Past Indiscretions


Now that the 21 Convention, 2018, is in the history books it’s time to get back to actually exploring intersexual dynamics rather that talking about exploring them. My speech this year was about the state of the Manosphere and what we can expect from an ever expanding, ever more power-ravenous, Gynocracy in the MeToo era. It’s never been a more dangerous time to be a man who reveals the truths about intersexual dynamics than now. Even if you do so from the most objective perspective you run the risk of censure at best, personal destruction at worst.

One thing I am very thankful of the convention for is the depth and breadth of not just the speakers, but the attendees. Last year I came back with so many new concepts to explore it finished out my year of blog essays. This year the attendance was twice as big and I’ve got a wealth of new material to dig into courtesy of the stories and personal situations men would relate to me. I’ll be doing a more complete breakdown of the convention around the time the video of my talk drops on 21 University. Anthony Johnson has fast tracked this video as well as the Red Man Group Live discussions (there were 3) we did on the bonus 5th day for anyone who stuck around for it.

One of the stories I had a guy hit me with was his making me aware of the black market that’s opened up in the sale of positive pregnancy tests online. There are forums (not even on the dark web) dedicated to convincing “commitment-phobic” men that their girlfriends are pregnant in order to lock them down either in marriage or an LTR. That blackmarket (if you can call it that) also led me to investigating the phenomenon of women covering for their girlfriends’ infidelity or pretending to be an alibi in order to allay any suspicions their Beta boyfriends might have about it. This then led me to another truth about the nature of women:

The Sisterhood will always show solidarity for, provide cover for, or aid and abet a woman trying to optimize Hypergamy,…unless that woman is in direct intrasexual competition with her for the same optimization.

Right now I’m sure there are guys thinking, “Rollo, we know that women can get really brutal when it comes to competing with each other.” And yes that is true; “slut shaming” is almost entirely reserved for women’s intrasexual combat, and there are many other ways women disqualify other women from the sexual marketplace if they feel threatened by that woman’s direct competition. But women evolved to be collectivist and cooperative in our hunter/gatherer past, and this has given rise to a globalized Sisterhood wherein women buy into the narrative of their own victimhood and most understand their gynocentric position of power simultaneously. If there is a prime directive to the social order it’s that all women everywhere are entitled to the best available opportunities to optimize Hypergamy.

Women will almost universally run cover for their sisters’ infidelity, and especially so if they are anonymous and there is little risk attached to their involvement. The rationalization is always the same too; it’s men’s responsibility to “Man Up” and marry a sister and thus subterfuge is justified, or, a woman deserves a shot at hot short term sexual opportunities if that woman is paired with a Beta partner. Either scenario is consolidation of Hypergamy.

Men are never afforded the same luxury of being able to vet women or to abandon one for his own reasons. I constantly get questions from guys asking how to vet a woman for marriage, but the fact that I would be audacious enough to offer advice on this is enough to set most women off. How dare I think that any woman might not be suitable for a long term commitment? To the Sisterhood, that vetting is only ever valid when it comes from another woman, why? Because to women only women should ever have control over Hypergamy and sexual selection. And in a feminine-primary social order a man telling another man that he should pass on a woman for commitment is conflated with misogyny.

Case in point, this story is of a guy who discovers his girlfriend used to be a Sugar Baby and had sex with older men for money in her sexual past. He has plans to break it off with her, but naturally every woman and every Blue Pill simp in the thread thinks he throwing the baby out with the bathwater. This situation isn’t all that uncommon. In fact, with the rise of the internet and a permanent social media digital footprint, combined with Open Hypergamy, it’s become necessary for women to legitimize every woman’s sexual past for fear that their own might disqualify her for a man’s commitment.

So the Sisterhood will cover for infidelity, aid in fraud and deception, keep Beta men ignorant of a woman’s duplicity and support single motherhood if it means that woman can lock down an optimal ideal of Hypergamy or parental investment from a man.

In an age when a woman’s sexual past is part of her digital footprint, a new social convention is needed to absolve her from any preconditions a man may have in vetting her out of his long term investment in her. Solution: Shame men for “judging” her by that sexual history. Men must be shamed as “insecure in their masculinity” if they might ever use a woman’s Party Years against her in a court of marriage. Likewise, women will fall back on the old tropes of traditionalist sexual repression to amp up the victimhood should a man ‘have a problem’ with women’s maturing sexual natures.

A similar situation occurred with the guy in Saving the Best who discovered that his sexually unadventurous wife had some video tapes of herself in amateur porn gangbangs when she “used to be so wild back in college.” His response was Great, I married a slut who fucks me like a prude. This of course sent the Sisterhood apoplectic and he was the one who had the “problem” for committing to and marrying a woman with that kind of past. That he had no knowledge of the videos prior to it made no difference; how dare he judge a woman’s past indiscretions? And then it became and indictment of womankind rather than an indictment of a woman. Men are not allowed to have concerns about a woman’s sexual past when it comes to matters of commitment because it implies a measure of control over Hypergamy.

