Late Life Hypergamy

Commenter YaReally dropped an interesting set of videos in last week’s comment thread and I thought I’d riff on them for a bit today. I’m not familiar with Loose Women (the TV show anyway), but from what I gather, it’s on par with The View or any similar mid-day women’s talk show. I don’t make a habit of watching shows dedicated to entertaining women’s need for indignation, but I regularly have readers email or tweet me segments asking for my take on certain aspects of them or how they relate to Red Pill awareness.

It should come as no shock to my readers that shows of this formula are a social manifestation of women’s base natures. Every conversation takes on a sense of seriousness and gravity, but the tone and the presumptuousness that drives these conversations are rooted in women’s solipsism. All iterations of this show are presented from a perspective that assumes a pre-understood feminine primacy. It’s also no coincidence that the rise in popularity of women’s talk shows has paralleled the comfort women have in embracing Hypergamy openly.

Whenever I get a link to something the women on The View discuss it’s almost always a confirmation of some Red Pill principle I’ve covered previously, and in this instance Loose Women doesn’t disappoint. Saira Khan (I apologize for my lack of knowing who she is or why I should care to) related to the panel of women – and the expectedly disproportionate female audience – that at 46 years of age and two children (only one by her husband) she has entered some commonly acknowledged phase where she finds herself lacking all libido for her husband.

I decided to write a full post on these clips because Saira amply demonstrates every facet of the latter phases of maturity I outlined in Preventive Medicine. She begins her self-serving apologetics by prequalifying her previously “fantastic sex life in her younger years” and moves on to her bewilderment over her lack of arousal for her glaringly Beta husband. We’ll get to him later, but she’s a textbook example of a woman in what I termed the Alpha Reinterest phase from Preventive Medicine. Granted, at 46 Saira is experiencing this “stage” a bit later than most women, but we have to consider the difficulty she had in having and adjusting to children later in life – all undoubtedly postponed by her obvious fempowerment mentality and careerism.

I love you, but I’m not in love with you

It’s likely most men in the Red Pill sphere have experienced and discussed this very common trope. Saira is quick to apply a version of this standard self-excusing social convention. She “loves her husband” and “he’s a great man”, but lately(?) she simply has no desire to fuck him. I’m highlighting this because it’s an important part of the psychology and the self-excusing rationales that revolve around the less-than-optimal outcome of women’s dualistic (AF/BB) sexual strategy.

It may serve readers better to review the Preventive Medicine series of posts, but the short version is this: Once a woman has settled on a man for her post-SMV peak life plans, and the routine and regimen of a life less exciting than her Party Years begins to reveal the nature of a (usually Beta) man she settled on, that’s when the subconscious sexual revulsion of him begins. The feral nature of

Hypergamy begins to inform her subconscious understanding of her situation – the man she settled for will never compare to the idealized sexuality of the men she’s been with prior to him. Alpha-qualifying shit tests (fitness tests) naturally follow, but Saira herself describes her sexual revulsion for Steve as a sense of “panic” at the thought of him expecting her to be genuinely sexual with him.

As such, there becomes a psycho-social imperative need to blunt and/or forgive these feelings for the “lack of libido” women experience for their Beta husbands. Thus, we get the now clichéd tropes about how “it’s not you, it’s me” or “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.” Both of which amount to the same message – I love you, but I have no desire to fuck you. You’re a great guy and a swell husband, but my pussy only gets wet for Alpha.

Saira exemplifies this in her assessment of her husband (Steve), but more so, she illustrates the disconnection she knows is necessary to insulate her ego from knowing exactly what’s “wrong” with her. The problem with her lack of libido becomes separated from the source, Steve. So she says it’s not him, she just doesn’t want to do it.

She qualifies herself as someone loveable (she still cuddles and gets comfort from Steve), but this lovable ‘good person’ doesn’t want her lack of arousal to be something to disqualify her from feeling good about herself.

Solution: make sex separate and ancillary to her relationship with her husband.

For women in this phase, sex is equated with a chore. It’s a chore because it’s not something she has a desire to do, but still feels obligated to do. Steve walks through the door at 6 and her subconscious understands that the expectation of her is that she should be aroused by this Beta man she’s trapped into living with for the rest of her life. Hypergamy informs her subconscious and the manifestation is to find ways to avoid sex with a man her Hypergamous sense acknowledges is a suboptimal sexual pairing. Her conscious, emotive, female mind understands that she should want to fuck him, but it wars with her hindbrain that is repulsed by just the imagining of it.

In order to contend with the internal conflict created by Hypergamy, and a woman’s settling on a poor consolidation of it, social conventions had to be created to make separating sexual arousal (Alpha Fucks) from women’s personal worth (Beta Bucks investment) and the attending bad feelings it causes for them.

Ironically, this show’s original premise was based on the question of whether sex was even a “must” on a couple’s wedding night. This is a prime example of separating desireless sex from women’s sense of personal worth. I wrote about this in Separating Values. If sex is ancillary or only an occasional bonus, it ceases to be a deal-breaking factor in marriage for women when they don’t have a desire to fuck their Beta husbands.

Conflating Values

One of the major problems women have, and more than even some red pill men have, is the conflation of sexual market value with their intrinsic personal value as a human being.

It needs to be emphasized that while personal value is influential in sexual market value, SMV is distinct from your value as a human being. I’m stressing this because, in the age Disney Princess empowerment, this conflation of the two has become a go-to social convention; and not just for women.

What Korth suffers from is presuming her personal value is her sexual market value.

It’s disruptive to her self-perceptions and ego-investments when that presumption is challenged by a man who doesn’t want to fuck her for reasons based on the intrinsic value she believes she’s entitled to by virtue of maturity and imaginings of self-sufficiency. Just as women aren’t aroused by men’s own self-concepts of virtuousness and aspirations of higher purpose, men aren’t aroused by whatever ephemeral self-perceptions a woman may have.

In Khan’s case, she (and the many women in the audience who nod in agreement with her) must devalue sex as an article or an object rather than accept that it’s something she wants to engage in, just not with Steve.

There are many other social conventions that aid women in avoiding sex with Beta husbands. An even more common convention is the popularly accepted idioms that “sex just naturally declines after marriage” or “men and women often have mismatched libidos.” Both of these have filtered into our popular consciousness, but they serve the same latent purpose – excusing a lack of desire caused by women interpreting their husband’s lack of Alpha sub-communications. Wives don’t get tingles from Beta husbands, thus, they need to find ways to offset the bad feelings for themselves first, and their husbands secondarily.

The trick in this is women not personalizing their lack of arousal with a husband’s self-worth – “it’s not you, it’s me” – and deferring to some naturally occurring biological or psychological event that can be conveniently attached to the mystique of women.

It’s not you, but it is you

Thus, the rationale morphs from “it’s not you, it’s me” into “it’s not you, it’s the time/circumstance/effort/need for help with the chores/phase of my mysterious woman-ness” that’s causing her lack of sexual desire.” She’s got a busy life, she’s got kids, and in her pursuit of perfection in these arenas, sex somehow falls by the wayside – or at least the kind of non-obligatory, hot, urgent sex she used to enjoy in her fantastic youth. It’s not you, it’s just life.

It’s not you, it’s wives ‘naturally’ lose interest in sex. It’s not you, it’s that she panics at the thought of you expecting her to be aroused by you.

If sex can be delimited to being all about the person then a lack of women’s arousal can’t be blamed on the mechanics of sex. So when men complain about a lack of sex from their wives or a lack of enthusiastic genuine desire, we get the response we hear from the panel of women on the show; a sarcastic shaming of men who raise the issue that their wives are frigid with them.

“Oh, how can men survive without sex?” or a sarcastic “No bloke can be in a relationship without sex” is a deemphasizing of the importance that the role of sex plays in a marriage and any intersexual relationship. Once again this is due to the separating of personal worth of a woman from the sexual mechanics of Hypergamy that prompt her to genuine arousal. The easiest solution is to cast men into the same sexual expectations as women; if women can forego sex then men ought to be able to “survive” without it too.

This normalized idea stems from the equalist perspective that men and women being equal should also share equal attitudes, prompts, and appetites for sex. This is a biological impossibility of course, but the conversation serves as a stark illustration of women expecting feminized men to identify with the feminine and prioritize that identification above any and all considerations about their experiences of being male.

Ultimately this is self-defeating for women because the nature of the Alpha guy that women crave pushes him to have sex, not to deny himself of it.

In fact, that sexual insistence is a prime indicator that a woman is dealing with an Alpha. The man agreeing to the patience and effort needed to “wait out” his wife’s frigidity is indicating that he’s not accustomed to insisting on, and getting what he wants. If he can sublimate his most powerful biological imperative – to get sex – what else is he willing to sublimate?

Sex is the glue that holds relationships together.

The ladies on the panel mock this idea for exactly the same reason Saira is tying herself in knots about not being hot for Steve. He needs sex, but he shouldn’t really need sex because it’s all about the person and not the mechanics. But it is exactly the mechanics of Hypergamy that are at the root of Saira’s need to solipsistically feel better about herself to the extent that she’ll publicly emasculate her husband on national TV.

As the show grinds on, all of the predictable rationales for wive’s self-consolations for a lack of sex get run down like a check list. Kids? Check. Career? Check. Never do they address that she’s a

Never do they address that she’s a 46-year-old woman raising small children or that her so overstressed condition is only one consequence of delaying what passes for motherhood to her for so long. I understand Saira and Steve struggled with infertility, but my guess is that this too was a physical result of the life choices she made and the difficulty of conceiving and carrying a child to term well after her fantastic sexual prime. I’m 48 and my daughter graduated high school this year so I can’t imagine facing parenthood in my mid/late 40s. This isn’t even an afterthought for the panel because it exposes the costs of the feminist-inspired careerism the show is triumphantly based upon.

Shit Tests and Marriage

As I mentioned earlier in this post, wives in this state will still shit test their husbands just as readily as any single woman. We are meant to believe, no we are expressly told, that Saira’s sexual revulsion is “normal” and it’s not Steve or his dedication that’s at issue. Yet during all of Saira’s journey of self-discovery about her lack of libido, she suggests that Steve go out and find a woman who will fuck him. At some stage in their great open communication, Saira gives Steve express permission to go out and bang another woman because she just can’t.

Naturally she couches this in the idea that she’s so devoted to him “as a person” that she just wants him to be happy, however, she is so repulsed by him, sex is a happiness she can’t find within herself to even feign for him. For all the shocked gasps from the women in the audience, what this amounts to is a very visceral shit test for Steve.

The purpose of the ‘dare’ for Saira is meant to determine whether Steve can still (if he ever) generate genuine sexual desire in other women. I’ve covered this dynamic in at least a dozen different posts – women want a man who other men want to be, and other women want to fuck. Steve’s steadfast devotion to his wife is anti-seductive and Saira, on some level of consciousness, knows this. If another woman found Steve attractive enough to bang it would generate Dread, social proof and confirm his preselection among other women. And as I’ve mentioned countless times, breakup sex (or near breakup sex) always trumps contrived, preplanned special occasion “date night” sex, which predictably is the suggestion that ends the second video.

And as I’ve mentioned countless times, breakup sex (or near breakup sex) always trumps contrived, preplanned special occasion “date night” sex, which predictably is the suggestion that ends the second video.

Steve, the dutiful Beta, is also predictably dumbfounded by her “suggestion”. He’s heartbroken from a feminized emotional perspective, but also because, like most Beta men, he’s heavily invested in the fallacy of Relational Equity. He’s observably sexually optionless so it’s a moot point, but if he were to muster up the balls and the Game to take her up on her oh so caring suggestion to fuck another woman, he risks losing the relationship equity he believes his rational, empowered wife should appreciate and factor into her attraction for him.

Thus, Steve comes up with rationalizations for why he didn’t take her up on her offer of permissive infidelity. He makes his necessity (really his optionlessness) a virtue and sticks to the standard Beta wait-it-out supportiveness he’s been conditioned for but is actually the source of his sexless marriage. He defaults to the “open communication” solves everything meme while ignoring the message that the medium of his wife’s sub-communication is telling him. Steve attributes everything (accurately) to his conditioning that most men, “typical blokes”, are Betas whose responsibility ought to be unconditional supportiveness when in fact they really have no other choice but to be so.

She doesn’t want to be ‘fixed’

One last thing occurred to me while I picked these clips apart. At the end, the panel of women defaults to the “it’s not you Steve, you’re a great guy, Saira’s just experiencing a normal frigidity that comes along for women in marriage.” I thought this was interesting because there’s a push to accept this frigidity as a normal phase women experience, but it still relies on the idea that sex and personal worth are two separate aspects of this problem.

If the root of this ‘normal’ problem is one about mechanics (it’s not Steve, it’s Saira’s physical/psychological malfunction) then I would expect there could be a mechanical solution to the problem. Even the fat brunette panelist suggest that all it takes is a better ‘effort’ on Saira’s part to get herself into the mood, but she even rejects this. Her problem isn’t a pharmaceutical one or a behavioral one, it’s a holistic one rooted in hardwired Hypergamy. So repulsive is the thought of fucking a Beta that Saira cannot psych herself up to do so.

I wondered if she would even consider taking the new “pink pill”, the female form of viagra, but I’ve read enough counter argument articles from women about it to know that women’s hardwired psychology prevents them from even chemically altering themselves to want to have sex with a man her Hypergamy cannot  accept. My guess is that even a cheeky holiday in the Maldives won’t be enough to convince Saira to want to fuck Steve.

However, this simple fact, that women will refuse to take the Spanish Fly to work themselves up and bypass their Hypergamy for their Beta husband’s happiness, destroys the convention that her frigidity is the result of her biomechanics. She doesn’t want a pill to fix her because she knows it’s a holistic problem.

Saira knows how to please Steve sexually, she simply doesn’t want to, and it’s because Steve is Steve.

 

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

757 comments on “Late Life Hypergamy

  1. ” . . . compulsory complimentary greetings to all females.”

    But it will be a compulsory conviction of rape whenever a female rejects the greeting.

  2. It does help to know who this woman is. She’s a television personality who got started in The Apprentice. She’s not a Real Person, but a creation, and creature, of the media publicity machine. The whole thing is likely a stunt. What decent person goes on television to discuss the intimate activity of their martial life? (Rhetorical question). So the publicity machine just hi-jacked TRM for a short while.

    I’ll hi-jack this to illustrate the Explanatory Equivalence Principle: any evo-psycho-based explanation of a woman’s behaviour can be replaced by one in which she is a Bad Person acting on self-interest, impulse, inadequate information and incompetent analysis.

    If she was a Good Person, she would say “I no longer want to be intimate with you, and since that’s no way to run a marriage, I will divorce you so you can get back out there and have a proper life, and I will not seek any payments from you.” Since she’s a Bad Person, she’s getting paid by TV producers for telling stories about her marriage and sounding a lot like someone setting up her husband for a divorce-for-cause (adultery) because she wants his money but not him, and that’s what divorce is for. (The UK doesn’t have fault-free divorce: you have to demonstrate “irretrievable breakdown”, and adultery is one such demonstration.)

    She’s doing this for a) money, and b) publicity that will, she hopes, lead to more money. The publicity motive vacates the content of anything she says. She may or may not be having sex with her husband, but we will never know. Even if we ask the husband, he could be in on the story as well. She doesn’t care if anyone likes her, admires her or just thinks she’s media trash with no morals. She just cares that she gets coverage.

  3. @ TheDeti

    <blockquoteThis is really key here, and it’s key for men reading this to understand what’s truly going on here. The basic truth is that Saira isn’t sexually attracted to Steve, her husband of 11 years whom she married when she was 35. She wants to have sex. She is interested in having sex. It’s just that she is not interested in sex WITH STEVE.

    But she knows that telling him this will crush him. So she makes up an elaborate excuse that she isn’t really interested in sex at all.

    …..Finally: this right here is why the emphasis is on increasing attraction. The solution isn’t to lambaste all older women for being hypergamous bitches. The solution for men is to increase their attraction, operate with necessary Dread, and if a relationship continues to yield less than satisfactory results, to walk away with as little ongoing financial obligation as possible.

    I agree with your assessment. I think Saira is just operating on Normal for women. If she is a cunt for using her television platform to throw Steve under the bus and lie to the hivemind, so what?

    I do think that Steve cannot pass the shit test because he lacks skills. I do think any man can garner red pill and game skills to recover. But Steve has no motive or opportunity (mostly the latter) to improve himself into a guy that Saira want to fuck.

