Wives & Lovers

Wives

(h/t Zelscorpion for the screen cap)

In Women Behaving Badly I made mention of Dalrock’s standing assertions that the context of romantic love has superseded the condition of a committed monogamy – traditionally marriage – as an idealized goal-state. Essentially this represents a reversal of a previous intersexual dynamic that served as a check and balance of women’s innate Hypergamy:

What nearly all modern Christians have done is place romantic love above marriage.  Instead of seeing marriage as the moral context to pursue romantic love and sex, romantic love is now seen as the moral place to experience sex and marriage.  This inversion is subtle enough that no one seems to have noticed, but if you look for it you will see it everywhere.

Lifetime marriage, with separate defined roles for husband and wife and true commitment is what makes sex and romantic love moral in the biblical view.  In our new view, romantic love makes sex moral, and the purpose of marriage is to publicly declare that you are experiencing the highest form of romantic love.  Thus people now commonly refer to a wedding as “making our love official”.

The gradations we now apply to romantic love are symptomatic of the problem.  We take great care to distinguish between “pure love” or “true love” and mere “infatuation” or “puppy love”.

[…] Because it is love and not marriage which now confers morality upon sex, sex outside of marriage is now considered moral so long as you are in love.  Thus we have the modern harlot’s defense/anthem “but we were in love!”

I think what Dal was getting at with this (and I hope he’ll comment) has a much broader reach than just in Christian (“Churchian”) culture. I think this raising of romantic love to the highest order is more punctuated in a religious context because, doctrinally, it should be the reverse. In an objective secular context this reversal is all but taken for granted.

In an age of feminine social primacy women’s feelings of romance are at a premium. We matter of factly presume that it’s a man’s responsibility to not only invest himself in, and provide resources for, his wife and children’s wellbeing, but it’s also (almost exclusively) his burden of performance to stimulate and maintain his wife’s romantic interests.

I’ve argued the position that women (of today) don’t find the ‘good guy‘ – a man attempting to embody the best aspects of Alpha Fucks and Beta Bucks – a believable role. My assertion is that women expect and desire those aspects in different men at different times as needed, however, the social narrative still places that “best of both aspects” burden on a man who does commit to a woman in the long term.

With the exception of only the most adept, affluent and exceptional of men, this expectation is a sisyphean recipe for failure. No matter which aspect he excels in the other aspect potentially becomes his personal flaw. Although his personal strengths may compensate, feminine-primary social expectations place him in a no-win position.

Wives Hate Sex

Badpainter and Sun Wukong had an interesting exchange in this week’s comment thread:

Badpainter:

Newgal states clearly women must be sluts for men to get laid. This also means women must be sluts for women to get laid. Why must that be true? Because Newgal alludes to a dirty little truth so ingrained in the social consciousness it’s a cliché: wives hate sex. Therefore women, sluts and otherwise, get married so they can stop having sex except as necessary to get pregnant.

Think about it.

The girlfriend provides sex good enough to motivate a desire in the man to commit. After the wedding is a period of at least adequate sex followed by a decline to little or nothing if she can get away with this. When the wife becomes suitably frustrated/disenchanted with the marriage she changes title to divorcée and is again free to become a sexual creature.

The source of the problem is that women have very little sense of self that is internally derived therefore they play roles defined externally. These roles are proxies for their identities which barely exist. In 2015 wives are not defined as sexually giving, or sexual at all except for the honeymoon period. If the sexual wife exists in this culture it as the adulteress giving herself to men other than her husband.

Sun Wukong

Oh absolutely. The wife that hates sex is such a “thing” now I really think it’s what makes even Blue Pill guys at least pause on their way to the altar. “Do I really want to put a libido draining fat license on her finger?” I think that premise is largely built out of feminine cynicism about settling for [Beta Bucks]. They all know the script so well that they assume they’re going to marry a guy they don’t want to fuck. Imagine that: assuming you’re going to hate sex for the rest of your life.

What a horrendously awful view of a man you haven’t even met yet. And he’s not even met you but assumes he’ll be happily making love to you for the rest of his life and you’ll do the same. What a disconnect. Oh well, at least the kids will be happy right? Anybody?

What Badpainter and Sun have illustrated here is the direct result of placing a romantic condition for love as the prime requisite for a committed relationship. It’s important to grasp that any relationship founded on genuine desire will necessitate genuine passion and not a small amount of feral lust, however, it is exactly this pre-commitment (Alpha Fucks) sexual chemistry that will later become the exclusive responsibility of a man in that commitment.

