Open Cuckoldry

forever

During the Q&A section of the Man in Demand talk I gave back in September I was asked about where I believed the social dynamic of Open Hypergamy would lead. In specific the idea was proposed, and I agree, that the logical next step for a social order founded on feminine Hypergamy and one that prioritizes the female sexual strategy as preeminent would lead to a state of openly accepted cuckoldry.

Although I can’t say it’s an accepted social dynamic as yet, there are many social indicators that are revealing this push towards a normalized cuckoldry. I’ll explore these for a bit in this essay, but for now these indicators are about a move away from conventional monogamy in the hopes that a ‘soft cuckoldry’ might be a precursor to instituting a more accepted open cuckoldry.

I think it’s also important to keep in mind a couple of primary principles about this shift. First is the fact that, initially, an openly accepted state of feminine-controlled cuckoldry will never be called ‘cuckoldry’ proper. If we use the example of a socially accepted (if not celebrated) open Hypergamy as a model, open cuckoldry will be sold as a more logical, more humane sexual strategy for men and women in light of divorce statistics, romantic boredom and other sexual studies that indicate men and women weren’t evolved for monogamous commitment.

The second is that open cuckoldry is the extension of a unilaterally feminine controlled Hypergamy. That is to say that as Hypergamy becomes more normalized as a social imperative that sexual strategy will extend to optimizing Hypergamy across genders. If that optimization is taken to its logical end it will require men not just to adopt cuckoldry as a norm, but to socially reward them for advocating it among their own sex.

Cuckoldry By Any Other Name

As I said, it wont be called ‘cuckoldry’; the connotations are negative, so a redefining will be made in order to make the practice more socially palatable. The Feminine Imperative wont recruit the very men it needs to perpetuate cuckoldry as their own sexual strategy if the term is derogatory. Thus we’ll get euphemisms for alternative lifestyles, ‘open marriages’ or a “Designer Relationship“:

We live in an era when everything is customizable. Relationships are no exception. Some people will continue to practice their grandparents’ form of monogamy, and others, probably the majority, will be serially exclusive and pair-bonded. Still others will explore some form of non-monogamous expression that encompasses one or more of the facets we’ve discussed or may flow in and out of being exclusive based on what the relationship requires. (We’ve done this ourselves.) Having the ability to customize a relationship means having the freedom to respond to life’s vicissitudes.

The first time I came across the concept of ‘soft polygamy’ I was in a behavioral psychology class exploring the practices of modern marriage and contrasting them with the long term sexual behaviors of men and women. As you might imagine the context of the study focused entirely on the ‘bad behaviors’ of men who essentially transitioned from serial monogamy to serial marriage. The idea was that in the process of moving from one LTR to another men were establishing a soft form of polygamy.

In a social respect, men have far more to lose from serial marriages than do women. The financial liabilities of divorce are well known to the manosphere, but so are the emotional and familial accountabilities. So from a strictly male perspective, serial LTRs are a dicey prospect, but from a female perspective, in a feminine-primary social order, institutionalized Hypergamy and the soft polygamy that results from the Sandbergian sexual strategy, soft cuckoldry becomes pragmatic in optimizing Hypergamy for women.

At this point we should consider the Heartiste maxim about feminism again:

The feminist goal is removing all constraints on female sexuality while maximally restricting male sexuality

Institutionalized cuckoldry is the logical means to restricting male sexuality, but we have to consider what function that restriction serves for women. From an Alpha Fucks / Beta Bucks perspective the plan is simple; restrict that sexuality as women find need for a particular man’s service.

Diamonds and Rust

While I’m reluctant to prognosticate, my guess is that future generations of men will be conditioned to accept their role in this cuckoldry as part of their socialization. The above Forevermark diamond advertisement is one illustration of this. Open Hypergamy and its acceptance has already made its popular debut in mainstream media and advertising, and likewise open cuckoldry is just now finding a social foothold.

It takes the Red Pill Lens to appreciate the efforts as they’re being made by a large society. The Forevermark ad is intended to be funny or cute, but it belies a deeper, more poignant truth about Alpha Widows, Hypergamy and the long term sexual strategy Plan and roles women expect men to play in it.

I was made aware of this ad being circulated from a reader on Twitter and at first thought it was a reworked joke. It is however legit and billboards with this campaign are up in major cities. Without the benefit of a Red Pill Lens I can see how most men would laugh it off or women might giggle sardonically about it, but the the fact remains that a clever copywriter is aware of the sexual dynamics that make it funny.

I pulled the following quote from Deti on one of Dalrock’s more recent post:

“I think what we will continue to see is growing disengagement.”

Yeah, this has been discussed here and elsewhere in the almost 5 years I’ve been around here.

I think that what will happen is that things will continue sliding in the same direction they’re going now, until a critical mass is reached. I don’t know what that critical mass is, what will trigger it, or when it will be reached.

We live in a mostly free society with a hybrid of capitalism and socialism. We have maximum freedom and autonomy right now, with both sexes being free to pursue pretty much whatever they want, however they want to. That is the prime characteristic driving the current circumstance — that, and up to now, there’s been enough money taxed, borrowed and stolen to pay for it.

A growing number of men are not getting as much sex as they want. A growing number of women aren’t getting commitments in the form they want — when they want or from the men they want.

So things are going to keep sliding that way. More and more men will walk away and direct what energies they have left elsewhere — into work, or beer/bros/Xbox/porn, or travel/leisure. (Oddly enough, this might make many of them more attractive to women, since they’re spending less time directing their attentions to women.) More and more men will earn just enough to support themselves, since they don’t plan on marriage, and fatherhood is out of the question. They will lack the skills to improve their lives. They will not get nearly as much sex as they want, but they will learn to live with it — mostly through porn, the occasional hookup, and the even more occasional prostitute. The price of prostitutes will skyrocket as demand increases; and a few more women will go into high-end call girl work to earn side money.

