It started with a girl I met at summer camp and ended with the woman for whom I left my first wife. In between, I bounced from one girl to the next — dozens of them — without so much as a day off between romances. You might have called me a serial monogamist, except that I was never exactly monogamous. Relationships overlapped, and those overlaps were always marked by exhausting theatricality: sobbing arguments, shaming confrontations, broken hearts. Still, I kept doing it. I couldn’t not do it.
I can’t say that I was always looking for a hotter girl. I’d trade good women for bad ones; their character didn’t much matter to me. I wasn’t exactly seeking love, regardless of what I might have told them. I can’t even say it was the sex either. Sex was just the gateway drug for me, a portal to the much higher high I was really after, which was the chase, the seduction.
Seduction is the art of coercing somebody to desire you; playing on someone else’s longings to suit your own agenda. Seduction was never a casual sport for me; it was more like a heist, adrenalizing and urgent. I would plan the seduction for months sometimes, picking the target, looking for openings. Then I would break into her deepest vault, steal all her emotional currency and use it myself.
If the girl was already in a committed relationship, I knew that I didn’t need to be hotter or “better” than her botfriend; I just needed to be different. (The novel doesn’t always win out over the familiar, mind you, but it often does.) The trick was to study the boyfriend and to become his opposite, thereby positioning myself to this woman as a sparkling alternative to her regular life.
Soon enough, and sure enough, I began to see that woman’s attitude toward me change from indifference, to trust, to IOIs, to open desire. That’s what I was after: the sensation of steadily dragging her fullest attention toward me and only me. My guilt about the boyfriend was no match for the intoxicating knowledge that — somewhere on the other side of town — somebody couldn’t sleep that night because she was thinking about me. If she needed to sneak out of his house after midnight in order to call, better still. That was power, but it was also affirmation. I was her irresistible temptation. I loved that sensation, I needed it, not sometimes, not even often, but always.
I might win the girl over eventually. But over time (and it wouldn’t take long), her unquenchable infatuation for me would fade, as her attentions and guilt returned to her boyfriend. This always left me feeling abandoned and invisible; desire that could be quenched was not nearly enough for me. As soon as I could, then, I would start seducing another girl, by turning myself into an entirely different guy, in order to attract an entirely different woman. These episodes of shape-shifting cost me though. I would lose weight, sleep, dignity, clarity. As anyone who has ever watched a werewolf movie knows, transmutation is excruciating and terrifying, but once that process has been set into motion — once you have glimpsed that full moon — it cannot be reversed. I could endure these painful episodes only by assuring myself: ‘‘This is the last time. This girl is the ONE.’’
Back then, if you asked me what I was up to, I might have claimed that I was a helpless romantic — and how can you judge that? If I was really cornered, I might have argued that I was a revolutionary bucking the trend by countering women’s own manipulations in kind.In my mid-20s, I married, but not even matrimony slowed me down. Predictably, I grew restless and felt unappreciated for my Beta supportive sacrifices. Soon enough I seduced a new girl; the marriage collapsed. But it was worse than just that. Before my divorce settlement was even signed, I was already breaking up with the girl I had broken up my marriage for. You know you’ve got intimacy issues when, in the space of a few short months, you find yourself visiting two completely different couples’ counselors, with two completely different women on your arm, in order to talk about two completely different emotional firestorms. Trying to keep all my various story lines straight (Whom am I angry at, again? Who is angry at me now? Whose office is this?) made my hands shake and my mind falter.
At our last counseling session, my soon-to-be-ex-girlfriend and I argued bitterly, and she ran off in a different direction. I came home distressed, only to find a string of distressing phone messages from my divorce lawyer: Nothing but ruin on that front too. Then I did an unusual thing. I did not grab the telephone and call yet another woman. Instead, I asked myself, ‘‘What are you doing with your life?’’
For the first time, I forced myself to admit that I had a problem — indeed, that I was a problem. Tinkering with other people’s most vulnerable emotions didn’t make me a romantic; it just made me a cad. Lying and cheating didn’t make me brazen; it just made me a needy coward. Stealing other men’s girlfriends didn’t make me a an irresistible player; it just made me a menace. I hated that it took me almost 20 years to realize this. There are 16-year-old kids who know better than to behave this way. It felt shameful. But once I got it, I really got it: There is no way to stop a destructive behavior, except to stop.
I spent the next six months celibate and serious, working with a good therapist, trying to learn if I even existed at all when I wasn’t soaking up women’s desire for me. Then one afternoon I ran into a girl I liked. We went for a long walk in the park. Flirted. Laughed. It was sweet. Eventually she said, ‘‘Would you like to come back to my apartment with me?’’
Yes! My God, how I wanted to unwrap this woman like a Christmas present!
Wasn’t this great? Wasn’t this a beautifully written, wise and brave account? Too many men are punished, and quietly punish themselves, for what is indeed our birthright: “human complexity”. Understanding and acceptance of a man’s capacity for cruelty is necessary for personal growth, right?
Have you ever been the cuckold boyfriend on the other side of this equation? Isn’t it nice to get a bit more clarity from a PUAs side? Its a rough road, but I admire this guy’s courage and honesty. He’s earned my forgiveness and I expect he’s also earned yours.
