Case Study – Mitch’s Purple Pill

mitch

This week we had an interesting situation arise in the comment threads. A new(?) reader, Mitch, dropped in to recount his affair with a Ukrainian woman he’d become enamored with, emphasis mine:

I’d like to encourage men who still want a good wife to look East. As in, Russia, Ukraine and other former USSR counties. I cannot begin to tell you how encouraged and revitalized I am by this woman I met – and by most of the women I met and interacted with before I found “the One.

Full stop. Whenever a man even casually mentions a woman as ‘the ONE‘ you know he’s still clinging to his Blue Pill, feminine-primary conditioning. This is your first signal of a man’s mindset and is a glaring Beta Tell.

Next Mitch moves on to qualify the object of his, still unmet, ONEitis:

The biggest difference between these women and western women are three things: 1) They have a strong desire to find “their Right Man”. Educated, smart, attractive women with careers find life is not meaningful without husband and family. 2) What they require from a man is reliability, respectfulness and willingness to provide for a family. They want to be treated respectfully and well, but they definitely want to be treated like a woman. 3) They have no ambivalence whatsoever about being appealing to their man.

They celebrate this about themselves, their femininity and sex appeal. These women are genuine, direct, and have no time for games and are generally not interested (but are quite aware of) western feminism. Interestingly, during Soviet times women were “emancipated” from the homes and out into the factory and collectives, and the government propaganda machine even downplayed and tried to discourage marriage. So these women really know what all this means, and since the collapse of the USSR, (which has been a mixed bag for them in many ways) they have enthusiastically embraced traditional gender and marriage relationships. In fact, my woman very explicitly told me early on that she had no interest in an egalitarian relationship – and she has been very clear about what she wants and expects from me, and I couldn’t be more delighted.
(I’ve spent a week with her in person, talk on Skype a couple times a day, am meeting her in Italy in 7 weeks, after which she comes back here, hopefully for good. Oh, and she’s gorgeous and awesome in a million different ways. Wish me luck…. )

Sounds like a Blue Pill dream come true, right? I haven’t done a case study in some time so I’m going to take Mitch’s situation here and riff on it a bit. I really think it’s good to review certain fundamentals for the sake of men who are new to my work, but also for Red Pill men to understand the Blue Pill way of thinking to better help men like Mitch to unplug.

In The Purple Pill I outlined the process by which previously Red Pill men degrade themselves back into their Blue Pill mindsets. Most do this in the same fashion as someone like Tucker Max. They renounce their Red Pill behaviors and, for the most part, make attempts to compartmentalize the harsh truths they know women would rather they didn’t know or expose to other men. Guys of this Purple Pill stripe still cling (or return to clinging) to their old Blue Pill idealism in the hopes that the goals their old conditioning taught them was still possible.

This Purple Pill man still has had some exposure to, and practice with, a Red Pill awareness. The difference is that due to some life circumstance (unplanned or “accidental” pregnancy) or some part of his Beta self he was unable to disconnect from (the soul mate myth) in his Red Pill awareness.

However, Mitch represents another type of Purple Pill man. This is the guy who’s become Red Pill aware, but believes he can make his Blue Pill idealism work in a Red Pill context from the outset of his partial unplugging. As a result, there’s a certain degree of affirmation seeking men of this stripe look for from other men in Red Pill forums. That affirmation is entirely based in the false hope that he can use Red Pill truths to achieve Blue Pill goals. Thus, he looks for affirmation in this feminine-primary idealism without realizing he’s really just asking Red Pill men for their permission to persist in his Blue Pill hope while calling it Red Pill for himself.

Mitch goes on over several comments in an effort to get this permission to define his ONEitis as a Red Pill goal by qualifying her in every Blue Pill way imaginable. Needless to say the stink of Blue Pill conditioning wasn’t hard for my forum members to identify. He insists he’s read my work well enough to be considered Red Pill aware, but his actions and attitudes with this woman tell a much different story.

When called out on this fact we get the obligatory, “Lol…you guys can go fuck yourselves..

Lol…you guys can go fuck yourselves. I appreciate where ya’ll are coming from, though. Trying to save me from myself. And i appreciate how naive my post must sound to a bunch of hard core red pillers like yourselves. However, I am not nearly as inexperienced with women and LTR’s as ya’ll assume. I have learned a lot from red pill in general and this site in particular – it’s very insightful and helpful, and I’ve adjusted my attitude and posture toward women because of it. At the same time, though, it strikes me that many of you are taking on red pill ideas as a kind of ideology, and that’s its own kind of danger. The absolute certainty that ya’ll think you know all you need to know about me and my woman and my relationship from that very brief post is what I mean. As if red-pill theory, or whatever it is, completely and concisely explains the total dynamic between a man and woman. Red pill explains a lot of things really well, but certainly not the totality of the mystery that is between a man a woman in a marriage. If you don’t understand what I’m talking about, then I feel sorry for you. Red pill helps me tremendously in seeing more clearly what is going on. I totally get that I am a beta provider for her, that a large part of my appeal is what I can provide, and I get that she is turned on by alpha traits. Both of these things can coexist in the same person. Understanding this and what’s behind it makes me feel less anxious and insecure about that, because I’m more clear about what to do.

Also, being a beta provider does not make me a bitch. Providing for my woman and family is a large part of what makes me a man, and I derive great satisfaction and pride in doing so.
Also, I am not in any way “settling” for a 44 yo woman. Younger women were/are available to me, but that is not what i choose.

There’s a lot more to life than fucks and bucks, but if that’s all it is for you, then this is the type of woman you will attract. In a relationship, what you get is what you are. If I can’t find a way to live with an open heart, then I don’t know what the fucking point is. But, to each his own.