Long term provisioning is a very serious problem for women’s subconscious Hypergamy. As it stands today a woman’s Epiphany Phase represents the culmination of Hypergamy. It’s vitally important that a woman never be judged for her sexual past if she’s to ever ‘stick the landing’ so to speak. If she follows the Sandbergian plan of Hypergamy she can’t afford to have men judge her for prioritizing Alpha Fucks, short term breeding, in her peak sexual market value years if she’s going to lock down a (hopefully still ignorant) Beta in Waiting. She must stick the landing and cash out of the sexual marketplace just at the right moment, between the ages of 29-31.

During her Epiphany Phase a woman needs to be absolved the ‘indiscretions’ of her Party Years. I’m putting indiscretions in scare quotes because those behaviors are really part of a long term breeding and life strategy. They are anything but indiscretions, they are part of the design.

However, most men have a natural revulsion to women who’ve been with a lot of men. It’s takes a great deal of social conditioning – a lifetime of Blue Pill conditioning – to prepare a man to believe it’s his duty as a man to look past what his instinct is trying to warn him about parentally investing in a woman for whom his paternity might be in doubt. I wrote about this in the War on Paternity, but there is a part of men’s evolved mental firmware that is instinctually suspicious of the certainty of paternity. Our hindbrains want to warn us of bad prospects for a certain paternity with a woman.


You’ll notice here that a higher partner count for men is less deleterious than it is for women. I’ll address this fact in a followup to this essay, but for now let’s focus on the effects a higher N-count has for women. Our instinct, it seems, is correct when it warns us that a woman isn’t suitable for a man’s parental investment.

Women with a higher number of sexual partners have more difficulty developing solid attachments, a higher incidence of infidelity and higher rates of divorce. Primarily I see this as being due to the Alpha Widow potential (more lovers, more chance one makes a lasting Alpha impression) and the subconscious comparisons to a past lover. This is a workable theory as to why men adapted for a revulsion (or at least a hesitation) of high N-count women.

This instinctual reservation is a survival adaptation based in men’s need for certainty in paternity. Investment costs and a loss of reproductive opportunity is so high for men in a state of paired monogamy that certainty of paternity became an evolved mental subroutine for men. Men’s biological imperative is to spread seed. This is why we can become aroused on a moment’s stimulation, why we can mentally compartmentalize sex from intimacy, and why we generally err on the side of over-estimating sexual interest in women.

Long term monogamous investment in rearing a child costs a man more than just him following his biological imperative. As such, a certainty of paternity became a key element in that tradeoff for parental investment in a woman. So when women shame a man for even thinking that her sexual past might be indicative of future returns it is literally a woman’s attempt at getting a man to ignore 100,000 years of an evolution that led his ancestors to have him. You don’t just wish away 100,000 years of successful breeding adaptations because it’s impolite for a man to question a woman’s past or the convenience with which she disregards it at a time when her own sexual strategy might benefit most.

This tradeoff exists in direct oppositional conflict with women’s Hypergamy, and in the context of her very limited sexual market value (fertility) peak. Women between 29 and 31 are on the downside of their sexual marketability with respect to locking down a high value man for long term parental investment. While some women can maintain their sexual value longer than others, the decay is undeniably on the downturn with respect to her intrasexual competition and her reproductive viability. She’s gone through her best fertility years focusing most on the visceral side of the Hypergamous equation (short term Alpha seed) and / or investing herself in low ROI monogamy.

In the Epiphany Phase she (and the Sisterhood) knows she can’t afford suitable Beta provisioning men to have revelations about her sexual past affect her viability for long term security.

Hypergamy is in conflict with the male need for certainty of paternity.

As such, the Sisterhood (and its male ‘allies’) unites against any reservations, or shames men for being ‘judgmental’ of her sexual past. This is how Hypergamy fights with men’s paternity imperative. Ultimately it’s a battle of his resources (sunk cost investment) versus her capacity to optimize Alpha Fucks and Beta Bucks. For more information on this conflict see The Cardinal Rule of Sexual Strategies.

Thus, social conventions must be created to prioritize Hypergamy above Paternity. So, being a Step-Dad makes a man a “hero”. Paternity is legally defined by the mother / wife, and gynocentric legal and medical doctrines restrict doctors from revealing who the real father of a child is to the “dad”. There was a time when being an unwed mother was something society shunned. It was a time when both men and women agreed on a man’s priority of his own paternity. If a young woman became pregnant out of marriage, or if a woman slept with a soldier of an invading army, she was shunned and publicly excoriated. That’s the degree of importance the social order of the time placed on paternity. Now, the Village shames men for ever expecting a child would be his own or that he’d be justified in his concern about a woman’s past.

Now the Village conflates men’s instinctual desire to know paternity (to even put a value on it) with a social construct. It’s not that he’s naturally concerned about paternity, it’s that he learned to be concerned as part of his toxic masculinity social educations.

