We interrupt your regular Rational Male blog reading for an important news bulletin. TRM sources confirm that a comprehensive list of aspects of the “Modern Man” has at last been identified by Brianna Brian Lombardi for the New York Times. Yes, you read that correctly, click-bait reliable sources have indeed confirmed the recognizable traits of the Modern Herb Man.
After a preschool upbringing replete withĀ Cailou, heavily steeped in feminized gender self-loathing during his tween years, and topped off with a healthy dash of transgender reassignment therapy, a list of traits has finally been compiled to aid in women’s identifying an adult ‘Modern Man’.
I know, I know ladies, it’s a very difficult task to identify an acceptable guy for your Epiphany Phase necessities. What with ‘dating’ ALLĀ “the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys“, it can be a daunting challenge to remember the characteristics that made all of the Nice Guys you blew off in your youthĀ such a great catch,ā¦timing is such a bitch, but now you’re ready to do things “the right way this time”, right?
The good news is they’ve all been waiting for you, like you asked them to way back when; and while their feminine conditioning has finally made them desirable for your just-pre-Wall long-term security necessity,Ā they have gotten older and a bit more peculiar. No worries, Brittany Brian Lombardi has compiled a list for you so you can better discern he and his fellow ‘Modern Men’ today from the guys you proposed “lets just be friends” to ten years ago.
Lets have a look shall we?
1. When the modern man buys shoes for his spouse, he doesnāt have to ask her sister for the size. And he knows which brands run big or small.
Yes ladies, you’ll no longer be troubled with that hot club guy being callously indifferent to remembering your shoe size. The Modern Man is so identifying with the feminine, so in touch with it, he’s made a hobby of picking up women’s shoes and memorizing the sizes and brandsĀ in your ever growing collection. In fact, you’ll no longer be troubledĀ with the joyĀ hassleĀ of shopping for cute shoes, the Modern Man will do it for you. Now you can get back all the ‘rewarding’ work of advancing your career.
2. The modern man never lets other people know when his confidence has sunk. He acts as if everything is going swimmingly until it is.
You see gals, the Modern Man knows women are far too burdened by the Patriarchy to ever consider a man’s acknowledgement of his own degree of self-confidence. In fact, his feminine conditioning has taught him well that no one is really concerned with his ‘privileged’ cis-centric concepts of male confidence. He knows the preconceptions of confidence only leads to actualizing his potential for violence. Far better to put a smile on his face and tangle with his inner demons without his concerning you overly much, don’t you think?
3. The modern man is considerate. At the movie theater, he wonāt munch down a mouthful of popcorn during a quiet moment. He waits for some ruckus.
Walking on eggshells around women is the hallmark of a Modern Man. Rest assured girls, he knows the personal repercussions women will mete out should he commit a social faux pas. Not to worry though, the Modern Man wouldn’t so much as cough during the chick flick he suggested you both see on opening night.
4. The modern man doesnāt cut the fatty or charred bits off his fillet. Every bite of steak is a privilege, and it all goes down the hatch.
Would you look at that ladies? The Modern Man can still promptĀ a tingle by getting back to his caveman roots! You’ll just have to forgive him one uncouth vanity. He’s his own man when it comes to animal fat. That steak and the full beard he’s growing to go with his new flannel shirts (in between shoe shopping for his lady) are his privilege of being a man. Wait, did I say “privilege”? Oh, what a scamp he is, but he’s happy to accommodate you if you want to join his male space. Burp.
5. The modern man wonāt blow 10 minutes of his life looking for the best parking spot. He finds a reasonable one and puts his car between the lines.
The act of parking a car might seem mundane to you, but au contraire. A Modern Man bucks the trend of spending 10 minutes (?) seeking the most perfect parking spot,ā¦unless his lady is riding with him and then it’s a precious gift of the parking lot gods if he can manage a spot by the front entrance to WalMart. He may even do you the courtesy of dropping you off at the entrance and then forages for just the right spot.
6. Before the modern man heads off to bed, he makes sure his spouseās phone and his kidsā electronic devices are charging for the night.
Because, God forbid, his wife or kids might be without their mobile device or social media accounts when they awake the next day. My God! How would they find out what occurred on Instagram while they slept? The Modern Man is so evolved, so limbicly in touch with the feminine mind that her unthought of needs become an obsessive compulsion for him.
7. The modern man buys only regular colas, like Coke or Dr Pepper. If you walk into his house looking for a Mountain Dew, heāll show you the door.
You’ll just have to accept it gals; in addition to his women’s shoes fascination the Modern Man is anĀ aficionado of processed sugar and high fructose corn syrup. So dedicated is he that his palate has becomeĀ sensitive enough to disparage other men for not appreciating ‘real’ soft drinks. But, heheh, that’s just him “being a guy”, they’re soooo odd aren’t they?
8. The modern man uses the proper names for things. For example, heāll say āhelicopter,ā not āchopperā like some gauche simpleton.
The Modern Man has rarely servedĀ his country in the military, so you’ll have to pardon his not understanding the distinction between a ‘helicopter’ and a ‘chopper’. However, beside a slight lisp and some feminine ‘vocal fry‘, the Modern Man’s vernacular is carefully chosen. He uses words like “gauche” and “simpleton” in casual conversation. See this link for more spoken examples.
9. Having a daughter makes the modern man more of a complete person. He learns new stuff every day.
Being a Modern Man requires you to identify more with the feminine, thus having a daughter completes him in ways a son would ever have the capacity too. In the back of his head he feels the nagging third-person guilt for China’s selective breeding practices of the past and hopes to “be the difference he wants to see in the world” by fulfilling the false narratives of the Feminine Imperative by personally investing himself in the ’empowerment’ of little girls at the expense of boys. It comes naturally to the Modern Man after being medicated himself for ADHD in his youth.
10. The modern man makes sure the dishes on the rack have dried completely before putting them away.
Lucky for you ladies, your Modern Man believes in the fantasy that isĀ Choreplay so thoroughly he’ll forego using a modern dishwasher to wash the dishes by hand so you’ll notice how evolved he is. Because everyone knows the “unbridled lust”Ā women feel when they see a man washing dishes by hand. Women agree, he’s practically owed sex at that point.
