Case Study – Mitch’s Purple Pill

mitch

This week we had an interesting situation arise in the comment threads. A new(?) reader, Mitch, dropped in to recount his affair with a Ukrainian woman he’d become enamored with, emphasis mine:

I’d like to encourage men who still want a good wife to look East. As in, Russia, Ukraine and other former USSR counties. I cannot begin to tell you how encouraged and revitalized I am by this woman I met – and by most of the women I met and interacted with before I found “the One.

Full stop. Whenever a man even casually mentions a woman as ‘the ONE‘ you know he’s still clinging to his Blue Pill, feminine-primary conditioning. This is your first signal of a man’s mindset and is a glaring Beta Tell.

Next Mitch moves on to qualify the object of his, still unmet, ONEitis:

The biggest difference between these women and western women are three things: 1) They have a strong desire to find “their Right Man”. Educated, smart, attractive women with careers find life is not meaningful without husband and family. 2) What they require from a man is reliability, respectfulness and willingness to provide for a family. They want to be treated respectfully and well, but they definitely want to be treated like a woman. 3) They have no ambivalence whatsoever about being appealing to their man.

They celebrate this about themselves, their femininity and sex appeal. These women are genuine, direct, and have no time for games and are generally not interested (but are quite aware of) western feminism. Interestingly, during Soviet times women were “emancipated” from the homes and out into the factory and collectives, and the government propaganda machine even downplayed and tried to discourage marriage. So these women really know what all this means, and since the collapse of the USSR, (which has been a mixed bag for them in many ways) they have enthusiastically embraced traditional gender and marriage relationships. In fact, my woman very explicitly told me early on that she had no interest in an egalitarian relationship – and she has been very clear about what she wants and expects from me, and I couldn’t be more delighted.
(I’ve spent a week with her in person, talk on Skype a couple times a day, am meeting her in Italy in 7 weeks, after which she comes back here, hopefully for good. Oh, and she’s gorgeous and awesome in a million different ways. Wish me luck…. )

Sounds like a Blue Pill dream come true, right? I haven’t done a case study in some time so I’m going to take Mitch’s situation here and riff on it a bit. I really think it’s good to review certain fundamentals for the sake of men who are new to my work, but also for Red Pill men to understand the Blue Pill way of thinking to better help men like Mitch to unplug.

In The Purple Pill I outlined the process by which previously Red Pill men degrade themselves back into their Blue Pill mindsets. Most do this in the same fashion as someone like Tucker Max. They renounce their Red Pill behaviors and, for the most part, make attempts to compartmentalize the harsh truths they know women would rather they didn’t know or expose to other men. Guys of this Purple Pill stripe still cling (or return to clinging) to their old Blue Pill idealism in the hopes that the goals their old conditioning taught them was still possible.

This Purple Pill man still has had some exposure to, and practice with, a Red Pill awareness. The difference is that due to some life circumstance (unplanned or “accidental” pregnancy) or some part of his Beta self he was unable to disconnect from (the soul mate myth) in his Red Pill awareness.

However, Mitch represents another type of Purple Pill man. This is the guy who’s become Red Pill aware, but believes he can make his Blue Pill idealism work in a Red Pill context from the outset of his partial unplugging. As a result, there’s a certain degree of affirmation seeking men of this stripe look for from other men in Red Pill forums. That affirmation is entirely based in the false hope that he can use Red Pill truths to achieve Blue Pill goals. Thus, he looks for affirmation in this feminine-primary idealism without realizing he’s really just asking Red Pill men for their permission to persist in his Blue Pill hope while calling it Red Pill for himself.

Mitch goes on over several comments in an effort to get this permission to define his ONEitis as a Red Pill goal by qualifying her in every Blue Pill way imaginable. Needless to say the stink of Blue Pill conditioning wasn’t hard for my forum members to identify. He insists he’s read my work well enough to be considered Red Pill aware, but his actions and attitudes with this woman tell a much different story.

When called out on this fact we get the obligatory, “Lol…you guys can go fuck yourselves..