More and more women will direct their attentions into their work, travel/leisure, and having children without men. (This will definitely make more of them less attractive to men except as on again, off again sex partners.) They will not get the commitments from men they want, but they will learn to live with it. They will complain about it with increasing volume and shrillness, but they’ll learn to live with it.

Until something happens to cause the tides to turn. Again – don’t know what, or when, or how. But something will happen to cause a hard reset. And it will be exquisitely painful for everyone. I don’t want it to happen, nor do I relish it. It’s not something to desire or look forward to because of the pain it will bring. But I do think it will happen. I don’t think it will happen in my lifetime or my kids’ lifetimes. We could easily slide like this for another 50 to 100 years.

I think one consequence of this separation of the genders will include a socially normalized institution of cuckoldry. To take hold it will need to be termed something different, but in effect the process of women conceiving with one man and then expecting another man to parentally invest himself in that child will be a casual expectation of women. With so many men effectively (if not intentionally) going their own way, the idea that any man wouldn’t be expected to serve as a surrogate parent will become commonplace.

Genders divided by feminism or feminine social primacy will need a ‘customized’ form of cuckoldry that allows for the Alpha Fucks side of Hypergamy to be reconciled with the Beta Bucks side by enlisting different men for either purpose.

The Pink Pill

I want to end here with an essay I read recently on the fallout of the new female form of Viagra:

In an infamous cartoon in The New Yorker in 2001, one woman confides to a friend over drinks: ‘I was on hormone replacement for two years before I realized what I really needed was Steve replacement.’ Medicine has been reluctant to engage the question of just how much monogamy and long-term togetherness affect sexual function and desire, and the ‘Steve’ problem remains an issue that is tacitly acknowledged and yet under-discussed. To return to Julie’s growing pile of self-help titles, the books all promise to return, revive, restore without really getting down to the brass tacks of why desire extinguished in the first place. As Julie notes, the honeymoon grinds to an end, but the issues leading there are complex. In short supply is attention to the way mind and body react to social structures such as popular media, faith and marriage.

To develop drugs to boost libido is like ‘giving antibiotics to pigs because of the shit they’re standing in’

The American psychologist Christopher Ryan argues that the institution of modern marriage – meaning an exclusive couple bound by romantic love – is antithetical to long-term excitement. Ryan is best known for Sex at Dawn (2010), a book authored with his wife Cacilda Jethá, that makes the case that sexual monogamy is deeply at odds with human nature. He is among a growing number of researchers suggesting that the rift between women’s purportedly limitless sexual potential and their dulled actuality might owe to the circumstances of intimacy. Accordingly, the conjugal bed is not only the scene of dwindling desire, but its fundamental cause. The elements that strengthen love – reciprocity, closeness, emotional security – can be the very things that smother lust. While love angles toward intimacy, desire flourishes across a distance.

The entire article is very insightful if not a bit depressing, but with the Red Pill Lens we can begin to understand the latent purpose behind the message. I’ve gone on record about the pushback against clearing the pink pill for use as being a direct threat to women’s control of their own Hypergamy. The concern, ostensibly, is that a libido stimulating drug might be used to induce a woman into having sex that her otherwise sober sense would prevent; effectively it could be a ‘rape’ drug.

What’s finally being addressed in this article however is what I’ve been saying since I was aware of the drug’s trials – a chemical that induces libido in women removes an element of their control in sexual selection and compromises Hypergamy. I’m not entirely sure the author was aware of the points she was revealing in this, but she succinctly makes the case for both institutionalized cuckoldry (or certainly a ‘customized’ soft polygamy for women) and advocates for women maintaining control of their Hypergamy unclouded by a drug that would remove that control by chemically inducing them into sex that isn’t of their own choosing.

The ‘cure’ to women’s low libido is holistic, not biological. Women’s sexual deficiencies are presumed not to be the result of a ‘broken’ biology, but rather a lack of proper motivation. I should point out that all of this validates all the points I was making about Dread in marriage last month on Biblical Gender Roles – maintaining a condition of proper motivation (i.e. Dread), the holistic cure, is exactly what even femosphere authors are tacitly advocating.

The elements that strengthen love – reciprocity, closeness, emotional security – can be the very things that smother lust.

Yet now, even when a pharmaceutical solution to the lust problem is made available the ‘cure’ is rejected. Why? Because on a root, limbic level women’s hindbrains know that Hypergamy cannot be optimized with a drug that removes Hypergamous choice. The real solution has never changed and women are now put into a position of having to openly acknowledge that for all of the pretense of “mismatched libidos” or “sex just declines after marriage” social conventions, men’s cuckoldry is the real plan for Hypergamy.

When presented with a pill that will make them sexual, when given a cure to their low sex drives with the men who’ve made lifetime commitments to them, women will still refuse to take it. Hypergamous doubt can’t be quelled with a pill.

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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theasdgamer
8 years ago

This song hits so many Red Pill beta themes: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wn2e4Dhod7M “I tried so hard my dear to show that you’re my every dream Yet you’re afraid each thing I do is just some evil scheme” Betas are creepy guys. “Another love before my time made your heart sad and blue And so my heart is paying now for things I didn’t do” You’re an alpha widow. I can’t give you the emotional roller coaster you need. “In anger unkind words are said that make the teardrops start Why can’t you free your doubtful mind, and melt your cold cold heart”… Read more »

Andy
8 years ago

@YaReally is on fire.

Listen to what he’s saying as it’s spot on. I’ve dated the type of girls in the age group that I’ve always wanted now in my 30’s than I was ever able to pull off in my younger days. I can only imagine this getting even better as I age and my game improves.

