The Red Pill Balance

Before you move on to reading today’s post, please take 14 minutes and listen to Niko Choski’s latest here Man:the being made of stone, it’ll be relevant in the second half of this post.

Niko is MGTOW, and from what I know is fairly highly regarded in that sphere. I did an interview with him back in August and since then have become a semi-regular listener of his youtube channel. We’ve occasionally bounced ideas off one another since the interview and I hold Niko in the highest respect for his intellectual approach and insights.

So it’s with that in mind that I’m going to use his latest offering here as a contrast to what I’m going into today.

Reader Divided Line stopped me in my writing tracks on another post with this comment from the last post thread. Not the least of which because I’d just finished listening to Niko’s audio here, but also because it was an interesting juxtaposition to what I’d planned to go into today. I’m going to quote Divided Line here and riff a bit as I go (emphasis mine):

@reloadedbeats

A lot of what you’ve said here echos my own thinking to such a degree that it’s as if you read my mind. I agree 100%.

What you’re talking about here, I think, is the inherent value of goodness or justice. I think Plato took up this question in the Republic and nailed it better than most.

In the beginning of the dialogue the question is “what is justice?” But it quickly transforms into “what is the value of justice?” In other words, if goodness wins us no reward, then what value does it have? Is it valuable in its own right? Would it have value even if it cost us something, or indeed cost us everything?

Glaucon puts the question like this (paraphrasing): “What if the perfectly just man is seen by everyone as perfectly unjust, while the perfectly unjust man is seen as perfectly just?” He then puts it on Socrates to effectively prove that, even in this scenario, justice would be worth it.

We could gender this question and simply ask “what if the perfectly good man is seen as perfectly unattractive to women, while the perfectly evil man is seen as perfectly attractive?”

Is goodness worth it even if it isn’t profitable sexually or socially? It’s the same question.

Why be a ‘good’ man when what we consider good by both personal and social measures isn’t rewarded (or only grudgingly rewarded), while what we consider ‘bad’ is what is enthusiastically rewarded with women’s genuine desire and intimacy? In other words, Hypergamy doesn’t care about what men consider good or bad.

It seems like this is the predicament red pill awareness puts us in when we have to consider the value of our formerly beta self. What makes the beta the beta is his weakness, of course, but it is simultaneously his civility. We’re not defective people for wanting or even needing the possibility love, empathy, truth, friendship, kindness, and – above all else – trust in our lives. It just makes us human. If we project our deeply rooted desires for these things and treat others the way we want to be treated, wouldn’t society be better off for it? And isn’t this what the supplicating, loyal beta does when latches on to a woman he believes to the “the One?”

No Quarter Given

In my post (and book chapter) Of Love and War I quote a reader who summed up this want for relief from men’s inherent Burden of Performance:

We want to relax. We want to be open and honest. We want to have a safe haven in which struggle has no place, where we gain strength and rest instead of having it pulled from us. We want to stop being on guard all the time, and have a chance to simply be with someone who can understand our basic humanity without begrudging it. To stop fighting, to stop playing the game, just for a while.

We want to, so badly.

If we do, we soon are no longer able to

When I consider Niko’s perspective alongside this I begin to see a stark paradox; mens’ want for a relief or a respite from that performance burden tends to be their undoing. I wont get too deep into this, but one reason I see the MGTOW sphere being so seductive is the hopeful promise of that same relief. Simply give up. Refuse to play along and reject the burden altogether. Japan’s herbivorous men crisis is a graphic example of the long term effects of this.

However, this is the same mistake men make in their Blue Pill, Beta conditioning. They believe that if they meet the right girl, if they align correctly with that special ONE, then they too can give up and not worry about their performance burden – or relax and only make the base effort necessary to keep his ONE happy.

The Beta buys the advertising that his Blue Pill conditioning has presented to him for a lifetime. Find the right girl who accepts you independent of your performance, and you can let down your guard, be vulnerable, forget any notion of Red Pill truths because your girl is a special specimen who places no conditions on her love, empathy, intimate acceptance or genuine desire for you.