11. The modern man has never āpinnedā a tweet, and he never will.
Because while the modern man is self-absorbed enough to use Pinterest, only a real solipsist narcissist pins a tweet.
12. The modern man checks the status of his Irish Spring bar before jumping in for a wash. Too small, it gets swapped out.
Ha! How cavalier! Isn’t it nice to have a Modern Man who’s indiscriminate enough to eat the fat and burnt parts of his steak, but is particular enough to toss out a bar of soap when it’s too small?
13. The modern man listens to Wu-Tang at least once a week.
Because how else would he remain in touch with his roots?
14. The modern man still jots down his grocery list on a piece of scratch paper. The market is no place for his face to be buried in the phone.
Yes ladies, you’ll find the Modern Man so engrossed with stereotypically feminine tasks (in an effort to buck a trend he still thinks earns him points with women), he’ll raise grocery shopping to an art form. He’s rustic enough to still use a pad and paper to scribble out his carefully planned grocery list (which of course implies he’s also become an accomplished cook in order to add some value to his SMV). I’ll bet you can just taste the artisanal lasagne from Whole Foods now.
15. The modern man has hardwood flooring. His children can detect his mood from the stamp of his Kenneth Cole oxfords.
The Modern Man loves the sound of his shoes on locally sourced woods beneath his feet so long as he’s not the one who had to install it. Remember, theĀ Modern Man is defined by his shoes (again).
16. The modern man lies on the side of the bed closer to the door. If an intruder gets in, he will try to fight him off, so that his wife has a chance to get away.
Ladies you can sleep better at night knowing your Modern Man has spent the mental energy to position himself between you and any home intrusion. He’s carefully thought it through and accepts his disposability in the light of the odds he’d be easily incapacitated and left to bleed out while watching you be gang raped as his dying memory.
17. Does the modern man have a melon baller? What do you think? How else would the cantaloupe, watermelon and honeydew he serves be so uniformly shaped?
So in touch with his feminine animus is the Modern Man that he often becomes indistinguishable from Martha Stewart in his zeal to entertain his dinner guests. Perfectly shaped melon balls are just one more social anxiety you’ll be freed from with your Modern Man girls.
18. The modern man has thought seriously about buying a shoehorn.
The Modern Man’s obsession with shoes (for either sex) will not be restrictedĀ by size discrepancies.
19. The modern man buys fresh flowers more to surprise his wife than to say he is sorry.
The Modern Man is a virtual florist ladies. His mother and even his female co-workers will never be left out of his boundless consideration. Flowers never come as an apology since there is never a reason for apology with him. Rest assured his niceties come from actually being a Nice Guy and never with the ulterior motive of expectations of intimacy.
20. On occasion, the modern man is the little spoon. Some nights, when he is feeling down or vulnerable, he needs an emotional and physical shield.
Never forget gals, your Modern Man is a sensitive soul, prone to fits of crying when the movie’s sad enough. Should you ever spare an afterthought, remember, that smile on his face is just a placeholder until things are going along swimmingly. Just be sure to remember, when you’re spooning him like a toddler afraid of a thunderstorm, be sure he’s still facingĀ the door side of the bed so he can interpose himself between you and the home intruder.
21. The modern man doesnāt scold his daughter when she sneezes while eating an apple doughnut, even if the pieces fly everywhere.
This should be a no-brainer considering the completedness-of-person he derives from empowering her to the exclusion of boys.
22. The modern man still ambles half-naked down his driveway each morning to scoop up a crisp newspaper.
Yes, gals that rugged individualism is not only expressed in his lack of self-consciousness (unless it’s shoes), but also in his rustic dedication to actually subscribing to a newspaper as it dies a slow media death. That damn paper boy better make sure it arrives ‘crisp’ or no Christmas time tip!
23. The modern man has all of Michael Mannās films on Blu-ray (or whatever the highest quality thing is at the time).
Because, God knows where the Modern Man would be without the ability to re-watch classics like Hancock and the Miami Vice remake in 4K resolution.
24. The modern man doesnāt get hung up on his phoneās battery percentage. If it needs to run flat, so be it.
Sorry ladies, the Modern Man often becomes so overly conscious about your own mobile devices being charged throughout the night that he cavalierly forgets his own cell phone might run flat. You’ll just have to deal with his forgetfulness, but it is for your benefit. 1st World problems, what can you do?
25. The modern man has no use for a gun. He doesnāt own one, and he never will.
Well, at least you can be confident that he’s dedicated to making sure his inevitable death will give you the time needed to escape that home intruder’s malicious intent when the time comes. Just be sure to give him the proper push towards the bedroom door if he happens to be the ‘little’ spoon and feeling vulnerable that night.
26. The modern man cries. He cries often.
Well, finally ladies, you’ve got a guy who can cry on demand,ā¦or is it by demand? But remember this is the next state in men’s evolutionary progress; a response to women’s crying eliciting sympathy and concern. Men’s facility with crying as a go-to response (he cries often) is just evidence of his closer identification and affinity with the feminine. It’s your dream come true! Now your Modern Man can relate to you as well as your closest girlfriends.
27. People arenāt sure if the modern man is a good dancer or not. That is, until the D.J. plays his jam and he goes out there and puts on a clinic.
And finally, you’ve got a new, modern, evolved man who can turn physical spasms into an art form, and have so little self-awareness that the laughter he hears is affirmation instead of ridicule.
Well, there you have it girls, you’ve finally got the men you deserved, the men you helped create, the men who are so in touch with their femininity that you’ll have little use for your gal-pals any more. But that’s OK, right?
The Modern Man has been patiently waiting for you to get the Bad Boys out of your system and he’s evolved enough to accept his retroactive cuckolding forgive your youthful indiscretion. The Modern Man understands that you were “so crazy back in college” and you want to do things right with him. The Modern Man is so in touch with the feminine, so evolved that he’s ready to look past your previous hesitations with him, look past the ease with which you gave it up to the ‘crazy boys, the commitment-phobic boys’; the greater degree of qualifications and your reluctance to jump into bed with him as quick only proves how much you’re changed and how much better he, the Modern Man, must be in relation to all those ‘other guys’.
