Before I launch in here today I need to confess that this post has been in my drafts folder for a while now. As most of my readers are aware I’ve known two personal friends who’ve taken their own lives as a result of having their Blue Pill conditioned beliefs set them on a path to self destruction. One of the more important parts of my charter when I started writing was to reach the men who were at their wits’ end in figuring out how to deal with their personal, romantic or married lives that had until then been directed by what their Blue Pill acculturation and their understanding of intersexual dynamics were molded to be. Since I started and stopped and then restarted this topic again there have been a few recent developments in my perspective on men taking their own lives as a result of the Blue Pill’s influence on them.
All of this really began about two months ago while I was engaging in a debate (or what passes for debate) on Twitter with a very unsympathetic woman who thought she’d set me straight about why it is men choose to take their own lives at a far greater rate than women. As it stands today, men are statistically between 4 and 5 times more likely than women to kill themselves. For most Red Pill aware men this is a fairly well known stat and one that gets quoted often enough when women trot out their own stats about abuse or whatever issue they think it is that MRA are ‘confused’ about. They usually get owned when this sort of back and forth goes down, but I’m always drawn to the comparative issues women think are equitable to that of men losing their lives.
Men’s disposability is also nothing new to the manosphere. Sperm is cheap, eggs are scarce and men are expected to sacrifice their lives for the security and betterment of women even in the most patriarchal of prior social orders. It’s always interesting to me that issues of mandatory male conscription into the military (potential death) and the unignorable high male suicide rates are something women still won’t accept as being a pretty raw deal for men. Women’s innate solipsism will still compel women to find some “yeah, but;…” rationalization for men’s disposability. Whenever I bring something like this up the reflexive presumption is that I’m bemoaning men’s victim status for being disposable. However, it’s impossible to discuss male disposability without such a connotation. My issues isn’t one of seeking some equitable disposability for women, but rather it’s drawing attention to the way women react and rationalize away their own part in that disposability.
True Powerlessness
I covered a lot of this in Chivalry vs. Altruism, so I won’t belabor that here, but I will point out the inherent power imbalance in this disposability. I’ve stated in the past that true power is not the control we can exert over the lives of others, but rather the extent to which we have control over the direction of our own lives. When we discuss issues of power between men and women the real, ultimate, loss of that control is in the context of our deaths.
There is no greater powerlessness for men than a lack of control over our own disposability.
Again, this isn’t some cry of victimhood for men – I happen to believe there’s an evolved component in the male psychological firmware that actually predisposes us to sacrificing ourselves in lieu of the security of our women and children. That’s not so much altruism as it is an inborn subroutine for protecting women that triggers in life-threatening situations. When a mass shooter opens fire indiscriminately at a crowd of people it is the men, not the women, who instinctively put their bodies between that gun and women or children, even the one’s they don’t personally know.
In the bigger scope of things, men will always be more disposable than women, and on some level of consciousness women’s hindbrains instinctively understand this. As such, women’s conscious process must find ways to reconcile this understanding in order for them to move on from men’s sacrifices. Sometimes this can manifest in the War Brides phenomenon, but I would argue that in today’s social learning environment of mass media, instant gratification of women’ solipsism and feminine-primary social order, this reconciliation takes some even uglier turns. Today, women have become very efficient in consoling each other’s solipsistic rationalizing of men’s sacrifices. In this environment of default female victimization and presumed oppression even men’s ultimate sacrifice, men’s ultimate powerlessness in their own deaths, cannot ever be consciously or unconsciously acknowledged in a state of fempowerment.
While I had this debate it occurred to me that even men’s suicides could never be attributed to anything less than their own ‘male egos’ by women, thus making them victims of their conditioning into “toxic” masculinity. Essentially, women were arguing that men would put a noose around their necks because they were socially conditioned to do so. Their suicide rate was attributable to their self-pity and inability to be ‘real men’ as some nebulous toxic masculinity had predefined for them. I thought this was kind of ironic when you compare this reasoning to the narrative shift away from ‘toxic’ masculinity to masculinity itself is toxic. This is really a stupid argument when you consider that it’s just another social convention used to absolve women of the guilt associated with men’s sacrifices. Men are hardwired for self sacrifice, but likewise women had need to evolved psychological adaptations to help them clear the red from their life’s ledger in this respect.
So, in the end, it helps if women can fall back on social conventions that put the associated guilt of men’s sacrifices back on the men themselves. Chivalry and traditional masculinity are fine when they serve the Feminine Imperative, but if a man actually gets killed or kills himself as part of that, well, that’s on him then. And this is what I was beginning with in this debate; there will always be a desire for absolution of women’s guilt or complicity in the deaths of men. I should also add that in terms of war and men being drafted women regularly default to the same asinine presumption that if women were running the world that there would be no wars. I won’t dignify that with any deeper analysis than to say that this too is one more (feeble) way of looking for absolution in the sacrifices men make to facilitate women’s reality.
Suicide Solution
That still left the question, why do men take their own lives in such alarmingly high numbers compared to women? I had to do a bit of research on this, but the demographics for male suicide today show some patterns. 7 in 10 suicides are men (majority white) between the ages of 45 and 65. As expected from gynocentric media, the primary reason always cited is men’s so called stubbornness in seeking out psychiatric help before they attempt suicide – again absolving women’s influence of any complicity – but ignoring what would motivate men, and this demographic in particular, to suicide. Again, there’s no attempt to understand the underlying reasons for male suicide, only a stereotypically easy ‘male-stupid’ answer to absolve women’s complicity in it.
There’s a lot to consider and be sensitive of when it comes to male suicide, but I’m going to speculate about a few reasons here coming from a Red Pill perspective. At no other time in western history has there ever been a generation of more purposeless men. From an evolved psychological perspective, men need a function. We are innate idealists. We look outward at the world and like to imagine what could be possible. I believe there is also an innate part of our evolved mental firmware that predisposes us to problem solving and improvisation, and much of that comes as an adaptation to women’s own innate need for men who can display cues of competency.
In Competency I made the case for women’s attraction to men displaying signals of competency, confidence, mastery and creative intelligence as a selected-for survival adaptation. In short, our competency in life, whether stemming from physical prowess, social dominance or creative intelligence is integrally linked with our reproductive success as well as overall life success.
However, at no other time in history has men’s competency been so devalued and so debased; other than perhaps in terms of physical prowess and accommodating the short term (Alpha Fucks) breeding imperatives of women. At no other time in (western) history has the equity in what a man can provide or create or solve been so implicitly unnecessary or superfluous to women. When we consider the rates of college enrollment and graduation of women compared to that of men, when we consider the practical problems that men used to solve, our utility has never been less needed – or at least that’s the zeitgeist of today.
We read about how men need to accept this new social reality – that our need for purpose and function is no longer needed or as valued – and we need to change our headspace about it as if it were something men might simply turn off. This is the result of equalist beliefs that anything gender-specific is something learned rather than the innate firmware we were born with. But we cannot simply change our minds about needing a function. We evolved to be problem solvers, women talk, men do, but now we are expected to accept that men are obsolete.
Loss of Utility
In Relational Equity I made a case for men investing too much of their egos into what intrinsic (and extrinsic) value they believe their respective women ought to appreciate about themselves. Under the old books, old social contract this equity may have had some conditional value to women, but as a buffer against Hypergamy today there is very little a man might consider value-added equity (unless it’s exceedingly rare or exceedingly valued) as a hedge against Hypergamy. Before any defeatist critics tell me how not all women are like that, yes, I get it, there are a lot of variables to consider here, but the equation and the reality doesn’t change – relational equity, overall, is no insurance against Hypergamy. It is also no insurance against women’s security and providership needs being met by resources that come from outside that relationship. I’m not considering this because I’m trying to depress any man, but it is vitally necessary to consider when we look at reasons why 45-65 year old men are predisposed to higher rates of suicide and higher rates of alcoholism and opioid abuse.