The character that is a wife is now socially and popularly expected to move into a sexless, passionless and unexciting condition by being married today. All Epiphany Phase rationalizations aside, marriage is viewed as the end of the party. Being a wife is boring by comparison.

I explored this in detail in Beta Fucks and As Good As It Gets, but what I find ironic in light of Dalrock’s assertions about romance-primary intergender dynamics is that the very pretense of that romantic “true love” context that supposedly legitimizes sex is killed within the confines of marriage. In fact, women expect and anticipate that the sexual desire they find so important in that romantic context will necessarily die once they become a ‘wife’.

The pretext of being a ‘wife’ is a socially excusable expectation of progressively losing sexual affinity for the man she’s agrees to marry, so what woman wants to be a wife? Women become wives due to the necessities an ever-decreasing capacity to maintain being a lover requires of them.

I expect that most women will disagree with me on a personal level; it’s not in women’s best interest to acknowledge that wives hate sex – perpetuating the belief that sex gets better after marriage is a necessity men need to internalize in order to commit. Whether or not this is true for a woman on a personal basis isn’t my point. The point is that the societal message is one that marriage will necessarily kill a couples’ passionate sexual connection in comparison to their single, romance-based sexual connection.

Why ruin a perfectly good relationship with marriage?

The Myth of Mismatched Libidos

Once married, there are myriad social conventions already emplaced for a wife to rely upon as she moves from exciting singleness into mundane, but necessary, long-term commitment. Most of these she’s already been conditioned to expect she can rely on. ‘Mismatched Libidos’ is a common refrain for women (and marriage counselors) who come to a point where they can no longer palate the “duty sex” they felt responsible for in the beginnings of their marriage.

Her husband isn’t expected to provide the ‘tingles, but he’s still responsible for the failure to create them. As I said, only the most exceptional of men can effortlessly inspire the admiration necessary to maintain a woman’s Hypergamous interest. If you have a read of the screen cap Zel provided us with for this post you’ll get an idea of how those pre-made social conventions work in tandem with men’s default responsibility of satisfying a woman’s endless discontent.

The deference is always to the feminine, thus any problem (particularly sexual ones) he has with her become his personal issues and flaws. Any deviation, any dissatisfaction, with the ready-made social conventions set in place to excuse the female sexual strategy are solely his responsibility and his character flaws.

The ship is going down, and I’ve only got three life jackets. Who am I going to give them to? John, you learned to swim a long time ago, right?

In last week’s post comments I quoted the following confessional from Love Shack:

My wife called me today and was all excited about some beachfront apartment she saw. She wants us to buy it for vacations and such.

Now here I am .. I just turned 50. My youngest is going to college this year and I guess I just realized that I’m no longer bound to her.

The last 20 years has been a long series of quickies and 3 minutes handjobs every 3-4 weeks. In between, I spent my prime sexual years mostly masturbating to get off. Now that I’m 50, my drive is still good, but it’s not what it was.

I had tried everything I could think of over those 20 years to get things on track. I was exemplary with chores around the house, I was attentive to her emotional needs as far as I could anticipate them, and even if I do say so myself – I’ve kept myself in outstanding shape (although that was more for me).

On the other hand, I look back and I can hardly remember a time that she spontaneously gave me a neck rub, or cooked something just for me as opposed to all of us, and certainly not even attempting to do something special for me sexually (yeah, I have a minor kink or two).

But when she asked me to buy a beachfront place today – my immediate reaction was annoyance. I realized then that I feel resentful. I have decided to leave her. There is absolutely nothing she can do now to change anything because the past cannot be changed.

This man’s situation represents the ending phase of a chronic lack of admiration on his wife’s part. It would be easy to point out his role is one of being the dutiful unconsidered provider in his wife’s Frame, however, consideration is never a motivator of genuine desire for a woman. Only admiration and an ambient imagination of losing the focus of it inspires genuine desire.

Girl With A Dragonfly Tattoo had a post recently outlining the expectations of women interested in “seducing” a man. On GWADT’s blog what’s implied is that this man is in fact her husband to begin with. What makes her points so difficult for married women to digest is that they should ever need to make an effort to do so. The reason this is so alien a thought to married women is because the men they wanted to seduce were the men they knew before they became ‘wives’. Wives have no use for seduction, and particularly so with the Beta men they settled for around their Epiphany Phase. Seduction, compassion, appreciation (such as can be expected of a woman) only become a necessity when women are subjected to a real preoccupation with losing a valuable man – a man they admire.