Just be sure you’re sleeping on the right side of the bed when you do.
How much of the “modern male” debased state in the FI comes from external influences, and how much is it rooted within schemas hammered into them from family and friends? I ask as in some ways the FI is a multi-layered schema, a shell within a shell .Even if a man escapes the horror of a lopsided feminist household-no small feat that- he meets the pervasive influence of the FI at his employer ,on his TV, and with his friends. Its like breaking out of a prison in Siberia. Even if you manage to escape the obvious prison with your… Read more »
” . . . how much is it rooted within schemas hammered into them from family and friends?”
The Tender Years Doctrine gave primacy in the raising of children to women. That’s 200 years of women training their children to support the FI.
Sorry again, but I lol’d
“Would you look at that ladies? The Modern Man can still prompt a tingle by getting back to his caveman roots! Youāll just have to forgive him one uncouth vanity. Heās his own man when it comes to animal fat. That steak and the full beard heās growing to go with his new flannel shirts (in between shoe shopping for his lady) are his privilege of being a man.”
http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/854/098/83f.png
Haha! I modern man’s work is never done…
“I can safely say that one of the women I was dealing with last year was likely a textbook case of actual BPD. Therapist showed me the DSM-IV list (not telling me till after the fact what it was), I was able to say all but one characteristic was a completely accurate description. The real deal is a train wreck of epic proportions. It aināt just crazy. Itās a special, unbelievably manipulative kind of crazy. Truly a sight to behold right away you run screaming away from it.” Speaking from experience, the term BPD gets thrown around far too much… Read more »
@CaveClown, I agree, but when you’ve dealt with a genuine BPD for 4 years you tend to develop an acute sensitivity to them.
http://therationalmale.com/2012/01/20/borderline-personality-disorder/
BPD does get a bit overused in the manosphere, but when the average woman’s mindset and behavior gets closer to that of a real BPD with every generation can you really blame them?
“Speaking from experience, the term BPD gets thrown around far too much in the manosphere.” You don’t say???! So many ‘spherian men seem to view being a normal female as some kind of mental illness. May I just point out that a so called “sane” man wrote this Modern Man article for the NY Times? “26. The modern man cries. He cries often.” Yes and so does his wife. And the modern man than calls her borderline and hysterical because he thinks he’s so perfect and he doesn’t understand why she is crying. It never occurs to him that maybe… Read more »
” You donāt say???! So many āspherian men seem to view being a normal female as some kind of mental illness.”
… This is too easy.
IAS: You are way overplaying this notion that only alphas get to breed. I will never claim to be alpha and have Aspie’s tendencies, but I have more kids than some of the players here. In the USA players tend to not want to knock up their conquests, because the state will make them pay. So unless they have no money anyway, it is birth control sex. Maybe backed up with abortion if the woman wants to continue “having fun.” So the “alpha seed” is not being passed on in the form of progeny. Even most of the players attempt… Read more »
Ok, you might think this is a bit of a stretch, and it really might be. As I read that NYT drivel again it occurred to me this could be a PR plant piece to sell product. It’s like some thing right out of Edward Bernays classic book from the 1928 titled “Propaganda.” Bernays outlines how product placement is injected into editorial copy through means that are not obvious to the reader. The best propaganda is so cleverly done that the reader doesn’t think twice about mentions of fur hats or the latest trends in shoes for metrosexual hipsters. The… Read more »
“A true BPD is quite amazing.” Mine was a purebred – she had papers. Never seen anything like it before or since, although that is partly because I’ve learned to smell them and bail when I get the whiff. “Humans could never have a society where 10% or less of the males mated, because the left out males would revolt with violence.” The Irish like to say that they are all descended from kings, and it happens that they’re right, but there are some reasons for that: 1. The Right of Kings (to bang any woman on her wedding night.… Read more »
“Iāll bet anything Kenneth Cole markets to mamby metros on some level.”
Ya think?:
http://www.kjamson.com/production_old/images/kenneth-cole-men.jpg
Alright, so after a bit of casual rooting around on Google I found a manosphere satirical piece about Kenneth Cole product from a year ago. I don’t think the Kenneth Cole reference in NYT was a coincidence.
http://mattlawrence.net/mankind-kenneth-cole/
It’s a good day for making fun of the garbage from the NYT:
http://mattlawrence.net/19-ways-to-be-a-modern-mangina/
Jesus, people. It’s clearly self-amused, snarky satire intended to provoke emotional reaction, which it certainly did.
I can’t believe the internet has exploded over this dumb shit. The various concernospheres have been supremely rick-rolled by a ‘writer’ who may or may not even be a real person. lol
https://twitter.com/lombardi_brian
Please prove me wrong, somebody. Because…holy fucking hell.
@Roused
That Matt Lawrence modern mangina bit is great. Thanks!
My final note on this. Here’s a priceless blue pill thoughtgem from an Assistant Professor of [strike]Masturbatory Bullshit[/strike] English at University of New Hampshire about the Lombardi NYT piece: [i]”Maybe that’s Lombardi’s point: that men absolutely need to take stock of themselves and seek self-improvement, but shouldn’t expect the process to permit easy answers. At a time when men are being sold, en masse, dangerous dogma online–like “Red Pill” philosophy, or other more inchoate prescriptions endemic to the “manosphere”–Lombardi is telling us that there’s a time for all things, and no perfect solutions. “On occasion,” writes Lombardi, “the modern man… Read more »
P.S. somebody please refresh me as to the html codes here for strikethroughs, italics, bold, etc. and I promise I won’t forget this time around.
Thanks.
I’m so proud to say I know zero about being what NYTimes defines as the “modern man”. In fact I often state how I’m becoming a Neanderthal.
Everyone catch that LGBT rights are a “pilar” of the Hillary campaign? Is this the FI’s continued normalization of homosexuality?
