The following is an excerpt from the Red Pill Reddit forum I’ve been following recently. I had an emailer ask me to opine about this situation and, for as much as I’d like to brag about having a previous essay for any occasion, I realized I hadn’t really covered this situation. Well, not in any great depth anyway,…
Bit of background: my girlfriend and I are both working people with solid jobs. Mine involves working partly in a lab a fair distance away from where we live, and I am gone for about 2 weeks a month. We have been together 5 years, and things have always been awesome between us. No major fights to speak of.
The incident happened last Saturday night. I was due to return the following Monday, and my girlfriend and a few of her friends had planned a night out, painting the town red. I knew about it, and this isn’t an uncommon occurrence and I paid no mind to it.
Saturday was a typically busy day for me, and I was really tired and went to sleep early that night, as I had to get up early to get back to work. Get back to work Sunday, not checking my phone as I was running late, and noticed lots of messages and voicemails waiting for me when I got to the lab. All from my GF: in all the voicemails, she was in tears, and told me that she’d been out dancing in a club and that she’d been fairly tipsy, but not really drunk.
Apparently some guy started dancing around her, (this part is absolutely unclear, I only know what she told me) and after some words exchanged, yada yada, he leaned in to kiss her, and she kissed him back. I don’t know how long, or any details, but she said she realized what she’d done and returned home as soon as possible, where she started calling and texting me.
I’ve been back for 2 days now, and I’ve only had 1 discussion with her. She was pretty much at my feet when I got back, asking for forgiveness, and honestly, I was nowhere near thinking of breaking up with her. We didn’t talk much that night, just laid in bed, me holding her, thinking we could work this out. No. She has been an absolute wreck since she woke up 3 days ago, won’t look me in the eye, left home crazy early, returns extremely late, and hasn’t been returning texts or calls.
She is broken inside, and I don’t think she can forgive herself for what she did. I don’t know what to do, I can’t reach her – I guess I have to give her time, but honestly, I’m barely holding on looking at her in her state. I bear no ill will towards her, I just think she made a mistake in the heat of the moment. I’m completely lost. I don’t know how I can convince her that I can move past this, and that I still love her. Even I have been near tears at times these past few days. I need a place to vent, I don’t have many people I can talk to, and I need to write down my thoughts.
TL;DR: GF made out with someone in a bar while I was out of town and is an absolute wreck right now, even though I think I can move past it and work at getting everything back on track. I’m lost and don’t know how to convince her. I don’t know what she is thinking and I’m barely holding on.
Now, a bit later he gives this thread a status update.
UPDATE: I left her a note yesterday night in the kitchen, saying some things, we can work past this, etc. etc. She left a note at the same place I had. There were wet patches on that paper, and she pretty much wrote she fucked up big time and she was sorry. (She had already said these things last time I saw her.) Also said sorry she had shut me out, she didn’t know what to do, and that she didn’t think she deserved me after the way I treated her the night I got back. She has left for work now – (true, I called up someone I know there) – and she said she is done being an asshole, and would come home to and (I quote:) ” get out of my life once and for all. You don’t deserve the way I’ve treated you this week.”
The TRP subredd commenters have pretty much covered the majority of what I would point out. We’re dealing with an abject Beta here who, like most Blue Pill conditioned men buys into the touchy-feely ‘open communications will solve everything’ fallacy. He also feels it’s incumbent upon him to follow the ‘be the bigger man’ meme and forgive her indiscretions (at least the ones she felt guilty enough to relate to him in a text). And really, what’s to forgive anyway? It was only a kiss, right?
For a bit of context, they’re both 26, and are living together. We don’t really know much about how long they’ve been together, but if they’re roommates (always a bad idea) I’m going to guess it’s been at least a couple of years.
What this guy is experiencing is actually a very common rationalization strategy women will use when they are saddled with a man their subconscious recognizes as Beta. In The Medium is the Message I point out that there’s really no such thing as ‘mixed messages’ and that women’s behaviors will generally inform a guy as to what a woman’s real intent is. This is a basic behavioral psychology principle; behavior is the only true measure of motivation and intent. Thus, all the verbalizing of intent, verbal rationalization of purpose and ‘open communication’ simply becomes a part of the behavior which Red Pill behaviorists then parse as true intent.
Yes, this can get tedious in the beginning, and yes, it seems like a huge waste of time trying to second guess a woman’s intent, but understanding what a woman’s ‘medium’ is informing you about is a necessary step to internalizing Red Pill awareness. Once you’ve had experience in this parsing a woman’s behaviors with the behavior that is her rationalizations, it’s from this point that a Red Pill aware man can begin to predict behaviors and become more effective ‘readers’ of what a woman’s actions is somewhat reliably telling them.
In this guy’s case his girlfriend’s messaging is pretty clear to any marginally Red Pill aware man. Her behavior is born from a desire to escape the domesticity of their live-in arrangement and while she’s ‘out with the girls’ she seizes an opportunity to engage in an extra-pairing affair. Naturally, what we ‘know’ from what’s related is that she got tipsy and just kissed a guy. As you might expect, the commenters on the TRP sub jump to what predictably happened and the speculation is a lot more than just kissing.