Finally, I should also add that part of this social convention meant to repress the paternity imperative is about absolving women of the liabilities of a promiscuous past. As I mentioned, men’s reservations inhibit women’s Hypergamous strategies. So men are shamed by women for those reservations, but they are also shamed by Beta male sympathizers (symps). This piling on with the women only aids in the deconstruction of their ow sexual imperatives, but male ‘allies’ used this shame as an extension of their Beta Game in the hopes of identifying themselves better with the feminine (as they were conditioned to). They see the identifying with women’s imperatives as a means to their own reproduction.


  1. Oh boy…

    I’ve learned via J that autism can be learned. I’m finding out now that retardism can also be learned…

    Silver Fox


    i’m Dynamic, Passionate & Authentic as Sentient bangs on about

    Well i’d question the Authentic part, but regardless… despite your living in the middle of nowhere you’ve demonstrated over the last year on several occasions that women were attracted to you. Which you proceed to royally fuck up with your needy beta game…

    So we see that the Alpha Triad traits – demonstrations of what is Alpha, and Alpha being universally attractive to women – is…. wait for it…. Attractive to women!

    But can also be undone by acting like a chode… whaaaaa!!!!


    j ain’t getting laid on the regular.

    Nah he is… J’s problem is a) limited intellect and b) massive ego investment. He is also just scratching the surface of game (clubs bars after midnight) but doesn’t realize it yet… and overstates what the girls look like. [Autist disclaimer – I personally don’t care what the girls look like, it’s the ego investment in overstating it that’s the issue]

    This Lendhispeaks creature is something else… Game denier seeking confirmation bias.

    On so called men on these forums…

    YSG – “No OMG’s are even going out and trying to bang girls”

    Sentient – Raises hand – “not true…”

    YSG – “Well you aren’t banging them”

    Sentient – FR of bang as example.

    YSG – “Well these aren’t hot tight Under 24 8+s… so doesn’t count”

    Sentient – FR of 22 YO actual real life 8, stripper bang.

    YSG – “No guys over 50 are pulling”

    Sentient – “not true”

    YSG – “Yeah you only post makeouts!!!”

    Sentient – “Not true”

    YSG – “Yeah but you posted a FR where you didn’t bang!”

    Sentient – “yup”

    OSG – “well it doesn’t matter because if you also have a wife it doesn’t count!!!”

    Sentient – “ummmm?”

    YSG/OSG – ‘Well women over XX are flabby and wrinkled and ugly!!!”

    Sentient – “Not all of ’em…”

    OSG – ” No old guys are out pulling”

    Sentient “Oh for FFS…”

    commences head shaking

  2. “Or are we not allowed to talk about that?”

    heartiste is a good place for that if you like that sort of discussion

  3. Blax

    Dilly Dilly!

    Repeat after me, if a man can’t locate and talk to a woman, he shall have no sex. None of the men I know even know what pua is. Never heard of it. But I’d bet my left nut that if they had a kind to explain shit, they could, and I’d also get that like with 80% of guys that try to learn pickup, most of explaining wouldn’t really help.

  4. @ j

    Two questions:

    How many sex encounters have you had in the past month?

    Did you have sex yesterday?

  5. Disgruntled Earthling

    SJF: “Did I mention earlier that two older charming men I just met are really happy with women they just met. Their girlfriends are really charming and quite attractive. They are not 19 to 25.

    Maybe you should invest in a Pickup Artist course. And hit up bar sluts that are DTF. If that is your objective.”

    DE: “This is where I have a problem with your OMG attitude. It’s not a matter of Madonna/Whore as implied by your statement (that’s what I read into it). Why not entertain the possibility of meeting a ‘nice’ 19-25yo rather than an age-appropriate ‘nice’ 45 yo?”

    I don’t believe in operating in a madonna/whore sphere. Madonna/whore is a defect in AFC’s brains that distinguishes a difference in different women. It’s not healthy way for you brain.

    Think about what it really is you want when you move to the city. If I were single, I’d certainly target any and all demographic of women. The thing about it is for us OMG’s that are thinking clearly and getting laid regularly is that we interact socially with all age groups. And after 40 we have lots more than pussy only to chase. Including our professional jobs, hobbies, family, children, tribal goal directed get togethers with other men. Intellectual pursuits. Physical activities, sports and adventures…

    Targeting 19 to 35 when you are forty or fifty is indeed an admirable goal. And shouldn’t be dismissed out of hand. But do you, Disgruntled Earthling want to go around bar hopping and getting the low hanging fruit? Do you think that you can be in a AF mindset and pull these girls. Then what? Pull one after another, sex once a week, twice a week, three times a week? Or do you think you can pull one with Beta Bucks and have sex once, twice, three times a week?

    Nothing wrong with a transitioning period of doing whatever you can get away with. I’m not down on any man pursuing beauty and 19 to 25, every unhappy man is unhappy in his own way, every happy man is all the same. Do what you can do. But with all adventures, there is being realistic and objective about your prospects.