Experimenting.
italic
bold
Ah. Disregard my previous request.
@Striver I am overplaying it a bit, but I was referring to times when there was no birth control of any sort, not today. The 40-50% number you quote is probably based on genetic studies so should be relatively robust, I’m surprised it is higher than 30% which would have been my guess. If you have a link I’d be interested. Today despite all the doom and gloom in the community, due to birth control, I think it is probably a higher % that passes off their genes. So I guess that is the silver lining of birth control for… Read more »
God help me, I am a gay (read: homosexual) male (22) and I just bought your book (The Rational Male)
Frame, Game, Alphas, Plates and little Red Pills.
This shit better work. I’ll want my fucking money back otherwise.
So The modern man isn’t even a “better Beta”. He cries often, but does not show it. Thanks a lot for giving him the “token” Alpha traits. He also has no manners when it comes to his family. If he doesn’t tell his daughter to not “have the pieces fly everywhere”. This of course applies only to apple doughnut. If it is anything else, she can be scolded. One thing important – Even the Cathedral thinks the list is WEIRD (http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2015/10/01/_27_ways_to_be_a_modern_man_by_brian_lombardi_in_the_new_york_times_the.html). That is a code name for CREEP. So if it is not satire, it is the traits of the… Read more »
Update from the trenches:
My liberal blue pill friends are livid about this article. These are smart intellectually curious men. They can be reasoned with. I’m going to try and convert them. Wish me luck.
It’s really starting to piss me off actually. Some desperate kid is going to read this and buy some girl a pair of shoes and then get expelled for stalking. NYTimes definitely fucked this one up.
Reading into websites with AF/BB being discussed, getting to know stereotypes and consequently identifying them in real life … it makes me want to demonstrate to myself that I’m hotter and get my n-count up (not for the sex per se, but for validation).
How should I feel about this? I figure this mindset must be common on r/theredpill
I couldn’t resist and had to do some research on this piece. Actually had a very short conversation with the author Brian Lombardi via phone yesterday. Asked him if he was the author and he got very defensive very quickly… Demanded to know who I was and how I got his number. I told him my intention wasn’t to doxx him nor harass him, I only wanted to know if he was indeed the author and if it was a serious piece. He accused me of harassment, said I was interrupting his lunch and hung up on me. Interestingly, I… Read more »
@bnon: “I figure this mindset must be common on r/theredpill”
Something like it is common any time you change your mental model, after all, change requires that things become different and creating those differences takes time and process.
“How should I feel about this?”
I think you should feel good that you are self-aware enough to ask the question. That alone indicates that you might come through it all with your head screwed on relatively straight, however crooked it might be at times during the transition.
“Mine was a purebred ā she had papers. Never seen anything like it before or since, although that is partly because Iāve learned to smell them and bail when I get the whiff.” Yeah, mine is diagnosed too. “BPD does get a bit overused in the manosphere, but when the average womanās mindset and behavior gets closer to that of a real BPD with every generation can you really blame them?” No, I don’t blame them. I just hope these guys are not using “she’s BPD” as an excuse, and continue to search for and believe in that unicorn who… Read more »
IAS – Sorry, I don’t have a study. It’s a number that has been thrown around here. It’s presented as a contrast to women, where 80% or so of the women are passing their genes on. It is my reasoned belief that the women would like to mate with a fewer percentage of men, but the men implement societies where women mate with a higher percentage of men. Because as I said, if the percentage of mating men drops below a certain threshold, the deselected men will revolt violently. The “alpha” (mating) men would go along with this because they… Read more »
Intriguingly, the guy really has no online profile which is a bit strange in this day and age ā especially for someone whose piece appears in the NYT.
Yeah, I thought the same thing. A better question might be “Why the fuck did the editor publish this shit?” It sounds like the wet dream of some fat ass trailer trash girl.
The opposite of everything I am. I feel rather complimented that I’m not the epitome of the NY “modern man” actually. The only exception is protecting the wife and family. That is one of the only traditional roles he includes in his list of shame, I have no issue with being the one to defend the family. My wife is a wimp and my daughter is as well, it is only rational for me to be the one to defend them. When I go on business trips I hand one of my pistols to my son (18 years old, going… Read more »
Lazy post Rollo, sorry sick of the ass kissing. The typing here is boring so I thought I would share this story. I take my tablet out in the backyard like my old newspaper with my coffee each morning. A couple of weeks ago my cat gets up and looks over in the corner of the yard, I just think it is a squirrel and keep reading. Crash..some guy comes over my wood fence and ends up on his face. Now I think to myself, fuck I have confront this dick big time. I start to charge him, he is… Read more »
@Chrissypus HT to you for the research, which basically confirms my call on the NYT piece back on page 1: that it was a fisk-worthy muddled attempt at satire/humor in need of a joke infusion. Certainly an article worthy of comment, being in the blessed NYT and all, though perhaps a few pairs of panties ought to come untwisted now that we’ve looked more closely. That author guy has no journamalism back-history should not matter much. Every now and then the NYT allows a “civilian” to write op-eds. Probably his GF/SO was the connection to get his screed on-screen. Awhile… Read more »
@Fred
Too far off the mark. Basically they are smart enough to realize that the fact that they can’t tell if it’s satire or not says something about our current state of affairs.
Well, Tomassi’s bad manners and constant insults aside, he really did write a good piece in response to the NY Times article. Whether the original is satire or not, it has provoked several conversations about te intertoobz.
As to the ‘spherian stereotypes, all women have BPD, all men have aspergers, I wish we’d knock it off. That’s false and foolish and relentless psycho-babble detracts from the truth.
hi Rollo this is probably not the correct forum to mention this Should be under Feminine Imperative. I did a general search on the net “the cost to society with low male involvement” pretty much all that came up was the helping women with child raising etc. With MTGOW, low marriage rates, lack of starting businesses and working long hours by men…just interesting how dominated we are by the feminine imperative and that only a few red pill really get it about the major cause of the decline of society.
kfg: Thanks.
Not sure the n-count persuasion is in any way time the effort, that’s my main concern when asking.