Or…is this guy just an evil fuck seeking absolution from women for his manipulations? Should we forgive a guy who’d run a ‘boyfriend destroyer’ scheme and sow such discord for his own personal distemper on a dozen, two dozen, women? Is this man above forgiveness in spite of his personal insight and professed regret?
Men can be so callous; it’s good to see the PUA/Seduction perspective finally come to real insight, because, Lord knows, no woman would ever be able to relate to such horribly damaging obsessions, right?
Post Edit:
OK, all snark aside, my intent with this was a comparative in a similar vein as my Qualities of the Prince post.
When you use exactly the same words and narrative women use with the genders flipped you begin to see the code in the Matrix. I purposely left the original article link at the end because the interpretation of how horrible and denigrating a man exhibiting such behaviors and rationalizing them needed to be expected and believed by default.
However, the real issue here isn’t so much Gilbert’s overt embracing of Open Hypergamy, it’s the degree to which she expects a fem-centric pop-culture not just to forgive her for it, but to redefine it as a necessary growth step in the maturation of a woman.
As most of you figured out, it’s (an albeit delayed) Epiphany Phase rationalization that all women have to confront eventually. The only difference here is the heroic narrative context. When a man spins plates, even with the most open and honest approach to being non-exclusive, he’s typecast as a monster, a predator, a player and a cad –and those are the nice adjectives.
But have a woman spin plates (as all of them do to varying degrees), and she’s a hero for her journey of self-discovery. Have a look at the comments on Gilbert’s original article. I even incorporated a few into the end of my post.
“This was a beautifully written, wise and brave account.”
“Too many men are punished, and quietly punish themselves, for what is indeed our birthright: human complexity”
As Open Hypergamy becomes more widely accepted, and men’s cooperation with it becomes an expectation for men in “a mature adult relationship” the Feminine Imperative will progressively need to redefine the inherent duplicity of women’s sexual strategy and mold it into a personal strength of women. We can see this fluid redefining in this article and I expect in Gilbert’s next book.
Men will need to be made compliant to women’s overt Hypergamy and the first step is to make them accept it as a triumphant self-discovered strength in women. Men need to be taught to applaud women for the courage to embrace their Hypergamy openly, and any man who doesn’t love women more for it is a chauvinist / misogynist.
“Face it, you wanted to believe my parody was the real deal. Or should I quote your first posts?”
No sweetheart, I wanted so badly to laugh at your satire, but it cut too close to home and broke my heart.
“Men and women exist in complete symbiosis with each other. In order for the feminine to thrive and blossom, men must provide the protection necessary to make that happen.”
Oh, Really?
You didn’t get that memo on the difference between symbiosis and parasitism?
sym·bi·o·sis
Interaction between two different organisms living in close physical association, typically to the advantage of both.
A mutually beneficial relationship between different people or groups.
par·a·sit·ic
Habitually relying on or exploiting others.
insanitybytes22
June 26th, 2015 at 12:35 am
it cut too close to home and broke my heart.
So. You got beat by a woman who wanted him more. You may have met my LTR. She is determined that no other woman is going to take her man away. No matter what.
Maybe your surrender to your current man is not as complete as you think.
InsanityGGyttikGabrielJane, you ignorant slut.I turned 26 today.I urge all men in redpill realm not to take women seriously.For the past 2 years i had to build my character from scratch.I was fucked up…i struggled getting women.Then, the harsh bitter truth came.I wasn’t dominant enough.I read alot from Rollo…read about Rooshs’ sexual conquests….participated in ROK and finally it struck! I improved my diet and visited the gym.This theoretically improved my testosterone levels.I could approach easily, my facial hair was more dominant.I read Robert greene and realized that we are all operating on biological levels.Once i realized that i became redpill.
“So. You got beat by a woman who wanted him more. You may have met my LTR. She is determined that no other woman is going to take her man away. No matter what.” LOL! Do I sound like a woman who would get beat by another woman? Not even close. All is well and good there, better than good actually, the best it’s ever been. Makes me cry for all the rest. What makes me sad is that Tomassi’s satire is true of far too many men and it’s simply depressing to know that so many are so easily… Read more »
Dear Rollo Tomassi, Please check this: Tatjana in motherland (documentary) Miha Čelar,director and producer Astral film; 60 min; 2014 Ljubljana, Slovenia Press to playtrailer: http://www.dokweb.net/en/documentary-network/east-european-docs/tatjana-in-motherland-6990/ Tatjana in Motherland is a partly animateddocumentary essay about Slovenia and its men. It is a “documentary-tale” of howSlovenian society has been disintegrating in an invisible way. The story willunveil a Slovenian Oedipus archetype of the possessive martyr mother type andher relationship with her son, in which she through emotional manipulation, byconstantly creating feelings of guilt, burdens her son to such a degree, thathe remains dependant on her for the rest of his life. In order… Read more »
@BC
HA! I love it…..tried and true.
@Rollo
This post couldn’t be passed up. Thanks for inserting it. You’re f…ing awesome.
