The Myth of Sexual Peak

The following is a re-blog from the archives of the (unfortunately) defunct aggregate blog The Spearhead. I want to archive this on my own blog because I think it was a fantastic exposé for its time and Chuck Ross deserves props for it too.



by CHUCK ROSS on NOVEMBER 16, 2009

A common myth is that men hit their sexual peak at the age of 18 while women hit theirs at 30-35. Despite literally no scientific support for this theory, this meme has become “common knowledge” in our society.

The myth never sat well with me. And to be clear, this myth is no straw-man concocted by this writer. It has entrenched itself in our culture to the point that most believe it is true without considering the implications or reasons for such an illogical development.

“Well we all know…” is a precursor heard before recitation of the myth. I worked with three 30-something women as a bank teller. Their excuse for their child-like antics, raunchy sex-talk, and monthly vibrator parties was that they were at their sexual peak. They said it as if they had a moral obligation to live up to their billing as sex-crazed mynx. While I’m not proud of it, when I was 20 or 21 I had a year-long sexual relationship with a 30 year-old woman whose fiance couldn’t keep up with her horniness. She justified her behavior by saying she was at her sexual peak and had a right to satiate her hunger. I got into an argument the other day with a female Bulgarian friend of mine who off-handedly recited this meme. The myth has infiltrated the Eastern bloc. I’ve had many encounters with the myth; I’m sure most readers have too.

I’ve never understood why our creator – natural selection – would put men and women at their sexual peaks at such different points in their lives. More importantly, why would women be at their peaks and more horny when they were less fertile? Every thing we know about evolution and sexual behavior indicates that natural selection has made it easy peasy for our genes to be passed on through sexual reproduction – why throw a wrench in the system by making horniness levels – or “desire to copulate” levels – incongruent between the sexes and less conducive to reproduction? Since women are most fertile from the ages of 20-24, it would make sense that they would desire sex more than when they were a decade older and half as fertile.

Those purveyors of the myth don’t account for Dr. David Schnarch’s dichotomy between genital prime and sexual prime. As spouted by the masses, the myth advocates the notion that these women want sex more rather than the more plausible argument that they are more experienced and comfortable with sex. If the myth is fully perpetuated, it grants 30-something women sexual liberation while offering nothing to men of the same age.

From Dr. Schnarch’s book Passionate marriage:

“Most textbooks on human sexuality, adolescent development, and family life teach that men reach their sexual prime before they even hit their twenties. Women supposedly reach their prime several years later…and therein lies our problem. Health-care providers make the same mistake as the rest of us: We’ve confused genital prime with sexual prime.

Genital prime occurs when a person has fully developed sexual organs and are most fertile. This occurs during adolescence and shortly after for both men and women. The myth holds men to the genital prime model while holding women to the other; it doesn’t compare apples to apples. This has the effect of making 30-something female sex some sort of animalistic expression rather than a more mature concept of sex that men of the same age achieve. The widely-accepted meme of late female sexual peak is a false dichotomy.

So why has this meme succeeded in entrenching itself so deeply in our collective mythology? First, it prevents us from being able to call 30-something sexually-peaking women sluts. Saying that a 30-something woman is at her peak is a PC way of saying she’s a slut. But given that “slut” implies something bad (and we know that a woman doing what she wants with her body can never be bad) those myth-sustainers prefer to say she is peaking. A peak implies something grandiose and wonderful. Peaks are achievements of milestones deserving rewards and ticker-tape parades. When the sexual prime myth is used to encourage and support these womens’ shady sexual behavior, it violates Schnarch’s dichotomy. Myth-purveyors seek to use the genital peak behavior of men at the age of 18 to condone womens’ slutiness at later ages by citing the need for equality of opportunity to express sexuality.

Second, older women HATE HATE HATE younger women. Sex is power. Younger women have held it in spades over their elders. Being that everyone desires to wrench power out of the hands of people who hold it, older women and those soon to be of that demographic have an incentive to glamorize the twilight years.

