As a part of my line of work doing liquor branding promos, I’ve frequently had to do spots with (terrestrial) radio talk shows for events and such. I’ve had to familiarize myself often with these personalities; some I became long time friends with, others kind of burned out or became victims of what they thought was a greater social proof than they actually had.
One thing I’ve noted in working with the men who host these shows is that more often than not they suffer from deeply invested Blue Pill mindsets with regard to women. Many of them eventually invited women into their male space as co-hosts to help with appealing to the female demographic, and like all other “female friendly” ventures, the character of the show shifts to promoting the same feminized boilerplate we see in Purple Pill forums and blogs that began with a more Red Pill tone.
Almost invariably there develops a segment or some call in bit where the host and hostess(es) attempt to suss out the romantic problems of a caller or emailer. If you listen to any semi-popular local morning commute show you’ll get this segment at least once or twice a week. All of them follow the same format. All of them rattle off the same Blue Pill tropes even those without the aid of a Red Pill Lens are familiar with – open communication, keep it fresh, meeting (her) needs, be supportive, etc. and all the standards you can expect from a society that doesn’t question the rote memorization of Oprah or Dr. Phil’s idioms.
If you do have a reasonably attuned Red Pill Lens you’ll just grind your teeth at all of it, but it confirms and highlights the Beta inside the host despite all his other blusterings on the show. It also serves to highlight the saturation of the Blue Pill’s conditioning reach into society.
So it was on one of these shows I was listening to this week that the ‘morning zoo’ decided to take a stab at one emailer’s very common problem. It was the typical Dead Bedrooms problem you’ll find in the subredd of the same name; “My wife is frigid, how do I get her to want to fuck me?” However, the story had a slight twist that nicely dovetails into a topic I’ve wanted to explore.
In this man’s story, he’d married a woman for all the right Blue Pill reasons. He loved her, “connected” with her on what he imagines are deep emotional levels, was supportive, dedicated, but was only able to have sex with her in as limited and as lackluster a way as she felt ‘comfortable‘ in having with him. After a year and a half of marriage, she’d completely “shut down” on him sexually. Anytime he initiated she would recoil from him and begin to cry.
There was no elaboration on her part as to why she was crying and up to the point of his seeking advice she’d offered no reason for her reluctance to fuck him. Fast forward to now and it’s been almost a year for him without sex with his wife, no explanation, and his ‘needs‘ are being unmet. He’s emotionally invested in her in the way you’d expect a Blue Pill, dutiful Beta would be, so his inner turmoil is one of the Paradox of Commitment conflict with his ‘need‘ and expectation of having sex with his wife.
As I said, this is standard Dead Bedrooms fare for the majority of men who married while fully immersed in a Blue Pill world. Unfortunately, we don’t have much more to go on – there were no descriptions of background, histories, family particulars, etc. given, however, my guess would be his wife is experiencing the very common post-marriage Beta ‘buyers remorse’. However, this is why I thought the analysis and advice on the part of the hosts (1 male host, 1 male, and 2 female co-hosts) were very telling about the state of the Blue Pill world.
The first reflexive interpretation on the part of the women was that this wife had some form of sexual abuse in her personal history and the husband’s initiating sex was triggering some unresolved sex issues she’d never dealt with and apparently never revealed to her husband when they were having sex in the years leading up to it. Again, there was no information about this from the emailer, but this was the first presumption the female co-hosts jumped to whenever a woman is described as crying about having sex.
We don’t really know if this is the case, but I found it interesting how useful that presumption is for women. In almost every social infraction we are expected to presume a blameless state with women. Whether that stems from rape allegations, ‘slut shaming’, past sexual history, red-handed infidelity, or, in this case, the presumed possibility of sexual abuse in a woman’s past, we are expected, on whole, as a society to presume that even the possibility is the actual fact.
Even when the actual fact is disproven, and the fault or choice blatantly falls upon the woman in question, the rationale and after-the-fact absolving of that woman of her own culpability is still expected to take precedence over the actual fault. For example, when I first detailed the situation of the woman and her husband in
For example, when I first detailed the situation of the woman and her husband in Saving the Best the reflex on the part of virtually all women responding to this story (as well as the relinks to it) and most Blue Pill men was to presume she had some damaged past where she was trying to find some emotional connection with the men she was having amateur porn orgies with in her college years. The acceptable, socially reflexive presumption was to give this woman a plausible reason – and one designed to evoke feminine victim sympathy – for her actions rather than consider that she was simply living in the moment and following her Hypergamous imperatives at the time.
Of course, the simple answer was that the husband was put into the same Dead Bedrooms scenario most men in his situation are placed in. He was the dutiful Beta in Waiting and “married a slut who fucks (him) like a prude”. There are over 30,000 subscribers on the dead bedrooms subreddit, this is not an uncommon occurrence, but just as common is the social convention of redirecting the fault on the part of the husband for his ‘selfish concerns’ for ever having been upset by this revelation about his wife. He was the bad guy for feeling ‘underserved’ with regards to his wife’s genuine, unobligated, sexual desire.
He’s the bad guy for not being understanding and supportive of the reflexive rationale that his wife must’ve been damaged goods (and damaged by other, equally horrible, men) before he decided to marry her. He’s responsible for coming to terms with it on his own. So it’s either face that or risk being perceived as the same kind of ‘typical’ asshole man who brought her to this by abandoning her in divorce.