I would argue that a major contributing factor to high male suicide rates finds its origins in men’s need for purpose, function and accomplishment during this phase of life. Every day I read an article about how men my own age are dropping out of social discourse. I mentioned a Boston Globe article about just this phenomenon in Male Control. In some respects I can understand that despite the unprecedented connectivity we enjoy today men really don’t seek out bonds with other men. This is primarily due to the fact that men need a common purpose in order to form these bonds. Again, this is just how we’re wired. Women intentionally schedule time to simply interact with their same-sex friends just for the sake of communicating and enjoying the act of communicating. Men need function or a common purpose to come together. We need an activity or a problem to solve and then we communicate and form bonds.
Women talk, men do. This is a well studied fact; our brains and, by extension, social networks largely center on purpose and function. Now, lets presume that in spite of having literally all the information in the world at our finger tips we remove all need for the utility that men are wired to provide to not just women, but the larger scope of Society. We get a generation of men on the outside looking in. Only the most creative, resourceful and motivated of men can really utilize, much less master, all that this information has to offer him. And even a portion of those men can really see past the antipathy of their supposed obsolescence to do something truly meaningful or masterful. As the saying goes, most men live lives of quiet desperation, but in the modern era these men are demonstrably useless. And I mean that in a functional sense; once a Beta man has been wrung of his utility to women, he ceases to be able to convince his hindbrain that he can build, improvise or solve things.
Once a man is stripped of his usefulness, once it’s made clear that all of the equity he believed would support his relationship has been erased after so long, men will still resort to practical, deductive solutions. That solution may be suicide when weighed with the prospect of having to rebuild himself in a new context; and even if he did would he just be building a new ‘him’ based on his old belief set?
When my brother in-law committed suicide it seemed to me at the time to be the most logical end he would come to. He was a man very steeped in Blue Pill ideals, but he was also a man who prided himself on what he could do – and if he didn’t know how to do something he was always a fast learner. He literally built his life, and expectations of a future life, around the relational equity he believed defined him as a man. He was very invested in the old books, old social contract that rooted a man’s attractiveness and quality in what it was he could do. What he built for himself and his wife defined his identity.
All of that 20+ years of building equity and an identity based on it was erased for him in the space of about six months. But it was more than the 20 years he’d been saving, building, solving and refining, it was a perceived future he believed would be lived out for the rest of his life that got erased.
To me, at that time, his suicide made absolutely perfect sense from a male-deductive logic perspective. What didn’t make sense was all of the endless rationalizations I heard from his family, friends, his kids, his Ex (my now widowed sister in-law) about why they thought he went through with it when it was plain for anyone who wanted to confront the truth to see. A lot of these rationales were almost verbatim the same that the article I linked used. “If only men would reach out when they have suicidal thoughts”, any and every rationale that might absolve his Ex of the guilt, and still more that were meant to console her (he must’ve been mental ill) though in the end she really didn’t need it.
My brother in-law made a practical decision not an emotional one, and while I wouldn’t presume to say that a guy’s emotional state isn’t very influential in his suicide, how he comes to the decision is very much attributable to men’s deductive nature. He showed no outward signs of emotional distress. In fact, right up to his hanging himself he was in very good spirits and seemingly accepting of the fact that the wife he lived his life for was going to be leaving him soon. He was very matter of fact in a way that men are when they’ve resolved something for themselves. When a guy seems to be taking things in stride we don’t want to create a problem where we see none.
When we look in this context at the high rate of male suicide in this age demographic we begin to see how men come to this decision. Everything they’ve built up to 45-65 years of age is now debased, devalued or simply erased. All of the value and equity they’ve committed their lives to – doing the right thing according to their Blue Pill conditioning – is as if it never mattered. So they’re confronted with a choice, rebuild themselves (hopefully in a new Red Pill aware paradigm), reconstruct a new life and tough it out, or, simply, pragmatically erase themselves.
Personally, I’ve had at least two occasions where I’ve been confronted with rebuilding myself. It’s a tough prospect, make no mistake, especially when you’re Red Pill aware and understand the reality behind having to rebuild a life from scratch after so much investment in plans and projects you truly believed in when you made them. My father had to confront this rebuilding too at around 55 years of age, but rather than rebuild or kill himself I watched him slowly decay into a man I never knew could exist as my dad.
Zeroed Out
I apologize if this topic is a bit of a downer, but I think it ought to be part of any Red Pill aware man’s understanding that at many points in our lives we will be confronted with the prospects of having to rebuild ourselves. Failure, rejection and disappointment will happen for you, that’s just part of a man’s life, and it’s easy to rattle off platitudes about how many times you get back up being the measure of a man. But what I’m saying is there will be times when total reconstruction of your life will be a necessity.
You will be zeroed out at some point, and how you handle this is a much different situation than any temporary setback. This zeroing out is made all the more difficult when you confront the fact that what you believed to be so valuable, the equity you were told was what others would measure you by, was all part of your Blue Pill conditioning. At that point you need to understand that there is most definitely a hope for a better remake of yourself based on truths that were learned in the hardest way.
To end this I’m going to quote the comment of a man I met when I spoke at the 21 Convention in September. I won’t use his name, but after we talked he confessed that he was the commenter here. He’d made the trip to the convention to meet me face to face, to thank me for my work and gave me permission to use his example in a post. I won’t quote it entirely, but you can read the whole thing here. His situation is an example of, and inspiration for, everything I’ve illuminated in this essay
After a long marriage I divorced the mother of my children. A couple of years later, after some casual dating, I met a woman I would come to describe as my soulmate. I got married young – but this time, with all my infinite wisdom gained over the years – I was finally wise enough to pick a woman I was super compatible with.
We were together for a few years and even lived together. Things started out great and it was mostly smooth sailing until we moved in together – at which time I slowly allowed myself to be betaized in a slow motion, excruciating painful way.
About a month after breaking up with her I fully planned to commit suicide. I wrote a long letter explaining my rationalization and took other affirmative steps towards going through with it. About a week after I wrote the note – with D(eath) Day fast approaching – I took a break from getting my affairs in order to surf the net. I stumbled upon an Ask Reddit thread that was bad mouthing various subreddits. Some feminazi or male feminist mentioned the Red Pill subreddit as an example of a subreddit filled with craziness, and I decided to check what all of the fuss was about. Now
I’m not a religious man, but I will never rule out divine intervention. The timing of finding TRP – by complete coincidence no less – couldn’t have been more fortuitous. I stayed up all night reading the side bar – Rollo’s essays having the deepest effect on me – and everything…just…clicked….Talk about connecting the dots! Wow! It was very much like a come to Jesus moment. It was like divinity revealed secret knowledge to me just when I needed it the most – knowledge that gave me hope and very well may have saved my life. This all went down not really that long ago in actual time – but from where I metaphorically stand now it seems like an eternity.
Stay strong my friends, you can rebuild yourself even in the face of being zeroed out.