    Scribbler had to give up on his soul’s desire to have an attractive LTR that was into him. That’s still what most 57 year olds want. Without the drama of dealing with a feral animal.

    And I got nothing bad to say about getting an SB. In my book that is a very attractive proposition if you aren’t getting regular sex.

    Oh, and You’ll have to pardon my biases. 90% of successful men I know and associate with and see as patients are in LTR, (monogamous or not). And you can read their body language and subcommunications. You can tell the happy men and the unhappy men. Look at the Red Man Group guys for inspiration. Half of those participants are in a LTR, half are not. All can be “read” as happy. IOW, I’d take an LTR with an attractive woman any day of the week. I’m biased. That doesn’t mean we can’t have a discussion among different men to swap notes and ideas. The goal is to achieve your goals. Not someone else’s. And if not, have a backup plan. I don’t believe in settling, but I do believe in backup plans at times.

  6. YSG/OSG – ‘Well women over XX are flabby and wrinkled and ugly!!!”

    Sentient – “Not all of ’em…”

    SJF: “Not all of them”

    And the ones that aren’t flabby and wrinkled are taken by quality men. Do you read the underlying message there? The underlying message is that you should have your mind be operating in a Pareto distribution world and actually read Rollo’s second book while you are doing that. Rollo wrote that book for men, not for women. It is descriptive of how women are at different timelines.

  7. So the premise is there are women out there without “party years”? Interesting. Don’t marry any of them.

  8. Believe it or not, there are quite a few chicks out there that didn’t have ‘ party years ‘ and never went near a cock carousel.

    a lot of that talk is high speed buffering based on … I’m not really sure what. Where a man hunts will be determinative of the game he bags. You will not get an elk whilst in hip waders with a fly rod.

    Not the elk’s fault.

  9. “So the premise is there are women out there without “party years”? Interesting. Don’t marry any of them.”

    That’s where the madonna/whore complex is residing. In Is Thing On?’s head.

  10. Chapter 4 of The Laws of Human Behavior:

    Determine the Strength of People’s Character

    The Law of Compulsive Behavior

    When choosing people to work and associate with, do not be mesmerized by their reputation or taken in by the surface image they try to project. Instead, train yourself to look deep within them and see their character. People’s character is formed in their earliest years and by their daily habits. It is what compels them to repeat certain actions in their lives and fall into negative patterns. Look closely at such patterns and remember that people never do something just once. They will inevitably repeat their behavior. Gauge the relative strength of their character by how well they handle adversity, their ability to adapt and work with other people, their patience and ability to learn. Always gravitate toward those who display signs of strength, and avoid the many toxic types out there. Know thoroughly your own character so you can break your compulsive patterns and take control of your destiny.

  11. I don’t think there are any girls in the millenial generation without “party years”. The n-count may vary but many have pornstar n-count. There is peer pressure among girls to have periodic rides on the carousel. The pressure is so big that they feel like losers if they don’t indulge into it. If they are locked in a LTR without being able to be out there optimising hypergamy.

  12. @Eh

    “How many sex encounters have you had in the past month?”

    Sure, let me pull out the stats sheet real quick

    From Oct 5- Oct 27 (going out every Fri/Sat), I fucked 6 new girls.

    “Did you have sex yesterday”

    Techically yes, cause I stayed over the girl I picked up from Saturday and fucked her in the morning. After I left her place I went home to watch football, while doing my laundry like an NPC 😉

  13. “You’ve got four or five guys all around 30 years old pushing a pram, going into a cafe, and having a latte.”

  14. Fox is struggling, and I really hate to see a man struggling.

    I have friends that have struggled later in life, and from what I’ve observed is that these men reached an Alex or peak ( in their heads ) earlier in life, and became mentally stuck there. They do what they’ve always done, but don’t get the same results or satisfaction. Blaming this scenario on age isn’t always the crux of the problem, but ‘ age ‘ is always touted as some kind of negative benchmark.

    Actually there are a number of reasons for older guys to flail about when trying to ‘ date ‘ younger, and I think the biggest factor is an inability to relate to younger people in general, or younger women specifically.

    If your social circle is only filled out with people your age or within a few years +/-, it will be harder to be relatable enough to younger people, especially younger women. It is possible to understand young folks without trying to act like them. But you’ll need to be around them more often, and not always/only with a specific agenda.

    Rollo alluded to this year’s ago, that raising daughters can give a man immeasurable insight into women, young and old.

    I guess I’d say the ” trick ” in life for older men is to not get too stuck. Don’t play the ‘ I used to be able to’ game. Yesterday is resolved and in the history books. No time machines available. Life is always happening right now, in this moment.

    There is no ‘ wall ‘ for men. The wall is purely mental. Don’t lean on it as an excuse. Remember that your mindset is plainly visible, even when you’re unaware. And please, never listen to anyone half your age concerning what you can and can’t do. They have no reference experience that is applicable. Particularly over the internet😀.

