Thoughts on Aziz Ansari

I’m going to make a confession here; until a week ago I had no idea who Aziz Ansari was. I get he was some low limit comedian, and in today’s social environment that means he lectures an audience about social justice issues for an hour while trying to insert some humor into his act. I’ve pretty much given up on most comedians these days, and I’m a guy who used to love standup. However, my unfamiliarity with Aziz was actually a benefit in assessing his recent pillory in the mainstream. Had I known about him before all this, and his comedy activism, I likely would’ve just dismissed his case as the next guy to be put into the MeToo deadpool of celebrity men – and I’m being generous about the “celebrity” part.

I had actually resigned myself to blowing off his whole story until I started digging into the particulars of the ‘date’ he had with the anonymous “Grace”. On first pass this whole incident is easy to dismiss even for Red Pill aware men with better things to do than bother themselves with another Hollywood chump to go down to the open power grab that MeToo and TimesUp have become. There is, however, a lot to unpack in the whole thing though. If you want the whole story you can read about it here on, the blog for “Girls who don’t give a fuck”, which is interesting because apparently they give a lot of fucks according to the story.

Just to break down some of the particulars here:

  • She (Grace) approaches Aziz in the beginning. Flirts with him and then goes back to her date she was with that evening. They would catch each other glancing at the other durning the night (IOIs). They ‘ran into each other’ later and he number closes.
  • Aziz Beta texts her almost immediately and tries to text Game/flirt with her before he asks her out
  • Before meeting Ansari, she tells friends and coworkers about the date and consulted her go-to group chat about what she should wear to fit the “cocktail chic” dress-code he gave her. She settled on “a tank-top dress and jeans.” She showed me a picture, it was a good outfit.
  • After the white wine she didn’t like, they end up back at his place. She complimented his marble countertops. Ansari turned the compliment into an invitation. “He said something along the lines of, ‘How about you hop up and take a seat?’” Within moments, he was kissing her. “In a second, his hand was on my breast.” Then he was undressing her, then he undressed himself.
  • Ansari tells her he was going to get a condom within minutes of their first kiss, Grace voiced her hesitation explicitly. “I said something like, ‘Whoa, let’s relax for a sec, let’s chill.’” She says he then resumed kissing her, briefly performed oral sex on her, and asked her to do the same thing to him. She did, but not for long. “It was really quick. Everything was pretty much touched and done within ten minutes of hooking up, except for actual sex.”
  • Ansari repeatedly attempts ‘The Claw’. on her “The move he kept doing was taking his two fingers in a V-shape and putting them in my mouth, in my throat to wet his fingers, because the moment he’d stick his fingers in my throat he’d go straight for my vagina and try to finger me.” “It was 30 minutes of me getting up and moving and him following and sticking his fingers down my throat again. It was really repetitive. It felt like a fucking game.”
  • Ansari physically pulled her hand towards his penis multiple times throughout the night, from the time he first kissed her on the countertop onward. “He probably moved my hand to his dick five to seven times,” she said. “He really kept doing it after I moved it away.”
  • Ansari presses her for sex. He asks repeatedly, “Where do you want me to fuck you?” while she was on the countertop. She says she didn’t want to fuck him at all. He keeps asking, so she says, ‘Next time.’ Aziz says, ‘Oh, you mean second date?’ and she says, ‘Oh, yeah, sure,’ and he goes, ‘Well, if I poured you another glass of wine now, would it count as our second date?’
  • She later says she doesn’t want it to seem forced and this wakes Ansari up from his sexual stupor. “He said, ‘Oh, of course, it’s only fun if we’re both having fun. Let’s just chill over here on the couch.’ Ansari instructed her to turn around. “He sat back and pointed to his penis and motioned for me to go down on him. And I did. I think I just felt really pressured. It was literally the most unexpected thing I thought would happen at that moment because I told him I was uncomfortable.”
  • Halfway into the encounter, he led her from the couch to a different part of his apartment. He said he had to show her something. Then he brought her to a large mirror, bent her over and asked her again, “Where do you want me to fuck you? Do you want me to fuck you right here?” He rammed his penis against her ass while he said it, pantomiming intercourse.
  • They got dressed, sat side by side on the couch they’d already “chilled” on, and he turned on an episode of Seinfeld. While the TV played in the background, he kissed her again, stuck his fingers down her throat again, and moved to undo her pants. She turned away.  “I remember saying, ‘You guys are all the same, you guys are all the fucking same.’” Ansari asked her what she meant. When she turned to answer, she says he met her with “gross, forceful kisses.” After that last kiss, Grace stood up from the couch, moved back to the kitchen island where she left her phone, and said she would call herself a car. He hugged her and kissed her goodbye, another “aggressive” kiss. When she pulled away, Ansari finally relented and insisted he’d call her the car.

All of this detail is important to consider because Ansari’s actions here are classic Beta Game desperation tactics. It is literally one Beta move after another. Many of the reviewers of this incident like to point out that it was really a misunderstood date gone wrong, or else they use it as proof-positive of a sexual assault, but I’m going to argue something different here – Ansari is simply a Beta chump with very little Game savvy who, if he’d had even a hint of Game awareness could’ve had a good sexual experience both for himself and her.

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m not a proponent of men attempting to push past last minute resistance. For as much as “enthusiastic consent” will be used as a tool of fear to dissuade Beta men from even attempting to approach, I can’t say that I wouldn’t want a woman to have a genuine desire to fuck me in any sexual episode. I can remember in my ‘rock star 20s’ doing exactly this. If a woman wasn’t into having sex with me or she had some reservations or some hoops she expected me to jump through in order to get her to “come around” to fucking me I would simply excuse myself from the situation. I was at a point in my life where I had many other (proven) options, and if a new prospect wasn’t an absolutely ‘enthusiastic’  “Hell Yes!” girl I had at least six other women who were eager to come over and fuck me. This was just a subconscious awareness I took for granted at the time, but it was an attitude that stemmed from abundance.

That was essentially my Game back then. It was the natural reflex of an Alpha man and women responded to it. The behaviors and attitudes I exhibited just flowed from my unrehearsed subconscious. It was who I was. Dread is much more effective for a man when a woman sees that he’s oblivious to his causing dread.

Most men never really experience this kind of sexual abundance and as such it colors their outlook and how they expect sex to work for them. One big problem inherent to men’s Blue Pill conditioning is the idea that sex must be negotiated for a woman to feel comfortable enough to fuck a guy, but more importantly in this era, to avoid any misunderstandings that would lead to his getting a sexual misconduct allegation. The Blue Pill teaches men to respect women by default, for no other reason than she has a vagina, but also that open communication, full disclosure and negotiation are necessary elements of sex. We can see this played out in the ludicrous expectation that every sex action a man involves himself in requires vocal enthusiastic consent. This is the acculturation; men are expected to negotiate every sexual detail of a sexual experience.