Even in Frank Sinatra’s time wives had to be told to be lovers too.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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ManlyMan
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Pam sez: “I can’t imagine getting into a relationship (let alone marrying a guy?!) if you have to act as though you enjoy him physically? Seriously?”

This is not mismatched libidos she’s talking about. This is Alpha Fucks. Wait for the epiphany and she’ll settle for Mr. Goodenough.

Glenn
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FI Alert: Check out a movie on Netflix, Ask Me Anything – it’s FI-porn cheering on 18 yr old girls jumping on the cock carousel. In it, the main character, a nubile, waif-like blonde 18 yr old cutie preens and sluts herself about with reckless abandon. It’s not an unfamiliar motif but in this movie it’s taken to a lascivious, in your face, all-male denigrating place that i think is something new and vile. Any women following along at home here, here is some homework for you. Watch that movie and tell me, what is it demonstrating? I could only… Read more »

redlight
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@pam “I spent a lot of time travelling. Whether it was to his parents’ place when he was home or the hour train ride to his college. I also supported him when I had the opportunity, referring him to my father’s company during one of his co-op placements. And When he was struggling to get off of weed I massaged him down from his stress block. In terms of sordid details, I hate to put it out there, but… I put on a number of “shows”, inciting (usually successful) attempts at pretty much every imaginable position.” “We were each other’s… Read more »

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Glenn, I make no claims other than serendipity for finding some like minded masculine males who “get” what a red pill existence means to them and me. Definitely sounds like you are having trouble getting through the Kubler Ross stages of loss/grief. http://therationalmale.com/2012/07/25/the-5-stages-of-unplugging/ I learned in retrospect that this group of guys, a gang of like-minded individuals had similar phenotypes to me. The Meyer’s Briggs Personality Type Indicator helped me define my strengths and weaknesses as a personality and to realize why my thoughts and discussions resonated so well with two guys from my deer hunting habitat and two guys… Read more »

kfg
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Glenn – “KFG – although I’m at the point with all this that I just don’t bother talking to women . . .” Hey, remember me? I’m the guy who had your back when Kate was trying to mother hen you. If my comment doesn’t resonate with you, go with something else. It’s not the skin on my nose that’s at risk. As I said, I cannot choose for you and won’t lie to you to feign a definitive answer. And I concur with the advice to read Jack Donovan and find a group of like minded brothers. That is,… Read more »

Seraph
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@LiveFearless *Was there a mismatched libido phenomenon with her prior to your marriage?* It’s hard to say. By the time I met my wife at age around 28, I had only had 2 girlfriends by that point, and had has sex with exactly 4 total. This was mostly when I was younger, 19 to early 20’s. I went years without having sex. It wasn’t that I was a troll, either. Could have been in better shape, definitely needed to stop dressing like a dweeb, but I’m wasn’t ugly (although may have thought it). I was just utterly fucking clueless. I… Read more »

Hobbes
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@Glenn- I completely understand your existential ennui. I have experienced it before. In my early 20s when my parents died and when I turned 30 that both my best friends died. It lasted a long time and again once I found the RP. I think, or it seems to me, that that angst is literally a reaction to loss. It is a form of grief, but grief turned outwards towards the world, as opposed to the personal grief that we feel as emotion and loss. When we lose something of great importance, of course we begin to wonder what is… Read more »

Glenn
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@KFG – Ooops. Okay, still sounds like crap to me. I thought you were a woman, yeah, I remember now, my mistake.

rugby11ljh
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@Seraph
When I was growing up I felt the same way. Things where not as they seemed. The thing I find hilarious is the amount of denial I was putting myself in.

midwestboi
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I want to thank you all again. I am reading and reading. It is changing my perspective.
I am planning to tell her “See you” , do not let the door hit your behind ” tomorrow. I am grateful to you all.

sjfrellc
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Why so soon?

What about the script to go silent for two weeks, instilling nuclear dread, have make-up sex and then dump her.

midwestboi
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I have been treated like a “chump” for too long now. She can do this to someone else.

I deserve better.

ChocDoc
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@ midwestboi…..show this page to your friends…friends who are ready for this. Help to spread the wisdom in here. It’s time to spread this all over the fucking world

Enjoy and welcome.

rugby11ljh
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An a lighter note
“Every man’s life ends the same way. It is only the details of how he lived and how he died that distinguish one man from another.”
― Ernest Hemingway

http://www.sacred-texts.com/aor/dv/dvs022.htm

http://www.sacred-texts.com/aor/dv/dvs024.htm

midwestboi
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I read some of your comments. Some of Rollo’s essays, and this is my conclusion:

I would rather be alone at the South Pole fighting bears than spend another second with a manipulative, lying, deceiving woman.
I am nobody’s piece of crap. Thank you all and this site is awesome.