‘Abuse’ as a Tool
‘Abuse’ is easily one of the most generic and utilitarian of catch terms and social conventions available to women living in a feminine-primary social order. It’s ambiguous, but also carries enough associative horror to get others to accept it at face value while killing any need for the uncomfortable explanations that would qualify it. A woman says “I was abused” and it ends the discussion regardless of any mitigating factors or particulars about it – and despite the particulars of what she claims ‘abuse’ to avoid. There simply is no qualifying it. If she feels abused it is abuse, and don’t worsen the situation by asking her to qualify it.
Claims of prior abuse are the perfect tool for women to explain past sexual indiscretions as well as to explain frigidity with a husband or a boyfriend, even those with whom she’d been sexual with before. Needless to say, this is a very useful tool for explaining and excusing women’s Hypergamous impulses and concurrent behaviors, however, I should note that the ‘abuse’ social convention will become less and less tenable as Open Hypergamy becomes more widespread and embraced.
For Beta men – Blue Pill men plugged into the narrative of unqualified female victimhood – there is a very real risk of becoming trapped in a cycle of White Knighting against the evils of ‘typically masculine’ men who would ‘abuse’ his princess while simultaneously reinforcing his Beta status in avoiding the perception of being an ‘abuser’ himself.
Knights Against Abuse
The men and boys I detail in Promise Keepers are prime examples of this looping presumption of abuse. For the most, these men had, or understood that they had, “abusive” fathers whom they swore never to emulate in their adult lives. While that abusiveness may or may not be factual the impression of it is what molds that man’s life, but at the same time predisposes him to the Savior Schema that only cements him into a personal life founded in Blue Pill White Knight heroics.
There develops an internal conflict for these heroes of abuse because their dedication to themselves as their own Mental Point of Origin will always be compromised by a Blue Pill conditioned responsibility of supportiveness for women. For the patient, waiting Beta, the man who’s played by what he believes are the rules for the better part of his teens and 20s, there is a unique anger he experiences when his ‘dream girl’ (or one that closely aligns with that ideal) isn’t sexual with him in the way he’s imagined women are with men during their 20s.
She’s come to him in her Epiphany Phase and after all the sexual indiscretions and self-discovery of her 20s, she finally wants to “do things right” by making him wait to have sex (so he won’t think she’s easy) and when they do it’s inhibited or becomes so once he’s locked into emotional or marital commitment with her. Now add to this the presumption of, or stated account of, ‘abuse’ she’s experienced in the past with the ‘typical’ men she was discovering herself sexually with.
You might even add the child of one of her former ‘abusers’ into the mix with whom he’s expected to form a paternal bond with. That Beta now hates those ‘abusers’ with more passion than when he was brooding about them banging the girls he wanted to fuck in his 20s because they ruin women in both the short and long term to him. They’ve ruined his girl for him now that she’s come to her senses and chosen him to pair with “forever”.
Now she’s a mess, a mess he’s expected to untangle and heal and reconstruct into something resembling the sexual dream girl he’s convinced she used to be, and all because of that “Bro”, the abuser, they guy(s) she had to discover for herself she ‘really didn’t need in her life’.
She’s damaged goods, but to that Beta, she’s blameless in her having been “abused” because she didn’t know any better that ‘typical’ men, the ones she chose, would abuse her. Now their abuses are his problems and he’s reminded of that every time she cries when he initiates sex with her.
The Utility of Damaged Goods
In this context, the social convention that is “abuse” becomes another form of insurance of Hypergamy for women. That presumption of blameless abuse locks Beta providers into a Dream Killers schema to the point that they will prioritize the healing of their ‘abused’ princess, the one who would otherwise be his dream girl, above his own imperatives, aspiration and goals in order to prove his quality as a supporter of women.
For women, the assurances that the social convention of ‘abuse’ represents also comes with a measure of internal conflict. From the Alpha Fucks side of Hypergamy, her subconscious hates the idea of being obligated to fuck her Beta Bucks provider, but again, subconsciously, she needs (or feels she needs) his support, provisioning, and emotional availability. However, for all of his self-evincing support, comfort and emotional investment in being a “better man” than the nebulous ‘abusers’ of her past, those anti-seductive aspects only serve to remind and confirm to her that he ‘doesn’t get it‘ and she’s obligated to be intimate and affectionate in a seemingly genuine way if she’s to maintain the provisional relationship.
The default presumption of ‘abuse’ fills the need for a buffer between reconciling the Hypergamous want of an Alpha lover and the provisional, emotional need for a Beta’s resources and comforts. The DeadBedrooms and MarriedRedPill subredds (not to mention the MMSL forums) are littered with the stories of men who discovered (sometimes secretly) how sexual their ‘abused’ wives were in their Party Years or what their wives’ real sexual appetites were for other men after their divorce.
Now, as I close here, let me state that I’m not discounting the real possibilities of actual cases of abuse among women. I have no doubt I’ll generate a slew of disgruntled comments from women relating their personal tragedies in today’s comment thread, but my point in this essay isn’t to question women’s legitimate claims of abuse. Rather it is to lay bare the utility invested in presuming the legitimacy of abuse whenever a woman even hints at the possibility of it by crying before sex or any number of other behaviors or mental states that would be affirmed or excused by just the claim.