Needless to say this is patently ridiculous, but it’s also the surest way to kill the actual enthusiasm a woman might actually have for a guy. One thing that will separate Alpha men from Betas in the future will be that man’s honed capacity to remove himself from any sexual situation that is negotiated. Women want to play the Game, they don’t want the Game explained to them. They want a man who Just Gets It and the men who don’t get it will be the ones whose dutiful Blue Pill conditioning prompts them to start any and every approach at intimacy by negotiating the terms for a woman’s desire.

You cannot negotiate genuine desire, but this negotiation is exactly what modern feminism simultaneously fosters and struggles against. The idea of ‘enthusiastic consent’ is really a want on the part of women to have the sex they genuinely have a desire to experience with a man. This is all women want to write about now and the Ansari incident is a textbook example of the kind of negotiated sex women don’t want to have, but sometimes go through with for transactional reasons. Remember, sex with Alpha men is validational for women – lackluster ‘meh’ sex with Beta men is transactional sex. If you only read what women are writing about sex today you’d think that transactional sex is all they’ve ever been having – and sexist men see women as ‘soft’ prostitutes. Now it’s suddenly some revolutionary act for women to have the sex Alpha sex enjoyment they’ve always “deserved” but have been repressed by transactional sex with Betas.

That said, I can’t disagree entirely with the want for an enthusiastic sex partner who genuinely wants to fuck me 12 ways to Tuesday. And this is women’s rationale today, “Don’t you want to fuck a woman who really wants to fuck you?” It’s hard to argue against the “Hell Yes” girl, until you realize that the sex they are describing is only reserved for the guy they really want to bang and mistakenly believe their overinflated self-value warrants.

Now, I’ve read the debate from PUAs who make the point that it is entirely possible to make a ‘No’ girl into a ‘Hell Yes’ girl. I’ve seen the infield videos so I’ll spare you the linking. My question then is, after deftly applying Game and calibrating all the minutiae to do so, how does this compare to a woman who has a genuine desire for you from the start? I think one huge hurdle for guys unplugging from their Blue Pill conditioning have to face is the presupposition that sex is only the result of a process of negotiation. That negotiation is what the Blue Pill teaches boys and men from a very early age.

Aziz! Light!

The Ansari incident has a lot of Red Pill lessons to teach. First and foremost is the fact that Ansari is a consumate Beta. Looking at the guy he resembles any number of Indian computer programmers frustrated by a want for the secret formula to make a gorgeous American blonde with big tits fall in love with him. Don’t get me wrong, I counsel these men personally, but he fits that schema. Next, Ansari is a vocal and outspoken White Knight for feminism and regularly proves his male self-loathing as part of his standup act. I mean, the guy wears a Time’s Up pin. But like most male feminists, he gets hung by his own Beta Game bullshit – this is the fate of all male feminists.

Lastly, Ansari is a Beta who made good. I’ve talked about the Blue Pill White Knights and self-righteous AFCs in many a post, but I’m not sure I’ve emphasized how dangerous this mindset can be for a Beta who has a combination of affluence, celebrity and social proof. There comes a self-validation in that Blue Pill mindset when women want to be associated with him. He develops a belief that it’s his Blue Pill conditioning, and his adherence to it, that is the reason for his relative success with women. This insulates these guys from ever disconnecting from that conditioning, but it also lessens an incentive to see women in any other perspective. The result of this is exactly what Ansari experienced in this incident. He was too comfortable in presuming his pro-woman, female identifying, Beta Game would make his sexual expression ‘Okay’ with any woman who gave him positive sexual interest.

Another big indicator of this, and really much of Beta Game, was his repeated pawing of Grace and repeated sexual expressions with her. It wasn’t working as he believed it should, so what was his solution? Continue with the negotiation and hope for a positive sign of reinforcement from her. Every act that Ansari attempted with Grace was a form of negotiation. I can’t get sex? How about a blow job? No? Okay how about if I go down on you? She feels forced? Woah, default to female identification persona. Presume the sale, “How do you want me to fuck you?”

This is all one big negotiation – there is no genuine desire and no enthusiasm of the part of Grace – but since Ansari has never had the incentive to learn Game he keep going back to what he thinks should work on her.

To wrap all of this up, I should mention that the reason this whole affair went viral is should really be no surprise. It’s one more example of everything MeToo has been harping on for almost 5 months now, yes, but it’s also an illustration of exactly this new sentiment of the “grey area” sex I brought to light in Dangerous Times – Part 2. It’s sex women have out of courtesy (Aziz got a courtesy hummer) or convenience or just as something to do. It is exactly the obligated sex I’ve been talking about since The Desire Dynamic. This incident is exactly the story this ‘grey sex’ sentiment had needed, but in the larger picture it highlights the difference between transactional sex and validational sex.

As Open Hypergamy becomes yet more normalized it’s now time that the Feminine Imperative acknowledges the type of sex women desire and enjoy, and the type of sex they feel obligated to perform as part of a negotiation or transaction. And naturally the need to define what women’s Hypergamy dictates becomes a new form of shame for men. Evil Patriarchal men are to blame for women having to openly acknowledge that they only want to fuck Alpha men with any real enthusiasm. Men are to blame for validational and transactional sex, and now absolved, women can take the next steps in consolidating on Hypergamy.

No, there’s no current legislation that makes ‘unenthusiasitc sex’ a sex crime (yet), but remember that the sexual arms race is always fought in the court of public opinion before anything is written in ink.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

699 comments on “Thoughts on Aziz Ansari

  1. kfg on bone mass

    Fucking doctors (no offense intended to those present).

    Vitamin K2 assists calcium in getting into bone, rather than into blood vessel walls.
    Weight bearing / load bearing exercise combined with proper nutrition and supplementation wins. “Take it easy, your O L D” kills every time.

  2. At Sir Deti-

    Gamers right, you’re trying to speak dog to a cat. She wanted to be there all right. It’s just that she didn’t want to blow her possible beta bux out of the water. She just didn’t wanna fuck. She misread him as well.

  3. “Bone problems … So would calcium supplements actually be a bad idea in many cases?”

    More often than not it’s pointless. It works under the assumption that if there are bone problems the problem is a shortage of calcium available to the system, which is probably not the case. If there is a shortage of calcium metabolically it’s probably a problem of absorption and/or apportioning, not absolute availability.

    An excess of calcium driven to the bones tends to build up on the joint surfaces, rather than being taken into the body of the bone where it isn’t needed, and that’s bad.

    Just resistance train and eat well (which will not only mean not taking dietary advice from doctors, but from fucking dieticians as well. Dieticians are trained to US Department of Agriculture standards. The principle mission of the USDoA is to sell wheat, corn and soybeans).