Jeremy
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So I gave a recent print copy of TRM to the 17-year-old sailing buddy. He comes from divorced parents, spends most time with mom, you know the story. He comes up to me a few days after giving it to him and says, “Hey, my mom saw that book you gave me.” I winced out, “oh no.. ” He then says, “She shook her head and said, ‘that doesn’t exist.'” At first I kind of chuckled with him. Hours later I found myself disgusted, a mother telling her SON, “rational males don’t exist.” Can you imagine the screeching from a… Read more »

LiveFearless
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@Jeremy Think of the power you’ve just given to that young man.

I’ve used the analogy before…

Only a few pages of either “The Rational Male” (volume) is equivalent to giving human growth hormone to the height-challenged boy.

His life at 6’3″ will be much enhanced over the 5’8″ he would have been.

World leaders are built with these two books. I’m looking forward to Volume Three.

Sun Wukong
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@Jeremy Yeah. I heard shit like that from my mom constantly. She railed hard on men. Complained about men. Took out all her frustrations about men on me. A couple decades on she can’t figure out why saying “I’m sorry about hitting you” once when I was 22 didn’t make me want to use up all my vacation time at every job visiting her. Bringing up all the constant misandry and grinding down of my self-esteem only resulted in being told to get over it. Apologies don’t seem very genuine when they’re selective, do they? Mothers like that destroy developing… Read more »

Jeremy
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MWB will be a hell of a lot less bitter now, having read all this material before becoming some sluts beta-bucks hubby than he would after being run through the divorce ringer.

rugby11ljh
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@jeremy @sun wukong
Both your comments make me think of this http://www.metacafe.com/watch/an-C6ai4muhYn7/the_aviator_2004_mother_gives_a_bath/

It’s weird my mother still can emotionally destroy me it with a red pill mindset I can move past that.

Sun Wukong
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@rugby For the past few years, even before TRP, I had been slowly asserting my frame over interactions between myself and my mother. Interactions between us occur entirely in my frame now. Her past behaviors were deplorable and now she duplicitously pretends the past didn’t happen, but I’ve learned to recognize it as female solipsism and protection of her self image. She failed at a lot of life, but she wants to believe she at least did awesome raising kids. Objectively, she sucked at it; I was abused physically and psychologically, my sister was abused psychologically. I wound up incel,… Read more »

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@Sun wukong I can relate my mother would encourage my father to immaculate me whenever i “misbehaved” it wasn’t helpful because my farther would beat me up to meet my mothers needs. I tried to avoid my family because the red pill is frame. No one is heathly in a blue pill frame if their is one? Both my parents held strong beliefs about God that was mostly coming from the femanine. My sisters would do open hypegamy while stealing from my mother and making her look crazy. It’s weird because the red pill explains their behavior but the blue… Read more »

Pam
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Thank you to those have been supportive. This blog is quite an enlightening read. @redlight As I said earlier – I was not looking to marry the guy and have kids, I was 19 and going to college and not even certain that I wanted kids, just happy with him when we were together. And of course children are a whole other ballgame in terms of responsibilities. It is because of that fact that I have not had any interest in having children with any of the short relationships that I have been in – I always felt that if… Read more »

Will
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@pam if you’re more interested in sex than your guy, than my answer was a serious and completely honest one. As long as you are honest with yourself than you’re good.

And the whole “real man” thing….cmon, this is a blog…you don’t know me and I don’t know you. I give honest advice to help people that is all. Take it or leave it.

Mr T.
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Pam the yesterday was: “The man I was certain that I would marry broke things off to be “just friends” when I went away for college. I figured that it was just time that he needed to himself and so I waited and indeed,” Pam the today: “As I said earlier – I was not looking to marry the guy and have kids, I was 19 and going to college and not even certain that I wanted kids, just happy with him when we were together. ” “I was a dancer at the time ” Mr T is too drunk… Read more »

Hobbes
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@Pam- I’ve avoided commenting because, well, who cares. I’d rather give my attention to the men here on this blog who are ignored and derided by society. At least you’ll get a ton of sympathy and empathy for your “pain”, from everyone whereas the men here would be roundly blamed, shamed and insulted for even asking the question. But it’s late and I’m tired of seeing your posts, (and a bit buzzed) so let me offer as much of an answer as possible over the ‘net. Has it occurred to you that you didn’t even love him to begin with… Read more »

Sun Wukong
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Dumping the other person is the ultimate DHV.

