Unconscious Contempt

Today’s essay was inspired by the lead image you see here and the subsequent exchange I had on Twitter about it. What you see here is a rather nebbish looking husband, I presume post-surgery, recovering from his vasectomy in bed. He is surrounded by cutesy post-it note jokes his wife left him (kind of like the notes your mom might put in your school lunch when you were a child) on a plethora of sugary snacks from the pantry.

The number of kids we’ll be having in the future – Zero

Forgive me if I Snicker

Sorry your dong got dinged

Good-bye to your swimmers

Mini Nonuts

Your berries got crunched

These are just a few of the ‘jokes’ his wife spent an awful lot of time creating.

Beta men and their wives joking about their vasectomies has become the meme du jour on all the usual social media sites where women congregate to appease their egos, gloss their girlfriends’ and commiserate about their fates of being wives and mothers. Before I dig in here I think I need to point out the utility that social media has evolved to serve in most women’s lives now. There was a time when a woman’s indignation needs could be met by daytime television, talkshows and romance novels when living vicariously through their girlfriends’ lives wasn’t sufficient. Today, women’s innate need for indignation is provided on-tap courtesy of the internet, social media and cutesy-but-insulting images of a husband are almost passé. I know, I’ve discussed this topic on a few podcasts, but it’s becoming increasingly more important for a man to understand what social media is providing to women’s nature and how their relationships are indirectly influenced by the exchanges their wives and girlfriends are having online.

I’ve seen a few of these “I got a vasectomy and my wife thinks it’s funny” social media posts before this one. Creating little post-it note jokes to apply to the snacks in the pantry might seem cute, but why is this even a thing? Why is it women/wives think it’s cute to publicly ridicule their partner about the impotence he elected to have? Amongst the Facebook and Instagram shots of her life, amongst the motivational quote memes, and among the complaints about kids, marriage and domestic life a moment of ridiculing their husband seems par for the course. And it’s all acceptable so long as the context is one of being ‘all in fun’.

Marriage today is a dicey proposition for men. I talk and write a lot about the overwhelmingly high risks of life and livelihood men should consider when it comes to how we do legal marriage in this era. MGTOW or not most men understand that marriage is basically for women now – at least with respect to the legal protections and the win-win incentives that are advertised for women. If all a woman ever did was read about marriage from social media and popular culture one would have to wonder why she would ever want to sign up for a lifetime of dealing with a husband, or the caricatures of average men, at all. The contempt for men, even in the most good natured, humorous, ways is palpable on most social media. It’s entirely acceptable, even expected, to deprecate the foibles of men in marriage. We literally can’t do anything right in a ‘female correct’ online world.

And like the “child-in-a-man’s-body” that women complain about, most of these average husbands are okay with being the butt of the joke. In fact, most are enthusiastic about their self-deprecation because they’ve been conditioned to think that doing so endears them to the women who married them and proves they’re “secure in their masculinity”.

Can’t you take a joke?

The first thing any woman, and any Beta male, will say is, “C’mon Rollo, it’s all in fun. Imagine being so humorless as not to get this? Who hurt you?” I think there’s an underlying acknowledgement of the passive aggressiveness that inspires this ‘humor’. When a comedian like Dave Chappell throws caution to the wind and does a 90 minute comedy routine that is funny as hell, but attacks the unassailable ‘correctness’ of our present social narrative we laugh along knowing the latent message of the humor. So, what is the latent message of making a man’s (elective) impotency a joke?

Imagine what the outrage would be on social media were you to make ‘cute’ jokes in the same way about your wife’s uterine ablation or tubal ligation. At the very least women wouldn’t think it was funny. No one tells women, “Lighten up. What, are you so insecure in your femininity that you can’t take a joke?” When a woman is rendered infertile it doesn’t occur to anyone to make light of it, but for a man to be neutered – and at the mutual agreement with his wife – we find the hit to his masculinity hilarious. Why is this?

I realize I’m focusing on one incident here in this image posted on r/funny, but this is an example of a larger dynamic. It’s socially acceptable to ridicule the impotency of Beta men. As I detailed in Selective Breeding, women will openly attack men’s genitals as a reflexive response to the possibility that a lesser man might try to fool her Hypergamous filters. A guy getting kicked in the nuts by a woman is always funny.

If women’s existential fear is being tricked into reproducing with a Beta male, then forcing herself to settle on a suboptimal man must inspire an inner conflict in her. There are lots of controversial self-help books published by women on both sides of this conflict. Some argue for women to accept a Beta guy and just make the best of it, others (especially religious books) argue that a woman should never compromise herself and wait for the best man (the ‘soulmate’ husband God has preordained for her) to present himself to her.

In Selective Breeding I made the argument that women’s existential fear is the possibility of having her Hypergamous filter (feminine intuition) fooled by a Beta male and becoming saddled with his shitty genetics for the rest of her life. This is a primal, evolved, fear for women that manifest itself, often unconsciously, in many of women’s behaviors that we either take for granted or we have social conventions that accommodate them. Decidedly gynocentric societies will legally mandate against this existential fear.