Lol…you guys can go fuck yourselves. I appreciate where ya’ll are coming from, though. Trying to save me from myself. And i appreciate how naive my post must sound to a bunch of hard core red pillers like yourselves. However, I am not nearly as inexperienced with women and LTR’s as ya’ll assume. I have learned a lot from red pill in general and this site in particular – it’s very insightful and helpful, and I’ve adjusted my attitude and posture toward women because of it. At the same time, though, it strikes me that many of you are taking on red pill ideas as a kind of ideology, and that’s its own kind of danger. The absolute certainty that ya’ll think you know all you need to know about me and my woman and my relationship from that very brief post is what I mean. As if red-pill theory, or whatever it is, completely and concisely explains the total dynamic between a man and woman. Red pill explains a lot of things really well, but certainly not the totality of the mystery that is between a man a woman in a marriage. If you don’t understand what I’m talking about, then I feel sorry for you. Red pill helps me tremendously in seeing more clearly what is going on. I totally get that I am a beta provider for her, that a large part of my appeal is what I can provide, and I get that she is turned on by alpha traits. Both of these things can coexist in the same person. Understanding this and what’s behind it makes me feel less anxious and insecure about that, because I’m more clear about what to do.

Also, being a beta provider does not make me a bitch. Providing for my woman and family is a large part of what makes me a man, and I derive great satisfaction and pride in doing so.
Also, I am not in any way “settling” for a 44 yo woman. Younger women were/are available to me, but that is not what i choose.

There’s a lot more to life than fucks and bucks, but if that’s all it is for you, then this is the type of woman you will attract. In a relationship, what you get is what you are. If I can’t find a way to live with an open heart, then I don’t know what the fucking point is. But, to each his own.

I don’t get mad with responses like this. It’s really all part of men’s unplugging. I’ve said it a million times, unplugging men from the Matrix is dirty work. Understand this now if you ever hope to aid a guy in coming to the Red Pill, there will always be a lot of anger, denial and frustration that comes from the disillusionment of breaking a man’s ego-investment in a Blue Pill mindset that he’s been conditioned to for the better part of his lifetime.

I found Mitch’s story engaging because it so faithfully follows the progression of rationales Purple Pill men will use in order to hold fast to their old, comfortable mindset. Thus, you see the binary extremes of anything that contradicts those old investments:

The absolute certainty that ya’ll think you know all you need to know about me and my woman and my relationship from that very brief post is what I mean. As if red-pill theory, or whatever it is, completely and concisely explains the total dynamic between a man and woman.

Here we see the attempt to cast doubt, but also a plea for confirmation of theory. He wants to believe that because there are no hard-fast conclusions of the uncomfortable aspects of the Red Pill that the possibility exists that his Blue Pill hopes may still be valid.

Red pill explains a lot of things really well, but certainly not the totality of the mystery that is between a man a woman in a marriage. If you don’t understand what I’m talking about, then I feel sorry for you.

Disqualification, but wrapped in the magical romantic language of Blue Pill idealism. Add a bit of pseudo-heartfelt pity for the men who wont reaffirm his idealisms.

Red pill helps me tremendously in seeing more clearly what is going on. I totally get that I am a beta provider for her, that a large part of my appeal is what I can provide, and I get that she is turned on by alpha traits. Both of these things can coexist in the same person. Understanding this and what’s behind it makes me feel less anxious and insecure about that, because I’m more clear about what to do.

Later on in the comments, Mitch tries to reassure me he’s thoroughly read my essays, but it’s obvious he hasn’t read The Myth of the Good Guy after making this comment. Most of his remaining comments are variations of this, to which he’s entirely oblivious of how apparent his Blue Pill nature is to the forum.

Feel free to read through the conversations, but they all came to a head in his most recent admission here:

 

Guys, thanks for sticking with me.

I sent her a text this morning that basically said I am going to fuck you in Italy. I love you, and this is what’s going down. We’ve had a number of conversations about sex before, about what didn’t happen in Odessa, etc. But I never pushed too hard. She says can we talk. So I skype her. And we go round and round about this. I’m staying calm, even sweet. But firm. The solipsism is off the charts – of course I’d seen this every time we argue, but eh, she’s a woman, what else is new? I just keep gently and firmly sticking to the topic, and she’s doing all she can to change it. Lashing out at me, saying I’m mentally ill, she thought I was different than other men, I’m trying to rape her, etc. Saying I’ve blown our relationship, she has all what I want, but I’m blowing it, good bye. On and on. Jesus Christ.