Dutchman
Dutchman
8 years ago

ASD’s Hank Williams post makes me wonder:

How would somebody like Julien Blanc do if you could put them in a time machine to go back to, like, 1948? Female nature and biomechanical preferences were the same as they are now, but the society was WAYYYYYYYYY different. Would a dude like that who obviously has super tight game still be able to pull women left and right by upping his discretion and recalibrating?

agent p
agent p
8 years ago

@yareally Don’t worry, I wouldn’t have pulled that move if I thought it was potentially fatal. I fucked her the next morning and all was cool, she didn’t even mention ANYTHING about it, which means she actually felt silly about being so butt hurt in the first place. I took the RP back in early 2013 and have entirely recalibrated the relationship since then. I do indeed reward the good behaviour with positive reinforcement. Part of my pulling that with her the other day was to deliberately invoke a bitchy response. She just started a new job and her anxiety… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Andy – I don’t know if this is your real name and that’s your real pic but I’d suggest you consider going more anonymous if it is. This site is already blocked by some firewalls and is considered a “hate site” by the radical fringe. I would not at all be shocked to see this place become a target of radfems and SJWs at some point and all who participate being Doxxed and outed to the degree possible. Such people have already ruined many men’s careers and lives for less. I made myself more anonymous earlier this year as a… Read more »

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago

It sure this is ever going away

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

Update on my HB8/9, sigh (28 yrs old). She’s an alpha widow and a lane changer who was playing me to suck me in but had me in a beta/provider frame. Hey, that’s okay, it was a great learning experience and also was fun (fucked her once, but it was not great). But reading YaReally’s comments it just really striking a chord about how ruined this chick was by her age. As I got to know her better it became clear she had been insane cock carousel rider and also a stripper etc when younger, but now was changing lanes… Read more »

benfromtexas
benfromtexas
8 years ago
Reply to  scribblerg

Good job. Been there done that.

YaReally
8 years ago

@IAS Don’t do it. They’re starting to venture into more “show the audience” style filming: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WjuD0cu5o0 They may or may not do more of these, but I wouldn’t chance it either way especially as a married guy. The good information will probably get posted on YouTube anyway. The only reason to go to a Free Tour is to maybe find some wingmen but even then you have the risk of having your face shown so that’s a no-go as far as I’m concerned. @scribblerg Thanks for that link (I probably wouldn’t have seen it because of course no news sites… Read more »

bluepillprofessor
8 years ago

@Wild man: “redirecting the orgiastic output into your spine, so you don’t actually spill seed?”

All this is covered in The Way of the Superior Lover by David Dieda.

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

“How would somebody like Julien Blanc do if you could put them in a time machine to go back to, like, 1948?”:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LF_chuSy9G4

Game is game.

Klem
Klem
8 years ago

@yareally

By any chance, did you check out “The Program” by RSDJeffy?
Overall it’s good advice for online dating beginners, but I found the infields pretty weak (I know, it’s easy to criticize..) like when he says he has to consciously remind himself to look the girls in the eyes wtf?!

I don’t know if it’s because I’ve done a lot of online dating, but Julien’s infield from SHIFT kinda blew my mind, whereas Jeffy’s not so much, I even cringed a bit to be honest.

Klem
Klem
8 years ago

Also, for guys doing online dating, try Happn
It’s really cool when you have a 9-5 job that’s rather relaxed : you can message the girls who work in the buildings around you, meet them during their smoke break, escalate a bit, keep messaging them during the day to build comfort and meet them for a drink in an after-work bar around then pull quickly
Really really fun!
It’s also good because it trains you to game sober and in the daylight, makes regular day game easier.

bluepillprofessor
8 years ago

@Yareally:

Reposted and linked on Married Red Pill.

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3vvveo/dominance_moves_that_get_her_wet_from_the_worlds/

This shit is not just for PUA’s. Believe it or not, wives respond quite well to James Deen techniques. Thanks Bro! Yareally lighting it up today.

rugby11
8 years ago

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mCdnuyknaEo
Yareally
Thanks man again you work is amazing.

redlight
redlight
8 years ago

“minefield camouflaged to look like a bouncy castle”

that’s a great line

keep on this roll guys, loving it all

Not Born This Morning
8 years ago

Run boy run. Jump boy jump. “How high mommy how high?” “How fast mommy how fast?” “How strong mommy how strong?” “Tell me mommy what is my burden of performance, tell me mommy.” “Tell me what I must do with myself mommy so I will be approved” “Tell me mommy what it means to be a man mommy because I know it not”. “Tell me mommy how much must I spend to be a man” “Tell me mommy what is the price of self esteem since you have commodified it for me” “Tell me mommy what it means to be… Read more »

bnon
bnon
8 years ago

@Rollo

>@bnon, I just hate being right all the time.

I’m not so sure about that.

What I’m saying is that outlines of possible bad stuff to come, without counter-action proposals, just help the opposition.

bnon
bnon
8 years ago

@YaReally

Nice link on your 10 year age gap perspective.

Are all your rants only scattered all over different pages, or is there something more united to read?

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

@bnon

http://yareallyarchive.com/

Gold mine.

rugby11
8 years ago
Reply to  Andy

@Yareally
http://howtomakemecome.tumblr.com/

averagechump
8 years ago

@yareally From what I’ve gathered reading your posts, exterior things (looks, money, clothes, etc.) aren’t all that important. Do you think they’re not important because (1) in a given venue, or out on the street, there will always be a guy just as good looking and wealthy as you? – or (2) because women deep down really do not care about these things? I’m at this point where I’m probably as good looking as I’ll get. It really seems like a big waste of time “pumping iron” in order to get the perfect physique. For some reason I highly doubt… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Ya etc – Re: SilverFox game. The hardest thing for us older guys to get is the correct internal POV. It doesn’t help that some of use are a bit overweight or worn down or frustrated or bald(ing), or all the above. It also goes against all social programming. Think about it. We’ve been told our entire lives that older guys like us should not be fucking 20 somethings. That there is something immoral and defective for wanting to do so. We are called pathetic and sad and disgusting – how can we help but not internalize all that? But… Read more »

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

@scribblerg

Nice post man. I get so jealous of you single guys that have time, and 20 somethings… lol. Must be nice/daunting knowing that “the sky’s the limit.”