But what about women who are already married or pair-bonded with men that their evolved subconscious knows is a suboptimal choice for her? What about women who are trapped in a marriage with a guy that her hindbrain confirms is not the ‘best she can do’? How does that primal fear of being saddled with a faithful Beta manifest itself? 

He that has eyes to see and ears to hear may convince himself that no mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips; betrayal oozes out of him at every pore.

Sigmund Freud

Unconscious Contempt

I would argue that women today have never been more comfortable in expressing their contempt of the men they married. My recent essays on Polyamory and the deconstruction of men’s Paternity imperatives have been an exploration of how a feminine-primary social order is reimagining itself with respect to how men and women will come together and form families in the future. People will claim that women’s lack of respect for the masculine is the result of generations of men not living up to some old-school ideal. That might be so, but women have no respect for the masculine, the male experience, simply because they have no need to. 

Why do women feel comfortable – to the point of taking it for granted – in expressing contempt for their husbands? We can argue the basis of where this passive-aggressiveness comes from, but why is it okay to veil this contempt in humor?

Before I get run up the flagpole for being a humorless boor let me reiterate that I’m not saying men ought to read more into things like this. My point is the bigger picture here; why do we find this funny at all? I believe it’s a form of anxiety release for women who’ve committed to a lifetime of parental investment with a man that her hindbrain knows is less than what she believes is best for her.

These images were pulled from an Instagram account called Motherhood Through Letterboards. What’s interesting about this is the contempt for fathers and husbands that bleeds through what we should probably have a sense of humor about. You can have a look at some of these to get the context, but the latent purpose of this exercise is a release of the anxiety created by women’s pairing and reproducing with men that their hindbrains cannot accept as Alpha.

Again, we talk a lot in the Manosphere about how social media contributes to the gross overinflation of women’s sense of self. It’s easy to see how women overestimate their sexual market value, and then conflate it with their personal value, but there’s more to this than just the woman on OKCupid who thinks she’s a 9 when she’s really a 6. There comes a time when that woman with the overblown sense of self must “settle” on a man who her hindbrain believes isn’t the best she could do. The metric by which she judges what is the best she can do is also subject to this ego-overinflation.

The main reason most women agonize over the question of whether she should “settle” for Mr. Good Enough is rooted in this Hypergamous conflict that usually comes at a time in her life where her SMV and her options with men are decaying. Today, the reason we see the age of first marriage being pushed later and later in life for women is due to women prolonging this indecision. She knows she can do better than the less-exciting Beta who seems like her best option in her Epiphany Phase because she’s had better in her Party Years. She also knows she can do better because social media and a constant steeping in the new Global Sexual Marketplace has convinced her she’s actually a 9, not a 6, and anything less than perfect is a waste of her potential. All of this plays on women’s primal, Existential Fear of pairing with a suboptimal mate choice – for life.

But now she’s committed. She married the only guy who would date her in that phase of her life given her circumstances. She married the Beta in Waiting, who’s overjoyed that he’s finally found his Quality Woman who appreciates his type. He’s thanking God for bringing him a woman who tells him “I’m done with the Jerks” and wants to do the ‘right’ thing now – while her hindbrain is contending with her existential fear becoming reality due to her own necessity. Now add 1-2 children into this mix (his or not) and you get this passive-aggressive manifestation of her existential angst.

Fortunately for her there’s an unending number of women experiencing exactly the same unconscious contempt for the men they married online in dozens of popular social media groups. The desire to “punch him in the face” is always tempered with “love”, humor and platitudes about relationships always being “hard work”.

End Note: Vasectomies

I feel it’s incumbent upon me to address what will be the predictable binary responses of literalist critics here:

• No, I’m not saying don’t get a vasectomy.

• No, I’m also not saying that if you did get a vasectomy you’re a pathetic loser Beta.

I will however point out that when I see stories about how a Beta husband did come to the decision to get a vasectomy there are always a lot of subconscious reasonings that go along with it. For all the notions of egalitarian marriages and self-praise for being rationally evolved above the hindbrain interpretations, on some level of consciousness a man electing to sterilize himself is a confirmation of the value he puts in his masculinity. This is why women think it’s funny to ridicule your impotency. Her hindbrain has 100% confirmation that you know your reproductive viability has no value.

A man’s reasons for getting a vasectomy may be valid and in some ways empowering for him. I imagine there’s at least some confidence to be derived from knowing you wont be held responsible for any “accidental” pregnancies. I get why men would opt for it, but the way a woman’s feral brain interprets a man sterilizing himself is what I’m getting at here. You may think, “Well, I don’t give a damn what women think about it.” Fine. Totally valid, but I’m outlining a woman’s instinctual response to a man permanently preventing his own reproduction. There is a subcommunication underneath this decision that denotes emasculation, and this is what women resent.

