of ways.

Using soft power, manipulation, deceit, subterfuge, behind the scenes machinations. Most women were more or less OK with marrying an OK guy, having OK sex, and living an OK life.

Of course, sometimes women cheated on the downlow. Sometimes women cuckolded husbands. I mean real actual traditional definition of cuckolding, which is a married woman getting pregnant by an Alpha and passing the child(ren) off as the Beta Husband’s. There’s no way to know how often that happened, but it wasn’t really rare – Maybe anywhere from 5 to 20% of children then weren’t fathered by their bio-moms’ husbands. In rare cases, not marrying and becoming spinsters, living as bohemians or as “favorite cousins” or “favorite aunts” with male relatives, working as teachers or seamstresses or some other job, and being live in nanny/maid. In rare cases, divorcing and living off family money or a husband’s alimony money. Living as widows and not remarrying.

The point is that women learned how to adapt. There are a lot of reasons for that, but they did adapt.

The main responses men have used today to adapt to changing circumstances have been:

  1. Game/PUA/Seduction – Use the changes to men’s advantage and go for easy sex and the bachelor lifestyle.
  2. MRA – Fighting the changes to advocate for either equalizing the laws or rolling them back to a return to Marriage 1.0 and pre-sexual revolution status.
  3. MGTOW – Check out of the new system, refuse to support or participate in it, and eschew relationships with women to varying degrees.

About, oh, 20 years in, I think we can safely say that option 2) is dead in the water and has been for some time. About the only real reforms here are that divorce and family laws are slowly, very, very slowly, moving toward 50/50 residential custody and away from alimony (except in the case of longer term marriages with breadwinner spouse/dependent nonemployed wife). Unless you have been married more than 20 years and support a housewife, you probably will not be paying alimony except for temporarily. Thats about the entire sum and substance of how “equal” it’s going to get between men and women.

That leaves 1) Game; and (3) MGTOW.

It’s hard to tell what will come out of this. I think we can say:

• Marriage 1.0 is dead and we are never going back to it for at least 2 more generations. If you think you’re going to have a “traditional marriage” where you don’t have to do much to maintain it or you can let up on your attractiveness levels, think again. Because that is not going to happen. If you’re going to marry a woman, you need to improve your attractiveness, marry a woman who is not financially dependent on you, and cultivate your own life separate and apart from her. You need a contingency plan in the event the marriage goes south. And with all that, you need to consider whether you want to risk bringing kids into the mix. You absolutely need a prenuptial agreement, even if it gets judicially torn up or modified later.

The bottom line is, people are still marrying, it’s just that it’s all being pushed out later and later, and people are staying single longer and spending less time married. Many women are meeting the men they eventually marry in their early to mid 20s, and then marrying in their late 20s and early 30s. That’s a paradigm that’s increasing in frequency; this idea of long term dating and engagements lasting 2 to 5 years while both the man and woman establish their careers.

If you want long term relationships you should consider marriage alternatives like living together, or being exclusive while living apart. You absolutely must avoid at all costs these polyamory/polygyny situations, and open marriages. You absolutely must avoid women who want to continue AF’ing it even after they marry. That must be an absolute no go, not an option, ever.

• Men have to improve and increase their sexual attractiveness to create, maintain, and sustain relationships with women. You can’t let up here. That’s IF you want relationships with women.

• More and more men will go pure MGTOW and will severely minimize if not eliminate their relationships with women. For a growing number of men, this option is going to be the best one, because (a) they did the work and still couldn’t attract women; or (b) they don’t want to do the work and it’s easier to stay as is than to try.

For most men, avoiding women entirely, except for paying hookers, is a no go. The thirst is that strong. The male sex drive is that potent. Most men want to have some contact with women, even if it’s just random hookups now and again. And the only way to do that is to make yourself as sexually attractive as possible. That just is so. Women are the ones who pick sex partners, and they have no problem with sharing attractive men with other women. So if you want sex partners, you have to make yourself sexually attractive. And you have to know male and female sexual nature, so that you know what you’re getting into, you know what you’re seeing, you know what women are doing, and you know what women really mean when they talk.