    Fox, when you woke up this morning, it wasn’t yesterday. Groundhog day is a funny movie, but it ain’t real. You’re not bound by yesterday or ‘ before ‘ unless you mentally volunteer to be so. As corny as it sounds, every day you wake up is an opportunity. Millions of people didn’t awaken today, millions won’t be alive at the end of today. Time, that shit doesn’t wait.

    A.20 year old has no idea about this.

    So c’mon man, LIVE!!!!! You’ve got absolutely nothing better or more worthwhile to do.

  15. @Sentient

    “Sentient – FR of 22 YO actual real life 8, stripper bang”

    Dang must have missed that one lol. Sorry bro!

  16. ” . . . it will take an exceptional fly rod to bring him down.”

    It’s not the rod, it’s what you do with it, but yeah, I’d probably want a salt water reel to hold enough backing.

  17. “Dang must have missed that one lol. Sorry bro!”

    You’ve missed a lot J. You haven’t been around very long.

    It shows.

  18. Orson

    You are speculating.

    Question: how many millennial women do you know? 2) are you getting your data from the internet?

    The average millennial is having less sex. That’s what I see also. But the social media drumbeat is very loud and very convincing.

    What does it do to a man to think like you’ve pronounced, especially if he isn’t a millennial and should posses more wisdom and knowledge?

  19. Sentient

    Re:latte dads 😂😂

    Man, I was only able to get through 2/3 of the article. Fuckin Sweden.

  20. “Believe it or not, there are quite a few chicks out there that didn’t have ‘ party years ‘ and never went near a cock carousel.”

    Exactly – I know several that are in the serial-ltr model. But who knows what they do in their private time away from bf? Not all girls this age are barsluts – thinking so is just a bad generalization. I myself have 2 girls – 19 and 23yo and they certainly don’t fit into that category.

    ” Don’t marry any of them.” – why on earth would a 50+yo man marry a <25yo? Maybe some of us are retarded I guess

  21. The average millennial is having less sex.

    The average millennial man is having less sex. The average millennial woman is having about the same amount as her older sisters.

    fify…don’t conflate men and women

  22. ” Don’t marry any of them.” – why on earth would a 50+yo man marry a <25yo?

    Who said they married because they wanted to? Hint: shotgun

  23. Asd

    Hang out with a lot of millennial chicks, do ya?

    ( Dancing isn’t applicable to the broader point in this instance)

  24. Blax, I chat with a fair number…of course my daughters aren’t millenials. But the bar scene is an indecent barometer of women, although it’s more pronounced…50 N-count isn’t exceptional.

  25. If all millennial chicks.went to bars regularly, bars would be the size of football stadiums.

  26. Blax, my point was that bars are a sampling of women. Of course not all women go to bars. My kids, for instance. Millennial women can often be seen in coffee shops. Malls. Dog parks. Church. A large percentage of millennial women are approaching the reproductive wall and are wanting to have kids and a family instead of casual sex–doesn’t necessarily include marriage. The younger millennial women (21-25 yo) are still riding the carousel.

  27. “Not all girls this age are barsluts – thinking so is just a bad generalization. I myself have 2 girls – 19 and 23yo and they certainly don’t fit into that category.”

    NAWALT/HQNP theory confirmed???

  28. J

    I know you’re trolling, but NAWALT isn’t applicable. Nobody is saying NAWALT, just that all women aren’t in bars/clubs, which is just a fact.

    The overwhelming percentage of women, or any age group, are not carousel riding bar chicks. The assertion is ridiculous on it’s face.

    But you knew that already ( I hope ).

  29. @DisgruntledEarthling

    props! on making the effort to improve your life!…

    The real issue is I myself need to open whatever is in front of me, regardless of gender. But there’s a difference in knowing and doing.

    that^^^ is true, but just to point this out (you probably know this already…lol)… knowing the path and walking the path are very different, but just understanding THAT concept (and accepting it) even before you actually take any action… puts you ahead of the vast majority of men in the world… let alone taking even SOME action to address that issue… and it does get easier, the more action you take…

    @SJF – Not much actually.

    DON’T discount your actual actions… THAT is the FI pushing on you… how many men do you actually know IRL that actually take action (any action) to make a conscious change to their situ?…serious question… and given THAT, what % of men are you actually in?… again serious question… (note – and when you think about that^^^ idea, your “natural” reticence to feel good about yourself is the FI’s hand on your shoulder…)

    I’m more social than I used to be at work.