She crys when he wants to fuck her because she was “sexually abused” in past relationships ! , what we’ve got here, is , a severe case of an alpha widow.
And the FI demand that men becomes sympathetic to her tortured Confused “tingles”.
Re: Abuse – As I noted earlier in the comment thread, I have been subjected to real abuse so am sensitive to when people claim abuse. My experiences with woman have almost always been that their stories vary all over the place. The embellish, they minimize, they are imprecise but cover it all up with emotions. If you press them, they cry. It’s very hard to get to the truth of it. Consider sweet LeeLee upthread. Look at the elliptical way she describes the abuse – we still have no idea what her father did or didn’t do. This isn’t… Read more »
” . . . Schumer would just be snarky boner killer.”
That’s why God invented duct tape.
And brown paper bags.
So basically, a claim of ‘abuse’ works to smooth over any glitches in the matrix.
@Anonymous: You have some harsh realities to face.
1. A divorce may mean you have to buy your way out. If you’re not willing to do that, you don’t have a good enough reason to divorce.
2. Your sexual past is a big part of why your marriage has failed. It can’t be undone. A long course of abstinence may make a small difference.
3. Focus your energy on a spiritual overhaul. That is the only thing that can save you.
But Greg Hardy was accused of domestic violence. He reportedly threw his gf on a couch full of semi-automatic weapons and threatened to kill her. He says he would never, ever do such a thing, but a judge disagreed and set him up for a trial/formality.
Tend to believe Hardy, myself. Doing that kind of stuff might scratch the finish on the guns…
Anonymous April 5th, 2016 at 7:53 am “Well I see that indeed you are not willing to give me any true advice” I’m perfectly willing to do that…GET A DIVORCE. Shouldn’t be to difficult since you haven’t got any children and have no desire to. The only real reason you’re with him (own admission) is financial. Continuing this disfunctional relationship will only result in more pain when this nonsense inevitably will end. The start of the end will problably be your infidelity (in case you haven’t already?). You definitely sound like an unfaithful wife – emotionally divorced/divorcing looking for rationalisations.… Read more »
Aaaaannnnnnndddd – Blaximus wins teh Internetz!
This is what abuse in the mind of so many deranged women.
“the weirdest part is how women suffer little social shame or consequence for this kind of behavior.”
This blaming victim behavior is rewarded and encouraged.Don’t feel like the lone ranger if it happens to you.You are now the collateral damage of a society protecting women from their own protectors.
@Rollo: that’s a gem of an image you put heading the article. “The shadow on the wall is what is . . .” Excellent allusion.
whew! The schumer talk….*gags*
Now for something completely different –
Garbage in garbage out. There are better things to listen to than that shit. You are not listening to the same radio talk shows I am. A lot of our perceptions about the world and sociology are formed by the company we keep and the social environment we choose to operate in. Maybe tune the AM band to conservative talk radio and you will not hear nearly as much of that bullshit. Before you poo poo conservative talk radio, think it “not cool” or that it is “not popular”, read this http://www.talkers.com/top-talk-radio-audiences/. The largest segment of the listening population is… Read more »
Hello to you too.
Um, did you read the post? It’s not all about radio, there’s a message.
You okay bro?
U mad or something?
NBTM – Look!!!^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
It’s Kate and she’s dancing for you!!!!
” Tend to believe Hardy, myself. Doing that kind of stuff might scratch the finish on the guns…”
I dislike Hardy, but I dislike white knighting media even more.
Ray Rice punched his girl on camera in an elevator. She forgave him, asked the NFL and media not to ruin his life over a private matter, then she married him.
Ray Rice can’t get a job deflating footballs for the patriots.
Damn, there’s a time in my life I would have been one of those blue pill guys. “Oh, if you don’t want to talk about it that’s okay. I’ll wait. After all, we promised until death do us part, remember?”
These days it would be more like “You need to get this shit squared away, and I’m not waiting forever.” In my experience “I can’t talk about it” really means “Our relationship is pretty much over, but you’ve got nice stuff and I haven’t found anyone new yet.”
Lets just say if Hardy did do it the next guy will have to throw her down on some rocket launchers and grenades just to give some tingles.
@Blax – Ray Rice and his wife had a mutually physically abusive relationship with each other. When the NFL first looked into it, they behaved appropriately and forwarded it to the courts. It was referred to family court because of the mutual nature of their physical abuse of each other and the court did a proper intervention, wrt anger managment, conflict management and counseling for both of them. Many marriages that are “abusive” actually involve both parties. It’s only when an insanely White Knighting public got hold of the tapes did the NFL revisit it. It was only then that… Read more »
” On the tape she is hitting him and attacks him again before he pops her. He didn’t even hit her that hard. Bitch has a glass jaw.”
It was kinda amazing how it all blew up. Even commentators that didn’t tow the line got suspended.
I even watched what I said…. okay, that’s bullshit, because….
Look what NBTM has been reduced to, lol. Rollo and the TRM crew are wearing him down to a nub.