For men, improving one’s own attractiveness increases one’s power in the market. It increases his ability to control some of the selection process. It gives him an abundance mentality. It gives him the power to walk away from situations that disadvantage him. It gives him the ability to tell women “no” and to reject women who cannot or will not give him what he wants and needs.

On the other hand, going your own way can also increase your power in the market. It maximizes your control over your own life. It sharply reduces your responsibilities to others, and increases your opportunities. It frees up your resources to expend the way you want. Sharp reductions in responsibility means a sharp reduction in the needed resources for day to day living, meaning you can work less and increase your leisure time.

I think that more and more men will go pure MGTOW, which is essentially “make the best of a tough situation, be single, and don’t have a family. At least that’s better than getting divorce raped and it’s less work than going to the gym, getting in shape, and eating clean. This way I can eat what I want and work 30 hours a week, and live by myself in my apartment”. It’s kind of similar to women 100 years ago, where the path of least resistance was for Bertha BigGirl, Martha Dumptruck, and Plain Jane to “find a decent, OK man to support me, and probably have at least 3 of his kids. At least it’s better than living with Mom until she dies, and then having to live with my brother and his wife, and taking care of their kids.” And similar to the spinster, the MGTOW will be low status, or at least perceived as low status. But for the spinster and the MGTOW, their lifestyles will be at least better than whatever else they could have gotten.

Guys, Nova is absolutely correct in that men by and large are not adapting.

I think that what’s going on is that many men are saying “want to stay the same, don’t want to do a lot of work, but I still want women to be attracted to me and to be able to date a lot and eventually get married and have a family like (a) mom and dad had when I was growing up; or (b) like I didn’t get to have growing up.” Well, you can’t have that, at least not without working for it. If you want something you’re going to have to work for it. If you want women and sex, you’re going to have to make yourself attractive to women. And the way you’re going to do that, the only way to do that, is to stand out. And the way you stand out is by improving every area of your life – your job, your body, your finances, your lifestyle, your hobbies, your social acumen, and everything else that involves you going through your life.

The funny thing is that when a man stops caring so much about it, forgets about women, and sets about improving his life, he starts attracting women.

That’s the current state of things, I think.

I don’t disagree that we’re presently at a turning point in intersexual relations. After the advent of unilaterally female controlled birth control and the Sexual Revolution that followed the upheaval in how men and women come together and relate was inevitable. Now that we’re 50 odd years past that point we’re figuring out how reproduction, love, marriage, and something as simple as boy-meets-girl is going to look for future generations. The internet and a social media acculturation on a global scale has seen to it that it will likely never look like it did under the old social contract. There’s a theory that post-agrarian societies experienced a similar shift in intersexual dynamics in our ancestral past. Socially enforced monogamy was the obvious intersexual shift.

Right now we’re seeing a similar shift in intersexual relations. Is it simply better for men and women to live segregated lives? I don’t believe so, but it seems like a larger cultural narrative believes it’s time for both men and women to go their own ways. Until one side concedes, fuck any notion of evolved complementarity is the narrative I guess.

I do disagree with Deti in that I think men are adapting. They always have. It’s that the adaptation is counter to what we might hope is the natural order between men and women.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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Blaximus
” There is NO counter-culture “….

Amen.

Define terms. I know some men who are pretty counter cultural – married to one woman, 4+ children, hold down a job, keep wife busy, go to their church, help other people – all counter cultural by the standards of modern culture. They also homeschool and are staying “under the radar”.

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Not enough numbers.

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So, while this topic deals with grifters and an increasing number of would-be bandwagon hopping get-rich guys leveraging the burgeoning size of the Manosphere for profit…what’s the latest status of the delusion narcissist Pipe Dream Johnson? Last I checked, signs pointed to Poland not being as great as it “should” have been, and he was melting down on Twatter constantly screaming into the void for no reason. Anyone know if his audience shrank and dried up to blow away in the wind or is he still kicking about insisting he’s going to be a billionaire someday? (Because we all know… Read more »

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AR What I mean is, social media is so massive that it renders ” normal ” damn near invisible. I’ve lived smack in the middle of ” counter culture ” before, and it was massive without social media – hence it was never truly homogenized the way everything is today. There are tangible reasons why we are inundated with suicides, mass shootings and ” The Gay LGBTBBQ ” when we were not before. This shit is driving way too many people stark raving mad. The only way I knew what some dude in L.A. was thinking about anything was a)… Read more »

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“So, while this topic deals with grifters and an increasing number of would-be bandwagon hopping get-rich guys leveraging the burgeoning size of the Manosphere for profit…what’s the latest status of the delusion narcissist Pipe Dream Johnson?”