    Eggs, red meat, cream, butter. Those are your staples. A bit of liver now and again. Cold water fish as available as fresh as possible.

    If you get enough calories, you’ll get enough calcium.

  4. Manly:

    Maybe it’s too much to ask that women accept responsibility for their parts in sexual encounters, and to ask for what they want and say what they don’t want.

    Women used to be able to do this. Evidently women have degraded/been enabled to the point they can’t do it now.

  5. “Vitamin K2 assists calcium in getting into bone, rather than into blood vessel walls.”

    There are those prognosticating that arteriosclerosis isn’t too far from being diagnosed as a K2 deficiency.

  6. @OBIT – Still not up to my 6. Cute face though.

    @Incubus – Minnesota 6? LOL Whats the NY rating? Good question. She’s only a 6 for someone rationalizing late night at the bar.

    Is it possible that, until “vetted”, using an app like Zuckerberg’s original FB (not the current solipsistic chick validation machine, the one he coded for the twins while still in school, according to the movie), the HBx rating posters provide is only relative to their OWN perceived SMV? Hmmm

  7. @Marelius: I eat my words, she is hot. At least to me, per the pic Sentient posted. I had seen some other low resolution long shot pics of her.

  8. re Grace:

    She’s OK looking, for a traffic bollard.*

    *Traffic bollard; a woman who isn’t attractive enough to draw my attention beyond figuring how to go around her.

  9. hot? she’s cute because she’s young

    more girl next door than hot; don’t get me wrong, still fuckable by a ways

  10. I don’t say that to be snarky, just wondering about the implication here regarding how the concept of “leagues” gets instilled within the BP psyche, and how it might be affecting us in RP game after we wake up.

    @Rollo, I know I have read some of your writing about the concept of “Leagues”, but I don’t recall if you speak to its origin within us, rather than simply calling it out as a buffer concept. If you haven’t dug into its origins, I wonder if you would take some time to think about it and give us your thoughts there. I am always looking for outside perspectives to help me (and others) stay the RP course and alleviate residual BP doubts and fears. The burden of performance until death is heavy, and those perspectives help lighten the load.

    [It’s actually Iron Rule #8, so, yeah,…

  11. thedeti
    Maybe it’s too much to ask that women accept responsibility for their parts in sexual encounters, and to ask for what they want and say what they don’t want.

    That’s “Yes means YES!” from stage 3 sex-pozzy feminism of the GenX sort. We’re beyond that now with Special Snowflake Millennials on the scene. Taking responsibility is hard, says Barbie, when adolescence now lasts to age 24.

    Aziz was just supposed to read her mind, you see.

    He was supposed to just get it.

  12. I commented on this earlier, and frankly, Rollo while you are on point, you are missing what I think is an important aspect. Ansari is experiencing a dissonance sexually that he cannot process, just like say Louis CK or Weinstein. Due to his celebrity status, he has access to women who feign interest as part of their game that a guy with his SMV and betaness would never experience.

    He’s not just “beta”, he’s also Blue Pill and as such has women on a pedestal. Fyi, he’s not a sexual neophyte, you can tell by what he tries with this woman that he’s pretty much a stone cold pervert like me. So this isn’t ineptitude…

    It is about anger and frustration though. It’s bad enough that the betas have whiffs of high SMV women and some flirting here and there, but generally they aren’t really even getting “at bats” with high SMV women. Imagine what it’s like for Ansari – these women now make faux submission and interest signals as part of how they deal with a celebrity. So he wrongly feels HIS SMV is higher to them than it actually is. And in this case, Grace is going along with it, if begrudgingly.

    But even then, on some level Ansari is made even angrier because the access to these women has him see things he would never otherwise experience if he weren’t a celebrity. He can feel their lack of desire, up close and personal. Even as they comply with his calculated and clumsy faux alphaness, he knows deep down they don’t really want him. And this makes him – and Louis CK, Weinstein etc even angrier. This is how Louis CK ends up jacking off in front of women. It’s a shortcut to the same payoff and now at least he’s saying “fuck you” to the girls while he’s getting off. He’s not subjugating himself, now he gets to humiliate them a bit.

    Rollo’s depiction of Last Minute Resistance is such a classic differentiation between the alpha and the beta. When a woman is mixed on sex with me, I stop. I move on to something else, even just watching TV or doing something else. This messes them up cuz we are supposed to beg, and if I’m not, well it must be due to the options I have?

    Fyi, Ansari’s sexual behavior is probably a lot like many betas who’ve studied game “technique” but don’t work on inner game. For you guys trying to Alpha up, focus on sending signals that generate interest and never, ever go after a woman if she doesn’t signal legit interest. Second, learn seduction. Forget Krauser or even RSD – Mystery Method goes the deepest on seduction that I’ve seen. He really focuses on how to work female psychology in a legit way to make a woman fall in love with you, or better said, to go into heat over you.

    Notice that there are no complaints about George Clooney, or say Derek Jeter. Jeter ran though more than 50% of the Maxim 100, lol. Why no complaints? Hell, he had a standard practice of sending a Jeter nik-nak gift basket the day after. Probably a great strategy for stopping any regret that is forming in its tracks. But you betas shouldn’t think it was all smooth sailing for Jeter. He still had to seduce, still had to generate real arousal – ya the girls come preloaded, but still, it’s not like he says “start sucking or bail, bitch”. He’s had to have some women go sideways – but no complaints in public, right? Why? Cuz he’s delivering the alpha fucks they seek and is seducing them the way want to be seduced. And he knows what real interest and arousal look like cuz he gets it regularly – and when he isn’t he knows it and isn’t interested.

    Case study in game, actually, and Ansari has none. But hey, he’s famous and wears “Times Up” pins to make up for his lame ass. Lol, isn’t working so well, is it? Male feminism is a beta, blue pill strategy for getting laid and it doesn’t work well, so they get pissed off.

  13. “Yes means YES!” is a book published back in 2008 by Jaclyn Friedman and Jessica Valenti.

    In California, if a student does not give an enthusiastic “yes”, either verbally or physically, then the sexual act has no consent.

    It’s very important to keep this concept out of legal codes.

  14. That’s the trouble with standard medical thought and calcium supplementation. More calcium isn’t always the answer because it’s difficult to stop calcium from building up in places where you definitely don’t want it.

    I’ve been k2 supplementing for a while as a hedge. I need my arteries to remain supple. I avoid calcium supplements like the plague, regardless of what my doctor happens to think. I get plenty of cal in my diet. Nothing beats regular load bearing exercises, and you don’t even have to squat with 300 pounds to benefit….. But you do need squats.