Digging those sites or not, maybe a larger group of people will get another idea of what women want in the future anyhow
http://i.imgur.com/ytvSgC2.png
In my blue pill days, I used to think my wife was some form of BPD, sociopath, or what ever. That is because I had the equalist view and thought she aught to act and respond just like me. I even purchased a book called “splitting” that deals with the subject. (Good book by the way if you need some strategy) In any event, I found the red pill. Got separated for a while and ended up becoming acquainted with a true personality disordered woman. I was still in a blue pill fog and she told me point blank that… Read more »
Completely off topic LTR question. (BTW Rollo have you thought of creating a TRM forum?) So, I’ve been increasing my DHV antics with my wife, and she is STILL increasingly responding very positively. I sleep in an extra 30-60 minutes every morning while she gets up with the kids. I don’t help with any household chores whatsoever (other than guy stuff.) I choose what we do and when we do it. I’ve also been objectifying her even more than I normally do “in the bedroom. ” (normally never the bedroom lol) To more experienced guys… Is there limit? Is there… Read more »
“Iād wager that most of them give you subtle warnings like this. I think they take pride in it.” The truly non-empathic tend to have a certain cold self-awareness. They understand that they are different from other people, but have a non-empathic interpretation of that. They view their lack of empathy as a personal strength and, despite morals being rooted in empathy, a moral virtue. Contrariwise they view people with empathy as weak and lacking virtue. To the point of your subtle warnings, they justify their behaviours to themselves by their victims apparent weakness, i.e. if they allow themselves to… Read more »
Addendum: Given how we got on this topic, I think I should note that while Antisocial Personality Disorder (sociopathy/psychopathy) and Borderline Personality Disorder are both cluster B disorders, they aren’t the same thing.
Andy – IMO push until you have everything you want. If/when you meet resistance, decide if that particular boundary is worth pushing. If you go a little too far, its unlikely to cause any huge blowback. Put another way: you can always tone it back. But pushing sets the tone that you expect her to keep up with you. I “objectify” my wife constantly. No matter what we are doing, she is always a sexual being to me. Wife, friend, etc. – all the shit comes after fuck Buddy. And I make sure she never forgets that. In private or… Read more »
Tomassi, every time you change my screen name, you show you still care. How very sweet. Listen dude, I wish you no harm. You’ve got my name, email, blog, gravatar. As you well know, If I wished to troll you it would take me two seconds to change my identity and disguise my location. I do not. Do you know why? Compassion, empathy. You perceive yourself as being the object of ridicule, hatred, and are somewhat paranoid about it. I do not hate you, nor am I in any way threatened by the things you say. I’ve stated a dozen… Read more »
No IB, you perceive yourself as an honest, rational agent when in fact you are a proven fraud and a liar with no genuine interest in an open debate. I wont delete your posts because, unlike you, I strongly believe that the merits of an idea demand an open, objective debate to test their strengths. The ideas you express in your posts are so weak, and your religio-rationalizations are so transparent, you can’t afford to have any dissent expressed there lest your ego-investments be proven false in front of the half dozen regular churchians who populate your comment threads. That… Read more »
“The ideas you express in your posts are so weak, and your religio-rationalizations are so transparent, you canāt afford to have any dissent expressed there lest your ego-investments be proven false in front of the half dozen regular churchians who populate your comment threads.” Well, that is not only unfair, it is also untruthful. I often receive a great deal of opposition. “you are a liar and a fraud..” Not so much, Tomassi. That is actually you projecting your frustration towards those you perceive to be “christo-feminists.” I am curious what that is about? I may be a strong Christian,… Read more »
Well, that is not only unfair, it is also untruthful. I often receive a great deal of opposition. The allegation wasn’t if you received opposition, but that you delete/censor that opposition to maintain the false impression that you are in any way objective or interested in anything but an echo chamber for your ego-investments. Your attempt at misdirection here, once again, confirms that you are a fraud and a liar. You get here what you are unwilling to permit on your own blog that is why you keep coming back. That is actually you projecting your frustration towards those you… Read more »
“Understand, your nonexistent debate skills have thus far always begun at the bottom of this pyramid.” I think not, Tomassi. First of all, I have agreed with you numerous times, so where is the debate? Second of all, I did not call you a single name until you decided to mock my compassion for men who commit suicide,and than proceeded to call me menopausal,borderline, a fraud and liar. That is flat out uncalled for abuse, Tomassi. I have spoken to you as gently and respectfully as possible and you have not responded in kind. I do wish to discuss these… Read more »
Andy, “To more experienced guysā¦ Is there limit? Is there a snapping point? or should I just keep laying it on? Should I keep going until I find the snapping point and then back it off a bit? She seems happier every day.” No, it sounds like you are doing good. Just keep in mind that change takes time. You learn new stuff and apply it, you make positive progress and then you and her have to consolidate (or plateau) and pause and then move higher. This is just like any equity stock chart moving up, or any athlete in… Read more »
I āobjectifyā my wife constantly.
And I bet she loves it. It’s a compliment coming from a high value man.
@Andy “So, Iāve been increasing my DHV antics with my wife, and she is STILL increasingly responding very positively. I sleep in an extra 30-60 minutes every morning while she gets up with the kids. I donāt help with any household chores whatsoever (other than guy stuff.) I choose what we do and when we do it. Iāve also been objectifying her even more than I normally do āin the bedroom. ā (normally never the bedroom lol)” good job! props on putting in the workā¦it’s not easyā¦ “To more experienced guysā¦ Is there limit? Is there a snapping point? or… Read more »
” I am way outside of churchian culture . . . ”
That kinda goes with the territory of being outside culture.
OT
FI in play…video shows ‘threat’ to male copā¦reaction by news station? how it affects the cops’ wivesā¦
http://losangeles.cbslocal.com/2015/10/05/disturbing-viral-video-seemingly-shows-la-officer-being-stalked-rattles-law-enforcement/
āyou are a liar and a fraud..ā
And you are also a spammer, not a troller.
If you think we are not mostly indifferent to you, we are. When we reply to you it is more in the interests of having something to say so the other guys here can be entertained or enlightened by the words.