Says sex and relationship expert Pepper Schwartz:

“The bottom line for me: The evolution of the cougar concept is good for every woman and her partner. It keeps sexual possibilities and eroticism alive. And that continued capacity for passion creates lifelong desirability to younger men, older men, or anyone who can recognize a vital spirit when meeting one.”

The myth has sustained because it gives women hope as they venture into the twilight of their ability to be incubators of seed and the commensurate degradation of their looks. Sex is power, and attaching that power to women of ever-increasing ages allows women to hang on to it longer. Older women have declared war on younger women. Through wishful thinking they seek to destroy every benefit and short cut that younger, prettier women have even though they benefited from the same attitudes at an earlier point in their lives. We see this by observing the attitudes towards female celebrities who act in sexual ways. When Madonna was younger, she was considered a slut. Her book Sex was considered raunchy and disgusting. Now that she’s old and in her “sexual prime” she is given a free pass to perform in sexually-suggestive ways. Her behavior today, while not as risque as that when she was younger, is lauded as empowering and even artistic.

Young starlets are hazed by a certain segment of the population for capitalizing on their sexiness, but that same segment glorifies Demi Moore, Susan Sarandon, Madonna, Cher, Jennifer Aniston, and Halle Berry for rocking it at older ages.

We can easily see that the sexual peak meme is widely touted for the empowerment it gives to older women. Rather than being a quirky feature of our sexuality, the myth that 35 year-old women are on the same level as 18 year-old boys attempts to allow women to hold more leverage over men. As feminism achieves its goal of female economic empowerment, we begin to observe “peak inflation”. The peak shifts upward as women delay marriage and children and seek to have fun of the sexual variety at increasing ages. Cougars are a case in point. These women are over 40. Even though the myth hasn’t explicitly increased the age range of women at their peak, the cougar phenomenon idolizes women’s sexual power at these late ages and glorifies their sexuality as empowering.

You see, the sexuality-as-power lobby wants to shift the reins of control from men to women and from younger women to older ones. Younger women are fulfilling their biological imperative thereby submitting themselves to men or to a scheme that plays into men’s strategies. Older women expressing their sexuality is a way for them to hold sway over the purse strings to power. They are having sex on their own terms rather than due to some ingrained chore or obligation. The sex peak myth is a catalyst for creating sexual autonomy.

In terms of species propagation, men and women are most horny whenever they are most fertile; their genital peak occurs at a young age. Both men and women reach their “sexual peak” – their mental maturity – at later ages. The key here is that each maturity occurs at similar ages for both sexes; the myth loses its power when we realize this. The first maturity is biological while the second is social. The myth of the late female peak says that women are hornier in their thirties by trying to equate the 30 year old’s behaviors and urges to that of an 18 year old man. This is simply a perversion of Dr. Schnarch’s dichotomy. Both sexes have had many years of sexual experience and they have had more time to rid themselves of debilitating sexual hang-ups and phobias. They aren’t hornier at later ages, they’re just more relaxed with the ideas of sexuality and have thus reached “sexual prime”. The late sexual prime myth is a convenient tool that excuses perverse sexual behavior in older women. Sex is power, and it is used as a weapon to pry control from those that have traditionally held it; men and young, beautiful women. By ratcheting up the expectations of older females’ sexual inhibition, they wrangle pawns to line their battlefield.


While I feel this is one of the better outlines of the Myth  of Sexual Peak, there’s a few thing I think Bob didn’t touch upon. What prompted me to dig this article up from Wayback Machine was a Twitter exchange I had about the recent New York Times article outlining a study on the ages of peak desirability for men and women. This article raised the hackles of online women in precisely the same way that this myth has always triggered women. The Myth of Sexual peak for women is a social convention that refuses to die since it was created in the free-love era to now. Even Bob’s piece here is almost a decade old. And yet, in spite of the statistical evidence that damns the myth, the next generation of women don’t even realize they are parroting back the same tropes their mothers did in their day.

Michelle Drouin, a developmental psychologist who focuses on technology and relationships, was not surprised by the new study — in part because they “align with evolutionary theories of mating” in which youth suggests fertility, she said.