hoellenhund2
8 years ago

Complexity – Could our grandfathers have imagined the world we exist in today just 100 years ago? A complex system like human civilization – 8x larger than it was 100 years ago – is going to evolve (not technically evolution, fyi) in ways that we simply can’t imagine. Just consider if we hadn’t created the internet. I’d say the pace of evolution is difficult to imagine, but its direction isn’t. Consider the recent decision of the Supreme Court on the legality of same-sex marriage. Is it surprising that it happened as soon as 2015? Somewhat. Is it surprising that it… Read more »

Dutchman
Dutchman
8 years ago

@YaReally

Where are the “archives” Tyler is talking about in that vid?

hoellenhund2
8 years ago

Then came a point when he just shuttered In Mala Fide and I was dumbfounded as to why. From what I could gather he was facing false rape charges (allegedly) and closed shop in what I thought was a similar situation to Roissy when he had his run before shifting to CH. Then he came back and aligned himself with Roosh’s projects at RoK and Reaxxion until GamerGate flamed out for Roosh. I hate to think he’s just riding Roosh, but even Roosh hasn’t really come up with anything notable since his Canada trip. Both these guys have gone mainly… Read more »

SJB
SJB
8 years ago

scribblerg – I am nodding in agreement with your comment; specifically: “Why are you the prize, still?”

That question raises great anxiety within. Part of it is I do not have an answer; another part is knowing I’ve let myself be trained out of thinking of an answer.

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Andy – Just know that I would gladly trade it all for having an intact marriage/family with a good, submissive woman, 4 kids and my first grandkid on the way now. I’m making lemonade of my lemons. What else is left for me? Marrying some insane divorcee? The single women my age are garbage. Truly. I think I recounted a “date” i had like a 15 months ago with an “age appropriate woman”. She was like 47 and still not bad looking. I was a bit chubbier which didn’t help and also had almost no game at the time. Our… Read more »

rugby11
8 years ago
Reply to  scribblerg

“Why do women like “jerks”? Simple really, they LEAD, they dont put women on a pedestal, they dominate. These are very masculine traits.”
Don’t wish it were easier wish you where better.

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

Jesus, I don’t know that i have the guts for this. Check out James Marshall getting blown out time after time in NY.
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-HLjw7zSBI&w=560&h=315%5D

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

“Just know that I would gladly trade it all for having an intact marriage/family with a good, submissive woman, 4 kids and my first grandkid on the way now. I’m making lemonade of my lemons.”

@scribblerg

Yeah, I kind of figured. My life isn’t bad. Better than some guys bragging about how great their life is… So. lol. I’m not complaining (anymore). Whoops. My social game is so retarded that I probably have 2 more years where I wouldn’t benefit if I was single anyway.

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Rugby – It’s not that those traits are “masculine”, it’s that they demonstrate that a man values himself more than the woman and that gets them thinking the guy is of higher value cuz if he isn’t kissing her ass, he must have better options with women of higher quality than her. So, she’s more interested.

See how the hamster works? Lol, it ain’t pretty. Don’t “treat ’em like shit” to win them over, treat ’em like shit cuz they are shit…

theasdgamer
8 years ago

@ Andy

My social game is so retarded

Why do you think so? You are very socially aware. Sure, you take risks, but that’s just your masculine personality coming through.

theasdgamer
8 years ago

@ scribbler_g

Jesus, I don’t know that i have the guts for this. Check out James Marshall getting blown out time after time in NY.

He looks like he’s having fun even if he gets “blown out”. He’s outcome independent and he’s bringing the party with him, right?

Loved the “Mormon handshake”.

theasdgamer
8 years ago

@ rugby

Supplicating to and pedestalizing a woman is a DLV–a demonstation of low value. She’s up on the pedestal and therefore has higher status, so the supplicant must be below her and have lower status and therefore he must be of low value.

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

@ASD Meh, chatting online is easy. My in-person skills are lacking when I first meet a person. I think it’s mostly because I haven’t mastered the skill of making the conversation interesting to me yet so I’m just not that engaging or funny, then I just kind of get bored, long pauses, etc. Luckily most of the people I talk to are bored Moms, so they don’t seem to mind. Plus, I’m handsome. 😉 I still have situations where some girl is like staring me down and practically begging me to start a conversation with her. And I don’t. And… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Andy – I’ve detected a bit of the misanthrope in you…Perhaps if you visualized strangling them and shoving them into the trunk of your car, would that give you the emotional spike needed for you to get engaged? Lol. Okay, i’ve got to stop fucking off here. I’m finding it very hard to give a shit about work lately – and it’s my own company, not good…

theasdgamer
8 years ago

@ Andy

Befriend men who are great conversationalists and observe them carefully. If you have trouble befriending them, become their orbiters.

I’ve always tried to ask open-ended questions to get women talking about their favorite subjects–themselves. If you can do that, they’ll think that you’re a brilliant conversationalist.

benfromtexas
benfromtexas
8 years ago
Reply to  theasdgamer

Good advice. I ask open ended questions and I’m good at telling stories with solid emotion spikes. Do research online about how to write a story. I’m a good story teller that incorporates a lot of “chick crack” into the narrative. It’s helped me a lot. Just like @asdgamer said, befriend or be an orbiter of a good talker is always a great thing to do. Women love to talk about themselves and their friends. My stories always involve friends then I’ll ask them about theirs in relation to a story. Ex: travel, relationships, goals, ect…. The girls like my… Read more »

theasdgamer
8 years ago
Reply to  benfromtexas

The emotional component is very important. Asking girls about past pets that they loved produces some of that very important emotional chemistry. Getting them to talk about a deceased beloved relative also produces an emotional spike. If they have ever won an election…won a social battle against another girl…beat another girl to get a guy…what’s their saddest movie…most romantic movie…etc.