@all
A great read off the current specific subject but well worth the time considering the overall subject – “What Every Body Is Saying” by Joe Navarro.
insanitybytes22 June 26th, 2015 at 12:52 am But that is your illusion. Women are NOT deceived. They know the smell of strong testosterone when they encounter it. And there may be other more minor flavors that influence their decisions. But deceived? You just want to sell that because for most women desire is an occasional thing. It is in your interest to pretend “deception”. I can remind the LTR of her desire and she can remember it. But most of the time as she puts it “I’m not paying attention.” Men OTOH pay attention to their desire all the time.… Read more »
You know when the LTR doesn’t forget her desire? When there is another woman actively chasing me. Then her desire is ON all the time. Turning on her desire is the basis of “dread Game”. My Dad – who was a natural – played “dread Game” with my Mom all the time. It took me until I read about it here that I understood. Despite the fact that I had been playing “dread” with the LTR since the beginning.
“What makes me sad is that Tomassi’s satire is true of far too many men and it’s simply depressing to know that so many are so easily deceived and sell themselves short in the process.” You got the satire 180 degrees wrong. You have no insight into the narrative. It is true of far to many women. AWALT. It is depressing that women are like dogs chasing after a car. What if the catch it? Women act on their true natures. They don’t understand their imprinted hind brain. If you were to broach the subject of women’s dualistict strategy of… Read more »
insanitybytes22
June 26th, 2015 at 12:52 am
Sad for men that “score” a lot? Really? I’m sad for men that score rarely if at all. It is one of the reasons I comment here.
“But that is your illusion. Women are NOT deceived” Sure we are! Dumber than a box of rocks, just like men. There are tons of women who are deceived into believing their only worth and value comes from their sexuality. Feminism comes along and tells them they must empower themselves by having sex with multiple men they don’t even like for reasons they can’t even fathom. ” Men OTOH pay attention to their desire all the time.” Yes, so when they are deceived into believing their only worth and value comes from their sexuality, it’s especially cruel because biology also… Read more »
“M Simon June 26th, 2015 at 1:18 am You know when the LTR doesn’t forget her desire? When there is another woman actively chasing me. Then her desire is ON all the time. Turning on her desire is the basis of “dread Game”. My Dad – who was a natural – played “dread Game” with my Mom all the time. It took me until I read about it here that I understood. Despite the fact that I had been playing “dread” with the LTR since the beginning.” You do understand you are both speaking to the deaf ears and to… Read more »
sjfrellc
June 26th, 2015 at 1:33 am
I have been a blogger since Sept 11, 2004. I know a wall when I meet one. I like “tagging” walls. For amusement. I know it will get painted over. None the less it amuses me.
========
There must be something innate in women that prevents them from understanding their nature. My first GF was Red Pill (I was so damn lucky). I have never met another since. Not live. Not online. Nor can it be taught. Esp. to those who don’t want to learn.
“Sure we are! Dumber than a box of rocks, just like men.”
Shouldn’t you be on a mountain top somewhere? I know just the place for you to shout from. People couldn’t hear you for miles.
“Sure we are! Dumber than a box of rocks, just like men. There are tons of women who are deceived into believing their only worth and value comes from their sexuality. Feminism comes along and tells them they must empower themselves by having sex with multiple men they don’t even like for reasons they can’t even fathom.” Can’t you stick with one paradigm? Women’s only worth comes from their sexuality. A Truism you obviously revolt from. Feminism is a wish and a hope for the FI to keep everlasting frame and to rein in the masculine imperative. Good luck with… Read more »
I know this is intended as script-flipped satire but it still hit way too close to home for comfort. Lack of identity, confused perception of self, and poor impulse control is what led me to TRM way back when. I’ve since found answers to all my questions except one: this constant sense that one day I will slip and raw emotion will spill out, dragging me through a wild joyride that will not, like the last, end in deep self-reflection. Despite everything the manosphere has managed to explain, I still haven’t seen this question addressed: what does one do if… Read more »
insanitybytes22
June 26th, 2015 at 1:24 am
Biology doesn’t care. Reproduction encourages reproduction. It is in fact a kind of magic.
Women want to reproduce with men who are into reproduction. It improves the offspring’s chances of reproduction.
No deception involved.
All M/F relations spring from that central cause. Deus ex machina.
@Rollo #The fact that I disagree with you does not make me a troll. #I don’t understand this game you’re playing. I post under ‘Chokmah’, PER YOUR RULES, and you censor me. I post under fruit, and you retroactively change my handle to ‘Chokmah’. WTF? I’m happy to post under the handle of ‘Chokmah’ (which you assigned to me), if you will agree to not censor it. I understand that you don’t like me. However, I am one of your readers. I get that I challenge you—that’s the point. If you don’t like that, then officially mod your comments, like… Read more »
Kazaul
June 26th, 2015 at 1:53 am
The way past the fear is to give it up. There is nothing to live up to. When I was young I wanted “an interesting life”. I got it. The very best thing you can do in the midst is “pay attention”. The highest price ever demanded. Which is why so few pay it.
“what does one do if one knows a taste of power will lead to an insatiable desire for more? ”
Move to Argentina.