Dr. Drouin pointed out, though, that there are also theories that suggest that “men are just less interested in earning potential or power, and more interested in physical attractiveness.”

When I first published my now infamous SMV Graph in 2012 I took a lot of heat for allegedly not being thorough enough in my  estimation process. Honesty and hindsight, I was a lot more intuitive than informational then, but I knew I had it right; at least from the visceral physicality of it from an evolutionary perspective. Since 2012, I’ve had study after study and correlation after correlation sent to me by readers, or simply fall into my lap, that corroborated the bell graphs, time lines and circumstances I had a basic inkling of. While I think that women peaking at 18 and men peaking at 50, as per this study, might be somewhat exaggerated for outrageousness, it still, once again, confirms the basic form I set out in my original graph.

One issue I think Bob didn’t touch upon is the evolutionary logistics of why this myth is timed conveniently at the stage in life that women’s sexual market value (SMV) is in decline. He’s correct about about older women wanting to compete with younger women, but there’s a hindbrain understanding that women’s only real agency in this life is their sexuality. The Myth of Sexual Peak is a tool in this competition, but it is squarely directed at shaming men for their evolved preference for youth and fertility in women. In a raw, evolutionary reality, men only really need women to reproduce, thus, the most desirable age for this in women stays relatively the same. Conversely, women need men with different qualities for different, and opportunistic, reasons at various stages of their lives and how their necessity dictates. Thus, women can find men desirable to fulfill those purposes at ages from 15-50. And before you give me a ration of shit about including 15 year old boys in that mix I’ll point you to the rash of mid twenties female teachers on trial for banging their high school students.

All women (yes, all) have an innate understanding of their sexual agency, and all understand its perishable nature. However, there’s a trade-off inherent in balancing this agency with optimizing Hypergamy. The longer a woman waits the more that agency declines, but the longer she has to consolidate on a man (or men) who represents her Hypergamous ideal. The reason the social convention of women’s “sexual peak” is set at the age of 30-35 is because it attempts to create an artificial sexual value for men. It pretends that their later age makes them better sexual experiences than women 22-24 years old. It’s a disqualification of those women for men’s long term provisioning considerations, but it also plays on male-shame while simultaneously (artificially) inflating women’s self-image. This is why the myth is so pervasive – it satisfies a lot of insecurities. It’s ’empowering’ for women to believe that men are too infantile to appreciate the better sexual experience they believe they represent.

Furthermore, it’s difficult to argue against because it seems plausible and it’s almost entirely based on how women feel about themselves sexually. What a tragic joke that evolution should make women’s sexual peak occur when she least able to make it work for her, right? Wrong. In fact it’s comical when you see how a study that finds women’s peak age of desirability is 18 and mens should be 50 – almost the inverse of what the myth wants us to believe; that 18 year old men and 30 year old women are at their sexual peaks.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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kfg
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kfg

“Thank you for reversing the order of comments. It is more convenient for those who want to post without reading or scrolling through those previous.”

OK, I can see that point. It doesn’t work for me, but I can see it.

theasdgamer
Guest

Genital prime occurs when a person has fully developed sexual organs and are most fertile. This occurs during adolescence and shortly after for both men and women. Unfortunately, biology doesn’t support this statement. For one thing, many women don’t ovulate regularly until their mid teens… This is the final stage of development. Full height is reached, and young women are ovulating regularly. https://www.quora.com/What-are-the-stages-of-puberty Furthermore, sexual pleasure increases for women as their clitoris grows until it reaches its max size when she reaches menopause. The clitoris actually grows during a woman’s lifetime. No, it isn’t getting stretched out from too much… Read more »

Not Born This Morning
Guest

DoS attacks against us mean two things of significant importance. First, it means we are triumphant. Why else the attacks? Second, DoS in all her insanity and extreme delusional bizzare manifestation of herself is on par with the FI. DoS effectively shares the same insane paradigm. They are “sisters”. DoS effectively illuminates the FI for what it really is by attacking us for exposing the FI and manifesting its allegiance with the FI. Why else the attacks? The darkness cannot cover the light. Light penetrates the darkness and the darkness has no choice. So do not be offended and look… Read more »

EhIntellect
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EhIntellect

“Prepare the stake. Light the flame.”