Self surgery and dealing with…
Staying in the present… This post hits close to home for me… The thing’s that brought me into the this community have been extreme moment’s of human experience without collaboration. Everything in life is a process or a spiral. Today i was thinking about the amount of time i have devoted in saving anything that was meant for its own transformation. In a lot of way’s that is what the process and purpose of this community is for me. It’s a way to re build yourself for yourself while enjoying your ability to be a human. The amazing thing’s that make me happy are not hard to come by. Mostly the ability to express anything about myself without being attacked with violence or sexual manipulation.
I am building this into reality. Challenge everything i ever viewed heard and experienced and remixing the pain and isolation into a chorus of laughter and gratitude.
About to rest and meant to continue this with more history and change… I hope everything from everyone is heard and exchanged into something beautiful.
If your not doing the family alpha’s December challenge i highly recommend it.
So, Rugby
This space is a collaboration.
“Everything is a process or a spiral”
Which is your reference experience and vague.
You’ve been here long enough to know what the order of business is.
What are are you’re sticking points and what can we help you to move on with the business of being a masculine male?
It seems that via your sport you have vicarious strength, courage, mastery and honor among men in the sport of Rugby.
What the hell are you doing in the realm of sport-fucking women?
Sorry to be so crude in the asking. But if I were your your uncle, I would do so much.
Leave your past behind. Pursue a new path forward. Don’t have any such thing as a Madonna/Whore mentality. That thin is a made up thing by the FI so you don’t get laid.
Get laid.
Stop living in the past. You’ve been in the manosphere long enough to let bygones be bygones. Your past is not prologue. It doesn’t matter. Don’t be stuck. Move on without apologies.
Your family is only a figment (a thing that someone believes to be real but that exists only in their imagination).
You guys, including Westray with the Madonna/Whore complexes. Please stop with that.
Every time a negative thought comes down in your mind. Stop it. Just stop it. And think what would Blaximus do at the check out line? And just go with the flow of that.
Stop being retarded in the flow of Red Pill and Game thought.
Just act on that. Don’t prethink. Move. Act. Do. Outward intention and Outward Action.
Choose among the fucking things that present themselves to you in life. Don’t fucking wait till you sit around and think yourself into a conundrum of non doing.
Choose. And act.
“I stayed up all night reading the side bar – Rollo’s essays having the deepest effect on me – and everything…just…clicked”
Rollo you are saving lives!
Can’t help but notice that the OMGs often sound as unicorny as the NAWALT crowd.
Yes, perhaps not ALL marriages are like that, yet, for all intents and purposes it seems NAMALT is quite similar to the cri de couer of NAWALT.
The bottom line seems to be one of Frame and all the other things here. One must enter knowing what is absolutely vital to prevent the natural betaization that so often comes with cohabitating, marriage, and children.
One must vet BOTH/ALL ways, you/her and the surrounding family/community systems.
And be vigilant.
I don’t get the art work ? Shouldn’t it be a dragon in the center of the sculpture instead of a bird ?
@Kieth
The canary in the coal mine is there to test the atmosphere, when it dies GTFO now. I was thinking this canary looks to healthy for todays climate, bad air.
I remember being a typical teenager where you go through the rewiring phase and the world makes no sense, and you hate your parents, and you feel trapped in a house with siblings and no privacy, and you don’t know what you want to do with your life, and your pimple-faced-self is down in the dumps. I remember being amazed at how while I felt I was a fighter with the “fight or die” mentality, I simultaneously had suicidal thoughts. I heard a random comment that helped me through it though – “You can’t fall off the floor.”
Feel like you’re at the bottom and can’t get any worse? Good, cause you can’t fall any further, but yet there you are still breathing.
Also, if you happen to see people die a violent death right in front of you, you feel a bit more thankful to be alive.
@SJF
The natural alpha experience is far different, he is less likely to project as he has always been the screen for others projecting. The runners high can become a great escape, the sense of peace is overwhelming and much welcomed. He will always be judged by his potential and manipulated by the games other weaker people have adopted to their own ends and agendas. It is one thing to have them build you up to your full potential, quite another to be constantly boxed into a safe, controllable space because weaker men and women feel threatened.
The constant battle of the natural is to free his mind from the constant outside pressures from every direction in today’s society. A good solid understanding of ” red pill” intersexual dynamics, the social dynamics of game and an understanding of his own proccess is essential.
The projecting that the natural alpha does, thinking others are as fearless and strong is detrimental to his well being in that he is unaware of the threat of the scared and weaker men and women present to his very lively hood.
When he fully realizes his position for what it is, and learns compassion for the scared little ones then he can realize his full potential.
@SJF
“Your past is not prologue”
Nicely phrased.
Of the, should be that the.
@boulderhead
Yes, we are each of us biased by our own experience. The naturals often struggle as coaches. Here they have all this mastery, yet work mightily to convey it. Or don’t bother and let others try to figure out how they did it.
Excellent advice being given here.
In the past I would have linked adulthood with sex, but now I think it has to do with realizing how utterly meaningless life is. Once that sinks in, Blax’ advice about adopting a radically self-centered MPO is no doubt the best bet.
Consumerism gets a bad rap but if you can abstain from maxing out your cards it is as good a motivation as anything else.
I was ultra greedy as a kid and very happy, now there is almost nothing I really would like to buy and far more miserable, so that’s that. I kinda envy those folks exited at the prospect of a new car or a new house…
*excited
@newlyaloof
I never went through that ‘teenage phase’ of rebellion and self-doubt, and I wonder if I should have. I have always had a great relationship with my parents and it is only now when approaching 30 that being at home feels a bit trapping (and it is mostly due to the difficulty in getting laid while living like that, otherwise I would be pretty happy). I am a single kid and that probably matters in this.
@ boulderhead I don’t think a man is a coal mine. It’s like they using a bird to depict life inside a man. Like it’s delicate or vulnerable. The resaon you put a bird in a cage is to keep it safe. I don’t know maybe Rollo try to say take care of your core self with this art. That maybe your mental health is just as important as physical health. It’s great timing on this the holiday season is hard on divorced fathers and lack of daylight and lethargy of cold winter can be depressing as hell. Movement is life. idleness and stagnation feed on themselves
@Markos
Take for instance a HS football coach, seeing a natural alpha, the alpha becomes his mark. The coach will approach, open, create comfort and close the deal. Coach has his agenda, building a winning team. The alpha is being played, he may enjoy the attention but he will have to give up his MPO for the team. This becomes a full time job.
Now alphas make great coaches, it takes years to grow through the experience of being coached into the position of coaching. A total paradigm shift.
The naturals friends growing up also recognize his potential, the coaching dynamics are similar.
@ Oscar
“Consumerism gets a bad rap but if you can abstain from maxing out your cards it is as good a motivation as anything else.”
There are much better options. Stuff, sex, knowledge are just that. They might be buffers for powerlessness elsewhere. It’s not you.
Blax said it clearly above. Watch your internal dialogue.
@Keith
It is Rollos artwork. The world is a stage and everyone is a critic, art is open to interpretation.
My interpretation is, using the canary in the coalmine analogy, the mans heart is the canary when it dies, if he doesn’t get moving into better space he will soon die.
Seeing the dead canary and staying at work in the coal mine is a form of suicide.
I am a single kid
I’m sorry for you. You missed out on a lot of life experiences with siblings which help with learning social lessons. You have a lot of work to do.
“You’re not an animal trapped by your past.” Me.
@rugby11: email is: odysseus_7737 at hotmail dot com
I know why the caged bird sings, ah me,
When his wing is bruised and his bosom sore,
When he beats his bars and would be free;
It is not a carol of joy or glee,
But a prayer that he sends from his heart’s deep core,
But a plea, that upward to Heaven he flings –
I know why the caged bird sings
— P. Dunbar
@asd
Seems so. A friend of mine jokes that all the single kids he knows are weird…
I didn’t want brothers or sisters when growing up though, that meant less goodies for me haha
SJB
Great P. Dunbar analogy.