    With the advent of the manophere and Rollo’s writing, Ian Ironwoods, and BluePillProfessor’s and MRP reddit (which is delivering some good shit these days) a guy can turn it around. But he has to have awareness, desire and skills to turn it around.

    A man doesn’t benefit from merely passing shit tests, he makes him self better and makes himself fuck-able.

    @The Man

    ….in the past I have noticed that you have virtue-signaled wrt fancying yourself as an intellect that helps save the lives of men and you got the emails to back it up apparently.

    For the sake of brevity all round, will you now publicly counsel SJF in that respect, given that he’s got that issue, and given you signal you got both the desire and the chops for that endeavor? Methinks you do have something to prove here, to the readership, and for SJF’s sake as well (after all he has drawn said conclusions from what he has absorbed here I would guess), so …… lotsa challenges today (as such it’s truly glorious to have man’s life, eh?)

    I’m not clear, because of your language exactly what issue I am afflicted by.
    Perhaps you can explain my predicament in proper English. What issue do i have?

    I’ve developed red pill awareness and have been an enthusiast for game. I whole-heartedly endorse masculine self improvement.

    I’ve been in Steve’s position (merely because of being unaware) and I’m here to say: Never Again!

    I’ve never been blue pill, although have experienced being beta provider. I’m comfortable with greater beta, lesser alpha because I don’t have the skills, natural ability nor the resources to be full on alpha (I don’t embrace beta or blue pill. If I do embrace Purple Pill it is merely because of trying to adapt and claw back–a utility). So I do the best I can with who I am and what I can accomplish (which is always a lot).

    I’m not an advocate for marriage nor for monogamy for men in 2016 even if my past comments were virtue signalling in that direction. Or stupidly humble-bragging. We are all different and should not be writing scripts for others. The script a man writes for himself should be a good one for him.

    I am a strong advocate for masculine self improvement. And adapting. I believe in changing and moving on to have more Real Power and a sexual strategy that works.

    Here’s Ali G giving his best The Man impersonation:

  4. @thedeti: The solution isn’t to lambaste all older women for being hypergamous bitches.

    True — the younger ones are too. (Chuckle.)

    You’re right: increase attraction; and remember, as @Blaximus reiterates, they’re just girls.

  5. Did anyone see that she took up Cross-fit around 2013 and lost a decent amount of weight and built up some muscle tone. Once she got in shape she felt, even more so than before, that she could do better than Steve:

    http://messages.herbiceps.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.cgi?num=1463645115

    For most Beta guys, it seems when the previously pudgy wife starts religiously going to the gym, that the relationship is over, the Beta husbands just don’t know it yet.

    The same thing is happening to Anthony Bourdain and his Italian MMA wife.

  6. How would you respond to the “fuck other girls” shit-test?

    I would just get up and walk away. Spend the night out, then come back fresh from a bath and never say a word.

  7. To The Man on
    Everything what Rollo and all TRP writhe-rs post here and on other blogs is one perfectly painted and well analyzed thrut. I am here for about 3 years and this what I founded here is like Enigma key for Enigma code machine. Every moment in my life, every Up and down is for the first time in my 38 years connected with with simple but perfect dots. And my friend when I look in lives of my brother, sisters, parents and friends everything look so perfectly clear and predictable with this TRP Enigma code opened. In past 4 years, a litle bit before I discovered this on internet I had an chanse to listen my ok boss at work, who was a natural alpha and still is. I was shocked by his storys and his knowledge about women but in same time lucky for chanse to see the “light”. Sory for bad english…

  8. Finally: this right here is why the emphasis is on increasing attraction. The solution isn’t to lambaste all older women for being hypergamous bitches. The solution for men is to increase their attraction, operate with necessary Dread, and if a relationship continues to yield less than satisfactory results, to walk away with as little ongoing financial obligation as possible.

    That’s just too much work. I’m willing to be good husband, in the traditional sense, but if I have to generate this much drama to keep a woman interested, and a misstep will result in losing my children, I’ll pass in favor non-marital relationships. If a girlfriend decides I’m too beta she doesn’t get my house.

  9. At one point in my marriage I found myself in the same spot. My wife decided that we were married in name only, and viewed me with disgust. Supplicating only made it worse. After wallowing in despair and unhappiness for a while, I got fed up and fixed things.

    First, I withdrew from her. No more foot rubs and back massages (you don’t like me to touch you, remember?). No more honey-do’s – I do what I determine is needed. No sex? No leverage.

    Second, I improved myself. Exercised, lost weight. I had time, with the removal of her chores from my workload.

    Third, I added some dread game (not that I knew what that was). When out together, she saw me casually flirting with other women.

    Then came the big fight. Understanding why came much later, but she was angry that I was proving myself not the loser she had pushed me into becoming, all unknowing. She demanded a divorce, and that I move out. I told her she would never see or hear from me again, never see our children, and never pay her a dime. She would lose the house and her chances of landing a decent guy with five children in tow were tiny. I would be married, or be gone. When I had finished saying goodbye to my children and had my duffel with clothes in hand, she gave in.

    We stayed married, and were together until cancer took her. Attitude was key – I had to decide that I would no longer be married, never see my children again and would leave the country, starting a new life with minimal resources. I could not bluff her, she knew me too well for that. I was not bluffing.

  10. The “Why don’t you fuck other girls?” statement is not a shit test to pass.

    It is a wake up call that you are doing everything wrong in your relationship.

    It is a statement that you are not fuck-worthy.

    A shit test is when a woman is testing to see if you are worthy.

    That statement is an acknowledgement that she has already decided that you are not worthy. It is saying Go Away from me.

  11. ” Finally: this right here is why the emphasis is on increasing attraction. The solution isn’t to lambaste all older women for being hypergamous bitches. The solution for men is to increase their attraction, operate with necessary Dread, and if a relationship continues to yield less than satisfactory results, to walk away with as little ongoing financial obligation as possible.”

    ” That’s just too much work. I’m willing to be good husband, in the traditional sense, but if I have to generate this much drama to keep a woman interested, and a misstep will result in losing my children, I’ll pass in favor non-marital relationships. If a girlfriend decides I’m too beta she doesn’t get my house.”

    Being a ” good husband in the traditional sense..”, I would like some further description and clarification as to what constitutes a ” good husband ” in your view.

    There is naturally a certain level of drama that a man must generate with a woman. Always remember that females are more driven by drama than we are. The way we need to communicate with them will vary greatly in how we talk to other men. This is true whether you are dealing with a wife, or a girlfriend, or a One Night Stand.

    This is not work, don’t look at it that way.

    I spend a few weeks a year in Puerto Rico. I don’t think of learning to speak Spanish better as too much work, because it’s my choice to go there and communicate with anyone, anywhere while there.

    Piece of friendly advice: Always avoid being a boring motherfucker in the eyes of women, or even people in general.

    You will strive to be “better “, not for a woman, but for yourself and the pleasure it will bring to your life as a whole.

    I don’t know just yet if I am on board with trying to change yourself for a woman after the fact. Didn’t work for me. It is possible to turn a bad relationship around by ” improving ” your outlook, mindset and understanding. The determining factors will be 1) how long has the ship been sinking 2) how strong your will is, and 3) whether the woman in the relationship with you is really a cold, heartless bitch that you made a mistake in engaging from the start.

    You increase attraction first and foremost for yourself and the benefits will follow.

    I’m gonna express something that will probably go over like a fart in church.

    I am all for dread. It is a wonderful thing that helps immensely. …. ok, how can I put this next part…

    In my mind, a man needs to also cultivate with his partner, just a touch of fear and a little bit of danger. I’m not talking abuse or threatening ( before scribbler comes in yelling about being abusive, then storming out in a huff..), but there has to be some kind of ultimate incentive for a woman to not try to destroy and walk all over you.

    As I’ve said here countless times, I Love My Wife with most of my heart..lol.. and I would pack up my shit and leave before ever hitting her even once. Yet, I don’t think SHE knows that absolutely. The same held true for my first wife, who would wince and cower if I raised my voice above acceptable, normal levels. Neither woman was any kind of shrinking violet. Both wives were tough chicks because that’s what I’m really attracted to, but I shut down any aggressive behavior that might have been directed towards me in the earliest stages or dating/relationship phase.

    If that wasn’t possible, NEXT.

    I guess maybe it could be more attributed to respect, but there is a little bit of fear there also.

    Respect from women comes from a man enforcing boundaries of acceptable behavior.

    As far as the Hard Work, it’s easy to cultivate. Stand up straight, lower the octave of your voice, maintain eye contact and stay calm. Say whatever the fuck you want to say, using whatever colorful language you’d like.

    She’s gotta know that you are not playing.

    The flipside is, that in order for this to work, you must be kind and loving the rest of the time. You can’t scowl and bark often because it loses it’s impact.

    Being kind and loving in no way means being feminine. Always be masculine, never dilute that in any way. Increasing you masculine quotient should never be seen as too much work. It will ALWAYS benefit you in the end, and it will touch every aspect of your life outside of relationships with women. Remember, it not about them per se, it’s always about you.

    I cannot fathom a bitch like the one in the videos talking shit like she does towards me. I am NOT having that bullshit, and she would have understood that a long time ago, and I would’ve happily reminded her when she chose to get ” out of pocket “.

    About a week ago, I was having a conversation with a young chick in a bar/restaurant. It was a wonderful and interesting chat that ran the gamut of topics. Towards the end of the evening, she commented something along the lines of ” I think I’d give a man like you the opportunity to please me, no matter how much Viagra it takes..”, or some such shit. Hard left turn.

    Me: what? wait-a-minute, what did you say??

    her: Laughing, I was just kidding…

    Me: Oh hell nah, why the fuck would you even think that?

    her: Not laughing now – Ohh wait, it was..

    Me: Listen, I’m not THAT DUDE, do not fuck with me like that.

    her: I’m sooorrryyyy, don’t be so sensitive…

    Me: Sensitive??? You got shit twisted.

    her: Okay, okay…calm down. Temper, temper…

    Me: Shut the fuck up with that bullshit. Why would you think to say some shit like that to me?

    her: I’m really sorry. It was a bad choice of words on my part.

    silence.

    her: Hey, I’m really sorry.

    Me: Aight. Watch your mouth. * to myself * fucking chicks man….

    her: We still good? Wow, you’re intense.

    Me: Yeah, and no Viagra needed.

    her: Fuck man, I regret the hell outta that.

    Then the conversation continued. No further issues. Her eyes were a little bigger though.

    Only on a few occasions have I run into the super-fem, ” I will back down from no man ” types. They aren’t a majority.

    Exercise your will.

    Do not accept any shit.

    If she would’ve gotten up and walked away, zfg. But if I was in the market for a chick, she is passing the first test. Bow down when appropriate.

    … I’m actually kind of pissed typing this now. Lol… fucking broads.

    Test them. Don’t take tests from them.

  12. @ Blax- Right, because a man who’s accepted the social conditioning and training his entire life which has fed to him BY WOMEN to be a good man, and to be an equalist is also accountable for that behavior drying up his wife’s pussy.

    Wow, am I getting tired of the Super-Blax stuff…

  13. How would you respond to the “fuck other girls” shit-test?

    when a woman asks this question key is to reply like The Man. For example:

    Her: I don’t want to have sex with you, you can go fuck other women

    You: Methinks the sweet aroma of challenge is now in the air, but there are important conceptual layers, that lie even deeper,

    Her: What? Are you actually going to go fuck other women?

    You: I have some things to do today, but if I had some assurances I wouldn’t be self-loathing but if that’s not forthcoming, well then I will conclude this isn’t worth my time here, and I’ll go somewhere else, or perhaps go write my own book

    Her: What are you saying?

    You: Your stuff doesn’t even come close to passing the sniff test, mainstream-wise. That would mean actually thoughtfully engaging with me. Of course I will be using your material, by way of example.

    Her: I don’t understand a word you are saying.

    You: Half-truths are abundant here and often half-truths are more obfuscatory and damaging to peoples’ lives, than nothing at all, and better inform around the issue of culpability.

    Her: I can’t take this, go fuck other women, please,

    You: Do I have your assurances that my point of view may be worthy of your consideration, and as such, a better level or respect with me should naturally be forthcoming from you, as to which it is obvious I have not enjoyed to date?

  14. ” Wow, am I getting tired of the Super-Blax stuff…”

    Drink a cup of coffee and peep this –

    Your problem is that you are gauging me through your scrib glasses.

    It confuses you that way.

    If you have issues with what I try to say to guys here, keep it to yourself and scroll past.

    I’m just as tired of you and your constant hyper flip flopping confusion.

    I know who I am.

    Go sit in your coffee shop of fuck some dudes girlfriend or pedestalize chicks or whatever the fuck you’re doing these days.

    If what I say doesn’t pertain to you, keep moving.

    1. He’s a douchebag. I scroll past every comment he makes. He needs professional psychiatric help.

  15. And by all means, this poor sap should be “honorable” and not fuck some hot, tight snatch, right?

  16. “Saira knows how to please Steve sexually, she simply doesn’t want to, and it’s because Steve is Steve.” – This is the truth of the vids and sexual attraction.

    What’s interesting are the questions that never get asked of Saira. Like, does she ever get attracted to any man? Does she masturbate? Has she seen an MD to see if there is a medical issue? Will she try watching porn with him? Has she considered at least jacking off or blowing Steve out of a sense of love for him and recognition of his needs?

    This last part is what hurt Steve the most when she suggested and “open relationship”. She actually cares so little for him that she’d rather he go fuck someone else than her actually maybe going along sometimes, with Steve’s pleasure being primary in the encounter. What he gets is that he is so unimportant to him that she can’t give him even a sympathy BJ.

    When the roles are reversed though, well that’s why Cialis and Viagra are making pharma companies tens of billions. If a man can’t be desirous of his wife, well he should take a pill that makes him hard to he can pile drive her even though looking at her makes him ill. No question of what he wants or how he feels, just shame, shame, shame – you are a man, you should always be down to fuck your wife.

    But like I said, Steve is “honorable” – fucking schmuck. He doesn’t even realize that if he acted like a dog and made his needs primary and acted entitled to pussy he’d be getting fucked by his wife. The very fact that he had options would make her wet.

    But he’s been blinded by a lifetime of Blue Pill conditioning, and hey, maybe he’s been reading SJF and Blaximus too?

  17. Look at she looks at him in the 2nd video…in the beginning…pathetic!!

    I remember how chics used to talk about…”you have to best friends…soul mates…with your wife,” when I was younger….even my older sisters….

    No….

    That situation is literally hell

  18. No, Blax, I’m not confused at all. You are a rock star, boxer, philosopher, political wizard, genius, cock-swain, IT wizard, financial genius, mini-celebrity, authority on women, marriage, fucking and in general are a badass, got a story for every situation which shows how awesome I am kind of guy. You are coming in 5 over 5.

    I bow before you unending awesomeness and only hope someday I can be just like you. Please, continue to enlighten and instruct the rest of us who bow at your feet.

    @SJF too – Please post another fucking wall of Deida and other intolerable didactic hyperbole, I’m just gagging for it.

    Or perhaps you both might try and come down to earth with the rest of us who seem to not have pat answers for every motherfucking comment and essay here. Just a thought, guys.

  19. @NBTM: On the “hall pass” question…

    Blue pill consider it an a front to their ‘white night’ solipsism….they’re “hurt” (😁…😑) by being presented with an opportunity to be red pill.
    This sullies their virtuous nature…and drags them deeper into the miasma of self deceit that is the blue pill…
    To break free isn’t even on the fringes of their wildest imagination…

  20. Don’t hate.

    I didn’t spend 55 years floundering about.

    55 years is a long time.

    http://img.gauraw.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/A-Man-who-sees-the-world-same-at-50-as-he-did-at-20-has-just-wasted-30-years-of-his-life-Mohammad-Ali-Quote.jpg

    I got 55 years of stories. Now, you’ll be one, in some fashion, concerning confused men.

    Tell me, when you look back over your life, what will you see?

    Is it more anguish and despair, or accomplishment?

    Will it consist of pining away for ” young, tight, hawt pussy “????

    That’s a hell of a life.

    Kudos to you on that.

    I don’t stress or pine for shit. Lol.

    I worked long and hard to get my shit together and have a life. I didn’t have the luxury of being bitter and confused.

    At your age, if you are still desperately grasping for answers, understand that your time is just about done. You’ve done a pretty shitty job.

    … Oh, and you left out my race car exploits, but that’s okay.

    ( and btw, you were always yelling about your N-count. Lmfao… triple that shit pal..)