Insane – “Yes, so when they are deceived into believing their only worth and value comes from their sexuality, it’s especially cruel because biology also encourages that deception.” Given that our sexuality is all women genuinely appreciate it makes a certain amount of sense. You appreciate nothing of men except what they do for you, and of course nothing is ever good enough. If we take a moment and assume you’re typical then a man’s sexuality is the only place where he can benefit from a woman. I’m sure you think do all sorts of good for men. But nagging,… Read more »
Holy shit. I take a little vacation and I come back and Insanity is still whipping every dead horse she can dig out of the cold, cold ground. Totally amusing but also a little sad.
@Rollo
Hilarious and innovative post with a provocative twist. Well played.
Dude, you’re weak. And you know it. Do your thing. I don’t make a habit of aggressing weaker biological organisms. But, given all the shit you talk to others, you merit an exception to the rule.
kfg
June 26th, 2015 at 2:12 am
LOL.
Rollo I’m having trouble understanding the purpose of this post/satire. I was actually connecting with it personally (before I knew it was written by a female). I guess it shows me that a girl in fact does have a similar sexual mindset as men in some instances? I never understand how to control the destiny of it all once you form a relationship with a girl. Is it simply trust that the girl will follow in your footsteps? Abundance mentality allows you to do this safely, but even then, every human has emotions and is hurt when things fall apart.… Read more »
There’s something to be said about a woman who derives pleasure from being castigated by strange men online.
For her own psychological well being the ban hammer would be appropriate.
It’s one thing to toy with someone, it’s something altogether different to fuck with someone.
Concerning Roosh finding God, it has to be remembered Islamic tradition holds that men progress through 4 stages, 0-33, 33-40, 40-60, and 60 onwards. It’s common for more progressive Muslims to play it up before 33 (drinking, eating pork, drugs, screwing around etc.) but they are expected to fly the straight and narrow after 33. Seems like Roosh is going to script. Also the proxy attack by Matt via Rok on MGTOW was to be expected, social isolationism, celibacy and monasticism is severely frowned upon by Islam. It is seen as an abrogation of the natural duty to procreate and… Read more »
Facebook just released some research they’ve been compiling. Most telling about the social media culture? 70% of comments on Facebook are left by people who only read the headline – they never click through to the article. Lol, I mean, fuck me – doesn’t that explain everything about what we deal with online? I’m in the digital world so this doesn’t surprise me completely, but still – and than this? With Insanity demonstrating she didn’t read the article or bother getting it at all? There are many meta factors driving us into the ditch. The advent of info-tainment and pop-ideology… Read more »
@I’m surprised the larger importance of this hasn’t come up in the comments. This story in the NYTimes completely debunks the subtext of the Eat, Pray, Love narrative as the implication of the story is that she needed to liberate herself somehow from her marriage, not that she was incapable of being faithful and suffered from severe behavioral problems and perhaps deep psychological issues. The whole vibe of the first novel is a woman who is on a spiritual journey to find her authentic self, lol. Nope, it was just her hitting the “Epiphany” phase. Western women were besotted by… Read more »
The satire here is quite rich. The first thing that jumped out at me is that I don’t know a single man who’s life fits the narrative presented in this story. I actually have never met a man in real life who ran a “boyfriend destroyer” campaign on a woman. The men I know who fuck a lot of women don’t work that hard. They fuck women who have BFs or husbands but they don’t run campaigns to do so. Men are much more opportunistic. No, in men, the campaigners are the White Knighting Blue Pillers who watch her riding… Read more »
This article reveals that Gilbert is an evil bitch of mind-boggling proportion, yes?
Just had to share this as I laughed so hard I cried. This woman demonstrates the intellectual sophistication and depth of today’s “strong, independent woman™” to a T. She’s about as bright as InsanityBytes.
Watch it, I promise it’s well worth it.
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSBS8gpOxqg&w=560&h=315%5D
@scribblerg
“The men I know who fuck a lot of women don’t work that hard. They fuck women who have BFs or husbands but they don’t run campaigns to do so. Men are much more opportunistic.”
That was the tell.
“This article reveals that Gilbert is an evil bitch of mind-boggling proportion, yes?”
Yes. And you have summed it all up very nicely.
Subbing to comments
I have plenty of intellectual curiosity, too much in fact.
You have the curiosity of a two-year-old, and the intellectual depth to match.
Men and women exist in complete symbiosis with each other.
In a real patriarchy a man and a woman might live complementarily.
In our current FI-dominated society, no way in h311. And no way to all men exist in complete symbiosis with all women. You are only a silly girl.
Yes, so when they are deceived into believing their only worth and value comes from their sexuality, it’s especially cruel because biology also encourages that deception.
Silly girl, do you have a testosterone level anywhere near as high as men? So what do you know about men’s desire? Silly, silly girl.
“Make your wife’s happiness your priority. Treat her like she’s your customer.”
lolz Exactly back-@$$wards. You want your wife to pursue you like you’re her customer. All the fakking time. Then, she will desire you. Even insanitybytes knows this.
My maxim: “Chasing wife, happy life.”
Rollo’s piece had to be done, thanks for that. But if you look at the original, it ends with her not going with the man. If you ask me, her story says she didn’t change much if at all. And if she would, it would be from age and not getting it anymore past the wall.
@M Simon: “The way past the fear is to give it up.” Thank you. I should have thought through what I was saying before I said anything, seeing as fears are generally irrational. This would be one of those few last cases where age-old programming hang me up. The nuances are really in the details. Uncover one batch and you realize there’s another layer waiting to be picked at. Sooner or later I’l be shaking my head when I remember ever having asked that question, and instead have ten more that seem far more relevant. Growing and (re)learning really is… Read more »
“I’ve more or less frozen my emotional life in an attempt to find a better solution. But the longer I search the more it seems there is no alternative; either I live with my worst or I remain stuck in this half-aware existence I’ve created, never truly content, and always looking for a better answer.” That’s because people are so much more than just our biology. Red pill nonsense teaches men to avoid what they really need the most, love, intimacy with women, and a spiritual life. Look at how demeaning and dismissive it is to treat people as if… Read more »
@Kazaul “I’ve since found answers to all my questions except one: this constant sense that one day I will slip and raw emotion will spill out, dragging me through a wild joyride that will not, like the last, end in deep self-reflection.” It sounds like you’re afraid of your own impulses and abilities. Don’t be, the best you can do is to trust them. Really, it’s by pulling back from your moment-to-moment emotions and experiences that you begin to trap yourself in this box you’ve constructed around yourself – where you begin to feel the need to manipulate, to vampirize,… Read more »
“The satire here is quite rich. The first thing that jumped out at me is that I don’t know a single man who’s life fits the narrative presented in this story. I actually have never met a man in real life who ran a “boyfriend destroyer” campaign on a woman. The men I know who fuck a lot of women don’t work that hard. They fuck women who have BFs or husbands but they don’t run campaigns to do so. Men are much more opportunistic. No, in men, the campaigners are the White Knighting Blue Pillers who watch her riding… Read more »
@Insanity Have you read Rollo’s second book where he outlines women in their stages of life? He lays it out pretty well. This article he linked to fits the patern he describes in the book exactly. Congratulations to her. She finally decided to get of the cock carousel. Now we should all marvel at how brave she has been and how much she has grown. Rollo lays this stage out very well in the book. The next step in her evolution is to find some beta schlub to have starfish sex with twice a month as she convinces him how… Read more »
insane – “Red pill nonsense teaches men to avoid what they really need the most, love, intimacy with women, and a spiritual life.” Let’s parse that a bit… Love: men need to love women idealistically, sacrificially, for as long she is willing to put up with that. Intimacy: men need to be emotional tampons for their women, and never bother women with their own emotional needs, a man having emotional needs burdens women with having to do something other than focus on her own emotions. Spiritual life: preferably a churchian, fem-centric sort that ensures a missionary only sex life and… Read more »
@Will There’s a few things going on here, but ‘Is This Thing On?’ right above me points out one of the major aspects of this satire. If you resonate with the article, you, as a man, should never let on as much. You can be a beta chode provider or you can be an unapologetic player and people will be fine, but if you’re an apologetic player woman will flip their shit. If you’re a woman and you pull the whole ‘I’ve learned so much about myself, that’s the old me’ script, you’ll fall into the arms of a nice… Read more »
Men and women were not designed to live their lives as nothing more then sexual commodities, endless exploiting each others psychology, gaming each other. That really is emotional vampirism and in the end it will leave you empty and unfulfilled and full of regret. Rollo isn’t telling men not to love. He is saying not to love idealistically. You misunderstand his position, perhaps like you do most things in the manosphere. Rollo also isn’t saying that romantic relationships should only be viewed through a commodity lens, but that is a very helpful view for analysis when bartering is involved (think… Read more »
May I ask aquestion? I have changed some details in an effort to be anonymous. I’m a 35year old male. I have recently been diagnosed with a serious disease. I have not been on this forum for a while. I have been through rough times… I had a girlfriend that lied and I was always suspicious of. She lied about her exes, her internet activity, her interest in me etc. We broke up because I was suspicious continuously( very ugly on my part), but I was right. She never stopped taking to other men. She never let go of her… Read more »
@Pretty Horses, I feel you brother. Have a read here:
http://therationalmale.com/2014/09/29/a-new-hope/
Well played, Mr. Tomassi, well played.
Consider, given the pattern of Gilbert’s behavior, that she’s not telling the truth now either. I can only imagine the depraved sexuality she engaged in and how insane and vicious she must have been to be married too. Such women can be violent too, I wonder how she comes down on that count? I’d love to hear her husband’s story, I bet it’s a doozy. Here’s someone who might be Gilbert’s sister – Courtney Love. She very likely killed Kurt Cobain, watch this story. It’s odd, Love also makes an appearance in Strauss’s The Game and I don’t think he… Read more »
@horses (mwb?) Christ, man. Read this first. http://therationalmale.com/2013/11/13/empathy/ It’s not that women can’t love, it’s that they love opportunistically. That can seem very cold to men who are left in a vulnerable place, but that’s why we emphasize internalizing self-worth here; it’s resilient to setbacks in your life that can cause women to scuttle for cover like rabbits. And stop asking for forgiveness for seeking empathy. The shame is pouring off of you. It’s not shameful to desire pity or empathy from a woman, though it is foolish. It’s neither shameful nor foolish to desire empathy from other men if… Read more »
@Kazaul – Yeah, I didn’t say the social media behavior was limited to women, read more carefully before you go out of your way to correct someone for something they didn’t say. As for the rest it, methinks you need more Red Pill. @alltheprettyhorses – You have a serious case of Oneitis – it’s not complicated. Being so sick, I get it, you just want someone to take care of you. But my experience is that this is where women are at their worst with men, not their best. When I became ill, the women in my life turned on… Read more »
scribblerg
June 26th, 2015 at 6:52 am
That was hilarious. Especially – the meme “the government controls everything”.