“An allusion to caged canaries (birds) that miners would carry down into the mine tunnels with them. If dangerous gases such as carbon monoxide collected in the mine, the gases would kill the canary before killing the miners, thus providing a warning to exit the tunnels immediately.
English · Noun”
@ Oscar
I was wondering where you were. Good to see you.
You know, I never went through the rebellious period either. I used to ‘ hear ‘ about the age where teens start rebelling, but I’ve never noticed it to be very widespread among my peers.
What newly described is what I’d witnessed when a kid did start to become dissatisfied with living arrangements.
@ Markos
Good to see you as well.
Growing up, I loved playing football. I played from elementary school all the way through high school, and during the summers I played in the summer leagues.
In my junior year of highschool, our team had such a successful year that we got a spot in the regional playoffs. Unfortunately our first opponent was the 5 time regional champion highschool team. Physically and skills wise we seemed to match up well, so we had a very good shot at defeating them.
On game day in front of a capacity crowd, we were absolutely ready and the adrenaline was wafting through the air. I actually threw up twice because my stomach was doing back flips.
By the end of the first quarter, the score was 21-14 in our opponent’s favor. A one score game with 3 quarters left to play. To me, we looked strong and ready to work to win. Our opponents while respected highly, were just a bunch of dudes on the opposite side of the ball.
2nd quarter rolls around and our quarterback is getting sacked after each snap,mor he’s in the backfield running for his life. 3 downs and punt. At least our defense held the opponent to a field goa!. All we gotta do is adjust and execute.
On the sidelines the coach was… Let’s just say he was very animated and passionate. Lol.
But something was starting to become evident.
When coach demanded to know why our offensive linemen appeared to be getting totally run over, a few of our biggest and strongest guys stared explaining that the defense was just too strong, and they hit really hard and they hold and they face mask and they chop block knees and, and and……
Coach turned 3 different shades of red and sounds like his voice was being magically amplified –
” I don’t want to hear any of that shit!!!! I want you to stick to the fucking fundamentals and the goddamned basics and do your jobs!!!!! Remember basics?? Stay low and use leverage. Turn those motherfuckers and drop them on their backs!!!!”. But you could see on the linemen’s faces that they were tired and overwhelmed and defeated. Coaches words just bounced off their helmets.
Our opponents successfully got inside our lineman’s heads by playing dirty in such a way that the refs just couldn’t see. And they just couldn’t see the point of making adjustments and continuing to fight to hold ground. So our running game became non existent and the qb continued getting planted in the turf, and as a wide receiver I saw only 2 wildly overthrown passes the whole game, because the qb had to try and throw while being pursued by an unopposed wolf pack.
We never scored another point. We never got a first down. Most of our supporters in the stands were gone by the 3rd quarter. Shit was highly embarrassing.
To say that our battered qb was livid is an understatement. In the locker room he almost came to blows with a lineman. He shouted at him ” you forgot how to play football!! You kept standing up straight and the defence shoved your big dumb ass back into my fuxking lap every play!!!! I wanna know exactly why you didn’t do your fuxking job!!??!! “.
It got silent. Hell, I wanted to hear his answer.
He didn’t even raise his head when he said ” after a while, it just wasn’t worth it. It was pointless “.
As far as unicorny pronouncements go, my point is that one has to know what he’s doing and why, and execute. Defeatism is never an option. One thing is certain, if you set out to do anything in life and you can’t execute the basics consistently with confidence, you won’t ever really know what was actually possible.
But it’s almost guaranteed that you’ll lose. Eventually.
NAMALT? sure. I agree with that. Not at all the same thing as NAWALT.
SJB
I plagiarized this and changed the sex of the bird.
“White bird
In a golden cage
On a winter’s day
In the rain
White bird
In a golden cage
Alone
The leaves blow
Across the long, black road
To the darkened skies
In it’s rage
But the white bird
Just sits in his cage
Unknown
White bird must fly
Or he will die
White bird
Dreams of the aspen trees
With their dying leaves
Turning gold
But the white bird
Just sits in his cage
Growing old
White bird must fly
Or he will die
White bird must fly
Or he will die
The sunsets come
The sunsets go
The clouds roll by
And the earth turns old
And the young bird’s eyes
Do always glow
he must fly
he must fly
he must fly
White bird
In a golden cage
On a winter’s day
In the rain
White bird
In a golden cage
Alone
White bird must fly
Or he will die
White bird must fly
Or he will die
White bird must fly
Or he will die”
” . . . there is almost nothing I really would like to buy . . .”
There’s a word for that: “Wealth”
Man is not known as the tool acquirer, he is known as the tool maker. Man acquires and makes things in order to affect his environment to his advantage. Tools are power.
When there is nothing left to buy, it’s time to do something with what you have. The bumper sticker says, “he who dies with the most toys wins.” That is fundamentally wrong. The man who spends the most time playing with his toys wins. This is related tot he maxim: “Beware the man who only has one gun. He probably knows how to use it.”
Leverage your stuff to grow your power, i.e. your ability to live life freely, as you choose.
” . . .being at home feels a bit trapping (and it is mostly due to the difficulty in getting laid while living like that . . .”
There ya go. At 30 you are a mature man. It is time to escape those bonds and start being the one who does the trapping.
“I’m sorry for you. You missed out on a lot of life experiences with siblings which help with learning social lessons. You have a lot of work to do.”
@Boulderhead re: Whitebird
One of the hottest psychedelic rock lead “guitarists” was a violinist. These days he’s playing Hot Club gypsy jazz.
Blaximus
“It got silent. Hell, I wanted to hear his answer.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8o2B8khNomg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=500F-IWlBrY
@Blax
Was one coach more successful at instilling a Bantam mindset into his large players than the other?
We will transport and place 32.000 lbs of material rod it flat, float the aggregate down, cut the bumps (much like body filler on a large scale) then when the consistency is right trowel it smooth until it becomes a shape set in stone. The process starts out hard and heavy,with a need for martial skill and accuracy, then as the material hardens the work intensifies untill it becomes stone. At this point if the product is not satisfactory it will need to be ground with diamonds to spec and or filled with stronger material.
Wednesday.
@ rugby
Enjoyed the rugby clips. If I was 30 years younger, I might. Lol.
It’d be cool if America had a real professional rugby league.
A couple of posts regarding menopause and sexual retirement:
https://therationalmale.com/2017/02/08/sexual-retirement/
https://therationalmale.com/2014/12/01/the-fog-of-menopause/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34rhLCxejFQ
“It’d be cool if America had a real professional rugby league.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXYbT4Ov2pY
@ boulderhead
Our coach was a stickler for the fundamentals. This made everyone on the team better as a unit operating in unison. We were pretty bad ass for a time under his tutelage.
It’s obvious that the other coach taught ” tricks ” more than actually being good at balling.
Yet, our coach also emphasized making split second adjustments according to what’s going on in real time.
I was bitching about all of the pass interference I was getting 30 yards down field. The corner was actually grabbing me by the throat at points. Coaches response was to stay focused and grab his fucking throat back.
That day the other coach was better, only in the sense that our key guys didn’t adapt or stick to the fundamentals. They just became angry and frustrated and checked out.
That lesson will stay with me until death.
“That lesson will stay with me until death.”
It isn’t over until it is set in stone.