Fine Tomassi, if you cannot even act like a human being, I’ll be the better man and leave you in peace to orbit around on your own paranoid little planet.
“. . . Iāll . . . leave you in peace . . . ”
Q.E.D.
@Ted, SJF, hbd Thanks guys. I’m happy now, but I’m going to keep pushing it. Why not? It’s so much fun. Game is awesome. I’m completely addicted. I’ve realized that there is little voice in my head that knows exactly what to say and exactly what to do. It’s my initial intuition that I had been suppressing unless I was drunk or in a certain mood. Socially I’ve been starting more conversations with people, and most of the time people aren’t quite as boring as I had feared. I decided to give the law of state transference a try the… Read more »
“I think not, Tomassi.”
Q.E.D.^2
Gone yet?
The women donāt really know what they want and rationalize it; the men believe what they are being told the women want according to what is socially acceptable (Sandberg quote that Rollo repeats many times). Clearly it isnāt really working so well for many women either as they reach the wall, even those that manage to grab a Beta Bucks husband are apparently unhappy, and many of them donāt even manage that and are wondering where have all the nice men gone. It makes no difference though. Women were unhappy with the bygone system as well, because they are apparently… Read more »
In this year I’ve been lurking here now I can’t remember a single incident when one of the females was advancing the discussion, contributing something of value. I made the case for gaming them once but I think I was mistaken. The issue seems to be how they come up with some shit when there is some “creative silence” with the men. Women can’t stand leisure and contemplation, they don’t understand or even fear it. But notice girls: it is important for men. That’s how to produce those great thoughts. We need that time of silence and God gave you… Read more »
@lh
My theory is that they’re our groupies. They stop by to bask in our unapologetic masculinity.
@Edelweiss Women take pictures of their feces and share them? Wtf, man? For what purpose? This oversharing society is simply ridiculous.
Absolutely true Andy. But they don’t qualify for basking in our masculinity. I don’t really expect females to produce great adventurous thoughts, but those I talk to for longer in real life at least try to give the impression they could think and argue. And they learn what is too stupid to go well with me and avoid it. And be sweet and feminine to cover it. These bitches here are just annoying. And I think I know what insanity’s central point of critique of Rollo is and I think she is partly right… if only she would be bright… Read more »
@lh
Haha, I haven’t been here very long, but my guess is that IB gets all the positive reinforcement she can handle from her husband. She comes here to get shit on, and feel more feminine. Satisfy her hypergamy, etc.
@Blaximus: “ā¦ This is too easy.”
I know right?! She has to be getting off this nonsense…
“I donāt really care to doxx the guy”
why not, he (or she) is not writing annonymously
if I wrote a letter to the NY Times on the redpill and they published it, think the FI is just going to stand by?
@fraud
Enjoy your daze
Dear god. It never stops. Check this: http://www.thecollegefix.com/post/24488/
-Being healthy and in shape is a mental disorder.
-Chopping off your genitals and taking hormones to pretend to be the opposite sex is natural, good, and courageous.
The West has fallen so far.
“… Women take pictures of their feces and share them? Wtf, man? For what purpose? This oversharing society is simply ridiculous.” The confluence of electronic devices and social media outlets is driving multiple generations insane. Rarely have I ever seen a trend have such tenacity and staying power as this current ” sharing while isolated ” societal fascination. How many pictures and selfies can anyone take before it just devolves into silly shit? I have come to the realization that there is absolutely nothing that can be done to stop it. When I’m around my kids or god kids, I… Read more »
Oh, as an aside, my butcher looks and sounds exactly like Jack Palance.
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g426J4Uh2m4?feature=player_detailpage&w=640&h=360%5D
blaximus
Rarely have I ever seen a trend have such tenacity and staying power as this current ā sharing while isolated ā societal fascination. How many pictures and selfies can anyone take before it just devolves into silly shit?
Who knows? You’d think we’d hit bottom, then this:
http://www.sfgate.com/national/article/D-backs-announcers-mock-girls-more-focused-on-6543747.php
Mass selfies at the ball game. Well, ASU is a party school.
@Anonymous Reader It’s sad when people do that selfie bs. You miss out of living life. I read somewhere that countries are now putting out directions on how to do it and not get injured or killed. Apparently now people are harming themselves and others. A man lost an arm from a rattlesnake selfie, a woman took a pic of a bear and it caved her skull in, and a woman go hit by a car stepping backwards into traffic. I didn’t know shit has gotten that bad until I read that article. Death by selfie is now a death… Read more »
Anonymous Reader
Yeah, I saw this earlier. It’s ridiculous imo, but the D-backs couldn’t possibly let this go without somehow rewarding it….
” Unlike the broadcasters, the Diamondbacks appreciated the display of selfie prowess and got the girls to share a group selfie on the team Instagram account.”
Selfie Prowess. That’s a quality that will take a person to great heights in life.
Andy – Enjoy! š “My theory is that theyāre our groupies. They stop by to bask in our unapologetic masculinity.” I’ve often wondered why women that claim to be so fearful of male anger often appear on blogs with angry men, and stir the pot. I imagine its very exciting to see all that anger from the safety of a monitor. In fact, I concluded that for some women, hanging around here could be a form of porn. Now I’m not saying the ladies here are all getting off, but I do wonder why some of the more vocally opposed… Read more »
@Ted
Seeing storms behind the clouds: Biases in the attribution of anger. Evolution & Human Behavior
http://www.sscnet.ucla.edu/comm/haselton/unify_uploads/files/Galperin%20et%20al%202013%20(trait%20anger%20attribution%20bias).pdf
Women expect men to be angry, thus they practice an adaptive form of error management based on that expectation.
“I read somewhere that countries are now putting out directions on how to do it and not get injured or killed.”
They shouldn’t do this. If people are so stupid and narcissistic that they get themselves killed taking a selfie, I say let them go for it.
I am quite certain there are more important things tax dollars could be spent on…like passing yes means yes laws or something.
You know, something meaningful and beneficial for everyone.
That’s hilarious.