  15. Anonymous Reader
    Their you go…
    “Paragraph breaks are good things. ”
    it is…
    “All important skills also related to calibration which is where game is truly critical to a wider interaction with the world around you.
    Self awareness is an under rated skill.”

  16. @kfg: one man’s trash is another man’s gold. Maybe I have been around a lot of mediocre girls lately. Downside of living in a small town, the lifestyle is good but the hot chicks leave the nest to chase tingles in big cities.

    @Sentient: I am going to order Ansari’s book and read it …. for lols. I guess the book will be available at 99% discount now, a signed copy that too.

  17. And he knows what real interest and arousal look like cuz he gets it regularly –

    And betas like Ansari don’t know what real interest and arousal look like cuz they never see it.`Even if they see it shown to alphas in their presence, they don’t “see” it.

  18. In California, if a student does not give an enthusiastic “yes”, either verbally or physically, then the sexual act has no consent.

    Of course, a woman can withdraw her consent retroactively, even 40 years later.

  19. @AR:

    Good old Jessica “I’m upset that I don’t get sexually harassed on the street now that I’ve turned 30” Valenti

  20. Lets stop using the name Grace…


    So he wrongly feels HIS SMV is higher to them than it actually is. And in this case, Abby is going along with it, if begrudgingly. – FIFY

  21. @asd: “And betas like Ansari don’t know what real interest and arousal look like cuz they never see it.`Even if they see it shown to alphas in their presence, they don’t “see” it.”

    The beta sees it, but uses buffers like “if only she knew how much I love her”, “this girl is damaged, not all girls are like this”, “my ideal girl will not do this, so I am better off without this one”. He doesn’t want to hurt his little ego by admitting that he lacks the SMV, but carries on with the false conviction “I must be enough”, without making any effort to improve his situation.

    And he lives with this false belief until he comes across a girl who shows him some attention, and he thinks his time has arrived and goes for the kill at the first chance without creating arousal in her, because “I must be enough”.

  22. re: “Grace”

    Eh. She’s not unattractive, but she isn’t “hot”, at least not to my eyes. All dolled up she’s probably just above a 6, otherwise she’s a 5.25 – 5.5 range. If you look around you can see other pics of her and she’s quite average looking really, unless you live in a place where most of the women her age are fat. Some other guys may find she is more their “niche” and uprate, or they may live in a place with less attractive women so her thin-ness uprates her relative to where they live. In a city like NY, DC or LA she’s no straight 6 based on most of her pics, again unless she is totally dolled up, in which case she probably crosses that threshold (I tend to think a good, proper dolling up that is well done can net a girl around a full point).

    Ansari probably found her really attractive, though, because some south asian guys (most?) idolize white women wildly, and therefore uprate their appearance quite a bit.

  23. Nova
    Haha, right, If my LTR has drawn any clear public IOIs over the years it is usually South Asian guys (and the one black guy who was literally licking his chops and giving me a smile while she sauntered innocently past with that little extra bit of junk in the trunk).

    But back to the forensics…
    Aziz met her at some kind of gala event and then saw her next on their date, she so probably was more “dolled up” than usual both times. Google her name and go to Images and you get a range of looks from, oh, 5 to 7ish. “Some things to like,” as they say at Daily Racing Form; she has some facial features to work with and as a photog she understands this. I’d reserve further judgment until hearing her speak.

    Now why she showed any initial interest in him — and what she was really thinking, feeling and hoping to get during the whole sorry episode — is a mystery her own first-person account leaves in the dark. Maybe even she doesn’t know or doesn’t want to say.

  24. Abby hot? meh

    Where would you put her in this line up?×720.jpg

    Where would she put herself?

    Flip it around, say Aziz’s accuser looked like this?

    Now would that even be believable? Or if this girl stood next to Abby in a bar, would you even be able to see her?


    Let’s not go crazy, there are baseline standards to maintain gents.

  25. I am no Chad Thundercock. Was blue pilled for the majority of my life, but even then I knew when a girl was not into me even if she was texting me or hugging me after a couple of drinks, because I could SEE how she was overtly sexual with other guys. It was intuition … which I guess is called “calibration”. Can’t count how many times I said “No” to booty calls at 3 PM from girls who were treating me like a friend 2 hours ago in the club and flirting with other guys, but calling me later because Chad left with someone else.

    With Ansari it is different, as Rollo rightly pointed out in “Dangerous Times” series, that when a beta acquires a lot of money or fame, he wrongly thinks he is “Alpha”.

  26. No matter how many times I’ve read. ” Chad Thundercock ” over the years, it still makes me laugh every time.

  27. @Sentient: Agreed … Abby would be invisible in a bar standing next to one of these.

    But you don’t see girls like these in a bar in smaller towns.

    The population of the town where I am in less than 100K and so the pool of thin, young girls is less than 2K. I would be happy to bump into someone like Abby on a night out.

  28. OK, OK, but put Abby and Aziz in an anonymous police-style lineup, with no markers of status. Far more men would be attracted to Abby than women would be attracted to Aziz. (Though I don’t presume to speak for South Asian women).

    Abby and Aziz … Abby and Aziz … I think a sitcom idea could be brewing here: It Is What Aziz

  29. I’m willing to believe that there may be some similarity between what happened and what Grace says happened. But I’m not going to assume that her version is fact.

    Even reading her version, she’s a mess. She needs to get her head out of her ass.

  30. “I think Abby works at the Burger King a few blocks from me.”

    It doesn’t matter if she photographs celebrities or flips burgers for a living. It doesn’t change her SMV. Looks > status

  31. Abby is cute and thin. In New York with much competition I suppose she’s a 7, in a small town an 8.

    But anyhow Aziz’s career and reputation appear to have been thoroughly trashed. A resounding success for the metoo/timesup/etc movement. I see there was a bit of a conflict between older feminists, who realized this was going too far, and younger ones who decided Aziz needed to be destroyed over this. The younger ones won, and I expect we can see more such accusations in the future.

  32. @ Incubus

    I’m married so I’m just actually banging my own personal 7 now.

    But I cosign what Nova said. I can see the empire state building from my deck ( some assholes are building skyscraper condos that are as tall or taller, and fuxking with my view ) and even the proximity makes a world of difference in how the women look en mass.

    So yeah, there are metric tons of 6-7’s here, but the competition for being hawt is fierce as hell and Abby would fall way short in comparison. Not a dig at her personally, just an observation. In my neighborhood and in the surrounding towns, 50 year old women are having liposuction/body contouring procedures done and are still putting up a fight for a measure of hotness.

    Myself, I’d walk past Abby on a crowded street. I’d probably notice her hair because I like a good mane on a chick, but I wouldn’t turn around as she walked past.