It got quiet here…lol Aight, I get to catch up a little. Y’all notice how fast the comments build? Good stuff. Megawit – ” Although your blog is one of the few with a shrewd understanding of the female psyche, Rollo, I find that your constant ‘us vs. them’ subtext is getting a little tiresome. Tiresome? Really? You realize that one sentence is a contradiction, right? Your use of extreme examples to explain everyday sexual struggles between women and men just doesn’t compute for me. what do you consider ” extreme examples”? site and explain please Where are all these… Read more »
So I go to the best liquor store around to grab my father a birthday gift yesterday. 15-foot walls filled with a dizzying array of whatever the hell its owner – a friendly, knowledgeable Sikh – can get his hands on. When he’s behind the counter I’ll buy whatever the fuck he says I should and have yet to regret it. My father is usually a scotch sorta guy – the smokier the better – but bourbon gives you a better whiskey for your dollar if you know what you’re up to Stateside and I’m not playing in the $100+… Read more »
Uncanny article, that doesn’t underestimate the sheer utility of this female tool. Over the years I have been literally slapped by the pattern revealed by several partners. The most recent episode involved claims of suppressed memories, and if you have skimmed literature on suppressed memory hypnosis, you can picture my sceptical expression.
I responded with “What do I do with that?” Which earned me a change of subject. The feeling of “being played” is rotten.
Fun fact: So I found out recently that my sister finally divorced her high school alpha a year or two back after his drug use, violent behavior, and eventually his affair with one of his underage students convinced her maybe it was time to leave. Classy guy. I know. He and I nearly came to blows a few times over the years until I stopped dealing with my sister. So apparently after the divorce, he steals a gun, breaks in to my sister’s house, and threatens to kill her at stolen gun point if she doesn’t come back to him.… Read more »
i just wanted to point out that you COULD have had a hb7.5 getting you ice…so, you wouldn’t even have to get up out of your chair…lol
I always find this segment a good reminder for men considering dropping everything for a woman.
Don’t forget that Ray Rice was acting in self-defense. He’s small too at 5’8″. She’s nearly his size. A 170 pound sister can lay your eyeball open if she’s swinging with a jeweled ring. Who knows how many times she’d wailed on him before? This wasn’t JJ Watt knocking out Jennifer Aniston or something.
Sun Wukong: I don’t know what the qualifications for “family judge” are beyond “breathing” but for some years now it’s been obvious to me they aren’t very high.
It’s not easy being the white sheep of the family, the only adult in the room (regardless of chronological age), either. Remember the first rule of lifesaving – don’t let someone who is drowning get too close / grab you.
For the guy above talking about all the blue pill in TV, I say that you just have to drop it outright. Pop culture is over for you. Go back 50, 80 or 100 years in novels. Even if a movie is decent, your own mind will ruin it by scanning for blue pill boilerplate. Most movies will disappoint you anyway. It’s over. For the guy misreading invading immigrant Muslims as ‘stronger gene alphas’…I just get so tired of stinky, 80 IQ losers being mistaken for alpha studs. Half of them are pedophiles. ‘Alpha Machmoud’ is a trope that just… Read more »
“For the guy above talking about all the blue pill in TV, I say that you just have to drop it outright. Pop culture is over for you. Go back 50, 80 or 100 years in novels.” I unplugged the TV when A&E cancelled Nero Wolfe and replaced it with some reality show or other. If you haven’t seen it, check it out. Possibly the highest production value (and thus expensive to make) TV show ever. And it’s based on novels that go back 50, 80 years ago (first book published in 1934, the last in 1975). “Still a boy,… Read more »
Our justice system could be worse (at least we have one I guess) but like any huge bureacratic system it strains heavy under perverse incentives, technicalities, and highly-jaded actors.
Humans kinda suck at being objective or fair. I’ve heard that the chance a judge will grant an eligible inmate parole depends very heavily on whether or not they’ve had lunch recently.
Preaching to the choir, bro. Just had a friend ask what I was going to do now that I know about it.
“Verify it. Other than that, not a goddamn thing unless I see her start making smart moves. Never try to save someone that isn’t trying to save their self, otherwise they’re just gonna take you down with them.”
I got plenty of my own shit to deal with until then.
And yes, I did verify his arrest and the charges.
On a totally different note,
Mike Cernovitch just wrote a post on making podcasts successful. He’s sensible, per usual.
Women are fully capable of using logic and making a legitimate points when it aligns with their own interests. No argument on that one. Only we do not use logic to fuck women all we need is a hard dick. It is only much later that the women realize that they have already been had. Men seem not to suffer any emotional baggage from earlier sexual encounters (before they got married). They seem to do just fine. In earlier times young women had protection like social conventions and moral codes imposed on them by society that kept them away from… Read more »
Amy Schumer’s mouth is worse than a cats arsehole, all bitter and twisted, and what’s worse, the fat hoe ain’t even funny…
@Rollo and others: interesting new study (a meta survey combining results from many other studies) that suggests that the cuckoldry rate among humans is much lower than previously thought: http://arstechnica.com/science/2016/04/cuckoldry-is-incredibly-rare-among-humans/ TL:DR: New research suggests that the percentage of men (unknowingly) raising children who aren’t their own is only around 1-2%, as opposed to the 10-30% figure previously accepted over decades. Reasons are unclear – the first hypothesis was that birth control may have reduced the *pregnancy* rates of women but not the infidelity rate – but apparently the 1-2% figure holds steady going back centuries, so that can’t be it.… Read more »
“For example, when I first detailed the situation of the woman and her husband ” shows twice in the text probably a leftover of a change in text.