    = action…

    Our company is divided between propeller-heads and sales. The two don’t mix but the sales guys are way more social and appealing to me these days – a mix of driven middle-eastern and Italian. I’ve been wondering how to get closer to them on a social level.

    how about starting on a business level?… if you are a “propeller-head” (and note the pejorative concept in THAT self-label… = the FI is cunning and pervasive… i keep stating it bc it’s true…), then maybe you could start talking to the sales guys about even just sitting in on some sales meetings… (“bc you want some better perspective on the company as a whole”)

    I hope my new situation in the city will open things up more. I’ve been going out eating alone since my kitchen is still mostly in boxes and trying to see the mingling opportunities there.

    props! on this… that shit ain’t easy!… and ESPECIALLY solo… feel GOOD about that action!… even just taking a step out your front door is a WIN!…

    But the world here seems to be filled up mostly with old redneck couples.

    just something for you to think about… is this^^^ bc of confirmation bias (where you are only ‘registering’/noticing those old couples… and ‘ignoring’/not seeing the younger girls?…) or bc it’s really true?…

    if it’s really true, you could try some different venues… if it’s a ‘city’, there’s MORE girls…lol… that’s just math… which a ‘propeller-head’ should be able to understand… right?…lol


    And hit up bar sluts that are DTF. If that is your objective.

    This is where I have a problem with your OMG attitude. It’s not a matter of Madonna/Whore as implied by your statement (that’s what I read into it). Why not entertain the possibility of meeting a ‘nice’ 19-25yo rather than an age-appropriate ‘nice’ 45 yo?

    the FI is cunning and pervasive… even for RP dudes…lol… it just slips in around the edges…

    again, props on taking action!…

    good luck!

  30. @Blaximus

    I know enough millenial women to draw some conclusions either from dating or social circle. I live in a metropolitan city and been involved in subcultures that draw a lot of youth.
    Millenial men are having less sex..not women! This generation of males will have the unfortunate dishonour of being remembered as the incel/cuckold generation lol.
    I can’t confirm what j calls “male wall” and have no ill intention to break down or hurt older guys here in any shape or form but younger females (males as well) are susceptible to the so called “ageism”. David Buss provides the data about how we perceive the ideal partner to be with a small ± age tolerance. I remember one occasion being in a company of millenial girls and one indirectly put me down by mentioning “a creepy 40 something guy” who tried to flirt with her and she said to me “I don’t know what he was thinking…and imagine he was OLDER THAN YOU” with me being just 35 and looking like 30!

  31. j,

    I have good and bad news.

    First, the good news: You beat 1:3 odds getting laid yesterday. Wow!

    Now, the bad: The bang probably never happened. Bummer!

    “The researchers surveyed over 40,000 people with standard alcohol survey questions about their quantity and frequency of alcohol consumption — “How many drinks have you had in the past month?” and so on. But in a smart twist, they then asked a more immediate question: “How many drinks did you have yesterday?” This method is useful for detecting under-reporting because of the improbabilities it reveals.”

    Moreover: “Younger drinkers under‐report alcohol consumption to a greater degree than do older drinkers, while low‐risk drinkers underestimate more than do medium and high‐risk drinkers.”

  32. “I went home to watch football, while doing my laundry like an NPC”

    something off about a man doing his own laundry

    his go suit in a bucket with campsuds is one thing

    watching tv and “doing laundry” like a woman is another

  33. David Buss provides the data about how we perceive the ideal partner to be with a small ± age tolerance.

    …based on what women say, not what they do…

    …the fact is, most guys will buy into this, but not men with high “mating intelligence”. (Apparently, psychologists now refer to players as men with high mating intelligence.)

    I remember one occasion being in a company of millenial girls and one indirectly put me down by mentioning “a creepy 40 something guy” who tried to flirt with her

    …that is what we in the manosphere refer to as a “shit test”…the girl was considering having sex with you and testing your suitability. Did you pass the test or did you take this as an insult or as her saying “no”?

  34. “David Buss provides the data about how we perceive the ideal partner to be . . .”

    Lesson to be learned: How badly our perceptions can be out of tune with our reality.

  35. Asd, you went to college, right?

    When I was in college, my dick ached from banging ‘ college chicks ‘ almost daily.

    College was never a microcosm of real life. Lot’s of folk peak in.their college years.

  36. “David Buss provides the data about how we perceive the ideal partner to be with a small ± age tolerance.”
    Yeah that’s funny.

  37. …. All young people 18-30 aren’t, firstly.

    …and we know that the young waitresses and hairdressers aren’t banging the truckers…trying to keep up with their college sisters…

    When I was in college, my dick ached from banging ‘ college chicks ‘ almost daily.

    Well, I only fucked one chick in college…we did it like rabbits…several times a day for five days…I don’t remember any achiness, lol….must have been the vitamins…you did remember to take your One-a-days, right?

    Lot’s of folk peak in.their college years.

    You always have the most entertaining punctuation.

  38. “I guess I’d say the ” trick ” in life for older men is to not get too stuck. Don’t play the ‘ I used to be able to’ game. ”

    Useter is a rooster with his head cut off.With women not only is there no relational equity,there is no historical equity either. It is always what can you do for her now. Rarely what have you done for me lately. The burden of performance never ends although the type of performance constantly changes.

  39. @Disgruntled Earthling

    Hey, have you thought more about how to go where the chicks are with the ongoing discussion?

    Have you thought about just changing up your routine. Have you thought about befriending some of those Italians, or even Middle Eastern’s (god forbid) to ask them how to get together with them?

    Have you thought about getting together with other guys to ask them for advice on you? (god forbid)?

    Have you thought about not being so insular?

    Have you thought about a bowling league, a dancing club (salsa lessons?), a handgun shooting league, after which you go smoke cigars and drink beers or bourbon (do you drink?), a Meetup in the New City on some topic you might like to socialize over?, go out and get something of peace with nature, kayaking, mountain biking, photography? Have you thought to go to a bar with a cute bartender girl and chat ( and make flirty talk, for which they are paid to do by your tips? They are fun and feminine. Pro tip: don’t go to places on the regular where the bartenders aren’t cute. Don’t think you can fuck them, they get paid to be nice. Just enjoy their fun, femininity and attractiveness…)

    BTW, what do you do besides work? What stories from the past five years do you have to tell?

    What Attraction Switches have you cultivated? Why do people like you? What do you have to offer them?

    Have you thought to ask a guy what he can do to help you, or what you can do to help him? And then expand out to do something once every two weeks or 4 weeks or 4 months? Form a tribe and talk about masculine strategy and how to get girls IRL?

    Have you thought about getting friends and forming a social circle? To get other friends and girls?

    Have you google searched “How to meet girls”?

    What do you know about yourself, your positive inclinations and where that can lead you? What are your negative qualities that cock-block you from meeting girls you want to be with? You’ve mentioned these in the past. What can you do to minimize these things.

    You aren’t going to change your nature that you have developed, but you can work with you and build on your social successes.

    Did I mention Robert Greene’s new book is good?

    He builds upon a leadup (Too Long to Paste) to the end of chapter 5 which is developing an aura that is attractive and just out of reach of people to intrigue them…whitch ends with:

    The Supreme Desire

    Our path must always be toward greater awareness of our nature. We must see within ourselves the grass-is-always-greener syndrome at work and how it continually impels us to certain actions. We need to be able to distinguish between what is positive and productive in our covetous tendencies and what is negative and counterproductive. On the positive side, feeling restless and discontented can motivate us to search for something better and to not settle for what we have. It enlarges our imagination as we consider other possibilities instead of the circumstances we face. As we get older, we tend to become more complacent, and renewing the restlessness of our earlier years can keep us youthful and our minds active.

    This restlessness, however, must be under conscious control. Often our discontent is merely chronic; our desire for change is vague and a reflection of our boredom. This leads to a waste of precious time. We are unhappy with the way our career is going and so we make a big change, which requires learning new skills and acquiring new contacts. We enjoy the newness of it all. But several years later we again feel the stirring of discontent. This new path isn’t right either. We would have been better off thinking about this more deeply, homing in on those aspects of our previous career that did not click and trying for a more gentle change, choosing a line of work related to the previous one but requiring an adaptation of our skills.

    With relationships, we can spend our life searching for the perfect man or woman and end up largely alone. There is nobody perfect. Instead, it is better to come to terms with the flaws of the other person and accept them or even find some charm in their weaknesses. Calming down our covetous desires, we can then learn the arts of compromise and how to make a relationship work, which never come easily or naturally.

    Instead of constantly chasing after the latest trends and modeling our desires on what others find exciting, we should spend our time getting to know our own tastes and desires better, so that we can distinguish what is something we truly need or want from that which has been manufactured by advertisers or viral effects.

    Life is short and we have only so much energy. Led by our covetous desires, we can waste so much time in futile searches and changes. In general, do not constantly wait and hope for something better, but rather make the most of what you have.

    Consider it this way: You are embedded in an environment that consists of the people you know and the places you frequent. This is your reality. Your mind is being continually drawn far away from this reality, because of human nature. You dream of traveling to exotic places, but if you go there, you merely drag with you your own discontented frame of mind. You search for entertainment that will bring you new fantasies to feed upon. You read books filled with ideas that have no relation to your daily life, that are full of empty speculations about things that only half exist. And none of this turmoil and ceaseless desire for what is most distant ever leads to anything fulfilling—it only stirs up more chimeras to pursue. In the end you cannot escape from yourself.

    On the other hand, reality beckons you. To absorb your mind in what is nearest, instead of most distant, brings a much different feeling. With the people in your circle, you can always connect on a deeper level. There is much you will never know about the people you deal with, and this can be a source of endless fascination. You can connect more deeply to your environment. The place where you live has a deep history that you can immerse yourself in. Knowing your environment better will present many opportunities for power. As for yourself, you have mysterious corners you can never fully understand. In trying to know yourself better, you can take charge of your own nature instead of being a slave to it. And your work has endless possibilities for improvement and innovation, endless challenges for the imagination. These are the things that are closest to you and compose your real, not virtual world.

    In the end what you really must covet is a deeper relationship to reality, which will bring you calmness, focus, and practical powers to alter what it is possible to alter.

    “It is advisable to let everyone of your acquaintance—whether man or woman—feel now and then that you could very well dispense with their company. This will consolidate friendship. Nay, with most people there will be no harm in occasionally mixing a grain of disdain with your treatment of them; that will make them value your friendship all the more. . . . But if we really think very highly of a person, we should conceal it from him like a crime. This is not a very gratifying thing to do, but it is right. Why, a dog will not bear being treated too kindly, let alone a man!”
    —Arthur Schopenhauer

  40. We continue to circle the drain, saw a “woke” milenial guy spend most of his soliciting donations at the cafeteria for breast cancer to please an HB4 Indian IT woman who is running the campaign, he thinks it will get him the P, these millennial guys are getting used left and right.

  41. “Gab has spent the past 48 hours proudly working with the DOJ and FBI to bring justice to an alleged terrorist. Because of the data we provided, they now have plenty of evidence for their case. In the midst of this Gab has been no-platformed by essential internet infrastructure providers at every level. We are the most censored, smeared, and no-platformed startup in history, which means we are a threat to the media and to the Silicon Valley Oligarchy.

    Gab isn’t going anywhere.

    It doesn’t matter what you write. It doesn’t matter what the sophist talking heads say on TV. It doesn’t matter what verified nobodies say on Twitter. We have plenty of options, resources, and support. We will exercise every possible avenue to keep Gab online and defend free speech and individual liberty for all people.

    You have all just made Gab a nationally recognized brand as the home of free speech online at a time when Silicon Valley is stifling political speech they disagree with to interfere in a US election.

    The internet is not reality. TV is not reality. 80% of normal everyday people agree with Gab and support free expression and liberty. The online outrage mob and mainstream media spin machine are the minority opinion. People are waking up, so please keep pointing the finger at a social network instead of pointing the finger at the alleged shooter who holds sole responsibility for his actions.

    No-platform us all you want. Ban us all you want. Smear us all you want.

    You can’t stop an idea.

    As we transition to a new hosting provider Gab will be inaccessible for a period of time. We are working around the clock to get back online. Thank you and remember to speak freely.

    Andrew Torba, CEO”

  42. Re: Fleezer – Fuck, he’s right again. I don’t do laundry. I drop it off and have it done for me. I just refuse to do it. And I don’t even own a tv…I sold it to some Guatemalan dude for 300 bux.

  43. Not all of these past indiscretions are true and some are made up for attracting attention (solipsism and ego). This study of #metoo tweets by a researchers shows that women have true stories but some others have made up or just outright plagiarized metoo stories. The made up tweets were ~50%! Maybe no men were harmed during these fake me2 recollections, but who knows since they were not supreme court nominees.

  44. Gonna leave this right here just in case the @scribblerg drops into this thread again and missed it earlier 🙂

    October 27, 2018 at 11:52 am

    As @palmasailor referenced @Sentient saying a while back way up the thread “the biggest problem is getting yourself (an over 40’s male) in their (a 19-25 year old females) proximity.”

    The parenthesis are mine to add clarity to the statement this far down the thread.

    My question is for the older single guys (@scribblerg specifically but others jump in as well) where exactly are you meeting 19-25 year old females? Spare me any of the you just go through life and meet them rhetoric if that’s where you’re gonna take it. I’m looking for specifics here. Like a list of where/how you met the last five 19-25 year olds you were with.

    Sorry married guys I’m not interested in your opinions here since they often comes off as fantasy to me with a lot of what you perceive as IOI’s being nothing more than attention grabbing attempts from young women where if you were single and actually tried following up on them would lead you nowhere. And the married men that are actually getting younger women your opinions are skewed as well. Having your main squeeze at home to fall back on at the end of the day while attempting to pick up other girls is a completely different mindset than being single.”

  45. “Case in point, this story is of a guy who discovers his girlfriend used to be a Sugar Babyand had sex with older men for money in her sexual past. He has plans to break it off with her, but naturally every woman and every Blue Pill simp in the thread thinks he throwing the baby out with the bathwater. This situation isn’t all that uncommon. In fact, with the rise of the internet and a permanent social media digital footprint, combined with Open Hypergamy, it’s become necessary for women to legitimize every woman’s sexual past for fear that their own might disqualify her for a man’s commitment.”


  46. Haven’t read every comment on this post, so forgive me if I am repeating another post. On the subject of vetting, Dalrock had an excellent post on this July 10, 2010 “Interviewing a Prospective Wife Part II: Interview Questions”. First-class insight as usual from him. I sure could have used this info, I don’t know, say 35 years ago.

  47. This doesn’t sound fair though, like with the woman who used to date sugar daddies, that’s in the past, it should only matter if she is still in contact with them or still dating them

  48. “This doesn’t sound fair though . . .”

    Perhaps there is something amiss with your conception of fairness.

    ” . . . that’s in the past, it should only matter if she is still in contact with them . . .”

    If you cut off your leg today, you can’t complain tomorrow that you are missing a leg just because of past behavior. It is perfectly possible to take actions with negative consequences for the rest of your life, no matter your future behavior.

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