  21. As I’ve become more of a spectator here, the kind of incessant posing going on is becoming quite apparent. It’s as though this comment section exists purely for ego validation and LARPing for some. There is no issue certain folks here don’t weigh in on with complete knowledge and in depth, 100% direction, nonstop. There is no argument they won’t continue. There is no point where they stop and say, “Hey, maybe I’m just being a loudmouthed asshole?”

    Fair enough, do as you will. As I will. But that’s how it seems to me. Continue to preach it and preen it, brothers, but men who’s comments I used to read with rapt attention are now signals for my scroll wheel.

    Not YaReally, fyi, his points are mostly spot on and valuable not about ego gratification and the endless pursuit of being right. He’s just a Red Pill genius who is generous enough to help us.

    Happy Friday, everyone.

  22. “But like I said, Steve is “honorable” – fucking schmuck. He doesn’t even realize that if he acted like a dog and made his needs primary and acted entitled to pussy he’d be getting fucked by his wife. The very fact that he had options would make her wet.

    But he’s been blinded by a lifetime of Blue Pill conditioning, and hey, maybe he’s been reading SJF and Blaximus too?”

    I don’t advocate honorable-ness to women that don’t want to fuck their man. Either you walk away, or you make yourself more desirable.

    I advocate for men being honorable among men for being desirable to their woman.

    Impugning Blax and SJF for being blue pill is psychological projection. Neither of us have a blue pill bone in our body. Whether we have a purple pill bone in ourselves is up for debate. But you might have wanted to walk a mile in our shoes first before making that accusation. Once again, do we appear to be frustrated, desperate or not at peace with our station in life?

    Blaximus was socially conditioned by an excellent masculine patriarchal family and related milieu.

    I was socially conditioned in a marriage-centric UMC society. I’m not advocating this for others, but it is really working for me, not because it’s weak, socially conditioned, but because I make it work.

    I hope my son makes women come to him and doesn’t have a lack of abundance and he has freedom from constraint. I hope he engages in a toxic social condition and he penetrates life with his masculinity. So far it is working that way.

    There is good social conditioning and then there is toxic social conditioning.
    I prefer the former.

    Any reference to my lifestyle includes antecedent paths I took that seemed to be the right thing to do at the time. And I’m not disappointed.

    I still find any path a man wants to take with red pill awareness and game will have purpose as long he has enthusiasm to pursue that path and has desire to gain mastery over that path.

    I don’t believe a man has an option to sit back and not take a path. That would require him not pushing his edge and not having strength, courage, mastery or honor among men.

    Monogamy and marriage are not a goal or even an issue here. Mastery, pursuing a dream and desire to be fuckable are.

    Blax and I are advocating for Steve Hyde to not be a blue pill pussy. He has unconscious incompetence in being fuckable.

  23. @ SJF

    Man, scrib is disintegrating right before my very eyes.

    He’s my boy, but I am not having him trying to read me. I didn’t say shit as he popped in and sniped at me a few times, because I know how he is.

    Hopefully he’ll go pussy-begging and crawl into a tight snatch and get in a better mood.

  24. “Finally: this right here is why the emphasis is on increasing attraction. The solution isn’t to lambaste all older women for being hypergamous bitches. The solution for men is to increase their attraction, operate with necessary Dread, and if a relationship continues to yield less than satisfactory results, to walk away with as little ongoing financial obligation as possible.”

    “That’s just too much work.”

    Not.
    Did this. In super shape for a 57 yo. Did other things (details not important here) to raise smv. It *was* alot of work but when I bailed, I was in great form to start gaming younger women. Whatever effort you put in you can use use later on whichever way it goes – because you are investing in yourself.

  25. @scribblerg
    “Not YaReally, fyi, his points are mostly spot on and valuable not about ego gratification and the endless pursuit of being right.”

    lol <3 I'm not here to make friends or gain some street rep props or be a part of a social chit-chat club, I have friends in real life for that shit lol I'm just here to share information and point out inaccuracies, inconsistencies, and shit that don't hold up infield.

    But at the end of the day you're all just names on a screen to me so I don't care about the dick-waving swordfights or what you guys have done or not done with your 50+ years of life. All I care about is the truth and what consistently holds up infield. If what you say aligns with the field, cool, if it doesn't hold up or it contradicts what we see infield, then I call it out. I'd call Tyler himself out if he was spouting stuff that didn't hold up infield. And I'd support even Wild Man if what he said aligned with the field.

    This can be annoying to the guys who think seniority/experience means their points deserve to carry more weight even though what they're saying is wrong/inaccurate because they feel like they deserve some default level of respect and they really really really FEEL like they're right, but their feels are ultimately irrelevant. All that matters is getting accurate information to men trying to change their lives so we don't produce more Steve Hydes.

    @Blaximus
    "Hopefully he’ll go pussy-begging"

    If you want to go down the discussion path you keep poking at where pickup is "pussy-begging" and shallow meaningless shit and getting married into monogamy is the one true honorable lifestyle, I'll be happy to dig into that discussion with you. But personally I'd rather you toned down the high-horse holier than thou shaming shit a bit. We hear that stuff enough from the Jezebel crowd.

    But not tonight, because it's Friday night. I have to go be a shameful pussy-beggar who's wasting my life not being honorable.

  26. ” If you want to go down the discussion path you keep poking at where pickup is “pussy-begging” and shallow meaningless shit and getting married into monogamy is the one true honorable lifestyle, I’ll be happy to dig into that discussion with you. But personally I’d rather you toned down the high-horse holier than thou shaming shit a bit. We hear that stuff enough from the Jezebel crowd”

    Wtf??? Is it opposite day and no one told me??

    I never said ANY such thing.

    I referred to pussy begging because that’s what I think it sounds like scrib is doing.

    I didn’t say shit about PUA’s.

    Why the fuck is everybody so touchy today?

    Lmfao.

  27. Oh, and btw, I don’t care if younger cats listen to older guys.

    My nose will still have skin on it.

    I just try to answer questions if I think I have a pov that might help.

  28. “Or perhaps you both might try and come down to earth with the rest of us who seem to not have pat answers for every motherfucking comment and essay here. Just a thought, guys.”

    Maybe I’ll come down to earth with the rest of you when I figure it all out (and at that point I’ll stop commenting). And maybe I will also stop when you come up to the sublime. I always wish for the best of the commenter tribe, even if I don’t communicate or show it. The manosphere tribe uber alles (over all).

    I’ve fallen prey to getting offended by YaReally’s general exhortations and am over it, don’t get offended by SJF and Blax’s exhortations. They are not offensive. They are attempts at helping younger, lost guys. We are not targeting PUA lifestyle, nor advocating our lifestyle. We are targeting masculine self improvement and fuckability (sexual strategy). Which relates to the OP. And don’t be a Steve.

    I’m not so sure why striving and achieving are so offensive. The striving and achieving are antecedent to our current stations in life. I’ve strived and achieved that past 25 years.

    The non-issue marriage and monogamy are antecedents. Reference points that are maintained. With the best performance we have.

  29. @ SJF

    Yeah, I don’t get the whole targeting PUA thing.

    I also don’t get why scrib has been showing up and throwing shit around.

    I don’t care for the whole ” age ” denigration thing, but..whatever. Like I told scrib, I know who I am.

    I like Ya, but he’s not infallible. He’s good on the PUA front, and he’s pushed me into thinking outside the box, but I did manage to learn some things in life and I have something to offer…or so I think.

    I don’t believe the entire comment section must consist of ” fuck young girls ” all the time. Maybe I’m mistaken.

    Nah, I’m right.

    There’s more to life. Lol, scrib outlined some stuff I’ve done, even though he was sarcastically mocking me ( zfg ), so I always try to tell guys that they can do whatever they can dream up in life. Not just stress over pussy. I thought it provided some balance.

    Oh well.

    Happy Father’s Day!!!!!

  30. @Blaximus

    Man, scrib is disintegrating right before my very eyes.

    He’s actually not. He is a good man that I will stand by pretty much forever because my offline/behind the scenes association with him.

    He is just working shit out. And he is in a better place than previously. I can’t recall if it was 15 months ago or two years ago, he was in a funk. I don’t see him in a funk now, and every adversarial thing he says I take as a positive mental mindset (as a brother in arms).

    He is attacking you metaphorically, not personally. You represent everything that he got fucked in the ass for trying to accomplish.

    @YaReally

    Long term relationship game is not for nothing. Last time I checked you are dreaming of that in 10 years. LTR game takes perspective.

    What don’t you want to know about truth to power about LTR game and what holds up in the field (bedroom/home/social scene) for LTR in the future? You can always learn that stuff on the fly in the future.

    Women are wonderful, have great energy. Older women have strength of character that is often not mold-able.

    I get a boner for your talk about 25 year old pussy PUA game, but my wife also passes an ongoing boner test.

    TL;DR Our comments are complementary not adversarial.

  31. I had this situation in 2012 while an intern at the White House a woman dumped her LTBF and got with me. Everything was fine until my clearance didn’t go through, then the excuses started. This went on for 3 mo. I got tired of it, dumped her ass and kept it moving. This is when I found the Rational Male, got to the gym, grew a beard, got a motorcycle and finished my MBA. I show back up to her door in 2014 with a hickey on my neck and another 7 notches. I saw the dread when we dated the second time as well as the urgency. I kept 3 women in my back pocket and stayed on the hunt for more, then it turns out that some of them knew each other and it all went to hell and she broke it off with me. The following week I had 3 new women. The moral of the story is don’t be like Steve…don’t be “that guy”.

  32. “I don’t believe the entire comment section must consist of ” fuck young girls ” all the time. Maybe I’m mistaken.

    Nah, I’m right.”

    I’m glad you can say that with a high testosterone level. It is more authentic that way.

    I resonate with that because of my four thousand other adventures in life besides pussy.

    My non pussy pursuing adventures with sublime peak experiences allow me to know the difference.

    And long term relationship pussy doesn’t become un-fulfilling unless you
    let is like clueless Steve Hyde.

    I hope not to belabor the points, but it is about Game and Agency. No matter what the relationship platform.

  33. @ SJF

    ” He is just working shit out. And he is in a better place than previously. I can’t recall if it was 15 months ago or two years ago, he was in a funk. I don’t see him in a funk now, and every adversarial thing he says I take as a positive mental mindset (as a brother in arms). ”

    Yeah, I hear you man. I know how he can be. He knows how he can be too. Lol.

    Maybe I shoulda just scrolled. He is a good man, but damn, he has a mean streak..Lol. It’s not as acerbic as it was a while ago, but it’s right there beneath the surface.

    I understand he’s working shit out. What he doesn’t realize is that I’m pulling for him, even if I disagree with him.

    Ya though, is getting a little thin skinned lately. He’s got on me twice for something I never said towards him. I didn’t correct him and just let it go away, but now it’s like he’s waiting to pounce. Lol. Like I’m insulting him or something.

    Like the whole marriage/honor thing. What the hell? No matter how many times I say ” I don’t advocate marriage…” I keep hearing snipes about my thoughts that marriage is the only honorable option or some shit, which I’ve never said. Not once. That’s some dumb shit right there.

    But it’s not important.

    I was thinking that maybe I should just read the op’s and skip the comments. There is such a thing as wearing out your welcome.

    Lol, maybe scrib is right, and I’ve become a loudmouthed asshole.

    http://previews.123rf.com/images/vectorshots/vectorshots1602/vectorshots160200102/52150753-Excited-Smiley-Screaming-Emoji-Smiley-Emoticon-Stock-Vector.jpg

  34. At Blax:

    “Ya though, is getting a little thin skinned lately. He’s got on me twice for something I never said towards him. ”

    It’s pretty easy to psychologically observe a thing or two due to one’s acuity.

    I don’t want to be anti-tribe for Scrib and YaR.

    But there is some frustration and cognitive dissonance going on.

    I fight battles. But I have never been so at peace with my self.

    Don’t want to poke the beasts. Ya and Scrib will be fine. But Rollo, TRM and the manophere are here to get men through red pill/game triage.

    I don’t mean to achieve less than helping men in the tribe out.

  35. Rollo says don’t get married (see above, and previous posts). r/TheRedPill generally says don’t get married. Ya and some of the PUA squad as they get older say one needs to refine marriage, and Mystery says he’s fucked. MGTOW consider marriage extreme torture. So let’s develop the case for marriage. In reply don’t attack me personally (you’re an idiot) but feel free to attack the writing harshly, pull no punches (okay: that is the stupidest thing ever).

    Baseline assumptions, a man is only to get married if:
    – is 32+
    – is financially solvent and independent
    – has N count of 20+
    – has extensive Red Pill knowledge for at least three years
    – wants to soon as possible have children

    Let’s call him H and her W.

    W must:
    – be 27 or younger
    – as best can be determined does not have a 10+ count
    – has a college degree, is intelligent
    – eats well
    – no drugs or meds, drinks little
    – treats people nicely
    – does not chart as a Cluster B
    – loves children, and wants to have children as soon as married
    – has bloodline that seems to age well
    – fuck as H wants
    – is SMV -2 to H at this time

    There is a pre-nup that covers any college debt she has and the assets he brings in.

    H’s goal is to be an everyday parent for his children up to when they go off to college etc. H has to stay married 22+ years, at which point he will be at least 54 (32+22) with declining opportunity if he were to get divorced at that time.

    HW get married, she pops out a couple (he secretly DNA tests), they get sleep deprived, W is occupied by the kids, soccer mom in yoga pants, H is focused on obtaining resources for the family. They own a house, drive a SMV, watch Netflix.

    W has dropped 1 in SMV, aging and having kids. As long as H stays in decent shape SMV differential will remain about -3 for the next 20 years. Fast forward a few years, H has been locked into single SMV -3 pussy for a long time.

    Now W knows she has H by the balls. She can walk for cash & prizes. The divorce industrial complex continue to sell splitting up. Other couples including some of her friends divorce.

    However none of her friends who divorce can get in a relationship with a man better than H. In fact the guys they do hook up with are fleeting or flawed. Her divorced friends would try for H if he became a free agent, since relative to other guys in the same bracket he’s a catch.

    H runs game on W, and runs game on other women, W has dread. They have a good sex life.

    Hypergamously, at SMV -3 it feels right for her to stay married.

    So for H, if the marriage lasts 22+ years he gets:
    – children he raised with W
    – steady SMV -3 pussy
    – stability
    – decent quality of life (house/SUV)

    He drops/misses:
    – about $250K per kid
    – plenty of pussy at SMV -2 or better, which he would have gotten since he knows game
    – loss of a lot of personal time/freedom

    If the marriage falls apart before 22+ years, he gets after the split:
    – children he partly raises, but other “dads” in their lives
    – emotional messy time
    – SMV -2 or better pussy, not consistent
    – more adventure
    – decreased quality of life (condo, smaller car)

    So if having and raising children is a key priority for you, red pill man, then marriage is viable and a decent bet assuming the two of you meet the conditions given above, and you are willing to accept the costs and risks.

    I have a collection of Father’s Day cards. They cost me a lot.

  36. This Steve and this hypregameous woman suggest that serial LTR are the way to go. If you are too lazy, ignorant, or just ego invested in FI BS, then instead of improving attractiveness, just get a new SO every 8-12 years or so once she runs out of desire for you. If the bottle is empty then quit trying to drink from it. One-it-is Steve is like that guy at the party that just doesn’t know when it’s time to leave the party. Kids run on a 16-18 year schedule, so hypergamous branch swings on a 8-12 year schedule don’t synch up very well, which complicates the serial LTR strategy.

  37. This same thing happened to me. Got married at 24 and had sex maybe 20 times in 20 years. Turned me into a sad depressed overwieght alco and kicked me out last october.

    It took me 9 days to find a 26 yo girlfriend with the Red Pill.

    9 Fucking days!!!!

  38. ” . . . if having and raising children is a key priority for you, red pill man . . .”

    . . . there is no reason to get married. “Bastard” is an archaic concept, both socially and legally, as is male ownership of children and thus “Legitimacy.”

    At the very least do not license your marriage with the government (the license is not what constitutes a marriage. It only constitutes your consent to include the government as a third party), be in a legal jurisdiction that isn’t community property, doesn’t recognize common law marriage and have your lawyer draw up contracts under the uniform commercial code that constitutes a civil partnership.

    But I know of no place in the “Western” world where your children can be yours. The state de facto claims ownership and default custody goes to the mother.

  39. @culum @hadb @yareally @forge

    Made progress on internals a bunch. Understand a lot.

    Hungover and sick, but went to mall in city I like. Didn’t have much time there. but got to look around. Opened a few people, but couldn’t quite go and do daygame on girls.