@Culum – I saw the article on ARSTechnica as well, here’s the article published that it’s based on. http://www.cell.com/pb-assets/journals/trends/ecology-evolution/tree2086.pdf A few thoughts. – It would be interesting for some of our more scientific friends here to comment on the method they are using to determine patrilineage. – It is a meta-study and often that approach can suffer from inconsistent sampling, collection and analytical methods being deployed. That said, I couldn’t find any information about how the sampling was done so I’m not saying it is problematic. – They populations are in different geographies, but in each case very local –… Read more »
@ Culum The flaws lie in the definition of cuckoldry and the desire for or ability to get genetic testing done. A bird doesn’t build a nest to raise another birds young. When the strange bird lays eggs in the nest and they are unknowingly incubated this is cuckoldry. When those eggs hatch and the young are fed this becomes open cuckoldry,as they have different food preferences,learn to fly differently,vary in size shape and markings. As the nesting bird has formed a bond trough incubation and care they will continue to see this through with varying results. This flaw of… Read more »
“Namaste, you imbecilic hump”
Is that really necesarry? I was under the impression this was a place for intelligent discourse. Perhaps I’m wrong.
Consider toning down the big-boy posturing & save your frustrations for whomever it is that won’t put out.
@Megawit – Consider getting that your pose is annoying as shit and that you aren’t the tone police here, nor as smart as you seem to think.
Funny how you try to make it about me not getting laid. What’s your “N”?
Damaged Goods: Unfaithful….bored wife with the beta provider husband meets alpha lover artist… you know the rest by heart…..
Here’s hypergamy in action:
This is what a girl will do for you if your value is high…”You take me to the best places” she coos as he bangs her in a toilet stall while her friends ponder lunch options.
@Culum: the new study is short so I read it. I didn’t spot any obvious issues with the methodology or sampling but I am not an expert. As Scribblerg suggests, I suspect that historic society’s anti-cuckolding mechanism were working well enough to prevent / dissuade women, and punish those that were caught (I think it wasn’t unusual for the cheating women to be killed by the husband and for that to be socially acceptable or even expected, which is certainly not socially accepted currently). Let me put it this way: if the anti-cuckolding mechanisms weren’t working and obstructing female hypergamy,… Read more »
“Funny how you try to make it about me not getting laid. What’s your “N”?”
Why does this matter? Get past this issue, it’s holding you back man. What if his N is great than yours? what if he is having hot sex as much as he wants with whoever he wants? How does this relate to you?
Yareally has never posted his N count… think about that.
You are not where you claim to want to be. Focus on that. Nothing else matters.
Rooting for you to get past this trap you have made for yourself.
Abstracts of some of the references in the new survey, which are not historical, so affected by modern culture and modern birth control:
2006 study shows large difference of EPP between fathers with high confidence of paternity (around 2%) and fathers with low confidence (around 30%)
2012 estimate of Germany EPP, under 1%, statistics 971 fathers (states similar rate in Switzerland)
2008 meta survey of decline of EPP with birth control, suggests a small decline of EPP with birth control, supports that EPP is and was below 10%
‘presumed abuse’, reminds me of a recent Vox Day + Stefan Molyneux youtube video, where I hear the phrase, “Female False Accusation Machine”.
I hope to soon incorporate it into any blue or purple conversations I run into, like, “Oh him? Didn’t he get chewed up in that whole Female False Accusation Machine”…perhaps with a touch of “supported by the trial lawyers”
CDC: 4,025,933 births
American Assoc of Blood Banks: 46 of 79 polled (2 BB European) report 90,227 paternity exclusions
90.227 / 4.025.933 = 2.24%
Just more piling on here………But yes it’s inevitable in a divorce that a women plays the “Abuse” card as my ex did when she demanded divorce. It’s like all of a sudden I was an abusive SOB when there it was never even mentioned in the past. Unless there is still a sliver of attraction towards you you will be labeled an abuser to your close friends and family. It gets so bad that she actually believes it in her hampsterized brain. Such is the way with women……………
Seem to encounter a lot of ‘posturing’ on blogs & forums, not so much in person… funny how that always seems to work out. Anyway, back to the point: I was merely saying that the more you make it about a ‘fight’ between men & women, the more energy you lose in getting all huffed up about it, ergo the less FRAME you are left with. Don’t give feminism the pleasure of your discontent. I have (luckily) only once encountered a woman who claimed ‘abuse’, after a drunken session – I confronted her in person about it, in a calm… Read more »
@Megawit, one of the risks I, or really anyone in the ‘sphere takes when they provide an overview of intersexual dynamics, the nature of women, the social implications and the psychology involved, is giving the perception of some unhealthy, obsessive interest. As if I or anyone else, just by discussing or analyzing the things I do, necessarily implies that this is ALL I do, or the ‘sphere spends too much time devoted to contemplating feminism. When you go to McDonalds do you say, “well, fuck these guys are totally obsessed with burgers and fries, WTF? Obviously they’re obsessed with junk… Read more »
TuffLuv: Spot on. I went thru every single step of that with my ex over a decade ago. And you will have Lawyers (working as part of the Female False Accusation Machine [FFAM]), your OWN lawyers, try to White Knight you. While as a father/man, you are never going to “win” per se, things turned around for me in the ensuing years when it came to some other post-divorce issues, and I started rabidly attacking her in some of the very few ways society will accept (an accusation against her by other women, alleging abuse–all which occurred, etc). I “outed”… Read more »
lets be real,who in their right mind would choose a name like “ars” technica?Is Annalee Newitz an alias to go along with ars?