@kfg
“Hot Club gypsy jazz.” To acculturated for my taste.
From your menopause post, Rollo, “survival-side evolution essentially gives up on women once they reach a point where they are no longer reproductively viable.”
How does that square with the fact that women tend to outlive men?
You refer to Dawkins’ The Selfish Gene in that post. Biologists generally have dissed The Selfish Gene as being too narrowly focused. Cooperative evolution wouldn’t exist if Dawkins’ theory were correct, since cooperative evolution aids survival/reproduction of the local gene pool (and perhaps even the gene pool of another species).
“Yet, our coach also emphasized making split second adjustments according to what’s going on in real time.”
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLVxlWZtF4t3sODpJjNKw2Ad3OKPHVHd3M
Learning to ref rugby got me out of a lot of dark places.
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLVxlWZtF4t3srzJMR_mGxoIb4yMzzLsLK
https://thecoachessite.com/2016/01/13/mindset-nhl-top-scorer-ice-hockey/
“We were at AA Provincials (yes, AA) in Bantam. This player had always been dominant, even though he was small at the time. I loved watching him play and playing with him. But one play stands out above all the others. I will tell you why…
This play was originally a mystery to me. But I’ve come to see how this play defined his mindset. And I believe that his mindset led him to where he is today: on top of the NHL.
If you’re a coach, then you’re probably interested in this particular mindset because you want to know how to replicate it with your players. So let me tell you the story now.
Back to the Bantam Provincials, in a semi-final game, he got the puck in the corner and then walked up the half wall. He then tried an ambitious move around a defender. He lost the puck. On the same shift, shortly after losing the puck, he recovered the puck in the corner and then walked up the half wall in the exact same way. The defender defended him in the exact same way. I could hear myself mouthing the words “don’t make the same mistake twice – dump it!”…BUT, lo and behold, this player tried the exact same move in the exact same scenario. This time he BEAT that defender. Then walked in and scored the game tying goal. We went on to win the game.
WOAH.
How interesting is that? This player did what no coach would ever tell him to do – TRY IT AGAIN.
He made a mistake, but he had such a strong belief in himself that he could make the play, that he did it again. It worked. And he scored. Note that he didn’t shy away from the situation by choosing a lower risk play.”
This is what I mean by instilling a bantam mindset, a big guy that plays like a small guy.
“any of various small, domestic fowls. a small but aggressive person. 3. like a bantam; small and aggressive. Word origin of ‘bantam'”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zj6YFZv_Yts
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RU4p9V_TjK0
HRT isn’t necessary for an old lady to want sex. All that is necessary is that she be put on an emotional roller coaster, just like a young broad. We see this in the field all the time. Lots of data points to support this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3OGtxSLHGI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCuGJlkJOcM
@ASD
Pre menopausal estrogen cardio-protection.
From NCBI
“Premenopausal women have a lower risk and incidence of hypertension and cardiovascular disease (CVD) compared to age-matched men and this sex advantage for women gradually disappears after menopause, suggesting that sexual hormones play a cardioprotective role in women. However, randomized prospective primary or secondary prevention trials failed to confirm that hormone replacement therapy (HRT) affords cardioprotection. This review highlights the factors that may contribute to this divergent outcome and could reveal why young or premenopausal women are protected from CVD and yet postmenopausal women do not benefit from HRT.”
The health care industry is tailored to female conviemce.
Include the increased environmental dangers of younger men on the job, risk taking lifestyles.
Local rugby teams are popular round here. My nephew just broke his tibia recently.
Risk takers, heart breakers.
EhIntellect
“Risk takers, heart breakers.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EANghktzdMg
“My nephew just broke his tibia recently.” How is hes recovery?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cs85vvd2f0c
When what has worked in the past no longer works in the present.
@ EH
Man, they look like they’re having the time of their lives.
Btw, I broke my leg taking out the trash once. It’s not as swell a story as ” I broke my leg scoring the winning point “. My story is ” well, there was ice on the stairs… “.
Even after accounting for risk-taking lifestyles, women tend to outlive men. You see a lot more widows than widowers.
Also, cycle-induced hormonal variation cannot account for what we see in the field regarding women’s arousal (where they are emotionally “lit up”) in bars. Sure, cyclical variation in hormones can account for women’s interest in mating with a LTR beta. That doesn’t cover women’s desire to mate with alphas, tho.
Over the past century, men have taken much of the risk out of women’s lives.
Blax broke my thumb sledding down this on a banana peal at 13, wiped out and caught it in the cog. I would do it again.
https://youtu.be/WJpoCmp_pvI
Reading this post reminds me of a man in my neighborhood who killed himeslf with a pistol while his wife and two daughters were at church. The story goes that they came home and found his body under a blanket inside the garage. He had covered himself lying on the garage floor and shot himself. Although I have not ruled out the possibility that she may have murdered him for the life insurance money because he was scheduled to be terminated from his job due to layoffs during the Great Recession, there is a darker side to his death. It could be possible that she shot him with with his gun while wearing gloves so only his finger prints would be on the weapon. Of course, she would have had to get him positioned on the garage floor first. All of this is very dark, however, as I stated, there is a darker side to his death and it is especially insidious. The direct cause of his death does not matter now. What matters is that his death was a very unnecessary tragedy.
This guy was an attractive athletic male, tall, muscled, well groomed, and good looking. He was the kind of guy everyone assumes is living the good life. He was like that “all American” successful guy our culture has long promoted, good looks, pretty blond wife (bleached), “good job”, upper middle class, “great neighborhood”, etc, etc. They have two beautiful daughters (physically), both teenagers at the time, pretty white American cheerleader types. His wife was of the same social click. They owned (she still does) a “MacMansion” in our neighbor that was built a couple years before his death (she spent a lot of money remodeling and redecorating it immediately after his death and said “it is what he would have always wanted”).
Here is the insidious dark side. She (now in her late forties, early fifties) still refers to him as “her” Prince Charming. She has a cheap ass gaudy asstard glittery Cinderella stage coach effigy perched on the edge of her master bath tub. The house is decorated with lots of crappy faux very “traditional” looking accents and what not. The base of the gold painted stage coach crap is inscribed with the words “ “If you keep on believing, the dreams that you wish will all come true” – Cinderella”.
Of course Cinderella consideres herself worthy of a royal lifestyle. No! Entitled to a royal lifestyle! In fact her self assigned entitlement is the core of her existence, regardless of her feigned artfully orchestrated fakery of empathy and ostensible high moral mindedness (she’s just another pedistialized puritanical bleeding cunt). HER Prince Charming is the tool she expects to provide her with all the comforts and indulgences she whimsicaly, No! MAGICALLY imagines. It is all SUPPOSED to happen with the words “bibbidy bobboddy boo” spoken by Cinderella’s fat fuck blubbery obese fairy godmother war pig (Walt Disney drew it, not me, to simulate the real fat asstard blubbery slob fucks, so as to seem plausible to the mass of imbeciles). So while blubber pig is babbling and Cinderella is magically dreaming and wishing, Prince Charming is working himself insane to try to keep the shit coming down the pipe. And of course to maintain her status of royalty Cinderella must acquire more and more expensive royal comforts and indulgences than her ugly stepsisters, lest she experience the dread of seeing herself as being too close to being equal with them. And so, on and on it goes as she compulsively consumes more and more in this “magical” upward spiral into ever higher strata in the magic kingdom. But OH NO! Reality is a bitch and a bigger bitch than even “Barbie” (who has “everything”…a term which more than implies infinity). There is a limit to this insane attempt to make magic real and the imaginary upward spiral is in reality a dowanward spiral. Resources are limited. The only thing unlimited is Cinderella’s insatiable appetite for all things royal. Just like “Barbie”, she is insatiable, unsustainable and eventually the debt has to be paid, the grim reaper comes to call. All debts must be paid by someone. But wait! There’s is hope for poor little “Rellay” Prince Charming is there to once again “save the day” and keep “Rellay” in royalty. This time it’s in death. He sacrifices himself. After all doesn’t Rollo,say it is “innate”, and established by the universe? Prince Charming is conscripted by his own chromosomes as Rollo more than implies. If not, his chromosomes are “defective” or aren’t “normal”; he wasn’t innately constituted as males are “supposed to be”.
The poor bastard was dead before he died. He was murdered before he was killed or killed himself. The man was murdered long before he stopped breathing and “Prince Charming” was put in his body before he ever had a chance to live.
Do you want to live or not?!
Your life, or as a tool in someone’s else’s?
EhIntellect
Pre menopausal estrogen cardio-protection.
No evidence to support that. More likely it’s the iron, both circulating and as ferritin. Ironic (heh) to contemplate that the 18th century custom of bleeding men actually had some validity.
Every man and every post-menopausal woman should have iron and ferritin checked, corrective measures taken as appropriate.
kfg
Over the past century, men have taken much of the risk out of women’s lives.
Yes, in a multitude of ways.
Childbirth in particular. Better medical hygene (eventually) and medical baby-forceps both in the 19th century reduced deaths in childbirth for women. Sulfa drugs and then antibiotics in the 20th century reduced the risks of giving birth even more.
Historically women had shorter lives than men, it is not uncommon to find geneologies where men in the 19th century and earlier had 2 or even 3 wives in succession due to childbirth in particular or other premature demise.
Given the nmber of men who die of the side effects of hypertension, it is arguable that modern western women kill their husbands on the installment plan – one nagging day at a time.
Despair is a real killer. I just finished reading a book about the only successful multi-prisoner escape from a WW II Japanese prison camp. Men died in Cabanantuan and other POW camps in the Phillippines from despair – just laid down and didn’t get back up. Their mental dialog spiraled down and nobody could bring them back up.
boulderhead
Thank you for that timelapse…
NBTM
“The poor bastard was dead before he died. He was murdered before he was killed or killed himself. The man was murdered long before he stopped breathing and “Prince Charming” was put in his body before he ever had a chance to live.
Do you want to live or not?!
Your life, or as a tool in someone’s else’s?”
Your own life your own ownership though’s words and deeds.
@NBTM
I would rule out murder, excepting character assassination maybe.
“they came home and found his body under a blanket inside the garage. He had covered himself lying on the garage floor”
A very considerate man in my estimation, easy clean up on the concrete floor and under a blanket to hide the gory details from his loved ones that he had already”failed” in his minds eye.
Anonymous Reader
What was the name of the book?
http://histclo.com/essay/war/ww2/pow/pow-cou.html
http://www.shaggytexas.com/board/showthread.php/125951-WWII-POW-survival-rates
“Given the nmber of men who die of the side effects of hypertension, it is arguable that modern western women kill their husbands on the installment plan – one nagging day at a time.”
Hence the joke:
Q: Why do men die before their wives?
A: Because they want to.
He’s o.k.
He could use some RP. Not ready though.
Good with the women, AMOG….but he’s completely whipped by my sister. Serves her, not himself, limits his desires, replaces them with hers. He wants to move to Idaho, but she convinced him to stay, gives him shelter, food, cuz he’s low on cash, low on confidence.
Not with women, personally. KFG wrote way back about this phenomenon. A generation of guys, selectively Alpha. Incongruent. See women as fuck toys, doting to other women. It’s as if they believe the FI conventions, but only for certain women. NAWALT ideas.
Hadn’t talked in a long while. His step dad died in Spring, nephew liked him and was upset, hatred for his once drug addled Dad. I was the only guy around so took him out to celebrate his stepdad’s life. Back at his place he had an emotional dump. Years of pent up hatred, anger. You know, the rage filled crying, smashing shit, bloody knuckles. He wound himself up wanting to fight me. I told him, “Well, o.k. if it’ll help you move on.”
It didn’t last as I was sober, he wasn’t. I put him to bed after.
A week later My sister sent me pics of bloody concrete, the stuff he smashed and won’t talk to me. Meh. No loss. AWALT.
I was glad I was there for him. We all need a mentor. I should touch base.
“No evidence to support that.”
I’m not debating the reams of correlational evidence contrary. I don’t care if it’s true or not, just to be clear. Feel free arguing both sides. Again IDC.
Flat dismissals with facile solutions is flat earthy.
EhIntellect
When Thomas died…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YDyAoBm4cs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGv7wSmJ7K0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFK5x-M0YCg
The person who told me showed me these video’s… Was calm and happy alway’s cared and was grateful to see Thomas being Happy… Had many discussions about music and creation…
Punched a concrete wall after i found out… The wall won… Anger was still present… I was weak and powerless again…
I forget the dates to stop myself from falling back into that darkness that’s waiting… Knowing it’s ability’s… Thomas was the one person from the 5 last year who i grew up with for the most part of my life… We both had issue’s with are mother’s and we both spoke about everything that i observed as the red pill. But we didn’t call it that… I took him to Utah with me since he enjoyed exploring the country and world. Messed up an getting him back home and it became a Joke at the skate park that would eventually get me called “Billlllyyyyy”…. Billy is a co friend of mine who grew up with Thomas as well…. Going out to sort this out being behind a computer machine isn’t as effective as marching into the sunlight…
Jordan Peterson on Nietzsche on Blaximus on ideology:
Of course Blax is absolutely right the key is not to fear women. But that is the end.
First I think the lack of purpose is an important topic which should be raised more often in todays debates. In our modern view the task of finding purpose in life is all up to the individual. And that’s kind of inevitable since it’s just the other side of the coin “freedom”. But still that task may be too hard for the individual.
But as reason for the suicides that explanation falls somewhat short in my opinion. Rebuilding yourself is actually a good purpose and nothing to fear. I think what’s really shattering these men (and I was at that point 15 years ago too) is something Jordan Peterson describes at several points in his videos: What really brings people down is the encounter with “evil”, which he defines as malicious intend directed towards you. It’s one thing if you suffer because someone is reckless in pursuing his goals, but a very different thing when your suffering is not just means to an end but the goal itself.
Now from the perspective of men (especially without RP understanding) “advanced betaisation” is just that. It doesn’t make sense for the women to ruin that relationship. She will not do any better now at 37, not to mention the children. But her instincts still tell her to test that man until he breaks. And then punish him even more for breaking. That’s evil. Women are actually evil.
And now back to Brax: The evil is there, looking away doesn’t make it go away. You can run an hide or you can learn how to fight it. But then you have to lose the fear and game it instead.
“Women are actually evil.”
And I thought I was dramatic.
EhIntellect
“No evidence to support that.”
I’m not debating the reams of correlational evidence contrary.
Ok. If you want more fun, search on “Replication crisis” and “medical”. In a few more years the medicos will finally be force to admit that cholesterol may be a symptom but it’s not a cause of CHD. In the mean time more men will develop diabetes (which associates with heart disease), many of them by following the Official Heart Healthy Diet consisting largely of lots and lots of simple carbs.
I don’t care if it’s true or not, just to be clear. Feel free arguing both sides. Again IDC.
If YDC then why bring it up?