I don’t get mad with responses like this. It’s really all part of men’s unplugging. I’ve said it a million times, unplugging men from the Matrix is dirty work. Understand this now if you ever hope to aid a guy in coming to the Red Pill, there will always be a lot of anger, denial and frustration that comes from the disillusionment of breaking a man’s ego-investment in a Blue Pill mindset that he’s been conditioned to for the better part of his lifetime.

I found Mitch’s story engaging because it so faithfully follows the progression of rationales Purple Pill men will use in order to hold fast to their old, comfortable mindset. Thus, you see the binary extremes of anything that contradicts those old investments:

The absolute certainty that ya’ll think you know all you need to know about me and my woman and my relationship from that very brief post is what I mean. As if red-pill theory, or whatever it is, completely and concisely explains the total dynamic between a man and woman.

Here we see the attempt to cast doubt, but also a plea for confirmation of theory. He wants to believe that because there are no hard-fast conclusions of the uncomfortable aspects of the Red Pill that the possibility exists that his Blue Pill hopes may still be valid.

Red pill explains a lot of things really well, but certainly not the totality of the mystery that is between a man a woman in a marriage. If you don’t understand what I’m talking about, then I feel sorry for you.

Disqualification, but wrapped in the magical romantic language of Blue Pill idealism. Add a bit of pseudo-heartfelt pity for the men who wont reaffirm his idealisms.

Red pill helps me tremendously in seeing more clearly what is going on. I totally get that I am a beta provider for her, that a large part of my appeal is what I can provide, and I get that she is turned on by alpha traits. Both of these things can coexist in the same person. Understanding this and what’s behind it makes me feel less anxious and insecure about that, because I’m more clear about what to do.

Later on in the comments, Mitch tries to reassure me he’s thoroughly read my essays, but it’s obvious he hasn’t read The Myth of the Good Guy after making this comment. Most of his remaining comments are variations of this, to which he’s entirely oblivious of how apparent his Blue Pill nature is to the forum.

Feel free to read through the conversations, but they all came to a head in his most recent admission here:

 

Guys, thanks for sticking with me.

I sent her a text this morning that basically said I am going to fuck you in Italy. I love you, and this is what’s going down. We’ve had a number of conversations about sex before, about what didn’t happen in Odessa, etc. But I never pushed too hard. She says can we talk. So I skype her. And we go round and round about this. I’m staying calm, even sweet. But firm. The solipsism is off the charts – of course I’d seen this every time we argue, but eh, she’s a woman, what else is new? I just keep gently and firmly sticking to the topic, and she’s doing all she can to change it. Lashing out at me, saying I’m mentally ill, she thought I was different than other men, I’m trying to rape her, etc. Saying I’ve blown our relationship, she has all what I want, but I’m blowing it, good bye. On and on. Jesus Christ.

I’m now strongly suspecting bpd. These women are a fucking magnet for me. I did have interactions with very normal, genuine nice women over there – and tended to be religious – one very nice woman that I enjoyed talking to was very upfront from the beginning that she’s strong Catholic and will not have sex before marriage. I respect that completely. That didn’t even chase me off. It’s just that this other woman was so much more compelling. If she is bpd, she is the third experience I’ve had with this type. They are like catnip to me. Now that I see it, I’m definitely not going down that road with her because I’m all too aware of where it inevitably leads. Good. But, still..fuck!

Mitch, you’re not going to like what I’m about to type here for you, but just know that it’s a necessary kick in the ass and I’m in no way trying to flame you. As I mentioned in my last comment to you, you really need to read all of the links in my Year One collection.

I’m going to pick apart your latest report about this girl you ‘love’ and I think you should really give yourself some time to consider what you think has been your half-measure unplugging.

I sent her a text this morning that basically said I am going to fuck you in Italy. I love you, and this is what’s going down.We’ve had a number of conversations about sex before, about what didn’t happen in Odessa, etc. But I never pushed too hard. She says can we talk.

Two things here; first, you are using texting as a Buffer. This is what I would expect from a teenager or someone with an adolescent social skill set. Texting you ‘love’ her and convincing yourself you do after no more than a week of in-person interaction is a major, jumbotron-scale signal that you are not only Beta and Blue Pill, but also you subscribe to a scarcity mentality. This is rule one.

Secondly, you cannot negotiate genuine desire. You having conversations about how you’re going to fuck her in Italy are evidence that you really have no clue how Game works. Your pre-sex talks about having sex are again a major signal of your Blue Pill headspace:

Iron Rule of Tomassi #3

Any woman who makes you wait for sex, or by her actions implies she is making you wait for sex; the sex is NEVER worth the wait.

When a woman makes you wait for sex you are not her highest priority. Sexuality is spontaneous chemical reaction between two parties, not a process of negotiation. It’s sex first, then relationship, not the other way around. A woman who wants to fuck you will find a way to fuck you. She will fly across the country, crawl under barbwire, climb in through your second story bedroom window, fuck the shit out of you and wait patiently inside your closet if your wife comes home early from work – women who want to fuck will find a way to fuck. The girl who tells you she needs to be comfortable and wants a relationship first is the same girl who fucked the hot guy in the foam cannon party in Cancun on spring break just half an hour after meeting him.

Your conversations are all evidence that you buy into the ‘open communication’ Blue Pill narrative.

So I skype her. And we go round and round about this. I’m staying calm, even sweet. [Beta] But firm.[still thinking RP men will say that’s Alpha] The solipsism is off the charts – of course I’d seen this every time we argue, but eh, she’s a woman, what else is new?[attempt to confirm RP terms, and another plea for affirmation]

I just keep gently and firmly sticking to the topic, and she’s doing all she can to change it. Lashing out at me, saying I’m mentally ill, she thought I was different than other men, I’m trying to rape her, etc. Saying I’ve blown our relationship, she has all what I want, but I’m blowing it, good bye. On and on. Jesus Christ.