And this is also very seductive and inuring for the Beta who’s been conditioned to believe there can realistically be a respite from his burden.

That’s how it seemed to work in my own life. Looking back on it, I was so grateful to my ex, who was easily the most attractive girl I’d ever been with, that I would have taken a bullet for her. I didn’t want anybody else. I didn’t even think about other girls – the first time that had ever happened to me in a relationship. I can remember thinking that even if she gained weight, lost her looks, and got old, I’d still want her. I would have “loved” her forever. I was good and ready to cash in my chips, exit the SMV, and retire. I would have arranged my whole life around making her happy and would have felt lucky to have had the privilege.

At the time, all of that felt noble and brave, but looking back on it, it just seems pathetic and pathological, the result of my neediness. But the thing is, what if she had reciprocated it? Wouldn’t it have been a relationship worth having? Had she reciprocated it – if any woman was capable of reciprocating that – it wouldn’t have been Disney movie bullshit, but the real thing. We’re supposed to think such a thing is possible and that’s what keeps us playing along. The Red Pill is really about recognizing its impossibility, I think. There is no possible equity. To be sure, a woman can be loyal and dedicated to you, in theory, but she’ll only give that loyalty to the guy who needs it least. It’s like a cruel, cosmic joke.

Such as it is, that girl lied to me, ran for the hills the moment I showed weakness and needed her the most, and cheated on me. Big surprise, right? With a red pill awareness now I can see how predictable that result was, but at the time I was blindsided by it. I never saw it coming. I couldn’t understand how she could do such a thing when I’d invested so much in her, when I was so willing to give her all the things I’d always wanted most. I assumed she wanted the same things – men and women are the same, right? That’s what the egalitarians tell us. I couldn’t understand how those things could be so valueless to her that she would just throw it all away like that. She didn’t value them at all.

On occasion I’ve suggested that men watch the movie Blue Valentine. You can check out the plot summary on the IMDB link there, but you really need to watch the movie (on Netflix) to appreciate what I’m going to relate here. The main character suffers from the same romantic idealism and want for a perfected, mutually shared concept of love between himself and the single mother he eventually marries.

It follows along the same familiar theme of Alpha while single / Beta after marriage that most men experience in what they believe is their lot. More often than not the Alpha they believed their wives or LTR girlfriends perceived they were was really just a guy who’d do for their needs of whatever phase of maturity she found herself in.

By itself this would be enough for me to endorse the movie, but the story teaches a much more valuable lesson. What Dean (Ryan Gosling) represents is a man who idealistically buys the Blue Pill promise that men and women share a mutual love concept, independent of what their sexual strategies and innate dispositions prompt them to. Because of this misbelief Dean gives up on the burden of his performance. He drops his ambitions and relaxes with his ONE girl, contenting himself in mediocrity, low ambitions and his idealistic belief in a woman sharing and sustaining his romanticized Blue Pill love ideal – performancelessness.

He relaxes, lets his guard down and becomes the vulnerable man he was taught since birth that women would not only desire, but require for their false, performanceless notions of mutual intimacy. The men of this sphere who don’t find themselves divorced from their progressively bored wives are often the ones who trade their ambitions and passions for a life of mediocrity and routine,…so long as the security blanket of what they believe is a sustainable, passable semblance of that love (but not desire) exists in their wives or girlfriends.

Their burden of performance is sedated so long as their women are reasonably comfortable or sedate themselves. That false sense of contentment is only temporary and leads to their own ruin or decay.

No Quarter Expected

I’ve since watched something similar happen to a friend not once but twice. It’s textbook, standard shit. AWALT.

Cultivating these unrequited beta aspects of somebody’s character, if we did it on a mass scale, creates a society worth living in. It’s a civilized society where these things are most possible and it’s a truly worthwhile relationship where both parties regard each other this way and can full expect it to be reciprocated. It requires faith and trust, but we all know better. Our survival depends on knowing better, post sexual revolution. Women were never worthy of such trust and they’re entirely incapable of it. They were never capable of it. We were just supposed to think they were and cultivate the better aspects of our natures in order to be worthy of them.