  33. “The population of the town where I am in less than 100K . . . ”

    [AOL]OMG! Me too!!![/AOL]

    In the rust belt:

    Friend of mine once joked that in the summer he’d sit out on the stoop (it’s a Dutch thang) watching the girls comparing tattoos go by and imagine them putting on more clothes.

    Still on the same day I can go out and likely find one worth a biker’s double take.* I’ve known a few that beat Hollywood pretty to hell and gone, because they were actually pretty.

    Maybe we’ve just got more old school Dutch and British genes here than some other places.

  34. “And why dread works? Well – in ages past a man abandoning a woman was a death sentence for her. Which may also explain “agreeableness”.

    What does abandonment mean for women in “the West” these days? A hard life.

    Death is more serious.”

    @ Simon, actually, it’s clear that women are not too sure about this. Remember that Hillary Clinton quote regarding how women have always been the most victimized by war? You know the one when she says how women lose their sons, husbands and fathers to war? Like somehow the death of men is less tragic then the women left behind to mourn them?

    What I like about this quote, and the underlying implications, is that it is actually worse then it sounds. One can see this clearly once you flip the POV. So, here goes….

    If you are a man in war you will likely be targeted for death, YET, if you survive, you will go through the same things that the women do, i.e. loss of father, brother, son. Further, if you’re conquered, and LIVE, you get to see your women you were sworn to protect RAPED and mutilated or mothering the children of your conquerers.

    But you know women have it worse.

    So, to circle back around… When women start to use this logic that somehow surviving loved one’s deaths is worse than death itself, and that rape is somehow worse than death, I simply ask why (when I’m in ZFG mode) more rape victims don’t kill themselves? I mean, if its worse, just do it.

  35. I agree with @j, that girl is easily a 7. Sure she can vary from 6 a 7 or a high 7 with some favorable circumstances depending on make up or whatever and a bit of personal taste. I would not put that one as an 8 and she is even kind of my type. Many of you guys are really picky though, we’ve discussed that before, you somehow don’t see the loads of 5s or something that makes a slim, pretty (but not gorgeous) girl like this a 7.

    There ARE tons of 5s, 6s and 7s though. True 8s is a different story.

  36. Holy shit! This post just burnt a hole in my soul, I am fucking Ansari.

    Fucking genuine desire, its painful to realise your someone’s transactional buddy.

    With the recent girl I’m with I pushed sex onto her on the first night.

    Result? Five months later I’ve only slept with her 5 times after countless nights sleeping together. Apparently we should wait for marriage…

    To make it worse each lay resulted in me having to stop during the act and her crying. In retrospect I can’t recall one act of genuine desire.

    Mind you this is a post waller who previously chased musicians, athletes and party goers younger than her but was rebuffed because of ugly.

    That’s it, turn me over, I’m done, I’m cooked and well and truly done. I’m outa here.

    Let the naturals have at it. After a lifetime of insecurity because of lichen sclerosus the biomechanical Gods have declared victory. Some men were just meant to be bottom of the pile.

    This was a painful read, everything Rollo writes is Gods truth.

  37. “If I don’t agree to be alone with you, it’s because I’m not ready for some kind of sexual contact with you. I’m not attracted to you (enough) (yet). I’m not comfortable (enough)(yet). It’s not the right time for me. I’m on my period. I’m in a bad mood. I have too many other things on my mind.

    “If I am alone with you in my dorm room/apartment/house/hotel room, it’s because I am ready for some kind of sexual contact. In fact I’m more or less expecting one of us to initiate it, and I’m hoping you will be the man and take the lead on it. I might not always be clear about what I want, or what I will do, but I will be very clear about what I will not do. If I don’t want to do something, I will say so, clearly, and I reserve the right not to tell you why. I’ll also do what I need to do to make sure that things I don’t want, don’t happen, up to and including leaving/telling you to leave.”- @thedeti

    This was my experience in college in the early ‘90s, and at work after graduation. It was simple. If she was alone with you, it was her way of saying you had the green light- until her response turned to yellow or red.

    I, and all the guys I knew, respected that when her response turned yellow or red, you backed off.

    Both parties had responsibilities, and both parties accepted those responsibilities. That was the bargain. Things might get a little awkward, but they really never got Aziz Ansari aggressive.

    I feel badly for the young guys now. Women like “Grace” aren’t accepting their responsibility. She never should have agreed to be alone with him if she didn’t want sex. If she did want sex, and he made it weird, then she should have excused herself from his apartment and not rewarded him with a pity BJ.

    Like @Mineter said, if she’s not excited to be on the date, get the check before ordering dinner and bail. It’s not going to go the way you want, and apparently these days you can’t expect her to uphold her end of the bargain.

  38. Interesting though that the SMP ratings are all within 2 points though: 5-7. Average to Above average.

    I’d rate her as a 5 as she is very much not my type, where as IAS puts her at an easy 7 but draws the line there saying “I would not put that one as an 8 and she is even kind of my type.”

    Looks like personal preference tends to only make a 2 point difference in most cases.

  39. also @j,

    that vice video you linked was awesome — goes along with some other things I have been working on. Getting all kinds of good ideas.

  40. The details of their encounter reveal a lot. I hadn’t looked into them and now that I’ve read them, I agree.

    There is another way I’ve always seen this “negotiation” schema. It is really nothing more than bribery, blackmail, and con artistry. Yes, he was “negotiating” but all of these type negotiations boil down to one or a mixture those three. Playing the white knight and expecting “love” in return is literally nothing more than a fucking bribe. Betas do this (and probably we have all been guilty at some time) because they have no confidence in their own sexuality and a low level of comfort with sexual relations with another person. Negotiation itself is used as a buffer in this sense. Lack of experience, fear, and lack of confidence (and lack of good home training by a father) makes these guys think they must bullshit their way with women. Unfortunately much of PUA and “game” does these guys no good because they are simply trading one bowl of bullshit for another.

    Both sexes have always been down to fuck and that is not changing. But when men think they have to put beta games or substitute PUA “game” for “alpha” between themselves, women and sex, no one is really down to fuck. She is disgusted, distrustful and repulsed. He is too busy “negotiating” and / or playing PUA to just follow his natural desire and enjoy her. Beta game, negotiating, and posing “alpha” are simply forms of impotence.

  41. All that said does not negate the fact that men in general are now getting a raw shitty deal and everyone is a little clumsy once in a while.

  42. Rape is criminalized male weaponization of sex.

    There is no criminalized female weaponization of sex.

  43. I entirely agree with Deti’s comment as to the fact that once upon a time if a woman came back to your place then prima facie she was interested in getting layed. She has no business doing so otherwise.