Flat dismissals with facile solutions is flat earthy.
I flatly dismiss the flat earth because the planet is a spheroid. Is this facile?
In the mean time, get your iron checked. Bacteria need iron to reproduce. So do cancern cells. Don’t hand those things free fuel.
@boulderhead: very good re-write.
rugby11
What was the name of the book?
“Escape from Davao” by John D. Lukacs.
@Ih
Good point. The cart before the horse.
https://therationalmale.com/2013/11/13/empathy/
Did he lose his sense of purpose, before she started to test him into oblivion?
Because women lack empathy for any but their spawn does this make them evil?
She can be trained to support her man into alpha, pick him up dust him off and send him back into the fray. This is not in her nature.
lh
What really brings people down is the encounter with “evil”, which he defines as malicious intend directed towards you.
That’s confusing cruelty with evil. Casual meanness is easy, cruelty requires more work and evil is something else again. I’ve known multiple women with a mean streak, a few that were capable of cruelty and maybe one or two borderline evil cases.
Once you’re out of grade school, letting a mean girl get under your skin is weak. But a lot of men now are weak in various ways.
Don’t forget, men are the true romantics. Suicide as a grand, “you’ll miss me when I’m gone”, “Look what you made me do!”, “Behold my noble and mighty self sacrifice”, romantic gesture is … stupid. It’s a stupid thing to do for many reasons. Because the girls aren’t really going to be affected by it – War Brides, remember.
“In the mean time, get your iron checked. Bacteria need iron to reproduce. So do cancern cells. Don’t hand those things free fuel.”
Wow this gives new meaning to the term “Geritol crew”.
Another loss, the pressure men face:
https://nypost.com/2017/12/03/golden-krust-ceo-killed-himself-over-tax-debt-fears-of-probe/
“Hawthorne employed dozens of relatives at the business he started in 1989, and the source said he left a note in which he apologized to his family.”
Thinking of others.
What stopped me from eating the shotgun was, what kind of example am I setting for my boys?
Boulderhead,
That line got me too.
He was alone, surrounded by family.
“He was alone, surrounded by family.”
“Hawthorne was slapped with a proposed class-action suit alleging he cheated as many as 100-plus workers at the Golden Crust plant out of overtime pay”
maybe it was his family brought the lawsuit lol
“The suit — fairly common in the food service industry — remains pending in Manhattan federal court.”
Government wants its cut.
Great post, Rollo. Being zeroed out is hard particularly if you are in your 40s, 50s, or 60s. This essay puts it all in perspective and it has an answer. It’s the answer that people like you and Jordan Peterson have found. We get to set the frame for subsequent generations.
https://www.ribbonfarm.com/2016/04/28/immortality-begins-at-forty/
kfg
Hence the joke:
A few years back I went digging for the original Framingham heart study and found parts of it. It was a real wide net to try to figure out what factors were driving the increase in heart attacks, back when a lot of men were dying of those in their 40’s. It was big data for the 1950’s.
There was a table of factors that were teased out of the data, not just obvious life habits such as smoking, exercising, but other issues. High cholesterol was one of them. The table looked something like this:
FACTOR RISK INCREASE
High Chol. 0.45
There was another factor in the table that caught my eye:
MARRIED TO WOMAN WITH COLLEGE DEGREE
and the increase risk of a heart attack was virtually the same as cholesteroal to 2 decimal places, (picking number ouf of the air) “4.51” vs. “4.49”. Yet nobody ever bothered to try to explain that in the text as far as I could tell, and it’s forgotten in any discussion of heart disease today.
Because they want to
“Better a tent on a roof than to share a good house with a contentious woman”.
Frame. It’s what’s for breakfast, lunch, dinner and midnight snack. Every day.
@ Blaxumus
Speaking of high school sports, I told this story in Field Reports back this last January:
We had an epic varsity wrestling meet against our prime rival back in 1979. Two premier all boys Catholic schools. The Jesuits against the Franciscans. It went back and forth and we lost by a few points. Our team members grumbled in the locker room afterwards about how we got screwed by the referee’s on a few points and should have won. Our coach taught us and epic lesson on that. I believe he swore a bit as he spit out that: “The referees didn’t screw anyone. You guys didn’t wrestle well enough to overcome those few points decided by the referees. Next time, be so good that those points out of your hands don’t matter.”
Randomly, I was clinking on the manosphere.com link on Rollo’s sidebar:
https://strengthbysonny.com/2017/12/04/99-words-for-living-a-successful-life/
(I don’t think the blogger names who he attributes the following to.)
99 Words For Living a Successful Life:
Great post, Rollo. Much appreciated.
From your Kill the Beta:https://therationalmale.com/2011/11/21/kill-the-beta-2/
“You can pore through all of the advice and sift out the wisdom from this blog and the community at large, but none of it will amount to anything for you if you wont act. I can’t begin to recall all of the times I’ve counseled young guys, giving them all manner of advice and encouraging them to put it into practice, only to have them constantly bemoan that they can’t find the motivation.
More often than not it takes some traumatic experience or they have to be reduced to having nothing left to lose before they’ll really have the fire lit under their asses to become more than they are.
I don’t consider myself a motivational speaker, but at some point you have to cross the abyss and change your mind about yourself.”
You changed my mind.
I’m still here.
Thank you.
https://d3p157427w54jq.cloudfront.net/uploads/2015/06/it-gets-better.jpg
@ Rand HOoks:
When I open myself up to dating, commitment and possibly marriage I am opening the door to be zeroed out? Is that a harsher way of saying life is always changing and if I’m in a relationship this is something I need to be prepared for?
Yes, that’s exactly what we’re saying.
With respect to women, especially, you must be prepared for her to walk out of your life at any time. You must be prepared to lose half of what you own, and that woman. You must be prepared to start over any time, all the time.
“Men’s disposability is also nothing new to the manosphere.” – A man’s “disposability” is directly attributable to how disposable he allows himself to be. If he allows his disposability to be defined and determined by anything other than himself, then what can he expect, what will the universe deal such a man, what fate does he guarantee himself, what fate does he deserve?
“Loss of Utility” WTF?? – “Utility”…Utility to whom? “I cannot determine my own destiny. Oh no, I’m no longer “useful”, so I’m just going to kill myself. I know nothing but slavery, it is my rightful place in the universe. But now I have no utility so I’m going to sacrifice myself on the altar of martyrdom and Stockholm syndrome (a primarily feminine phenomena). I am the slaves slave. The feminine and our gynocentric culture has no more use for me and it defined who I am and what value I attribute to myself, so now I am worthless to myself.”
I DEFINE MY OWN UTILITY, THANK YOU VERY MUCH! And I suggest that you do the same.
“As the saying goes, most men live lives of quiet desperation, but in the modern era these men are demonstrably useless.” – To whom? Who defines their “usefulness” or lack thereof. What slave master is culling these men? Which men are willing participants of this perverse definition of their own identity assignment? Are you one?
“Once a man is stripped of his usefulness, once it’s made clear that all of the equity he believed would support his relationship has been erased after so long, men will still resort to practical, deductive solutions. That solution may be suicide when weighed with the prospect of having to rebuild himself in a new context;” (such a man never built himself to begin with) “and even if he did would he just be building a new ‘him’ based on his old belief set?” – What kind of man allows another, be it a woman or other men or the “culture”, to “strip him of his usefulness”? Tell me what kind of “man” is this? What kind of “man” resorts to this reassignment of blame to rationalize his own lack of gumption? What kind of “man” allows women to run roughshod over him in this way? Why do some men such a Hugh Hefner capitalize on women while others find it impossible? Was Hefner less of a “real man” because he used women in ways others couldn’t find possible? Was he “evil”? were all men in history who acquired many concubines “evil”? Who makes these fucking rules?