The ugly truth of it is that women were never worthy of us.

Women’s sexuality doesn’t reward justice or goodness – if it did, reciprocity would be the norm and none of us would be confused about relational equity. Women reward not goodness, but strength. And strength is amoral, meaning it can be either just or unjust, good or bad. The guy with strength can either be the villain or the hero – it makes no difference to women. They can’t tell the difference and in truth don’t care anyway.

There is a set of the Red Pill that subscribe to what I’d call a ‘scorched earth‘ policy. It’s very difficult to reconcile the opportunistic basis of women’s Hypergamous natures with men’s hopeful, idealistic want for a love that’s independent from their performance burden. So the idea is again one of giving up. They say fuck it, women only respond to the most base selfishly individualistic, socio or psychopathic of men, so the personality they adopt is one that hammers his idealism flat and exaggerates his ‘Dark Triad‘ traits beyond all believability.

It’s almost a vengeful embrace of the most painful truths Red Pill awareness presents to us, and again I see why the scorched earth PUA attitude would seem attractive. Women do in fact observably and predictably reward assholes and excessively dominant Alpha men with genuine desire and sexual enthusiasm.

Agreeableness and humility in men has been associated with a negative predictor of sex partners.

The problem inherent in applying reciprocal solutions to gender relations is the belief that those relations are in any way improved by an equilibrium between both sexes interests. Solution: turn hard toward the asshole energy. Men understand the rules of engagement with women and they know Game well enough to capitalize on it so why not capitalize on that mastery of it?

The dangers of this are twofold. First, it lacks real sustainability and eventually becomes a more sexualized version of MGTOW. Secondly, “accidents” happen. MGTOWs will warn us that any interaction with a woman bears a risk of sexual harassment or false rape claims, but for the scorched earth guy a planned unplanned pregnancy on the part of a woman attempting to lock down her Alpha is far more likely to be his long term downfall. Emotional and provisioning liabilities for a child tends to pour cold water on the scorched earth guy.

It wouldn’t be inaccurate to say that women are philosophically, spiritually, and morally stunted. They have a limited capacity for adherence to higher ideals and this is why they don’t know or care what actual justice or goodness is. Like Schopenhauer said, they “mistake knowledge for its appearance.”

It took me a long time to be able to accept this. That is women’s true inferiority – and women are profoundly inferior. And I take no pleasure in recognizing that, as if I’m somehow touting the superiority of team men. It’s awful, in fact. Dealing with it is the ultimate burden of performance for us as individual men, but also as a society. At some point we’re simply going to have to confront women’s moral inferiority. If we look at our institutions, the very same that are crumbling now all around us, we can see that previous generations of men already figured this out. We just forgot what they knew.

So what’s the answer? Is justice valuable for its own sake? All of us would probably on some level want to be able to say yes and argue the case, but I don’t know if I can do so convincingly.

I’m with you on this, part of me thinks “Fuck this. It can’t be like this.” But it is. I wish I had the answer.

Niko attempts to redress the assumption that men feel some necessity to be someone they really aren’t. In Vulnerability I go into how the Feminine Imperative is only too willing to exploit this self-doubt by labeling men as existential posers and their conventional masculinity is a ‘mask’ – a false charade – they put on to hide the real vulnerability that lies beneath.

Unfortunately many men accept this as gospel. It’s part of their Blue Pill upbringing and is an essential aspect of their feminine ‘sensitivity training’ and gender loathing conditioning. When masculinity is only ever a mask men wear the only thing real about them is what real women tell them it should be.