Everyone instinctively grasps this. Nobody’s ego likes the blow it deals.

Lucien
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@Pam I find it depressing that anytime a woman comments here, people only respond to her like they’re observing a chimpanzee in a cage…although that’s not a good analogy because it suggests scientific aloofness…scrutinizing her for signs of evil rather than responding like a human being, looking for signs of confirmation of their pet theories of why all women are out to get them, rather than answering the question. It’s sad, and I think conveys a profound neediness in the people who do it. In inability to relate to people who are different from you, because you can’t see past… Read more »

Lucien
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@Pam I have not read through everything, trying to take it all in as I am, and struggling to get to a proper understanding while struggling with the visceral reaction that comes from reading these posts while feeling lumped into the feminati that insist on man bashing they right off as activism or (worse) science…and I am wondering…does anyone know where to find a Red Pill woman for guidance? Pam, I hope you at least get to my comment before leaving the site altogether. I wouldn’t blame you for not coming back here, which is depressing; but still there is… Read more »

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@Glenn “But now? Is the purpose of life just to pursue pleasure? All this feels so empty. It’s not just me, right? And please, don’t proselytize to me, I’ve been quite religious at points in my life and quite consciously became an atheist – consider me the pickle that won’t become a cucumber again. I’m interested in how you guys deal with the existential angst of shedding a traditionalist worldview?” Reading what Lucien wrote reminds me of something that grounded me back in 1984 in a humanities seminar (an English class substitute). We read six books each semester and were… Read more »

Tilikum
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@ midwestboi (fuck did I really type that?)

Can’t be mad at her, she is fulfilling her programming devoid of the capacity to even understand much less appreciate the abstract. (like our new little Pam I see).

Do you get mad at your dog or your cordless drill? Women are mindless creatures that require husbandry. You can take the job or not, up to you.

JC
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I am going through this right now. Had been separated a year after 22 years of marriage. The crazy making was too much and short story I left. Took the red pill and changed my view on women forever. She finally got into therapy for ptsd from her childhood, which initially bore fruit. I had a few girlfriends and had fun and decompressed. That is a whole story in and of itself. The wife finally got with one guy from work who was a mess of a man bigger than she *(law of attraction) and the relationship with new guy… Read more »

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Sun Wukong “Dumping the other person is the ultimate DHV.” @Pam: My guess is, you got the strongest feelings for that guy (in hindsight) because he did fuck around and also dumped you. The question why you couldn’t keep him is the wrong one. You wish you could have kept him because he was probably the only guy you couldn’t keep. I know my first gf is in a similar situation. The term for it in the manosphere is “alpha widow”, Rollo probably has some stuff on it. The point is: Move on, try the next one. And since you… Read more »

Excalibur
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Mistakes that men make regarding women:

The biggest mistake most men make is looking into those big doe eyes, at that weaker frame, at that child like voice and then telling themselves they’re loved for who they are.

The second biggest mistake men make is genuflecting on bended knee, with sword drawn, to protect that which would gladly destroy him for positive economic gain.

The third biggest mistake men make is in thinking they’re more cunning and calculating than women. Men deeply underestimate the callousness and glee with which women will destroy men’s lives for profit and/or entertainment.

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Tilikum – “Do you get mad at your dog or your cordless drill?”

Yes to both. Anger is a part of training of training dogs. I am genuinely angry when the dog eats my shoes for the third time. Untrainable dogs go to the pound.

Yes I get angry at my cordless drill. It’s less about the drill than failing to live up to the claims made by the manufacturer. And if the product fails to function it gets tossed/recycled/replaced.