I’m now strongly suspecting bpd. These women are a fucking magnet for me. I did have interactions with very normal, genuine nice women over there – and tended to be religious – one very nice woman that I enjoyed talking to was very upfront from the beginning that she’s strong Catholic and will not have sex before marriage. I respect that completely. That didn’t even chase me off. It’s just that this other woman was so much more compelling. If she is bpd, she is the third experience I’ve had with this type. They are like catnip to me. Now that I see it, I’m definitely not going down that road with her because I’m all too aware of where it inevitably leads. Good. But, still..fuck!

Mitch, you’re not going to like what I’m about to type here for you, but just know that it’s a necessary kick in the ass and I’m in no way trying to flame you. As I mentioned in my last comment to you, you really need to read all of the links in my Year One collection.

I’m going to pick apart your latest report about this girl you ‘love’ and I think you should really give yourself some time to consider what you think has been your half-measure unplugging.

I sent her a text this morning that basically said I am going to fuck you in Italy. I love you, and this is what’s going down.We’ve had a number of conversations about sex before, about what didn’t happen in Odessa, etc. But I never pushed too hard. She says can we talk.

Two things here; first, you are using texting as a Buffer. This is what I would expect from a teenager or someone with an adolescent social skill set. Texting you ‘love’ her and convincing yourself you do after no more than a week of in-person interaction is a major, jumbotron-scale signal that you are not only Beta and Blue Pill, but also you subscribe to a scarcity mentality. This is rule one.

Secondly, you cannot negotiate genuine desire. You having conversations about how you’re going to fuck her in Italy are evidence that you really have no clue how Game works. Your pre-sex talks about having sex are again a major signal of your Blue Pill headspace:

Iron Rule of Tomassi #3

Any woman who makes you wait for sex, or by her actions implies she is making you wait for sex; the sex is NEVER worth the wait.

When a woman makes you wait for sex you are not her highest priority. Sexuality is spontaneous chemical reaction between two parties, not a process of negotiation. It’s sex first, then relationship, not the other way around. A woman who wants to fuck you will find a way to fuck you. She will fly across the country, crawl under barbwire, climb in through your second story bedroom window, fuck the shit out of you and wait patiently inside your closet if your wife comes home early from work – women who want to fuck will find a way to fuck. The girl who tells you she needs to be comfortable and wants a relationship first is the same girl who fucked the hot guy in the foam cannon party in Cancun on spring break just half an hour after meeting him.

Your conversations are all evidence that you buy into the ‘open communication’ Blue Pill narrative.

So I skype her. And we go round and round about this. I’m staying calm, even sweet. [Beta] But firm.[still thinking RP men will say that’s Alpha] The solipsism is off the charts – of course I’d seen this every time we argue, but eh, she’s a woman, what else is new?[attempt to confirm RP terms, and another plea for affirmation]

I just keep gently and firmly sticking to the topic, and she’s doing all she can to change it. Lashing out at me, saying I’m mentally ill, she thought I was different than other men, I’m trying to rape her, etc. Saying I’ve blown our relationship, she has all what I want, but I’m blowing it, good bye. On and on. Jesus Christ.

All this woman is doing is confirming your status as a Beta for her. Likely she thought you’d be an easy mark, but your overt insistence on preplanned, negotiated and scheduled sex has made her lose interest in you even as a Beta provider.

I’m now strongly suspecting bpd. These women are a fucking magnet for me. I did have interactions with very normal, genuine nice women over there – and tended to be religious – one very nice woman that I enjoyed talking to was very upfront from the beginning that she’s strong Catholic and will not have sex before marriage. I respect that completely.

This woman is not suffering from BPD, she’s responding how most women would when they have a man’s Beta status overtly confirmed for them. You believe these ‘types’ of women are drawn to you when in fact you have the same effect on every woman when you overtly demonstrate your lower value to them by sticking to your Beta Game while thinking it’s some how the correct, Red Pill way of dealing with women.

The only reason you believe you respect a Catholic woman is because you have no choice but to respect her because she reaffirms your Blue Pill nature, but still wont fuck you.