Blaximus
Blaximus
8 years ago

” And being able to wield social influence/pressure can be as powerful or more powerful than being able to kick someone’s ass. Everyone caves to social pressure if you can apply enough of it to them…I don’t have to be able to kick your ass if I have multiple guys from the crowd stepping in to kick your ass for touching me because they like me lol No one thinks Donald Trump is going to punch them out, but he intimidates people one on one in a business setting.” YaReally… You are my MAN!!! but…. I disagree fundamentally with this.… Read more »

benfromtexas
benfromtexas
8 years ago
Reply to  Blaximus

I disagree with women too. I never thought it would work so well but it does. I got the idea from a RSD Julien video. It works like a charm.

Is This Thing On?
Is This Thing On?
8 years ago
theasdgamer
8 years ago

@ Blax

Having the ability to bust someone’s ass is invaluable.

Defensive fighting skills are essential–you need to be able to hold out long enough until the Brute Squad arrives. That’s why I’m now using a trainer. Victory through overwhelming betapower!

If you have social dominance, you can persuade the Brute Squad to help you out if some guy gets in your face.

peregrinejohn
peregrinejohn
8 years ago

Then there’s the upcoming “Daddy’s Home”, which is AF/BB presented in movie form for easy digestion by the plugged-in.

Blaximus
Blaximus
8 years ago

@asd I guess I was never taught to look to get bailed out by anyone. If people came to my defense, I was absolutely overjoyed. Basically my defense is a pounding offense. : ) In my mind Social Dominance is something completely different. Social Dominance is the ability to RESIST being led by forces outside of yourself. As noted in one of the vids I posted, mass conformity can be broken by just going against the grain. I don’t advocate some sort of anti-social dickishness just for the hell of it, but I do advocate for not just blindly bowing… Read more »

theasdgamer
8 years ago

@ Blax Basically my defense is a pounding offense. Here’s my basic plan. 1. Be alert to threats. 2. Be aware of potential allies and their locations. 3. Be aware of the terrain and potential weapons at hand. 4. Be aware of avenues of escape. 5. Walk softly and carry a big stick. 6. Run away before fighting. 7. End the fight ASAP if you have to fight, striking to disable. 8. If you have multiple opponents, don’t be afraid to kill. If you haven’t had a lot of experience fighting as a kid, take up wrestling or judo and… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
8 years ago

” While I’m reluctant to prognosticate, my guess is that future generations of men will be conditioned to accept their role in this cuckoldry as part of their socialization. The above Forevermark diamond advertisement is one illustration of this. Open Hypergamy and its acceptance has already made its popular debut in mainstream media and advertising, and likewise open cuckoldry is just now finding a social foothold.” This right here. Maybe the answer to this nonsense is to attempt to train young men not to accept social training as if it were the ” end-all, be-all ” way to live life.… Read more »

A Definite Beta Guy
8 years ago

Re: Western Civilization While the SJWs weaken certain reactions, the actual killers will remain disease and war. Modern disease control still relies mostly on 19th century epidemiology. A degraded CDC and poor disease response means a super-bug out of Pakistan or India is going to kill a lot of people. The US has no serious danger from military confrontation itself, but the same cannot be said about our largest trading partner: the European Union. Which should be considered part of the extended Western Civilization ur-civilization, not unlike Egypt would be considered part of the “Roman Empire” back in the old… Read more »

rugby11
8 years ago

@Rollo Tomassi
http://yaledailynews.com/blog/2015/12/07/erika-christakis-to-end-teaching/
Red pill truths university upset
Censorship is not far at hand.

A Definite Beta Guy
8 years ago

While I’m reluctant to prognosticate, my guess is that future generations of men will be conditioned to accept their role in this cuckoldry as part of their socialization http://therationalmale.com/2013/12/03/saving-the-best/ You’re talking serious gut-level reactions that need silencing here. Most guys I know already tolerate a kind of open hypergamy, which is the whole “serial monogamy” bit that’s been practiced for decades now. But a girl who’s a legit slut? Oh man. I’m sure you’ve seen it, too. When these guys think their girl is a slut, they take a Falcon punch straight in the heart. The most confident, happiest guys… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
8 years ago

@asd I trained as a boxer. Even currently, I know an ex semi-pro boxer who ( tries to ) keep my skills up. He usually just winds up almost breaking my damn ribs. In my younger days I took up various martial arts. I envy the kids today that have access to MMA training schools. As a kid growing up I fought constantly because I was skinny and I was always encouraged to defend myself against all comers. By the time I finished grade school, bullies just didn’t fuck with me because I would always fight back hard. But truth… Read more »

Phil O'Sopher
Phil O'Sopher
8 years ago

I showed the image of the Forevermark advertisement to a woman I’m close with. Her one-sentence response?

“No it won’t.”

theasdgamer
8 years ago

@ Blax When I say, “Run away,” I mean “retreat in an orderly fashion.” Last time someone ignored me when I wanted to give him the fight, I kicked his ass. He was bigger and stronger and less tactical. I got a rep as a badass in my frat after that. I was 5’7″ tall and weighed a mere 135 lbs. I also fought constantly growing up and hated fighting, but loved wrestling with my brother every day. If someone hits the ground, I’m gonna double tap their ribs, then stop. I don’t want them getting up. Then I’ll head… Read more »

Striver
Striver
8 years ago

averagechump: As far as do looks matter, they do and they don’t. Looks and accomplishments do and do not matter. I can see the points about frame/game. But what YaReally sometimes misses is the video guys are in the 99th percentile of game. Most of the time, if you are out, Tyler or Julien is not going to be there. Where I am at, I don’t see a bunch of jacked guys either. But I am in a smaller market. Most of the PUA work seems to come out of the giant markets, where any type is a dime a… Read more »

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

“I’m at this point where I’m probably as good looking as I’ll get. It really seems like a big waste of time “pumping iron” in order to get the perfect physique.” Don’t pump iron to get the perfect physique. Pump iron to get strong, because strength is useful and weakness is not a virtue. Fragility outright sucks. And there’s no such thing as the perfect physique anyway, only a variety of optimizations for a variety of purposes within a framework that is out of your control, since picking your parents is problematic. And while it isn’t a pressing (as it… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
8 years ago

Okay. I’m gonna take an opportunity here to learn some things, and I’m asking for commenters assistance.