What we don’t consider is the legitimacy of our need for strength, independence, stoicism, and yes, emotional restraint. That need to be bulwark against women’s emotionality, that need to wear psychological armor against the Red Pill realities of women’s visceral natures is legitimate and necessary. If a man’s vulnerability is ever it’s because his display of it is so uncharacteristic of his normal impenetrability. The woman’s demeanor, and the narrator’s voice, in the last post’s Campbell’s soup commercial is an example of the weak, vulnerability women expect from lesser child-men – and a commensurate expectation of him to just get that he needs to be strong.

That’s the inconsistency in women’s Hypergamous nature and the narrative of the Feminine Imperative’s messaging. Be sweet, open, vulnerable; it’s OK to cry, ask for help, be sick and weakened, we’re all equal and empathetic – but, Man Up, “what, you need your mommy?”, assert yourself, the asshole is sexier than you, where’s your self-discipline? – but, your masculine identity is a mask you wear to hide the real you,……

I play many roles in the male life I lead today, and I’ve played many others in my past. I’m Rollo Tomassi in the manosphere, I’m a father to my daughter, a husband and lover to my wife, a brilliant artist and pragmatic builder of brands in my job, an adventure seeker when I’m on my snowmobile and a quiet contemplator of life and God when I’m fishing. All of those roles and more are as legitimate as I choose to make them. Do I have moments of uncertainty? Do I waiver in my resolve sometimes? Of course, but I don’t let that define me because I know there is no real strength in relating that.

The Red Pill Balance

Red Pill awareness is both a blessing and a curse. The trick is balancing your Red Pill expectations with your previous Blue Pill idealism. It’s not a sin for you to want for an idealistic reality – that’s what sets us apart from women’s opportunism. You do yourself no favors in killing you idealistic, creative sense of wonderment of what could be. The trick is acknowledging that aspect of your male self.

KFG had a comment to this point:

If men did not hold heroism as a higher ideal, we wouldn’t be here.
If women did not hold survival as a higher ideal, we wouldn’t be here.

This was precisely the dynamic I was referring to when I wrote Idealism.

Men’s idealism and idealistic concepts of love are the natural counterbalance to women’s pragmatic, Hypergamously rooted opportunism and opportunistic concepts of love and vice versa. Those differing concepts can be applied very unjustly and very cruelly, or very judiciously and honorably, but they are the reality of our existence.

Red Pill awareness isn’t just about understanding women’s innate natures and behaviors, it’s also understanding your own male nature and learning how it fits in to that new awareness and living in a new paradigm. Is something like justice valuable for its own sake? I’d say so, but that concept of justice must be tempered (or enforced) in a Red Pill understanding of what to expect from women and men. Red Pill awareness doesn’t mean we should abandon our idealism or higher order aspirations, and it certainly doesn’t mean we should just accept our lot in women’s social frame because of it. It does mean we need to balance that idealism in as pragmatic a way with the realities of what the Red Pill shows us.

 

5 1 vote
Article Rating

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

Speak your mind

807 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
SJF
SJF
6 years ago

@Dutchman Maximize your strengths minimize your weaknesses. Your relationship with your children is a great strength. Amp that up. Good parenting is a dopamine input. (or as KFG would say, it makes you feel good). And in the state you are in–a rut–you need as many feel good things as you can get. And don’t forget to enhance the masculine in your son and he feminine in your daughter. Your weakness: Not socializing well with high quality men and being a girlfriend to other women (which is essentially what you are doing if you are not fucking them. ..and no… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
6 years ago

Cosign Kitten Holiday’s long post on how women divorce. That pretty much describes at least one frivorce I’ve seen in the last couple of years, and guess what? Once the youngest is out of the house and child support ends, she’s gonna be miserable anyway.

averagechump
6 years ago

@KittenHoliday, This is a really fucked up thing to say, but regardless, your testimony about how your divorce went through really made me fucking pissed, like at a deeply rooted, biological level. Fuck chivalry. If you were standing in front of me at the moment I was reading that, I would have punched you in the face several times over. You essentially set the example to your children that family is trivial, having two biological parents together really isn’t that important, you have no moral obligations to stay with your wife, or your husband, even if you have children with… Read more »