I’m going to invite the commenters to address Mitch’s situation in the comment thread, but I’ll start here by saying you really need to thoroughly read through my posts (or books if you prefer). You are in no way ‘woke’ to a Red Pill awareness Mitch. For as much as you believe you are, your behaviors, your mindset, all point to a guy who’s read some Red Pill ideas, but can’t disconnect from his Blue Pill hopes and attitudes.

You’re trying to force fit a Blue Pill hope into a Red Pill reality. This is why the last 3 women you’ve reported you’ve been involved with have been the same. It’s not them, it’s you.

Again, I didn’t write this post to flame you, but rather to let you serve as an example of how pervasive a Blue Pill mindset is, and how it retards a man’s social intelligence and his maturation.

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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Andy
Andy
5 years ago

HABD In your opinion, are pLTRs and legal marriage mutually exclusive? The conversation has kind of been assuming that, but I don’t really believe that it’s true. A married pLTR with a co-parenting agreement and a prenup might not be a bad deal for everyone involved. At least she knows that she’ll have no chance for full custody. No you can’t next her, but you can still punish bad behavior by spending less time with her, and there will be a higher level of dread since she knows you can just hit up another girl. You might need more comfort… Read more »

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

Recall that even if unmarried with kids gets screwed worse in family court if it goes to that, it may still be better to be unmarried with kids if that makes it easier to avoid going to family court in the first place (because hypergamy is better satisfied etc etc.). Hypothetical: if you go to family court with kids, you are screwed whether you are married or not. Maybe you are even 10 or 20% more screwed if you are unmarried? But imagine that being unmarried gives you a 30% bonus in not getting to that state in the first… Read more »

having a bad day
having a bad day
5 years ago

@Andy In your opinion, are pLTRs and legal marriage mutually exclusive? by current definition they are… lol… bc ‘pLTR’ = no legal contract… but the ‘concept’ is not… ” ‘non-monogamous’ legal contract marriage” is where that rabbit hole ended up as having the least downside risk/maximum potential for success for a man to raise his kid in a 2 parent family household in 2016… The conversation has kind of been assuming that, but I don’t really believe that it’s true. social conditioning is everywhere… lol… even in the ‘sphere… A married pLTR with a co-parenting agreement and a prenup might… Read more »

Blaximus
5 years ago

@ IAS ” @Blaximus: at this point I’m convinced I gave it a solid try over 1 year, so I’m mostly thinking of getting out. When I started I was mostly thinking of turning it around without wanting to get out, then I figured out I need to be ready to get out in order to have a chance of turning it around and focused on gaming the wife, but by now I’ve been thinking more about details separating assets than whatever else I can try to game my wife.” okay brother. I hear you. You sound like you’re tired,… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

“Men have the burden. That burden does not have to be a negative.”

Run toward the battle line…

Blaximus
5 years ago

@ HABD

that Star Trek clip was the best thing I’ve watched all day.

Thanks for posting that.

….I checked my ears and sadly, no points.

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

YaReally – to cut to the chase, just imagine SJF as a judge in anti-Family court. He already has utter contempt for anyone that can’t join his country club for a start, he doesn’t give a crap about 90% of other men anyway, so you know that working class and middle class married men will get the shaft just as a matter of course AND that he’d White Knight for any girly that even halfway looked or acted like his precious, his daughter because Daddy Goggles. Now image SJF hearing a child support case where Daddy’s Girl made a teensy… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

IAS
Recall that even if unmarried with kids gets screwed worse in family court if it goes to that, it may still be better to be unmarried with kids if that makes it easier to avoid going to family court in the first place (because hypergamy is better satisfied etc etc.).

But if you can keep hypergamy satisfied in an unmarried state then you have enough Game to keep hypergamy under control in the married state as well.

Right?