Sun Wukong
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@Tilikum, badpainter Anger is the distance between your ideal expectations of reality, and actual reality itself as you experience it. The further apart the two are, the more you will find yourself angry with things. This means pretty much everyone has gotten mad at their dog or their cordless drill or their car or their girlfriend at some point unless they simply have no desire to improve the world around them. Part of the reason TRP can bring more of an attitude of Stoicism is bringing those expectations in line with actual reality. Once you’ve done that, anger is reduced… Read more »

rugby11ljh
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@Lucien On both your post well said and I agree as well on observation. It would be more beneficial to meet in person and discuss this to avoid a screen as a buffer. Which turns the intention on itself. It may sound good but other people can be whoever they want to be online. It’s in part why honor is essential least in person. What i find sad is that the anger and rage from anyone hear is a buffer. I may well be making a generalized statement but if you can speak to someone that way in person you… Read more »

Softek
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This girl I used to have ONE-itis for, and shut me down, had a sap for a boyfriend. At least he was for a while. She would only ever say negative things about him and seemed like she did nothing but henpeck him about getting a better job. She would always complain to me about her boyfriend even though she knew I was interested in her — wasn’t aware that I was friendzoning myself. But anyway, friendzoning aside, she never did anything but bitch about him and his lack of ambition, etc. He would say he was struggling with depression,… Read more »

Tilikum
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@ Sun and Badpainter,

Your comments reek of deep FI socialization. Build a better world….wut?

This ain’t an island and you ain’t Robinson Crusoe. The world has been built and lost. It ain’t any “red pill stoicism” its dealing with objective and observable reality.

Your world is lost (the one you are romanticizing), I’d suggest adapting to the one you live in.

Sun Wukong
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@Tilikum

Think you missed the point of what I was saying. Completely.

Try comprehension again with less condescension.

Emily L
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Happy Easter all! The primary purpose for my comment was to mention that I enjoyed reading Preventive Medicine and listening to the interview. After skimming through comments, I wonder if I said: “Geez, none of my teams are in the NCAA finals.” And what I really meant was: “Geez, none of my teams are in the NCAA finals.” Whether somehow it would be interpreted: “Here’s another feminist trying to invade our exclusive male space [because women are prohibited here] by asserting that she can relate to men by appealing to men and trying to seem like one of the guys… Read more »

Lucien
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@rugby11ljh

Haha totally man. Honestly it’s depressing but I don’t actually know anyone who fully embraces this whole worldview in real life, although I have a few friends who I’ve tested the waters with, with positive results. I like trying to talk through this stuff with other people who are struggling with it, because in the real world it’s practically against the law to be honest about what ails us.

That said, I really need to stop procrastinating…hehe.

Atticus
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@Glenn “But now? Is the purpose of life just to pursue pleasure? All this feels so empty. It’s not just me, right? And please, don’t proselytize to me, I’ve been quite religious at points in my life and quite consciously became an atheist – consider me the pickle that won’t become a cucumber again. I’m interested in how you guys deal with the existential angst of shedding a traditionalist worldview?” I’m going through this angst now. In the comments a few posts ago I alluded to the same thing when I was asking about a man’s mission. There is something… Read more »

LiveFearless
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The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine (Volume 2) is not a re-hash of the blog. It’s filled with new material. From Interview Two: http://therationalmale.com/2015/04/05/interview-two/ ROLLO TOMASSI: So, there’s an epiphany… I believe, that happens for women, where they, sort of, get right with themselves. If they were religious they get right with God and they want to live their lives the correct way, so all of the freebies they were giving away to the Alpha guys – They find a beta and they make him wait and they make him perform and they evaluate him and they see if he’s… Read more »

Softek
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You don’t always have to get older to feel the void of meaninglessness. Pursuing pleasure is one thing, and the emptiness of that, but not even being able to have pleasure is another. I basically have no friends anymore, I spend 99% of my time outside of work in complete isolation, I have absolutely zero sex life, I work a shitty job with a fuckwit for a boss, and I have to expend most of my energy at work keeping myself from punching him in the face or throwing a 2×4 at his bald little bowling ball of a head.… Read more »

johnnightwrites
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> The ship is going down, and I’ve only got three life jackets. Who am I going to give them to? John, you learned to swim a long time ago, right? Easy. The man takes the life jackets from the woman by force and lets her drown. He puts one jacket on and puts the other two on his kids. He does this out of compassion and love for his kids. In a life or death situation the woman is useless, but the man is absolutely necessary for the kids survival in the ocean. He can not be allowed to… Read more »

redlight
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redlight
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@Atticus

The answer is to develop and work on interesting projects. I use projects, instead of stuff or hobbies or things, to represent something that will take a lot of time and hard work to accomplish significant and substantial outcomes. I think “building a Christian orphanage/mission” is an example project. It might fail, it might take too long, but it certainly will give meaning to one’s life. And when one project is almost done, then start other. Of course women are just secondary, and primary focus is on the important.