Johnson is following The Formula.

The Manosphere started out organic, and he’s trying to monetize and brand it. In order to maximize profitability, the ” sphere ” has to be sanitized for mass consumption.

Oh yeah, women must be included because ( current year ).

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Blaximus
Not enough numbers.

How many kids you got, again?

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Blaximus What I mean is, social media is so massive that it renders ” normal ” damn near invisible. Lol, I used to know this guy who insisted that social media didn’t mean much because he didn’t do it and his woman didn’t do it and so there. Or something like that. I’ve lived smack in the middle of ” counter culture ” before, and it was massive without social media – hence it was never truly homogenized the way everything is today. So “things are different now”, is that what you’re saying? There are tangible reasons why we are… Read more »

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Blaximus
Oh yeah, women must be included because ( current year ).

Lol. Pretty much.
Branding! Gotta keep The Brand fresh!

Hey, hey, maybe he can recruit Julian and the new Mrs. Julian? Wife-Life Coaching!
Worked so well for Athol Kay.

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AR I has 2 biological daughters, 1 stepdaughter. ” Huh. So YaReally actually had a point about social media’s effects on people, specifically girls, after all?” Nah, yareally had a very different point ( ALL girls have 10,000 orbiters and fly off to Dubai to get pissed on by wealthy princes…blah, blah , blah…). He always missed a vital point – that this stuff is not real – and that was and is my point. Exaggerating how everyone gets what they want via social media is not correct. Girls have always had the choice to have as much sex as… Read more »

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test

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Blaixmus I has 2 biological daughters, 1 stepdaughter. Right, while the homeschooling families I know of have 4+ children in their counter-cultural subculture — but you judge them to be “not enough”, right? Lol. Nah, yareally had a very different point ( ALL girls have 10,000 orbiters and fly off to Dubai to get pissed on by wealthy princes…blah, blah , blah…). He always missed a vital point – that this stuff is not real – and that was and is my point. That was one of his more exaggerated points, but not the only one. Exaggerating how everyone gets… Read more »

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Author here. Currently writing a story that has a matriarchy as the political structure. I’m looking to discuss with this community ideas and possible problems with my premise. Anyone interested?

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“OT GirlsDoPorn getting sued, with one of their stars listed by name.” not even close to OT. dude was trying to get a gf in the modern marketplace… “Monday, a judge denied Girls Do Porn’s filing to “stay,” or halt, the civil trial in the wake of the federal charges.” oops. now he fights criminal and civil cases simultaneously lol all the cash he made in pron now goes to lawyers and his actual cost per lay when it’s all over is perfectly indicative of his place in sexual hierarchy he thought he could buy a sex slave… now he… Read more »

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“Ask people over 50 if they have smartphones -some don’t – . . .” I went out on a call last week to configure a new phone for an over 50. It was a landline. Except for a few cheap, crappy POTS sets marketed to seniors and outbackers all new phones are smartphones – some just hide it better than others. My $25 flip phone can launch a browser and connect to the Internet. All connections are smart, including POTS, and POTS is being forcibly decommissioned everywhere it can be. Of course the usefulness of POTS has largely been destroyed… Read more »

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@SeaStories$$$:

See David Brin’s Glory Season.

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kfg
Of course the usefulness of POTS has largely been destroyed by smart telemarketing anyway.

A POTS landline with an answering machine makes a pretty good spamtrap.

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@seestories

“Author here. Currently writing a story that has a matriarchy as the political structure. I’m looking to discuss with this community ideas and possible problems with my premise. Anyone interested”

matriarchy is sometimes defined as “form of social organization in which the mother or oldest female is the head of the family …”

However in current western culture the mother or oldest female does not have the most power. That goes to females that have high SMV. Thus Kim Kardashian does not want to dress modestly for her husband, since it decreases her power.