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Andy A married pLTR with a co-parenting agreement and a prenup might not be a bad deal for everyone involved. At least she knows that she’ll have no chance for full custody. I’m not Novaseeker, but I am certain he would / will tell you that no prenup agreement on child custody would be accepted by an anti-Farmily court judge unless it happened to line up with his / her / its own ideas. Child custody is determined by law and the court, prenups that don’t agree with the law or court get tossed in the trash. Prenups appear to… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

AR Bonus round: Vancouver, Canada has a fairly new law that simply states if a man and woman live together for some periods of time, they are to be considered married. End of story. Boom. I think it’s 2 years, but am not sure Yeah they will ignore this… same as when I pointed out several posts ago that the Australian law is going the same way… http://www.familyrelationships.gov.au/BrochuresandPublications/Pages/propertydivisionwhendefactorelationshipsbreakdown.aspx What do the new laws do? The new laws provide for de facto couples, when they separate, to obtain property settlements on the principles that apply under the Family Law Act 1975… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

And they also ignored – not a single comment – the laws on the books in many states such as NC that allow YOU as a husband to sue a guy who has an affair with your wife. I know a guy, a Dr. who got a seven figure judgment against his wife’s FB affair guy. He wont collect on it, but it is ruining the dude… Criminal Conversation and Alienation of Affection In North Carolina, innocent spouses have the option of pursuing a civil lawsuit against their spouse’s lover and alleging “criminal conversation” or “alienation of affection.” Through such… Read more »

Novaseeker
Novaseeker
5 years ago

’m not Novaseeker, but I am certain he would / will tell you that no prenup agreement on child custody would be accepted by an anti-Farmily court judge unless it happened to line up with his / her / its own ideas. Child custody is determined by law and the court, prenups that don’t agree with the law or court get tossed in the trash. Prenups appear to be most useful at protecting wealth. Not income, wealth. Yep. Pretty much anything about custody or child support in a pre-nup will be ignored, and the court will look at the “best… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Blaximus to Novaseeker Thank you for the clarification. I was being thrown by the use of the word ” court ” in (anti)Family Court. Was thinking about this earlier today. IANAL and I request Nova to correct anything I get wrong. Before about 1968 in the US divorce was a court issue, but since adultery was against the law if your wife cheated in theory you could drag her lover into court and sue for “alienation of affection”. ie. scamming wifey into breaking the marriage contract. Like suing a neighbor who tore down your fence or garden shed – point… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Bonus: I’ve tried talking to traditional, church going conservatives about divorce from time to time. All of them are totally bought into the “innocent women” model of divorce, where men over 50 dump the trustworthy wife of their youth to chase some younger, hotter model for no reason other than their own, selfish pleasure.

Dude, 70% of divorces are filed by women! “Well, that just shows how so many men are just no good now, to provoke women to do that”. Seriously. It’s that much of a bubble world for some men.

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Sentient Criminal Conversation and Alienation of Affection Wow, I thought all those laws got tossed out in the 80’s or 90’s. Guess they had to be kept around to have one more tool in the bag. Just In Case. Hm. Did you just trawl that up, or was that section of the law code something you already had looked at over the last few years or so? Just wondering. Total tangent: anal sex was illegal in most or all states until the 1970’s / 1980’s. So before “marital rape” I guess a furious harpy could have agreed to anal, then… Read more »

Blaximus
5 years ago

@ Rollo Fwiw… I got 1 out of the nest ( for a decade now ), one going in 2 years. If I were to consider any kind of relationship, I wouldn’t want a ” primary ” anything. Imo, the entire idea of being ” free ” eliminates being tied down in any manner to 1 woman, if I am understanding the pLTR concept correctly. I don’t see the point in that. When I was single, I was single, and I discouraged plates from forming any attachments. I certainly didn’t want any. So I have been struggling with the pLTR’s… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Novaseeker Only way to avoid that? Grab the kids and hop on a plane to a country without an extradition treaty and plan to remain there the rest of your life ( Flip side of that, just for men reading out there. The man I know who married an East Asian woman has made it clear he’s not signing for any passports, ever. His kids can apply for a passport when they are 18 if they want, that’s ok. Because in the course of his travails with attorneys and suppport groups and anti-Family court, he heard enough horror stories of… Read more »

Blaximus
5 years ago

Also, it’s been put forth that the pLTR is somehow a ” logical ” conclusion of being RP aware.

I can’t connect those dots either.