In some ways I see wives celebrating their husband’s vasectomy for reasons that have nothing to do with improving their sex lives. In the original Twitter thread I had men tell me that they got a vasectomy at the suggestion of their wives, believing it would lead to greater sexual frequency (or any sex in a sexless marriage) only to admit that it never improved anything for them. So, why the goading to get a vasectomy? The dots I keep connecting are a subconscious desire on the part of women to geld a husband to ensure he never reproduces with other women. It’s almost like a service she’s doing for the Sisterhood. She’s making sure that her mistake never becomes any other woman’s mistake.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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disgruntledearthling
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disgruntledearthling
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Gelding and neutered are terms describing castration. Which is not the same as a vasectomy.
In my case, at 60yo with 2 adult kids, a vasectomy makes sure no one gets a claim on me during my soon-to-be retirement. I want to keep fucking raw without that risk.

But yeah, it looks like in today’s world, these beta men look pretty lame for taking that shit from their ‘wives’

Nikolai Vladivostok
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I think the purpose of the gelding is not for the sisterhood, but to prevent his resources being shared with future partners. Those resources are the main thing offered by the beta, after all

Tykebomb
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Tykebomb
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Looking at that gelded fool covered in snarky snacks makes my chest hurt.

Cool Shoes
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Nikolai Vladivostok
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@Cool Shoes, link is not working.

kooshareem
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kooshareem
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Well, I was cut and a hell of a lot of other demeaning shit to chase that elusive ass, which was promised to me by the fairy tale. What a waste of efforts. Also, Rollo, young men, no matter their value, should NEVER engage in self-deprecation. It is a fucking cancer that will ruin you.

Sharkly
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As a man, I also lose a huge amount of respect for any fool who willingly neuters himself regardless of the reason. And nothing you can argue will get that respect back for you. I just find neutering yourself to be an abominable disfigurement of your masculinity and personhood. People are either male of female. A guy at my work complained of his impotency, And now his coworkers all call him “limp-dick” and some told me they actually don’t want to work with him because of it. I’m not making that up. Sorry if that reality bothers some of you.… Read more »

KirthWGersen
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Two kids, 45. Had a great 20 year marriage and a fantastic divorce (in a Roman-law jurisdiction, so no dividing up property, 50-50 shared custody and no alimony). First thing I did after we divorced was get a vasectomy. All the women I knew, friends, family, neighbours, were very helpful and sympathetic. The ex-wife even popped round a couple of weeks after to prove everything still worked as before. That was kind of her… I have found two responses from women: The independent types who don’t want to get accidentally pregnant. They punch the air or high-five me when they… Read more »

Chris Clayton
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Chris Clayton
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After reading this I keep thinking if men would be more alpha a lot could be corrected. Men today never saw that and have to build from the ground up.(myself) Rule zero is gonna tackle that question 11-16-19. I may be wrong but if men learn what alpha is then you give women what they want and men get what they want and maybe “some” of this dunking on men would stop. My question is who is gonna be the man to point the way? Rollo? Tate? Rich? Someone better before Jordan Peterson or George Bruno tries….God forbid.

Poptarts
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Poptarts
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That guy looks so happy. What are you going to do if these people look like they are literally happy with the situation? Explain to them why they shouldn’t be? Same in the feminized corporate world that I see everyday. These idiots ruin everything for​ every man with any kind of integrity and still has a sense of his own worth and pride. His wife is right to mock him, he confirms that with his smile.

Poptarts
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Damn I wish Heartiste was still around. That pic is another pajama boy drinking hot coco classic.

theasdgamer
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Kirth, at least you have a couple of kids…but what are the odds that one or both won’t give you grandkids and you end up winning a Darwin Award? I know of couples with two kids, both of whom don’t ever want kids of their own.

My wife has five siblings, but only three had kids of their own.

The Overpopulation Blue Pill is leading people towards extinction of their genes. Young men who haven’t had kids yet may take the wrong message from your story.

Gern Blanderson
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First of all, women have been able to geld their men/partners secretly by taking the pill, for decades now. Other women choose tubal ligation. I would argue that tubal ligation would be worse for a marriage because the wife is more free to have affairs with the alphas. Regardless, the vasectomy is the best option for men who have decided they have had enough kids. I did it because I have enough kids. I told my wife I’m doing it and instead the joke became that it was the fast doctor appointment she ever saw me make in my life!… Read more »

David Roberts
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As always, love the insight, Rollo.

constrainedlocus
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It’s easy to see how women overestimate their sexual market value, and then conflate it with their personal value, but there’s more to this than just the woman on OKCupid who thinks she’s a 9 when she’s really a 6.

I think the new expression is “49er” – females (married or single) who have an approximate SMV of 4, when social media has them convinced that they are 9s.

Marc Richards
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Hi Rollo. Your last paragraph nailed my experience on the head (no pun). As my marriage was dying, my ex kept pressuring me to get a vasectomy. I had gone to the Office to have it done before but the thought of it literally made me sick…. But under the pretense of improving our relationship and such, I finally drugged myself up enough to do it. Not only did it not improve our sex life, I was given the boot a few months later. I have ruminated on the futility of the whole deal, and it very much seemed like… Read more »

Wildside
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Wildside
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I liked this very much, Rollo. It puts a new spin on ‘Do you keep your balls in your wife’s purse?’. One of the reasons I don’t go on Social Media, besides it just being white noise (poison for the girls and boys), is that it would trigger me too much when I see memes like this. The last image of the young couple. That just shows complete stupidity on his behalf. He obviously thinks they will be travelling the world together, forever like some kind of Disney love story, not wanting kids. See how he feels in 5 years… Read more »

Rudd
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Interesting thoughts about vasectomy. Im in my 40s, divorced, red pill mature, no kids and absolutely no inclination to have kids. Im also seeing four women, normally use protection, but not always. Im thinking of having a vasectormy, but purely from any potential risk of getting one of them pregnant.