    Like for culum, I undertsnad where you are at with feeling compelled to buy food for girls when you go out. For me that’s ridiculous because lol their girls. They get free shit all the time. I think its funny to make THEM buy ME shit. But I understand the feeling, since I have that with sexualizing outside of places you’d normally do it. I know I can do it, it just you feel this resistance. Like you got stuck in mud.

    Easy to get over though. Just have to keep going out. Even if I don’t open, the experience of being out in those situations and imagining opening makes it become more comfortable, so eventually I will. That’s a major block for me, and once I can get past that I will be able to get a shitton of numbers. But, like with you and buying dinners, it will take a lot of time to get over it.

    If I could go practice grabbing numbers quick and escalating at a nightclub, I could get past it in a night lol. But since my locations is bad its gonna take a lot longer to work through it.

    Despite not going for numbers AT ALL, still felt great. Lots more of girls of my type here, and its a new place. I get energized from being out around people and from going to new places. I’m also picking up on the fact that I am fairly extroverted. I was raised to be an introvert though. I remember seeing a video tape from when I was 5 and would not shut the fuck up lol. But as I aged I got quiter. This was from my family. I remember a bit later we were to fill out personality tests. I was 7 or so. And I picked out that I was extroverted. My parents were like “no no you are more introverted.” My dad was also pretty serious and would, not get mad when I messed around and was expressing myself, but would just shake his head. Not like really offended, but just from “I don’t understand this.” Like if you hear of people putting ketchup on hashbrowns lol Wierd. Anyway, all that gradually made me get more withdrawn. Later my parents were like “You used to talk so much, why don’t you talk to us more.” But it was actually mostly because of my parents that I became introverted lol. Like thats the MAIN reason.

    Also saw a 8 or 9 blakc girl. The kind I like, frizzy curly hair, petite. Saw her 3 times lol. First in a store (should have gone in then and looked around before opening her about what’s a good suggestion) then at food court, then as I was leaving. So I was like, I am going to try to open. But, she was way ahead. Couldn’t quite catch up to her (though I tried), would have had to shout at her lol. Not quite ready to be that over the top lol. But I felt very good about it because it wasn’t an issue of buffering or anything. I can tell when I am making excuses versus when there is a legitamate obsticle. So felt good afterwards, even if a little dissapointed. How many guys would even consider approaching such a girl lol.

    Felt very good from going out. Actually forgot that I felt bad lol (though it still affected me, as in that was part of the reason I didn’t open much was because my mind was sluggish and thing weren’t coming to me like they usually do.)

    Went back to mall in city I don’t like. And immediately felt like shit. Here’s whats up with this city. I used to go here a lot, so its draining to be in the same place. Makes me feel stuck. Unlike the city I do like which is fairly new to me. Also, this was back from when I felt like I was bad with girls. So it makes it MUCH harder to daygame, since I also now have this old view of myself that I have to fight past. Also have bad memories here. Had an issue where I had a conflict with one of my friends and basically I got blamed for everything and everyone stopped hanging out with me.

    So, especially in this city, I feel like I shouldn’t be doing game, that things won’t work out, and as soon as I start to do something with a girl everyone is going to jump out and be like “Fuck you. You are a creep. GTFO.”

    Its not something I can’t work past, but it requires a HUGE amount of effort to push past it.

    Basically, I need to force myself into state. When I am in the good city, it takes far less effort. In the bad city, I have to expend a ton of eneergy just to get past all the baggage there before I can even START to move my thoughts in a positive direction.

    Same with the smaller town where I had the bad FR right before I had the awesome one in the good city. I used to live in that town. So its got the same shit there. Thats actualy mostly why I had a bad day there then lol. The day I scouted it out and thinsg were better was because I switched venues super fast and went to places I hadn’t been to before.

    Becomeing VERY aware of my mental state and how certain things affect it.

    So now going to focus just on good city. Have a nice range of places to go now. Mall, Day 2 area, downtown. And for downtown, can go to coffee house first, then bar, then wander around late at night to do approaches and go for numbers.

    It was fascinating today observing my state and how I got pumped up wandering around the mall in the good city, and felt great afterwards even though I didn’t do anywhere NEAR what I wanted to. Then I go to the mall in the bad city, feel like shit, and afterwards get in this very negative mindset and think of all the bad things going on in my life.

    Just travel a few miles and my mental state changes drastically.

  40. Thanks Rollo for putting these clips up.

    Steve, what were you thinking?

    It’s one thing being told essentially, “please go and fuck someone else because I can’t be bothered” and quite another to go on a daytime chat show for bored women and confess your bemusement at being passed over.
    Do not you think the two are linked?

    I would rather disembowel myself rather than do that and I would like to think 99% of your readers would agree.
    How do you ever recover from that position?

    If I was Steve I would take that free pass with both hands and fill my boots!

    Thanks again Rollo for your essential work.

  41. @redlight

    Great breakdown. The growing SMV disparity is the most pivotal thing for me as it gets a lot less press in the manosphere. Many of the other issues of hypergamy, divorce rape etc draw a lot of discussion, but how a redpill man outpaces his wife over the years in terms of SMV doesn’t get much play.

    To me that factor is the finally nuclear bomb strike in this argument over whether or not to get married. The blue pill disaster marriages, the FI and why it’s bad…that’s all very obvious after a few months in the manosphere.

    But it’s not often that anyone goes where you went. What if you’re alpha, stack cash, lift, land a HB9, maintain frame and you stay married? Well, so what?

    What’s the reward? Kids, sure and maybe a good, satisfying long-term friendship with someone that you love and can’t leave or don’t want to leave. That’s cool and I’m not trying to devalue anyone’s marriage at all. But the idea that even the absolute ideal marriage still is heavily shaded with the FI is kind of grim. It’s doesn’t address the male imperative of wanting sex with high SMV women. A 10 who marries and has kids will be a 6 to her alpha husband after a few years. She’ll be a 10 to slobbering betas but a 6 to her alpha just due to sharing a bathroom, kids and the general absence of novelty.

    So even assuming the absolute ideal in both yourself and your wife, this will still leave you in a marriage with a woman who doesn’t give you even a third of the woody-charge of the teenage girls down at the mall. (Late teenage, okay?)

    Marriage is an FI institution even if you navigate it perfectly with RP alphatude.

  42. “Marriage is an FI institution . . .”

    And yet women believe it is a patriarchal institution.

    Marriage is an exchange. If you only see what you had to give up to enter a marriage you will see the institution as being something that came from the “other side.”

    If you only see what what you get, you will see marriage as your idea all along.

    The problem is that what we still call marriage isn’t marriage at all. It is a civil union in which men give everything and receive nothing. It is this civil union that we call marriage that is an FI institution.

    And that’s why men should not get “married,” even if children is their goal. They don’t get the children, which is what men get in the proper exchange.

  43. this is NYPost article linked on r/TheRedPill, and it seems like satire

    And then, between the ages of 35 and 40, I found myself lost in what I call the “Dating Bermuda Triangle.” The men I dated in my late 30s would tell me straight out that they didn’t date women my age because we were all “desperate to get married” and have children. Discounting a woman as being just an age, not a woman, is part of the modern single man’s dating dogma. … I never settled for a lesser love, and the man I end up with will know I’ve waited for him. Until then, I’m confidently single and happy in my 40s.

    Melanie Notkin is the author of “Otherhood: Modern Women Finding a New Kind of Happiness” and founder of Savvy Auntie.

    The hamster, sorry, my bad, the author holding out for mr. right is 47.

    http://nypost.com/2016/06/16/im-47-and-my-love-life-is-better-than-ever/

    1. @Redlight: NYpost article…
      “I’m 47….” 😂😂😂😂 – Fail!

      More men should adopt this stance….in Japan they call women above 26 ‘Christmas cake’ or ‘Kurisumasu Keeki’…
      It’s not your fault that you’re hypergamous…it’s neither our fault that time favours us, nor is it our fault that we are hard wired to prefer and choose younger women…

      Women cannot win against nature…they’ve had a good run…
      Time for things to be put right 😎

  44. @kfg,

    Nice addendum.

    “And that’s why men should not get “married,” even if children is their goal. They don’t get the children,”

    Bingo. As a single, childless man I still readily acknowledge that being a father is the very most significant event in life. The level of emotion, meaning and general awesomeness is something that I will never attain. I tip my hat to that highest experience. BUT, I won’t make that kind of emotional investment if there is about a 60-70% chance that I lose my daughter through government backed kidnapping and have to live knowing that my daughter is asleep with my ex’s new boyfriend down the hall. Not making that investment.

    Basically all that men get from marriage these days is the avoidance of shaming. Shame avoidance is not a true incentive though.

  45. “The men I dated in my late 30s would tell me straight out that they didn’t date women my age”

    Laughable bullshit lie right there and it’s self-evident. So guys ask a girl out just to let her know that they don’t want to go out with her. Whatever little rodent symbolizes ‘logic’ is Marsellus Wallace to her hamster’s gimp.

    It reminds me of Hillary’s recent quote where she claims that;

    “People come to my rallies all the time and tell me, ‘I like you. I support you in every way but I just don’t think I can vote for a woman, you know?'”

    Huge, outright, in-your-face, preschool-sandbox-caliber, big, windy lies are so commonplace these days.

  46. “Bingo. As a single, childless man I still readily acknowledge that being a father is the very most significant event in life. The level of emotion, meaning and general awesomeness is something that I will never attain. I tip my hat to that highest experience. BUT, I won’t make that kind of emotional investment if there is about a 60-70% chance that I lose my daughter through government backed kidnapping and have to live knowing that my daughter is asleep with my ex’s new boyfriend down the hall. Not making that investment. ” Kaminsky 18 Jun

    This is a sad but true fact that not many men know about. I sure as hell didn’t know about the risk of female induced alienation from my kids until my marriage took a turn towards the dark side. Child alienation was actually lobed at me as a weapon of manipulation during a verbal sparring match. The dark emotional depths to which a woman will go is just unreal. True to the pill, I held frame with indifference, but I sure as hell researched this subject of parental alienation, and was shocked to find out the real hell that a lot loving dads are put through by self-centered, materialistic women.

    In the USA, some states have 50/50 custody laws, which are a downside mitigation risk to having children, but the majority of states do not. Your ability to see your own children as a father is determined by sexist family courts and ultimately a solipsistic ex-wife. It’s sad that many women feelz that they are the only real care-giver for a child, so they must have complete control. It’s all about what makes them feel good and not the true welfare of the child. A kid purposefully deprived of a father is not being adequately loved or truly cared for by a “mother”. These women just don’t care about the suffering of the father either. To satisfy their own feeling, they will sacrifice the feelings of a child and father on the alter of self-centeredness.

    Yesterday was Fatherless Day (17 June), if you drove by a gov’t building in a major city you may have seen men standing in the streets with signs about equal parenting. Awareness is being raised by taking to the streets and on-line about the plight of alienated fathers. I am married (still), but I stood with them.

  47. The hamster, sorry, my bad, the author holding out for mr. right is 47.

    She’s just a JAP who for whatever reason missed the boat (probably didn’t like what was on offer at the time compared to who she was fucking), and now rationalizes about it. You can tell she was always good looking, even if most of her pictures now are useless because they are brushed glamour shots. She was the sort who was too good for what was offer, in her own mind, and fell through the cracks. Thing is, at her age, even if she is above average for her age, it’s gonna suck, relatively speaking, compared to what she could have bagged 20 years ago. She knows that, too, deep down, so she’s just rationalizing at this point.

  48. At the very least do not license your marriage with the government (the license is not what constitutes a marriage. It only constitutes your consent to include the government as a third party), be in a legal jurisdiction that isn’t community property, doesn’t recognize common law marriage and have your lawyer draw up contracts under the uniform commercial code that constitutes a civil partnership.

    The FI expansion program includes ensuring cash & prizes for all women everywhere, which means you can’t plan to have 22 years of continued legal protection from divorce rape. The recommendation to draw up contracts is very good, but make sure the woman is represented by her own lawyer, or the contracts could be thrown out by the FI courts.

  49. When thedeti says that ‘The solution (to older women being hypergamous bitches is for men) to increase their attraction, operate with necessary Dread, and if a relationship continues to yield less than satisfactory results, to walk away’, he admits (more or less) that there is no solution to modern female hypergamy besides either embracing the Female Imperative (Game) or avoidance.

    But, then he also agrees that the ‘Permission to have sex with other women’ is an unwinnable ‘lose-lose’ shit test unamenable to Game, leaving the avoidance of hypergamous women as the only option.

    Both options suck.

  50. FR:

    tl;dr I made great progress in frame control and in external game.

    Two great things happened last night. First, a couple of idiots tried to mess with my frame and failed utterly. Second, I did a dead-on cold read of a girl that she had been a cheerleader based on her dancing ability. She was into me but nobody really excited me last night. Mrs. Gamer complained of my “Chanel #5” fragrance last night, lol.

  51. @ recidivist:

    When I say that the solution is increasing attraction, using Dread and walking away from bad relationships, I mean to apply this not only to hypergamous older women married to men they’re not attracted to, but also to all women in general.

    That begs the question though of what the “solution” is intended to “solve”.

    After reviewing this further, the aim for men should be to improve their own lives first, without regard to whether that makes them attractive to women. Get fit, get hot, dress well, earn good money at a job you love, build a career, get social skills, get hobbies you like and that fit in with your job, personality and social acumen. Learn female nature and how to manage relationships. A sex life will be the byproduct of that good life you’ve built for yourself.

    Learning female nature and how to manage women and relationships will keep a man from “embracing the FI”. He will have sex when he wants, have relationships on his terms as well as hers, and get what he wants from his relationships.

    The problem for many, many men who get into relationships is that they do so not on their terms, but on the woman’s. She decides “it’s time”. She basically says to him “we’re exclusive, or NO SEX FOR YOU” (see Rollo’s last post about The Talk). She starts dictating relationship and sexual terms to him. She starts exercising more and more power over the relationship, using sex as both stick and carrot.

    And men allow this mainly because they think that’s just how it is supposed to be. They allow this because they believe the hype that women are just better at interpersonal relationships than men are; that women are just more moral, more nurturing, more caring, and just all around better human beings than men are. They allow this because they think that if they don’t conform to what the woman wants, then they will not get sex, or will have to work much harder to get sex.

  52. The core question at hand isnt women losing desire for sex with Betabux men.
    The question is whether they had genuine desire for them to begin with.

    Flip the script for a moment: how many of us would bed Meghan Trainor if she wrote a $50,000 check in exchange?
    She doesn’t rate high on the SMV scale for me – I safely presume it’s true for most others reading this- yet as the saying goes, money talks.

    I’d never be genuinely attracted to her regardless of how good the sex was.The moment I collect the deposit receipt for her check I’d lose her number.

    Evo psych ,hypergamy, all have their place in explaining female behavior. Sometimes it’s just plain old money that’s the motivator.
    Why should a wife put out, be nice to, or ever respect her husband when he’s legally her slave from that day forward?

    I view marriage the way the law and social customs today do : as the husband and all he owns becoming property to his wife in whatever means she sees fit.

  53. It’s not a binary set of options

    If you have an open or plural/poly relationship/marriage/commercial contract then knowing you can fuck others is a given

    If you are trapped in monoville, you will not be offered the opportunity to explore fucking other women if your SMV is considerable higher than hers and you are not at all dependent on her but she is dependent on you.

    “In any relationship, the person with the most power is the one who needs the other the least”

  54. @Blaximus
    “The upside is always not to get married. Then, there’s no issue whatsoever. Cake and eating it too is an option. It’s not honorable, but that is only up to the individual to decide what’s ” honorable “. In today’s society, honor doesn’t count for much, so I get that. Keeping your word is negotiable.”

    By “Cake and eating it too” do you mean having a main girl with girls on the side, or do you mean agreeing to monogamy and then cheating on that agreement? I read that as “cake and eating it too IS an option, it’s not honorable–” VS “cake and eating it TOO is an option (ie – changing subjects to being married and cheating)” so it sounds like you’re saying not getting married is “not honorable”, which is what my rant was based on.

    ’cause if you meant mono agreement + cheating, then I apologize and blame text on a screen not having tonal interpretation lol

    “I referred to pussy begging because that’s what I think it sounds like scrib is doing.”