That’s the spirit!

Goodnight!

Orson
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Orson

@Not Born This Morning “Men need to wake up and realize the awesome power of their ability to control who receives their seed and when and under what conditions. “It’s my way on my terms bitch, or no seed.” This is the only effective way for men to regain control of their lives with women. I predict that this is where we are headed, because men have no other options as effective.” This is major cope and delusion from the purple/red pill/MGTOW/MRA tribes. The cats are out of the bag and that means that the unrestrained female desire cannot be… Read more »

lossywail
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lossywail

Those experienced will always know the younger are easier to satisfy, moan louder, more submissive and enjoy sex far greater. The older groups in their 30s are just sluttier and easier.

palmasailor
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palmasailor

@Orson “It’s my way on my terms bitch, or no seed.” Most men are waaaaay too thirsty for this and so are not in control of who/what receives their seed. If you actually decline a woman sex and discuss it in a group of men in the pub for instance the majority of them will spit their beer out in disbelief, call you out on being gay or a bullshitter. Most men will fuck absolutely anything. We’re only just getting to the stage where a lot of western women really are so gross that they are truly unfuckable. Even if… Read more »

SJF
Guest

So, Orson, what do you think about the Red Pill being a bottoms up approach? You be aware of what all is going on here. You develop your own strategy. You develop your agency, your power, your ability to operated in this venue. So what you are saying is that it doesn’t work efficiently in a Top Down approach to changing the paradigm. So go with that. And try to prove that correct. You do you. Don’t expect the collective of other men in the world to carry the water for you. (But, meanwhile, don’t hesitate to have your own… Read more »

name?!
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name?!

@O.B.I.T. What sets women on a path or the other? Isn’t it obvious? It’s not like approaching 30 the former impulses disappear. It’s like… for a certain class of women (defined by not great attractiveness and limited narcissism, among other things) the former impulses are subdued by social/practical anxiety and fear, so they “settle”. If the genuine instinctual impulses are stronger than the drive to grab resources the easiest way & social status as determined in a still traditionalist way, + narcissism is unlimited instead of limited, she will not “settle”. It’s 2 competing currents, which are there always —… Read more »

name?!
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name?!

@Orson Nothing it’s in man’s terms, he has zero control on the lives of women. She has sperm banks and can conceive through a pump and dump with some alpha guy and then find suckers to raise children of another man. You say men have no power, then just a line below you say they have. They have the power to be so attractive that the woman’s impulse to couple with him overpowers the anti-man cultural programming she’s subject to every hour every day from a 360-degree ample media circle. They have the power to be suckers who pay the… Read more »

theasdgamer
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If the genuine instinctual impulses are stronger than the drive to grab resources

Both AF and BB are instinctual. Women can be trained to behave honorably and ethically in order to put these impulses to honorable use. This training used to be done by the mother and father. However, honor and ethics aren’t held in high esteem currently, so there are very few adults around to do the training. It’s up to Red Pill men to establish this training in their own households, if they choose to do so.

name?!
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name?!

@palmasailor

That’s PRECISELY what — with the decisive aid of the neuro-programmers hired by the élite who govern, of course — has turned men into a class of serfs with minor or no rights.
That’s it. You can see it.
Men want sex much more than women, and will abnegate their dignity, flatter and subserve, to quench their need, thus inflating narcissism and arrogance — with the abovesaid aid, of course — and making dignity a most costly choice for the men not happy to resign their own.

name?!
Guest
name?!

@theasdgamer It’s up to Red Pill men to establish this training in their own households, if they choose to do so. You have to be a heck of a mind-hacker to rival, alone, the non-stop 360-degree mind hacking of media + education + state bureaucracy. You may be the 1/100 man and find the 1/500 woman, but if we speak of where we are headed, as a society, it’s clear. The élite want to abolish family because family is a political unit, and larger political units gain power if they undo the smaller ones. Then they ally with the worst… Read more »

EhIntellect
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EhIntellect

“She has sperm banks and can conceive through a pump and dump with some alpha guy and then find suckers to raise children of another man.” Comments like this one are much too broad and hyperbolic to be applicable. They sound great as, with a facile and self-righteous flair, point at some RP trees but not the forest. They intimate a man’s psychical anxiety more than anything externally threatening. By definition an Alpha guy is selective. The sperm bank women aren’t Alpha game. Have you seen them…up close? I have. These women don’t have that much latitude to do whatever,… Read more »

O.B.I.T.
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O.B.I.T.

The feds are ready to test a male contraceptive, a gel that you would spread on your upper back to temporarily cut sperm production.

The unnamed reporter (Blooomberg service by way of Drudge) says this could help men “share the burden” of contraception. He/she doesn’t seem to grasp that this could give men more agency, not more burden

Anonymous Reader
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Anonymous Reader

Palmasailor Most men will fuck absolutely anything. Or at least they’ll try. I’m amazed at the number of fat gold-diggers that seem to always have a beta orbiter or three around them. Unpleasant, often foul mouthed, yet there’s some doofus willing to “m’lady” them. We’re only just getting to the stage where a lot of western women really are so gross that they are truly unfuckable. Yep. Orson’s kidding himself about that “withholding seed” idea, it will only work for men perceived as Apha, and most of them are already picking and choosing their women. Your perspective on sexbots makes… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Guest
Anonymous Reader

O.B.I.T.
The feds are ready to test a male contraceptive, a gel that you would spread on your upper back to temporarily cut sperm production.

Seems pretty dumb to me, given what’s involved in spermogenesis. Guess I’ll have to go search on it in order to have an informed opinion.

No one has ever explained why a “male pill” would be a game changer. I suspect those who think it would be are purple pill at best.

O.B.I.T.
Guest
O.B.I.T.
CFGauss
Guest
CFGauss

“Women in a certain demographic are already screaming for men. 40+ year old career women are realising they’re gonna have to slog it out for 25 more years ina shit job they hate. The demographic of men that would have wife’d them up (me) are just not playing by those rules anymore.” To your point Palma… https://www.mamamia.com.au/should-i-have-a-baby/ “I focused on being the best person I could be. I focused on having a full life, trying new things, going out, getting drunk, casual sex, unrequited love, intense friendships, traveling, living overseas, and exploring.” “Still, I didn’t worry about getting married or… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Guest
Anonymous Reader

O.B.I.T. Here’s what I saw. The reporter is female, btw Thanks for the link. The reporter’s sex is not relevant. The concept is….questionable. Here is the press release from the Feds: https://www.nih.gov/news-events/news-releases/nih-evaluate-effectiveness-male-contraceptive-skin-gel The gel formulation, called NES/T, includes the progestin compound segesterone acetate (brand name Nestorone), in combination with testosterone. It is applied to the back and shoulders and absorbed through the skin. The progestin blocks natural testosterone production in the testes, reducing sperm production to low or nonexistent levels. The replacement testosterone maintains normal sex drive and other functions that are dependent on adequate blood levels of the hormone.… Read more »

j
Guest
j

@CFGauss Its not that nobody wants to impregnate this 38 year old post wall slut and start a family with her. Its that no High Value male wants to do so. Which this delusional cunt still feels entitled to. She needs to come to terms with the fact that she’s gonna have to gonna have to settle for Mr. ehh or else kiss your “lifelong dream” goodbye. Because someone WILL man up and marry these sloots (i.e. men who don’t read TRM). If you want to see a recent hilarious (kinda sad) example of how absolutely delusional these post wall… Read more »

Agent P
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Agent P

So I guess J is still in the anger phase.

Not Born This Morning
Guest

@Orson You missed the point, or maybe not, maybe you can’t take control. Maybe you don’t want to take control. Maybe you have nothing that enables you to take control. “Purple pill MGTOW” is not the same thing as taking control of yourself and control of what you have that others want. Unless you have nothing anyone desires, the concept would be simple to you, readily accepted by you and easily applied, happily applied. Its just a simple matter of economics. Those who have the most buy the most or the best. Of course, if you have nothing women want,… Read more »

Not Born This Morning
Guest

“Most men will fuck absolutely anything. Or at least they’ll try. I’m amazed at the number of fat gold-diggers that seem to always have a beta orbiter or three around them. Unpleasant, often foul mouthed, yet there’s some doofus willing to “m’lady” them.” This is true… or has been to an extent. But, things are changing. “Beta” has become a nasty word of sorts. And this is a good thing. Most men do not want to be identified as beta, it is like a curse. It is shameful. Who wants to be known as a weakling door mat ignorant self… Read more »

Orson
Guest
Orson

@Not Born This Morning

Calling men to ” wake up and realize the awesome power of their ability to control who receives their seed and when and under what conditions.” is disingenuous.
It’s like urging the beggars of the city to go to the Mercedes dealership and brag to the salesman about how much in control they are of the 5 cents in their pocket resisting to buy any car.

ridiculous and pure delusion.

Not Born This Morning
Guest

@ Orson

“It’s like urging the beggars of the city to go to the Mercedes dealership and brag to the salesman about how much in control they are of the 5 cents in their pocket resisting to buy any car.

ridiculous and pure delusion.”

I wouldn’t know. I’m not a beggar. Tell us more about it.

Not Born This Morning
Guest

http://thefederalist.com/2018/11/26/mom-dresses-six-year-old-son-girl-threatens-dad-losing-son-disagreeing/

This will end up going the same way as lobotomies did in the 1930s.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lobotomy

It will lose its fashion appeal even among the most delusional as the effects of it are experienced. But something else will come along… God knows what. Species transition maybe? “Panspecies” “Cis-species”

palmasailor
Guest
palmasailor

@C F Gauss

“He would have financial stability, a house, and be ready to have a child with me. We would holiday together, laughing and enjoying life. I would get pregnant or we would foster children, and I would walk around our kitchen barefoot, baking cakes as music filled the house”

Yep that was me. And I even built that house myself.

As we speak my 15 year old son won’t even return my calls.

And they think I’ll do it again?

kfg
Guest
kfg
O.B.I.T.
Guest
O.B.I.T.

The international science community can tut-tut all they want, but genies do not willingly go back in the bottle. One day all the children in Lake Woebegone may REALLY be above average.

O.B,I.T.
Guest
O.B,I.T.

@AR
“The reporter’s sex is not relevant.”

Men and women communicate differently so it very often is relevant. Of course the lines can be blurred because you don’t know who is guiding and editing the reporter. Gender is even more important at that level.

In this case I just was curious because “burden” — the “burden” of contraception — is an awfully loaded word to use right off in a straight news report. Don’t women often characterize contraception as “empowering?”

Unfortunately there’s no gel you can rub on some journalists, male or female, to get a straight story.

Anonymous Reader
Guest
Anonymous Reader

kfg Here they come: Maybe. Good thing there’s nothing complex about the human genotype, no possible unforseen side effects, etc. from tinkering with knockouts like that. O.B.I.T. One day all the children in Lake Woebegone may REALLY be above average. Quick quiz: how many possible sites have been identified that affect intelligence, as of last month? HINT: It’s more than 3. This is not a trivial problem. O.B.I.T. @AR “The reporter’s sex is not relevant.” Men and women communicate differently so it very often is relevant Regardless of the communication style, the facts don’t change, and all I care about… Read more »

SJF
Guest

Geez Comment got eaten by WordPress. I was wondering why J. would laugh his ass off, figuratively, about make very little money. What’s the end game there? Is that DHV? Are you humble-bragging? What gives there? Whats the goal? What is your profession J. Don’t be shy. You get laid. You keep yourself in the Frame of pussy (not that there is anything wrong with that. We all do that.) But then what? So what you are saying is that you are happy and have release from constraint via La Petit Mort? Are you free? And do you feel power?… Read more »

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