I imagine that would be a ‘legitimate’ reason to have one, simply being careful and firmly putting myself as my mental point of origin. Thoughts ?

Bigjohn33
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My wife occasionally broaches the idea of a vasectomy. It is just a shit test. I usually tell her straight up “No, if this doesn’t work out I want to be able to have a family with someone else.” It is the truth too. We have 4 kids (all under 6) and plan on having more. I dont take it personally when she brings it up, or any other shit test for that matter. Its easy for her to get overwhelmed by the little ones and she just needs some reinforcement she has a strong masculine man to lead her.… Read more »

Major Styles
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Social media has brought out all the ugliest sides of the woman’s personality. And a byproduct is that it’s also brought out th epredatory nature of beta males and their incessant ass-kissing.

Fuck ’em all and feed ’em fish.

having a bad day
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having a bad day
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@Rollo overall, great OP, i’ve seen all of this sh*t play out in my own social circle, but i think you are imputing some ‘dog’ into this ‘cat’ analysis… So, why the goading to get a vasectomy? just another sh*t test… which he fails by getting the snip…as long as he has SOME fertility, she (her hindbrain) has at least some doubt… once he gets the snip, it’s all over… = no doubt… The dots I keep connecting are a subconscious desire on the part of women to geld a husband to ensure he never reproduces with other women. girls… Read more »

EhIntellect
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RP is amoral, my ass.

Rollo might as well wear a St. Gerard scapular now and picket Planned Parenthood dragging an oversized 2×4 cross muttering the Rosary. Bearded and wildeyed too.

Of course, obtain a municipal permit first. Render unto Ceasar what’s his, yo!

All together now….la-la-la…Come follow me, and I will lead you home.

See y’all at Mass, fellow heathens. Bwahahaha.

I love you guys to death. Keep it up!

Sentient
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“I imagine that would be a ‘legitimate’ reason to have one, simply being careful and firmly putting myself as my mental point of origin. Thoughts ?”

No way. No how. Vasectomy is diminishing your options. Life is long.

redlight
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“No way. No how. Vasectomy is diminishing your options. Life is long”

Exactly! If you live an active lifestyle why wouldn’t you want the happy news of 18+ years of child support.

Blaximus
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Never had any female broach the subject of vasectomy. Never considered such a thing, nor will I ever. The knowledge that I can knock up any fertile woman as long as I draw breath is a part of natural manhood.

Women’s talk and opinions regarding manhood matter not. Any contempt is just cause for immediate dismissal.

Cool, isn’t it?

Stefan
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Stefan
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Celebrating a vasectomy is a sign of mental illness !!!

Blaximus
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Newflash(…again) ejaculation inside vaginas is the number one cause of pregnancy.

It’s true.

If you do not want kids because the thought of providing for your offspring is mortifying, keep your fucking sperm to yourself.

If I was stupid enough to blast inside every chick I’d had sex with, I’d have a hundred kids or more. I have 2. I knew when they were conceived even.

Read up on biology and act accordingly. It’s not difficult. Otherwise prepare to take care of your child. Vasectomy is like burning your car because you’re convinced you’ll have an accident and become paralyzed.

Overreaction.

IAS
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I’m pretty certain I don’t want kids, so I’ve been considering getting a vasectomy. Too bad that easily reversible options (like vasalgel), which are certainly within our technological reach, are possibly being delayed by the FI because it would be an inconvenience for the FI to allow men greater control over reproduction. I have also wondered many times about so many accidental pregnancies, and whether the (presumably scientific) reports that women can get pregnant when the man doesn’t ejaculate inside them (due to pre-ejaculate having some low odds of impregnating) are actually tiny odds but exaggerated to allow an explanation… Read more »

Blaximus
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IAS

My first child was conceived while my wife was on ” the pill “. We attempted to plan pregnancy, but ejaculate sometimes won’t be denied.😁

Condom.

Raw dogging might have a penalty. Fact.

He aware and understand that consequence may pay a lengthy visit.

I never quite grasp how men that absolutely don’t want kids insist on putting bare dick inside women.

I agree with sentient that life is long. Wrap it up until your attitude changes…..or doesn’t.

redlight
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redlight
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As Blax says “Wrap it up is a part of natural manhood”

John O.
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John O.
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I don’t fully understand those men who decide to have a vasectomy in order to protect themselves from being “sperm-jacked” by women and to enjoy unprotected sex as a result – who, in his right mind, would risk his sexual health and his life by having unprotected sex with women these days?

After sex, rinse the condom.

John O.
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No true alpha has a vasectomy.

The knowledge that a male sexual partner can impregnate the female he’s currently mating with, should he wish to do so, is part of the erotic attraction for that female. Once he’s lost that ability, his maleness, his masculinity, his attractiveness, is diminished in her eyes. Hence, those derisive, contemptuous social media posts.

Wahoo
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Part of her existential fear may stem from her survival instinct in opposition to the sharing of resources with children fathered to other mates. She will share if she’s worth having around. The vasectomy eliminates the chance of future claims, she will still question the past and expect other children to show up to claim alpha lineage.

redlight
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@John0

“The knowledge that a male sexual partner can impregnate the female he’s currently mating with, should he wish to do so, is part of the erotic attraction for that female”

He simply denies having one unless she becomes pregnant

Boris
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Other than health problems, I have no idea why someone would do a vasectomy… No idea at all.

redlight
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redlight
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@boris

I agree, people who are black pill have no reason to get a vasectomy

Anonymous Reader
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First pic (“punch in the face”) and last pic (“travel with dogs”) are conspicuous for an obvious reason: the woman looks older than the man. In fact, the first pic looks like an aunt pissed at her nephew…or “mom” and “sonny”, even.

Men should avoid marrying older women for a whole lot of reasons, beginning with “milk” vs. “wine”.

Anonymous Reader
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Social media is to women’s solipsism and ingroup preference as online porn is to men’s sexual needs. Except that men generally don’t “you GO dude!” other men when sharing porny URL”s.

Social media is more like “meth for the ego”, in some respects.

Playdontpay
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Vasectomy? Wtf? You guys do know that a weekly testosterone injection is as effective a method of BC as the female pill (98%+) ? And its easily reversed without an operation (stop injecting for 6+ months) . Also plenty of alpha side effects of having optimal T levels. Oh you didn’t? Well that’s on you dumbass go get the snip. I’ve never used protection with my 11 years younger gf of 2 years or with my previous 18 year younger main plate of 3 years and guess what No Kids! Who’d a thunk it? The solution is already there no… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
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I imagine that would be a ‘legitimate’ reason to have one, simply being careful and firmly putting myself as my mental point of origin. Thoughts ?

Agree with Sentient that you are reducing your options. Based on relatives and men in my social circle, there will always be side effects – physical and mental side effects.

By the way, I have seen these billboards in multiple states right by the freeway. I imagine they are making money, somehow.
comment image

Anonymous Reader
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Alternate captions for the pic at the head of the essay:

“Mommy is happy now, see all my yummy snacks?”

“I went to the doc for a vasectomy and all I got from her is cheap snacks!”

“I swapped my sperm for snacks. Good trade, ya think?”

Shearer
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Its the mans choice to have or not to have a vasectomy… its his life and no one else’s to decide or manipulate for their own benefit ! Im 47yrs old and I had a vasectomy after 1 child (age 4) as parenthood is very hardwork & challenging everyday… I learned very quickly it takes a village to raise a child ! & the financial/marriage strain that occurred….Everyones circumstances are different. For me having a vasectomy was the best investment I have ever made and cost £460… which is peanuts compared to an accidental pregnancy ! There is zero shame… Read more »

foxguy
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The last picture makes me shake my head, he has no idea what is coming in the future with that girl, straight up innocent. Getting snipped is failing the ultimate shit test to the girl, I have told my wife that if it doesn’t work out with her for whatever reason I will start another family with a younger/hotter woman and have more kids there in addition to the two I have with here and I fully mean it. If a girl sees you as high value she will want to get pregnant by you, especially a girl in her… Read more »

John O.
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John O.
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They only sneer at a vasectomy.

They cheer for Lorena Bobbitt.

Blaximus
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Blaximus
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Village? To raise a child?

redlight
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@foxy “I have told my wife that if it doesn’t work out with her for whatever reason I will start another family with a younger/hotter woman and have more kids there in addition to the two I have with here and I fully mean it.” That’s what blue pill pro calls family feud dread “If a girl sees you as high value she will want to get pregnant by you, especially a girl in her early 20s.” One of Rollo’s Irony Rules “If a girl only has one child with you that is also a red flag as she most… Read more »

tweell
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I got a vasectomy after we had our fifth child, wife was 42. After she delivered our son, she was in no condition to get a tubal ligation, and birth control had failed us multiple times already. I didn’t want another high risk pregnancy, so got snipped. My wife never teased me about it or used it against me. She’s gone now (cancer sucks) but I still believe it was the right thing to do.

SJF
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I’m out at deer camp and I have a lame- assed comment.

Regarding the title, Rollo.

I see why you did there.

We know who demonstrates contempt, which is a 4-Horseman Gottman Relationship Killer…

Who is the unconscious one, the Male or the Female?

con·tempt
noun
the feeling that a person or a thing is beneath consideration, worthless, or deserving scorn

I know who I vote for in LTRs when she decided it is best.

walawala
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walawala
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Another one:: can’t get it up? You’re not a man. She’s dry as a bone? You’re not turning her on enough.

Sentient
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Sentient
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“Exactly! If you live an active lifestyle why wouldn’t you want the happy news of 18+ years of child support.”

Yes yes mgtows go cut your ball sack, let’s not risk knockimg up those dolls…

Sentient
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Wala “Another one:: can’t get it up? You’re not a man. She’s dry as a bone? You’re not turning her on enough.” Your dick is a very good barometer. If YOU can’t get it up, there is generally a very good reason. It might actually be medical, it might be she’s unattractive – it most probably means you are not up for the task at hand. For some reason. Figure out that reason… She’s dry? Well again it might actually be medical (hormonal) bit most likely is you aren’t turning her on. Hint – if she is getting wet for… Read more »

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[…] Wives making fun of their husband’s vasectomy – what does the humour reveal? […]

lol
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lol
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autism 101. I used to look up to you bro.

Dan
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Dan
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if you cant impregnate other woman, you cannot produce any real threat for your partner to leave her…

Gorgeous George
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Gorgeous George
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Two comments to this post: Less than 20% of males are Alphas, so not every woman can land an Alpha for a LTR, no matter how overblown her own sense of SMV is. It’s a numbers game; an Alpha won’t waste his time on anything less than 8s even when having multiple women. It means that 7s and below need to compromise. Regarding the last paragraph, if a woman believes she landed an Alpha for LTR, vasectomy is in her interest after producing children with him. It’s an insurance that his resources will remain in her control for her and… Read more »

Blaximus
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Blaximus
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” Less than 20% of males are Alphas, so not every woman can land an Alpha for a LTR, no matter how overblown her own sense of SMV is. It’s a numbers game; an Alpha won’t waste his time on anything less than 8s even when having multiple women. It means that 7s and below need to compromise. “

Source(s)?

rugby11
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rugby11
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From yesterdays rule zero
“women love ‘getting’ married, but hate ‘being’ married”

Softek
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Softek
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Another reminder to not hop on the Beta bandwagon. And that Alpha is a state of mind, not a demographic.

Finding yourself in a situation where your “wife” is making jokes like this…not good.

Finding yourself in a situation where you think your “wife” making jokes like this is okay….even worse.

Avoid. Like the plague. Time that would be spent tolerating this BS would be better spent asking yourself what masculinity means to you, and what it means to respect yourself as a man.

Pat Campbell (@PC1170)
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When a man submits to a vasectomy he has surrendered frame
Especially if it’s at the urging of the wife.

foxguy
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foxguy
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Not only have you surrounded frame to her, you have surrendered frame to all womankind permanently. It’s a hindbrain thing, you can come up with all the logical , spreadsheet it a million ways as to why it was right, but at animal level you will no longer be reproducing which is the biggest sin possible against nature. I’m starting to agree that Alpha is a first and foremost a mindset, it has nothing to do with what you look like although that for sure can enhance it. I saw a pretty good looking woman at the mall yesterday with… Read more »

redlight
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redlight
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“ No, I’m also not saying that if you did get a vasectomy you’re a pathetic loser Beta“

“When a man submits to a vasectomy he has surrendered frame”

get a vasectomy reworded as submits to a vasectomy

not a pathetic loser Beta reworded as surrendered frame

add more castration terms and bring to a boiling talk show

Whytdog
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Whytdog
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Knew a couple. The guy had a vas but wife was still on Bc. Guess what happened next?

O.B.I.T.
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O.B.I.T.
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It’s not so much the vasectomy/no vasectomy issue that strikes me here, it’s that men are willingly losing frame to social media. Losing frame not just to their woman but also to some vast unseen audience to which she is playing.

redlight
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redlight
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@obit

You are correct. However at this minute the guys are on youtube discussing the wrong concern, since they also sell shaming on social media.

Sentient
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Sentient
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“It’s a mindset, don’t push the stroller don’t be taking care of the kids, etc.”

After the first born the wife rgought it would be “so cool!” If we got one of those strap on baby things.

Yeah… No.

“But it’s so European!”

Yeah. No.

She really thiught it would be “neat” and “fun”…

Anonymous Reader
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Anonymous Reader
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Gorgeous George Less than 20% of males are Alphas, so not every woman can land an Alpha for a LTR, no matter how overblown her own sense of SMV is. Alpha is situational. “Alpha enough” even more so, despite the effects of social media. Regarding the last paragraph, if a woman believes she landed an Alpha for LTR, vasectomy is in her interest after producing children with him. It’s an insurance that his resources will remain in her control for her and her children’s benefit and not be shared in case he reproduced with other women. Lol. Girls break rules… Read more »

Blaximus
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Blaximus
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Interesting. After my first daughter was born prematurely, weighing a touch over a pound, I’d go to the premature ward daily and have the nurses/attendants take her out of the incubator so I could sit and hold her and talk to her. It was the only time she’d open her eyes. 3 months later when it was time for her to finally come home, I picked her up from the hospital and secured her in a little carseat basinet thing, brought her inside the house, and placed her in her crib. I changed her diapers and gave her the first… Read more »

SJF
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SJF
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Well you bring the drama, and pleasant drama alpha,Blaximus. Good Job. “I’ve known a bunch of men that I consider ” Alpha ” in every sense of the word, and most of them were fathers. In the sphere, we constantly try to paint ” Alpha ” as basically selfish ( with everyone including children ) over-sexed 6 ft+ tall square jawed handsome semi assholes that will only fuck, have adventures, and die ( probably with a hard on ), but I believe that notion is terribly misguided. Mindset. Yareally made the off color comment here years ago saying something to… Read more »

Fact
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Fact
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Degnerate alpha males with high notch count of partners get vasetcomy so they can’t get locked down by women who “forgot” to take birth control. Also there are happily married men who already had 2 kids and just dont want any more.

But agree that American culture is approaching peak beta.

Culum Struan
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Culum Struan
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As with most things, I think the attitude with which you approach it matters.

You can be alpha and take care of your kids, walk around wearing them in a sling on your chest, whatever – because YOU want to. That’s still alpha, since it’s from your MPOO.

What’s not alpha is to be pushed into it by your wife, “because it would look cool and European” or whatever.

But the action is the same…

Johann Liebert
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Johann Liebert
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Knowing Red Pill has nothing to do with being Alpha or Beta. A man can choose not to have sex, but a man who is parmanently ending his sexual potency is, without any doubt, a beta. And I feel sorry for the children born from beta seeds, these children can never actually grow up and detach themselves from parents. Beta creates beta, Alpha creates alpha. And betas don’t survive in the wild.

Johann Liebert
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Johann Liebert
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One of the reason Beta males can’t let go of their children is because they know that their children won’t go through the natural selection process and won’t survive. They are in constant fear that if their children are okay or not. Alphas don’t have to do that because their offspring will go through natural selection that is already hardwired in human psyche and is the best way to survive in the wild. Not everybody should breed, being alpha or beta is not a choice. The world is accomodating Alpha breeding (natural selection) and nature is taking its couse going… Read more »

IAS
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IAS
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@Blax:
regarding the prevalence of male offspring in your parents, and you getting only daughters…

It isn’t 50%, depending on how you conceive (and when, with respect to the actual ovulation date). We had some discussions about this here in the past. From memory, Y sperm (leading to male offspring) are sprinters and X sperms survive longer. So ejaculating close to ovulation favors by some degree Y sperm and so on, and the vaginal conditions in terms of acidity and such might favor X etc.

There is also some Sexy daughters” theories:
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/222878925_Sexy_sons_and_sexy_daughters_the_influence_of_parents'_facial_characteristics_on_offspring

IAS
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IAS
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@Blax: you recently wrote (in a different comment) a story about a girl holding onto you as you ejaculated inside her (without your consent). Do you mind rewriting?

John O.
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John O.
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Of course, we can all see what this will lead to….

https://feministphilosophers.wordpress.com/2008/02/14/a-modest-proposal-mandatory-vasectomies/

Wildside
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Wildside
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@Blax. It’s always enlightening to read your posts and for me, personally, humbling. Being a single, never married man and one of my friends being married with 2 little girls I respect the sacrifice he makes for his family. I have talked at length with him about his marriage and he is very pragmatic about it. Last year, at Christmas, he made a big revelation to me. He talked about how he thought about throwing himself on the train tracks. Not because he does not love his daughters and wife. That is what stopped him but because of the sacrifices… Read more »

John O.
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John O.
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@Redlight

“He simply denies having one unless she becomes pregnant.”

But then you get her drama – “How could you be so deceitful?”

Plus, her pregnancy reveals she’s having risky unprotected sex with other men (which no vasectomy can protect against).

Protect your penis – “Fuck, but cover”.

redlight
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redlight
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@john0

If she gets pregnant the drama of telling her it isn’t yours has been described as priceless.

If you are spinning plates you still need to be covered. If you go exclusive and both get tested, then yes it will suck to go get tested again. Life with cunts instead of dolls.

foxguy
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foxguy
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@Blax 10-4 , I’ve pushed my kids on strollers rarely but it was of my own decision as it was yours, I will spend a lot of time talking to my kids about mindset and showing it, building the right mental foundations, etc. I also spend a lot of time academically with both my kids, they are big readers and top notch academically and I have specific academic programs for them.I spend not insignificant hours on this stuff but it gives me a big chance to mold them and that is priceless for me. They are already competitors for top… Read more »

redlight
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redlight
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Below are some quotes from the NY Times opinion piece The End of Babies. Rollo claims the cause is “not capitalism”, however he provides no details about virtual vasectomy, where guys have zero or only one child over their lifetime. Quotes: Thanks to scholarships, and my mother’s tremendous sacrifices, I graduated from college without debt. Thus unencumbered, I spent most of my 20s working and studying overseas. Along the way, I got two master’s degrees, and built a rewarding, if not especially remunerative, career. In my late 20s, I learned about egg freezing. … At 34, I finally underwent the… Read more »

Peregrine
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Peregrine
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I second disgruntledearthling’s take. Got a vasectomy to improve my sex life. Worked, to unexpected levels and unforeseen ways. Wife didn’t celebrate it, really, more was ok with it; but I would definitely call the result rewarding it.

Mongo
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Mongo
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Pow! night in the ruts.

