Rites of Passage

aboriginal-passage

In the past I’ve discussed the hesitancy of young men to refer to themselves as ‘men’ or to really even embrace what might be considered a ‘conventional’ idea of masculinity. You’ve probably read me using that word before. I use the word conventional because I feel it conveys a better understanding of a naturalized expression of masculinity in a way that men evolved into. Occasionally I have a reader ask me why I don’t use the term ‘traditional’ with respect to masculinity, but I’m not sure they really mean the same thing.

It’s easy to think of masculinity in terms of tradition, but whose tradition are we really referring to? ‘Traditional Masculinity’ as a term has assumed a derogatory meaning in a feminine-primary social order. It’s become one of those catch-terms that we’re all supposed to understand as being characteristic of backward mindsets. It’s part of the social convention that seeks to ridicule, shame and confuse boys who later become men about what masculinity ought to mean to them. So, it’s for this reason I use the word ‘conventional’. It conveys the idea that masculinity in a binary sense has evolved aspects that are inherent and unique to men. So while certain cultures may have had different traditions and traditional roles for men, there is a unifying conventionality of masculinity that relates to all men and maleness in general.

Feminine-centrism doesn’t like this idea. It doesn’t like the idea that masculine characteristics or behaviors are the sole propriety of men. The reflex then is to paint any conventionally masculine attribute, way of thinking, aggression, passion or aspiration as either representative of ‘toxic’ harmful or anti-social, or, depending on its usefulness in securing power, it’s cast as something “not necessarily masculine” since some women can lay claim to that trait.

In several prior posts I’ve outlined how boys are taught from a very early age to gender-loathe their maleness. It’s part of Blue Pill conditioning, but more so, I think it’s important for Blue Pill or unplugging adult men to understand the mechanics and reasoning behind why it’s in the Feminine Imperative’s interests to keep conventional masculinity something ambiguous, arbitrary or something men ought to be able to fluidly define for themselves. That last part there is important, because what most men think is their own self-definition of masculinity is always founded in what the Feminine Imperative has conditioned him to believe is correct.

Latent Purposes

In a social order that’s ostensibly founded upon a baseline equalism (in principle) among men and women we have to look at why it might be necessary for boys to be taught that ‘traditional’ masculinity is toxic. The easy answer is a want for control, but not so much in the terms of convincing boys to become men who will loathe their maleness. Remember, there’s a lot of conventional masculinity that is conveniently useful to further the interests of women and Hypergamy – but the conditioning becomes one of selectively classifying the useful aspects as ‘healthy’ and the non-useful ones as ‘toxic’.

The most important thing to consider here is that, for future men, equalism’s purpose in their upbringing is to prevent them from ever internalizing the idea that they should be their own mental point of origin. This I think is one of the fundamental issues most Blue Pill men struggle with in their own unplugging.

One of the old books, traditional, understandings is that men, by virtue of being male, can expect a degree of authority in their lives and in their families. A man may not be the boss at work, but the traditional understanding was that he could expect to be the head of household in his own home. Feminine primacy, under the auspices of equalism, has effectively conditioned this idea out of men over the course of generations. If men and women are blank-slate functional equals, ideally, there will never be a default authority in an intersexual relationship.

From a conventional, evolutionary perspective we know this baseline equalism is not just false, but we also understand that it serves as a control over the masculine nature men are born into. Men and women are different; cognitively, neurologically, biologically and psychologically, but our socialized presumptions with regard to how boys are raised to be men deliberately conditions them to believe we are the same – or at least functionally so.

The Crime of Being Male

There’s been some pushback to this in our Red Pill awakening, and not all of it is the result of the manosphere. As Hypergamy becomes more openly embraced in a larger social respect, more men are made aware of their deliberate conditioning to accommodate it. What they choose to do with that awareness is up to them, but the response from the Feminine Imperative to this awareness is to criminalize or make toxic the embrace of conventional masculinity on the part of men. It becomes a hate-crime to express any conventionally male attribute.

This is a potential danger for Blue Pill men in that the expressions of maleness that they display are on one hand desired by women, but also a risk to their reputation or livelihood if that expression is offensive to women. Red Pill aware men may have the advantage of knowing women’s nature well enough to mitigate the risks, but Blue Pill men will be stuck in a paradigm that puts them at risk for wanting to be men.

Again, equalist Blue Pill conditioning’s purpose is to prevent men from assuming themselves as their mental point of origin, but once a man’s disabused himself of putting the feminine as his primary internal concern there must be an opposite, contingent, reaction on the part of the Feminine Imperative to put him back into compliance. Thus, we see the criminalization of maleness.

Pedestals

For some time it’s been a manosphere staple to tell guys to take the girl off the pedestal if he wants to be successful with women. We call it pedestalization, but one reason that dynamic, to put a woman on a higher order than oneself, is so pervasive in men is due exactly to this “equalist” conditioning. The internalization is one of making that girl, that woman, the centerpiece of a man’s headspace. This becomes who he is and it’s the result of a childhood that taught him he must place the concerns of girls above his own on many different psychological levels.

Once that guy becomes Red Pill aware, no matter who does his unplugging, not only does he remove girls from the pedestal personally, but also on a larger sociological scope. And this scope is what the Feminine Imperative must pushback against.

Blue Pill conditioning teaches boys/men to cast doubt on their own masculinity. What constitutes masculinity? Is it a mask or a performance they put on? Is it something to be proud of or some problem to keep in check? Should boys/men feel insecure or secure about it? These are the consistent ambiguities the Feminine Imperative wants to invest into the next generations of men because it keeps women on the pedestal. Only women possess the solution to their problem of maleness.

But the Blue Pill also conditions boys/men to never presume to consider themselves as a “man”. The joke is that men are never really men, but rather they become ‘bigger boys’. This is a social convention that attempts to keep men in a juvenilized state and thus ensuring women are the only ‘adults’ to make the judgement call. This ridicule has the purpose of denying men their status of ‘manhood’. If men are perpetual boys, they can never assume the default ‘headship’ of being men. It is a control for authority.

This is another reason men are conditioned to keep women on the pedestal; only women can confirm ‘manhood’ from a superior (mental) position in that man’s mind. When a woman is at the top of a man’s mental point of origin – and not even a specific woman, but womankind – she decides his status of being a man. So it follows that men ought to internalize the doubt of understanding manhood or conventional masculinity.

So, the struggle men have in coming to a Red Pill awareness is one of removing women from this pedestal, but also one of giving oneself permission to be a man. This may seem kind of simplistic, but to a guy who’s been conditioned to put women before himself in his own internal, mental, conversations it’s a very tough challenge. Blue Pill conditioning invests a doubt into boys and then men. They are conditioned to self-regulate on many levels, but to generally put their own concerns beneath those of others and largely the feminine. They are taught to self-sublimate by never giving themselves permission to be “men” in a conventional sense.

Iron Rule of Tomassi #9

Never Self-Deprecate under any circumstance. This is a Kiss of Death that you self-initiate and is the antithesis of the Prize Mentality. Once you’ve accepted yourself and presented yourself as a “complete douche” there’s no going back to confidence with a woman. Never appeal to a woman’s sympathies. Her sympathies are given by her own volition, never when they are begged for – women despise the obligation of sympathy. Nothing kills arousal like pity. Even if you don’t seriously consider yourself pathetic, it never serves your best interest to paint yourself as pathetic. Self-Depreciation is a misguided tool for the AFC, and not something that would even occur to an Alpha.

One important reason I made this an Iron Rule was because it’s almost a default response of men to presume their own ridiculousness. The reflexive response is of course to not take yourself so seriously and have an ability to laugh at yourself when it’s merited. That’s all fine and well, a necessity for a healthy sense of self, but few men realize their ease with self-deprecation is a result of their conditioning to find themselves ridiculous as men. “Men” are ridiculous.

It’s very easy for Red Pill aware men to lose sight of what the Blue Pill conditions men for and how this conditioning has evolved over the course of generations. The latent purpose remains the same (preventing men from adopting their own mental point of origin), but the methods and social mores change fluidly with what the Feminine Imperative finds most efficient for the time. For the past 20 years there’s been a concentrated effort to remove men from deciding their own manhood for themselves.

Rites of Passage

From Remove the Man:

Guys vs. Men

I was participating in a conversation just recently with a young woman of 26 and a young man of 18. The conversation itself wasn’t important, but at one point the young man referred to himself as a ‘Man’. He said something to the effect of, “Well I’m a man, and men do,..” At the word ‘man’ she cut him off with the unconscious snigger that’s resulted from years of feminine ridicule conditioning. Just the mention of a man self-referencing as a “man” is enough to inspire feminine ridicule. It’s laughable for a man to consider himself a man.

This exchange got me to wondering about the turning point at which I began to self-reference as a “Man”. In the face of a constant conditioned ridicule, it’s almost an uncomfortable recognition to distinguish yourself as a Man. It’s too easy to just think of yourself as a ‘guy’ and never be so presumptuous as to insist upon your manhood. In girl-world, to claim to be a Man is to admit to arrogance – it’s to embrace a flawed nature.

It’s important to note here that in embracing your status as a Man, instead of ‘just a guy’, you are passing a meta-shit test. By embracing self-referenced manhood, you are rejecting what a world aligned against you would like you to believe about yourself. You’re endorsing yourself as a Man with self-assurance despite the self-doubt the Feminine Imperative relies upon men believing about themselves, masculinity and the dubious state of manhood as a whole. By flagrantly referring to yourself as a Man you are passing the meta-shit test – you’re overtly stating you’re a Man, but you you’re covertly stating “I Just Get It.”

One of the key elements to unplugging is changing your mind about yourself. This is one of the biggest obstacle to guys coming to accept a Red Pill aware reality. This self-denial of their own ‘manhood’, which becomes a resistance to embracing anything conventionally masculine as being positive, is a foreign thought.

As I mentioned in that post, there used to be a time when boys would go through some rite of passage and be considered a ‘man’ by his family and peers. It’s important for Red Pill men to realize how this passage into a state of manhood has been deliberately confused or shamed out of significance to all but the most traditional of cultures.

Most male rites of passage are painted as cruel and barbaric hazing rituals in a fem-centric society. That’s a popularized and easy connection to make, but what underlies this effort to disqualify manhood as legitimate is a push to force men into compliance with the Feminine Imperative and feminine-primacy.

I would suggest that men coming into a Red Pill awareness need to embrace being a “man”. Red Pill men need a rite of passage of some sort. Sometimes we ask about when a guy finally came into his Red Pill awareness. We compare stories about what we were like when we were still living in a Blue Pill paradigm and then what form of trauma (or not) triggered that Blue Pill disillusionment. We discuss going through the various stages of grief for our past Blue Pill idealism, the nihilism, the anger, the disbelief, then the acceptance and the new enthusiasm of being Red Pill aware and the potential that means.

But there needs to be a rite of passage for passing from that Blue Pill state to a new Red pill awareness and part of this should be a conscious acknowledgement of  giving yourself permission to be a man. This needs to be part of changing your mind about yourself as you become more aware of the agency you really have in a conventionally male respect. You need a point at which you set yourself apart from Blue Pill men and a feminine-primary social order.

Most (Beta) guys have a difficult time embracing the authority and due deference that being a conventional man should convey to him. They are uncomfortable on an ego-personality level with accepting this dominant male role because it goes against everything their feminine-centric upbringing has taught them to internalize.

However, with that authority comes responsibility. I would argue that many a Blue Pill guy is comforted by the lies of equalism because he believes that egalitarianism and the expectations that men and women are functional equals in some way exempts him from his uniquely male burden of performance. On some level of consciousness, even the Beta men who are comforted by equalism still realize that their maleness, their ‘secure’ masculinity, will only ever be merited and judged by his performance. And that performance is firmly grounded in conventionally male tests.

 

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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Pellaeon
Pellaeon
5 years ago

Palleon [sic] – you even acknowledge that you were in fact improving your muscle fitness etc concurrent with getting back out there with chicks True….and then I went MGTOW. I actually went on one date during that MGTOW period and it went nowhere. This chick used to be hot, but gained a shit ton of weight, to the point where I was better looking than she was. It went nowhere. The best shape, physically, I’ve ever been in was during that MGTOW period. I’ve since put back on most of the weight I lost, and still managed to makeout with… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

18:38, Have a marriage, have a relationship, get a prenup.

That’s ignorant, nothing more and nothing less. This sets up men for betaization and frivorce.

Right after that, something close to:
“Create an environment where she’d be foolish to lie / cheat because of your abundance”.

These men are totally out of their depth. They don’t know what they don’t know.
It’s like someone putting out a PUA video that is “Just Be Yourself” and “Looks Always Matter” for half an hour. It’s a fail in so many ways.

“Have a prenup”. Snort!

Joe K
Joe K
5 years ago

@Rollo – At the end of the day, the RSD guys want more than anything to be special snowflakes. That’s it. They wanna be celebrities in the NYC/Miami/LA club scene. They want fame and notoriety. And they will do literally anything to get that. So they’re never gonna agree with you, they’re always gonna be pushing some angle on why they’re the most special snowflakes, why they have the secret equation that nobody else understands. It all starts at the top with Owen and his psychopathic disposition. We can even admire the drive. But ultimately, they’re just dark-triad actors who… Read more »

othergrain
othergrain
5 years ago

Joe K Yea, that’s why everyone says to get your basic grooming and style in order. It’s too easy these days not to. Don’t dress like Guy Fieri. Past than that, I’d link to what scray has said in the past if I could, a certain look will provoke certain reactions. You can then use this in your favor. Certain looks come with certain assumed connotations. If you know where a room will pin your value (based only on how you look) relative to their, you know how you have to game it. That’s different than looks, as in, my… Read more »

DisgruntledEarthling
DisgruntledEarthling
5 years ago

@mersonai
“I mean honestly…if anyone was pure red pill they would just nuke their marriage lololol.”

No, this is not what TRP is. RP is understanding/seeing the truth. What you do with that knowledge is entirely up to you.

There’s a misunderstanding here.

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Joe K Specifically – 10-12 years ago when I was starting out as an awkward virgin, I wore stupid busy-patterned untucked dress shirts. Correlation isn’t causation. Wet pavement doesn’t cause rain. You went out as a socially awkward man. The clothing was not the issue, it was you that was the issue. My look was bad, and it DEFINITELY hampered me. No one could ever tell me differently. Your mind is made up so we should not bother you with facts? Ok. But the fact is, you surely wore those clothes in an awkward manner, with awkard subcomms and no… Read more »

Kate
Kate
5 years ago

“I don’t write what I do for the fucking profit, I write because the truth saves men’s lives.” Rollo, it’s unlikely I’ll ever stop giving you a hard time, but the work you do IS important. There’s a new charlatan every year. Let them go. With every movement, there’s people just dying to throw their hat in the ring for a chance at fame and money. And then there’s the heart of the operation that keeps beating regardless of personal reward. What you’re doing makes a difference in the lives of men with real hardships, not men who prefer illusion… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“Not the socks with sandals thing. Specifically”

If were inclined to be a PUA guru I could produce for you a video (no actresses) showing a 60 year old guy attracting (from across the street) and getting hit on by (specifically by complimenting his outfit) a slim, attractive teenage girl:

While wearing exactly what he shouldn’t to attract young women: nylon strap sandals, with socks. Khaki cargo pants. A T-shirt. Tucked in.

In your n=1 test I’m afraid it wasn’t your outfit. It was you.

Have you tried not being yourself?

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

Addendum: Throw in the additional detail of the cargo pants (shorts) being belted at the proper level for a man, not for a girl.

I am informed that young girls hate that.

hank holiday
hank holiday
5 years ago

@PUA @guys new to PUA/Game I’m gonna feed the ollieollieoxen troll because the untruths he’s spewing here are what most guys already believe and it will crush their development. First looks are VERY helpful in that they give you initial IOIs. Already though, there is an important distinction to make in looks. As Kfg pointed out the “type” of guy you are is a part of your looks. How you dress, how you carry yourself, all contribute to your looks. A “rockstar” is a look, a “movie star” is also a look. These are important to consider, since dressing right… Read more »

SFC Ton
5 years ago

When you are short and ugly it helps to have a look that offsets your looks and the gay shit they pass off as fashion advice makes dudes look like fags. The kind that do the catching and not the pitchers

And before someone posts the link, that masculine style dude looks like he guzzles jizz by the gallon.

SFC Ton
5 years ago

Hank is preaching it on looks

SFC Ton
5 years ago

Have you tried not being yourself?
…….

Pure awesomeness

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@Joe Specifically – 10-12 years ago when I was starting out as an awkward virgin, I wore stupid busy-patterned untucked dress shirts. Ah, the hot geek look. That can work as peacocking if you have the frame to go with it. I wear dress shirts, but tuck them in. Most guys wear T-shirts. I went to clubs in a major US city with the sole mission of approaching every woman I could. Kudos for showing balls. My lack of confidence was one thing – but I was grabbing my balls and approaching. Yeah, lack of confidence doesn’t help…I won’t lie… Read more »

SFC Ton
5 years ago

When the Army decided to teach me to shoot it was 15k rounds a week….. for weeks upon weeks. Burned through 3 barrels on my rifle. After doing that for weeks on top of weeks I was considered proficient

And it wasn’t like I lacked familiarity with fire arms. Having been a sniper for 4 or so years before hand

So forgive me if I don’t buy into this lack of practice time will lead to some level of expertise

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

@SFC Ton:

The Army does what works, and works well, for an Army.

What works best for an individual is often rather different.

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

Still it reminds me of something that Jeff Cooper said, that he joined the Army because he liked to shoot, and he figured they’d give him lots of free ammo.

SFC Ton
5 years ago

Ever get the chance to talk to Tom Knapp? Ask him how how many rounds he shoots. Here’s a hint. It ain’t 6 a week

stuffinbox
5 years ago

PUA positive thinking have an ltr get a pre nup. Looks to me as if the neg publicity for PUA may be too much for these boys and they are slanting to a more FI acceptable presentation.The incongruencies lie in the pua game for ons snl can become a parlour trick that at some point runs out of material in an ltr,see burden of performance. While it is a neccessity to have RP wisdom in an ltr just game and negs and dhv may get you there but it wont get you through it.This blue pill,purple pill,outlook is detrimental and… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Ever get the chance to talk to Tom Knapp?

No, unfortunately. He sure did sell a lot of Benelli shotguns and was fun to watch. I think the record he set with the M3 Super 90 may still stand.

Ask him how how many rounds he shoots. Here’s a hint. It ain’t 6 a week

He wasn’t shooting full house .44 Magnum one handed or two handed, either.
Different tools, different techniques.

rugby11
rugby11
5 years ago

kfg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3j3_iPskjxk
“The Army does what works, and works well, for an Army.

What works best for an individual is often rather different.”
The outsider
http://people.uta.fi/~simo.aaltonen/outsider.pdf

stuffinbox
5 years ago

Have to side up with KFG on this,as I loan my hammer to a newbie and tell him not to teach it any bad habits.If you hold it wrong and possition yourself wrong and breath wrong and pull the trigger or squeeze it instead of just pressing it a million misses isn’t worth a hundred hits.Try scaring a nail into a board.

stuffinbox
5 years ago

Just like real social dynamics,the biggest thing guys need to learn is to stop commiting social suicide.If it isn’t getting the desired results stop doing it.

Joe K
Joe K
5 years ago

@kfg I don’t believe you man. Unless that 60 year old guy is worth 8 figures or legitimately famous. If that teenage girl is ‘hitting on him’ she is just being nice for his sake. She would never be caught dead being his date to a friggin’ fundraiser or something like that. And no, I never ‘tried not being myself’. That’s just sad and pathetic, unless you’re playing dress-up for Halloween or some such shit. Do you actually enjoy that? @hank Not sure if you missed this – that was 10-12 YEARS ago. If I, for shits and giggles, did… Read more »

stuffinbox
5 years ago

And side up with Ton on if you are sending a man into battle,he should have calouses on his cheek and shoulder together with eyes that are used to the strain,and muscle that won’t flinch or fatigue in a fire fight.

SFC Ton
5 years ago

Normally how it’s done is a lot of .22 and dry firing with regular use of the big cailber weapon system. Mostly to cut down on cost. Sight alignment is sight alignment, sight piticure is sight picture, breath control is breath control and trigger squeeze is trigger squeeze

Don’t matter the cailber but if you think that guy only shot 6 rounds a week I have some scrap metal in France you might be interested in

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

And I suppose it’s time to point out again that although most people use the word “practice” to mean both practice and “rehearsal,” they are two different things.

You practice squeezing a trigger. You rehearse combat.

You practice placing a finger on a fretboard. You rehearse a musical piece.

This gets back to leaving “perfect practice” as undefined. Practice is done to perfect basic skills. Rehearsal is done to familiarize a performance.

hank holiday
hank holiday
5 years ago

@joe BTW – you’re now admitting Owen is ‘skeazy’. As I’ve written before – I don’t know the guy personally, but I have read tons of written accounts of lowest-rung newbies who got no results on their RSD seminar, wrote to Owen asking for his ‘guaranteed refund’, and according to them he lied and made up shit and would not refund them. I never said he wasn’t sleazy. I’ve maintained that for a while now that I think he seems a bit sleezy. Once again though, that doesn’t change the fact that his and RSD’s videos are excellent displays of… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

And here I’ll point out that socks were invented by people who needed to keep their feet warm on the odd chilly night, because they didn’t have shoes, only sandals.

It’s not on topic, but it’s one of those interesting quirks of history and the idea of “fashion” that socks are now deemed unacceptable when used as originally intended.

rugby11
rugby11
5 years ago

stuffinbox
“Just like real social dynamics,the biggest thing guys need to learn is to stop commiting social suicide.If it isn’t getting the desired results stop doing it.”
Been working on this all day… Its a constant process
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ICaO00we2I
It almost get’s the best of me if im not aware of my passed behavior.

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Ton Don’t matter the cailber but if you think that guy only shot 6 rounds a week I have some scrap metal in France you might be interested in I’m sure that the old Montana ranch hand shot one cylinder of .44 Magnum through his S&W revolver once in a while. What else he shot I can’t say. But Elmer Keith was very good with that gun, in those hills. The people I know who sometimes fish in Alaska carry .44 Mag revolvers as a back up to their Co-Pilot carbines. They put about 12 rounds per season through the… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“This gets back to leaving “perfect practice” as undefined. Practice is done to perfect basic skills. Rehearsal is done to familiarize a performance.” I’ve perfected my art of practice, learning and mastery of a whole lot of things. It’s quite surprising how it takes a Rollo to explain the red pill, when it is totally non-intelligible to a guy like Mersonia. I mean red pill (as opposed to Game) has been attempted to be explained in examples from real life over and over by some of us old guys. And I probably have spent 20 hours a week on actual… Read more »

stuffinbox
5 years ago

rugby11

If the road to hell is paved with good intentions,and all there are is bad intentions does it meen he has arrived.

I used to think if they knew what I was thinking I would be ostracized,only this line of thinking was the actual self ostracizing. In truth none really care beyond their own heads world.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@Joe K Good story. My problem has never been gaming girls. It has been gaming myself. I found out that I’m autistic in the last few years. The FI does a real number on autists like me…the rules thing is a major cockblocker for me. Despite that, I managed to force myself to ask a hottie for sex when I was 19 (I told her, “I want to make love to you.”). I was scared to death and it was like pulling teeth to get the words out, lol, but she was DTF and was in my social circle. I… Read more »

rugby11
rugby11
5 years ago

stuffinbox “I used to think if they knew what I was thinking I would be ostracized,only this line of thinking was the actual self ostracizing. In truth none really care beyond their own heads world.” Nobody cares about you or me. We care about the best of who we are. Are potential what we are truly capable of. are growth is all that matters if i get two steps ahead and your four steps ahead if you stop to teach me how than i would inherently appreciate it. But we must move on and struggle is what makes it a… Read more »

stuffinbox
5 years ago

rugby11

Now your talkin man,I watched these vids all the way,inspirational.The journey is the goal.

stuffinbox
5 years ago

rugby11

This is the only thing I really have to offer,on the loss of the friends that have gone before me.
Rather than grieve for my loss,I remain thankfull for the times we spent together and treasure the things i learned from them.

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Odd thing happened as I was reprising my best holiday season ever in 20 years (2015). This years 2016 is perhaps the fastest passing year ever, and I can’t hardly stop to get off, but it flew by in record time. For the first time ever, my wife was watching HGTV’s Flip or flop with Tarek and Christina El Moussa. Randomly. Like a marathon Saturday. What struck me and her was that the show was terribly contrived on the flipping houses. For every problem, the couple ran into, the price “to fix it” was like half of on real life.… Read more »

ollieoxenfree1
ollieoxenfree1
5 years ago

@Pellaeon What is the difference between the YaReally quote you used and a confidence scam? The 300lb fella doesn’t have to lose weight, he just needs to believe he’s attractive. Oh don’t be scared, big man, when I said ‘putting in the work’ I didn’t mean hit the gym I meant go to a nightclub and drink margaritas. YaReally even has the cheek to say that it’s all a useful illusion. I mean how stupid do you have to be to buy into this? YaReally is literally telling you he’s a fraud and you’re convinced it’s an elaborate motivational technique.… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

All I know is I don’t have to see a dozen vids from rsd in every comment section anymore, and I’m soooooo good with that. I understand that a bunch of guys got a whole lot out of that rsd stuff, but they seemed to just blithely overlook the silly, goofy stuff. That’s what tipped me off. I even told Ya that I could take all of these rsd knuckleheads out on the town with me and they’d go home empty-handed, guaranteed. I personally don’t buy most of their video antics, but I kept my opinions to myself for the… Read more »

Johnycomelately
Johnycomelately
5 years ago

Kudos and hat tip to Rollo for pulling the RSD clips.

How many hours of sarging is required to create ‘infield’ videos? How many are scripted?

Any boob with a camera could pull that shit off, I have zero game and I could pull off these videos in a week.

If Ya is worth his salt he could overcome his ‘ego buffers’ and post without the links.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@AR

But Elmer Keith was very good with that gun [.44 mag], in those hills.

I heard he used .44 mag for shooting squirrels. He wanted the really big calibers for big game. Something like the .500 nitro express.

Pellaeon
Pellaeon
5 years ago

Any boob with a camera could pull that shit off, I have zero game and I could pull off these videos in a week.

Looking forward to seeing it.

EhIntellect
EhIntellect
5 years ago

“I get that the fear is that a noob will spend all his time reading and contemplating and chatting in forums about Game or TRP or whatever at the expense of going out into the field and practicing. ” My oldest son has been reading PUA for 8 months…poor results. This weekend when he actually tried applying RP, not so much PUA…it worked. RP is understandable now to him qua him, not as a listicle of things to do. He can be the naturally quiet him, this strength to his benefit, lead with composure and tell the date what to… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Do they endorse Todd (and likely Owen’s) take on marriage now too (get a prenup, lol).

Papa does preach…

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/07/04/article-2168718-13EBEF14000005DC-851_468x628.jpg

http://www.aleksandervitkin.com/interview-with-nick-kho-papa-from-real-social-dynamics-networking-masterclass/

http://abovethedeck.com/ as featured on Bravo’s Below Deck

RSD brand extension has been going on for a while… just now some of the younger guys are hitting the age as well… Makes sense, need to generate those profits. Also ties into Point of View, now that these guys have had enough experience getting pussy, they are free to realize there is more to life…

LOL

Sentient
Sentient
5 years ago

Hank If they start going too much more into Tony Robbins bullshit, we’ll end up ditching them for guys who make pure PUA videos. But that won’t change the fact that their old videos are awesome, just like James Marshall’s daygame videos are great even though he’s a Blue pill guy and now some crazy buddhist monk lol. James Marshall is the direction RSD are barreling towards. James is not crazy – sounds like you are just parroting Yareally here… James is good representation of a dynamic, passionate and authentic guy – who has a Point of View borne of… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

No benefit in legal marriage in 2016 Tinder culture. Thousands of orbiters offering trips, cash and prizes daily. Best way to have children and avoid divorce and legal issues is via a pLtr with cheese. Only men married during the Paleolithic era were successful because shortly afterward, everything changed including female nature.

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

….. and that’s just in the clubs

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@Rollo: do I count as one of you RSD guys here? I’m very thankful for the Rational Male, I was very honored to receive the audio book from your offer on the site a while ago (it isn’t quite having an autographed copy but it will do for now). I’m glad that you reversed your decision to ban RSD videos (even you are posting some now to illustrate your point about them). It is nice that you kept YaReally’s archive on your blog roll. I’m sad that YaReally left but I don’t blame Rollo for that. I’m definitely a YaReally… Read more »

rugby11
rugby11
5 years ago

stuffinbox

“This is the only thing I really have to offer,on the loss of the friends that have gone before me.
Rather than grieve for my loss,I remain thankfull for the times we spent together and treasure the things i learned from them.”

Joe K
Joe K
5 years ago

@Blax @Rollo

RSD Julian definitely gets plenty of notches. He’s good looking, bold, commandeering, and a complete psychopath. To say none of those guys would get laid hangin’ out with you – no.

Mark Manson / Entropy had a good spate there for a couple years. The ‘Honesty’ era material was good shot. He’s done a lot of backsliding since then. He also looks like shit. Kinda like the woman who the moment she gets a ring starts getting fat and acne laden.

YaReallyForum
5 years ago

“I’m definitely a YaReally fan, and it is a great loss for me not to have him comment on FRs posted here”

The real loss is not that he is not posting here, but that he is not posting ANYWHERE

Since YaReally is concerned with doxing and doesn’t want to maintain a website or blog,this forum has been created:

https://www.reddit.com/r/yareally/

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

1. YaReally removed himself. Apparently he did not like being asked questions regarding RSD. No one actually did anything what so ever to Ya. 2. What the actual fuck? I love The Smoking Tire YouTube channel. If I consistently posted vids here for years from one specific source, 5 or 6 at a time, and anyone were to ask me if I had some kind of stake in TST, that would not be an unreasonable question causing me to flip out and throw a hissy fit, penning my farewell post. I’m losing track of how many times Rollo has said… Read more »

theasdgamer
5 years ago

Any boob with a camera

Sho m3 ur b00bz

Joe K
Joe K
5 years ago

Truth vs hatred avoidance.

Pick one. You can’t have both unless this is solely a cadre of sanguine OMGs who’ve totally transcended anger phase. But even you guys- when I put it that binary way, stemming from Rollo’s comment right above (outright shutting in the new PoPT hucksters), do you finally get how ridiculous it is to hold some rigid, critical view towards nihilism?

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@intellect, so humble his moniker

this strength to his benefit, lead with composure and tell the date what to do without fear, and she’s asking for another date.

Does son #1 understand Plate Theory and the dangers of Oneitis? Does he understand the PULL that his feelings will have on him to adopt Oneitis because SHE’s a speshul snowflake?

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Re-viewed some of the latest “Red Pill Vs. White Knight” vid. It is stated that men are to develop themselves and accumulate resources why? For their own purpose / mission? Or to share with girls? Why, to share with girls, of course. So that you can have whe awesome experience of enjoying life with a girlie, for a while at least. RSD is basically taking a feminist view. This surprised me but it should not, because since we swim in an ocean of feminism, either you actively resist feminist thinking or you passively accept it. Feminists are always willing to… Read more »

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@Rollo: no doubt some people, ranging from FI, “reformed” PUAs, Purple Pillers, MRAs, whatever have an stake in the game obscuring Red Pill truths, for different reasons. But it is also true that the moderate, rational tone of Rational Male in presenting those truths makes those truths more *accessible* for those that are ready or nearly ready to open their eyes to them (I wondered about more credible or more inviting, but I think accessible is what fits), and the less moderate (and often exaggerated) tone of other sources makes it easier to deny the same truths. When I arrived… Read more »

SFC Ton
5 years ago

I. Thought I was in the man of sphere but it looks like wandered into some high-school girls and their 14 year old drama bullshit

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

IAS, Chateau / Roissy started off as a pickup site if I remember right. So no surprise if it had a different tone than TRM. Atho’s Married Man Sex Life started off as a project / self improvement oriented site before the girls took it over. The Spearhead started as Welmer’s own self-exploration after his divorce rape. Dalrock has been as much about defending marriage as about explaining “what went wrong” in male/female relations within a larger religious context. I don’t mess with Reddit so I have no opinion. This leaves out other sites with low traffic, or sites like… Read more »

dr zipper
dr zipper
5 years ago

@Ton – another goddamn bullseye

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@Anonymous Reader: of course Red Pill isn’t all about anger. But a lot of what passes itself off as Red Pill is about anger, making that particular FI lie easier to believe in. That is my point. There are lots of RP men that don’t hate women. Most of them are apparently reading and commenting on the Rational Male. Rollo himself sounds like he loves women (although I’m sure he isn’t fond of his sister in law in particular). YaReally clearly loves women. Owen I think loves money (or power?) above women, and I’m not sure Owen himself is Red… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Ton, did I read correctly that the Army stars rifle training off with .22 rimfire? If that’s right, do they put .22 rimfire uppers onto M4 lowers, or use separate .22 rimfire rifles? About how many rounds of .22 rimfire before moving on to 5.56mm? A friend of mine bought a .22 upper for his Ar15 a few years back when the ammo shortage really got bad, and was pleased with it for his purposes. He could do all the drills within pretty broad limits on a small range same as with 5.56mm on a real range, keeping his skills… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“Lol, what the fuck was Andy babbling about? I must’ve missed some epic shit.” He just hit the limit of his popoff valve is all. Sometimes it happens if you’ve got your turbo boost set too high. “I heard he used .44 mag for shooting squirrels.” The original squirrel gun was .50 cal, albeit subsonic. ” . . . I think Owen in particular is even more obsessed with money than with Game from some spread out comments I’ve seen in videos where he was addressing the crowd in some seminars.” You should hear how he talks at the sort… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

IAS @Anonymous Reader: of course Red Pill isn’t all about anger. But a lot of what passes itself off as Red Pill is about anger, making that particular FI lie easier to believe in. That is my point. Ok, so what? There are lots of RP men that don’t hate women. Most of them are apparently reading and commenting on the Rational Male. Most of them? That’s dumb. Just dumb. HINT: A lot of men in the US don’t use the net for much more than surfing sports sites and social media. Owen I think loves money (or power?) above… Read more »

theasdgamer
5 years ago

Leftist elitist attacks on races in the U.S. context Attacks on races have been occurring for decades, initiated by the leftist crony-capitalist elites like George Soros, Nelson Rockefeller, Michael Bloomberg, etc. Blacks were targeted to make them dependent on govt. handouts, which would make them compliant and elicit their political support for leftist elite shills–both Democrats and liberal Republicans. No fault divorce. Which leads to black single moms working two or three jobs and inadequate supervision of their kids and STILL needing govt. handouts. Which leads to youngsters in gangs. Which leads to black men in prison. Ditto latinos. Whites… Read more »

newlyaloof
5 years ago

@Rollo, Whether purposefully or not, RSD Todd is incorrectly equating Red Pill with MGTOW. He hasn’t labeled his own stuff Purple Pill, but the three points he mentioned in the end of the video are basically Red Pill TRM talking points. Looks like a marketing battle is going on for ownership over “rational” advice.

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

” . . . Cassie Jaye, the “feminist” . . .” If you baby, make you crazy, don’t where she goin’. Eyes so messed up that they look, which way the wind is blowin’. “What reason does YaReally have for denying Red Pill truths, and did he ever even do that?” When he got bit and caught baby rabies he went full tilt boogie and tried to red wash the whole thing, but a poison pill in a sugar coating is still a poison pill. And for some reason Mr. Field Experience Trumps Everything didn’t give a crap about FRs… Read more »

SFC Ton
5 years ago

No AR you use 5.56 or 7.62 etc from day one. The army has money to spare… sort of. But outside of rampant federal/ state/ local spending, doing most of your training is with.22 then firing a few rounds of whatever else is standard practice for us old school guys. I’m 46 and that’s how it’s been done before my day They use to pimp. 357’s by saying you train with .38 wad cutters then do 2-3 training iterations with .357 and maybe only one of those with hollow points and +p ammo. #1 to save the most critical resource… Read more »

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

@Rollo: you see more RSD stuff than I do and are more experienced, I didn’t spot they were going “girlfriend friendly”. When you mentioned their more “positive” branding I didn’t understand it was going to be “girlfriend friendly”. I’m pretty sure Ya doesn’t support that, given his anti-monogamy position (he is staunchly anti-marriage and all for keeping plates even if you have a primary LTR). I was pretty sure YaReally was quite critical of Roosh in the past and did a search on YaReally archive to confirm. Similarly on Athol Kay. With the archive it is easy to see where… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

” . . . if the Army really did / does go .22 rimfire for initial rifle training, I think I know where a lot of the .22 production went, and it wasn’t into anyone’s garage.” The Army’s use of rimfire is stable, predictable and factored into production capacity. The consumer market is hoarding .22LR in multiple case lots against a zombie apocalypse, which is a new phenomenon. It has always been bought before on a consumer basis – you bought what you needed, when you needed it. It was as cheap and as available as penny candy (if you… Read more »

EhIntellect
EhIntellect
5 years ago

“Does son #1 understand Plate Theory and the dangers of Oneitis? Does he understand the PULL that his feelings will have on him to adopt Oneitis because SHE’s a speshul snowflake?” The first chapter in The Rational Male: There is no One. Yes, he does. he’s read it. Plate theory too, asked me questions re: Plates a few months ago. Plate theory was liberating for him. Now…he’s clinical, that was his big hang up so far. In a way it’s helping him now as he sees the world analytically. As Rollo’s new post states, this unemotional calm is a strength…his… Read more »

othergrain
othergrain
5 years ago

“That’s just it Joe, do you know how many times I’ve written about how nihilism isn’t the last stop for the Red Pill train?” That’s what I was hoping Andy would realize in his recent situation, his last post seemed better. “In all honesty I think YaReally and Scray’s take on Game would be too Red Pill for the new ‘girlfriend friendly’ PoPT shift that RSD is making now.” I think so too, but not going to speak for them. I think it had to do with the fact that they comment -here- lol rather than just a PUA lair… Read more »

Joe K
Joe K
5 years ago

@Rollo – As you’ve written a million times, your work is not prescriptive. So for you to outright declare that ‘nihilism is not the last stop on the red pill train’ – it makes no sense to assert that, broadly. In ‘The Dangers of the Red Pill’, you talk about how relationships for unplugged men can easily be torn apart simply on account of the ‘dangerous truths’ they wield, and can dispense with at any time of their choosing. How that can be a blessing or a curse. But for some men, that is in fact a curse, especially if… Read more »

SFC Ton
5 years ago

Who care if they love? Wet and mostly willing is good enough

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Ton No AR you use 5.56 or 7.62 etc from day one. The army has money to spare… sort of. Ok. Thanks for that data. There have been times when the green machine used .22 for initial training, but that’s back when 30-06 was the standard cartridge. I was wondering. Thanks again. But outside of rampant federal/ state/ local spending, doing most of your training is with.22 then firing a few rounds of whatever else is standard practice for us old school guys. I’m 46 and that’s how it’s been done before my day I’m familiar with that concept. It’s… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

kfg The consumer market is hoarding .22LR in multiple case lots against a zombie apocalypse, which is a new phenomenon. Well, new-ish. People did that back pre Y2K. Some great deals in 2000 and 2001. People did that back in the mid 1990’s also. I knew men who were earnestly estimating what a lifetime supply of ammo for every caliber they cared about would entail, when it looked like the gun grabbers were going to require some kind of license to buy ammo – like the law that goes into effect in California next month, if I read it right.… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Joe K
I know that women do not love, full stop.

Yes, they do. They love opportunisitically; they love like women but not like men.

There is no hope in that, because I need women for sex and I have loved women in the past, deeply. Fuck man, I wish it were different, but it ain’t.

They love differently. They can love very deeply, in the “Ride or Die” sense (but not the Deep Conversion In IMAX sense, heh). You need to free yourself of the expectation that women can be like men.

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

ADS Gamer is fond of Taming of the Shrew. Cole Porter’s Kiss Me, Kate goes over the same territory as a musical. Very listenable music. The movie version ahas a few things cut out. This song stayed in.

As a child I thought this song was funny. As a man I found it annoying. Now I find it funny again, in a different way.

SFC Ton
5 years ago

I use to buy ammo by the pallet loads

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

@SFC Ton:

When I could shoot that much (kid living up a mountain in Vermont), I didn’t have the money.

Now that I have the money (old fart living in a city in NY), I can’t shoot that much.

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

And in Vermont there used to be a Rite of Passage, at about 8-10 years old, depending on the kid:

Being handed a single shot rifle, four cartridges, and being told, “Come back with four kills and we can talk about giving you more cartridges.”

And you had never been sent out hunting with a firearm alone before. No talk. No idea that it was coming. Just all of a sudden, “Here. Go.”

SFC Ton
5 years ago

LOL I was making money under the table and had to spend it on something. So I would organize group buys of all sorts of things and pay cash for my share. Mostly shit for the freedom, firepower and Fuckyeah! Lifestyle. Guns shit, car parts, lift kits, shit for my bike etc etc 9mm has its advantages. Round capacity alone is a big deal, ammo is cheaper as its made internationally and imo it is easier to teach someone to shoot with semiautos. Cops are semi trained at best so cutting down on reloads in a fire fight is a… Read more »

mersonia
5 years ago

@Palleon

“Who is the blond? She’s cute.”

Lauren Conrad

@Disgrunt

“No, this is not what TRP is. RP is understanding/seeing the truth. What you do with that knowledge is entirely up to you.

There’s a misunderstanding here.”

Yeah .Most men don’t do anything with the truth they learn ,and can’t accept it. Actually a lot of them just grow angry and end up worse. It’s totally up to you if you even do anything with the information.

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[…] Rollo Tomassi says in his recent post “Rites of Passage” […]

stuffinbox
5 years ago

Mrs. Box holds tighter to the younger kids and the youngest daughter left the nest later and less able to fly,but with more resolve than the rest?. Now it is christmas she comes home for winter break and brings a puppy home in the form of an 18yo baby hughey.I am withholding mayhem not as much to protect my daughter as a mercy killing.This one is hopeless,they don’t ask for help,but the wife suggests that if I have work for them they could use the money,yet they don’t ask for a job.wtf? I have two weeks left on a contract,this… Read more »

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[…] Rites of Passage, The Rational Male […]

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[…] had a really good comment from Rites of Passage from Elooie I’ve been meaning to get back to for a while […]

Augustus West
Augustus West
5 years ago

Bitchez

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[…] had a really good comment from Rites of Passage from Elooie I’ve been meaning to get back to for a while […]

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[…] Rites of Passage […]

Bjorn779
Bjorn779
3 years ago

Great site. Informative.

Sai
Sai
1 year ago

Holy shit what an insightful comment. My instinct tells me to get out of there when a women starts telling me her problems but my bp conditioning tells me to sit still and hear her out.

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[…] Rational Male: Rites of Passage […]

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[…] Rational Male: Rites of Passage […]

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[…] The Rational Male: Rites of Passage (2016-12-5) […]

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