Mr T.
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Mr T.
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@johnnightwrites

Your comment is true and sad and it brought this movie to mind
Abandon Ship 1957 Tyrone Power.

rugby11ljh
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rugby11ljh
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@softek @Emily L @lucien
Hey you folks especially Emily keep your head up. This screen is a buffer you three are not and I learned a hell of a lot from all three of you today.

Craiger
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Craiger
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Great article. Once again, much like the burden to perform article, it’s always on the man to “deal with it”. Women are required to do nothing more. Men have to be the patient, understanding, unemotional, non-moody, rational sex. Along with breadwinner, and when you have time clean and cook because women are too “stressed or busy”. In the end I understand them thankfully to people like Rollo, but as he says it doesn’t make the truth hurt any less.

Badpainter
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Badpainter
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Craiger – “Once again, much like the burden to perform article, it’s always on the man to ‘deal with it’. Women are required to do nothing more.” You do realize neither you nor any other man is actually required to “do” anything, or “deal” with anything. Yes there is an social expectation men will show up and make things right. But there is no actual obligation on any man to perform if he is willing to suffer/ignore the consequences. And ultimately those consequences require men to enforce. Only by threat of violence can the mass of men be coerced to… Read more »

anonymous
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anonymous
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@Seraph and others talking about “5 minute pump”: that’s on you, dude. Learn to be a better lover and last as long as you want to. Bang her for 90 minutes, or until you feel like making yourself cum — after she sees that you can do that (last for 40 minutes). If you have a woman letting you have sex with her, that’s a major accomplishment that many men do not have. So take advantage of it! If you have a woman letting you have sex with her and you do a “5 minute pump,” that’s a failure on… Read more »

redlight
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redlight
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Since we are at the end of commenting and not that many are likely still reading this, and this is about wives, here’s the lyrics to the latest hit of Meghan Trainor, “Dear future husband” First her video has been getting hit: “In her latest music video, she portrays a dutiful housewife who cooks and cleans while demanding to be bought diamond rings and called beautiful. And nearly a month after releasing her fifties inspired Dear Future Husband video, Meghan Trainor expressed her shocked reaction to controversial claims that the visual images from her track are antifeminist.” http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3027562/Meghan-Trainor-reveals-did-not-expect-antifeminism-backlash-Dear-Future-Husband-music-video.html It is… Read more »

SFC Ton
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SFC Ton
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While the regular commentators have given MWB excellent advice I would like to recommend a some what different line of attack Take the bitch back in a few days and use her to; Learn about women and how they operate by contuining to read here, asking questions and observing the woman Practice his pimp hand and grudge fucking skills. Make all the decisions, tease, neg etc, make her ask permission to cum, tell her she is your property etc Acquire a second plate to spin And what not. I reckon such women aren’t much good for anything but practice, experimenting… Read more »

rugby11ljh
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@anonymous
Good post that seems to be a key part in being in a relationship. Especially self image.
Found this
http://www.fitness.com/articles/1019/the_top_3_ways_exercise_boosts_your_sex_drive.php
Hitting gym again two things I can change fashion and fitness.

Seraph
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Seraph
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@ Anonymous I appreciate the response. “@Seraph and others talking about “5 minute pump”: that’s on you, dude. Learn to be a better lover and last as long as you want to.” I was talking about my wive’s friends, i.e., as bad as I have it, they sound like they are in worse position. Bang her for 90 minutes, or until you feel like making yourself cum — after she sees that you can do that (last for 40 minutes). If you have a woman letting you have sex with her, that’s a major accomplishment that many men do not… Read more »

Sun Wukong
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@SFC Ton While in some respects I agree with you, I think the only reason that’s not necessarily a great idea in a position like his is pretty simple: he’s already emotionally invested in her. While he’s got some anger right now, the temptation to backslide will be high. With freshly unplugged guys exiting from a relationship they’re already heavily invested in, the best idea is almost always to have a clean break. It would be awesome if a dude could use the chick that tipped him off to reality as a fucktoy and test bed, but I just don’t… Read more »

midwestboi
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midwestboi
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Hey guys. Writing at lunch I broke it off with her. She went from being meak at first to a complete raving lunatic. She called me names. Told me I a had a small dick, all the Asian stereotypes. Ugly. Ugly. Ugly…. And yes I am average I think. She told me about the hot guys that want her, the lies about all these guys she called friends. She probably slept with at least one of them. OMG!!!!! She was foaming. I stayed calm and told her to leave. That was all. You guys saved me from a horrible decision.… Read more »

Bluepillprofessor
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@Will: Let me go all Socratic and ask you a few questions: -Do you think a man’s value stays the same through his life? -Does a woman’s perception of a man’s value change over time? -Can you describe a few of the factors in Marriage that lowers a man’s value? -Do you appreciate how the simple act of marrying (which you promote for “High Value” men) IMMEDIATELY lowers the man’s value? -Do you appreciate how over time the institution of marriage merged with yougogiiiirl culture and the Bluepill conditioning of the feminine imperative inevitably lowers a man’s actual SMV by… Read more »

Bluepillprofessor
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At what point does the high SMV husband become not so high SMV?

midwestboi
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I’m reading all of Rollo’s articles.
I have ordered both books. Sorry for the mistake.