    I only ever had one bad experience which this story puts me in mind of an experience which continues to play unhappily in my mind. I had dated a girl a few times. She was perhaps a year or two older and in her late twenties. Despite those dates our relationship had not involved any sort of intimacy – I had other women for that but I enjoyed her company. On that fateful night I drove her back to her home which was a very large house. She, for the first time, invited me in and informed me that her parents were asleep in the east wing and that we would not be disturbed, She put on some soft music and made coffee. We sat together on the settee; she changed the record. Nothing seemed to be happening; the record was changed again and perhaps a third time. Surely I was expected to make a move for she had given me so many green lights. I made my move; she froze. I cautiously removed my hand and after thirty seconds expressed a view as to the time and the necessity of departing, I stood up and walked to the door and out into the hall. She followed me – it was a long hall – but now there was fear in her voice. She was desperate to see me again whereas I was tacitly certain that would never happen. I suppose in some way I felt used or messed about. She was wasting my time with her whether I had long or short term interests. It was a form of Prick-Tease

    I relate all that because to this day of all the encounters I have had that is the only one that distastefully plays in my mind as if it had happened only yesterday.

  44. @Sentient:

    Back in the day one of the big makeup companies (can’t remember which one) did this publicity stunt where they built a cage that could be placed over a head that had depth gauges all over it, set to the ideal shape.

    They toured it around and women could come into whatever shop they had it in and have a go at it (and then be sold makeup, of course).

    Then they got various popular beauties to give it a try.

    Nobody was ever a perfect match, but Catherine Deneuve is the one the came close enough for bullseye shooting:

  45. @Opus

    she froze

    It could be that she wanted something to happen originally, but in the moment, she balked…maybe she was inexperienced…thinking that she can’t believe that she’s actually going thru with this…that happens and it just takes a little patience and humor to defuse the tension and awkwardness…”oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that we came here to play tiddly winks”…[with a wry grin]…then you just relax and spread your arms and look around do something asexual like pick up a book or turn off the stereo and turn on the telly and let her nerves calm down and let her make a move…it takes calibration and maybe create a bit of fantasy…go on the balcony with her and look at the sky and say, “Imagine if we were traveling in space and got marooned on a planet…just the two of us…and were looking at the sky on a night like tonight.”

  46. “The short answer is a beta’s death is not worth a women’s rape. That’s the world, right there.”

    “There is no criminalized female weaponization of sex.”

    On it, another habit that must be vanquished. Today i approached a girl and was about to go out with another one… So far not sure how that may work out. Just found out this women i am interested in isnt going to be able to make it. That’s Fine also found out we are having a rugby gathering on Friday which i miss and hope to attend and learn from. You shouldn’t have to read the same mistakes over and over again. Which man who is worth a grain of salt keeps repeating the same errors in his quest for maximizing his human potential? No one here seem’s to repeat their same scripted tradegy or what have you… We all learn from each other by damn… At some point im still frustrated with myself for being so slow at learning the ways of
    the Sensei…
    No toxic madness no excuses no blame on other’s no attack’s on anything… I am all i am but to get their it would help to push passed what keep’s bringing me down. Which is funny because all of it is out of my control.
    Being a man is ironic In order to lead you must know yourself and in order to know yourself you must face what hurts the most. The part’s of any man that create build and fail are personal and it appears the reason for that is because being a man can be incredible lonely. You go through trials and affirmation’s which can be a family or a community such as a church or tribe that you connect with and lead. Not leading is what I’ve come to learn is escaping the burden of performance.
    Leadership is action mixed with potential to destroy something quickly while building something new.
    By the gods…

  47. @ a s gamer

    You could of course be correct. Perhaps had I played it differently it might have had a different outcome. The trouble is this: that every man who has been on the dating scene for some while is going to have that evening where what looked to be a certainty proves otherwise.

    I think by-the-way that that is the message from Da Ponte’s libretto for Don Giovanni. Giovanni has slept with 2,445 women – I counted; we know he has slept with Elvira who chases after him still; we know that on the day of her wedding peasent-girl Zerlina contrives to have her own fiancee beaten-up so she can go off with Giovanni, but because Anna is making what can only be a false allegation of Rape (Da Ponte leaves subtle hints) things begin to spiral out of control, yet Giovanni until the end is as you would encourage light-hearted. Fiction of course but I think it remarkable that Da Ponte in 1787 is so prescient.

  48. @Blax: Girls are not an issue. It is just that I encounter 5s and 6s on the regular. They are not bad, but doable. Being in a small town even these girls tend to sometimes behave like 8s or 9s, but learning Game has helped me tame their madness. I get my fix of super hot girls every couple of months when I visit Paris, Berlin, Dublin for work … and my holiday every year in Romania 😉

    Sorry to hear about losing the view of the Empire State Building. NY skyline is the best view in the world. I have set it as a wall paper on my laptop for the last 7 years.

    @Rugby: You should type more. Everybody here wants to know more about you. Your heart is in the right place, but it appears it needs a lot of healing.

  49. Abby is the kind of girl whose friends look like this.

    Sentient calls it again. Every man has to work with what’s available locally in the near term. Across the length and breadth of the plains states, those chicks are the standard issue.

    Hey they’re clean. Low on visible tats and piercings. Normal hair colors. Probably hoping for some exotic guy (New Yorker, Californian) that just gets it to show up.

  50. I’ve been a TRM reader for over a year and decided to pop my comment cherry on this one.. So, where to begin..

    I think Rollo covered it well, and I agree with Deti’s comment in that she clearly was not living up the her female responsibility of managing the situation.. She put herself in that position by going back to his place, and I think she was quite open to the possibility of sex with him.. that is until he made it cringe worthy awkward, and rushed the hell out of closing the physical arousal aspect of things… While it was painful to read her account of how it all went down, I can’t help but think WTF was she doing continuing to go along with his advances.. She gives him pity head, and is still kissing him till the bitter end.. If she wanted it to stop all she needed to do was disengage and leave.. When she did, he made no aggressive effort to stop her, thus I call BS on her whole #MeToo claim..

    That said, I think scribblerg nailed it in his comments about some of these social proof Beta’s getting frustrated, and even vengefully angry when dealing with lukewarm, mixed signal snowflakes.. Aziz has no game beyond some crap he took from porn and when his calibration was all wrong (despite what he had to sense of her disinterest) he only doubles down. This is definitely a frustrated, desperate chump move.. She gave him mixed signals that his ego and denial refused to heed for what they really were..

    The lesson here is ‘be the prize’ don’t push shit that isn’t there, and don’t accept anything that isn’t genuine arousal. Even in my Bluest Pill days I could sense when a woman was or was not really interested, and I didn’t want it if it wasn’t “enthusiastic desire”

  51. Having sat next to (and gotten a date from) a chick in high school who later became a super model, I’m gonna call this chick a solid 6. She’s cute, totally invisible next to hot. The Wall will eat her alive. She certainly wasn’t worth risking the accusations at any rate.

  52. @Incubus_Rising: I live in a small town as well, 12k to be exact. Love the beauty, the lifestyle and impact I can have giving back to the community. But, after burning through the limited supply of available 7’s here and in the surrounding community (all two of them) I grabbed a rental in the nearby big city 2 hours away. Dual life is proving to have it’s advantages. You ever consider that?

    Recently met an LTR potential (I’d give her an 8) thanks to my big city base of operations but Silver Fox’s ‘Serpent’ stories are haunting me with this one. It’s so easy to maintain frame when you don’t have or want any deeper involvement (like with my small town 7’s). But in one short month, I’ve observed myself slipping with my big city 8. Just when I thought I had internalized RP principles and was my own mental point of origin too…

  53. A couple years back, my wife got Aziz Ansari’s book “Modern Romance” in audiobook form, and wanted to play it in the car on a road trip. The book, which is presented as a guide to how we conduct “modern romance”, was co-written with a sociology professor and consists of a bunch of descriptions of interviews with 20 and 30-year-olds, and data produced by the sociologist. I remember this was just after my red-pilling and I was actively comparing his conclusions (or his co-writer’s, more likely) to what I had decided was the accurate description of reality outlined by Game.

    I can tell you that if he had anything to do with writing that book (he narrated the audio version) then the description of his behavior is spot on. He’s absolutely a blue pill beta, but one who knows that things like Dread Game or an abundance mindset work to attract women’s interest. He doesn’t take this revelation well, snarking about the sort of men who would resort to withholding affirmation in order to get a woman into bed and imploring women to have more self-esteem (and holding himself as above this sort of behavior, throughout). His desire to be seen as one of the good men who sees the innate purity of women is shot throughout the book, or at least the half that I listened to. I’m probably leaving out some other details, but I’m confident saying that the part of the book I remember meshes perfectly with Rollo’s assessment.

  54. Definite 6 magnet!/img/httpImage/image.jpg_gen/derivatives/article_1200/86657885.jpg

    Coincidentally, a different Confidenti@l source spotted the pair back in September and, while the spy said the couple looked “happy,” the onlooker admitted the comedian seemed distracted. “He was kind of dragging her along and holding her hand while on the phone,” said the source.


    Ansari met McBroom – who co-owns the Large Marge food company in LA – when she was a chef at the much-loved Momofuku Milk Bar.

    “I was working at Momofuku Milk Bar in Manhattan,” she told Food & Wine Magazine, “Someone said, ‘Aziz Ansari is here!’ I didn’t know who he was.

    A year later we met at an event and bonded over Hokey Pokey cookies. They’re made from smoked oats and a weird New Zealand toffee candy called Hokey Pokey.”

    Ha ha…

  55. @ Rugby11

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts for a change, man. And well done on getting up to do some improv comedy in front of folk. That takes some balls. Much more challenging than approaching a woman you’re attracted to cold…

    I agree that’s never too late (unless you are on your death bed) to re-invent yourself. Whilst i’ve been writing songs, playing in bands & recording and releasing music for most of my adult life, it’s only since i turned 50 that i’ve dived into electronic music production, something i’ve really wanted to do for many years. Whilst i have a good ear for arrangements etc, i let fear/laziness/lack of discipline & focus etc hold me back from learning the software for way too long. But turning 50 is quite an amazing milestone (not sure of your age but i reckon you’re younger). It challenges you to really reflect honestly with yourself on your life and to start taking more responsibility to make the remaining years as fulfilling and productive as possible. For me that revolves around producing interesting music which i’m doing with aplomb. I’ve dropped 20 of my own electronic compositions on Soundcloud in my first 12 months which i consider to be a very productive year. Now a well known Producer mate of mine is going to be mastering my trax which is great. But it’s a testament of my focus and long hours in the studio, something it took me until 50 to get together!

    So for all you newbies here and some of you oldies who may need a reminder, as the Red Pill scriptures clearly state, make your own self improvement your main goal in life. And do it for you, not for a woman. Period! We must be authentic men. Authentic to our own individual muses. This all makes perfect sense to me now. You can teach an old dog new tricks if he’s open and willing to learn. I’ve now accepted this is a Summer of mostly solitude in the Monk Cave, and as much as i’d love to have a sweet thing to play with in the evenings, i’m just sucking it up and focusing my energy on my goals rather than lamenting my lack of pussy. Hey, i’ve had a very good run over the years and Dr Mojo will return to my crib big time if i honour my journey. I know this…

    And that, gentlemen, is where it’s at in the FoX Den…

  56. kfg
    Good old Jessica “I’m upset that I don’t get sexually harassed on the street now that I’ve turned 30” Valenti

    Always a cosmic tragedy when a woman’s fried ice is too cold…surprising that there was never an ancient Greek play about that.

  57. SjR “pops his comment cherry” — congrats!
    Opus makes possibly TRM’s the first opera reference? — all right!

    Does anyone know if Abby faced the music and revealed herself, or if she was found out? Or did she kinda want to be found out? If she had given Aziz the same privilege she afforded herself — anonymity — I’d be willing to just say, let’s see what we can learn from this sorry incident. Instead she continued, as NBTM says, the female weaponization of sex, and of the internet.

    I’m sure the DARPA guys were going, “Eureka! We’ve invented the internet! Finally somewhere a woman can turn when a clueless guy sticks fingers in her mouth!” Great invention, but here comes The Law of Unintended Consequences

  58. Blaximus
    No matter how many times I’ve read. ” Chad Thundercock ” over the years, it still makes me laugh every time.

    Ok, next time one of us goes to some stupid convention where little name tags are worn…
    Bonus points for checking into the convention hotel under that name.

  59. J

    Interesting. I watched those clips I posted and didn’t chuckle once. He so self deprecating, and it doesn’t work because, well… Just look at him.

  60. Once you have a taste for genuine desire, you won’t accept anything less. Let’s face it, Aziz Ansari is not a man that women genuinely desire. Like Rollo, I had no idea who he was till this allegation. You don’t see women celeb crushing on this man. He has most likely been around women who wanted him for his perceived status but never had any real desire to fuck his brains out.

    Chasing desire is a fool’s errand, and anything less than genuine desire actually feels off-putting once you have a taste of it. When you see that the woman is staring back at you unenthusiastically as if she could care less she was with you, why would you want to pursue? Only a beta male who is used to that ‘aloofness’ that fickle pity starfish sex could see it as a worthy pursuit.