Don’t they know ars is spelled with an e?
This misleading headline”cuckoldry is rare among humans”,followed by a misrepresentation of cuckoldry as unknowingly raising children that aren’t theirs!
Give me a break who would take this seriosly? Maybe a hamster spinning a web of rationalization
Probably somebody familiar with Latin.
“It gets so bad that she actually believes it in her hampsterized brain.” I’ve posted about the only truth to a woman is emotion… came across a great corollary to that today, courtesy of Thin Man who posts on Sedfast (and is one of the most interesting posters, especially if you are an older guy)… his view Woman are consummate fantasists, if you arouse her sexuality and then create a vacuum with your absence, her mind being a meaning creation machine, will begin to spin scenarios around you. http://www.pua-zone.com/showthread.php?15829-Realizations-(ATTN-ijjjjji-hangman-TVA-BD-Pelusita-PE-TTM-Bacchus)&p=167694&viewfull=1#post167694 so true, a meaning creation machine, interpreting emotion (chemical reactions)… you… Read more »
@ Sun Wukong
I recant my misunderstanding of their target audience,and nothing else.
I finally viewed Ingmar Bergman’s 1966 masterpiece – “Persona” last night (you can find it with English subtitles). The movie is about deeply personal issues as depicted by the interplay between the actresses – Liv Ulmann and Bibi Andersson, and this singular interplay makes up almost the entire bulk of the movie. These two actresses are stunningly superb in their roles. This Ingmar Bergman obviously was very very insightful about human nature, and his insights about women in particular, that he unfolds for us in this film, is handled with sensitivity, respectfulness and brutal harshness all at the same time… Read more »
It wouldn’t surprise me if the actual rate of non-paternity is around 2-3% today, with higher spikes in some communities. With birth control and abortion, this makes sense. What we are looking at is more infidelity among women, but lesser fecundity of such infidelity, which makes sense in an era where almost all sex is not fecund by choice. In the sphere we tend to use the word “cucking” as a synonym for infidelity, which is fine as a shorthand, but most of the cheating isn’t fecund by design. It’s where the “good genes” strategy gets short-circuited by the current… Read more »
DFW escort… 19YO. advertising online at back pages (jeezzz!)…
Damaged Goods in the making or some guys special snowflake or both?
At 35 what will she remember and who will she blame?
“but most women want to avoid pregnancy most of the time”
and there is the heart of the problem. women wanting to avoid the very thing they were born to do
the question is why
@Sentient — Pretty clearly damaged goods already if she’s escorting at 19. As promiscuous as many women have become, and as much as the independent escorting business has ballooned with the internet and the disintermediation of the business, most women who do cross that line are still quite damaged by the time they make that decision, and it’s one that damages them even further over the longer term. It’s a whole different level than the girl who gets drunk and has a ONS with a hot guy at the club — getting paid money to have sex with strangers to… Read more »
Novaseeker… I hear you, that is a pretty trad view of the situation. But the more I run into girls like this (or hotter – rate her 7-7.5) these days who are doing this I find it really is just thrill seeking for them, that they are mostly fucking guys they would fuck anyway (they have so many requests they can sift through them) and they like the cash and free time… LOL. They have all been pretty cool as well (never screwed one, just enjoy talking with them in bars)… I’m sure she is just about as regular a… Read more »
“and there is the heart of the problem. women wanting to avoid the very thing they were born to do
the question is why”
Really? You know the answer…
@Novaseeker: the new meta-study / survey linked by Scribblerg (originally mentioned in the Ars Technica article linked by Culum) includes not references to post-birth control studies (I linked 3 of the references) but also references pre-birth control studies (the methodologies used for this are described in the new survey). They also generally reported sub 3% “cuckolding”, in line with modern numbers. What may have happened is that pre birth-control, those societies anti-cuckolding mechanisms did work, and whatever FI was around was powerless or not powerful enough to “convince” the “patriarchy” to abolish the anti-cuckolding methods as without the birth-control, higher… Read more »
More likely I would say it’s a product of cheating being completely hidden with the advent of birth control. You don’t get a choice as to whether you accept it; she’s going to do it either way now because she can get away with it. Whether the grip loosened or not, I figure the arrangement would start coming apart as an inevitability.
@ Sentient “Really? You know the answer…” I really don’t. what could override millions of years of mammalian wiring and instinct? it’s great to be a guy, but I have a hard time imagining what it would feel like to be able to create new life from the cells of your body, grow it inside you and then deliver it into the world. what could make a woman want to avoid the miracle of creation? and what happens between their early teens when they seem to be driven by and embracing of that instinct (I got three teens pregnant, all… Read more »
@Sun: It is pretty clear that society in general is accepting female promiscuity and infidelity much more than 50, 100, 150 years ago. Even Blue Pill men know about it to some extent. Girl’s nights out, unmarried women going to hotels with men, and any other such situations where women get themselves (unsupervised) into situations where “it just happened” would have been heavily restricted by men AND by other women back in the day. Perhaps more or less as it happens currently in countries with Sharia Law? I don’t know. And while certainly it was possible for infidelity to occur,… Read more »
“what could make a woman want to avoid the miracle of creation?”