Kitten Holiday
6 years ago
Reply to  averagechump

@averagechump Thanks for your comments. I really can’t blame you for the level of anger you feel. I feel it too. In a divorce everyone loses. It’s really a terrible situation that can lead to emotional and financial bankruptcy as well as a host of other problems for the individuals, the family unit and society. I see and feel the effects of all these repercussions too. The intent of my long post on divorce was not in any way to excuse people of their choices or actions. There are consequences for everything and sometimes they are very harsh. My intention… Read more »

psyllium
psyllium
6 years ago

We shouldn’t automatically see Red Pill truths in a naturalistic/materialistic context:

woodchipperz
woodchipperz
6 years ago

Hey, fuck you, Rollo! Per your recommendation I watched Blue Valentine. I cringed through the whole fucking thing. I’m reading some comments just to get the Blue Pill stink off me. I guess it hit a soft spot. In all fairness, it really did honestly show men’s BP idealism vs women’s contempt and disgust for it in their opertunism. It wasn’t too long ago that I thought if I was taking care of my family that I’d be loved and appreciated for it. I am just starting to break out of the anger phase. As a fan of Atlas Shrugged,… Read more »

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

I mentioned a couple weeks ago that the end of my daughter’s two year serial monogamous relationship with a blue pill guy came to and end a year ago (good thing) after they watched Blue Valentine. Heheh. Guys should watch it and don’t be the character Dean. Woodchippers, “However, I can’t help but think her sudden change of heart is either an opertunistic step towards a frivorce or a realization that she doesn’t have the backup options she originally thought. Either way, not sure if it’s just postponing the inevitable or if things can legitimately be turned around like a… Read more »

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

@Kitten Holiday “Women do not, currently have healthy understanding of how their hormones and drives and desires affect us. I am not a man but when I think of a man’s drives they run in a straight line toward resolution. Sexual drive –> sexual urge –> sexual intent —.>sexual release. When I think of a woman’s drives, the don’t have a straight line. They are more complicated. Without an understanding of what drives us, what we want, what we are looking for, we don’t know what comes after the —> arrow. We don’t know what will relieve it. As you… Read more »

Kitten Holiday
6 years ago
Reply to  SJF


Thank you for that comment. I actually love that explanation and that actually is more in line with some of my other thinking about women and femininity wherein I believe two of our basic needs are security and reassurance. That speaks to the comfort and fullness described in the Dieda quote. I’ve just ordered the book and am excited to dive in.

averagechump
6 years ago

@Kitten That is an interesting comment. You are still an insufferable cunt, and the time you spent writing that comment could have been spent doing something more productive, like killing yourself, but that is neither here nor there. lolollogo In all honesty, it is a real pity that women such as yourself have been misled and that their children have to pay for it. Although I respect the goal of your blog in being a guiding light for other fucked up shivved women similar to yourself, I doubt it will have a positive change on any dedicated reader. Soviet Russia… Read more »

Andy
Andy
6 years ago

@kitten Yowch! Try not to take anything personally. We’ve got a lot of damaged dudes around here. @dutchman I totally forgot about this book. I don’t even remember how I found it, but you should definitely have your wife read it. It’s basically a story about a woman that is about to get divorced and it kind of explains men, and how wives should treat their husbands and sons. I really think it might help you considering the situation. It’s kind of religious, but the message is legit. @kitten if you haven’t read it you should take a gander. http://issuu.com/bouga/docs/secrets_of_fascinating_womanhood… Read more »

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

@averagechump January 16th, 2016 at 6:19 pm Congratulations! You just won a prize. Most moronic comment in the last 4 years. 6:19 on a Saturday night. Couldn’t you have waited till after Midnight? Kitten’s writing skills are impressive. Her red pill understanding and her expressions of it are greenhorn. But she admits to it in her writing and it is obvious that she is trying to get her legs. For her, there is a lot of gold in them thar’ manosphere blogs and a red pill girl (I think she like’s it) is going to mine it for the distillation… Read more »

averagechump
6 years ago

I appreciate the detailed, honest feedback. If white-knighting makes you feel like more of a badass and helps you get laid with Kitten I say go for it!