@horses Its a cold, hard, and lonely seat at the head of the table. It was and has always been, in your own power to live life on your terms and not cowering under the shadow of anyone else much less a predatory member of the slattern sorority. This isn’t your failure likely, but it IS a failure of discernment all the same. If you truly are this physically shot to shit, then your feelings should be of withdrawal, like a sick dog under the porch. If it’s just fear of the psychological (ie: lonliness), then that CAN be fixed… Read more »
insanitybytes22
June 26th, 2015 at 9:52 am
Red pill nonsense teaches men to avoid what they really need the most
Well no. It teaches men how to get it. The real deal. Not just “I’ll put up with you for regular delivery of the groceries and a roof”.
@Forge – More on the empathy and women’s opportunistic love. For me, it seems the my entire conception of romantic love was the problem. Me sacrificing and earning it and being worthy and supplicating myself before women and the like. I’m not sure what “idealized” love is – unconditional love? It doesn’t exist – I guarantee that. All love it conditional, and really the entire idea is sick. I may “love” someone in that I care for them, but for me to actively have someone in my life that I love, that has to be a two way street. Could… Read more »
@M. Simon – She’s likely a social justice warrior.
Loved the creativity in this post. It’s also entertaining how it went completely over some people’s heads. Is it just me or did anyone else hear a 747 fly by?
@ scribblerg
“Could it be that women have conned us into believing that this visceral desire for the comfort and love of a woman is “love” when it’s really just like a junkie craving a fix?”
Yes.
Just added an update to the post now that the jig is up.
@Scribblerg: with you most of the way but a little pushback: Courtney Love did not murder Kurt Cobain by shooting him in the belly or mixing cocaine with his heroin or heroin with his cocaine or insecticide with his quinoa. That’s a whole fanboy thing: “someone as great as Kurt being the great songwriter and generational spokesman he was who was loved by millions, he couldn’t possibly have topped himself”. But sadly, he was that depressed and he did. You look at his mega-fucked background growing up and you wonder he didn’t do it sooner. Which does not let the… Read more »
“Could it be that women have conned us into believing that this visceral desire for the comfort and love of a woman is “love” when it’s really just like a junkie craving a fix?” No, but it could be that you have conned yourselves into believing that you can try to pour women into the abyss of your souls and feel “full,” not unlike a junkie. The is the inherent deception. “I guess that women just can not love. It is painful but I’m learning to accept it. I feel like shit never mind you. I have no idea why… Read more »
@prettyhorses
Someone get this guy into triage stat, got me tearing up and shit
@insanity
Let the man be, your kind has already done so much hurt to our fellow brother
when @insanity blogs the truth it is quite powerful:
“In between, I careened from one website entanglement to the next — dozens of them — without so much as a day off between postings. You might have called me a serial debater except that I was never exactly debating. Postings overlapped, and those overlaps were always marked by exhausting theatricality: sobbing arguments, shaming confrontations, broken logic. Still, I kept doing it. I couldn’t not do it.”
@Scribblerg I suppose when I say ‘idealized love’ I mean something other than expecting love to be unconditional or anything like that. It’s more like, men tend to start by having an abstract concept of what ideal love would look like. And then, depending on how optimistic or pessimistic they are, they have a greater or lesser expectation of being able to manifest that sort of love in reality – although even the most optimistic of men would realize, upon reflection, that actually unconditional love or perfected love isn’t really possible. Women, even alpha widows, don’t really seem to process… Read more »
“Could it be that women have conned us into believing that this visceral desire for the comfort and love of a woman is “love” when it’s really just like a junkie craving a fix?” The junkie craving for a fix has a lot of truth regarding love. But it’s not necessarily women producing that believe, the junkie does it all be himself. And if you ask me, love is nothing but submission. It’s for females. “Come on you guys, give this guy something to hold onto. Tell him he is greatly loved, tell him that those feelings of being discarded… Read more »
Rollo, from the OP – “As Open Hypergamy becomes more widely accepted, and men’s cooperation with it becomes an expectation for men in “a mature adult relationship” the Feminine Imperative will progressively need to redefine the inherent duplicity of women’s sexual strategy and mold it into a personal strength of women. We can see this fluid redefining in this article and I expect in Gilbert’s next book. Men will need to be made compliant to women’s overt Hypergamy and the first step is to make them accept it as a triumphant self-discovered strength in women. Men need to be taught… Read more »
“Let the man be, your kind has already done so much hurt to our fellow brother” “My kind” would be wrapping the man in a giant hug, pouring words of encouragement and praise over him, assuring him that he is not alone, that he is seen and known and greatly loved. My kind would be telling him he has worth and value, that we will hold his hand and comfort him as best we can until he gets through this, and that he will get through it because he is even stronger than he can imagine. That is what “my… Read more »
Feedback on the above would be great btw, I’m just thinking aloud. Don’t have a solid concept of it all just yet.
@alltheprettyhorses Forge the Sky and scribblerg already gave some great advice. I will add my bit, since I’ve been where you are to some extent. Just to give you some background, around the time I turned 32 (I’m 50 now), I got cancer (fortunately, a highly treatable kind) and was undergoing chemotherapy and all of the other shit that goes with that, while also going through a bitter divorce that took around 18 months to finalize. I was living several hours away from friends and family as well. I also was not well off financially, so I had to work… Read more »
Insanity’s trying to antagonize us. No surprise.
By my count, 5 guys have piled support on prettyhorses in the last two hours, yet she’s shrieking about how we’re not treating him kindly enough or something.
Anything to create fear, uncertainty, doubt I guess.
Or hopefully even anger. Oooh, the tingles!
insane – “Tell him he is greatly loved, tell him that those feelings of being discarded and unwanted shall pass. Tell him that the pain of loneliness can also be perceived as the pleasure of solitude. Drop the red pill crap for a moment and tell him that it’s okay to want and believe in love. Then show him some, will you?” He’s a man. He can handle the truth. Pretty lies, and false hope are the realm of women. Real heroism requires actual pain and lethal risk, you wouldn’t understand, you can’t. From pain comes strength, again you can’t… Read more »
“And if you ask me, love is nothing but submission. It’s for females”
Yes, powerful words there, love really is submission, but men are called to the same! Men were called to love, too! In faith men submit to God, the ultimate source of love, and they reflect that back out into the world. In the absence of faith however, I have no idea how you would go about doing that.
Start here and read through:
http://therationalmale.com/2011/12/27/women-in-love/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/09/10/men-in-love/
http://therationalmale.com/2012/09/11/of-love-and-war/
http://therationalmale.com/2014/05/06/intersexual-hierarchies-part-i/
http://therationalmale.com/2014/05/13/intersexual-hierarchies-part-ii/
http://therationalmale.com/2015/01/05/the-love-experience/
http://therationalmale.com/2015/01/02/commodifying-love/
http://therationalmale.com/2015/03/20/idealism/
Read all the way through these, don’t skim, don’t skip.
Insanity wants a man to unfuck himself by forgiving and accepting himself and nurturing his flaws now eh?
Is this Jezebel? Some fucked up feminized mega church newsletter?
BPD right here boys, look really really close and teach your sons.
scribblerg
June 26th, 2015 at 11:49 am
– unconditional love?
Not even your Mother will love you that much if you screw up bad enough.
Horses,
If you live in a place conducive – look up cannabis. First for pain relief. Second for healing.
The fix for broken hearts:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uVyBRdBVCiU
@alltheprettyhorses
https://youtu.be/iItgeWUeQ_4
When I was going through my shit and felt all woe is me, I watched this.
Rollo,
the Feminine Imperative
What these c*nts are too blind to see is that they will come to hate the culture they are creating. You see it some already in the women running to ISIS to escape the culture. Not that it will make them happy. But they imagine – “Manliness, full bore, I’m wet already.”
At least Clint Eastwood and Harrison Ford are still alive. But the echo of that era is getting fainter.
@M Simon – They are too blind. Imagine the euro-feminist rationalizations when they are forced to wear burquas and join harems. It isn’t a coincidence the most ‘gender equal’ countries have poor fertility and unchecked immigration from Islamic countries. It is cultural nihilism.
lh
June 26th, 2015 at 12:49 pm
Of course you give the junkie another fix – until you can heal his pain.
People in chronic pain chronically take pain relievers.
Everything they teach you in popular culture about “addiction” is wrong. Every damned thing.
@All The Pretty Little Horses: “I will not keep posting.”
Wrong answer. You will keep posting. You will keep asking questions. You will keep us informed.
All these posts are hammering the subject home and it’s making me sick. Actually I’m serious, as I read Rollo’s books, the manipulated man and many many more I finally saw what you call the Matrix. I thought I could digest the red pill and absorbed all this knowledge but now after 2 years I’m suffering from Red-Pill-sickness. Here’s my story and I’ll keep it as short as I can: I grew up with two loving parents, but even though my father was very controlling he was also very beta. So I inherited all the wrong traits, complete betahood. I… Read more »
Courage Every man commenting here is at least an incipient Alpha. You all know the stats. For every blogger there are ten commenters and a hundred readers. Sometimes even more skewed than that. One hundred commenters and a thousand readers. Why don’t most people comment? Fear. “I will be seen to be ignorant.” “I will be seen to be a fool.” “Someone will say bad things about me.” So everyone in the discussion has at least risen a little above his fear. Build on that courage. My greatest fear was that I lacked courage. I put myself through all kinds… Read more »
that comic is gold.
kfg
June 26th, 2015 at 2:31 pm
I wrote my June 26th, 2015 at 2:43 pm before I saw yours. Excellent advice for Horses.