All this woman is doing is confirming your status as a Beta for her. Likely she thought you’d be an easy mark, but your overt insistence on preplanned, negotiated and scheduled sex has made her lose interest in you even as a Beta provider.

I’m now strongly suspecting bpd. These women are a fucking magnet for me. I did have interactions with very normal, genuine nice women over there – and tended to be religious – one very nice woman that I enjoyed talking to was very upfront from the beginning that she’s strong Catholic and will not have sex before marriage. I respect that completely.

This woman is not suffering from BPD, she’s responding how most women would when they have a man’s Beta status overtly confirmed for them. You believe these ‘types’ of women are drawn to you when in fact you have the same effect on every woman when you overtly demonstrate your lower value to them by sticking to your Beta Game while thinking it’s some how the correct, Red Pill way of dealing with women.

The only reason you believe you respect a Catholic woman is because you have no choice but to respect her because she reaffirms your Blue Pill nature, but still wont fuck you.

I’m going to invite the commenters to address Mitch’s situation in the comment thread, but I’ll start here by saying you really need to thoroughly read through my posts (or books if you prefer). You are in no way ‘woke’ to a Red Pill awareness Mitch. For as much as you believe you are, your behaviors, your mindset, all point to a guy who’s read some Red Pill ideas, but can’t disconnect from his Blue Pill hopes and attitudes.

You’re trying to force fit a Blue Pill hope into a Red Pill reality. This is why the last 3 women you’ve reported you’ve been involved with have been the same. It’s not them, it’s you.

Again, I didn’t write this post to flame you, but rather to let you serve as an example of how pervasive a Blue Pill mindset is, and how it retards a man’s social intelligence and his maturation.

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@yollo: He’s here to give us the cure to “pessimism”. I don’t have a cure for you. You either want to live in reality, or you don’t. It is much more comfortable to live in a cozy universe in which you’ve got it all figured out, and have The Answer (i.e. denial), rather than deal with life as it really is, because it’s harder. You don’t get to have the illusion of control. Is that why you guys feel so sorry for me? Poor bastard, beyond hope…. Yep, that’s exactly what we thought about other people in the cult I… Read more »

Culum Struan
Culum Struan
5 years ago

Thanks Sentient – will check out that thread (and lol at “especially Culum”). Good prep for the next Blitz in 3 weeks.

@Mitch – in all seriousness I look forward to your analysis of the Red Pill and why it is flawed. I can’t say for sure if the guys here will agree with you but you will be read and discussed with as much of an open mind as we can muster.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@sentient:

While avoiding dealing with the Russian.

Ha! Hamster shit bro. The Russian (she’s Ukrainian, but you’re not engaging with what I’m actually saying, so if it’s easier to remember we can call her the Russian.) is totally not the issue.

You don’t wanna engage ideas directly? You’re not interested in interrogating your own world view? Because you’re totally comfortable with where you’re at. You’re invested in being Red Pill Aware, because it’s become your identity? Because you might actually have to take a good, honest look at yourself?

Any of this sound familiar?

Not Born This Morning
5 years ago

Mitch- A theory can be useful and worth the effort until it’s application proves it false. This is the premis of all logical investigation. The Blue Pill, oneitis, the soul mate myth all theoretically lead to sexual satisfaction and fulfillment. In reality, they all produce frustration, misery, and in you the urge to look half way around the world….. The Red Pill is truth confirmed by its application and the failure of Blue Pill theory. Read all the posts here, read all the books recommended. This will not be brainwashing. You will begin to recognize patterns and trends you have… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“Possibly elements of truth that speak to ALL men. Every last one of them. But I don’t know, and I couldn’t possibly.” Amen “Sorry, bro. Great example of serious hamster shit. Rather than engage the ideas directly, turning the mirror outward by diagnosing me personally, prevents you from having to look at it.” The men commenters here generally think logically. As opposed to hamster shit. We are engaging the ideas directly. That is what we do. And make no mistake, we are diagnosing you personally. As is Rollo. Did you even read the original post? We are not not looking… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Mitch Any of this sound familiar?

Yes, you are still buffering as I noted earlier…

Not Born This Morning
5 years ago

Mitch- What is your purpose here? You are indicating that you transcend the rest of us, that your understanding of all this is more realistic and accurate than the RP. That the RP is some form of denial. You indicate that you are aware of a more universal truth concerning all these things than the rest of us. Share with us these understandings of reality that you have experienced that are apparently so superior to ours. I have an open mind and I’m willing to discard any false or inferior perceptions I have that prove by application to be less… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

@kfg October 14, 2016 at 6:37 pm Seems to me that will beam just over his head. Wikipedia: Psychological Projection: Projection is the psychological phenomenon where someone denies some aspect of their behavior or attitudes and assumes instead that others are doing or thinking so. It is usually seen as the externalisation of a person’s negative traits, placing blame on an outside force such as the environment, a government, a society or other people. A telltale sign of this is when a speaker says that “Everybody knows that…(a certain course of action)” is either beneficial or harmful, so society should… Read more »

Matt
Matt
5 years ago

@Not born this morning Thanks for the book recommendation – author Jon Ratey is a Harvard MD professor – looks good, i put it on my reading list @SJF I picked up “Sapiens” because it was mentioned by Bill Gates in an interview i listened a year ago or so. He didn´t totally agree with everything in it as far i remember, but strongly recommended it. And last time i recommended it to someone was actually last sunday – the guy ordered it on monday, start reading on tuesday, and wrote me a mail yesterday to thank me for it.… Read more »