School an old(er) man please. : )

How do you define ” Status “?

How important is it to you to attain ” status ” on a scale from 1 to 10, with ten being a hardcore mover and shaker ( Steve Jobs type )?

How do you think females relate to status?

And finally, is Status something that is awarded or given, or is it something a man can self create – thereby having others recognize and acknowledge it?

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

“How do you define ” Status “?”

The regard in which other people hold you. Note that that definition is neutral.

“How do you think females relate to status?”

They want it. Preferably they want to be held in high regard, but if they can’t get that, they have no problem with infamy either.

” . . . is Status something that is awarded or given, or is it something a man can self create – thereby having others recognize and acknowledge it?”

Yes.

Murray Street
Murray Street
8 years ago

Jesus, I don’t know that i have the guts for this. Check out James Marshall getting blown out time after time in NY. I like watching videos of PUAs getting blown out. All the best usually have one or two. Julien, Tyler, Honest Signalz, Cupid… Two reasons. First it helps you keep in mind that rejection is going to happen and it’s normal. Even the pros get it, your approach didn’t fail because you are an exceptionally out of touch individual or some shit. Second, and most important, it shows you that once you’re on some level even your rejections… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Rugby – Have you read E. O. Wilson’s The Social Conquest of Earth? It’s absolutely fascinating. I’m on my second time through and I still struggle to get some of it.

Is This Thing On?
Is This Thing On?
8 years ago

I’ve got loads of respect for this site. I’ve learned more here than at any other place in the manosphere. One thing that has always bothered me a little though is the somewhat contemptuous attitude of the MRA portion of the manosphere. Granted, a lot of whining goes on in those circles, but the post about James Deen and the rape allegations against him point to the value of the MRAs. There is also a high school kid who has already spent over a year in jail because of mass allegations from school mates that he gamed. His attorneys have… Read more »

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

“I simply think it will be too dangerous for young men to even play the game.”

Under conditions such as that, young men have been known to become dangerous.

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Murray – I guess I meant at 53 game looks like a steep mountain to climb. I approach fearlessly and can get dialog going. I’m actually not crazy about Marshall’s technique. I find the direct thing he does is a bit of a cop out, like he’s getting the attraction stuff out of the way up front to give her an out. Contrast with Julien – “I can tell, you love to party!” Assume the value, don’t beg for it. I mean, when you approach a woman, it’s assumed that you find her attractive. I think this is a crutch… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Is – I don’t know about the Deen stuff. While I agree that false rape allegations etc are a problem, read carefully what he says. He admits to “being an asshole” when he was younger and apologizes to anyone he’s harmed several times in the piece. He also clearly gets off on dominance, and it seems not improbable to me that he may have gotten carried away with some women. Otherwise, why does he take that approach? He does offer some specific denials but the comments about his first GF seem to almost be an admission of guilt. Again, not… Read more »

enrique
enrique
8 years ago

@Wildman: I think your post is the most accurate picture of the future (as in soon). We are heading to a zero cost margin market on many things, and a deeper personalization of market options, despite our public/social faces, people will continue to retreat into their own “virtual” world, which will be unstoppable, when it comes to everything from holograms to sexbots to VR sex. I expect eventually 3D printers will allow someone to literally “Weird Science” their own chick. Rollo is right on his instincts of open hypergamy/cuckholdedry, but I think Wildman is right in that we will literally… Read more »

Is This Thing On?
Is This Thing On?
8 years ago

What I got from the article was that many of the allegations are actually from the set of porn shoots, specifically from kink.com. That’s a whole world I’m not really familiar with, but it would seem like judging that stuff by what I would call normal standards would be an error. I’m looking for a link to the high school kid story for more details, but some of the messages illustrated the girls where absolutely gleeful at the possibility of putting this guy in jail. I think it is fair to say that the guy was a jerk. That being… Read more »

enrique
enrique
8 years ago

scribblerg, the accusations against Deen (unlike the Cosby ones that were real) will follow the usual Salem Witch Trial steps. Everyone should read that account–they got bizarre with each new claim–now we are hearing of coke bottles up her ass and blood everywhere and all that. It will eventually be that he fucked her with a lawn mower, but the asshole DIDNT STOP when she used her “Safe word” which apparently was a “firm ‘no'” from what I am reading. This shit involves high end SJW porn maggots so really it will work itself out. Zero Fucks should be given.… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Is – That’s just not factually correct. There are allegations beyond the Kink place, but I agree that the complaints related to that place of course seem like BS. But that is by no means the extent of the complaints. And again, let me be very precise – I’m not saying he’s guilty. I’m just evaluating his own statements and as I said, it doesn’t scream innocence to me, hence I’m not going to flack for him as some kind of victim. Again, if he didn’t do anything, why is he callng himself an asshole when he was younger and… Read more »

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

@Andy and Asdgamer Andy said: “Meh, chatting online is easy. My in-person skills are lacking when I first meet a person. I think it’s mostly because I haven’t mastered the skill of making the conversation interesting to me yet so I’m just not that engaging or funny, then I just kind of get bored, long pauses, etc.” AsdGamer said:” I’ve always tried to ask open-ended questions to get women talking about their favorite subjects–themselves. If you can do that, they’ll think that you’re a brilliant conversationalist. The emotional component is very important. Asking girls about past pets that they loved… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Enrique – You don’t have your facts straight on the Cosby stuff. They are much less believable due to the vast time that elapsed and also the nature of the claims. I shared this on another thread, about the drugs used which are crucial part of the claims made against him.. They girls are making it sound like he roofied them but in fact they were quaaludes. I’m old enough to remember when people popped ludes like candy and I can tell you that taking a lude is nothing like a roofie. You are lucid and aware of what you… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

I meant to say “lude” instead of “roofie” above in the third sentence from the end of the first paragraph, ooops.