    This part I have an issue with though. Why is scrib pussy-begging? Because he’s focused on trying to get laid? This comes off as just shaming him for something that a ton of guys, including lurkers here, are already probably struggling with (the guilt of feeling like they’re pussy-begging by pro-actively trying to get girls instead of just accepting their slot in life). Like, a Steve Hyde reading this just has his Blue Pill FI-beliefs that guys who want pussy are “pussy-beggars” and pats himself on the back for being an honorable good man sticking by his wife.

    @Blaximus @SJF
    “I resonate with that because of my four thousand other adventures in life besides pussy.”

    No one is saying you guys shouldn’t write anything or share your stories or that they don’t have any value for anyone.

    @redlight
    The thing is none of this:

    “So for H, if the marriage lasts 22+ years he gets:
    – children he raised with W
    – steady SMV -3 pussy
    – stability
    – decent quality of life (house/SUV)”

    requires a legal marriage contract that inherently locks you in and makes it difficult to leave/punish the girl (basically giving her law-enforced “hand” in the relationship, meaning you’ve taken a large hill and turned it into a mountain that’s even more difficult to climb, for no real benefit).

    Pre-nups are thrown out alllll the time and women almost always get custody of the kids by default.

    Like the point is that none of the benefits of marriage require marriage to have them. You will still get Father’s Day cards if you live in a house and drive an SUV with a steady SMV -3 pussy and raise kids with her.

    @kfg
    “But I know of no place in the “Western” world where your children can be yours. The state de facto claims ownership and default custody goes to the mother.”

    I think the way I would approach having kids would be, as cynical as it sounds, to keep track of aaaaanything from day one that would help me win a custody battle 10 or so years later if she decides to Eat Pray Love because now we have Future Tinder and she has literally the entire world of men hitting on her on her 3d floating Tinder monitor that follows her face around all day lol Like I would be putting money away and keeping track of anything that I could use in court just incase I need to win that custody battle down the road. VS the idealism of the past where “true love” would last forever and putting a ring on her finger would mean she’ll love me and never cheat or stray and we’ll grow old together etc

    @Max From Australia
    “This same thing happened to me. Got married at 24 and had sex maybe 20 times in 20 years. Turned me into a sad depressed overwieght alco and kicked me out last october. It took me 9 days to find a 26 yo girlfriend with the Red Pill. 9 Fucking days!!!!”

    lol props on turning things around dude.

    @hank holiday
    “I’m also picking up on the fact that I am fairly extroverted. I was raised to be an introvert though. I remember seeing a video tape from when I was 5 and would not shut the fuck up lol. But as I aged I got quiter. This was from my family.”

    I would have pegged you as an extrovert just from your Field Reports. That’s part of why you’re doing WAY more in your FRs than most guys when they start out. Most guys will go to the venues you go to and just sit there with a pint for an hour not talking to anyone then go home feeling disappointed in themselves, but you’re jumping into random groups of people and having fun. Stick to this stuff and you’ll go far, especially when you eventually get yourself into a city with more girls you actually want lol

    This goes back to what I say about introverts though:

    “I find a lot of “introverts” are just guys hiding behind a socially acceptable label and use that label as an excuse to avoid leaving their comfort zone, usually because they’re either scared to let loose more or they simply don’t understand how to. People who meet me now assume I’m an extrovert, but I used to consider myself an introvert before I got into game. What’s closer to reality is that we all have extro/intro sides to us and game is just about learning to embrace and express the extro side in certain environments/situations.

    I believe there are VERY few self-identifying “introverts” who CAN’T be more extroverted given the proper tools/guidance and motivation. Like I’ve said before, if you push yourself outside your comfort zone and go out for a year straight, opening 10 sets a night, getting laid here and there, making new friends, etc, and after all that you decide you still prefer to be alone with a good book or whatever, then you’re probably naturally an introvert. If you haven’t pushed those boundaries and you’ve declared yourself an introvert without having tested your extrovert side, you are just hiding behind a label and making excuses for not taking action.”

    And elsewhere I’ve talked about how most of us start out extremely extroverted, it’s pretty rare to find a baby who doesn’t make a fuss when they want something. A LOT of guys who think they’re “introverts”, if they think back to when they were little kids, before social conditioning got ahold of them, would remember being pretty outgoing and chatty with other kids at school or around the neighborhood etc But society puts chains around us with social conditioning, just like your parents did and forces us into boxes and labels. We get to a certain age in school where suddenly everyone is competing for status and comparing themselves to the looks/money matter FI-based value system and suddenly Suzy isn’t just some dumb girl, she’s a goddess you have a one-itis crush on, and suddenly you aren’t just this fun outgoing kid you’re this guy who’s “not good enough” physically (height, muscles, facial aesthetics, etc), mentally, financially (Billy’s parents bought him that cool looking car, I have to still ride my bike to school), etc and you start feeling like you don’t DESERVE to be expressive or DESERVE to interact with everyone the way you used to…the same kid that would’ve been cool with you in grade 3 is a dick if you try to befriend him now because he’s ALSO wrapped up in the status rat race (and you may not even TRY to befriend him because you “know your place” as one of the uncool kids), etc

    So a lot of game is just the process of unwrapping all those chains and letting yourself act like you’re 5 years old again, back when you didn’t give a shit about any of that stuff. And suddenly all these introverts, because they’re actually going out infield and pushing their comfort zones like we make them, find out they either AREN’T actually that introverted, or that they ARE but that it’s nowhere NEAR as debilitating as they let it be for so many years.

    Like I’m legitimately an introvert, socializing is draining to me and if I’m around people where I’m forced to engage them for too long I need to escape and have some Me-time to relax and recharge. Whereas my legitimately extroverted buddies CRAVE social interaction and GAIN energy from it and go crazy if they have to sit around by themselves all day, they’re always seeking more interactions while I’m like “ehh I’m just gonna chill on this couch today, you go ahead without me” lol

    But it’s not debilitating at all, it just means I have to give myself some recharge time now and then and that I have to make a bit of an extra effort to get outside of my head and be expressive when I go out. No big deal, nothing that would keep a guy from learning to game. That’s why I don’t let guys get away with the introversion excuse. Like I say, go out and follow the formula and actually engage a shitload of people for a year and THEN tell me whether you’re actually introverted or not, and how much that even MATTERS now that you’ve pushed yourself. But most guys will just hide behind the label because it’s so much more comfortable to stay in your comfort zone.

    “Becomeing VERY aware of my mental state and how certain things affect it.”

    Most guys will never be self-aware enough to even make this connection lol

    “Then I go to the mall in the bad city, feel like shit, and afterwards get in this very negative mindset and think of all the bad things going on in my life.”

    Like Tyler says: Memory is state-accessed. When you’re in a good state, all you remember and think about are the good things and your visions of the outcome are all optimistic and happy. When you’re in a bad state, your brain will flood you with a bunch of OTHER bad negative memories and visions of negative outcomes. So it’s hard to pull out of that negative spiral because your brain doesn’t WANT to think about positive stuff. Something like leaving the venue for a different venue can help, or having a good interaction, or a wingman buddy to pump your state, or watching a bunch of funny videos on the internet, or taking a nap, or splashing cold water on your face, and basically finding some other way to shut your brain off and reset.

    @kaminsky
    “but how a redpill man outpaces his wife over the years in terms of SMV doesn’t get much play.”

    I’d argue that it’s partly because the Manosphere doesn’t cover a lot of actual pickup stuff lol I mean, the married guys will take offense to this but to me ugly is ugly. I’ll hear rants about how “my wife’s wrinkled hands are sexy to me because those hands passed my newborn son to me” and that’s cool if that’s your thing, but like, to me I just see wrinkled ugly hands lol

    “A 10 who marries and has kids will be a 6 to her alpha husband after a few years. She’ll be a 10 to slobbering betas but a 6 to her alpha just due to sharing a bathroom, kids and the general absence of novelty.”

    lol this has been my experience. I’ve never been with a girl who’s gotten HOTTER over time, or stayed as hot as she was on our first few dates. The more I get to know her, the more I see her at her worst (looking dumpy, bad moods, seeing flaws (internally and externally) that other girls probably ALSO have, but I don’t see them on THOSE girls yet so compared to them she’s losing value) and the more routine/boring the sex gets (ya you should mix it up in bed, but most people have a few things they love that get them off and either aren’t into the rest or are actively against the rest).

    Maybe it’s a generational thing, like the ability to see 5000 different porn chicks in a night on the internet since my teens makes it harder to settle for the same aging vagina VS guys raised in a previous generation…or maybe I’m just an outlier with it (I fully admit that I’m more shallow than most guys (or at least more shallow than most guys will admit to being lol))

    No idea, but to me locking down to one vag means I’m just going to end up fucking an old wrinkly vag at some point. If I’m like, 45+ and settle with a 21yo, maybe my dick will stop working before I have to worry about her looks.

    @kfg
    “If you only see what you had to give up to enter a marriage you will see the institution as being something that came from the “other side.””

    And the goal of the FI is to keep men in the dark about what they’ll be giving up. All of my buddies who are in our 30s now are fucking mindblown at how many young girls are throwing pussy at them. No one told us that was going to happen lol We all just assumed that because in our early 20s girls gave no fucks about us, it would just get worse as we hit our 30s, so we better try to settle down before then or we’d be alone forever etc. Those of us who are still single (or don’t mind cheating) are slaying it now, and the ones who fully settled are either frustrated as fuck that they can’t do anything with all the attention, or keep themselves locked up away from other girls to stay forever oblivious to knowing they could trade their aging bitchy let-herself-go girl in for a new one tomorrow.

    @pinelero
    “I sure as hell didn’t know about the risk of female induced alienation from my kids until my marriage took a turn towards the dark side. Child alienation was actually lobed at me as a weapon of manipulation during a verbal sparring match. The dark emotional depths to which a woman will go is just unreal”

    The thing is in the past they would probably be shamed for this kind of thing. Like society would probably judge them for it…being a divorced woman and single mom wasn’t a “cool” thing to be lol But now they’re bombarded with rewards, cash and prizes, validation, attention, support, etc etc for it. They’re literally INCENTIVIZED to divorce-rape you and turn the kids against you and everything in the law helps them DO it (one simple little “tell the nice police officer about how daddy likes to give you baths” lie and NO ONE is taking your side lol).

    Like I don’t know if the guys in successful marriages really GET how bad it’s gotten out there. They’re married to women that were raised in an earlier time…a lot of this has literally been the last 10 years, since Facebook/smartphones. Like even just doing pickup in bars I’ve seen things change as technology gave women insane abundance and feminism pushed the narrative that being in LTRs was lame and they should eat pray love and the zillions of divorce-rape experiences they see their friends and family and random internet girls have, how cool being a single mom is, how cool having multiple guys on the go is, the sugar daddy/baby culture and how easy it is, how many guys they have offering them the world for nothing on their social media, how their friends/family are set for life off alimony/child support, their friends/family always get the kids, etc

    It’s not just that we don’t know how to handle women, it’s that we’re handling women who are being MASSIVELY incentivized to blow things up. It’s not just trying to move a flask of nitro-glycerine with a girl, it’s trying to move it while she’s endlessly incentivized to SHAKE that flask as hard as she can.

    We’re not “hating on women”. We’re just addressing the realities of the current culture and how incentivization has changed and ramped things up and the effects that’s had on women in 2016 VS 15+ years ago when you guys got married to girls born and raised in a different culture.

    “In the USA, some states have 50/50 custody laws, which are a downside mitigation risk to having children, but the majority of states do not”

    I’m not a lawyer, but I’d guess that one simple lie about daddy being physically/sexually abusive and that 50/50 won’t mean shit.

    @thedeti
    “The problem for many, many men who get into relationships is that they do so not on their terms, but on the woman’s. She decides “it’s time”. She basically says to him “we’re exclusive, or NO SEX FOR YOU” (see Rollo’s last post about The Talk)”

    For example: Softek. lol

    @SD
    “The core question at hand isnt women losing desire for sex with Betabux men.”

    It’s also important to note that a lot of Alpha dudes can turn INTO Beta chodes in an LTR, because a lot of them are under FI-conditioning too. Especially if they have daughters and end up in a house full of estrogen lol Like I say, it’s theoretically possible that Steve Hyde was, or gave the impression he was, an Alpha fuck at some point and she had genuine desire for him, but he’s just lost it over the years. Never think being Alpha now makes you immune to Beta’ization.

    @redlight
    “In any relationship, the person with the most power is the one who needs the other the least”

    Right, the problem is marriage is legally putting yourself into a situation where you need her to stay in the relationship (or you get divorce-raped) more than she needs to stay in the relationship (’cause she’ll get cash ‘n prizes). There’s only downsides to legal marriage in 2016.

  55. @recidivist

    Steve Hyde had an option that he was ignorant of. He should have been working on bettering himself instead of waiting for basic human decency from Saira.

    He systematically allowed Saira to employ her primordial sexual strategy ( get a beta provider, get children, instinctively push Steve away from her by making him subservient and therefore unattractive, loose sexual attraction for him). He systematically failed in his masculine sexual strategy. He became controlled and betatized because of her manipulations and then she was disgusted by him.

    Game is not “embracing the Female Imperative”, it is showing/demonstrating masculine alpha traits that an old hag like Saira would want to fuck. He would be embracing the Masculine Imperative and alpha. He demonstrates no attributes of alpha fuckability.

    And excerpt from Franco’s “Manual of Seduction”:

    (Admittedly this is just reiterating everything Rollo has said in different words. The reason I cut and paste it is because it is clear and concise. And reponds to recidivist’s comment):

    “To maintain a woman’s excitation and sexual desire on a constantly high level, you need to never give the woman the sureness of being exclusively her man!”

    The instincts and the mental frames you will need to fight against are:

    a. The subservient mental frame, which is enemy number one of seduction.

    b. The instinct to protect the woman. – From what for Christ’s sake?

    c. Your sexual desire. The stronger your sexual desire is, the more difficult you will find it to fight against the subservient mental state. On the contrary, you need to be conscious about the fact that the more you are sexually active, the more you will need to be careful not to fall into the trap of her PNP. Before you aim your guns at me I say: I don’t mean you should not have sex. I mean you need only to be aware of this.

    d. The mechanism of addiction in the case the woman has already succeeded in getting you attached by using her PNP and you are already subservient toward her. This is an area where this book can help certain husbands and boyfriends a lot. The ideal situation is one in which you never remain in that state of addiction to her and are still able to love her and get love from her. Once you are in the subservient mental state, however, it is very difficult to get out of it.

    (Ed. The PNP mechanism is the addiction cycle of positive, negative, postitive reinforcement. The “hide-the-vagina routine”.)

    The subservient frame and the PNP- mechanism:

    The PNP mechanism is a behavioral psychological and biological mechanism creating addiction. To be able to have a man connected to her for a time long enough for procreation and for her children to reach independence a woman subconsciously uses the PNP mechanism and puts the man – without his noticing it – in a mental state called the subservient mental state. Nature has predisposed the man to fall into woman’s PNP mechanism giving him a strong instinct of protection toward the woman along with a formidable sexual instinct.

    This instinct for protection protects life, but in many males – let’s admit it: the majority of males – reaches such limits that it puts the man in a state of psychological dependence upon and enslavement by the woman, which is the subservient mental state. All men should be kept by law from getting married or involved in a long-term relationship before they become expert seducers and have laid at least 50 women!

    When a man acts under the influence of the subservient mental state, he speaks and acts in the subservient mental frame, which we will learn to recognize and eliminate with the help of this book.

    This frame is one of the major reasons for failure in your attempts to seduce a woman and the basis for a major loss of sexual interest on the part of the woman in a marriage or a long-term relationship.

    When a woman succeeds in putting a man into that state two things happen:

    A. The woman slowly looses her sexual interest for that man.

    B. She starts to despise that man and looses respect for him. As you all understand, it is impossible to love a man whom you despise.

    This process is the cause of many divorces and infidelities in marriage. The process can be very fast – hours, days – or slower: the duration of a marriage, but it happens anyway, without mercy and with a mathematical precision.

    We can define the subservient mental state like this:

    “The subservient frame is any word, action and omission by which a man puts himself in a humiliating position, displays to the woman that he cannot live without her, is in position of submission to her with the purpose of obtaining from her attention and sex. It is any word, action and omission, by which a man gives the woman the possibility of putting him down psychologically, acting against his interests, lacking respect for him.”

    The subservient state is like a green light, telling the woman that she has reached her evolutionary purpose: the man is now hers and she owns him. But there is a big problem in this: it is also like a signal telling her “He is not a real man anymore.” Ironic: the same mechanism for making her sure to possess a man with the best genes, a companion and a father for her children has her loosing her sexual interest for her man. Many men “sense” at that point “something strange” and start to do stupid things like drinking alcohol or gambling or staying out of the home all the time in order to get themselves back into the Alpha state but it is already too late.