Women are to be led. For the last 100 years they have been led by feminism. They follow. They take what they don’t want or need because they follow.
feminism destroys the west via women.
You can see this in your own life, if you are strong and lead your woman will follow you.
@Sentient — That’s interesting. I wonder why the higher value guys that a 7.5 would fuck for fun would be looking to pay her to do it — why not just pick her up at the club? Things may have changed a lot, I guess, but in the not too recent past hookers had two kinds of clients: (1) lower value unmarried guys and (2) married guys. If it’s the case now that high value unmarried guys are using escorts a lot, that would be an interesting development, because these are the same guys she would fuck anyway, as you… Read more »
@IAS — That makes sense. The old regime sort of worked because of the harsh penalties against cuckolding and the fact that it was harder to hide, whereas today, we have a more lax social system when it comes to sex, but we also have easily available technology to make the results of sex totally opt-in. That could explain relatively constant, and low, cuckoldry rates, with the reasons, of course, being very different in very different contexts. Infidelity has gone up — both due to the more relaxed social rules about it, as well as the technology being able to… Read more »
@ Sentient “Women are to be led.” agree. and they are led by their own instincts, good instincts, up until a certain point. then they take the pill. how does an idea (feminism), and a nonsensical idea at that, swoop in and in less than a century override many many many centuries of biological and community experience? and if women are led, then it’s men doing the leading, which means men are embracing feminism, giving their daughters birth control pills and destroying their own civilization. so I guess the question is why are men committing slow-motion suicide via feminism when… Read more »
Sharia Law suppresses (actualized) female hypergamy. It’s enforced by everyone in the culture to ensure a variety of things, from virginity (for the most part), to correct paternity, to reducing adultery to basic slutery.
Under Sharia Law, men typically get custody of their children after divorce as well (depending on age, other factors).
Men run things in Muslim countries, I don’t care how many times folks in the manosphere say Muslim men are blue pill or whatever. We never forgot women’s nature.
Part of me agrees with MegaWit, but in Rollo’s defense he’s trying to write a blog post every week about a fairly narrow idea: Problem: Betas get fucked over by society. Solution: Don’t be that guy. BIG problem. No doubt about that, but the solution is HERE for every man to take advantage of. The fact that there is a solution is just fucking amazing. The fact that you can realize your potential as a man. We have COMPLETE control of our destiny. What is there not to be excited about? I don’t know… A little bit more positivity couldn’t… Read more »
“Problem: Betas get fucked over by society.”
betas are society.
Problem: betas get fucked over by themselves.
how do you get a guy to stop fucking himself over?
“how do you get a guy to stop fucking himself over?”
I don’t know we’ve got a bunch of smart people here that understand marketing and human psychology. Maybe we can think of a way to break through that social conditioning so that they see the truth instead of just waiting here for guys to get divorce raped or mentally fucked up by a BPD. Complaining about it is not going to do a fucking thing.
“how does an idea (feminism), and a nonsensical idea at that, swoop in and in less than a century override many many many centuries of biological and community experience?” It is fascinating, usually has something to do with the promise of some better state/utopia/power… This being one version – “The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die! 5″For God knows that in the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 6 When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that… Read more »
And they all laughed at Archie Bunker…
One thing that the “She was likely abused” crowd can never seem to rationalize is the period where said chick fucked like a nympho on speed…and then went “Oh, right…I was abused. I must shut the sex down IMMEDIATELY!” The “I can’t fuck now b/c I was abused” doesn’t make any sense at all.
@Mega – No, that is not what you were saying. What you said in your last comment I agree with – don’t let feminism wrinkle your shorts, sure, got it. Your first comment implied that it’s not accurate to see male and female sexual strategies as in conflict with each other, yet they are. Forgive the intemperate retort, but try and get how many people come prancing in here trying to claim the Rollo is caught up in some false dyad or demonizing women when he is not. Rollo has a maxim he states which goes something like this. ‘For… Read more »
“Men are not leading… they embraced feminism and allowed it and women to lead.”
why, at the pinnacle of civilization, at the point of realization of everything man hoped to achieve (control over his food supply, his living conditions) did man abdicate responsibility to woman?
why did he decide to eat the fruit?
On the cuckoldry “study”, bear in mind that the definition they are exploring here is one where men are “unknowingly” raising the progeny of another man. They conveniently ignore the genomic evidence that shows roughly 80% of women bred with 20% of men in our evolutionary past (including Neanderthals), but the basis of the study is flawed because they ask the wrong question. Cuckoldry isn’t strictly confined to duplicitous women duping husbands into believing the kid is theirs when it’s some other guy’s. Consider the marked increase in single motherhood since the sexual revolution, the statistic for abortion, the declining… Read more »
“what could make a woman want to avoid the miracle of creation?”
Control and power.
“… so why pay for it?”
Control and power.
” . . . a 7.5 . . .”
She gets a personal preference bonus point from me. Maybe even a point and half.
I do have one suggestion for her, and the girls like her:
If you’re going to go blonde, have a professional who knows what they’re doing do it for you, and then take the time, trouble and expense to maintain it.