Anonymous
June 26th, 2015 at 2:42 pm
Once your illusions are destroyed they are not coming back. You still have 20, 30, 40 years to run. Start practicing Game. You will get better at it. And if along the way some woman decides she is not going to let you go. Well let her hold on if you like her. But never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, do the holding on yourself. It will destroy her desire.
@Insanity, men who are in a world of hurt don’t want smoke blown up their ass about how everything is fine. For the record, he is no longer alone because he came here. Men here can have his back, but we do it by saying “Dude, that sucks”, not issue out a bunch of empty platititudes.
He may get a bit of tough love here, but we will walk away with more realistic expectations. Realistic expectations will bring him more hapiness than simply plugging him back into the blue pill matrix.
@Rollo Proof of the FI. From sjfrellc: “I have no lack of spiritual life, I have a great sense of identity, incredible feelings of self worth. Red pill awareness and game has rekindled my sense of intimacy.” Live for yourselves brothers! @Seedless I said your customer model is bad, PARTNER was more analogous. Okay then how about stupid? You wife as ‘customer’ is to narrow and limiting . . ‘customer’ doesn’t work, it requires roles to be flipped depending on circumstance. . . . From The Peackeepers ; “In July I’ll have been married for 16 years. Mrs. Tomassi and… Read more »
@Fred – From what you wrote it seems to me you didn’t watch the video because you didn’t cite any of the damning evidence presented. But I don’t want to spend much time on it – I’m content that the former police chief of the town he was killed in says he would re-open the investigation for sure. But I have no horse in the race and don’t want to debate it, let’s just agree to disagree. Her behavior is BPDish for sure, maybe much worse.
Anonymous June 26th, 2015 at 2:42 pm: “. . . it’s making me sick.”
You are in the penultimate, and, I’m afraid, the most difficult phase of digesting the red pill. Like many medicines it is a poison. It will kill the beta, but it will make you sick in the process. At times you will feel that the cure is worse than the disease, but you are actually on the verge of winning through.
Keep your eyes on the prize, hold on.
I like your term “Overt Hypergamy” better than Open Hypergamy
@Insanity – I engage you against my better judgment. But maybe you can get this. Why aren’t any of the women in @horses life “wrapping the man in a giant hug”? Where are the real women in his life supporting him in this terrible time of need?
I also find it incredibly arrogant of you to tell us to “show the guy some love” – we are doing exactly that. The comments are all supportive and encouraging of him – yet you just pretend that isn’t so.
You are a really sick person.
@Forge – Great stuff on love, I was thinking there is some maternal basis. But I’m going to go back and reread the posts Rollo cited and digest first. I’ll comment on your thoughts at that time too.
@Anonymous – I hear you buddy. It’s horrific to have the old set of books ripped away. But it really is pretty basic. It’s the illusions that make us crazy – not the reality of it. The reality is that resourceful and resilient man can build his skills/value/assets and find a place where he can build mastery at something in some social setting. A man can assert himself with women so as to create a proper frame going forward. I mean, the choice of going back to supplicant and servitude, well to me, that’s no choice at all. I’d literally… Read more »
@scribblerg:
I didn’t cite the video, I’d seen some of it and read other articles summarizing it. We’ll have to agree to disagree on it; in my view, it’s a damn sad story, but Occam’s Razor solves the problem, as it does other high profile mysteries. But I think we can agree on your key point: BPD is BPD, and it can be fatal. I just cited a different example, behavior that the woman herself descants upon, as noted. That aside, I agree with everything else you said.
In case you didn’t know, “Insanitybytes” is a tenacious troll previously banned from Vox Day’s blog. Gabrielle Guthrie, a grandmother. For shame.
Dalrock’s too. She is riding the spam fence here too, but she’s a useful idiot.
@Anonymous: Scribblerg’s advice is the shit, believe it man and check the cited sources. Meanwhile here is a simple Game exercise born out of method acting improv classes and assertiveness training. Not claiming as my invention, of course, others talk about it at greater length. Here it is: set yourself the goal of starting conversations with 10 women every day. Talk about the weather. What favorite flavor coffee you like in the shop you’re in. The best or worst stores in the shopping mall. Anything. The goal is not to get a number or a date or to ask for… Read more »
@Stuttue….
Your comment of 9:37 was dead on. Realizing you have bigger and better things in your life to pursue than endlessly pursuing skirt is a huge leap of thinking. And by concentrating on bettering his own life, a man mus necessarily de-pedistalize a woman, and redirect the energies formerly spent on attention and validation back to himself.
@Badpainter
Yeah, I noticed the Freudian slip on IB22’s part, “I really, really, wish you advocated being masculine for the benefit of feminine females”
Cat, bag, out. And while i hate feeding a troll, I really wish she does stay. Rollo’s right in keeping a non moderated discussion going, as the occasional bone-headed comment goes a long way towards illustrating the article.Not only that, it’s hilarious to read someone who refuses to Just Get It.