Evo-Bio 101
However, all speculation aside, we have to make a few basic connections here. My first expectation is that she was likely in the proliferative (pre-ovulatory) phase of her menstrual cycle. I can’t be certain, but I’m sure if the guy were to be objective, he’d see the signs. Second, her behavior belies intent, and thus she seeks an extra-pair encounter and puts herself into an environment that will likely facilitate it. The kissing (assuming that’s all it was) is still a behavior that indicates she’s open to a short term breeding opportunity (Alpha Fucks) and is looking, even if just temporarily, to escape her domestic situation with her Beta live-in boyfriend.
That’s basic evo-psych/evo-bio Red Pill awareness of women’s nature. What gets interesting is when she feels compelled to relate her “infidelity” to her Beta boyfriend. The first presumption we make is that she’s felt some pangs of guilt for having betrayed his trust, but as we’ll see this is in error. We make this presumption because, like this guy does, we want to give a woman the benefit of the doubt when it comes to guilt because men and women popularly believe that women have a supernatural gift for empathy. It simply ‘sounds right’ to believe that a woman had an error in judgement whilst a little tipsy, but again we need to see this situation objectively from an evo-psych/behaviorist perspective.
When I break down this Beta guy’s rationalization process you’ll begin to see how this presumption of empathy and his Blue Pill conditioned mindset actually works against this girl, but for now we have to get a grasp of her feminine subconscious and how it reflexively interacts with the sexual imperative of Hypergamy. Most women’s confessions of extra-pair infidelity isn’t rooted in guilt. That’s not to say women don’t feel guilt or regret, it’s just to say that the functional purpose of the confession doesn’t subconsciously originate in feelings of guilt.
When women ‘cheat’, even when it’s non-sexually, their subconscious is testing the man it suspects is Beta which she’s paired with for confirmation of him being Beta. This is potentially risky, of course, but such is the prime directive of Hypergamy that if it is subconsciously suspected that a paired-with man is less that Hypergamously optimal the long term benefits of confirmation outweigh any risks. Thus, a confession of infidelity from a woman should universally be interpreted as a Hypergamous shit test from men.
If nothing else, her confession of infidelity should be interpreted as a lack of genuine desire for a man – such a lack that it’s necessitated her behavior of engaging in genuine desire with another man. What rationalizations and verbal communications that follow from this point should be consider part of that woman’s behavioral set, and in terms of the Medium being the message, should be assessed as her medium.
So what do we see in this case?
I’ve been back for 2 days now, and I’ve only had 1 discussion with her. She was pretty much at my feet when I got back, asking for forgiveness, and honestly, I was nowhere near thinking of breaking up with her. We didn’t talk much that night, just laid in bed, me holding her, thinking we could work this out. No. She has been an absolute wreck since she woke up 3 days ago, won’t look me in the eye, left home crazy early, returns extremely late, and hasn’t been returning texts or calls.
he is broken inside, and I don’t think she can forgive herself for what she did. I don’t know what to do, I can’t reach her…
On the surface we have the reports of this guy stating that she’s wracked with remorse and asking forgiveness. Sounds reasonable enough, right? No talking, cuddling, comfort and consolation, but wont look him in the eye, leaves early, comes back late. The guy presumes she’s broken inside and can’t forgive herself, but her behaviors imply that she’s disappointed in his reaction to just the marginal amount of information she’d related about her “infidelity”.
In his update we get this part, emphasis mine:
There were wet patches on that paper, and she pretty much wrote she fucked up big time and she was sorry. (She had already said these things last time I saw her.) Also said sorry she had shut me out, she didn’t know what to do, and that she didn’t think she deserved me after the way I treated her the night I got back. She has left for work now – (true, I called up someone I know there) – and she said she is done being an asshole, and would come home to and (I quote:) ” get out of my life once and for all. You don’t deserve the way I’ve treated you this week.”
In the post Gut Check I mention how men’s subconscious awareness subtly informs their conscious awareness by picking up on shifts in behavior, attitude and environment. Through our socialization, acculturation and Blue Pill conditioning, men are taught to suppress this natural, instinctual messaging that our gut is telling us. We do so because we fear being accused of male insecurity, jealousy and not subscribing wholesale to the equalist idea that men and women are co-equal rational agents who’ve evolved past anything like our baser natures.
Yet here, with the benefit of Red Pill awareness, we can see a perfect example of a guy suppressing what his peripheral awareness is basically screaming at him. This woman has essentially verified his Beta status by his default willingness to forgive her Alpha Fucks indiscretions with few (if any) questions asked. That test failed, she now hopes he will actually get angry enough to break up with her. Again, test failed, as all of his efforts are directed towards his unconditional love and forgiveness.
Please, Break Up with Me!
This woman is vocally telling him “please, break up with me”, but even this is ignored and rationalized away in his Blue Pill conditioned mindset that tells him all they need is open communication to solve her Hypergamous equation. She literally tells him, “you don’t deserve the way I’ve treated you.” This is part of her medium, this is her subconscious attempting to tell his subconscious how and why she’s done what she has, but his Blue Pill conditioning has suppressed any hope of that message being translated to him. Bear in mind here, this isn’t necessarily a case of a woman being intentionally malicious. Often this process is one in which she is only playing out as a semi-aware actor of her Hypergamous subroutine.
I’ve had guys relate many similar story in the same vein as this one. In all of them there is a subconscious hope that a paired man which a woman’s Hypergamous instinct has designated as Beta will just get it and understand that she wants him to break up with her. This may be overt, but more often it’s subtle. She’ll leave clues, breadcrumbs, for him to follow that indicate her infidelity in the hopes that he’ll become angry and break up with her. Maybe its an open diary, or an open social media account, or maybe just small convenient absences that are out of the ordinary, but the trail is one her subconscious hopes her man will discover and react to.
There are many reasons for this. The principle one being she desires an easily acknowledged reason for her exit from that pairing. Even if she’s been unfaithful women maintain large social support networks that forgive them of their sins – and this primarily because her girlfriends are living out the same Hypergamous subroutines themselves. It becomes rationalized away, chalked up to her “journey of self-discovery”, not something she was proud of, but a necessary part of her life in becoming “who she really is.”
When this instinctual suppression is combined with Blue Pill deferral to women and their false assumption that communication is the key to solving all intersexual problems, then you get into this situation. One where that woman desperately wants a guy to get so pissed off that her drops the hammer and leaves her, like she’d expect any Alpha lover to do. However, his Beta disposition makes this hope for anger an impossibility and the very Blue Pill conditioning that made him so acceptable as a provider and a comfort makes her exiting the relationship impossible without her feeling some actual guilt for having to take the initiative to leave him.
And this is where real feminine guilt becomes unavoidable. She’s the one who has to kill the puppy because his Blue Pill conditioning wont allow for him to become angry enough to do it himself. This is where her real guilt and real resentment of him come into play for her. He’s too accommodating and to ready to rationalize away his forgiveness for her to avoid the bad feelings she’s hoped to engender in him.
“Why have a kid you have no intention of being invested in, beyond most of your wages?”
The Masculine Imperative: leave copies of your genes scattered around.
hmm ““Why have a kid you have no intention of being invested in, beyond most of your wages?” The Masculine Imperative: leave copies of your genes scattered around.” Why leave a mere copy when you can leave YOU to the power of YOU [a version of you, with all of your learning and experience and training imparted for years and years – “you” with a huge head start on life]? Especially when you are paying the coin for it. It’s idiotic. Alpha is amoral but there are still consequences… You abandon your child, especially if it is a son to… Read more »
Softek
I have a friend in his early 20’s who is trying to get into a monogamous relationship with an 18 year old freshman party girl whose favorite hobbies, by her own admission, are hooking up with guys, doing drugs, drinking and shoplifting.
Since Tam isn’t around I’ll have to pretend.
Oy, that there be unicorn material, that’s what that be.
LOL
That’s not GF material, that’s a walking petri dish of trouble.
Blaximus
This past weekend I had a house stuffed with 20something females, and I just didn’t see the masculine immunity at play.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selection_bias
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-selection_bias
Give us a break. Just because you wouldn’t put up with some rachet in your house doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty in the surrounding area that you don’t see.
In the OP situation, my response would probably have been to order her to stop drinking for a couple months as punishment (and demonstration of loyalty). Would that have been a smart move?
@Gunner: Smart move? No….
@ AR
Lol.
I see everything.😀
Gunner Q
In the OP situation, my response would probably have been to order her to stop drinking for a couple months as punishment (and demonstration of loyalty). Would that have been a smart move?
That would be a logical move…
@Rollo:
Off-topic but generally appropriate for Rational Male as seen in posts like https://therationalmale.com/2016/09/13/stalling-for-time/
Apparently 3 days ago the WHO classified being single as a disability, the same as infertile people. I only saw it now.
Seems like FI at play. Now single, fertile women can get medical help just as much as infertile women…
Any thoughts, Rollo?
Not exactly single, IAS – more like what we would describe as incel.
LTR FR’s? Shit…I got’s hundreds. What I left out from the shit-test post above: The missus is blowing me last night and we have to cease and desist as the kids come back in after playing four-square in the driveway. The younger kids are sent off to bed. That takes about 30″. Sexual tension is high… The lady and me play some billiards, talking, drinking, making out occasionally, she’ll drop and blow me occasionally. She’ll dip my dick in her glass the fellate on. At one point she pauses, stares up at me and says, “No, I can’t tell you.… Read more »
I’m curious to get everyone’s input on my situation. I’ve been seeing/dating this girl for about 8 months or so. She is in her early twenties and I would see her almost every weekend ( she would ask to hangout) and the sex and physical chemistry is great with her, she also has low notch count (less than 10 partners) and still lives at home (didn’t go to a big college) Anyways, fast forward to June of this year, She tells me “She needed to sort herself out because she was sad” my response was ok. She comes back two… Read more »
IMHO Plate spinning isn’t just about fucking, it’s about having control of your life. She is controlling your desire and ability to move on. Any and all plates must be droppable because you choose to drop them.
It sounds like you want someone more serious, Mike, and she’s obviously not the one. She’s just a temporary amusement, at most. If her magic pussy keeps you from pursuing your mission … drop her. Otherwise, get more plates and keep her only as long as the sky is blue and cloudless.
“She comes back two weeks later and I find out that she banged another dude during the time she needed space.” Well, yeah. What do you think she needed the “space” for? What were you using the space gave you for? Were you spinning other plates, or waiting on her? “Would you fellas continue plating her or would you drop?” So long as you can maintain your own awareness that she’s just a broken plate you’re spinning for your own amusement, your call. If you keep spinning her, it’s an opportunity to practice treating a woman like real trash and… Read more »
Simple breakdown, really…
She went out, met an Alpha Guy, saw an opportunity and took it. He’s a better deal. And I’m reasonably sure the deal was sealed back at his place.
The fact that the current boyfriend didn’t break up with her on the spot confirmed her test. She then wants the breakup up to happen to speed the process along. Her friend circle will then support her through her Eat-Pray Love epiphany.
So predictable.
TImely article, ties in with the neuroplasticity of the brain very well. The more you lie, the bigger the next lie is likely to be. https://www.theguardian.com/science/2016/oct/24/from-porkies-to-whoppers-over-time-lies-may-desensitise-brain-to-dishonesty Professor Marcus Raichle, a neurologist of the Washington School of Medicine in St Louis who was not involved in the work, said that lying was probably a learnt behaviour. “It’s a nice study… It seems reasonable that if you develop a pattern of behaviour and it’s reinforced that you would return to that habit,” he said. “An interesting question is whether there would be interventions to un-train somebody. If you’re a chronic liar that’s… Read more »
Whorefinder at the Chateau had this comment one day:
“Son… Pick any one of these, master it and you will get laid more than you have any right to… a guitar, a piano or a camera”
Steve Lyon – Alpha Triad representative and photographer concurs…
http://stevenlyon.com/html/nudes.html
“How was work today honey?”
@kfg Feel free to point me to the evidence that human beings are hardwired to be lifelong monogamous — men or women. @sentient 4 years @all guys, to make the promise to be monogamous at all is BETA to some extent, even LTR’ing AT ALL is BETA I can go out there tonight, the materials you got, make myself $15,000! Tonight! In two hours! Can you? Can you? Go and do likewise! if they’re going to love you they’re going to love you, regardless of whether you commit to them or spend a lot of time with them or whatever…it… Read more »
@sentient
I’m a really good guitar player and have a really awesome profession….neither external does as much for you as simply having a good body lol.
As a matter of fact, being TOO high value in the intellectual/artistic sense can intimidate people.
@Scray: “Feel free to point me to the evidence that human beings are hardwired to be lifelong monogamous — men or women.”
Earth to Scray. Earth to Scray. Come back down, Son.
“to some extent, even LTR’ing AT ALL is BETA”
No shit.
Well…. There are a few options…. 1. Get your valuables and lock them away in a safe place. Tell several friends she is acting extremely psychotic and you think she is capable of severely hurting herself or someone else. Make sure this message gets around. Tell your family. Tell her family. Make sure they believe you. Say whatever you need to to convince as many as possible. Bring someone else home (this could even be an escort) and fuck their brains out while she is in the apartment. Tell her to get out of the bedroom because you have better… Read more »
Women are all nothing more than a piece of ass. This one didn’t treat your dick right, so you are finding some that will.
Scray
“As a matter of fact, being TOO high value in the intellectual/artistic sense can intimidate people.”
Authentic high value in anything can intimidate…
@IAS “I’m convinced a lot of married women are basically “Please, divorce me”. And even then, most divorces are started by women…” I agree. I think a great many late-marrying wives are precisely in this state already. They are married to a conciliatory, “nice guy”, provider husband, for whom she has lost all respect and sexual attraction – assuming she had any for him to begin with. On the one hand she doesn’t want to lose his provisioning, support and security. Nor does she want to destabilize the children’s lives with a divorce. On the other hand she cannot abide… Read more »
More… Option 4. Plan a party with all your hornyist male friends at your place on a night you and her plan to stay in without her knowledge. After everyone relaxes, start suggesting an orgy. Start jokingly at first, then become more serious. Ask her openly and honestly in front of everyone if she ever fantasizes about fucking multiple men at once. Don’t pressure her or intimidate in any way but encourage it. If it happpens make sure you enjoy it and dump her immediately. It it doesn’t happen, tell her she is a prude. It is ok to painstakingly… Read more »
Rollo
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3710666/
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19668354
http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v522/n7556/abs/nature14514.html
http://web.mit.edu/bnl/pdf/Scoville_Milner_1957.pdf
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4686018/
http://bit.ly/2fdbqAm
http://www.pnas.org/content/112/35/11078.full
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S9QvhAwk7Zc
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2936113/
http://whoville.ucsd.edu/PDFs/361_Bayley_Squire_JNeurosci2002.pdf
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4449301/
http://grantome.com/grant/NIH/R01-MH058846-16
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3052701/
http://www.loc.gov/loc/brain/emotion/Bacheval.html
https://www.princeton.edu/~cggross/R_Soc_Lond_92.pdf
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK207155/
A hell of a good one.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4686018/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPhasHMSyas
http://www.nature.com/npp/journal/v35/n3/full/npp2009185a.html
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEBR5wM54I0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PEXWuGp_cw
She tells me “She needed to sort herself out because she was sad” my response was ok. She comes back two weeks later and I find out that she banged another dude during the time she needed space. Despite this knowledge I continued to see her and bang her to this day but deep in my mind I knww I can never make her a girlfriend considering what happened. Would you fellas continue plating her or would you drop? If it bothers you that much, then drop her. Abundance mentality, and get more plates. After all, she’s just a plate,… Read more »
I love me too
You have good taste
of course you do
I lust you too
I know
Become interesting (person-hood sense of self) Whole body integration
Love the exchange (mating dance)
Love women endless curiosity.
Nature has designed us well. We are all born separate and unattached to any woman. We are born with a dick and balls generating billions of sperm evolved to fuck as many desirable women as we can acquire and tolerate. That is our nature. Why feel confused, ashamed, timid, or uncertain about it? I do recommend discernment, but not of my nature. I recommend discerning who is and who is not suitable to fuck, do business with, marry, go fishing with, etc. but I do not discern my natural instinct. It is what it is, part of me, cannot be… Read more »
Methinks @NotBornThisMorning is taking it a bit personally, lol. What, could something like this have happened to him? Uh huh… The woman is merely getting her vadge pounded, you pearl clutching nitwit, NBTM. She wants to be fucked silly and have drama and be on a roller coaster and work for her man and be uncertain. She craves that. She wants to be dominated. But fuckface here doesn’t have the balls to be a man with her. So, she gets it elsewhere. No reason to hate her. It’s like hating gravity. And remember, this guy is posting this all to… Read more »
NBTM
” You owe no one anything and certainly not in exchange for being a man.”
What if Sexual runaway forced us to die if we didn’t mate? What if the 80/20 rule applied to all living sapiens in every culture?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRamtqFByWc
http://amzn.to/2ePztT6
@scribblerg
Nothing personal, no personal experience like it. Its the whole asstard situation I find pathetic. I get you and agree, she wants to be properly fucked by him…maybe. But not really…..because…why would she be shit testing him for a fuck like that after shacking up with him and knowing he is the pathetic beta he is? Just not rational? Can’t keep her men straight? Limited options? Desperation? Maybe, but what else can she expect to get other than what she knew she was getting into to begin with?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dRXA1_e30o
http://amzn.to/2esxS7G
http://handle.dtic.mil/100.2/ADA316729
https://www.ted.com/talks/robert_sapolsky_the_uniqueness_of_humans
Being male is underrated…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNnIGh9g6fA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOAgplgTxfc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-PpDq1WUtAw
(Game)
Realistically, his only solutions are like the ones I suggested. At best a part of him exists forever in her beta bin. Anything he does at this point to dominate is not real domination because it is acting in response to her dominance. It’s done with her, he will never be fully respected by her. Every dominate action he takes will always be suspected theatrics at some level. His place in her mind is established. He can transform, but his masculinity will always be considered transformed in her mind, never originally authentic. He will never be able to completely sexually… Read more »
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2CN5nhmfxk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZGaIXD1i5c
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByalBx85iC8
Clear boundaries
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EI3lckqaSk0
https://www.ratical.org/ratville/CAH/warisaracket.pdf
interesting i found something
https://m.popxo.com/2016/04/confessions-of-a-girl-who-cheated-on-her-boyfriend
liverwurst wasn’t terrible, but its best in just small amounts. the minerally, bloody taste builds up on its self. might be better with some eggs
frustrated, so went out…but as usual, nothing is there. i was hoping to get little practice in before i go out to a few bars on the weekend for halloween (which i am really not looking forward to).
just frustrating there is nowhere to go where i can find girls to practice on. occasionally I will get lucky, but most times there is just nothing out.
For self amusement right now it’s hard to beat “Harley Quinn” as a topic.
Barrista / hair cutter / retail clerk girl: “Whatcha dressin’ up as this weekend? (smirk) Not Harley Quinn, like all the other girls, I hope?”
Etc.
For chatting with men – “Dude, got a drinking game for you. Next Saturday, take a drink every time you see a girl dressed as Harley. Beer only, don’t get too soused!”.
Have fun!
Devastatingly concise. This is like brain surgery for the Blue Pill mind.
Got a recently married friend of a friend who needs to read this. Her actions say “I don’t value you” – and the guy’s response says”I don’t value me either.” I know from experience. Sadly, unless one discovers the manosphere and the Red Pill, mainstream culture will just tell a guy to keep being nice.
In other words, an unrespectable doormat.
Keep up the great work Rollo. You’re saving lives.
Scray is right:
https://www.buzzfeed.com/chrissymahlmeister/anything-but-average
We’re doomed.
@Stomp. Good article. He was ok with the cheating “was I ok with it?” That’s the essence of hypergamy. Do you as a woman want to be with a guy who thinks its ok to cheat and continue? I’ve had two plates who I know met or fucked other guys. Even though they were plates I had to cut them lose. The idea of me being some girls plate is not ok with me. This is different from banging a girl with a bf. In that situation there is no expectation. But even with plates there is a delicate balance… Read more »
[…] Rational Male Blog von Rollo Tomassi fand ich einen Kommentar eines Lesers aus Deutschland, der etwas vertweifelt […]
@ Rollo
Man, wtf???
Nuh-uhhh!!!!!
Scray is right:
https://www.buzzfeed.com/chrissymahlmeister/anything-but-average
We’re doomed.
Careful boys, it’s a trap.
like that guy in the short skirt photo,his face is hidden to protect the desperate.
@Scray
Even captain alpha gets boring, eventueven, sorry.
That’s why chicks in a relationship need drama. You have to vary the emotions and their degrees in the woman. It can’t be all emotional roller coaster all the time.
Women in relationships require tingles, comfort, validation, and…drama.
@kfg “to some extent, even LTR’ing AT ALL is BETA” No shit. Yepyepyepyepyessssir! You can be a red pill beta in a LTR and have enough alpha qualities to make a go of the relationship. You can create drama simply by flaking on your woman. I flaked by mistake and Mrs. Gamer was crying over it in the middle of sex. I had to stop and hold her and wipe away her tears. Mrs. Gamer wouldn’t tell me why she was crying…said that it was better if I didn’t know. She liked the comfort and was eager for fun&games ™… Read more »
FLCL
“https://www.buzzfeed.com/chrissymahlmeister/anything-but-average”
Lol… Losing weight is too hard, let’s delude the whole world into thinking these women are not ugly!
It’s an endless road trip to nowhere.
Scray: “to some extent, even LTR’ing AT ALL is BETA”
KFG: “No shit.”
ASD: “Yippee ki-ay, motherfucker! You can be a red pill beta in a LTR and have enough alpha qualities to make a go of the relationship.”
Me: “Yes.”
MAN THE HARPOONS!!!
“Women in relationships require tingles, comfort, validation, and…drama.”
They need a bullet to the head.
Peace at last.
Grunge hamster, be grown up
Lobster of revenge, bring it along
Ride on shooting star
Searching for you, and in withdrawal syndrome
I told a lie
she said she realized what she’d done
She isn’t telling him what she has done, and she’s leaving early and staying out late for a reason, and it has nothing to do with him, it’s about her getting pounded at every opportunity. I know – I’ve been the guy women like that are leaving to see… This guy is an idiot – he really needs to punt on this broad and go on a fuck-everything-that-moves vacation to get back his man-card. As it is, he’s just a chump…
Geeks. Geeks everywhere……..
“You can be a red pill beta in a LTR and have enough alpha qualities to make a go of the relationship.” You can be an impudent red pill, considerably greater beta and have alpha qualities to make a relationship with a greater feminine woman actually work. I for one celebrate the greater beta, lesser Alpha, like ASDgamer. It is a working model that gets the girl, absent one-itis. Some people, Scray included, ask: “why the fuck bother?” Only you can answer that. With you working model. The answer is: Cause. “to get the girl” without possessing her. Despite the… Read more »
http://wp.me/p5MelF-1u7
The cure is coming, but it won’t be male disengagement, red pill fathering or any attempts to properly attach shame to deceit in the female mind. The cure is: the end of privacy. Think how quickly we’ve progressed to carrying gps/microphones in our pockets. People don’t care. I don’t actually care. Won’t be long until a few augmented reality killer apps normalize people wearing face mounted cameras,Google glass etc. External demands to largely abandon the policy of privacy will severely hamstring the bilking of beta males. Meanwhile AF has already been optimized by an algorithm; Tinder. VR porn isn’t going… Read more »
@theasd no thanks. that sounds like catering to her for no real reason. once again, why is she so special? why am I catering to her need for drama after I got what I wanted from her originally? I can go out there tonight with the materials you got, make myself fifteen thousand dollars! Tonight! In two hours! Can you? Can you? Go and do likewise! these days….hate to say it, but like lol….the SECOND I get a whiff of drama or even DTR’ing or ‘you just seem like you want sex’ or whatever other bullshit it’s pretty much an… Read more »
Rollo + others please watch this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbGnaCNEgg0
Bill Burr is very red pill aware. He jokes that women aren’t accountable for their actions. In times gone past women would’ve faced physical abuse and now they don’t.
There’s another video, “Bill Burr on feminism” on youtube.
Just knowing about the problem isn’t enough. Solutions however unpalatable must be assessed.
@ The Mace Stomp
> interesting i found something
> https://m.popxo.com/2016/04/confessions-of-a-girl-who-cheated-on-her-boyfriend
Thanks for the link. Awesome insight in the mind of a cheating woman (lots of feelz and hamstering as the red pill aware man can expect) and the consequences of letting it slide.
How does formatting works in these comments? *markdown?* html? something else?
He can’t be “less alpha” when he is the quintessential equa-mentalist beta.
Sure, he’s not an alpha in absolute terms. But he’s being less alpha than before by forgiving her and wiping the tears from her eyes. Think of it as a thermometer. Temperature is falling.
Or here’s a less abstract model of what happened: The guy doesn’t care enough to get upset about her messing around with other men. Bad sign, right?
popxo article above
My boyfriend and I are still together, and if anything our relationship is stronger because of this incident [her cheating]. But I am now more skeptical of the relationship rules against so-called “cheating” which are laid down for us. I still struggle with all these questions about what it means to be in a committed relationship blah blah
Yup, sure seems stronger.
I just got the wall of text from my plate I dumped. Tl;dr she cares for me but I’m not offering commitment so in her mind going on dinner dates with other guys is ok and I should be ok with that too because I’m a grown up and she fucks me and so I should be glad to have someone so thoughtful and caring as her and I shouldn’t “cage” her by suggesting she not go out with other guys ….my eyes hurt mid-way through and I was laughing first at the total lack of accountability but also the… Read more »
Buzzfeed fat girl parade: One of the reasons why we have less sex in spite of all the degeneracy. It doesn’t matter if you’re a tattooed fetish anime slut.
Also, it’s lunacy, isn’t it? Those women are in their 20s (I suppose) but literally look like they’re post-wall in their 40s. So brave.
Also, this shows it’s getting easier for women to compete all the time. Just eat like a normal human, don’t become a hog, and you’re getting ahead already. In a Red Queen race when the others refuse to even jog, they will disappear behind you quickly.
At one time, the rule was “if she smokes, she fucks”. Then they stopped smoking and girls had to get tattoos to show they weren’t nice girls. Too bad tattoos don’t lessen appetites.
Hence, I blame the anti-smoking campaign for the fat girl epidemic.
EhIntellect I am an occasional lurker and poster in the comments here. I’m also working on turning my marriage around and running a MAP after reading MMSL. The posters Sentient and Having A Bad Day have helped me before, but it is slow going. I’m much better than I used to be but for quite a few months now it just feels like I am locked in a constant frame battle with the wife. Especially things like when she says I don’t say “I love you” to her every day like I used to, I can’t always tell if it… Read more »
@walawala
Irrelevant I Have 1 Bat & 2 Balls
@IAS Carrying this one forward because it’s relevant to today’s article. “Tyler goes “Do you guys want to have children too?” *crickets* “What has happened with society?”” lol and these are guys SIGNING UP to learn how to get laid, they’re not even MGTOW or grasseaters or AFCs who won’t bang more than a couple girls in their life…these guys are actively trying to GET girls but the white picket fence 2.5 kids with a loving doting wife is probably not a reality them or most of their friends/peers have or grew up with. The drapes are on fire and… Read more »
Slight side track on the main topic, has anyone in their female interactions been told that they look “kind”, “nice”, or “have an honest face”, sometimes being told after engaging in conversation that, this was known beforehand prior to even saying anything?
Reposting my Halloween rant cause I’ll be too busy sarging to post this weekend and it’s still early enough to make sure you have tickets etc to a venue (and even if you don’t, go sarge the streets, lineups, and any venues NEAR the ticket venue because there WILL be spill-over into all the shitty dead venues around the prime ones as girls who don’t want to wait in line or who forgot to buy tickets or get bored of the first venue (’cause they didn’t meet you in it and decided they’d have better luck at another venue) etc… Read more »
YaReally Sentient HABD Wala Hank Scray & PUA Gang Quick FR from Small Town purgatory Most unusually I went out for a few drinks yesterday in Small Town with a visiting friend/work contact. Even more unusually a bar nearby had a few decent looking waitresses – a couple of 7s and a 6. My friend is totally BP married (although tall, decent looking and built like a linebacker) so I couldn’t do too much as he’s also work-connected. But it was funny because the 6 came over with a big smile and EC and touched my arm when taking my… Read more »
SCray Yareally “How long has your longest LTR been?” Oops, careful Scray, Sentient is onto you. Hoping he tells us how long his longest mono LTR with a <25yo 8+/10 in the past few years who he made give up her social media for him has been. Don't you get it brah, he's still exciting to his post-wall wife who hasn't grown up with an Instagram account, it's exactly the same for guys now. lol But despite "As Rollo often says: “familiarity, comfort and rapport are anti-seductive elements in a man’s Game.”", we still have to explain how monogamy can… Read more »
Yareally But despite “As Rollo often says: “familiarity, comfort and rapport are anti-seductive elements in a man’s Game.””, we still have to explain how monogamy can possibly get boring to guys who are just too badass for life with them to EVER be boring. Ohhh? But wait! It’s the most logical thing in the world to do if you understand that the point of a shit-test isn’t to hope the guy fails, it’s to hope the guy PASSES and demonstrates that she’s attracted to an alpha. When would she need reassurance that she’s with an alpha MORE than right after… Read more »
@walawala
“I just got the wall of text from my plate I dumped…”
I’m curious – I might be approaching something like that soon. At what point is it acceptable for her to see other guys without you (me) caring. FWB? FB? Just meet up for sex and spend no $ on her like dinners/movies?
Way off topic, but WTF?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3870880/New-Zealand-Woman-named-Poison-Ivy-grooms-unstable-men-commit-suicide.html
@YaReally
“Actually that’s maybe a thing I should write up sometime when I have free time…a MGTOW guide for just the bare minimum stuff they should be aware of with regards to how to spin plates and avoid Buyer’s Remorse/dangers”
Dude, make my day
@ YaReally, 100% agree. They should learn gun safety – lol. They’re so caught up in their own hug box narrative of not having anything to do with women…. EVER; and then they decide they want to play with a loaded gun (just this one time) and accidentally shoot themselves with it. That is so true.The other beef I have with them is their narrow mindedness. I mean…..I started off as a bitter MGTOW as you well know – lol. I just got tired of hearing the same BS from them over and over again. I wasn’t learning anything new… Read more »
“At one time, the rule was “if she smokes, she fucks”.”
The Alpha Widow working her stuff:
The alpha widow, showing how it’s done.
There was a time when “tough” for a woman, was actually sexy.
That’s before tough meant “turn yourself into a man, or as close as you can”.
Bacall reminds me, for all the talk of women and “boredom” men can get bored too.
Hence, the old saying, “for every hot woman there’s a man tired of fucking her”.
It behooves a woman to work on that angle too. But the era of land whales makes the gazelles lazy. And if a one-trick pony dopey show is all you’ve got, well, it’s still far preferable to the nasty bitch.
“There was a time when “tough” for a woman, was actually sexy.”
And that is why I have always preferred the “inferior remake” to the original. Yeah, Bergman was pretty enough, but she was such a dopey, weepy little thing it made her revolting.
Casablanca is a romance for teenage girls.
To Have and Have Not is a romance for grown men.
@YaReally: on that particular MRP “FR” that I linked I think the guy shouldn’t take the wife back. Maybe he can take her back as a “Primary” and she will accept that with gratitude if he has enough game. This is why I wondered a while back about demoting a wife, in analogy with demoting a FWB to plate. But you pointed out (I think correctly) lots of drama would ensue unless there was a reason. In that case the guy has a reason. Also, the wife got together with 1 super beta guy that she admitted to, who knows… Read more »
Do not fuck around and take a woman that’s been fucking another guy back, for the love of God.
Wtf is going on here????
Keep.It.Moving.Period.
@Blaximus
“Do not fuck around and take a woman that’s been fucking another guy back, for the love of God.
Wtf is going on here????
Keep.It.Moving.Period.”
This is 100% right. Good lord.
Smoking increases T levels in men and women. Probably the real reason for the decline in T levels in men since 70s is the decline in smoking (plus the obesity epidemic).
In women, the increase in T levels due to smoking will mean that they want to have sex more.
T levels decrease after 40
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-iWSa60-gyM
What a wonderful world.
Lately the comment waters are getting mudier than the Mississippi. What gives? YSG’s, spin all the plates you can. What’s the point of all of the mental gymnastics and cuck-like game playing? Stop it. Do not volunteer to keep leaping into bitche’s frames. Some days I gotta double check what blog I’m reading. Dominate and control these broads and fuck all of these gyrations. Boring? Don’t be boring for yourself. Newsflash – it’s not hard. Bored? How is that even possible? Have you travelled everywhere you possibly could? Is your knowledge base so massive that there’s nothing you could possibly… Read more »
@Saracen 3 : “”The giveaway here is that she sent a text as soon as it happened,
Two-timing bitches don’t do that.””
please explain. I don’t see a difference between texting right away out of guilt or waiting out of guilt.
Or maybe she realized that there was a witness to her makeout and leaving with the guy.
@theasd no thanks. that sounds like catering to her for no real reason. once again, why is she so special? why am I catering to her need for drama after I got what I wanted from her originally? The context is an LTR where you promised exclusivity and likely cohabitation. (Of course, you avoid bruising the girls’ ego if she’s high self-esteem.) My list is about the emotional needs of girls in LTRs. If you want to manage a girl’s emotions and keep her relatively sane, you fulfill her emotional needs. Think of it as constant gaming. Otoh, if you… Read more »
IAS who knows if the guy should care – Betas mate guard, Alphas disregard/i> This is a very nuanced topic… it all depends on how it is done. At a certain point a failure to do anything is a beta move. And letting your girl be fucked by another dude is a beta move… though many will try and couch it as outcome independence. The difference is whether you are exercising proprietary claim over the girl or not, if she is just some random girl you don’t give a rat’s ass about… OK all well and good. At the end… Read more »
@Auvergnat October 26, 2016 at 1:48 am How does formatting works in these comments? *markdown?* html? something else? formatting works as HTML except you use the less than and greater than symbols instead of brackets [……\]. @Ya “It’s like covering up the cockpit windows on a plane and trusting all those instruments on the dashboard to help you fly and land the plane…you can see how much people REALLY believe those instruments work, and how many think they only work when you’re below a certain altitude or on the ground or are just LARP’ing that they believe the instruments because… Read more »
who knows if the guy should care – Betas mate guard, Alphas disregard/i>
I can think of one circumstance where alphas will mate guard…if the mate signals that she wants guarding. Mrs. Gamer has done that exactly once in several decades. Yeah, there was an alpha hitting on her. He didn’t do that again and I didn’t mind him dancing with Mrs. Gamer after he asked my permission on another night.