Gorgeous George
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Gorgeous George
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https://therationalmale.com/2019/11/15/unconscious-contempt/#comment-284582

@Anonimous

Oh, I’ll stick around for the daily dose of Red Pill vitamins. However, I made that comment based on the experience of a friend who I’ve known since college, that I would classify as a Blue Pill Alpha, basically a Chad, was nailing chicks left and right back in college days. Then he found the One.
Fast forward to present, he’s got good paying job climbing corporate ladder, just bought a bigger house and got a vasectomy after having kids. The wife does fuckall. You think he came up with the vasectomy idea by himself?

redlight
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redlight
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@gg

“You think he came up with the vasectomy idea by himself?”

Maybe after six months of sleep deprivation torture from baby colic

Weyman
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Weyman
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I do agree with Rollo regarding a woman’s view of a vasectomy and it is shameful for them to make light of it.

I had a vasectomy before I divorced my wife and it was exceptionally empowering. Now that i am divorced it still is. I think you must talk about this Rollo. I have so much more confidence with women because they no longer have the leverage the leverage that is fundamental to conception.

Valter Viglietti
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Rollo, vasectomy does not lead to “impotence”; it leads to “infertility”.
Since you’re bright and cultured, I’m sure you know the difference. Hence, using the word “impotence” (and more than once) in such a wrong way, makes me think some bias has clouded your judgment. Sometimes we want to think rational, but we’re still emotional instead smile
BTW, I had a vasectomy at 52 y.o., and it’s been a great choice. No more worry, freer sex, peace of mind.
Condoms? Yeah, like those fuckers never fail… No, thanks.

redlight
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redlight
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@Weyman

It would be really cool if Rollo did a youtube video on vasectomy, discussing how empowering it is, building confidence and avoiding accidental or “accidental” pregnancies. It would save men, at least save them child support payments.

John O.
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John O.
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Interestingly, there is such a thing as posthumous sperm retrieval whereby it is sometimes possible to extract viable sperm within 24 – 36 hours after death (or post mortem if you prefer Latin).

Imagine your estate liable for 9 months plus 18 years for child support, without your consent.

(I presume the procedure is medical, and not some death-grip handjob)

EhIntellect
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EhIntellect
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Only -15?

Hm, I’m losing my edge.

Anonymous Reader
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Anonymous Reader
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Gorgeous George However, I made that comment based on the experience of a friend who I’ve known since college, that I would classify as a Blue Pill Alpha, basically a Chad, was nailing chicks left and right back in college days. Then he found the One. Alpha is situational. Plenty of men have gotten Oneitis and become Betaized as a result. This doesn’t invalidate the Red Pill. Quite the opposite – if a behavior pattern can be explained and predicted, then the model is accurate … accurate enough, anyway. Fast forward to present, he’s got good paying job climbing corporate… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
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Anonymous Reader
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John O.
Of course, we can all see what this will lead to….

That article is over 10 year old. Girls write crap all the time. Point and laugh; “Oh, someone PMS’ing?” that’s all it deserves.

Sentient
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Sentient
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” I have so much more confidence with women because they no longer have the leverage the leverage that is fundamental to conception.”

This concept needs serious examination. This is pure BP/FI conditioning.

Every day babies are born to baby mommas whose dad’s suffer little consequence.

redlight
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redlight
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Every day babies are born to baby mommas whose dad’s suffer little consequence, aside from 18+ years of child support

Would you agree to assist men in paying their child support?

Sentient
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Sentient
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Relight

“Would you agree to assist men in paying their child support?”

What part of “little consequence” don’t you grasp?

redlight
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redlight
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You want men to risk 18+ years of child support but want to skip town when that comes up

Sentient
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Sentient
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Redlight

“You want men to risk 18+ years of child support but want to skip town when that comes up”

I want you to answer my question.

redlight
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redlight
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2,160,000 consequences

Remember this from last month:

“Good news is he’s a wealthy NYC lawyer so he’s on the hook for 10k a month for the next 18 years as he’s required to provide for his bastard son in the lifestyle his other children live.”

She won the lottery!

redlight
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redlight
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https://nypost.com/2017/05/27/hamptons-bachelors-are-getting-vasectomies-so-golddiggers-cant-trap-them/ Quotes: Scott typically beds up to 10 different women per summer and estimates that 20 percent of the single ladies he encounters are looking to trap a rich guy with a baby. The goal? At the very least: 18 to 21 years of child support and, in some instances, a green card for the mother, since their child would be born in the US. “This extortion happens all the time. Women come after them. [They get pregnant and] want a ransom payment,” said Shusterman. “Some guys do an analysis of the cost — for three days of discomfort [after… Read more »

John O.
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John O.
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@Redlight

re your goldiggers article –

Women are such conniving creatures that they will turn a man’s infertile status into a form of misrepresentation or fraud – “I would never have slept with him if he couldn’t make me pregnant as he claimed he wanted to. I feel as if I’ve been raped.”

Similar to the old breach of promise to marry under English common law.

Just screeching aloud in the media or courts about it would probably satisfy their id and their anger.

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