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If love were real, there wouldn’t have been billions of abortions. Love, quite frankly, is a load of horse schitt. It’s fostered in culture so that people spend max money. It’s fostered in culture so that people get married, because even though marriage is horrific for men, marriage works best for women and the state. It’s fostered in culture so that a regular crop of new wage slaves are born, because procreation. It’s fostered so the fruits of men’s excess labor and production are either voluntarily transferred to women via women’s sucker husband or forcefully transferred to women via women’s… Read more »

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“So many things in life, when you get right down to it, are utter and complete fantastical horse schitt.”

Yes they are.

“It takes are really strong person to accept this reality.”

Yes it does.

“Most cannot, because most are weak.”

Granted. So what? What do you do about that?

“Love, quite frankly, is a load of horse schitt.”

Depends. It can be lovely or shitty depending on how you wield the tool. Or the desire or the intention. It can be not for nothing.

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I read Novaseeker as saying in his comments on this post, that women have adapted within this particular milieu. In other words, women noted the changes and have adapted to them. It helps that the changes were geared to them and prepared with them in mind. But women have adapted, and men have not. LMFAO women “adapted”? For what? Legal theft? It’s like saying “bankers ‘adapted’ within this particular millieu(fractional banking and printing money out of thin air), which makes it possible to theft from people free”. Right? Bankers “noted the (legal) changes” and “have adapted to them”, and by… Read more »

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200 years ago men owned their children, which meant they could form estates and even dynasties, working for resources to be handed down the generations. That’s what they got. That’s what women had to offer in exchange for the protection and security provided by men and the risk of childbirth was considerably higher than it is now.

The deal might still have favored women in many ways, but it wasn’t too terrible for men.

But then they took the children away.

Security Analyst
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If that is the case then why don’t YOU the so called “GODFATHER OF THE MANOSPHERE” invite TFM on your THE RED MAN GROUP again ? Last time i remember it was 6 v/s 1 and even then he ripped your a new one, even YOU were looking like a simp in front of him, especially DONOVAN SHARPE. Second of all, are not men demonized daily ??? Just for being men ?? And if that is the case , then why would you care about MGTOW philosophy, its doesn’t tell to kill anybody or do harm to other people, Yes… Read more »

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I expect that there will be more and more incels, and due to this more NEETS and expats (together with a decline in the birth rate). In the medium term this can create a huge crisis. You can read about this thesis and more in my blog Hypergamy Kills:
https://hypergamykills.blogspot.com/

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If you want woman and sex you can hire a prostitute, because beside her vagina is there is no reason to have a woman around, you can rent a decent one for €100- per hour and not be in any financial danger and the best thing is after the deed the bitch leaves…

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Monogamy is an artificial construct. Back in the early days of humankind then we where living in tribes during the hunter-garter era all the men was having intercourse with all the woman. A varity of genetic material and DNA was very valuable so all the men breed with all the women. If we think of a hunter tribe consisting of 4 males and 4 females. If only one man (Alpha) breed with the four women it would lead to incest and no beneficial blood mixing later then the children did grow up. So it is my belief that all four… Read more »

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You have to base current behaviours on hunter gatherers. Agriculture is when it all become fucked up. Finance, commerce and all that bullshit. 14,000 years? A fraction of human evolution.

So, you have to use the pre-agriculture years as a metric for human sexual behaviour.

Security Analyst
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well then if you are UNCEREMONIOUSLY removed from your creation, then invite hm for a one on one interview on your own youtube channel,he has been de-platformed & demonetized for uttering the word “MGTOW” anyways from youtube, He is right now on Bitchute,so please call him and take his answer or any other guy like Hammerhand, Undead Chronic, etc. If you are REALLY concerned about MGTOW & their philosophy.

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2011Met my 75 yr old widow lady. In 10 days who lost her husband 5 yrs ago I lost my wife 6 mo ago, we made love 8 days later, she askrd me to go to bed w her, we loved 3 times then I left. Movrd in w her made love nighty until my 85 th birthday. Coild not erection hopimg ..DX AMP MALE PERF FORM WORK 4 ME TONIGHT ..WILL TAKE 2 POLLS NOE AT 7:00pm . will DX AMP HELP ME TONIGHT???

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