    In fact how could a woman respect anymore a man who lets her put him from the first very moment into such a miserable state? How could a woman respect a man who gives up his dignity for sex and affection? Impossible!

  56. @YaReally

    I totally endorse your explanation of introversion. I say this for the ego-invested doubters out there: I totally reconditioned myself through embracing game in the last five years to get out and enjoy socializing, and I know when I need to be alone to recharge my batteries. Lots of football tailgaters, country club parties, and lots and lots of big neighborhood parties with highly attractive couples–I used to loathe them, now I don’t fail to really enjoy them. Being enthusiastic about Game was a key component to this turn-around.

    Indeed a man pushing his comfort zones is the key to being more successful.

    “I’ve never been with a girl who’s gotten HOTTER over time, or stayed as hot as she was on our first few dates…

    Maybe it’s a generational thing…

    No idea, but to me locking down to one vag means I’m just going to end up fucking an old wrinkly vag at some point….”

    Girls do lose their hotness over time. A few don’t. I would marry mine all over again and I would kick myself if I didn’t take the path I did (no this is not a universal truth, but it is something to be aware of: when you see a good path, you might want to take it. When there is a hot chick that might be good you might want to commit. Even if you maintain many simultaneous inter-sexual relationships (MLTR = Multiple Long Term Relationships) without having to tell a single lie and in an extremely satisfactory way, both for you and for the women involved)

    Rollo said it many times before (and in my case also) it is dependent on the woman not letting her SMV slip. It seems paradoxical, but a man does have some degree of control (through Game) at motivating his LTR to not let her SMV slip. But most of it comes from the woman herself being motivated to not slip. And you can bet your ass that is a generational thing.

  57. @The Awakened One
    Here’s the video that article is about:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbt9yK2DFrg

    “Yareally would be pleased with the comment section”

    I really am. It sounds dumb, but for the guys who haven’t followed any of this stuff until recently, you gotta understand that a comment section like that didn’t exist 10+ years ago. No one was talking about this shit out loud in public. Now almost any article about these subjects, the comment sections are swarmed with MRA/MGTOW/Red Pill/PUA/etc comments and slowly waking more and more men up. It’s glorious to see. That’s why as much as Elam seems like a tool and the MRA is kind of whiny, I still give them props for helping push that shit into the mainstream. PUAs were happy just doing our own thing and the Manosphere tends to just be a circle-jerk that keeps to itself in a corner somewhere, but the MRAs were the first group I saw actively pushing this stuff front and center to the “normies”. Even if they failed here and there, it all added up to help make a comment section like that one exist and that shit brings a tear to my eye.

    @SJF
    “and I know when I need to be alone to recharge my batteries.”

    I think a lot of men who need to recharge their batteries don’t realize that’s even a thing (or think it’s BAD and anti-social and rude etc), so they follow society’s blueprint of moving in with their girl to some little apartment or tiny house but find out they never get any downtime from having to be “on” and social (unless they happen to get a very introverted woman). Like I couldn’t live with a girl unless I had bare minimum my own private office/man-cave I could go to to just not socialize lol Ideally a separate bachelor pad apartment so I can easily perform Soft Nexts etc in comfort. But even then I prefer having my own place entirely so I can go a few days without socializing if I feel like it, no questions asked, no one knocking on the door to come to dinner, etc It sounds like you go off into the woods or whatever when you need your recharge time but I think a lot of guys don’t even realize they need that stuff.

    But that’s just me and something I’ll have to personally account for if I decide to start a family someday and how to make that work with kids running around. I have a buddy who’s similar to me who WANTS to just be a weekend dad lol That’s his ideal arrangement. If I had a kid I’d want to be a 24/7 dad though so that doesn’t work for me. My super extroverted buddies LOVE having someone around them 24/7 and do just fine living with girls and could probably live in a Full House situation and be perfectly happy, whereas I would go insane.

    “When there is a hot chick that might be good you might want to commit.”

    Why not just keep her as a Primary LTR and have kids with her while having other girls on the side (so that as she’s losing her looks I still get to fuck girls who haven’t lol)?

    “Even if you maintain many simultaneous inter-sexual relationships (MLTR = Multiple Long Term Relationships) without having to tell a single lie and in an extremely satisfactory way, both for you and for the women involved”

    This sounds like an excellent situation.

    “it is dependent on the woman not letting her SMV slip”

    She can’t fight Mother Nature lol

    https://vanityvintageallure.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/bardot-then-today.jpg

    The notion of “some women don’t lose their hotness” is like, fluff-talk. She can workout like crazy and live a healthy lifestyle and everything but her body is still going to age and she’s always going to look worse than she did 10 years ago.

    Now whether that’s an ISSUE for the guy, is a different story. I’d accept a statement like “some men don’t view their aging wife as less hot regardless of how wrinkled etc she gets”, but saying some women don’t lose their hotness/SMV just isn’t reality.

  58. @Playdontpay

    “…I was refused Trt as my levels were “normal” so I took the matter into my own hands.
    Now I keep my level around 1300/1400 and I have never felt better….”

    When was the last time you had a PSA?
    Are you over 50? Do you know what Testosterone will do (besides being able to do “3 or 4 times a night”?

  59. “She can’t fight Mother Nature”

    And God created woman. Then he created a wall for her to slam into. Bardot must like it, because she appears to have made several trips.

  60. Ok, I’ll cop to: I don’t view my aging wife as less hot regardless of how wrinkled, etc. she gets.

    Mostly because she keeps herself up.

    I have to say she has looked in the mirror this past year and I sense of gasp of dread and slightly less self-esteem. But she’s had an excess of beauty and self-esteem all along. Lol, so that works in my favor.

    I see a lot of girls in their underwear ever day and what you say is true about mother nature, but a small number of them

    Young Women Offer You a Special Energy

    In general, youth in a woman bespeaks radiant, unobstructed, and re- freshing feminine energy. A young woman tends to be less compromised by masculine layers of functional protection built up over years of need. Traditionally, young women were understood to offer a man a particu- larly rejuvenative quality of energy. Older women may maintain, or even increase, the freshness and radiance of their energy, but it is rare.

    On the other hand, I think I’ll quote some more Deida (partly to piss of Scribbler, because he is sharper when he is pissed and partly to affirm why my wife’s wrinkles don’t matter as much-at least the ones I can’t erase with free Botox):

    And spare me the lecture, I’m not justifying being with older women or saying you shouldn’t stick with younger women. This is just why I can abide by a decent looking and strong woman. Why I can use game to not get betatized. The following is a spiritual, not practical guide. That is why is sounds gay and new-agey. TWSM book after all a spiritual guide to mastering the challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire.

    Allow Older Women Their Magic

    Men should support older women in the their wisdom, power, and intuitive and healing capacities. Men should not degrade older women by demanding or desiring them to be like young women. There should be no such comparison. Each age of woman has its own value, and the transition from superficial shine to deep radiance is inevitable.

    For many reasons, from biological to yogic, you are probably more sexually attracted to young women than older ones. Walking down the beach or street, your head is more likely to turn for a twenty year old woman than a sixty year old. This is quite natural.

    But there is more to feminine energy than this. Youthful sexual attractiveness is a temporary aspect of a much deeper and more fundamental quality of feminine energy: radiance. Feminine radiance is not only the flush of a young woman’s cheeks or the glow of her skin, but is the shine of life force itself. A woman’s true radiance reveals the degree to which she is open, trusting, connected, and loving. Her capacity to love, in turn, allows her body to be moved by the power of life force itself. Herein lies the true nature of feminine radiance and power, far beyond the simple sexiness of a naive young woman.

    When a woman is young, her body more easily conducts life force, and so she appears more radiant, in general, than an older woman. But even amongst young women there are those who are pretty just on the outside, and those whose beauty springs from their depths. As a woman ages, her skin begins to lose its youthful capacity to conduct life force. What remains obvious of her feminine radiance is primarily her beauty of depth.

    In fact, it is this deep beauty that you find most attractive even in young women. There is a difference between your knee-jerk response to a cute babe and the open-hearted awe and mindless swoon you feel in the company of a woman who moves, breathes, smiles, and shines radiant feminine energy like a goddess. When looking into such a woman’s eyes, you feel an almost breathtaking depth of compassion, love, and mystery. This deep feminine beauty or radiance need not be diminished by age. Actually, it can be magnified, deepened, and glorified.

    If you are disconnected from your deep masculine core of purpose and consciousness, then you will also be disconnected from a woman’s depth. You will see only skin deep, and you will be attracted to the superficial display of a woman’s radiance, which often disappears with the passing of youth. You will inadvertently dishonor the true and deep forms of feminine radiance, and so contribute to the social cult of youth, wherein women try to look and behave younger—and more superficial—than they truly are, denying the power and radiance springing from their depths.

    The natural sexiness of a young woman will always give you energy. You never need to deny this. But the awesome beauty and radiant ease of a deep woman can stop your mind, widen your heart, and suspend your body in the mystery of feminine grace, all in an instant, with a single gaze or touch, regardless of her body’s age. And in relationship with such a woman, there are no bounds to the rapture which may resonate through your union. Boundless feminine love-radiance and temporary physical sexiness are both blessings; you must decide, moment by moment, and year by year, which qualities you will invoke and venerate with your attention, praise, and union.

    As a woman grows older with wisdom, her “psychic weight” increases. She becomes a “bigger” woman, able to influence her surroundings with stronger magic than a less developed woman. She is able to read the signs of nature with great accuracy, as well as sway events with almost shocking reign. A superior man honors and appreciates this kind of magic, and knows that it complements his masculine style of accomplishment.

    An older woman will also tolerate less of your bullshit than a younger woman. Although this might be one of your reasons for preferring younger women, you must choose your priority. If you find yourself attracted to younger women, be careful that you aren’t trying to find an easy relationship with a woman who will let you slide. If your purpose is to become ever more free of your self-burdens and give your true gift to the world, then a spiritually mature woman—who won’t let you slather in your comfy habits of security and distraction—may be an excellent ally for your journey.

    The last paragraph fits my narrative. She doesn’t have a wrinkly vagina, passes the boner test and has strong magic. I actually don’t find stronger magic in the thousands of women I meet every year. I do find a handful that I’d like to fuck with no repercussions, but I know the magic would be ephemeral.

    One thing I also had (as a thought that popped into my mind about this Steve and Saira thing), was that when I look at my children in their twenties and see them all raised up well, they are strong, good looking, and relatively confident and eager to engage in life outside of themselves it reflects on both their parents. In other words, my wife can look at them and and see my half of the genes as SJF alpha and not so much Steve Hyde beta. And I look at them and see the maternal genes and strength that they were brought up with. And that makes my wife look better as seen by my eyes.

    I’m sure Rollo Tomassi has had the same feeling lately.

    I’m not so sure Steve Hyde will make it through triage. (No offense to anyone with this picture: It’s about his narrative up to this point.)

    https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/ad70130537saira-khan-with-h.jpg

  61. I see this a little differently. I think what she’s experiencing is the start of menopause.. her estrogen levels are crashing and her libido is *naturally* crashing with it.

    I had this really horrifying, eye opening experience when I missed two birth control pills in a critical part of my cycle… about a week afterwards I started having these awful symptoms, ended up calling my doctor who explained to me that what I was experiencing was just really low estrogen, just like in menopause.

    Anyways, what was horrifying about this menopause-preview is that I basically stopped having romantic feelings for my husband. I was both uninterested in sex AND uninterested in connecting with him emotionally.

    This is basically the opposite of who I am normally. I don’t care what’s going on in my life, sex is a top priority for me. Normally, even when i’m not physically in the mood necessarily, it’s still really important to me that we maintain that sexual bond.

    But I did not feel that way at all when my estrogen was scraping rock bottom. And it was really, really awful and disturbing, and frankly terrifying to know that in about two decades I’m going to feel this way for a good percentage of a ten year period.

  62. Just to add, that experience did give me some pause in how I approach the topic of hypergamy.

    As in, I can certainly see my own hypergamous behavior and acknowledge that I am hardwired this way, but what I realized from having the hormonal makeup of a 50 year old a few weeks is that a lot of the things I consider my personality and my values (making sex a priority, being really into sex, being really into my marriage, wanting my husband’s attention) are really mostly young woman hormones.

    Young women are biologically hypergamous but ALSO biologically conditioned to bond with and maintain their families, including their husbands. So there’s a tension there.

  63. @YaReally

    No one is saying you guys shouldn’t write anything or share your stories or that they don’t have any value for anyone.

    Actually scrib was dissing Blax’s stories. You swallowed a big load with this boner, lol.

  64. @YaReally

    It’s also important to note that a lot of Alpha dudes can turn INTO Beta chodes in an LTR

    +1

    Even getting in a depression will cause women to see you as a weak beta.

  65. @ YaReally

    ” @Blaximus
    “The upside is always not to get married. Then, there’s no issue whatsoever. Cake and eating it too is an option. It’s not honorable, but that is only up to the individual to decide what’s ” honorable “. In today’s society, honor doesn’t count for much, so I get that. Keeping your word is negotiable.”

    By “Cake and eating it too” do you mean having a main girl with girls on the side, or do you mean agreeing to monogamy and then cheating on that agreement? I read that as “cake and eating it too IS an option, it’s not honorable–” VS “cake and eating it TOO is an option (ie – changing subjects to being married and cheating)” so it sounds like you’re saying not getting married is “not honorable”, which is what my rant was based on.

    ’cause if you meant mono agreement + cheating, then I apologize and blame text on a screen not having tonal interpretation lol

    What I was expressing to Andy was that is a man is married or in a commited LTR, for lack of a better description, then Having your Cake and eating it to is an option, but it’s not honorable.

    I don’t get why I kept getting misunderstood on this simple point. I even tried to explain that a man can do whatever he likes wrt to sex and marriages and cheating or not choosing to get married. I explained my position 5 different ways, but it kept being taken as ” Marriage is the way, the truth, and the light and anything else is dishonorable : or something.

    That’s why I tried to walk away from the subject because only SJF seemed to get what I was saying.

    Even Andy was having problems grasping what I was trying to say because there seems to be a disconnect if a married guy tries to explain that marriage can work under the proper condition, but most men can’t or won’t create the atmosphere required, hence THEY SHOULD NOT GET MARRIED.

    Lol, then the conversation kept devolving into fear of loss or some kind of acceptance of a lesser lifestyle or all kinds of crazy stuff.

    Even after stating that ” I’m not the marriage police..” my position seemed hopelessly lost and misunderstood. So I dropped it until scrib chimed in telling me how much shit I was full of.

    “I referred to pussy begging because that’s what I think it sounds like scrib is doing.”

    This part I have an issue with though. Why is scrib pussy-begging? Because he’s focused on trying to get laid? This comes off as just shaming him for something that a ton of guys, including lurkers here, are already probably struggling with (the guilt of feeling like they’re pussy-begging by pro-actively trying to get girls instead of just accepting their slot in life). Like, a Steve Hyde reading this just has his Blue Pill FI-beliefs that guys who want pussy are “pussy-beggars” and pats himself on the back for being an honorable good man sticking by his wife.

    FI shaming notwithstanding ( because that’s not my thing at all ), judging by how scrib is positioning himself and his new fangled outlook, it does appear to me that he is willing to engage in pussy begging.

    My definition of pussy begging has nothing to do with any FI or jezzabell type harping or shaming, but it’s my bad for not getting that fems use that terminology to try and shame pua’s in some fashion. That wasn’t my intent in using that term.

    I’m not talking about guys getting laid. I’d advocated a million times that I want guys to get as much sex as humanly possible. I do not know how I can stress that any more than I already have. My position is being twisted.

    But….

    As far as scrib is concerned, and he is the one my comment was directed at solely, His pronouncements about men fooling themselves about the hot, 24 year old pussy, over and over and over and over again, is showing me that he has a deadly mindset concerning the subject. The whole obsession thing. I don’t advocate for men becoming obsessed with women, ever. It’s a bad move.

    Example: he comes in saying stuff like…

    ” You married guys, I get it. You are scared to lose all your shit and your family, we get it. You can all stop yelping about how you are self-defined men and how monogamy is a-okay with you. Nope, you simply did the math and realized that strange pussy ain’t worth the freight, I get it.

    I just hope none of you – including Rollo – have a fall from grace and get ill, or lose your businesses and social standing and physical attributes. I hope you never have to find out how women can and will turn on your like rabid hyenas and laugh at your suffering. Lovers, sisters, daughters, friends – all will abandon you like a sinking ship. I know, it happened to me. Thankfully, I’ve recovered.

    But I’ll never count on a woman to be there for me for anything other than her own selfish needs again. Which is fine, now that I know, I get to get what I want to. Which is to sink my dick into as much fine pussy as I can before I check out. Of course, all the rest of you are free to do as you please, but do yourselves a favor, stop bullshitting yourselves. It’s transparent to many of us here what you are up to and you look quite foolish preening about such nonsense here of all places.”

    ” Was rewarded with an HB8 reaching out to me today…” ( rewarded? )

    ” @SJF and Blax – Bullfucking shit. To all of it. And I wasn’t negative, I was merely being honest about how I see things….”

    ” @Blax – Frankly I think much of what you say is given by some kind of egoic compensation mechanism and denial, but I enjoy reading it. I just don’t buy much of it. You may not like that, but as they say, I’m just keeping it real. That doesn’t mean I don’t accept that you are content with the tradeoffs you make, but you are merely weighing risks and rewards. Otherwise, why do you game women, playing “catch and release” as you do with them? Why do you enjoy flirting with women at all? I mean, you are beyond needing all that shit or wanting it, right? BULLSHIT. ”

    ” You may choose not to, but you are denying yourself. You may be content and disciplined, but if you guys could have a 24yo dime without any consequences, you’d be fucking the shit out of her in a flash.”

    ” She’s at the apex of our social order…” ( re: Emily )

    ” As I’ve become more of a spectator here, the kind of incessant posing going on is becoming quite apparent. It’s as though this comment section exists purely for ego validation and LARPing for some. There is no issue certain folks here don’t weigh in on with complete knowledge and in depth, 100% direction, nonstop. There is no argument they won’t continue. There is no point where they stop and say, “Hey, maybe I’m just being a loudmouthed asshole?” ”

    ” @ Blax- Right, because a man who’s accepted the social conditioning and training his entire life which has fed to him BY WOMEN to be a good man, and to be an equalist is also accountable for that behavior drying up his wife’s pussy.

    Wow, am I getting tired of the Super-Blax stuff…”

    Okay, dude has issues, but non of them can be solved by young pussy.

    As you say we’re all names on a screen, but if the end game here is to help other men, scrib’s bullshit snipping doesn’t help the cause.

    I get that he has an opinion, but I don’t have to allow him to try and redifine me on his shaky, apparently confused terms.

    That shit got tedious. All of his talk about ego and shit, while basing ( seemingly ) his self worth on young women.

    You might disagree but I can only speak for myself – that is weak, wrong headed thinking.

    YES, by all means go and have sex with any kind of women that one would like. I cosign +1000. But a man’s choices concerning sex don’t have anything to do with me. I don’t rag on guys because they choose not to get married, I SUPPORT THEIR DECISIONS.

    Scrib has issues, but so do many people. I understand and support him, but if he wants to attack without me attacking him, I’ll be happy to call him out on it, not to be an INTERNET TOUGH GUY, but to maybe get him to slow down his racing brain and take an inward look at where his thoughts are heading.

    Imo, women do not define men. Ever.

    Imo, liking young women is perfectly fine. Pedestalizing ANY women at any time is dangerous and puts a man at risk of getting hurt, heartbroken and depressed.

    Say it with me for the 10,000th time : They are just girls. no magical unicorn, princesses, apex’s of society, or reward givers. Ever.

    So like I said, without regard to any other machinations other than my own, scrib sounds like he is a prime candidate for begging for ( hot, young ) pussy because his PERSPECTIVE is incorrect. Reward?? Nah, I can’t cosign that mode of thinking ever.

  66. @SJF
    “Ok, I’ll cop to: I don’t view my aging wife as less hot regardless of how wrinkled, etc. she gets.”

    See that’s an HONEST statement. That’s something that I’m cool with. I’m even cool with the gay flowery “she has magic energy” fluff and the whole “her wrinkled old hands are sexy to me because she handed me my newborn son with them” stuff.

    As long as it’s clear that these aren’t magic NAWALT unicorns that just defy mother nature and are incredible HB10s at age 45+.

    Because the programming a lot of guys get from the FI is that love conquers all and your wife will always be beautiful to you no matter what bla bla and those guys don’t date a lot of girls so they don’t get past the New Relationship Energy stage very often and they find one that seems cool and settle into marriage with her, expecting it to be like this NRE stage forever.

    Then they wake up and their wife is wrinkled and old and they think “…I’m really not sexually attracted to her anymore.” but they can’t TELL anyone that or they’d be fucking MONSTERS by society’s view. They’ve got some cute young hottie at work flirting with them but they locked down into marriage with a woman their age because they thought “well not ALL women hit the wall, some of these guys are dating 60 year old HB10s!!” ’cause they really really really wanna believe that’s possible.

    But like, let’s be honest for their sake. Same with the kids thing where everyone fluffs up the flowery “sure you may think you don’t want kids or want to be a dad but when you first hold your son and he squeezes your finger THEN you’ll see the magic special wonder of it all”…meanwhile you go on reddit in a “tell us the truth about what it was like” thread and see a dozen guys talking about how “ya it’s not really that special, it kind of sucks. I thought there’d be some magic moment but there wasn’t and really having a kid is pretty inconvenient and I’ve had to put aside a lot of my dreams for it, but I guess being a father is cool at times, there are good moments, it’s just not like the movies say”.

    I’m sure there are guys who absolutely think their wife is an HB10 for life, and there are definitely guys who have that magic connection moment with their kid just like the movies and it’s all super wonderful.

    But let’s deal with the harsh realities. ’cause some guys may be able to look past their wife’s aging skin and fucking the same vagina for 40 years, and that’s AWESOME. I’m happy for them. But for a lot of guys, they’re going to find out that “shit, it’s been a few years together and I’m kind of sick of her…and she’s hit 35 and is losing her looks…and I’ve got these younger girls hitting on me…why didn’t anyone warn me this might happen so I could plan a better arrangement (like a pLTR) where I can tap these young hotties and still keep my wife around??”

    I’ve met very few 30+yo women with magic life force lol The vast (VAST) majority of them (single and married) are miserable in 2016. They don’t have “awesome beauty and radiant ease of a deep woman that stops your mind, widens your heart, and suspends your body in the mystery of feminine grace, all in an insant, with a single gaze or touch, regardless of her body’s age”. lol They don’t have “no bounds to the rapture which may resonate through your union”.

    ESPECIALLY compared to the happy upbeat energy of a young hottie who hasn’t been crushed by the world.

    I just hate these myths lol They perpetuate the madonna/whore complex guys already have and reinforce their Blue Pill fantasies and don’t prepare them for the harsh reality that guess what, your wife will probably get old and gross to you, how are you gonna deal with that, and is that something you WANT to deal with or do you want a different life plan, or do you have ideas on how to make that work for you. And guess what having a kid might not be a big spiritual enlightenment for you, it might just be like owning a really high-maintenance pet that rebels against you in its teens and uses the legal system to fuck with you because you took away its iphone.

    Let’s prepare men for reality.

    Like holy fuck look what LeeLee just dropped:

    “a lot of the things I consider my personality and my values (making sex a priority, being really into sex, being really into my marriage, wanting my husband’s attention) are really mostly young woman hormones.”

    Men should be FULLY AWARE OF THIS SHIT before they commit or have kids with a chick. It doesn’t do men any good to fluff that shit up and be like “sure, SOME women, but if you find the magic NAWALT she’ll fuck you 10x a day when she’s 60 and she’ll still be an HB10, long as you have my sick skillz brah!”

    Like if a guy knew all that shit, maybe he’d make different life choices. But when guys hear that SOME women somehow defy nature, they think “the one *I’M* with will defy the laws of nature because MY girl is the unicorn NAWALT madonna!”

    It’s important to know that a lot of that stuff is on YOUR end. YOU’VE found ways to find your aging wife still sexually attractive enough to want to fuck her all the time. The ways you’ve managed to do that are useful for guys to know…if focusing on her magic essence helps, cool, that’s awesome, but guys should be aware that it takes effort on their part to do and that it’s not going to just magically work out with their unicorn NAWALT who’s going to somehow not hit the wall in her mid-30s.

    @theasdgamer
    “Actually scrib was dissing Blax’s stories.”

    Making fun of them is not the same as saying don’t write them lol I’m used to Naturals bigging themselves up so the stories don’t bother me. Criticism/dissing is not censorship. It’s dickish, but that’s not the same as saying get out of here don’t ever write anything lol

  67. @Blaximus
    “What I was expressing to Andy was that is a man is married or in a commited LTR, for lack of a better description, then Having your Cake and eating it to is an option, but it’s not honorable.”

    Ya, then I apologize ’cause I read it wrong.

    No comment on whether cheating is honorable or not, cause there are situations where I won’t judge a guy for it (like the stealing a loaf of bread to feel your starving family thing). But I stand by honor being a learned social construct (like when you learned not to keep hitting a guy who’s given up, that was learned since you kept going until you were taught not to with the ball grab lol other people’s definition of honor may be different depending on the different social conditioning they received)

    “I don’t get why I kept getting misunderstood on this simple point.”

    To be fair “having your cake and eating it too” could mean either having a Primary and banging girls on the side, or cheating on a monogamous commitment lol If you had said like, “you could marry a girl and then cheat on your vows on the side”, I wouldn’t have had a problem with what you said.

    “my bad for not getting that fems use that terminology to try and shame pua’s in some fashion. That wasn’t my intent in using that term.”

    Cool.

    No comment on scrib’s perspective of married guys ’cause I don’t entirely disagree with him, but I don’t entirely agree with him either. I think a girl can keep a guy sexxed up enough that he doesn’t care about other pussy (after I blow a load, I don’t care about sex for a while), but I also think a lot of guys view other pussy as coming with negative consequences/risks and also pump their girls’ value up to justify their decision. Not all guys, and not singling anyone here out in particular, but a lot in general. So like I say, I don’t fully disagree but I don’t fully agree.

  68. @YaRally

    “But like, let’s be honest for their sake. Same with the kids thing where everyone fluffs up the flowery “sure you may think you don’t want kids or want to be a dad but when you first hold your son and he squeezes your finger THEN you’ll see the magic special wonder of it all”…meanwhile you go on reddit in a “tell us the truth about what it was like” thread and see a dozen guys talking about how “ya it’s not really that special, it kind of sucks. I thought there’d be some magic moment but there wasn’t and really having a kid is pretty inconvenient and I’ve had to put aside a lot of my dreams for it, but I guess being a father is cool at times, there are good moments, it’s just not like the movies say”.

    And guess what having a kid might not be a big spiritual enlightenment for you, it might just be like owning a really high-maintenance pet that rebels against you in its teens and uses the legal system to fuck with you because you took away its iphone.

    Now that you caught me on a day that I can be honest with you:

    Yeah, I don’t recommend a guy has children after June 18th, 2016 unless he has a shit ton of resources (money) and is committed to be all in with their upbringing. And the best way to raise them is with a committed mother and father in the same household (married or unmarried). (And I promise I’m on the brink of not mentioning marriage so much anymore, but speak in terms of universal Relationship Game for men, when appropriate.)

    I didn’t get any major magic out of the children (perhaps a few minor magic moments when the boy hit a home run in baseball, or the girl performed great at dance, competetive cheer or gymnastics) until after they were twenty one years old. Originally, they were simply a by-product of my primordial drive to fuck a beautiful woman when she was 25 years old (exactly 25, heheh, imagine that?). Now we make a good family and Long Term Relationship Game is fun. Is that a completion in life? Hell No. It’s just another beginning.

    The investment of me and their mom payed of for them and society (they didn’t turn out to be rotten adults). I advocate for full investment in their up-bringing. If a man doesn’t want to do that, he shouldn’t procreate. Children should be a by-product, not an accident. And any man that gets divorce raped or doesn’t get married and has kids should still do what he can to provide for them because that is part of man’s intrinsic nature.

  69. “but I also think a lot of guys view other pussy as coming with negative consequences/risks and also pump their girls’ value up to justify their decision.”

    For the record and being honest: I’m not in that camp.

  70. fucking lol…saw this under the MGTOW tag on youtube:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRikFf7rSeI

    Chick is 30 there. Clicked her other videos and this is her a year later (this is pretty much what the average late 20s girl is like with regards to riding the cock carousel in 2016, trying to get off it but being sucked back in over and over):

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0pwRgAeQP8

    Then another year after that (spin, hamster, spin! I’m sooo much happier now!):

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aogDHGX7mq8

    And then a month later (holy shit wtf even, on so many levels):

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YgMo2ZOg2sI

    I’d like to ask Deida which part of these last 2 vids are her life force shining with radiance and demonstrating her beauty of depth lol

    The world has changed. Social media and technology put 10,000 men (many of them seemingly high-value because their profiles are their best versions of themselves) at their fingertips in their purse 24/7. “Me” culture where the solipsism and self-importance and potential mini-celebrity status as all the likes and validation come in for every little thought or pic posted on Facebook/Twitter has been magnified a thousand-fold.

    I think it’s bad to fill guy’s heads with that flowery shit. Some guy is gonna read that Deida excerpt and how some women magically don’t hit the wall etc, and try to marry a chick like this when she’s 30, expecting her to become this radiant magic unicorn that fucks them 6x a day when they’re 45+. Just like Steve Hyde married his chick buying into that shit and has fully convinced himself that the sex doesn’t matter, his relationship is about spiritual essence and bla bla while he’s up spanking it to pornhub and she’s on Tinder swiping for a bad boy.

    “For the record and being honest: I’m not in that camp.”

    I’m not saying your guys’ wives aren’t awesome, I’m sure they’re super great. I’m just saying let’s keep things in reality ’cause all of society is gonna tell Steve that his wife will have a magic essence that fucks him 6x a day when she’s in her 40s, and all of society is gonna tell some guy who’s laying there with his wife he’s not attracted to anymore, thinking about some hot young secretary he works with (who’s more pleasant and feminine and happy than his bitter aged wife), that there’s something wrong with him for not finding her wrinkled old hands sexy wrapped around his cock if he can get her to even touch it lol

    If a guy WANTS to enter a committed LTR and have kids etc with a girl KNOWING that she may 180 on him, he may lose physical attraction for her (quickly too, if she’s 30+), his kids might turn out to just be assholes or inconveniences, etc, that’s cool. As long as he’s aware of all the realities instead of walking around in a Deida cloud of magic essence unicorns and NAWALT wall-defyers.

    Shit I’m even cool with marriage, as long as a guy fully understands all the risks it involves and is fully equipped with the Red Pill knowledge to give him the best possible odds. I’d still think he was insane, but at least he’s a well-informed crazy person.

    Men being kept in the dark about reality and potential/common negative outcomes is why our Red Pill communities even EXIST in the first place lol

  71. Rollo, how much of your marriage success do you place as being attributed to your smv being higher than your wife’s? When you married, was your smv higher than hers than as well? Were you better looking than her or equal.

    Sorry, just trying to understand a little better. I know in another interview you said your frame intertwines with your career and that it has taken priority over your wife’s, which I believe is important. Studies show that a woman earning less than half of household income lowers divorce risk quite a bit. I would think much of your marriage success would be placed on your successful career, your wife’s diminished earning capacity, and the fact you probably look better than other options your wife could hookup with in the marketplace. Of course, your game is important, but I think those factors are the foundation. Maybe I’m wrong. Then again, there are handsome rich guys that still have their wife divorcing them.

    Am I being too simple by distilling marriage success down to traditional gender roles, husband’s career prioritiy, and being good looking and earning as much as possible? And, the partner pick matters a great deal. Apparently your wife was experienced sexually so the common divorce risk study on partner count did not apply as strongly here.

  72. @ YaReally
    @ SJF

    Holy shit!!!! Lmfao!!!

    Those vids Ya posted of that chick, daammmnnn.

    Okay. I admit that I must be caught in some kind of mental time warp or something. I’m going to ask my doc to order me up a brain mri asap.

    I don’t know any folks like the chick in the videos. This is why after reading what Ya says, I get compelled to get out in the wild and observe what the hell is going on.

    All of that drinking and booty calling and angst is wrecking this chick. But hey, You Go Girl!!!!

    I mean, I have a gigantic circle ( socially I guess, is more accurate ) of friends and family and coworkers. For the past few weeks at work, the guys have been making fun of a woman here who is slamming face first into the wall. I don’t really know her that well, but she seems a bit thrown by her falling smv and she’s overcompensating by being hyper flirtatious and dressing inappropriate for her age in a try hard fashion.