But I’m open to hearing it explained.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@kaminsky Good luck to you all but I must say that the most depressing manosphere phrase for me is; “gaming the wife” No one said that swallowing the red pill would be easy. On the brighter side, if you look at Game as something that is fun to do, maybe your depression would lift a tad. I’ve been gaming Mrs. Gamer…she was annoyed because I didn’t want to move the ottoman out from resting against the chair so that she could slide in…I had been resting my back against the ottoman as I sat on the floor watching a movie…lol,… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Rollo I’m officially an empty nester as of this year and I can tell you right now that were I to find myself single or widowed tomorrow I would never consider a pLTR nor marriage in my lifetime. Not to put you on the spot, but what do you think you’d lean towards in that situation? FWB’s, or something else? A friend of mine was in Thailand a few years back, upcountry out of Bangkok, and he reported meeting a few men who were retirees from Europe, England, etc. who lived off of pension checks and had some sort of… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

@IAS
I cosign Blaximus’s post to you. Maybe just me, but you do seem more stressed up than a year ago. Since there are no children, ask yourself what it is that you really want. Maybe just write stuff down on paper, “I want — ” whatever.

The woo-woo visualation stuff gets way out there way fast, but there is a germ of truth to “you can’t work towards a goal you’ve never thought of”.

MrT
MrT
5 years ago

@Rollo

By pLTR do you mean plate spinning (however you want) with one of the plates being pairbonded to you or her also living with you?

kfg
kfg
5 years ago
Novaseeker
Novaseeker
5 years ago

Was thinking about this earlier today. IANAL and I request Nova to correct anything I get wrong. A good and accurate summary. On courts of equity, they have existed before the family court system was created, but only in very limited circumstances. Most courts outside of family courts “sit in law and equity”, because most areas of the law have “equitable doctrines” which apply in hard cases to mitigate the harshness of applying legal rules woodenly in hard cases. And there were a small number of courts in the common law countries that were courts of equity, but the family… Read more »

CoNr
CoNr
5 years ago

Tfw esoteric term purple pillism has been hijacked by PUA’s

ah well Rollo you’re one of the best so I can forgive

YaReally
5 years ago

@Blaximus “Now it’s women making false accusations in court.” I only stress it now because I assumed guys here were aware that this is happening and the trend is increasing, based on either konwing divorced guys, reading their stories, or simple logic (a thing that benefits women with no consequence for them is a thing they’ll do more often). It only sounds like I’m bringing it up out of the blue now because I didn’t realize you guys thought men were walking into family court getting high-fives while their wives talked about how amazing they are as fathers and husbands… Read more »

YaReally
5 years ago

@IAS “Recall that even if unmarried with kids gets screwed worse in family court if it goes to that, it may still be better to be unmarried with kids if that makes it easier to avoid going to family court in the first place (because hypergamy is better satisfied etc etc.).” This. You get it. “Hypothetical: if you go to family court with kids, you are screwed whether you are married or not. Maybe you are even 10 or 20% more screwed if you are unmarried? But imagine that being unmarried gives you a 30% bonus in not getting to… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Oh… I see Yareally has typed ever more… words…

Please go back and read what we have written and understand it first perhaps…

Blaximus
5 years ago

Again, the assumption that married/monogamous/ltr makes it *harder* to keep attraction is false on it’s face for men that understand RP, or understand this naturally.

If one were to look to ” deadbedrooms ” and other type of sites where men specifically have major issues, you might get the wrong impression(s).

And it makes zero sense, to say to guys reading TRM in the first place, that men cannot keep attraction because they’ve legally married. As YaReally would say ” either RP works, or it doesn’t “.

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

@Sentient and Blaximus I agree that YaReally is rabid with false premises about the harder to keep attraction because of “married”. Game is Game. But children change PUA game. You want a gold star (parochial school reference for having performed well recently) for having had good PUA game and then raising children? No lasting merit there. The only reason for a LTR is that you actually find to girl the have supreme value. (How many fucking times do Rollo, Blax, Sentient and Me have to even say this?)More value as than any other women out there in your vision and… Read more »

Blaximus
5 years ago

False Child molestation/abuse accusation =

comment image

hank holiday
hank holiday
5 years ago

lol more productive marriage “discussions”