What’s the most impressive thing you’ve done?
Here’s an answer a woman gave on Kimmel:
http://ca.complex.com/sports/2015/10/woman-admits-cheating-on-ex-boyfriend-with-famous-athlete-jimmy-kimmel-live
Female supremacy and dominance run amok: One of my guilty pleasure TV shows (I download it – don’t have cable or sat or even a real TV) is Castle. I guess I like the star from his Firefly days and am a sucker for police procedurals/mysteries. It’s like eating a bit of candy or something, mindless, pretty entertainment that is kind of stupid but relaxing. The new season started a few weeks back and I just downloaded episode 1 of the new season and was treated to a level of female supremacist preening and unreality at a level I don’t… Read more »
In regards to the NYT article, I don’t care whether it is spoof or not. Either way it illuminates the twisted thinking we all bemoan. If it IS satire, it is awesome. I think that really great satire should make it hard to differentiate from the real thing. If you are sitting there, debating whether someone is serious or not, then the author has achieved something noteworthy. More than once I have read something, and my mind goes back and forth. “Well, this is insane bullshit…this can’t be real. But then again, I have seen for real insane bullshit people… Read more »
@Andy I would say it is hard to distinguish if it is satire or not. Aye, that’s the gist of Poe’s Law: “Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is utterly impossible to parody a Creationist in such a way that someone won’t mistake for the genuine article.” It’s basically just been expanded as a generic term to include all extremist views where it becomes impossible to distinguish between someone that holds those views and someone that parodies them. This article falls right in that place, hence the reason I’m getting a laugh out of it… Read more »
@scribblerg
I remember a long time ago, doing a ride-along with my brother who was a streetcop in those days in Dallas TX.
I’ve heard a lot of times from cop friends that I need to do this, particularly in South Dallas on a weekend. “Better than any amusement park you’ll ever go to” was how one of them explained it. Watching cops deal people at their worst does sound like all kinds of fun.
Let’s throw two ideas together and see what happens. @Fred Flange, handle chameleon – “Iām not sure but something may be happening here. The example that jumps at me is the male obsession with culinary skills. Having the best recipes, the best eateries, is now an Alpha qualifier. Years ago no man who didnāt want to get beat up and hung on a fence would admit to wanting to do that. Maybe all of the results of forced feminization will torn out to have been a feint, Resulting in some new form of Alpha swagger we have yet to recognize.”… Read more »
@Rollo / All Since we’re discussing some sociological things that affect men’s development in the last few posts, here’s something I’ve been thinking about lately. From what I understand, homophobia was hardly a universal aspect of human societies. The Greeks in particular are well-known to not have had any particular stigma against it. Sure, men tried to differentiate themselves from men who exclusively desired other men, but past that it didn’t seem to much concern them. I wonder if homophobia was actually an instrument of the FI – basically a way of shaming men for having close friendships and bonds,… Read more »
Death by selfie is now a death statistic like dying from shark attacks or bee stings.
Think of it as evolution in action…
Agreed. It’s like natural selection is weeding out the weak who’s lives are ran by validation.
Sun Wukong
Iāve heard a lot of times from cop friends that I need to do this, particularly in South Dallas on a weekend. āBetter than any amusement park youāll ever go toā was how one of them explained it.
Another way to put it: you know how stupid some people are on the show “COPS”? Well, that show is edited. It’s not reality.
Some people in Reality are even more stupider.
Yeah, you should totally do this. If nothing else, observing human nature “in the wild” is most interesting.
@kfg
“Apropos of your observation, the average lifespan of a king was about three years.”
https://youtu.be/_ql4Xe6MxQ4
Well, maybe not your cuppa. But as a folkie I thought ya might like seeing what the kids are doing with the folk tradition these days š
Blaximus:
Selfie Prowess.
Probably going to be a degree program at some colleges in a few years. Would fit in well with “communications studies”, y’know?
Gotta admit, if I was back on the market, I’d totally trawl the web for selfies of any woman I was more than passingly interested in. Better not find too many, or any bathroom titty shots. I mean, look at those chicks at the D-back game, anyone want to do more than spin those plates? How many titty selfies has each one of them made just in the last year, I wonder?
Forge, ” Where things can fall apart is when you find the guys who trumpet only using seasonal locally-sourced shade-grown organic vegan low-carb gluten-free kosher halal ethical superfood. Thatās a status game, and itās for chicks. I prefer buying from the farmerās market myself (farmer friends/itās more interesting), some studies show better nutrient density in organically-grown vegetables (stands to reason, micronutrients are formed as plant defense mechanisms) so I give them a bit of a preference, and local can be cool if it means fresher. But itās all practical stuff, I donāt avoid things that donāt match a checklist, and… Read more »
@Blaximus “I do this because whenever I eat at a decent restaurant, I feel I can duplicate the tasty meal at home. So far, so good. I just need a pizza oven now and Iāll never need to purchase anything from outside sources again.” Pizza Napoletano needs a lot of consistent heat, and preferably a touch of smoke, to cook right. I find a grill set to 550 deg F or so with a pizza stone on the grate does just peachy. American styles of pizza are less bare-bones and so need a bit lower temperature and more time. Pizza… Read more »
@Blaximus
So ultimately it comes down to whether or not you have an identity that originates from your own self-conception and experiences, that isn’t swayed by other’s perceptions or expectations.
@Forge
Precisely.
@Scribblerg “Lately I feel like the insanity is just accelerating and escalating to a level so ridiculous that itās intolerable. Iām left wondering what to do? Should I just retreat farther from he popular culture and live in my own bubble? It seems that ceding ground is not the answer. But I donāt want to exhaust myself fighting this crap all the time. I feel embattled at times and wonder where all this is going. I just read that the Obama admin issued a 31 page manual to the Border Guard on how to determine the gender identity of people… Read more »
@Forge the Sky: I actually like quite a bit of folk fusion, but yeah, metal has never been my cuppa. Steeleye Span it ain’t. Still, I can take interest in things that I don’t care for and that was interesting, so thanks for posting it.
Forge,
I’ve done a few pizzas on the grille using dough prepared and sold by a local bakery. They were good, but there was something missing. You’re correct about the hint of smoke.
Eventually I’ll make some dough myself and throw one in the smoker, adding smoke for the last 30 seconds to a minute. Set the vents right and my homebuilt smoker will get to 700 degrees easily, so it may be the way to go.
I was contemplating making a smallish brick oven in the back yard, using wood fire as cooking source.
@ScribblerG “Iām left wondering what to do? Should I just retreat farther from he popular culture and live in my own bubble? It seems that ceding ground is not the answer. But I donāt want to exhaust myself fighting this crap all the time.” Have you looked into cultivating Schadenfreude? I was a little skeptical about it’s value when I came across it in a book chapter from Aaron Clarey’s “Enjoy the Decline: Accepting and Living with the Death of the United States Paperback”. But it actually a decent coping mechanism. I mean people will always find a way to… Read more »
@Blaximus
If you can beg, borrow or steal one of those automatic bread machines (that people use a couple times and then store away), some of them have a pizza dough cycle. Put in some bread flour, yeast and water and it will spit out some decent dough with out you having to knead and rest the dough.
That way you can type out some more of your excellent commentary here while you wait for the dough to be finished.
@SJF
Hahahaaa Thank you sir.
I have one of those bread makers somewhere in my basement. It’s probably new in the box.
I worked in a pizza parlor for a while when I was 15. Unfortunately for me I wasn’t curious enough at the time to pay attention and learn.
I might just do what you suggested because it will be faster. I will use white flour and semolina mixed in. That way I can make a pie and some Italian bread nice and fresh.
You can make some pretty awesome home meals at $3/plate. No reason not to dig cooking. There used to be a prolific commenter on J4G named Escoffier who knew his way around the kitchen.
Someone’s gotta keep the culinary knowledge. Women folk are letting it atrophy.
7/8ths to one cup water, 2 tablespoons olive oil, 1 teaspoon salt, 1 tablespoon sugar, 3 cups all purpose flour, 2 teaspoons active dry yeast.
Put ingredients in machine, select dough setting, press Start. When done with cycle form dough into mound and allow to rest for 10 minutes. Can be uses for two 12 inch pizzas.
Dough can be kept for several days in the refrigerator in an oiled plastic bag.
@scribblerg ” 2 Do not be conformed to this world,[c] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect” Romans 12. Not to bring the Will of God into it, but the essence of the words. Media is a false representation. Don’t be confounded by popular culture/media nonsense. Wisdom is to increase your immunity to bullshit. Observe, make a judgment call, and mentally move on. It is, what it is. You’re responsible for your own life and sanity. ” Mind your… Read more »
SJF, Blaximus I find blasting Italian opera from the speakers as I do the dough punch-down helps the quality. And quantity, it drives off the riffraff. Seriously though, making your own dough can help a lot. Bakeries will always use the cheapest ingredients they can, and quality of ingredients seems to matter a lot with good pizza. But heck, I’m a traditionalist when it comes to pizza; I always did a 3-day fermentation process of the dough with ale yeast, involving a warm ferment, a cold ferment, and 3 punch-downs. Amalytic enzymes saccarify the starches to aid in maillard compound… Read more »
@kfg
Not much of a metal guy myself usually but when you’ve got a bunch of hairy dudes just shredding a 4-album long retelling of the Kalevala I’m all in.
HeHaaahaa Forge I was following along. This is why I’m seriously considering using only my own ingredients. Commercial breads have bromide in place of traditional iodine. Bromide wreaks havoc on the thyroid and hormonal balance. May as well put pool chlorine in food. Luckily there are a bunch of quality specialty markets close by me. Good stuff to be had there. I was on a Chinese food kick this year and I have shelves of ingredients for take-out style Chinese. My General Tso chicken will hang with the best (?) take out or food court Chinese foodery. So next up… Read more »
@Forge – Male friendships used to be much more emotional and affectionate. Witness various Euro men who kissed each other on the cheek or read the correspondence of 17th-19th century men in the U.S. – so I don’t think it as homosexual friendly. I do think that multi-culturalism has helped atomize society as it always does. Homogenous cultures have much higher levels of “trust” (a specific academic concept, fyi) and people in higher trust societies report being much happier, more social and with higher levels of civic/community involvement of all sorts. Just a though, certainly it’s a thought-provoking item for… Read more »
So, tell me, The 300. Homoerotic film or just good masculine film? It was readily labeled as homoerotic, even though King Leonidas made fun of the Athenians for being boy lovers.
@Scribblerg
I don’t see it as being homosexual friendly either. I’m suggesting homophobia might have been used as a tool to stigmatize previously common non-sexual affection between men. I’m not saying that such affection was a pro-gay sort of thing.
But you raise a very good point about homogenous/small-town type cultures tending to foster more closeness in general.
@Forge cooking is masculine because you’re masculine and you’re doing it, not the other way around. @scribblerg “Iām left wondering what to do? Should I just retreat farther from he popular culture and live in my own bubble?” I feel the same need to isolate myself because, for me, it’s such a challenge to develop any sense of likemindedness with the average guy. But that is the burden of TRP – being in a different intellectual zip code than the masses. “I feel like Iāve landed on another planet more and more the time. How are we going to ever… Read more »
@Is This Thing On?
I saw 300 as being a very masculine film. I can see it being erotic for gay men as well, but it’s more a side-effect of there just being lots of masculinity on display. The trumpeting of how homoerotic is was is mostly masculine shaming, combined with a bit of subconcious ‘I’m not gay so that movie’s weird’ signaling by sexually insecure men.
Forgethesky, “I wonder if homophobia was actually an instrument of the FI ā basically a way of shaming men for having close friendships and bonds, so that they could not get their emotional needs fulfilled by other men without risking ridicule and seeming āless of a man.ā “. Because they wanted men to be emotionally dependent on women , it gives women more power to manipulate a man. More than 60 years ago, men, knew not to be emotionally dependent on women, because, men knew, it represents weakness and no tingles . It is another way of feminizing men. Almost… Read more »