@Forge at 8:17p sorry, bro…didn’t mean to push you down… my goal is helping you ‘forward’… (and i just wanted to point out that you could still get the ice yourself…lol) the FI sucks…and EVERY time you are in situ with a cute girl (or even just a ‘boner test pass’…) and that voice in the back of your head says ‘nah…maybe next time’…or ‘the social energy is wrong somehow…’ = that’s the FI pushing on you…to your detriment… and bc of that the social energy is never going to be ‘right’… at least as long as your mental point… Read more »
http://therationalmale.com/2011/08/23/schedules-of-mating/ For a female of any species to facilitate a methodology for breeding with the best genetic partner she’s able to attract AND to ensure her own and her offspring’s survival with the best provisioning partner; this is an evolutionary jackpot. The Cuckold On some level of consciousness, men innately sense something is wrong with this situation, though they may not be able to place why they feel it or misunderstand it in the confusion of women’s justifications for it. Or they become frustrated by the social pressures to ‘do the right thing’, are shamed into martyrdom/savior-hood and committed to… Read more »
Why did he decide to eat the fruit?
Maybe a combination of demographics,numbers of men vs women combined with 80/20 giving rise to pedestalizing the poontang,coupled with the sex sells saturation of media that recieves to much attention due to an abundance of resources,for starters.
She’s also been modelling since she was 14; that’ll damage a girl pretty good:
It isn’t just that sleeping around used to be frowned on and acted against, up until recently no one went anywhere. Studies of cuckold rates in small towns in the arse end of nowhere with populations in the thousands at most don’t help us look at the modern world at all. My question would be to find out what are the cuck rates in cities, such as they were way back when. It might be that all the women were looking for alpha once per month, and looking is all they could do because there was no one to see.… Read more »
Re: Cuckoldry – Let me play even looser with it. What about the man who marries a divorced women with kids and steps in and plays Dad? Is he not volunteering to be a cuckold? What about the guy (like me) who’s wife left to pursue her sexual options while she still could but left me still paying the bills? Was I not paying for her best-gene seeking options, paying for a child that I didn’t get to raise? Is this just not another turn of the cuckoldry die? In either case I’m paying but not raising my own child.… Read more »
Damn KFG you are right… same girl – aka Super Girl Megan doing frickin incall… she has 4.8 MILLION Igram followers…
Take a look at her BF gents… and yet…
“Adam received the command concerning the tree before Eve was made. He ate the fruit from her hand in order to share her fate, whatever that was going to be, because he loved her.” – some bible nerd lol. “love” or put another way, lack of an abundance mentality as Eve was literally the only woman on earth. Adam is not the first man, but the first beta? a 2600 year old warning against pedestalizing? a neolithic warning against putting woman’s wishes first? the rise of agriculture/”civilization” coincides with the rise of the beta? feminism was inevitable because the moment… Read more »
Bearing in mind that just because her photo goes with the ad doesn’t mean it’s the same girl; there’s a lot of bait and switch that goes in that industry.
On the other hand, a lot of young models do leverage their nascent celebrity for extra cash and prizes.
@Scribblerg: I don’t mean to be overly-vague. It’s just that he’s still alive, and I feel like I owe him an in-person confrontation over this before I talk publicly in an open way about it. And like I said, he’s not a horrible person. He’s helped me in a lot of ways in my adult life and I value my relationship with him. And so I don’t want to confront him, because I don’t want to mess things up over things that happened 20 years ago, even though they inhibit my ability to be a normal human being every day.… Read more »
“why, at the pinnacle of civilization, at the point of realization of everything man hoped to achieve (control over his food supply, his living conditions) did man abdicate responsibility to woman?
why did he decide to eat the fruit?”
Well who fed “him” the fruit and told him to eat it? Who benefited from it the most?
We have all coming together Marxism, the 16th Amendment, Federal Reserve, WWI, the 19th Amendment… the growing political class… growing government bureaucracy in the 1930’s
See a pattern? who benefited?
@scribblerg April 6th, 2016 at 9:25 am “Rollo has a maxim he states which goes something like this. ‘For one sex’s sexual strategy to succeed, the other’s must be thwarted’ (he says it better and i’m too busy to look it up right now). This is axiomatic. Also, commenter @SJF had very interesting cites a while back as to how female sexuality has resistance built into its very nature – @SJF, do you have those to hand? Female resistance is part of seduction and men overcoming that is in itself a demonstration of high value. At its essence, seduction is… Read more »
Yeah I was thinking the same thing, might be the case of a girl who thinks she looks like the model grabs her Igram pics..
This is from the back page, the only one that kind of does not look the same, looking at the thighs…
” . . . a 2600 year old warning against pedestalizing?”
I think that’s made pretty explicit:
“Because you listened to your wife and ate fruit from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat from it . . .”
@MistralMistral “One thing that the “She was likely abused” crowd can never seem to rationalize is the period where said chick fucked like a nympho on speed…and then went “Oh, right…I was abused. I must shut the sex down IMMEDIATELY!” The “I can’t fuck now b/c I was abused” doesn’t make any sense at all.” The nympho-on-speed thing is a function of a fractured personality. This is key to understanding damaged girls. Our personalities are not singular entities, we have an inner community of personalities that interact and switch off with each other as needed. A healthy person can manage… Read more »