  61. Incubus_Rising
    It’s ego and that’s why i share thing’s without wanted any recognition. I don;t want to appease my ego and all the fantasy aspect’s of my subconscious. I am struggling to hold on to a world that has never existed. A world i love but that no longer exist.
    Approaching Self reliance building my ideals into reality while loving the men that i have direct contact with. Not imposing anything on anybody. A huge portion of my anger comes from using religious conviction to determine the morality of anyone including me.
    Over the weekend i meant up with a bunch of men in NYC with Mike Cernovich. I found men their who where hurting struggling and giving life the best they could with what little they had. Meant two people in particular who where Joining the world and life we are living today. Don’t drink alcohol so when i was asked to get i drank i joked about one Called Manhattan. Ended up letting him drink it while he shared his story about his history with New york’s steel and hard labor in building. Being around men in person is one thing that keep’s me humble. Man the complaining and arrogance i have in me…
    It’s annoying but i know how it got their. The moment i left the conference i went back to the place i was staying. I was calm and happy to be a part of a community who respect’s the ability to converse on the the importance of not giving up or giving in. But keeping your head up while the world collide’s or clash’s with reality. Not to oppose with rage or madness. But to accept first within yourself what can you do to help? Not hiding behind a computer screen but looking into the eye’s of another man who is going through a hard time with a limited reference of solution’s.

    I went back to my room i was staying in. I took a deep breath and had this moment where i was actually resting on something i saw and wanted to be a part of. A bonding experience where i could ask question’s and see how fashion is in important part of the human relationship’s we have with one another.

    “Being a man is ironic In order to lead you must know yourself and in order to know yourself you must face what hurts the most without anger”

    Yeah that last part…
    Meditation on a pillow…

    USA region

  62. Rugby11
    Simon’s so right … “without anger”
    So lighten up the cross, it’s a long journey.
    Are you still in NYC?

  63. @Sentient – I thought maybe he’d done some PUA course or something. The whole encounter sounds so mechanistic and outcome oriented, so forced. I don’t think most AFCs have the resilience to push through all that. Bad PUA is a fast course to all kinds of trouble…

    @JohhnyComeLately – I don’t understand your medical challenges, so perhaps your case is not easily dealt with. But I know this. Any man can learn to handle intersexual dynamics better and get better outcomes with women if he really learns the truth of human intersexuality. Maybe not huge gains all the time, but definitely less drama, more calm, better sex. Fyi, the crying when she fucks you is pure shit testing, and really is emotionally abusive. You ought to of course leap off of her when she pulls crap like that, scream “What the fuck is wrong with you?” and then storm out of the room. Make her come crawling to you to apologize for it. Give her ups and downs, make her work for you. Another hint? Jerk off every time she makes you sleep with her without fucking…Tell her, “Listen, i’m fucking horny and you won’t help.”

    She’ll respect you. At first she go batshit, but don’t buy in. See through it as the childish manipulation it most surely is.

    Re: “Chad Thundercock” – He’s a myth. I’m barely 5’8″ and spent some of my life 20 lbs overweight. I do have a very good face as they say, but really, next to some buff, 6’2″ guy I can be overlooked. But I’m not. You see I’m socially dominant, and I combine this with social and emotional intelligence, and women are drawn to this like flies to shit. The average guy a woman meets is often a social retard, with the communications skills of a 14yo boy. A man who is skilled in conversation and understands what women doing and signaling is like catnip to them. Learn to flirt – I can do it at 55 with a 20yo girl and not feel embarrassed or make it awkward. You can likely do so too

    If you are seriously interested in changing, try out Mystery Method, do his course, you can download it as a torrent for free. Female interest, attraction and arousal is not the same as male’s, and regardless of how you look you can become much better with women by learning what’s really going on with them and how to generate genuine desire in women.

    Inner game is the frontier – how you see yourself and the world. This is where the work takes place. Best of luck to you.

  64. The Solitary Silver FoX
    Whats the soundcloud link to hear your music? Who are your influence’s?

    “make your own self improvement your main goal in life. And do it for you, not for a woman. Period! We must be authentic men. Authentic to our own individual muses. This all makes perfect sense to me now. You can teach an old dog new tricks if he’s open and willing to learn. I’ve now accepted this is a Summer of mostly solitude in the Monk Cave,”

    In solitude i find the best of myself… Walking in the Forrest on my solution’s. What can i do to become better? What’s your strategy and vision of being The best darn Silver fox in the world?

  65. Rugby, if you are still blaming yourself for some bad things that happened in the past, that has stop. It does no good and actively harms you. Forgive yourself.

  66. O.B.I.T.
    I left sunday morning… But man i fall in love with those streets every time i get off the bus… I love that city something about new york really connect’s to the best human’s are capable of.

    Anonymous Reader
    Im not blaming anybody but myself. Not for something in the past but what i can do in the present. What is in my realm of control my best ability to become a sculpted man of courage and mastery. Healing for me is allowing IT the pain or sadness of not knowing what to do go away. It’s being ok with saying Fuck. Starting over again with appreciation for still having a chance. Not taking myself out due to frustration of circumstances out of my control. I have a serious default in Conviction and being “Right”. I suppose i am a scientific madmen attempting to solve or cure something from a place in my childhood that’s been deep with abandonment.

  67. Anonymous & Blaximus – I rolled laughing earlier when I read ‘Chad Thundercock’, and I was in a work meeting and supposed to be paying attention… Lol! I later text to ask my girl how she would feel if I changed my name to Chad Thundercock? Her reply: “I’ll still love you, Mr. Cock”
    I’m very much game for putting that on a name tag.. Hahaha

    Ok seriously now, I’m sitting here thinking about this Abby (Grace) girl’s comment “You guys are all the same” while I sip some whiskey.. I can’t help but think that in her Disney, fairy tale mind she honestly wants some guy to melt her panties off.. She just hasn’t found it yet due to poor screening of beta men and what seems to be a bit of gold digging?

    I’m no super suave PUA, or seduction guru.. All the same, I will say to all of you out there, do not underestimate the power of deliberate moves.. hesitation, when being physical with women. In my experience using momentary hesitation (or seductive pauses) showing a sense of control of both yourself and of her, does wonders to feed her anticipation.. Anticipation is certainly a factor in physical desire, and toying with them.. not acting like a caveman who must have it NOW, does wonders to getting your girl physically and emotionally aroused.. Just pulling back from a kiss and letting your lips brush hers will (In my experience) get her kissing you much more passionately. The point is, unlike Aziz rushing to ‘get it in’ and telegraphing desperation.. take your time and enjoy the moments.. all of them. Enjoy her lips.. enjoy her body.. enjoy the effect you have on her breathing.. intimacy is a process.. respect that process with a firm and controlled determination.. This is the masculinity that women want to find in men.. They want to submit to the man who enjoys the process.. They get their satisfaction from feeling that you are satisfied with their bodies in both a physical and emotional sense.. Balance this with your desire to ‘consume’ their female bodies, and you’ll be on the right track.. I do think aggressive taking what you want is masculine and desired, so I’m not discouraging that, but the balance here and timing, is key..

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