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

Mitch R U Mad yet? Check out the SMV for men and women.Ever sit in a titty bar and worship that shit with your eyes? fn dumbstruck. When you see that deer in the headlights look in her eyes she is yours,although we have been programed to find this look unattractive.Think about it the less attractive girls do this often and the less attractive guys do it to(bad game face). AWALT they have learned to get by with as little effort as possible,,,most have no qualms about using a dumbstruck dude to death,after all he is totaly unattractive and such… Read more »

walawala
walawala
5 years ago

This post should have come with a “Trigger warning”. Guys who are unplugged or nearly unplugged read about Mitch and are either outraged because we see our old selves or they regard him as a troll deliberately provoking with his sadly misguided and naïve comments. Mitch is how 90% of guys think….or they get slightly unplugged, find a girlfriend using game…regard her as “special” and then fall back into their old ways. Red Pill thinking is about independence of thought, but it’s also about acceptance that there are guys out there like Mitch. It’s also another proof point that you… Read more »

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

Mitch

I can still remember the first LTR,ego invested relationship,damn I felt like I could fly,addictive!

There goes my future ex wife In loove agian(lust) ego investment( she likes meeee).

Addictive.

Metal point of origin gone with the wind.

What are the men like in her country,worse providers? more masculine?

Matt
Matt
5 years ago

you nailed it.

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

Walawala

“But the point isn’t ruminating about some failed relationship or lost opportunity to number close or f-close. The point is to become more comfortable at trying. That is the essence of Game. It’s the fear that keeps guys like Mitch stuck. It’s the fear of dumping his 43 year old exotic unicorn that prevents him from finding that inner strength to live each day confident he’s at his best.”

This here is tighter than an ugly tenth grader!

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@calum: @Mitch – in all seriousness I look forward to your analysis of the Red Pill and why it is flawed. I can’t say for sure if the guys here will agree with you but you will be read and discussed with as much of an open mind as we can muster. Calum, thanks for bearing with me. Red Pill is NOT flawed per se. It’s pretty brilliant, and it’s not that easy to come up with a coherent, logical, internally consistent world view. But it is indeed a Totalist system, and it should be recognized as such. There isn’t… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago
Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

:

This post should have come with a “Trigger warning”. Guys who are unplugged or nearly unplugged read about Mitch and are either outraged because we see our old selves or they regard him as a troll deliberately provoking with his sadly misguided and naïve comments,

I gave you the trigger warning walawala. If you choose to continue to read my posts, you do so at your own peril.

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“But it is indeed a Totalist system, and it should be recognized as such.”

You keep saying that. You must have been in a cult when you were young.

A social, economic and/or political system in which some authority (e.g. the state or “the market”) wields absolute power; totalitarianism.  

A philosophy, ideology or belief system that is total in its scope, one that covers everything.

Red pill awareness is not totalist.

And Frame is not power.

Good Game is power, though.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

:

Red Pill thinking is about independence of thought

It is actually the direct opposite of that. You just don’t see it yet.

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago
stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago
walawala
walawala
5 years ago

@Mitch Your post was interesting, but now you’re just trolling. Guys here are serious about wanting to unplug and sometimes they don’t get it.

You get it but you don’t want to unplug, you’re the lung cancer patient who keeps smoking because “it relaxes me”…

We’ve thrown you a rope and you’ve shown us you can swim you just don’t want to. I’m ok with that. Most of my friends are in the same boat…they can fix their own situation if they just ride it out.

Meet Softek….

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@SJF: You keep saying that. You must have been in a cult when you were young I was in a cult when I was young. You must have missed it, but I said it earlier. Another thing I said was that cults don’t actually attract stupid people, but highly intelligent ones, people who are capable of and enjoy thinking. I met some Moonies when I was 19, and went to one of their group houses for lunch. They were a friendly, interesting, interested, international group of people, saying some really interesting things. When nobody was looking I snooped around looking… Read more »

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago
Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

:

@Mitch Your post was interesting, but now you’re just trolling. Guys here are serious about wanting to unplug and sometimes they don’t get it.

I’m completely serious. I’m not doing this to score points, or “win”, or get attention, or cause trouble for trouble’s sake.

Blaximus
5 years ago

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition…..

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

Seriously the totalist system is egalitarianism,feminism,gynocentrism.

Mineter
Mineter
5 years ago

So, Mitch, what are you trying to achieve here?

I don’t give a fuck if it’s leather bound with gold embossing, I’m not interested in buying your reprint of the First Set of Books.

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition…..”

I certainly didn’t. Fortunately in his later years Franco was a bit mellower and his boys settled for a lot of glowering to make the point.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@stuffinbox:

I can still remember the first LTR,ego invested relationship,damn I felt like I could fly,addictive!

Dude, I have no interest in defending my relationship – even to myself. I’ve asked her a few very pointed questions, which were prompted by things guys have said here. By the advice that men have shared with me. I haven’t gotten an answer to those questions, and I don’t know if I will. I am prepared to let her go if I don’t get the answers I need.

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

It is almost as if w i ld m an is on some new meds that aren’t working,another purple pill?

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@mineter:

I don’t give a fuck if it’s leather bound with gold embossing, I’m not interested in buying your reprint of the First Set of Books.

lol. I’m probably too lazy to write a book. I just want men to think. That’s all.

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

Mitch

Not attacking your relationship just sharing about mine.It is to easy to get ego invested in a woman,they actually encourage it at some point.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@stuffin:

Seriously the totalist system is egalitarianism,feminism,gynocentrism.

You’re starting to get it. One difference though, is that these philosophies are too diffuse to actually be Totalist. There isn’t a universally acknowledged authority that all submit to, there isn’t a Jargon that is universally agreed upon and understood. There is policing of orthodoxy of course, but nobody really cares.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

And there certainly isn’t a logical, coherent, internally consistent system that contemporary feminism, gynocentrism, etc operate under. Certainly not one that most would agree on.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@stuffin:

Not attacking your relationship just sharing about mine.It is to easy to get ego invested in a woman,they actually encourage it at some point.

Cool. True that.

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

“You’re starting to get it. One difference though, is that these philosophies are too diffuse to actually be Totalist. There isn’t a universally acknowledged authority that all submit to, there isn’t a Jargon that is universally agreed upon and understood. There is policing of orthodoxy of course, but nobody really cares.”

Good luck with that Mitch.

Keith
Keith
5 years ago

Mitch first off I wish I had your problems going to Italy to fuck with a Russian oh poor you. Some of us have to pay child support and bang the fat chick at the end of the bar. I don’t think your a troll. I think you revert back to your basic training. It’s like a soldier when the shit hits the fan you go back to your basic training. I’m a Christian I can read the tora but it don’t make me a Jew. I read the Koran but it don’t make me Muslim. Just cause a man… Read more »

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

Mitch
Does it seem to you that Rollo is motivated?

Scroll up to the search box enter “why bother’ on that page scroll down to “what is your problem’ click it and read.

Matt
Matt
5 years ago

@Mitch Here is the thing: we can´t help you. Nobody can. But for all the guys that read this today, tomorrow or in 5 years from now, i try one more time, with a different angle. Mitch, you complained that 1. you are a total stranger 2. we only know what you wrote here and still “everyone who is RP Aware knows, without a shadow of a doubt, what’s going on. Thats absurd”. No it is not. To spice things up even further, i freely admit that i didn´t read most of your posts. I only skimmed them. Most of… Read more »

Edelweiss
Edelweiss
5 years ago

Reading through the comments from and to Mitch about the “Ukrainicorn” are exhausting. Call me crazy, but the task of vetting a woman who stands to gain tremendously (citizenship, financial support), looks a tad difficult Mitch. Good thing women never conceal anything (ill intent,unflattering personal history) from men. Not to mention the fact that 44yo women are notoriously super horny! What could go wrong? If you do marry her, and she did decide to divorce you, at least you know the courts have your back, right? LOL

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Mitch
I just want men to think

Irony.

Red Pill is praxology, not ideology. There’s your problem.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@edelweiss:

Reading through the comments from and to Mitch about the “Ukrainicorn” are exhausting.

It’s exhausting to me too, but a lot of them are really hilarious. You are reading almost no comments from me about the “Ukrainicorn”. Excellent coinage.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@stuffin:

Scroll up to the search box enter “why bother’ on that page scroll down to “what is your problem’ click it and read.

That’s an excellent essay. It’s very dramatic and relatable. Great for establishing a powerful raison d’etre for inducing RP Awareness. I’m too tired to develop this thought tonight, but I’ll come back to it tomorrow. Thanks for pointing it out.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@keith:

And if you was spending the energy chasing that Russian pussy that you spend talking to red pill guys you’d already have wet dick and a soar back.

that’s probably true, brother! but you guys are much more interesting. I bet you could do better than the fat chick at the end of the bar. RP is the tool. Praxology, as someone said above. I’m totally down with that.

escapeartist
escapeartist
5 years ago

Hey Guys, I am in need of some advice. I am in my mid thirties and have been married with kids for 13 years now. I discovered Rollo’s blog about two years ago and feel like I have a fairly solid understanding of redpill concepts at this point but am still trying to apply them effectively in hopes of keeping my family together for the kids. Like most guys, when I got married I was in much better shape physically and mentally and had some natural alpha traits along with a higher SMV than my wife who was fat. We… Read more »

Mineter
Mineter
5 years ago

@escapteartist Please feel free to disregard the following if you only want expert, OMG, RP advice. I have many similarities to you and your situation, however, I certainly don’t claim to be an expert or that I have a “successful” marriage. I’d start with the book “Married Man Sex Life” by Athol Kay. I’m not sure if Athol’s been disavowed here for having turned Purple Pill or some such, but there’s enough useful stuff in there to get you on your way to a happier and better self, if not into a happier and better marriage. His follow up book,… Read more »

escapeartist
escapeartist
5 years ago

@Mineter Thanks for the response. Any redpill advice is welcome. I have actually heard that Athol Kay is considered purple pill. In fact, Rollo mentioned him in “The Purple Pill”. The Mindful Action Plan does seem useful though. I may check it out. Of course, I have pondered all of those questions ad nauseam over the past couple of years. I do want to stay with my wife mostly for my son who is 9, so I’ve got a long way to go before I’m in the clear as far as child support goes. She also is still fun to… Read more »

escapeartist
escapeartist
5 years ago

@Palmasailor Why wouldn’t he?

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Hey, Escapeartist

comment image

I think it about time you start doing the opposite of your compulsions and instincts. When you come to a fork in the road decide on one way and take the other.

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

escapeartist

Wow man,you are making alot of changes very quickly.Are you able to keep up and still lead.

Friend or not she needs security,you are the backbone of the family.Never show any uncertainty or complain about anything,after all your best thinking got you where you are today.

Good to see Mitch get some sleep maybe he isn’t an elaborate chatbox.

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“I don’t have time to focus on my business, develop our homestead . . .”

“. . . she doesn’t have enough to do . . .”

” . . . she is obese . . . ”

These are all symptoms of a single problem. Fix it.

If you cannot, abandon your idea of being self-sustaining. It is doomed.

Matt
Matt
5 years ago

@Palmasailor Hahaha, your comment made my day. And yes, if Mitch will start giving advice to escapeartist, this will be hilarious. @escapeartist I don´t feel qualified to give you any advice. Without the fact that you have a 9 year old boy, advice would be obviously a no brainer (get out of this marriage now, you are still young, it is way easier to start over again than making this thing work). But now you are also responsible for the well being of your boy. I think Mineter did a great job asking you important questions, you should take your… Read more »

escapeartist
escapeartist
5 years ago

@stuffinbox

Yes, my decisions have been extreme, probably even irrisponsible but I don’t care anymore. I provided stability for 12 years and the returns simply were not justifying the required investment. So, I cashed out.

Yes, I’m taking my family on a bumpy ride but I believe the destination will be worth it. If I turn out to be wrong well the previous destination was no place worth visiting either.

Colbert
Colbert
5 years ago

Be anything you want, or nothing at all, but be authentic and be congruent. She’s looking for THAT and she will pick up on it if it’s not reflected back to her from the man she is with. It’s what she wants…and it’s what she will try to get. Her hypergamy doesn’t want to settle for less then the real deal – an unshakable and genuine consistent frame. This song is about Shirley Manson’s perspective on a girl friend’s lack of authenticity and wasted potential. Female BP translation: don’t be that girl “who settles for less than what she wants”.… Read more »

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago

escapeartist “Yes, my decisions have been extreme, probably even irrisponsible but I don’t care anymore. I provided stability for 12 years and the returns simply were not justifying the required investment. So, I cashed out.” Extreme,irresponsible,whatever not the point,life is a bumpy ride,i can be just as poor here on the mountain as I can in the city. The point is,someone has to wear the pants,if I don’t she will,then things get twisted,nobody is happy then.The stabilty isn’t only financial,the stability is more mental.Go ahead reconoiter set your priorities,make a forward plan,delegate responsibility,never let them see you sweat,don’t show any… Read more »

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@Rollo: I find it funny that your father was atheist and BP and you are religious (correct?) and RP.

I’d expect the reverse combination.

Incidentally, I think there are a lot of formerly religious men in RP and particularly noticed that in MRP (and former military as well). I don’t think it is a coincidence.

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@Sentient: I find it is harder to keep conversations going on two comment threads. You mention many times Dynamic, Passionate and Authentic as the alpha triad. I thought a nice thought exercise for me to better figure out what each of those mean would be to identify what are examples of men like that have 2 of those but are missing one. I only have a good idea for the DP combo, as missing Authentic means there is a lack of congruence. DP – PUAs at the recovering AFC level, before they are congruent. Like when his external skills had… Read more »

stuffinbox
stuffinbox
5 years ago
YaReally
5 years ago

@newlyaloof “And speaking of going to a bar, and thinking back at @YaReally comment about Halloween, it’s not to early this weekend to ask the young ladies, “So have you put any thought into what you’ll be for Halloween yet?”” Yup, and for a month afterward you can ask what they were for Halloween too. But don’t just ask, QUALIFY THEM on it. Instead of “So what is/was your halloween costume? Oh, that’s a cool idea!” bla bla, apply Julien’s “boring conversation” stuff (Julien free PIMP vids on YouTube) to add authoritative/qualifying tonalities to it. “What’s your costume going to… Read more »

YaReally
5 years ago

@Mitch “I sent her a text this morning that basically said I am going to fuck you in Italy. I love you, and this is what’s going down. We’ve had a number of conversations about sex before, about what didn’t happen in Odessa, etc. But I never pushed too hard. She says can we talk. So I skype her. And we go round and round about this.” lol she’s not BPD, you just don’t understand how she sees you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGEO6ig8WsM&t=8s The fact that you haven’t dumped her ass for not fucking you is why you aren’t allowed to act like… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“WHAT SHE’S 44??!?!?!?”

With full baggage train.

Demanding a rock for it.

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@kfg: and she would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for you meddling rational males.

escapeartist
escapeartist
5 years ago

@stuffinbox

I get what you’re saying…will keep that in mind. Thanks.

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@Sentient and @kfg: following from the HB scale and %s discussion at the end of the previous comment thread. The one I use as calibration is Katy Perry from a few years ago (HB9 for me). She was good enough for Russell Brand to want to marry, even if briefly… And that guy has massive Game. How do you rank her? Another one I find really pretty is the girl in this video: https://therationalmale.com/2016/09/13/stalling-for-time/#comment-169628 HB8+, maybe even 9 for me. I find both of them prettier than all of the ones Sentient posted here: https://therationalmale.com/2016/10/07/environmental-stresses/comment-page-6/#comment-173553 I mean I can see… Read more »

ManlyMan
ManlyMan
5 years ago

Gender Guesser analysis of “Mitch’s” posts reveal finding of weak female probably European. I Wild Person back?

EhIntellect
EhIntellect
5 years ago

@ sentient Thank you for your reply. Months ago I reinstituted 4 point bed post ropes restraining her limbs prone at times. Mouth gag too. I’ve been two hand choking her while banging, firm but not bruising. Fucking her looking at the mirror and demanding she stare at me. Slapping her ass, pulling hair. Binding her arms, fucking her bent over the bed. She wakes up the next day and asks me sometimes where all her shin scrapes and rug and rope burns came from. I think she kinda blacks out after an hour or so of fucking. I’ve poured… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

IAS What DPA represents are the irreducible traits that all Aphas have, regardless of their position, background, condition, SES etc. I was looking for the essential elements that were shared… How few I could get to. These seem to be the fewest, and are amoral. My theory as to why is here: Dynamic – passionate – authentic = alpha. Dynamic – a bias for action, initiation, invention. These are male life giving and sustaining traits. A man siting on his ass ain’t bringing in mastodon meat or discovering how to make fire or exploring and conquering new territories or defending… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

IAS

Rate Katy Perry

IRL a 6…

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escapeartist
escapeartist
5 years ago

@Colbert Yep, congruency is key. I actually think it is the most challenging part of the redpill. When you first start trying to shed your preconditioned beta behaviors you’re having to consciously think about what to say and do to pass shit test. So, it automatically feels awkward and incongruent, which can be difficult to hide. I’ve noticed the proper alpha responses and behaviors become more natural with time. Obviously, practicing PUA in field and consistently flirting with more girls could speed things up significantly. But it can be difficult to get out and do that regularly being married. Most… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

EhIntellect HABD is probably right then… A few years in into my now 25 year marriage, the wife thought she would do one of the old Hollywood movie slaps to me, during an argument. At the time arguing and then having crazy make up sense was a pattern, developing after the first kid… well I know all about it now. But w/e. Anyhow she pulls her right hand back to slap me and as it comes forward I grab her wrist with my right hand, yank her arm down across her body, leaving her face totally exposed as I cock… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Escapeartist

why not just actually increase your value and let your subcoms naturally change to match? In other words, achieving ones personal life goals and becoming more physically, mentally and socially dominant should automatically make you more alpha without having to spend too much time learning PUA skills.

YES! Life supra game… see the DPA Triad above…

j
j
5 years ago

Oh man almost fucked my first 10. That comment by YaReally on comfort zone really challenged me to step my game up. Guys were offer her drinks all night and she ignored them. She then bought me a shot lol (couple months ago my vibe would have been ‘holy shit’. But now it’s all ‘yeah duh of course girls buy me drink’) I asked her in the cab what was it that won you over. ( I’m very young, but not a “Chad” looks-wise or rich) and she said, “aggressive persistence”. Game > looks

NewbieOnPoint
NewbieOnPoint
5 years ago

@EscapeArtist,Sentient “why not just actually increase your value and let your subcoms naturally change to match? In other words, achieving ones personal life goals and becoming more physically, mentally and socially dominant should automatically make you more alpha without having to spend too much time learning PUA skills.” This is bad advise. I don’t mean it’s bad to succeed in whatever you aim for. However, believing this automatically translates into PUA skills is BS. YaReally* is absolutely right on this. I know this, because I have done the things you say, and still do, but it doesn’t translate into PUA.… Read more »

ollieoxenfree1
ollieoxenfree1
5 years ago

Desire isn’t negotiable, but sex is. When a woman moves from Alpha fuck to Beta provider. A woman weighs up her priorities and who can best achieve them. She’s negotiating (even if it’s with herself). Mitch wasn’t negotiating desire, but the terms for sex. Most of us have been where Mitch is now. My Mitch moment came for me when I was 19. She was 19 also and from the Czech Republic. We met in a nightclub. She gave me all the IOI and acquiesced to join me at the bar, when I indicated we do so. She didn’t want… Read more »

escapeartist
escapeartist
5 years ago

@Newbieonpoint Maybe it depends on what the goals we’re succeeding at actually are. What I mean is that we often set very ambitious goals for ourselves because they will increase our status, wealth, prestige, etc. Usually though, the higher you climb the harder you have to hold on to keep from slipping. So, the additional responsibility and resulting stress that comes with increasing levels of status ends up offsetting your gains in other areas. This is because stress has an enormous impact on your subcoms and even testosterone levels. As a result, you put in all this effort to accomplish… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

YaReally
Yup, and for a month afterward you can ask what they were for Halloween too. But don’t just ask, QUALIFY THEM on it.

In fact I just got my hair cut, asked the cutter what she’s going as, she doesn’t know yet. She was a pirate last year. She expects lots of girls dressing as Harley Quinn because movie, and then said maybe her mom is gonna dress up as Harley.

So there’s one hook – ‘Oh, you’re going as Harley? So’s my friends MOTHER!”

escapeartist
escapeartist
5 years ago

Also, a lot probably has to do with our true motives for pursuing those goals. If we are really just trying to make ourselves appear more impressive to others (especially women) then no mater how successful we are women will just see it as a form of approval seeking (huge DLV), lowering our AF status while only increasing our value as BB. On the other hand, if our accomplishments provide us with more free time and a truly improved quality of life then they have intrinsic value and it is much more likely that our motives were coming from a… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
5 years ago

@All – Re: Mitch – I know I shouldn’t do this, but… @Mitch – You aren’t as smart as you think you are, one of the most dangerous character defects a man can have. Tell us all here, please, what is praxeology? How does praxeology differ from ideology? You miss that Rollo is intentionally descriptive and empirical, and the “jargon” you castigate are labels for types of behavior observed. They are not elements of faith or components of an overarching ideology, they are merely observations. Many of us speculate on what to best do with them, some guys get married,… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Newbieonpoint

I don’t mean it’s bad to succeed in whatever you aim for. However, believing this automatically translates into PUA skills is BS.

Go on… expand your thought here. We are not talking about “success” but the characteristics of people who are “successful”…

Show me a PUA or game technique that does not align with the Alpha Triad.

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

“Mitch didn’t get played.”

Oh come now… he flew someplace and spent a solid week with his 44YO and didn’t get a handy from it….

he only approached his form of ultimatum after getting beaten around the head and neck here from his posts…

when you play with yourself instead of having sex with a girl you spend a full week cohabitating with… and you want to have sex with her… you’ve been played pal.

EhIntellect
EhIntellect
5 years ago

@ Sentient

What’s HABD?

Fun conversation. I’ve entered a surreal part of my 17-year marriage. I’m oddly at ease with all of it. I’d never talk to anyone I know about it otherwise. Friends are oblivious or even defiant about the truth spoken here.

Again, y’all are great.

Anders Munch
5 years ago

https://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-58824.html

Hey Rollo, If you read the link I outlined a physical experiment that will prove women don’t think like men, instead of just having it show up in lab results. The article is called, Civilization is on the Y-chromosome. It matches nicely with what you yourself have described about Honour and how men’s hunting abilities have developed.

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

Gentlemen, I’ve decided to leave you in peace and go set up my own blog to talk about this stuff. I’m going to call it “The Circular (but Highly Rational!) Male” It will be both an homage and a ruthless smackdown of TRM. Not to undermine, but to engage it critically. This is not happening here, and I think it needs to be to make RP theory more accessible to more men. A creative dialogue with TRM. I will start writing about the circular, Totalist nature of RP as articulated by Rollo, so that folks who want to “unplug” from… Read more »

Mitch
Mitch
5 years ago

@scribbl:

It’s ok, man. I have bad days too.

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Ehintellect

HABD is Having A Bad Day

He is usually on point… may take you a test or two but he is the real deal. he made this comment to you

https://therationalmale.com/2016/10/13/case-study-mitchs-purple-pill/comment-page-2/#comment-173568

Colbert
Colbert
5 years ago

@ Escapeartist, “when you play with yourself instead of having sex with a girl you spend a full week cohabitating with… and you want to have sex with her… you’ve been played pal.” – Sentient. That whole week he spent with, her he was pretending to be somebody he wasn’t. He was adjusting to her frame. He wasn’t really being true to himself, he wasn’t being authentic and he wasn’t being unapologetic about it. He didn’t know how to. That’s beta. He was pretending to be the man he thought she wanted him to be (whether he was aware of… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

“Mitch”
That women – ALL women – have inherent worth and dignity as human beings and are entitled to respect on that basis alone.

Now, where have I seen that particular phrasing before?

jamesd127
jamesd127
5 years ago

You cannot be red pill if you do not know, and truly internalize, that women are incapable of making good decisions for themselves except under male supervision, that women should never have been emancipated, that women need and want male supervision and control however much they may resist what they need and want.

Marriage is an arrangement where a woman gets the protection from herself that she needs.

Ricky Veee
Ricky Veee
5 years ago

Ironic. This guy is looking for marriage but Tomassi calls him out for it. The only way to be 100 percent red pill alpha is no marrige. Tomassi is a hypocrite because he is married with kids. There is no way to be married in the west without being blue or purple. I doubt Tomassi is banging 10’s staying out all night and having his food on the table when he is ready to eat. Grow uo gents this site is a guide, but less than 1 percent actually live it

jamesd127
jamesd127
5 years ago
Reply to  Ricky Veee

The morally right solution is that all women should be firmly under loving male authority for their own good. And if the law and society is hostile to the morally right solution it is up to us to implement anyway in defiance of the law.

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

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kobayashii1681
5 years ago
Reply to  kfg

@kfg: pedestalisation statue pic – you’re killing it today bruv! 😂😂😂

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Ricky Vee

Step to the mic son… Tell us about yo self…

What did you have for dinner? Who cooked it? What did she look like?

You old or young? Married, single incel, single volcel, single having some sex or single having all the sex you want with women you want? Or gay? Can’t leave that out these day.

Do tell…. 100% intrrested.

Our experience shapes our perceptions and all…

Blaximus
5 years ago

@ Ricky Few Shutdafuckup with that drivel. @ Rollo Lol. Maaannnn…. I’m starting to get extremely tired of the whole married=blue pill nonsense and I feel a YaReally 36 inch long text-a-palooza, with bad words, in the near future. Most men only understand one way to be married or engage in an ltr. I get it. But the ignorant and smug pronouncements are deserving of a smackdown from time to time. Do me a solid, don’t post up any links for Ricky. Fuck the trolls. …..bitch made me put down my jumbo shrimp cocktail when I read his comment. The… Read more »

Yollo Comanche
Yollo Comanche
5 years ago

It’s finally happening. Dickbowl is here. White Knights vs. Edgelords vs. People who can have whatever life they like vs. People who tried to have it and failed. Good. Maybe all the faggots trying to put up their tents in the manosphere could do that AFTER getting our rights back? Much of the Red Pill happened to try to LEVEL the playing field between men and women but there’s always some flowery, “enlightened”, anti-social schmuck trying to come in and sanitize the work of others without having any capacity to acknowledge the way such work as instrumental in emboldening their… Read more »

Blaximus
5 years ago

@ Sentient

… well, my wife made me a shrimp cocktail for a snack when I mentioned that I had a taste for something different as a snack.

Giant shrimp….which is funny when you think about it…GIANT shrimp. Lol.

Btw I’ve been following your ” it’s not them, it’s you ” thing on the other thread. Brother, holy shit. I have been pouring through my memory banks on that one.

You are right. Rollo said so much in so few words. I’ll be chewing on this all week long.

Stay up!!!

verbarglaucus
verbarglaucus
5 years ago

Mitch, I detect within your words a tyrannical ego that prevents your reconciliation with the truth. Just pretend for five minutes that you are wrong about everything; act like an infant who knows absolutely nothing, but is totally open to the world around him. It will help you understand what exactly happened and why. Think about it: How could you actually have a solid understanding of internal and external game when you handled both so poorly? Because everybody fucks up from time to time? That’s true, but the difference between the fool and the master lies in corrective self-reflection. And… Read more »

Blaximus
5 years ago

Oh, and before I go consuming mass quantities of vsop, a big shout out to all of the newbie commenters ( except Ricky…). Great to see y’all add your 2 cents.

Mad props fellas.

Novaseeker
Novaseeker
5 years ago

@kfg —

The smart girls get paid good dollar for that these days, really.

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Blax

My 5’7 120lb wife with abs and a yoga ass made me bratwurst and a salad… Poured my wine. After i came in from a bar watching college ball this afterrnoon… After telling me to join her in the shower this morning… Unprompted…

But at 48 she is old and wrinkly and ….

Lol…

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Novaseeker to kfg
The smart girls get paid good dollar for that these days, really.

Yup. NYC, Vegas, L.A.

Dubai / Emirates for sure. Probably doesn’t look exactly like that, though.

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