Murray Street
Murray Street
8 years ago

@scribblerg Of course his interactions here don’t work. It’s a compilation of rejections. In all his other videos you can see him clean up. I don’t get your point though, are you saying direct isn’t the ideal style of approach to you? Because I think there’s never any reason to go indirect unless there’s a situational context that allows it (meaning, something just happened and you can comment on it as an opener and maintain a conversation out of self-amusement), otherwise it’s weak because it’s dishonest. And girls probably can’t count the amount of times they’ve been approached under some… Read more »

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

@Averagechump “With that last paragraph in mind, the method of being “present to the moment” is something I hear a lot. Once again, in theory it sounds great and fantastic (you don’t have to think about anything! Just be present man!), but in practice it sounds like a bunch of poetic wording with no accordance with reality. How the fuck are you supposed to not think about stressful shit from your past or in your future? Anyway, that’s my take on it so far, but I still try it regardless.” @Striver “I can see the points about frame/game. But what… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Murray – I thought I made it pretty clear why I don’t like the “I thought you were attractive so I figured I’d say hi”. To me that’s implied by an approach. That is unless you are using a trick approach like asking for the time or something. He’s waiting for the girl to react to his value, but what Julien does is assume the value and immediately go for the emotional spike. He’s not asking for permission to approach and go further whereas Marshall seems to be asking permission to proceed when he does that. It works in some… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

– Way to slam-dunk it. I know what I’m doing with approach very well now so I can do it without thinking. But the rest is still WIP for me. But the W is the most important part of that phrase (Work in Progress). I’m out with the wing tomorrow night, more to come.

enrique
enrique
8 years ago

You may be right on the drugs Cosby used. I tend to believe he gave them to some (who wanted them), used them on others, and some of the other chicks are just making shit up because they went to dinner with him in 1983 or something and recall that they told someone back then he made a pass. They get to do the victim photo together with all the old hags on the seats in some kind of “statement” or whatever. Similar to the Deen thing, look, this is all SJW-inflicted gamesmanship between different sets of special snowflakes, seeing… Read more »

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

@ScribblerG

One thing I notice about your approach as well as various other commenters including Forge, Blaximus, AsdGamer and myself is honesty with one’s self about their weaknesses and the ability and desire to do work-in-progress without the Buffers (Rollo’s link above) that prevent real work getting done.

immoralgables
8 years ago

@Scray

Yo dude!

Can you expend (as much as you’re able to) on how you built up your niche in the club scene? You commented in a “Don’t Hate the Beta” post that you’d be able to share some details on that. I’m in a big city right now and just got my job situation handles so I’m in a spot right now where I can and want to get this area of my life handled.

Only reveal what you’re comfortable with, if anything I get inspired from reading your shit.

Glad to hear you’re doing well

Water Cannon Boy
Water Cannon Boy
8 years ago

from Hoellenhund2 4. Being a prostitute means that you have to have sex with sexually unattractive men. In the eyes of the average Western woman, this is a fate so horrible it cannot be expressed with words. And this idea will take even deeper roots as institutionalized feminism gains an ever tighter grip on mainstream discourse and the education system.

You underestimate what women will do when money is envolved.

Col Trautman
Col Trautman
8 years ago

Re; Brad Pitt video,

Brad is the most dedicated follower that I’ve ever seen. He takes on the dress, behavior, interests, vibe of all of his girlfriends. Textbook Beta.

Re; The James Marshall vids;
Well good luck to him but he seems so supplicating to me. Seems to be the antithesis of what others teach.

rugby11
8 years ago
Reply to  Col Trautman

@kfg “Under conditions such as that, young men have been known to become dangerous.” https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pgL4IvoR7tw @SJF “honesty with one’s self about their weaknesses and the ability and desire to do work-in-progress without the Buffers (Rollo’s link above) that prevent real work getting done.” Right with you @Water canon boy “You underestimate what women will do when money is envolved.” Sex industry (Top porn productions give off this very vibe) http://lawrencewalters.com/ @Rollo Tommassi https://www.afsp.org/content/download/13514/228430/file/Suicide%202015%20Facts%20and%20Figures.pdf Field report Meet a 19 doc student by the train today cold approached and got a lot of practice helped her with her 6 page poetry paper… Read more »

IAS
IAS
8 years ago

@SJF: can you give me some of your own examples on eliciting value? I had read that post by Rollo already. I want to try it out this week on a social event. More on breadcrumbs for example: I’m thinking it would be like saying “I enjoy a bunch of sports” without saying which ones, so that she picks it up and eventually asks me about it (and makes the connection that I’m physically active). Is that a good example? Or is even starting there too explicit and I would be better starting out even more vague like “I have… Read more »

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Hollen – Women have sex with men they aren’t attracted to all the time – that’s what Beta, married guys have to live with. That deadfish, compliance sex. That “don’t cum in my mouth”, “don’t put your finger there”, “ow, that hurts, your pushing too hard”, “I just can’t cum that way” kind of sex, yes? I will tell you this – I’ve had better sex with a prostitute than I did with my ex-wife after 2 hrs of begging and pleading (it didn’t start out that way). I remember when I took my sanity back in my marriage, I… Read more »

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

@IAS An example of eliciting values: HB7 33 y.o. bartendress by night and landscaper by day (family business) with two college undergraduate degrees. (5’9″ lean muscular body with a 34 1/4″ leg inseam). “Tell me, Long Legs, when you are out doing landscaping work, what is the most enjoyable part of that work? What one part of that job do you really enjoy?” Her:”I really enjoy laying sod. I get it just perfectly laid down, and then it grows lush and green and it is wonderful” Me: “I get it. You are bringing life and beauty where there was none… Read more »

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

“I’ve always tried to ask open-ended questions to get women talking about their favorite subjects–themselves.”

@asd

Yeah, I’m having trouble getting past superficial stuff. Where I live people are really guarded about getting to know people, and if you’re too friendly they think you have mental problems. It seems like when I travel people open up much easier… Maybe that’s just my imagination… I’m reading Mystery Method, so hopefully that’ll help.