What kind of man considers himself to be “equal” to a woman or is afraid of someone saying all men are “equal” to all women? Only an insane idiot would fall for that crap! You see, the truth is, we are not “equal”, never have been and never will be. All men ARE NOT equal. Men and women ARE NOT “equal”. IT IS A LIE! The western world has futilely masturbated its psyche for a few hundred years on this lie and all that has cum of it, is incessant bickering, battling and fighting over who controls the definition of it…..who is more “equal” than who. It’s all bullshit.
“When my brother in-law committed suicide, it seemed to me at the time to be the most logical end he would come to.” – And I think you are still throwing up the cool aid. I don’t care how many tears were shed, how confused anyone was or still is, how many times or how much someone masturbated themselves sexually or psychologically. No number of tears, no amount of rationalizing, no amount of sexual or mental masturbation will change the universal fact that if you do not accept responsibility for yourself, no one will, because you are the one and only who can.
I was for a moment tempted to think this suicide thing is mostly a western (white) male thing but the more I read the more I realize it is just a man thing and not a white male thing.
A couple of years back I was on a date with this very attractive Ukrainian women that I met online. She told me that her former husband, a doctor, shot himself in the chest and killed himself. She told me this in the context of her struggles and one of the reasons why she moved out west from the east coast. She was trying to elicit sympathy from me. She even showed me pictures of the pearl handled, nickel plated 357 and asked me if I was on the market for a gun. At that point all I could think of was, HOLY FUCK! That poor bastard. I immediately thought of Rollo, the red pill and female solipism. Needless to say, thanks to Rollo, I was not swayed.
I went out with her one more time to try to get in her pants. To no avail. It became apparent that she was looking for provisioning. So I moved on. Yes, online dating is nowheresville. Hah
Thank you Rollo for such a heart felt essay. Your writing is foundation for my continued RP awareness.
@cheupez
https://fthmb.tqn.com/fxA9djtLzZA1vaXazVf6HSqbtpM=/768×0/filters:no_upscale()/SeppukuKabuki1885HultonGetty-2000×1509–56a0429d5f9b58eba4af92ab.jpg
Speaking of Ukrainians….
O/T fluff – was in the supermarket last night at midnight ( closing time, zfg ) cornering the market on Bacon.
In checkout ahead of me was a 6 foot tall blonde, in flats. She was young, and on her phone ( surprise ) and she was speaking what sounded Russian, having worked with Russian strippers in the past, but I was clueless as to what her conversation was about.
She was all alone.
There are solo many chicks floating around here at all hours alone.
She even showed me pictures of the pearl handled, nickel plated 357 and asked me if I was on the market for a gun.
“Only a pimp from a cheap New Orleans whorehouse would carry a pearl-handled pistol.”
Attributed to George S. Patton
“Only a pimp from a cheap New Orleans whorehouse would carry a pearl-handled pistol.”
Attributed to George S. Patton
I was thinking wtf? about that too. Also a doctor shooting himself in the chest to commit suicide? That’s just stupid or ignorant of him. Any doctor knows the brain-stem is the target. (But don’t tell anyone about that.)
That doctor was what you call a drama queen. The fact that she was attracted to him at one time would put her abilities of judgment in question. There are reasons to vett.
Non sequitur:
First US transplanted uterus produces baby:
http://www.cnn.com/2017/12/04/health/uterus-transplant-us-baby-birth/index.html
Next up: female bitchface obsolescence with transplanted uterus into sexbot.
“In checkout ahead of me was a 6 foot tall blonde, in flats. She was young, and on her phone ( surprise ) and she was speaking what sounded Russian, having worked with Russian strippers in the past, but I was clueless as to what her conversation was about.
She was all alone.”
Max insta dating + closing a blonde Russian girl that speaks zero English:
Oh, and a .357 is a revolver, not a pistol. I didn’t know it was possible, or even fathomable to put a pearl dress up on a .357. What would be the purpose other than sub-communicating something. Handguns are functional and should be kept that way. They are not a brandishing thing.
I’d run in the other direction from that Ukrainian.
“The doctor was what you call a drama queen.”
The doctor was what you call a “Sales Pitch.”
“The doctor was what you call a “Sales Pitch.””
And he won that sales pitch (heh, we won over the Ukrainian). Up until the point where he couldn’t take it any more.
Mental point of order and Frame fail in play. What’s the point of winning if you you can’t take life any more?
Man, this guy just doesn’t stop, does he:
https://youtu.be/XnIFlD5Zvs8
“And he won that sales pitch . . .”
I’ll believe he existed outside of the pitch when I see the marriage and death certificates. If they’re witnessed by a Nigerian prince, I’m out. A remarkable number of Ukrainicorns have a similar pitch.
“Man, this guy just doesn’t stop, does he:”
Beat me to it.
“If they’re witnessed by a Nigerian prince, I’m out. A remarkable number of Ukrainicorns have a similar pitch.
Beat me to it also. I took the Ukrainian’s pitch as ridiculous, whereas I first attributed the pitch you spoke of to her former alleged husband physician that committed suicide by shooting himself in the chest (wtf, physician males cannot possibly be that stupid.) with a silly .357 with pearl handlebars.
She’s sub-communicating she’s a witch with her pitch.
Nickel plating? That’s really glossing. A stainless steel S&W 686 is as adequate as it gets. The leaf spring trigger is exquisite and a really amazing piece of work.
“Shaming is how women are taught to conform to norms”
https://twitter.com/westland_will/status/937819095994478592
@hh
Yeah. That too. We have been forged in the ancient fires of honor and sacrifice, but are living in times where no one gives a fuck about those. I guess we just have to evolve some more.
@Antihero
A shady woman targeting you for provision may mention a non existent doctor in her past impress on you where she expects you would be starting from (in terms of her expectations)
@cheupez, kfg, SJF
Yes, your comments have given me doubt as to the believability of her story. I honestly didn’t give it to much thought at the time past a ‘personal tragedy’.
She did though, show me images on her phone of the gun as though she was getting ready to put in on craigslist. or something.
Like I said, I was trying to get laid not looking for a relationship. So I quite when I recognized the dead end.
When you think about, even a blue pilled dude might see fit to run.
Hah, I just checked. I still have Halyna’s (Ukrainian for gold-digger) number. It was almost 3 years ago. No worries. Not even my morbid curiosity doesn’t want to find out the real story.
However, in my defense I just google doctors and suicide and I found this article. Over 400 a year kill themselves. Which puts it in the realm of possibility.
cheers
https://www.washingtonpost.com/national/health-science/when-doctors-commit-suicide-its-often-hushed-up/2014/07/14/d8f6eda8-e0fb-11e3-9743-bb9b59cde7b9_story.html?utm_term=.596e75842ebf
Key points 70’sAntiHero:
There is no such DHV as pearl handles on a .357.
The Ukrainicorn was trying to DHV her bad ass physician who offed himself. Which may have been a lie.
No smart physician would shoot himself in the chest rather than suck the barrel and know a bit about anatomy and physiology.
It’s really just semantics though.
It is not a thing. Put in Red Pill Frame, there is no there, there. Discrimination is not that hard.
It is called vapid. You just thought it was stimulating or challenging. It was not. A pink whole that was fleeting. No worse off for passing on it. Hence she was a non sequitur.