Thank you Rollo.

Sun Wukong
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Sun Wukong
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SFC Ton
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SFC Ton
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Completely legit point Sun, and of course my suggestion isn’t worth a fuck if he cannot detach himself. Though that is a skill that can be practiced and improved on.

Good job MWB! & damn straight never let they affect your dignity. And half the chicks out there say you have a small dick when they are pissed AND even if you do have a small dick, who the fuck cares? Your dick is there to make you happy, not her

rugby11ljh
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@SFC Ton
Your dick is there to make you happy, not her
That part reminds me of Rollo talking about males having their hands down at birth.

Captain Obvious
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Captain Obvious
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This entire thread is a pretty strong argument for Marital Rape. Just make sure that she has plenty of orgasms. And never apologize afterwards.

Mad Yale Grad
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Mad Yale Grad
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“This entire thread is a pretty strong argument for Marital Rape. Just make sure that she has plenty of orgasms.”

The it wouldn’t be rape.

theeasylanding
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theeasylanding
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Wow, brutal! This gal needs a reality check. That’s super arrogant and just plan out mean to think that way about her husband… WOAH!!!

theeasylanding
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theeasylanding
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I just wrote about this at http://www.theeasylanding.com btw

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[…] Wives and Lovers […]

Tamara
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Tamara
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The pendulum swings both ways. I’m a Woman. Age 51. I stumbled onto this site by accident. Or by fate. I was googling articles to ” Better understand Men ” Iv randomly read many of the topics. I’m still grappling with the terminology & ideals. But I cryed my eyes out last night. I cryed again this morning. I spent over 25 years in a LTR, not married. I payed my own way. Was not privileged or spoiled by any means. I craved sex & passion & had to beg or make deals to get it from him. Not that… Read more »

rugby11
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rugby11
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“This man’s situation represents the ending phase of a chronic lack of admiration on his wife’s part. It would be easy to point out his role is one of being the dutiful unconsidered provider in his wife’s Frame, however, consideration is never a motivator of genuine desire for a woman. Only admiration and an ambient imagination of losing the focus of it inspires genuine desire.” https://twitter.com/CasualSexProj/status/814984678902005764 Lovers https://twitter.com/CasualSexProj/status/814622326285340672 Wives… https://twitter.com/CasualSexProj/status/811013536927322112 “The Myth of Mismatched Libidos Once married, there are myriad social conventions already emplaced for a wife to rely upon as she moves from exciting singleness into mundane, but necessary,… Read more »

Lewis Farrell
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Lewis Farrell
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Has anyone ever suggested this phenomenon is the female equivalent of men becoming habituated to porn? Porn addiction is so bad many men have erectile disfunction. Seems to me that the pattern of promiscuity among young women has gotten them “addicted” to the excitement that comes when the alpha guy might walk out of the door in the next minute. To the point that “normal” married sex is boring and they can’t do it anymore.

Sri
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Sri
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Oh, please. All these articles on women, written by women, treating their husbands as second class shit. And wow, all she does is bring her beta game to the table and is upset that it doesn’t work – and her hamster promptly shames her husband for it – I have always been amazed at the ability of women to play the power game and turn any situation to their favour. https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/30zvhq/im_99_mother_and_1_wife_and_it_has_to_be_that_way/ In old families, you had kids yes, but one thing was clear. Dad was the man of the house. Kids were loved and cared for and all that, but… Read more »

gorgeman
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gorgeman
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A guy commented here talking about how he needed to learn to tell his woman what he wanted her to do, to lead her. It sparked a thought in my mind that it makes more sense for the woman to support the man rather than the other way around – if the guy is looking after ‘the machine’ of the relationship as one commenter put it, then he is like at the helm of the ship, steering it, and directing the actions of other people onboard. I can’t quite remember the full insight I had but I’ll give it a… Read more »

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