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

@Hank What is your point? If you use the “find” feature in your browser, the only one talking about marriage is YaReally. Marriage for him is a proxy for LTR. Unless you haven’t noticed the OMG’s are talking about game principles independent of marriage and not advocating that anyone else get married. We are married and aren’t going to apologize for it. So what if Game is harder for married guys. It is not the caricatured high hurdle for a red pill aware, game skilled guy. I am an enthusiast of LTR with unicorns and game being fungible across all… Read more »

having a bad day
having a bad day
5 years ago

@YaReally This was a false equivalency dishonestly put forth that makes the assumption that a baby daddy would be in child support arrears while a legal father would not. well, that was a cheap shot…lol… it’s not a ‘false equivalency’… and i have NEVER ‘dishonestly put forth’ anything… ever… my brain doesn’t work that way… and i don’t need ‘interweb points’ to validate my ego investments… and more importantly, i have too much respect for the men reading along on the other side of those computer screens trying to figure their shit out… i would have thought you had figured… Read more »

theasdgamer
5 years ago

Now @HABD is among the old guys out-of-touch keyboard jockeys who can’t ‘splain things to the young, omniscient PUAs. I’ve been contemplating how to explain to YaReally that you should read the old books for yourself and not just the Cliff Notes from PUAonDaWeb…listening to someone’s opinion about the old books is like listening to a keyboard jockey about Game. There’s a whole lot in the books that aren’t in the Cliff Notes just like there’s a lot you learn infield that isn’t part of Game Theory. And when it comes to Shakespeare’s plays, it’s also necessary to watch a… Read more »

Yollo Comanche
Yollo Comanche
5 years ago

Way to lay it down Iron Jock.

Blaximus
5 years ago

@ HABD In New Jersey ( I don’t know for sure about other states..) a man on Child Support is always ” in arrears ” because every year, the total amount owed is calculated and established. So if you pay 24,000 a year in CS, that total is what you always start the year at. You make ” monthly ” payments on the total, but your income tax refunds are taken too, because ” arrears “. Your credit reports will always show you as being ” behind ” in CS payments, even if yoy are current. The only way to… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

“Mitch” … venit, vidit, et fugit.

Culum Struan
Culum Struan
5 years ago

Re the latest posts in the marriage debate – I still haven’t had time to sit down and summarize anything, but just the most recent exchange, I understand it as follows – is this about right? YaReally is saying something along the lines of how the trend (not the current reality necessarily but heading that way) is that even being married doesn’t give you a significant advantage in a custody battle/child support scenario vs a baby daddy, because once accusations of domestic violence and child abuse are made, the husband gets dragged down to baby daddy level, so you lose… Read more »

Blaximus
5 years ago

@ Culum Either RP works, or it’s flawed and does not. The chants of ” it’s harder to maintain attraction ” don’t make a lot of sense to guys that have figured this shit out already, and most guys reading here at TRM should at a minimum grasp what kills attraction vs what keeps it alive and well. What I’d rather see is a plan that teaches guys how to maintain attraction with women regardless of the legal disposition of the relationship. So saying that a pLtr keeps dread going or whatever is actually a silly statement to married guys… Read more »

having a bad day
having a bad day
5 years ago

I do want to make one point so i’m not accused of ‘dishonestly putting forth’ bad info… the actual child support award would be based on some form of calculator, so probably not those actual numbers… likely less (unless the judge hates you for some reason…lol)… but the overall analysis is sound…

good luck!

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“Your credit reports will always show you as being ” behind ” in CS payments, even if yoy are current.”

And thus, even if you are current, you will be counted as a “deadbeat dad” in the statistics of the agenda.

Lowlife Alpha
5 years ago

All very true but all very banal. Not sure the sense in dissecting such low hanging fruit

Pwn
Pwn
5 years ago

Being eastern European makes me laugh whenever I read such things. Eastern European women simply are more duplicitous and better at female game. They’re the same vapid, materialistic sluts. They’re just easy and more feminine because they want to entrap western guys into shoveling more money into their asses than we, eastern Europeans do. Often they don’t even act this way towards us which makes us laugh our assessment off when they screw you guys over.

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[…] and what do I see in the comment feed from last week’s post? Our (our soon to be formerly) Purple Pill friend Mitch returning to give us all an update on what was supposed to be his inevitable married bliss. Rather […]

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CSI
CSI
4 years ago

Vetting a gf and vetting a ” wife ” are different skillsets. Some men ( most men evidently ) do not posses these skills, nor do they even know how to go about acquiring them.

If you mean you can learn how to judge whether or not a woman is going to get bored and divorce you, I don’t think that’s possible, at least not within an acceptable margin of error.

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