Good luck with the baby duck,
@averagechumpboy

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

Heh Average Stop being a dick. No white knight here. I call them as I see them. You are not quite astute to understand that I am not sucking up to Kitten who happens to be the most appropriate women commenter I have seen in awhile. As attuned to trying to keep up with the flow as any. With the emphasis on trying. (And she shouldn’t try hard to qualify to the commenters here, she has done fine so far. To her: Don’t qualify. Be real. We will tear you apart if you don’t have a clue who your audience… Read more »

averagechump
6 years ago

@SJF Badass comment. A lot of good AMOG stuff in their buddy. You’re a real AMOG yourself. What I thinks most badass about you is that you say “No white knight here. I call them as I see them” – then you continue to go about white-knighting like its what your father bred you for. That’s some good Game. I forget which manosphere overlord advocated sucking up to women you do not know and who do not care about you? – Was it Roissy? – maybe Roosh? – You’ll have to remind me since your so good at it. “I… Read more »

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

Umm.

Hey?.

Sir.

Can we help you?

averagechump
6 years ago

@NeighborhoodBadassSJF

Nah. No help needed at the moment

Kitten Holiday
6 years ago
Reply to  averagechump

All, I would have responded sooner after reading Averagechump’s comments but I only had my phone with me until today and then I had to stop in the middle of writing to make lunch and figure out how to record the football game for my boyfriend. I appreciate the concern for how I would respond to Averagechumps comments. It’s a reflection of the caliber of men here that they would say something to reassure me that you are all not like him. Thank you. However, I do want to reassure you that you don’t need to worry about me in… Read more »

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

@ K.H. That book came out in 1997 and when I read it originally over a decade ago I was pissed that it took a better man than I was at the time to actually just get it and use it for relationship power. I’m much better now and it is eerie how proto-typically red pill it is with it’s illustration of a man’s way, dealing with women, working with masculine–feminine polarity, what women really want, a man’s dark side (which is really not so bad, as long as a man understands it) and how a man can use feminine… Read more »

Kate Minter
6 years ago

Fuck off, Kitten. You are deluding yourself if you think you are in any way, shape, or form part of the solution. You are a terrible role model to other women and to your children. You’re a slut who shows no intention of marrying and conducting yourself like a respectable woman. This is a board for men who’ve been battered by cunts like you and here you come to steal attention, gather readers, and followers. You think it’s all about you? Well, not here, bitch. It’s about them. So sit back, shut up, and stop embarrassing womankind.

Forge the Sky
Forge the Sky
6 years ago

comment image

averagechump
6 years ago

@Kittens That was a really good comment. Here are a few things for you to consider: (1) This is the internet. (2) You are taking your “red-pill awakening” way too seriously. (3) I don’t know Rollo personally. So it wouldn’t matter if I was in his favor or not. (4) You are a women who destroyed her family and gleefully got away with it – that makes you a shit person and a feminist success story. period. Nothing you do or say can change that. You lived like a feminist then and you live like a feminist now. All I’m… Read more »

Kitten Holiday
6 years ago
Reply to  averagechump

@Averagechump (2) You are taking your “red-pill awakening” way too seriously. – Learning to see reality vs. delusion saved my life in no uncertain terms. I know my life has no value to you, but it means a lot to me. I’m not taking it seriously enough. (4) You are a women who destroyed her family and gleefully got away with it – that makes you a shit person and a feminist success story. period. Nothing you do or say can change that. You lived like a feminist then and you live like a feminist now. All I’m saying is… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
6 years ago
stuffinbox
6 years ago

@Forge
haAHHHHhhhhhhhhhaaaahgghaaauuuuuha

Forge the Sky
Forge the Sky
6 years ago

Just in the abstract, re: white knighting It should be a term of description rather than of condemnation. Otherwise it just becomes a way to beat someone down who’s not acting how you want. Like, if I think a dude is genuinely white knighting I might tell him to cut it out – not because it offends me or anything but because it’s unproductive behavior that a lot of guys don’t even really recognize that they’re doing. Supporting a female commenter’s point, or opposing its criticism, doesn’t have to be white knighting. Showing compassion for a woman isn’t white knighting.… Read more »

averagechump
6 years ago

@Forge the Sky

I see what you mean. It is a fine line I am walking.

Pinelero
Pinelero
6 years ago

“4) You are a women who destroyed her family and gleefully got away with it – that makes you a shit person and a feminist success story. period. Nothing you do or say can change that. You lived like a feminist then and you live like a feminist now.”

Yeah this is hard to swallow and trust that you have honorable intentions, but maybe a reformed Eat, prey, lover is a good spokesperson. The real question is for what end.

bob bitchin
bob bitchin
6 years ago

The Inverse Picard Law applies: disengage.

Some broad shows up here, blathers, babbles, etc. Wash, rinse, repeat. ZFG. Big yawn.

I guess some like to vent. I see it as an unwanted intrusion into male-space. Is there nowhere for us to be together?
Time to stop falling for Divide et Impera guys.

Where’s scribb? I want him to come in and go nuclear on this broad.

kfg
kfg
6 years ago

@Kate:

Et tu.

Andy
Andy
6 years ago

@averagechump

Hey man, worse things are going to happen in life than your parents getting divorced. You’re young, smart, and you found game. You have your whole life ahead of you. I think a lot of people here would envy your position. Cheer up. 🙂

averagechump
6 years ago

@Andy I do not mean any disrespect but I do not see anything wrong with being justifiably angry. Bad things that happen in the future do not cloud over or justify or erase the bad things that happen in the past. There are certainly things in life to be happy about, such as coming across this community, going to a good school, having food and shelter, etc – I am definitely thankful for these things; but there are also many things to be very angry about as well. Happiness is useful in some things, not useful in others. I would… Read more »

kfg
kfg
6 years ago

Anger is not a cherished possession to hold onto and treasure. It’s purpose is to drive you to action that relieves you of it.

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

@Average chump. Your situation has been discussed many times here and If you haven’t seen the essay “The Five Stages of Unplugging” from Rollo’s best essays of Year One. (in fact you should read all of Rollo’s essays under the heading of Unplugging from the best of the First year). And read the Wikipedia article about Kubler-Ross stages of grief over loss (in most cases a loss of agency– the capacity, condition, or state of acting or of exerting power. Unfortunately, this discussion of Kubler-Ross stages of grief is getting a little cliched and repetitive and it is a tired… Read more »

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

And one of these days I may one day actually have the skill to pare down my run on comments to two sentences like KFG.

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

Or at least put that last sentence together properly.

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

I have a dream……..

Kitten Holiday
6 years ago

Dream, hobby, potato, potahto.

Kitten Holiday
6 years ago

Was referring to me with the dream /hobby comment. Yours posted right after my reply. Still catching up on these emails.

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

K.H.

That was “I have a Dream” meant for chumpie on MLK day. That one day he will see he has agency.

Your comment snuck in before I hit post comment. Relax, you’re doing fine here.

Kate Minter
6 years ago

Rollo,
I assume you are aware that Kitten Holiday is preparing herself to be the face of Roosh’s neofemininity? Her presence suggests you are okay with letting her steal your content so she and Roosh can profit from it…

Kate Minter
6 years ago
Reply to  Rollo Tomassi

You’re welcome.

Kitten Holiday
6 years ago
Reply to  Kate Minter

That’s a hell of a story to read into a couple tweets. Quite the active imagination you have.

Kitten Holiday
6 years ago
Reply to  Rollo Tomassi

Ridiculous. But at least now I know not to waste any more of my time and energy here.

Kate Minter
6 years ago
Reply to  Kitten Holiday

Nah, I just know a climber when I see one, and you’ve been busy finding a way to worm yourself in since summer. Not quite sure how either you or Roosh is going lead your readers anywhere but over a cliff considering you are both failures at relationships. C’ya! 🙂

Kate Minter
6 years ago

Btw: still married. Will be setting up trust funds for Mark’s kids soon. Top that motherfuckers 🙂

Kate Minter
6 years ago
Reply to  Rollo Tomassi

I didn’t lie about not being able to post. I tried several times, with and without links. Given our differences, it was not an illogical leap to assume I had been banned.

averagechump
6 years ago

@kfg I agree. @SJF I have read over the Five Stages of Unplugging many times and am very well acquainted with all of them. Above I mentioned that what defines Alphaness is one of the many debated aspects of the manosphere. Likewise — and I don’t want to get into the details of it — but I would say the content that the Five Stages covers is debatable as well. It definitely covers very important things, but certainly not everything. “What this blog is all about is having awareness of how things are and then developing tactics to have more… Read more »

jackmurphylive
jackmurphylive
6 years ago

Kate Minter, like Mark Minter? If so, isn’t she the original anit-feminist red pill attention whore?

Kate Minter
6 years ago

You mean the Kate Minter who gave her ex a 140K divorce settlement, who agreed to accept hundreds less than required in child support each month, whose child sees her father every other day because he lives across the street, who married a man even when he was penniless, who wrote quality posts for the AVFM forum about child custody laws, who now supports her husband and saves money from her teacher’s salary to give to step-children she’s never met. And who has never sought to profit and exploit her inadvertent “fame.” Yeah, that Kate Minter. Accept no substitutes. M’out.… Read more »

jackmurphylive
jackmurphylive
6 years ago

LOL you cashed in your “fame” by marrying Marriage Hating Mark. Honey, you were the harbinger of the end of the manosphere. I don’t think you’ve got much cred when trying to call out other women. LULZ.

Kate Minter
6 years ago

I’ll let Rollo be the judge of that.

jackmurphylive
jackmurphylive
6 years ago

My mistake. My old man memory must have failed me. I apologize for being rude. I’m happy to delete that if I could.

benfromtexas
benfromtexas
6 years ago

This post hurts my brain.

keyser Soze
keyser Soze
6 years ago

@kitten,
And do tell your hypocrite Muslim friend to shut his fucking mouth and stop attacking migration and refugees, because if the west had listened to his bullshits, his Muslim family would have stayed in the Islamic Republic of Iran and his blogs name would have been : bang Ayatollah Fucking Darius.
I tell you, the fucking hypocrisy that comes out of that guy’s ass.

averagechump
6 years ago

Kittens Wait!

Before you go, check out this link: http://www.smith-wesson.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/Category3_750001_750051_757751_-1_Y

There’s a lot of good stuff in there. Do your research first.

averagechump
6 years ago
Pellaeon
Pellaeon
6 years ago

@YaReally Hey sorry for how long it’s taken me to respond. I hope you haven’t lost interest in chatting with me. I did study mystery method, it was one of the first things I studied back in college (after David DeAngelo). I absorbed the idea of the structure fairly well, but I resisted learning routines (my mind is very good with abstract concepts, but not great with concrete implementation). I’ve just always felt more comfortable winging my speeches in class and in competition than I have trying to sit down and memorize a pre-canned script. My sets have clearly suffered… Read more »

trackback

[…] The Red Pill Balance […]

5k40
5k40
3 years ago

Request for clarification, please, Rollo:

“If a man’s vulnerability is ever it’s because his display of it is so uncharacteristic of his normal impenetrability.”

Is ever… what? It seems there’s something missing from this sentence, something important, and I’d like to fill in the gap, for my own understanding.

Thank you.

5k40
5k40
3 years ago
Reply to  Rollo Tomassi

Ah… I should have seen that. Thanks very much for taking the time to fill in the blank for me.

1 6 7 8
807
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x
%d bloggers like this: