I added this video today to illustrate a point, watch it carefully and with a Red Pill Lens. In this post-sexual revolution 2017 there is a strong want for the fulfillment of what I call the Old Books socio-sexual model goals. I’ll be impressed if you can stomach even half of the boilerplate ‘Man Up’ message in this video, but watch it carefully because it illustrates the dichotomy of a social order that’s been founded on feminine-primacy for over six decades now.
On a side note, I think it should be recognized that even ostensibly conservative thought leaders often toe the line for the Feminine Imperative more effectively than the progressives they attempt to disparage. I’m not going to riff on this video as I think most of my readers will understand the subtext being communicated here, but it’s an interesting exposé of the old books expectation of “doing the right thing”. Granted, it’s the same message of shaming men for exactly what I covered in Are You Experienced? Only this time the shame for men comes from another man (we’re supposed to respect?) while he attempts to sell the same message that Sheryl Sandberg does in Open Hypergamy,… Be like Ward Cleaver (he’s a stud) and in time, nothing’s sexier.
When we consider that western cultures have consolidated on feminine social primacy, and a women’s-needs-first way of interpreting any social dynamic, things get a bit easier when you distill the intent down from a social scale to a personal scale. What’s being related in this video is the desire to socially, culturally, change the definition of what should be considered “sexy” by women in spite of all evolved arousal and attraction cues they’re subject to. The presumption this is based upon is that attraction is a social construct and therefor something that can be changed.
If a man does everything by the book, if he does everything right, if he accepts the responsibilities feminine-primacy expects of him, he can be considered an adult, and he can assume his chances of being considered ‘sexy’ by women and certainly his own wife. In so accepting this definition of his burden of performance women will appreciate the equity he accrues in the relationship by investing himself in it.
From a Red Pill perspective we see this for what it is, the old books social contract that is still being sold to a generation of men who increasingly are seeing it for the life-changing lie it is. However, I’ll have you note the final summation of the video where men are encouraged to see adulthood as getting married, becoming a father and working hard to buy a home. I could argue that there are no June Cleavers left in the world or that getting married is a high-risk, low yield gamble. I could argue that becoming a father only makes a man fall in line with the ridiculous or hated caricature popular culture has made of them. I won’t even start on the risks of the housing market.
For all of this, the desire is still a return to a social contract wherein men are conditioned to believe that they will be rewarded for doing everything right. That old school notion has become the Beta bait of the past 3 generations.
As I mentioned in the last installment of this series, most men who are ‘awakened while married’ want to apply their Red Pill awareness in such a way that they might achieve this idyllic state that the guy in this video assures us is possible if we’d all just Man Up. Most married Red Pill (MRP) men are looking to save their marriages. They see it as a key to getting a woman to appreciate his investment in her, in their kids, in his marriage, his dedication to ‘doing everything the right way’,
Much in the same way that single Red Pill guys will (initially) focus on Red Pill awareness and Game in order to eventually connect with their Dream Girls, so too does the MRP guy. The difference being that he’s convinced he’s already married to his dream girl and the only thing between him and that ideal life with her is finding the formula to achieve the life-plan this video elaborates.
As I said before, most married men’s first intent when they unplug isn’t to divorce their wives, hit the clubs and spin plates. His first thought is “how do I get her to come around to appreciating me?” or “How do I get back to the kind of sex we had (or I think we could)?” I think it’s important for men, both Red Pill singles and MRP to disabuse themselves of the Blue Pill goals they think might ever be achievable with Red Pill awareness. I say this because it put that awareness into the perception of it being a cure to their problems. While it may seem noble to a newly unplugged guy to want to use his new superpower of Red Pill awareness for good (not for evil) and valiantly use it to do the right thing for his wife, his desire to do so is still founded in a Blue Pill conditioning that’s taught him he’ll be appreciated for it.
It may be that his new Alpha impression on his wife isn’t something she will ever recognize or accept as ‘the real him’. And while this frustration plays out in his marriage, he also sees the positive responses from women outside his marriage – women unfamiliar with his Beta past – who readily respond to the Game he applies. That new positive reinforcement with outside women contends with his wife’s negative reinforcement inside his marriage.
The following quote was part of a comment from ollieoxenfree in last week’s thread:
Who sees you as a viable long term option and is eager to please (in fact has pleased on many occasions) but is aware you may never reciprocate in kind. Will he waste his best years coveting something he may never have? Wouldn’t it be better to entertain a slightly lesser, suitor and be their top priority?
If a wife can no longer give of herself, does she still see fit to demand the level of investment as when she did? Can a man still appreciate the tacit approval his wife offers him, in not questioning his whereabouts when he’s engaged in an extramarital affair. Does she show affection and support in other ways?
The truth is most women under the influence of the Feminine Imperative don’t support their partners, nor cultivate an understanding with them in regards to the limits of their sexual capacity.Men, for their part, like to think sexual intercourse with their partners, will always be available, given time and circumstance. The reality is, it isn’t.
Our biologies weren’t meant to tolerate these conditions. Especially with a woman who will constantly shit test you and emasculate you, in every conceivable way she can divine.A woman will invariably condemn you for your weakness, but expect understanding for hers.
Common Experiences
There is a school of thought about being Red Pill and married that believes that getting a wife (or LTR girlfriend) to accept the ‘new you’ as being impossible. Things may nominally improve due to Dread working, but your new Red Pill marriage will never be what you want it to be because you have improved, she hasn’t and she never wanted you this way in the first place.
I don’t accept this assessment in its entirety, however I do see where this sentiment comes from. Most men who are awakened while married are men who followed the same script as the men I illustrate in Betas in Waiting. These are the men who have ‘done everything right’ for the better part of their lives. They cultivated themselves to be the perfect providers that Sheryl Sandberg would have women believe will be waiting for them when their looks begin to fade and it’s time to cash out of the SMP. These are the men who believe their hard work and perseverance is finally paying off with a women who now find him irresistible because he represents their salvation in long term security and parental investment.
Most women entering their Epiphany Phase are expressly looking for a Beta to take care of them now that the Party Years are coming to an end for her. They’re (ostensibly) done with the Bad Boys (something they had to ‘grow out of’) and now want to do things ‘the right way’. This, of course, suits a Beta in Waiting just fine because his Blue Pill conditioning has prepared him by expecting him to ‘do things the right way’ and to believe any woman wanting to do the same must be a Quality Woman.
These men believe their ship has finally come in, but because of this these men are often the most difficult to unplug. They have the hardest time with Red Pill awareness because in accepting it they must also accept that what led up to their marriage to that Quality Woman was also a result of their Blue Pill conditioning. A lot of their ego is invested in Beta Game and Blue Pill convictions, but also a forced-convincing of themselves that they did everything right and were rewarded for it.
This is why it’s a bitter pill to swallow when that guy’s wife drip-feeds him sex, or he discovers her sexual best was reserved for another man in her past, or she tells him she loves him, but she’s not in love with him. Even in the face of outright disrespect or his Beta confirmations of failed shit tests, he’ll still refuse to acknowledge his state. Often it’s only prolonged sexlessness (and even this is rationalized for a long time) that motivates him to seek the answers of Red Pill awareness.
The Beta in Waiting never had Frame before or during his marriage. In fact, it was just that lack of Frame that made him marriage material for his wife. He was never “Alpha” for her, and in his equalist mindset he believed this was what set him apart and attractive then.
So going from this very strong Beta initial impression to an Alpha position of dominance can be all but impossible – particularly if his self-confirmed status was that of being a proud Beta.
There are other men who’ll report having had an Alpha status prior to their marriage, but they lost it somewhere along the way. They were the Alpha backsliders who possibly entered into the marriage with a dominant Frame, but this dissolved as his wife’s Frame or insecurities about him came to dominate their relationship. I think this is likely the scenario that provides the most believability when a man becomes awakened while married, because it is a return to a prior impression (or one his wife had hoped he’d find) and therefor more believable when he does.
The ‘tamed’ Alphas are also the guys with wives who’ll try to actively minimize his Red Pill transformation. Their wives are simultaneously aroused by this rekindling of his Alpha dominance and fearful that he will come to see her as the failed investment she likely is for him. That may or may not be the actual case for him, but for her it will prompt possessiveness, surveillance and a control over how he’s allowed to ‘appropriately’ express this dominance – which in turn disqualifies it.
In the last installment of this series I will outline some ways in which a Red Pill man might go about internalizing this transformation, how that might manifest itself in an authentic way, and also the pitfalls to be aware of that can stifle it.
“Re: IB – Finally understand her problem. She’s never really submitted. She “dommes from the bottom” and of course this is never satisfying to a woman the way true submission is.” Problem? What problem? If course I do, that is 90% of the fun. Why in the world would any woman submit to a man that is not worthy of submitting too? And how would you ever know if he was worthy if you didn’t test for his edges? Nevermind, whatever. I am actually pretty happy, content. And quite grateful to be reading David Deida. He’s fabulous. I like him… Read more »
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4d8Xtj_Mkbo
Demure, coquetteish, sweet – this is feminine.
@ Blax Yes, unfortunately, I have had much experience with loud bullshit artists. They are the ones who talk their way into positions of power. I have recognized that I am a recovering “get the job done” blue pill careerist. Blax, you may have become so familiar certain aspects of Trump, that you lose sight of the whole picture. I remember, criticizing Michael Jackson’s Superbowl performance. His freeze move—stupid. His vocals—weak. My friend stopped me with, “The man can dance, you’ve got to respect that!” My admiration was based his interview performance as POTUS, and not on his past performances.… Read more »
For my generation (empirical field report!) the Deida II model has worked pretty well, especially and only when the man has avoided or overcome betaization, and kept or reclaimed his MPO. As a 70+ guy, I’m really interested in how things turn out in the longer run. I’m interested in long game. One of the reasons I keep reading TRM is to follow along with guys as they (along with myself) wrestle with all these manosphere issues. I’m a pragmatist and an empiricist: “How’s that working for you, long term?” is my question. As a long time lurker (empirical field… Read more »
“If “Alpha” by definition means one who dominates . . .”
Why do you think the first element of an ordered set was chosen?
Try this rephrasing on for style: I have no problem with being elite dominant. As I have said before, I am not an elitist a dominator, I am elite Dominant. The former is a philosophical statement, the latter an objective statement. @Insanitybytes “So many of you guys are like, I want her to be weak and fragile, exceedingly submissive, so my baseline masculinity can remain low too, and then I’ll never have to embrace who I really am and come face to face with it. It’s all her fault, she’s just not weak enough.” You so totally fucking made that… Read more »
“My hope is that he is striving for a lasting legacy . . . ”
He isn’t there to be a good leader. He isn’t there to be a good president. He’s there to do this to history:
http://media.gettyimages.com/videos/exterior-shots-of-the-trump-tower-in-manhattan-with-signage-and-on-video-id517114230?s=640x640a
Is he a narcissistic conman? You betcha. But given the goal of the con, if he pulls it off, we’ll actually be OK for it.
Go figure.
@Marko – Dated and fucked lawyers, top corp execs, fashion designer who owned a decent sized label – probably more “alpha” women than you have. None of them was happy deep down inside. None. And they all responded to dominance. All before “falling down the PUA rabbit hole” – you are an arrogant fuck, aincha? Example: 40yo superwaspy, very fit fashion designer. Consumed with her business but miserable. First time we were going to fuck, she broke down crying, ashamedly admitting to me that she’d had 3 abortions and that she knew I’d disapprove. Then went on to tell me… Read more »
Edit: I meant to say “arrogant, know-nothing, loudmouthed, pretentious windbag of a cunt”.
“For my generation (empirical field report!) the Deida II model has worked pretty well, especially and only when the man has avoided or overcome betaization, and kept or reclaimed his MPO.” No one is denying that. And I will grant you that. It worked for you. What’s to deny about that. That was your ERA and it was the norm. You were a successful guy and you adapted and you had agency. The Red Queen Hypothesis (I inadvertently used the term Red Pill Hypothesis by mistake the other day) would be a cautionary word on the fact that things change… Read more »
I meant to say “arrogant, know-nothing, loudmouthed, pretentious windbag of a cunt”.
No Bunky? You have mellowed, Scrib.
“Scrib, whose writings I used to appreciate so much, seems to have completely fallen down the PUA rabbit hole. Just a word on Scribbler. I would validate him for Doing the Work. Going down the rabbit hole was a fantastic thing for him and I’m glad he’s not six feet under now (which he would have been had he made the red pill and game plunge). Don’t underestimate, moralize or disavow what he is doing is best for his own enlightened self interest, nor claim that it is not part of The Red Pill Brand. He is adapting to what… Read more »
“He isn’t there to be a good leader. He isn’t there to be a good president. He’s there to do this to history: (video of Trump Tower)”
Ayn Rand’s The Fountainhead all over again.
“Is he a narcissistic conman? You betcha. But given the goal of the con, if he pulls it off, we’ll actually be OK for it.
Go figure.
The Fountainhead was about “individualism versus collectivism, not in politics but within a man’s soul”.
@SJF
RE: January 27, 2017 at 9:22 am, Rush Trees Video, Clicked play and assumed the shape of a crumpled ball on the floor—which is my way!
In the Official TRM Comments Game stats, you are credited with an assist at an attempt at humor! I can’t say if the ball went in the hoop, but I was self-amused.
@SJF – Indeed. The air is very fresh here…Ditto for you. You DID THE WORK too. In some ways it’s easier for married guys in that they have opportunities to game and use RP knowledge nonstop. So interesting to watch your development. Funniest about Marko? I guess his hindbrain, his limbic mind is not typically male as nubility and fecundity are huge signals that trigger attraction in a woman. Except for him, of course. Lol. Typical Blue Piller, using TRM and RP as a buffer. He’s old, too late for him to change much I guess. But he should just… Read more »
ooops, meant HIJAB of course. I should edit before I post, not after, lol…
“Down 8lbs since the first of the year.” Nice… a few months more of this and all your concerns about body will disappear… Now that I’m not scrambling around trying to “prove” myself, I’m a bit more lazy.. I do less but get more done that is important to me. Yeah… you have the experience to do what is necessary at a high level at the right time… so much of what we do is really needless. There was a time I would concoct an elaborate three paragraph email, constructed over a month of wordsmithing and debating colleagues and such…… Read more »
When she did, it was like the earth split in two, she hadn’t had a man give her a good O in years. I don’t mind an older woman… but my interactions are all ONS so they are swept up in the moment if it is going anywhere. If they are bitchy and downers, which many can be, we never get there and never see them again. But it is fun, taking that 40’s woman who has been getting shitty service forever and utterly destroying her… so many deer in the headlights looks… it can be a bit embarrassing for… Read more »
@Sentient – Ya, that fashion designer was positively girly and gooey and a bit embarrassed after. But her conditioning was wired in deep and she could not help reverting to form. So yeah, the sex was fine, but anything more, bad idea. And she didn’t smell that badly…
“Funniest about Marko? I guess his hindbrain, his limbic mind is not typically male as nubility and fecundity are huge signals that trigger attraction in a woman. Except for him, of course. Lol. Typical Blue Piller, using TRM and RP as a buffer. He’s old, too late for him to change much I guess. But he should just shut the fuck up…” @ Marko Don’t get offended at that statement from Scribbler. It’s just his way of energizing himself with a morning rant. Totally operating procedure. And he means what he says. But don’t worry about it. This is about… Read more »
No, Marko, ignore SJF. This isn’t a cafeteria and all points of view aren’t equal. Be insulted, you should be. And as for me needing a rant to get my day going, that’s just SJF’s projection. I don’t mind, he’s a great man that I admire. But I fully intend to fuck with you, and would do so any time of day. Cuz you are a ponce.
It’s an indictment of modern churchianity that what most believe is the Divine nature of men and women must be mutually exclusive from the complementarity of our evolved natures. The problems that I or Dalrock or Donalgraeme reveal about contemporary Christianity has less to do with actual faith and everything to do with how it’s been distorted by an imperative whose ideologies run entirely counter to anything like the Divine natures of men and women they’d hope to convince us of. Be less concerned about me mentioning Jesus every 3rd sentence and more concerned with the Feminine supremacist rot in… Read more »
LOL “I fully intend to fuck with you” Shit test delivered. What are you going to do about that Marko? Like I said, I know Scribbler and he always says what he means and really means what he says. He’s a lover, not a fighter….But he’s also a fighter…..so don’t get any ideas….. The Alpha Game Plan: The Alpha attitude is the attitude you need to assume to be attractive to women to the maximum level. The attitude is this: “In words, actions and omissions I speak, move and behave in such a way that I never ask for forgiveness… Read more »
“Be less concerned about me mentioning Jesus every 3rd sentence and more concerned with the Feminine supremacist rot in the church you unthinkingly participate in.”
I’m far more concerned by the bitterness and rot in your own soul Tomassi, and how the fruits of that nihilism are seen in the men here. Same too with Donal, Dalrock, and Vox, all Christian men who really don’t know Jesus Christ at all. That used to puzzle me. It doesn’t anymore. You’re all trapped in your own deceptions and thinking yourselves wise, you became fools.
Hey Scrib, did I get your goat? You can have it back.
SJF seems right on with his thought that you are where you need to be in your process.
I’m rooting for you, and all the guys that post here. I’m rooting for myself, too, You present as very angry and in not very happy place — that may be a wrong read, but that’s how you come across in your writing. Really, I’m on your side!
(I’d call you a curmudgeonly asshole, but that would be unkind, though accurate.)
@scrib: “Edit: I meant to say “arrogant, know-nothing, loudmouthed, pretentious windbag of a cunt”
Guys who use “cunt” as an insult don’t like women very much, actually. It’s a tell.
But, to repeat, I’m on your side. And therefore a bit concerned about your long game results. Man, we’re all just trying to figure out this stuff together.
@ang aamer suggests that marrying a younger woman increases the odds that she will perceive you as the alpha. Whereas marrying a post-wall woman increases the chance that she will *not* have genuine desire or respect for you (ie, you are BB). It is actually pretty easy to translate this into contemporary relationship-speak: the emotional honesty of younger women is a benefit to a man who wants to really connect with a woman. (In RP-speak, it is better to lose a shit test now, than to lose a wife and family 10 years from now.) RP is actually very progressive,… Read more »
It’s an indictment of modern churchianity that what most believe is the Divine nature of men and women must be mutually exclusive from the complementarity of our evolved natures.
This is insightful. Those two things are not mutually exclusive. They are not even two things. They are the same thing.
I know. I waste my best material on IB.
http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/0907/say-it-again-demotivational-poster-1248030687.jpg
It is interesting that Deida’s survey shows that women identify “Presence” as the #1 quality that they are looking for in a man. When I starting on TRT, I was surprised by how immediately women responded to the boost in testosterone (long before I put on muscle). My voice got deeper, but most of “presence” is going to come down to subtle sub-communication that is hard to exactly define, except to say that it is masculine.
Aim high.
Not all 40 somethings are old and smelly. Lol.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-q_k3Pn1onS8/Vq3URqqlrlI/AAAAAAAAKWE/dbFRkf9zBEo/s1600/Stacey-Dash-2.jpg
And some 60 year olds manage..
Age drags most of us to some hellish places. But it doesn’t always have to be so.
60!?!
@ Marko ” All the OMGs are wrestling with the issue of the declining SMV of their wives. And, especially, what to do after the kids leave home. (Is there such a thing as male hypergamy? E.g. Donald Trump, and innumerable rich guys). OMGs report their wives work hard at looking good, and still do (as does my wife, though she isn’t 22 any more, or 44, or even 66!). But the wives are no longer hot young pussy, and never will be again. ” Myself, I don’t wrestle with a ( supposed ) declining SMV of my wife. She… Read more »
@ Lost Patrol
Genetics and work bro.
Oh, and Ernestine is 80….
http://atlantablackstar.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Ernestine-Shepherd-e1339431406886.jpg
!?!80!?! I really need to get it in gear.
I lose my shit over musclecars. It’s a weakness.
Fairly common among American men of a certain age. Especially Coke Bottle Charger, 440 Magnum Six-Pack.
@ Lost Patrol Lol…. ” I really need to get it in gear.” You preaching to the choir brother. Wifey is starting to get the shadows of a six pack. My belly is smooth like glass…lol. Normally I have always been a self starter, but I have become the poster child for Slackers of America since a slight shoulder injury. So I’m looking to get more motivated. This guy is doing it right – And along with his wife they make a good OMG couple. Time to get busy Lost Patrol!! Like Dad says- ” Ain’t nothing to it, but… Read more »
I might have missed it, Marko, but… why are you here? Why are you reading TRM? What was the life event that made you seek this place out? I don’t think Facebook just suggests it on your feed as “you may like…” Rollo started writing this blog because a good buddy topped himself over problems with women. I’d say that almost to a man most readers are here because their relationships with women (or a particular woman) weren’t what they wanted or seemed. Why are you here? Your “model” of marriage apparently works great for you. Despite many, many posts… Read more »
@blax great pix, found myself wishing those beauties were in the foreground though
the cars I mean lol
damn, it’s 420
@ Dr Zipper
Yup. I had to stop myself from posting 20 Charger pics.
I have addiction issues.
http://www.allworship.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/bigstock-Fork-1211956-640×428.jpg
Most important piece of fitness equipment of all time… everyone has one.
“Rollo started writing this blog because a good buddy topped himself over problems with women. I’d say that almost to a man most readers are here because their relationships with women (or a particular woman) weren’t what they wanted or seemed. Why are you here?” There is a crisis out there. And it is spelled MISANDRY. Which is weaved into societal norms, conventions and laws. And it is a crisis of epic proportions. It is a huge problem called Feminine Social Primacy. (Which is out to really, really, really preserve female supremacy. And some of us are not misogynistic nor… Read more »
@Markos Also the crux of the problem that some of us have with the purported 50/50 arrangements that were blown into smithereens by feminine social primacy (Heh, more remedial reading): https://therationalmale.com/2016/04/24/fempowerment/ For the greater part, any dubious ‘right’ women feel they were somehow denied in the past usually comes at the expense of men being liable for decisions they had nothing to do with. What I have a problem with is an expectation of lowering the standards of the game, thus fundamentally altering the game, to better accommodate the variable strengths and weaknesses of women – up to, and including,… Read more »
https://www.instagram.com/p/qYZaGANi3P
Spot the Alpha.
@Senty
Had time to watch a movie today . <My 4:00 am – 7:00 am time slot was free
So I watched gambler . Great movie good looks on the recommendation
Mersonia – cool. some times you need to force yourself into an All In position.
Looking back over the thread, Shannon Bream… we saw her at 22 and 40 something… and notwithstanding fetishism… not much of a comparison to most…
so here is the same thing from the guys side…
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OtaXuH2Uqa8/T2n1nPmya6I/AAAAAAAAOUU/fX477K6Gw3o/s1600/Steve%2BLyon%2B%25283%2529.jpg
Steven Lyon young…
https://www.instagram.com/p/BFImNfntiw6
Steven Lyon at 55…
Fuck you to the FI…
@Mineter “Why are you here?” Great question! I married as an Alpha, or at least a guy with a strong MPO. Over time and kids and several changes of career, got (allowed myself) to become somewhat betasized. Worked with co-dependency stuff, Gottman, etc., still couldn’t back focus. Then got Manuel Smith’s work on Assertiveness. Great stuff! Got much clearer focus, and more genuine desire rather than negotiated “desire” from wife. Assertiveness, and the ethical and psychological permission and justification for assertiveness is magic. Yet I still had quite a bit of SJW stuff in my head. Then, I ran into… Read more »
@Rollo, SJF
Totally agree with your “What’s Your Problem?” Post.
I see the same carnage. The causes of it need to be eliminated.
But, Deida Stage II works, if you work it. Fact. Experience of many. It is anti-FI, anti-oneitis, anti-hypergamy, pro-full Masculinity and Femininity. It is pro-game, because game is masculinity, and it works. Does not work for everyone,YRMV. Deida III and willing submission may work better for many.
Oneitis and female hypergamy and the FI will do guys in. We men who care need expose the situation so guys can see it and escape to masculinity.
@SJF, Rollo, re Fempowerment “Feminism and the consolidation of the Feminine Imperative have failed because Men were not evolved to acquiesce their dominant spirit. On the same evolutionary level women also evolved into requiring that conventionally masculine dominance. This is why feminism and egalitarianism will ultimately fail – nature simply will not cooperate with it’s own stagnation. As men, we can use this truth to our Red Pill aware advantage.” OK, I’m clear on this now, what your solution is. I’m just not buying it. We sure have a big problem with the crazy double-think of equalism (“except there is… Read more »
@ Marko You really want to settle for merely passing shit tests? Or do you want to use them to your advantage? By using them to your advantage, what I mean is having more Real Power (T.M.). You having real power and being free of mind with strength, courage, mastery and honor among men to exercise that power makes your wife better off. The shit tests she gives you are her begging you to be that man. To be your best imitation of your real self. Listen to your sub-conscious mind and use your excellent and delightful cognitive mind (otherwise… Read more »
“….nature simply will not cooperate with it’s own stagnation
Otherwise know as the Red Queen Hypothesis. This is what YaReally kept complaining about. Over and Over.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Queen_hypothesis
“Best I go back to lurk mode, “to take what I want, and leave the rest.”
Otherwise know as Stagnation + Settling = Buffering
Kate Beckinsale, 44.
http://www.hawtcelebs.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/kate-beckinsale-at-ed-sullivan-theatre-in-new-york-05-11-2016_1.jpg
Kate Beckinsale, 44. Apex Hypergamist.
What are you going to do about that?
@Blax – Ime, young chicks- 20 to 25 or so, are easier for an older gentleman to game. That’s been my experience since I’ve become ” old “. Most of them have never witnessed real Game, and it can easily overwhelm them. Never would have believed it until this afternoon, but holy shit. Now I do. Sitting in a Starbucks in a big NW city and a cute little dirty blonde is sitting at another table pecking away at her computer. She looks at me, I look at her. Catch her looking at me several times actually. I just crossed… Read more »
The Apex Fallacy seems to me to be a problem in the TRP community. The problem is that a goal to reach the Apex is just that. A goal. I see it all the time in medical patients wanting what ought to be, rather than what is. (Dr. Laura Schlessinger uses that mantra incessantly. And she is getting more red pill by the moment after 40 years of giving advice on the radio) A patient may have a certain condition. The goal is to eradicate it, but which I, meanwhile, have to temper their expectations on reaching that apex goal.… Read more »
Update For anyone that read my earlier post about my “beta in waiting” friend who I tried to red pill after the end of his 4 year let. I hadn’t heard from him in 2 weeks and was worried about him. Turns out I had good reason, last night I found out that he has been admitted to an urgent care mental health facility! This is what can happen when you take women seriously and develop oneitis from a beta mental point of origin, don’t let that be you. I’m hoping this will be the catalyst that opens him up… Read more »
@Jeremy – good work! (except for the not closing – but that’s just practice. Now you KNOW you can do it and that the girl wants it). A sophomore is more like 19ish btw, depending on when she started college – not 22. So you nearly had a teenager… Speaking of exercising btw, since switching mostly to a ketogenic/paleo diet (except when travelling) and starting to lift regularly in late Dec (less than a month). Already seeing results. Even my mom came to visit and she commented my shoulders were looking bigger since she saw me over Christmas (lol). And… Read more »
anon
Kate Beckinsale Beckinsale had an eight-year relationship with actor Michael Sheen from 1995 until 2003. They met when cast in a touring production of The Seagull in early 1995 and moved in together shortly afterwards.[192][193][194] In 1997, they appeared in a radio production of Romeo and Juliet.[55] Their daughter, Lily, was born in London in 1999. The actress has said she was “embarrassed” that Sheen never proposed,[42][195] but felt as though she were married.[196] Their relationship ended in early 2003, after the filming of Underworld.[197] Beckinsale and Sheen remain close friends. She remarked in 2016: “He’s really dear, close family.… Read more »
That’s about as chaste as Hollywood gets.
The rub is Anon that Len dumped 42yo Kate for a 25 yo….
Funny mention the Sisterhood and the RP women get in a skiffle…
I’m not RP. Nor am I in a skiffle. Or perhaps I am, I don’t really know what a skiffle is. Perhaps you meant a scuffle? At any rate, if that was the “rub” it wasn’t mentioned in your post so how could I have deduced it?
Kate Beckinsale is apex. Steve Lyon is apex. These are apex people who serve as inspiration but they aren’t necessarily examples of what the average person is capable of.
“These are apex people who serve as inspiration but they aren’t necessarily examples of what the average person is capable of.” Truth be told, one of the reasons I’ve been so enthusiastic about red pill is because if you look at any celeb pics of Kate and Michael Sheen,…. well that’s about the SMV-at-a-glance between my wife and I. And I could show you some pics in which Mrs. SJF nearly rivals Kate @ 44 years old. And Mrs. SJF has lots of value after. The reason I make this statement is not to brag, just to point out why… Read more »
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-HDRHw5HPi2Y/ULGleDTWkwI/AAAAAAAAANg/wFoKTUBWUgU/s400/1.gif
The better you are, the harder it gets, but if you stop trying you slide right back down to near the bottom again.
On the flip side, the first 90% is relatively easy for most people and the only reason for not getting there is failing to even try.
A parable: Guy attends a church for quite a while. People are very friendly. Minister gives great talks, full of good information about living the good life. Guy joins a small sharing group. People are open, and he learns helpful actionable information. He applies insights and practices in his life, and lots of good things happen. Then he is asked if he has been born again and believes that Jesus is his personal Savior. The guy says “No, I don’t buy that. There are over 30,000 verses in the Bible, and less than thirty can plausibly be interpreted that way.… Read more »
http://www1.pictures.zimbio.com/fp/CJ+Franco+shows+off+sexy+looks+Sunset+Photo+KuAXEMD9rv7l.jpg
24YO CJ Franco sees your 44YP Apex and raises.
This is (IMO) an example of the best type of workout for a female body. I’m not into weights/squats. Heavy squats will give a girl a Kardashian figure. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-5WsFKlKDk She has a number of workouts I recommend for women (if any of them are reading). Interesting on a prediction level too. Last month she and her LTR just sold everything, quit their jobs and he is essentially following her around videotaping and photographing her as a source of income. Well…they also have a vegan channel on youtube. I have a future image. Him talking to friend: Friend: “So bro, you… Read more »
I think Kate is far better looking than Franco. But, yes, Franco is wearing a swimsuit in that photo.
http://i4.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article6860787.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/Len-Wiseman-parties-at-The-Nice-Guy-with-a-mystery-girl-after-break-up-rumors-with-wife-Kate-Beckinsale.jpg
Apex Wiseman… he filed for divorce.
Okay. What is your point, Sentient? Twenty year olds look differently than 40 year olds?
Yes, they do. Lyons too looks much different at 55 than when he did the film Campus Man.
People shouldn’t try to be 20 when they are 44.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BN3FCuoAgrO
The point? Apex gonna Apex when he wants to. And nothing can stop it.
Okay. Cool.
The Ward Clever types raised the “free love” hippie generation.
The guy continues to attend the church off and on, but he doesn’t become a member. And it is clear that the church doesn’t want him as a member, unless he changes his beliefs to agree with theirs. Fair enough. The thing is, though, did anyone here say “you’re doing it wrong, you shouldn’t do what you are doing, you should change what you are doing?”. Mostly it was “well, what you’re saying isn’t what I have seen in my life and around me, and doesn’t work for me” or “that may work for you, but I don’t think it… Read more »
“Heavy squats will give a girl a Kardashian figure.”
No. A Kardasian figure requires a Kardasian frame which requires Kardashian ancestry. Nor is squatting the control on either glute development or fat deposition. It is merely a stimulus.
“Nice deep squats,” she said, while stopping halfway.
The video is nearly 15 minutes long. I stopped watching at 2:25 because she had already finished her glute set, but stopping there would have put nearly the entire personal trainer industry out of business.
Truth be told, one of the reasons I’ve been so enthusiastic about red pill is because if you look at any celeb pics of Kate and Michael Sheen,…. well that’s about the SMV-at-a-glance between my wife and I. Which really underscores the central importance of game, I think. Wiseman nicked Kate off Sheen pretty effectively, even after a long number of years and a kid, and even though all three were working on the same film together, and Wiseman was still married …. to someone else. Pretty effective “turnover” there, really. Perhaps with tighter game it wouldn’t have played out… Read more »
Anon – why do you think you dragged poor Kate into this?
” . . . while stopping halfway.”
Which, by the way, puts maximal possible shear loading on your knees when you should be looking to minimize.
” . . . or perhaps Wiseman . . .”
. . . who famously never proposed to her, didn’t intend to keep her around forever in the first place and was quite ready to move to the younger Rachel McAdams.
That poor bastard Wiseman had to divorce her to move on.
Anon – ” as a source of income. ”
Did you miss the PIMP game posts? I wouldn’t be too hasty here…
Fucked up the names in that. Need more coffee. It’s the idea that counts; yeah, that’s the ticket.
KFG. 46 YO Sarah Silverman???
I can’t post it.
“Anon – why do you think you dragged poor Kate into this?”
Because she is my favorite actress and I think she is stunning (and not a weight lifter), so I thought she would be a good addition to the other over forty photos.
@Sentient:
An ugly fact that I’d need a much thicker carpet ( and perhaps sturdier boots) to hide, but that is the dynamic now, not then.
And he hasn’t married Silverman either.
@ TuffLuv, RE: January 26, 2017 at 11:52 am, “I don’t want to leave, but I’m telling you now I CAN.. do you SEE?” First of all, I am not claiming any expertise in dealing with this situation. However, I had a slightly different solution to what you experienced. Is it possible that your wife was not firing a warning shot, but rather was shooting to kill. By this I mean, was she testing her SMV to be certain that she could take her goods to market. Continuing the analogy, was she using you for target practice to make sure… Read more »
There’s a certain amount of personal preference going on here – and really it is a bit unrealistic to compare 44 year old Kate with a 24 year old CJ…Kate is like in the top 0.0001% of 44 year olds..CJ is super hot but she’s still probably in the top 1-2% (or whatever) of 24 year olds. Even age aside, it’s not really like and like. I mean, right now CJ is hotter than Kate but there are plenty of hot 24 year olds who are less attractive than Kate. And 24 year old Kate – way hotter than 24… Read more »
I like Prager, but he is particularly odious when it comes to relationships. He obviously didn’t learn from his first divorce.
@Nova Yes, tight Game indeed. That’s why I loved YaReally and implicitly agreed with everything he said. *smirk* But on a serious note, I tore down my mindset and rebuilt it with game over the last three and a half years. With her being a complement but not the focus of me living my life. During the same time my son and daughter had some turbulent (but good) times between their 18 y.o. to 25 year old time frames. I almost nosedived at the start of that. I’m solid now but never take anything for granted. She’s hitting a looks… Read more »
I like Prager, but he is particularly odious when it comes to relationships. He obviously didn’t learn from his first divorce. Maybe learned from his second divorce. Two time loser becomes an expert? Sure, why not? Funniest thing to me about the video and another one I saw on the same theme: Pudge-boys Prager / Geraghty to young men “Ward Cleaver…Ward….Cleaver!” Anyone under 40: Who? Who are you two old dudes talking about? The fact that those two pudgeboys had to reach back 50+ years to find a TV dad to reference ought to tell them something, if they weren’t… Read more »
@ Culum
Kate ( who I’ve always found to be gorgeous ) is not in the top 000.1% of 44 year olds. She’s a celeb, and because of that she gains a certain level of media attention. Most 44 year old women IRL are practically invisible iin a more youth centric market.
Guys that bag heavily on chicks iin their 40’s…. I don’t know where they are looking. Just like in any other age demographic, there are hot and not. A 44: year old woman is never a 24 year old woman.
Guys that bag heavily on chicks iin their 40’s…. I don’t know where they are looking. Just like in any other age demographic, there are hot and not. Maybe has to do with the age of the guy in question, I think. When I was 30 I knew there were attractive 45 yo women, but I think it was probably only the top 2-5% of 45 yo that I thought were like that. At 50, it’s a higher % of 45 yo, and probably I see a smaller % of 60 yo attractive. I’d say there are *more* attractive 24… Read more »
@ Novaseeker
I think that is undoubtedly the case.
I can stroll through the city and see 100 beautiful women whereas a guy half my age right beside me will see 25. Maybe. At my age no one is invisible. Old eyes man.
@Blax
I’ve always assumed that men try to knock women down in their own minds past a certain age. It makes the social convention of shitting on old people easier to leverage for dread. Don’t you think?
kfg “Heavy squats will give a girl a Kardashian figure.” No. A Kardasian figure requires a Kardasian frame which requires Kardashian ancestry. Nor is squatting the control on either glute development or fat deposition. It is merely a stimulus. I’m only going by my anecdotal experience. I have known many many gazelles who attempted to “get in shape” doing heavy squats, and ended up looking like a pear. Typically my anecdotal experience is proven right so often my paradigm shifts accordingly. That doesn’t mean it’s ipso facto right (I admit). “Nice deep squats,” she said, while stopping halfway. The video… Read more »
“I have known many many gazelles who attempted to “get in shape” doing heavy squats, and ended up looking like a pear.” While at this very moment tens of thousands of men are complaining that they’ve been lifting for years and haven’t been able to change their shape at all. This may not be the shape you’re looking for, but it isn’t Kardashian or pear: http://cdn.simplyshredded.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/walt3.jpg Correct use of this weight is the control: https://therationalmale.com/2017/01/25/the-reconstruction-iii/comment-page-4/#comment-187829 “Does that mean she’s doing it right?” Other than the arm movements not really being necessary and the mistake of not going past parallel, yes.… Read more »
https://twitter.com/TheFamilyAlpha/status/825883536532111360
Holy Shit. Wow! That is some beautiful artistry for The Family Alpha logo!
Great job.
Makes me feel like (and I interpret the left right shading as a covert theme that) there is a balance between Doing and Being in The Now (which is more difficult for men and often overlooked in Western Culture). Just doing shit, and Then being able to transcend simple guy stuff and elevate masculine desires and abilities into being able to be fearless enough to “exist in the Now” is a big masculine virtue.
Heh, thanks. It was a fun project.
@constrainedlocus
Thanks for this list.
Putting it in order like that shows what bullshit it is.
On the one hand, yes we must be responsible and accountable.
On the other, all left over 9 are ridiculous. As if settling down, getting a mortgage and working a full time job every day makes us an adult and guarantees us love.
Ha.
“All the OMGs are wrestling with the issue of the declining SMV of their wives. And, especially, what to do after the kids leave home.”
Of all the reasons OMG’s are here, the above doesn’t move the needle.
“You’re all trapped in your own deceptions and thinking yourselves wise, you became fools.”
Meat-fisted pretension. Disagreement isn’t dismissal.
@ Kfg “When You Wish Upon a Star” As a father subjected to repetitive replays of Disney Films, on VHS no less, when my kids were little, I would makeup song parodies to keep from going brain dead. I wrote one for Cinderella’s, “A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes”. No matter how your heart is grieving If you keep on believing The dream that you wish will come true So, if you keep on believing until your heart stops beating You might think your wish has come true This could be an anthem for guys that cannot totally… Read more »
@ollieoxenfree1 Your notes about boot drives etc to me sounded like applying Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to Red Pill learning / experiencing / believing / unplugging. e.g., “One of the key tenets of CBT is that distorted thinking leads to distress and problematic behaviors, whereas thinking realistically with less negativity allows individuals to respond to challenging life circumstances in an effective way.” “According to CBT, our pattern of thinking is like wearing a pair of glasses that makes us see the world in a specific way. CBT creates an awareness of how these thought patterns create our reality and determine how… Read more »
“Anybody? Thoughts?”
Read Martin Seligman’s Learned Optimism in the early 90’s. He studied hopelessness, why some succeed and some fail under equal stress. Haven’t read it with RP eye shades, tho.
Bottom line: The more personal, permanent and pervasive the negative thoughts, the poorer the coping, outcome, recovery. Flip side approaches narcissism, a better place to be if I had to choose.