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

Re: Breadcrumbs – This is something I do automatically with women now as a result of the Red Pill without thinking about it. They ask what I do, I tell them “As little as possible for as much money as I can get” or “I have my own business.” Funnily, when I do explain “I help people start SaaS/Cloud companies”, many don’t even understand what I’m talking about. When establishing rapport, open ended questions are great but don’t rely on them too much. Women want a story, they want to be titillated (one wonders about the origin of the word,… Read more »

theasdgamer
8 years ago

@ andy

Start off by calibrating the girl’s emotions. And start with an innocuous subject like the weather and current cultural events in town. Then add a little humor. If a girl is laughing, she won’t be as guarded and will want to play in her emotions.

Always be calibrating.

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Andy – You might be better off with something like “How to win friends and influence people” the Dale Carnegie book. Some of it is Blue Pill, but some of it is gold. http://www.yourcoach.be/blog/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Dale-Carnegie-How-to-win-friends-and-influence-people.pdf And of course the “people aren’t friendly where I live” stuff is horseshit, or better said, is no obstacle to a socially intelligent man. Fyi, what they are really doing is refusing to give you status because you aren’t demonstrating enough social value. And, with respect, I imagine you telegraph that you really don’t like people. It comes through here 5 over 5 buddy, truly. The… Read more »

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

“with a 34 1/4″ leg inseam”

wtf? lol.

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

“The world-weary, cynical shit – nobody wants to be social with a misanthrope.”

Yeah, I definitely WAS like that, I feel like I’m getting better though.

mersonia
8 years ago

@andy

Go read Jugglers Method.

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

From: Practical Female Psychology: For the Practical Man Kindle Edition by Joseph South (Author), David Clare (Author), Franco (Author Eliciting Values Understanding a woman’s value structure is critical for evaluating the potential for a successful relationship. Eliciting values (EV) is a very useful tool that we can borrow from the field of neurolinguistic programming (NLP). The idea behind EV is to find out what is important to a woman, and what she desires in life and in her relationships. The correct way to elicit a woman’s values is to get her to talk about herself and her past relationships freely.… Read more »

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

@mersonia

Yeah, yaReally recommended that for me a while back, and it just wasn’t clicking. I’ll give it another go.

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

“with a 34 1/4″ leg inseam”

wtf? lol.

I had seen her profile in an college write-up for her sport (google searched her name). I asked her if she was 5’9″ or 5’10”. Talked about her lean athletic body. She volunteered information about her leg inseam. How cool is that? Did we mention that women like to talk about themselves? (She has a beautiful ass)

Is This Thing On?
Is This Thing On?
8 years ago
SJF
SJF
8 years ago

More from the Joseph South book along the lines of how ScribblerG screens the women. (This is a little disjointed and out of context, and the Double Bind is poorly explained, but it gets a few ideas out there) Compliance Once you are able to control the frame, you will quickly discover that LSE women are incapable of following you as the leader of the relationship, no matter how self-assured and in control of yourself you are. On the other hand, HSE women will find it much easier to admire and respect a man who displays such leadership qualities. The… Read more »

Andy
Andy
8 years ago

Gah! I need to go take a shower.

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

Hum this as you walk up and talk to her: ….What I wouldn’t give to find a soulmate Someone else to catch this drift And what I wouldn’t give to meet a kindred Enough about me, let’s talk about you for a minute Enough about you, let’s talk about life for a while The conflicts, the craziness and the sound of pretenses Falling all around…all around Why are you so petrified of silence Here can you handle this? Did you think about your bills, your ex, your deadlines Or when you think you’re gonna die Or did you long for… Read more »

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

@Andy

“Gah! I need to go take a shower.”

What? It’s just from naturally flowing conversation with a beautiful woman.

mersonia
8 years ago

Often as I read your comments I wonder if you guys come off as queer in person as you do online.

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@Mersonia – My guess is that that SJF never thinks about you at all…
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QSICYVGcGA4&w=560&h=315%5D

theasdgamer
8 years ago

Get them talking about their family or TV shows they like or their friends or a trip they took. This gets them into an emotional state much more quickly. I tried the family thing with one broad. She has no connections with her family. I don’t understand why thinking about a trip would get a woman into an emotional state. One thing I’m gonna try. Me: So, who is the hottest man for you–which athlete, musician, movie star, or politician? She: xxx Me: If you and he were the only two people in the world, and you two were so… Read more »

SJF
SJF
8 years ago

ScribblerG is correct.

scribblerg
scribblerg
8 years ago

@ASD – Typical. When I find a woman with no connections with her family I run. It’s a signal about her values and personality. These are core relationships and how a woman sees them reveals quite a bit. Example: A well known Twitter feminist and the subject of GamerGate, Brianna Wu, when asked about her family (who gave her 200k to start her business over 10 years ago), stated, “I haven’t talked to my family in a decade”. Nice shortcut to the truth about her. You might have asked that woman, “Why is that?” or even said “That’s weird”. It’s… Read more »

rugby11
8 years ago
Reply to  scribblerg

@Andy
http://m4ker.free.fr/PUA/Essential%20Seduction/%5BJuggler%5D_The_Juggler_Method_Encyclopedia_(Second_Edition).pdf

Self surgery
Went out to a bunch of new dances going to another this evening. I’ve broken a lot of habits that didn’t help thanks to journaling extensively and learning from everyone here. I dot know how much worse off I would be if this place wasn’t a positive feedback of growth and constant self challenge for the betterment of myself.

enrique
enrique
8 years ago

@scribblerg Some of the healthiest people I know, are folks who cut off their family or had nothing else to do with them, once they became an adult. I’m one of them and I have over the years, met dozens of others, male and female who decided to be done with their screwed up family and move on with life. I get your example, of the Wu chick, but a lack of family connection should be investigated a bit further–sometimes it’s the trait of a sound mind. Lots of mothers , especially, have done head-jobs on their kids and were… Read more »

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