    She is being referred to as the ” Spider Monkey ” by the men at the job. Yet, I recall a decade ago when these same dudes mostly, were springing boners in her presence. They detect zero sense of irony in this.

    Women aging. Hmmm.

    Growing up spending a lot of time around older people, practically as much time around them as I spent around people my own age, I don’t see aging as a negative. It’s a good thing that I didn’t because I’m old now. I do not look the same as I did at 25. I don’t know anyone who does.

    Following in SJF’s honesty protocol, my wife does not look exactly the same as she did when I first met her at age 24 or so. She was never a heavy drinker, druggie or carousel rider and always took pride in her appearance.

    I was attracted to her from the first time I saw her, and I remember that moment as if it were yesterday. It’s a memory. I don’t do flowery, lol.

    She’s never been one for wearing a lot of make up and the like, so it was easy to actually see who you were looking at. Flawless skin. As I’ve said before, I have become an expert at deconstructing the make up tricks employed by women, so I am un-trickable with contouring, foundation and various eye shadow techniques. I can see through that stuff.

    After having my daughter, my wife lost all but about 10-15 pounds of her pregnancy weight, but much of that must’ve remained in her breasts…chuckle, no problem in my eyes.

    The things I found attractive in wifey have not changed over the past 19 years ( 20 coming up..). The only thing I’ve ever told her in regards to her appearance is that I never wanted her to cut her hair short. She has a few grey hairs, but she’s 48 years old. Lol, I understand that menopause is fast approaching, and she is very concerned about how that will affect her, but I am not concerned. My lack of concern is not out of ignorance though, as I fully understand the mechanics of menopause and it’s negative possibilities. To my mind, it’s part of the deal. If my prostate went south on me, I know she won’t hold it against me.

    The whole wrinkle thing is interesting to me though. I’m 55 and the only wrinkles I have are on my balls. My dad is 78 this year, and he is not very wrinkly at all. The wife has no wrinkles either, and if her family is any indication, she has quite a ways to go before any changes like that appear.

    But they will appear.

    Wife spends a lot of time around women 20-30 years her junior and I get a lot of time to observe her against that young backdrop. She does just fine, but of course she’s not 21 years old.

    I don’t think men or women should ever fear aging. It’s much better than the alternative.

  73. Meh. This whole conversation is getting very emo all around.

    Marriage, monogamy, pua. Whatever.

    If you are weak you will be crushed by women. Always. And you are likley being crushed in other aspects of your life as well.

    Just now the thing is we have never had so many weak men…

  74. @YaReally

    “Men being kept in the dark about reality and potential/common negative outcomes is why our Red Pill communities even EXIST in the first place lol”

    My narrative hasn’t changed. I think a guy should be as least clueless about hypergamy as possible. I think he should be good at game.

    Yes men are lied to a lot more today than ever before. They also have less fortitude than ever before.

     BluePillProfessor:              “Basically, a relationship with a woman is a Jedi-Mind fuck designed to trick you. In our society, with no support for men and massive amounts of terrible and consistently deceptive sexual advice given to men the effect is multiplied many times. By providing massive levels of cunning and manipulative advice to women designed to magnify the “Beta-ization Effect” the results are toxic. Given all this, it is not surprising that marriage often turns men from the strong, confident “Alpha Fuck” god into the emotionally needy and hardworking “Beta Buck” provider.

    This is not your 50,000 years ago. A guy doesn’t actually have to get off the couch or put down the XBox in order to simply exist.

    He doesn’t have to choose a path that “he thought was the right thing to do” with wisdom and foresight.

    Stuffinbox made an excellent comment here:

    https://therationalmale.com/2016/06/06/the-talk/comment-page-6/#comment-159976

    Not really being there as a young man today i can’t really feel it.Learning the truth and getting rid of the mis-information was tough for me in my youth.The world isn’t really any harder to survive in than it was then,these guys are just dealing with a truckload more lies than we were.

    So are they doing the best they can with what they have to work with?

    When I read the Rational Male with my eyes coming from my experience it is like there it is what i was thinking spelled out,no question wow there it is..
    When these young guys read it,I don’t know maybe it is too much to digest,the mind starts chewing and the eyes wander between the lines this may be the best they can do with what they have to work with.

    Some of this stuff is not practical advice. When you get older and had a lot of experiences you get philosophical and at some times spiritual in order to get your rocks off and explain life because you are not so afraid to die. And then start really living. Look at KFG’s comments. That guy almost didn’t make it out of the starting gate 60 years ago. Look at how philosophical he is. It is a joy to be philosophical and spiritual (in an amoral, non-churchian way).

    I read Deida 15 years ago, when I was struggling with the fog of LTR and with young kids. I called total fucking bullshit back then. I couldn’t abide by being spiritual when I wasn’t being gratified physically with money, easy profession, rug rats and not enough sex. It makes all the sense to me know. It explains A Man’s Way, Dealing with Women, Working with Polarity and Energy, What Women Really Want, Man’s Dark Side, Feminine Attractiveness, and Men’s and Woman’s Yoga of Intimacy (whatever the fuck that means).

    Today that shit is gold because it actually does explain red pill and relationship game. The pseudonymous Joseph W. South was high on the Deida spiritual guide it in that podcast I posted of his and he is and advocate and successful purveyor/advocate of many simultaneous inter-sexual relationships (MLTR = Multiple Long Term Relationships)
    Just like Stuffinbox, I don’t have a feel for walking in the 2016 young man’s world. But I do have skin in the game with lies being told to young men–with a 21 year old son.

    I appreciate the concern for young man’s game, but I also know the wisdom of 5 decades of experience at not being given the truth at every turn. Having to live my life with courage and take chances. Even if I had been given the truth, I might not have been experience to use it properly. I wish I could have borrowed a couple of Blaximus’ uncles along the way. And had the manosphere.

    Ever notice why the older guys (including Rollo) post more comments about red pill theory? Because it is important to emphasize based on our decades long experience in living our experiences and everyone out there having a different station in life and skill level and resources. Guys don’t want to get it, so we go on and on talking about the same thing in different permutations.

    Notwithstanding yours or Franco’s advice:

    “One important thing: the art of seduction cannot be learned only from books! This manual will help you to find the right way. Without the use of your brain and legs, however, you will not get results of any kind. You must do the field work!”

    You have to trust that some of us did 50 years of field work. Off our asses and keyboards.

    But I digress.

    I’m all for cluing in other guys and all for guys rejecting stuff that I comment on. (By all means a non-committed man should not commit in 2016 with a shitty girl. But don’t overlook a possible valuable girl.) And being stronger from the blog dialog. My recommendation is to do the work. Be red pill aware and be masterful at game. To not be timid or unsure of his path. To plan ahead in 4 year increments. To not think NEXT is always the solution for relationship game (esp. when children are involved). I’m not advocating for a particular lifestyle. But I’m not going to blow up my lifestyle for mere pussy. Anyone can achieve their goals, whatever they may be, with desire and mastery. But that also takes some spiritual cohones like RSD Tyler advocates.

    Yes, times have changed but some of us chose that lifestylye 10 to 28 years ago and the thing is that Next is not always the proper solution when a turnaround in the individual man is possible through red pill awareness and Game. 90% of red pill is masculine self-improvement. 90% of Game is having mastery.

  75. “Just now the thing is we have never had so many weak men…”

    Wish I had a nickle for every time Sentient said something before me as I was composing my comment.

    “This whole conversation is getting very emo all around.”

    I apologize for transgressing Law #4. I’m weak.

  76. I actually clipped Franco’s statement:

    “One important thing: the art of seduction cannot be learned only from books! This manual will help you to find the right way. Without the use of your brain and legs, however, you will not get results of any kind. You must do the field work!

    To become an expert seducer you need to meet women and talk to them. No theory can substitute constant practice.

    The only way to get results and to learn and improve in the art of seduction is constant practice. After all what waits for you at the end of the road is such a pleasant reward!

    Nothing can be obtained in life without application and dedication. Not even pleasure.

    So read this book, start your field work and learn how to do it! ”

    He wrote this one after the co-authoring “Practical Female Psychology” with Joseph W. South.

    Well worth the read:

    https://www.amazon.com/Manual-Seduction-Franco-Meet-Women-ebook/dp/B018YAGH4A/ref=sr_1_5?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1466294739&sr=1-5

  77. The Man is a chick. She tries on new personalities like girls try new hair colors. Guys don’t need reassurance to play nice; they act. They don’t beg moderator and when don’t get what they want act like it is okay.

  78. Sentient said _ ” If you are weak you will be crushed by women. Always. And you are likley being crushed in other aspects of your life as well.

    Just now the thing is we have never had so many weak men…”

    I have this thought practically every single day. I complained of exasperation and Rollo responded thusly-

    Rollo Tomassi

    June 16th, 2016 at 8:42 am

    ” The push and drive for men to think like and mimic women in thought process and action is exasperating.” ( me )

    “” It’s exasperating because so many men for so many generations now have been taught and conditioned to believe that the more they identify with the feminine the more acceptable they will be for intimacy with women.

    https://therationalmale.com/2011/09/04/identity-crisis-2/

    The greater whole of Beta Game is founded on the idea that the more alike a man is with the feminine the more attractive a mate choice he will be. It’s a like-attracts-like deductive mentality and it’s categorically false; debilitating even.

    That said, while it’s important to maintain a masculine difference and an almost narcissistic dedication to men making themselves their own mental point of origin, it still serves men to understand the mindset, natures and motivations of women. It’s important to get into their headspace to understand and use it to your advantage, while never becoming one with, or identifying with, that headspace.””

    This make too much sense to me. So yeah, we’re surrounded by “weakness” in our brothers, but there is an explanation for this predicament.

    So what do we do? Turn our backs on those that need our help? Or do we keep trying to help in any fashion available, even though the weakest will laugh and mock?

    I choose to keep trying to help in some small, miniscule fashion. I won’t succeed mostly, but if I can garner just a little success in helping another man to SEE those things outside of the FI, then it will indeed be worth it.

  79. @ Sentient

    Not to get all soft and mushy, but I really appreciate the work Rollo has put in. It does make a difference. He does not have to bother with any of this, yet he does and he does so with a good measure of passion.

    I’ve done a lot of shit in life that was hard and uncomfortable, but I doubt that I could have done The Rational Male for any length of time without losing my shit.

  80. Re: Kids

    I always ( as far back as I can remember ) wanted to be a father, under the right circumstances. I made sure I didn’t accidently knock up random hoes, because I wanted to choose the ” right woman ” to have my children, and I knew enough to understand that at a young age, I did not posses the necessary discernment.

    My kids have added to my life greatly. Speaking strictly for myself, I don’t think my life would have been as complete without them. I wish circumstances would have aligned in such a way that I could have had more.

    Resources are a factor, but never ( for me ) the main factor. Children should not be seen as a drain or a problem that has to be dealt with.

    I don’t mainly see my kids as a ” passing off ” of my dna. I see them more as life that I helped to mold and nurture and teach.

    My firstborn came into the world under dire circumstances. She did grow and thrive beyond my expectations, and demonstrates that the time invested in her was not wasted in any measure. I was 24 when she was born, and I was fully, mentally ready and capable.

    My next opportunity came at 39 years old. Many friends said I was insane to have a child at that age. Lol. I was secure in my path and it has never been disappointing on any level.

    When I go out with my family, my 16 year old still loves to hold my hand while walking. My wife tipped me to something that I was unaware of a few weeks back. While walking in a mall, holding my child’s hand, wifey said that people were gawking at us. I was oblivious to what other folks were doing, but my wife said it was because of the age difference.

    Never even crossed my mind. Zfg.

    Personally, I am family centered. Not that this is good, or bad, it just is.

    Now, I don’t endorse parenthood for every one in any fashion. Just giving my example and reasoning.

  81. “Not to get all soft and mushy, but I really appreciate the work Rollo has put in. “

    First, Rollo has made my not-so-bad-life fun again. A couple years ago I was not being fun and adding value. Now I add value to others more readily. A thousand thanks!

    Second: Blaximus, I want to thank you for your comments over the past year and a half. You have truly helped me get a masculine mindset and strength galore simply by being a good example of masculine strength.
    And expressing that well.

    I actually never actually observed men like your uncles and grandfather in real life.

    “So what do we do? Turn our backs on those that need our help? Or do we keep trying to help in any fashion available, even though the weakest will laugh and mock?”

    We keep trying to help in any fashion available, even if anyone mocks. For the benefit of the tribe of men.

    I truly don’t think a real man has to bottom out in order to finally get it, and have desire to make his strategies work. A man just has to have a passion for a pursuit and then develop mastery. Odds are he needs to be fucked in the ass to move, but that is a relative, not absolute requirement for him to move off the couch.

    I linked to this a couple days ago:

    https://therationalmale.com/2012/04/03/hear-me-now-believe-me-later/

  82. @ SJF

    Thanks man, for those kind words. I appreciate it immensely.

    Truth time: Re my great uncles and great grandfathers and grandfather. Having them in my life, in hindsight, was more special than I ever imagined at the time.

    The downside is that since they have all passed on, there is always a feeling of loss that never truly subsides. Hardly a day passes by that at least one of them isn’t in my thoughts. I was a pallbearer to every one at the end. The first few times, the grief was almost unbearable, but it got a little easier each successive time.

    You said earlier in a comment that you don’t fear death. I know exactly what you meant.

    Compared to the men that went before me, I will always be a rookie at life. I have never, ever measured up to them in manhood. You know what? I am good with that because these great dudes, loved me and made sure I knew that much.

    So forgive me if I take ” You’re so old fashioned ” as a compliment. Lol.

    Thanks again brother.

  83. @YaReally re:kids and social conditioning about having them being the most wonderful thing, great example.

    Now, as I never went through it I won’t know for sure how it would be for me, but neither can anyone else.

    Sometimes it is passed off as being the meaning of life, and from a genetic point of view it is, but in several million years it won’t have mattered anyway.

    And furthermore I suspect half of those fathers are probably fooling themselves in the same way a Beta husband like Steve may be trying to fool himself that his wife is wonderful.

    I’ve been tempted time and again to confront some people more with more Red Pill knowledge than me (typically in the MRP reddit) that I think they have One-itis… For their kids. And maybe endure bullshit from their wives or kids because of that. I think they should be their Mental Point of Origin (not their kids or the idea of having kids).

    I’m pretty sure Rollo gets this one right and doesn’t put his daughter on a pedestal.

  84. By the time a woman has told you overtly to go get some outside you probably should have been getting it already. Also, a man MUST pay a woman for divorcing him if she tells him to go get some out there and he does it? I don’t know if these videos accurately depict the state of affairs in the west, or some media drama for stimulating the audience’s imagination. Honestly, I think there is a lot of fiction in there being touted as rl. For screen play. Steve is in on the loop, pretending to be the doop…

  85. Rollo, I know that you are not a personal advicer, but if you have couple minutes for me I should write you about my (not yet problem) but delicate doubth. On e-mail if it posible

      1. I was a litle more emotional than it is good for me and in huryy for answers posted my doubth on comment section. If you can take a look on that and sey something with your knowledge I would be gratefull.

  86. Incidentally I’ve been reading Mihaly Csikszentmihalyis “Flow” and came upon the following passage about possible happiness in marriage and family constellations which fits our discussion here:

    “Cicero once wrote that to be completely free one must become a slave to a set of laws. In other words, accepting limitations is liberating. For example, by making up one’s mind to invest psychic energy exclusively in a monogamous marriage, regardless of any problemes, obstacles, or more attractive options that may come along later, one is freed of the constant pressure of trying to maximize emotional returns. Having made the commitment that an old-fashioned marriage demands, and having made it willingly instead of being compelled by tradition, a person no longer needs to worry whether she has made the right choice, or whether the grass might be greener soemwhere else. As a result a great deal of energy gets freed up for living, instead of being spent on wondering about how to live.“

    Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi: Flow: The Psychology of Happiness, p 180.

    Can any of you older and successfully married guys confirm this perspective? I’ve certainly never experienced this effect as described above in any monogamous realtionship and know very little married couples around me of whom I could say the above _might_ be true.

    Also, this approach only works as long as the marriage lasts, doesn’t detonate and so on. I’d say, it’s not impossible that this approach to marriage could work, or rather could have worked, but it describes a rather ideal marriage 1.0 scenario in the old-set-of-books constellation. This seems to describe the way some of the (even then extremely rare) “good marriages” worked before the changes came.

    In 2016, this sounds like a recipe for disaster.

Speak your mind

%d bloggers like this: