Qualities of the Prince

You know, I’m not quite sure if my readership is aware of this, but I’m a Prince. No really, I’m a Prince (stop laughing), or at least that’s the expectation I’ve come to have others recognize in me after sifting through women’s online profiles on such fantastical dating resources such as Plenty of Whales Fish and OK U-Bid Cupid. But don’t think I’m such a rare bird, because amazingly enough, if you’re reading this blog, you’re probably a Prince too! And you didn’t even realize it did you?

You see, virtually all the women you encounter on these Buffers online dating resources are simply undiscovered, under-appreciated jewels in the rough. They’re Princesses, and goddammit they deserve to be treated as such. Just reading through each profile is like going on safari and encountering a virtual cornucopia of rare and exotic animals (kind of like a zoo), each meticulously described in encyclopedic detail of their uniqueness and rarity of finding. What mere mortal man could possibly deserve to touch such feminine refinery?

A few years ago the denizens of the SoSuave forum accidentally conducted one of the most humorous social experiments ever performed. A member by the handle of Bonhomme was a frequenter of Plenty of Fish and noticed an interesting trend in women’s profiles. Though most of the women using online dating run the gamut from hopelessly fat to 2-drink fuckability, the one thing most had in common was an entirely overblown sense of self-worth to compliment their grossly overrated self-impression of their sexual market value (SMV for those of you playing the home game). This is nothing shocking for unplugged Men; the ‘community’ has long held that social media and online Buffers work in tandem to convince a woman she’s 1 to 2 degrees higher on her SMV scale. What hadn’t been studied up to then was the descriptors and qualifications that online women used in both their “list of demands” and their own self-evaluations, or “the brochure of value added features” any man with common sense (see fem-centric conditioning) would ever be considered a ‘Man’ for appreciating in a woman.

The following is an example pulled from a typical profile:

Here is a well thought out idea of what kind of guy I am interested in… 5’10″ or taller, lives near by, compassionate, intelligent, giving, VERY Attractive (someone other than your mother or sister has said so, lol) and in shape, prefer self employed, FAMILY orientated, open to new spontaneous things, likes to camp, likes to golf, wants children, would be a good father and faithful husband, a gentleman, gives me my space when I need it, not a nerd or too sarcastic, can take a hint, social, calls for no reason, remembers sending a note or a nominal gift IS romantic and necessary, respectful, sense of humor, and thinks the world of me. I am not interested in anyone older than 41 and anyone who makes less money than me since I do not plan on changing the lifestyle I have grown accustom to and hope to one day be a stay at home mom and furthermore… my children will never want for ANYTHING (but of course will not be spoiled brats either lol). You should also love animals  I am not attracted to red heads at all lol sorry.

Wow! A rare find indeed. Thank heaven for the internet in providing men such a valuable resource that we might encounter such rational and strong women as this. This is one common example, but by far the most common self-references women made involved the word “Princess” – “I’m a Princess waiting for my Prince” or “I’ll admit it, I’m a Princess, I just need to find a man who can appreciate that and treat me right.”

Well, far be it from Rollo J. Tomassi to deny these undiscovered royals their due! Quickly I began to craft a cunning profile of my own; one which these pouting Princesses would surely recognize as that of none other than the Crown Prince of Man-dom. Using their own profile’s jingoisms and idioms as a template, I established an idealized persona, one that any woman worth her equalist “common sense” salt would instantly be irresistible to,…

Here is a well thought out idea of what kind of gal I am interested in…5′ 5″ or taller, but not over 6 feet (because while I don’t mind being eye to eye with you, I won’t ever be looking up to you), lives close enough to be at my house within 10 minutes after I make the call, genuinely passionate, intelligent enough to be good company, sexually available (preferably insatiable) and VERY attractive – we’re talking Jessica Alba, Keyra Augustina attractive – women with a body-fat percentage higher than 8% need not apply. Must be employed but not so well as you’ll interfere with our sexual activities, FAMILY oriented, but only after you’ve hit 30-33, open to spontaneous sex (you know, like outdoor stuff or a surprise 3 way with one of your hot girlfriends after our 2nd martini), likes to camp (in the nude), knows not to complain when I go play golf with the clients from work.

She must want children after 33 years of age if at all, and only after she’s proven to be a good mother and faithful wife, must be a lady with class and know when the right time is to speak and not to speak, not a prude or bitch, can take the first hint, sociable, unexpectedly texts me pictures of her wearing something new from Fredericks of Hollywood, understands that the best gift she can give me is expressing her desire to fuck me like a wild animal, and also understands that gifts for her are treats or rewards for desired behavior.

Must be respectful of my decisions being final, can’t take herself too seriously and thinks the world of me. I’m not interested in anyone over 31 (since this is most women’s expiration date anyway), she cannot have exorbitant spending habits or a credit debtload in excess of $1,000 since I do not plan on changing the lifestyle I have grown accustom to and hope to one day be able to send my own children to college (rather than pay for your student debt), and furthermore… my children will be taught to reasonably earn their achievements on their own and respect the decisions of their Father and mother (and absolutely will not be spoiled brats either). I’m very attracted to redheads, blondes, brunettes, Latinas, Asians, African-Americans, Pacific Islanders, etc., pretty much any woman that meets my physical requirements. I am not attracted at all to even slightly fat women no matter how much “inner beauty” you think you may possess. Hope to meet you soon, your Prince.

There! What woman could possible fail to appreciate all of the qualities of a Prince based on their very own template? Insidious, clever and witty. All I had to do was await what could only be a landslide of returned affection and positive responses. I contemplated how I would have to let down the poor cast off Princesses who failed to meet my humble criteria as the first response came in,…

“I read your profile, and is any of it serious?????”

A bit perturbed I reply,

Why do you think it’s not serious? Am I not allowed to be a bit specific?

“Sorry not about to put up with your kind of shit.”

Strange and yet strange again. Here I’d learned that self-confidence and assertiveness were traits women admired in the land of gender-equalism. Ah, perhaps this Princess was a bit jaded by such a dearth of qualified Princes at her disposal. I waited a bit more and was rewarded by a Princess called ‘Lil Sweet Heart’ who’d randomly read my glowing self-description,..

“what a profile
see iam a strong willed person!!
i speak when i want to say what i want and when i want and the way ur profile sounds i dont we;d be a match and the part about raising a spoiled brat thats a hard one to over come depends what u see as spoiled sure my boys r a bit spoiled well a lot but thats the way i was raised and it did me no wrong my kids know that they have to work to earn their spending and treats but no reason why a parent cant buy something just because so maybe ur profile can off wrong but my feeling is not some one id wanna meet hmmmmm”

Egads! I respond,

“Honestly, I really tried to read your message to me, but all of the bastardized English and the run-on sentences made it virtually impossible to understand what you were trying to say.”

I do say. Whomever this royal child’s au pair was is deserving of a public scourging! The thought of so ill-preparing a Princess for courtly discourse with the Man who will one day be her King is inexcusable. Bah, the blazes with this one, I’ll be patient on another,..

“uh, yeah, i don’t think so. maybe your profile’s a joke (which would make it less sad), but i don’t find it amusing, not my sense of humour at all.and the fact that i’m even bothering to reply to say no, rather than just ignore you, should tell you how distasteful it is.happy hunting. (though you’d have better luck if you went back in time 100 years or so, have fun finding chics like that today)

After checking out your profile, you are one of the rudest people i’ve even encountered. In your dreams…”

Hmm, I was beginning to see a flaw in my profile design. You see I had simply reworded the profile of my original Princess’ profile and changed the gender specific terms to the masculine, while adding a bit of my own desires to the outline of the ideal Princess I’d like to meet. After all, they all want to be treated like Princesses, I’m just asking to be treated like a Prince. But,..perhaps I’d been remiss in my waiting for the Princesses to respond. How unmanning of me – I would seek out my prize and pursue her. This profile caught my eye,…

“I am friendly, outgoing, generous, loyal, honest and adventurous. I work in a hospital. I also drive and have my own car.
I love to get my nails done every two weeks. I love fashion and style. I care about pop culture and social issues.
I have an IQ of 146. I am extremely intelligent and educated.

First Date: I dont want to meet Cheaters, users, players, haters, crumb bumbs, guys who want booty calls or fuk buddies… ya’ll dont let the door hit cha on the way out… I guess Im looking to meet someone around my own age, who is taller than me preferably caucasian, attractive, who likes to work out, has a unique, ghetto and sarcastic sense of humor like me.”

Well, not the ideal prize I’d been seeking, but perhaps this was another jewel in the rough that just needed a bit of spit and polish. I respond in the affirmative to her brassy, assertive equalist nature. After reading my profile, she responds,..

“i mak emy own moneya nd pay for own 5hit.. and for someone with such high standards take a good look in the mirror becuz these girls aka jessica alba are way out of ur league… if u want someone who is hot at least BE hot urself!”

I found this confusing since I had no picture on my profile at this point. I’d have to address that, but strange that the assumption was that my physical stature would necessarily be inadequate for her. I respond,..

“Dear woman, for someone with such a high opinion of her intelligence your grammar, punctuation and syntax are far from reflecting this. You type like shite.”

What I’d found most entertaining of this whole affair is that these women somehow feel compelled to respond to the profile. As if it were some personal affront to their sensibilities that it should need their attention to correct, rather than simply move on to the next profile. Judging from the frequency and intensity of the responses, how many men do you suppose responded to the original woman’s profile with the same fervor?

One of the best ways to illustrate how insaturated feminization has become in society is to flip the gender script on certain gender-specific dynamics. As funny as all this was, it serves to show that women live and operate in gender assumptions that they simply take as normalized conditions. Were a Man to publicly expect the terms and demands for his own provisioning and intimate access that women demand without an afterthought, he’s instantly accused of misogyny at worst, comedy at best. There are many more dynamics that illustrate this fem-centric normalization. My critics get fits of hysteria when I describe the acculturated, feminine-centric undercurrent operating in society. Girl-world is the only world for them, so pulling back the iron-veil of the feminine reality like this is usually a hard revelation. Ironically it’s the vitriol engendered in the responses to my reworded profile that prove the point.


68 responses to “Qualities of the Prince

  • sporto

    This was funny as hell!! This is sad but very very true.

  • Anonymous

    *applauds*

    Perhaps the next step (escalation?) in the experiment is to find women with demanding requirements, copy and tweak their profile format to make it male, and then contact them to see their response. When they respond indignantly, explain what you did (sent them back a male version of their own profile) and ask why they think men would be any more attracted to their ‘princess’ profile as she was to yours. heh

  • Rollo Tomassi

    Oh, I’d encourage all my readers to participate in this entertaining and educational social experiment,…heheh.

  • Brian

    That is some Grade A awesome right there. I’m actually a little surprised that the responses you got weren’t far more hostile.

    My favorite type of profile on those sites usually consists of no more than 2-3 sentences that essentially say “I love movies, music, going out to eat, and spending time with my friends”. It’s like a window into their shallow, empty soul.

  • joemama

    meh. either the resume of the woman is important or not. what do you want her to say? that her main hobbies are keeping fit and taking domestic coursess on how to best serve her future man?

    if those 2-3 sentences are grammatically correct, free of typos, and coupled with stats like 23 years old, bachelors degree, 5’8-5’11, athletic body type, and some hot pictures…

    who cares?

  • Traveller

    Nice.

    “Plenty of Fish (whales?) ”
    Uh, whales are not fishes, they are mammals.

  • (r)Evoluzione

    Funny stuff.

    I’ve found overall that OK Cupid is a more sophisticated site, and attracts more intelligent, (and thus more SWPL) girls who tend to have the princess entitlement synrdome much worse, ironically making them easier to game but much worse for relationships.

    Contrast with POF, which tends to attract prole chicks. Urbanized prole chicks are probably the worst in terms of their taste in dress, vocabulary, food choices and thus hotness.

    However, if one can find the rare country girl whom hasn’t been ruined yet by urban culture–that’s a win. Unfortunately, many of them seem to want the urban ideals of the cubicle job and shopping on the weekends at Da Mall.

    I’m about to embark on a new mission on these sites. In the past, it’s been more for entertainment than any true attempt at dating. We’ll see how it goes.

  • Solo

    Brilliant Rollo, the more I mature in the game and see these things (conventions?) The more apperciative I am of your posts.

  • Doc

    ROFLMAO… Brilliant, absolutely brilliant, and so true… I did the on-line thing for a bit, to find that the photos were usually “15 years ago”, or “30-50 lbs ago”… Only once did I not “show up” – after scouting the “sea-cow” that paddled into the bookstore/deli we were meeting at – thankfully I spotted her and was able to make my escape. She broke the “30-50 lbs ago” rule by at least another 100lbs… My photo was what I look like – it never occurred to me to lie about something so obvious. I mean – why? Yet these women did it all the time… (I couldn’t believe that it was her but the outfit was distinctive, Of course on her it was more of a Muumuu – pronounced “moo-moo” and an oh so fitting name…)

    After that, I stuck with meeting women in real-life where I could see what I was getting. I knew that what women “say they want” and “what they are attracted to” are vastly different – but figured that if I could expand the number of women I met by using on-line, that would be useful – it wasn’t….

    I still don’t understand why women lie to themselves by listing things that they don’t find attractive, or value. Of course, saying that they wanted a man who will treat them like a sex object, and do it repeatedly at unexpected moments probably wouldn’t be good for their PR but would be a lot more accurate…

    Keep up the good fight…

  • mrchvz

    Haha! Excellent observations. I was doing an advanced search on pof just for shits and gigs and decided to do an experiment of my own. When I searched women and asked me about kids, I left it alone and got back hundreds of pages of results. Now I went back and selected “None” under the children field and received a paltry 15 pages. The women who are single moms suffer from the princess syndrome. It’s a damn shame.

  • Nas

    To see a funny example of having the gender script flipped, set up a dummy account on the seeking arrangement website and see the responses from the females. You can be as demanding as you want to be as a man and all these whores (quite literally) would still be trying to qualify themselves to you.

  • Flahute

    compassionate, intelligent, giving, VERY Attractive . . . . and in shape, FAMILY orientated, open to new spontaneous things, likes to camp, likes to golf, wants children, would be a good father and faithful husband, a gentleman, gives me my space when I need it, not a nerd

    Sounds like she wants a handsome beta who will adhere to her agenda. But we all know her perfect beta can be all this and she still won’t be happy.

    In my experience, I have found that a woman’s checklist goes out the window once she meets a guy that gives her the tingles.

    I’ve been seeing a woman (on the side) who is one of Rollo’s career girls, very intelligent, very successful, feels completely entitled to have everything, but you know what? When she’s with me it all falls away and she is just a woman. She gets demanding once in a while, but I just remind her who she is talking to, and she drops the attitude. She has actually said to me, “you know, I don’t know why, but I don’t mind your chauvinism.”

  • Rollo Tomassi

    Actually the orignal Princess’ profile requests of her ideal man are almost verbatim what Susan Walsh’s perfect beta husband would be. An adoring indentured servant able to ape the Alpha script on demand.

  • flyfreshandyoung

    This is brilliance.

    Nefarious, even.

    I’m going to launch my own experiment with my rusting PoF and OkC profs, should be fun.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    By all means, please do and report you results in this comment thread for clinical analysis.

    Heheh,..

  • Retrenched

    You see this a lot. Women posting their big laundry list of expectations for the ideal man that they “deserve”, while at the same time blasting any and all men who have any kind of standards at all as being “too shallow” or “immature”.

    In short, pickiness is seen as a virtue for women, but a vice for men. Every woman deserves the perfect man, while every man should be thankful for anything he can get.

  • deti

    +500, Retrenched. This is exactly what is going on all over this SMP. Women are dissatisfied at and reject any imperfection; while men should just shut up and take whatever they’re given. Any protests from men receive howls from women of “Shallow!” “Immature!” “You can’t handle a woman like me!” “Sexist pig!”

  • Muse

    break their expectations, play with them…become an unmoveable mass of masculinity in their world of chaos.

  • Muse

    they will spit, they will rant, rave and love, they will cry, scream and criticise but we will love them none the less…

  • (r)Evoluzione

    Thus the game technique of “qualification,” in flipping the script and mirroring the hamster, has much merit.

    It serves two functions: 1. it puts demanding women in their place. 2. it screens for women who have these traits to a minimum.

  • theprivateman

    Rollo, given your age, consider trying a new profile that stresses your willingness to commit to a relationship but at the same keeping your standards just as high.

    The princesses know they are the gatekeepers of sex. But a prince should know he is the gatekeeper of commitment. To communicate that in a profile would be the key.

    Perhaps a series of bullet points that lead with the phrase “I’m very willing to commit to a woman who is…” Then insert your preference/demand.

  • Good Luck Chuck

    In related news…..

    Today I saw a facebook post by a girl I used to bang a few years back. It was a picture of her boyfriend in a bathrobe at a spa, in a gayish pose with the caption “Such a good boyfriend”.

    I clicked on the comments and predictably one of her female friends chimed in with “did he seriously sit thought a spa treatment???SO well trained!”

    Next comment- “Nice work!!”

    Followed by “lmaoooooo”

    And finally “I wish my boyfriend would take me to the spa lol”

    Imagine the outrage if a guy were to post something equally demeaning. Like, a picture of her in an apron in the kitchen washing dishes with the caption “Such a good girlfriend” with a comment that says “is she really washing dishes??? SO well trained!”…..”Nice work!!”…”lmaoooo”….”I wish my girlfriend would wash the dishes lol”

    I guess it serves him right for treating one of my used up cum dumpsters to a day at the spa.

  • johnnymilfquest

    Rollo, I’m not seeing female POF profiles like that on this side of the Atlantic.

    UK women on POF tend to *underplay* their requirements. A recurring profile headline over here is “I just want a NORMAL man”.

    When pressed on the matter, they are forced to admit that he has to be normal PLUS tall, intelligent, athletic, good job, loves kids, etc.

  • Jim

    Women can dish it out, but they cannot take it. I have “turned the table” on women in many instances face to face and gave a response that is based on what she says all the time, just to see her reaction to the words she dishes out of her own mouth, and they cannot deal with it (their own words) in return (it’s like the little hamster can only run in one direction).

    I have learned to never listen to seriously or do anything a woman says. A problem with online dating sites is having to read the stupid stuff that women write (that the little hamster in her head says). Women are delusional. Many of the profiles of women on OKC and POF say things like, “You better never mention sex, and you better never try to do anything sexual with me. You must make a lot of money to take care of my 4 kids and 2 dogs. If you ever even just look at me sexually I will call the cops. Why do all the men on these sites call me HOT, never call me babe do you understand me. We are never having sex. You are a creepy pervert you sick man. My kids and dogs are more important to me than you. Now hand over all of your money.” There are so many of these stupid profiles by women that I have had enough of reading them. I have thought it would be funny if a woman could find out if one of the profiles she rejected and typed back an arrogant bitchy reply was in fact a celebrity man in real life that she would have swooned for and let him fuck her little brain out, but online she called him a loser creep and rejected him.

  • Kai

    And men tell you “Picky people don’t get to eat!” “Pussy is pussy, don’t be so damn choosy!”

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  • flyfreshandyoung

    Just finished crafting it for OkC.

    I set up a bunch of mid-level, somewhat strict qualifiers. Phase 1.

    Phase 2, if warranted: Harsh, Ultra qualifiers.

  • flyfreshandyoung

    Actually, Rollo, I’d like your input if you’ve got the time.

  • flyfreshandyoung

    Ok here I twitpic’d it-

    http://twitpic.com/82jjoz

    Can’t decide if it’s harsh enough or not, what do you think?

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  • necorochi

    Hahahaha this was awesome.

    Isn’t that just so messed up?

    Almost want’s to get you pissed.

    But why?

    It’s really a blessing in disguise.

    Use it to your advantage.

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  • Hephaestus

    Coming out of a LTR with a witch (spells and all), I would just point out that the term princess is obviously not empowering or desirable to todays second/third-wave feminist because of it’s social connotations.

    It has for a long time been successfully substituted with the word goddess because you can’t have a ‘true, authentic, spiritual’ inner-princess, so it must be replaced with something more easily internalized.

    Which has more references in 50 Shades of Grey? – There is a clear shift into the mainstream by that readership to accept the inner-goddess movement, especially by those that haven’t been exposed to it before.

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  • Bronan The Barbarian!

    Sheer troll brilliance. I love it.

  • M3

    Just caught this over from the AFC Project.

    I love this. I think i’m going to use send this link to every diseased fish on PoF i come across for $#!7s & giggles.

  • M3

    I’d like to add that this is the type of female profile you will find and abundance of here in Toronto.. for one specific reason. Skewed market value of said vagina’s. They can afford to put these lists out and demand adherence to them because hey.. guys are still chasing that shit and putting up with it. Guys are starved up here and pussy begging left right centre. Of course a woman doesn’t have to tolerate that shit or lists from men. Her reproductive system is important, yours is not. Her womb (and vagina) are in demand, your penis is not. so you will jump through her hoops and lists if you want the privilege of sniffing her twat, but fat chance she’ll put up with yours.

    unless you’re a saudi prince who uses his Bugatti offroad just because he feels like it. then her list vanishes and she’ll be begging to make him a sandwich buck naked in the kitchen.

    if the god damn men of my city stopped placating these online slores and just ghosted offline, you’d see how quick these harlots and their obscene lists would disappear begging for a sliver of attention.

    a quality woman doesn’t make lists. she interacts and explores looking for someone she enjoys spending time around whom she is also attracted to. stubborn rigid lists don’t allow for that.

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  • Kate

    My latest profile. I wonder if this makes me a princess.

    “If…

    you know the Kipling poem and live by it,
    you’d say something impolite if it was necessary and true,
    you’d rather sit next to me than across from me,
    you don’t think its strange I want to learn to shoot,
    you want to benefit from the cooking boot camp I’m taking this summer,
    you want to be with a woman who enjoys being one,
    we’d probably hit it off! :)”

  • Rollo Tomassi

    It’s not how I’d interpret your profile, but how you’d interpret mine.

  • FuriousFerret

    The reality version would be more like this:

    “If…

    you have a Ph.d and read Kipling and have other markers of intelligence,
    you are an alpha male that passes my shit tests and calles me out on if necessary,
    you aren’t a beta and have the balls to escalate,
    you are actually a guy and know how to fight,
    you are high value enough to expect a woman to cook you food,
    you aren’t a pussy that will put up with feminazis,
    then if for some reason you want to be with me instead of a 22 year old that’s totally awesome”

    By Kate

  • Kate

    In this profile, you sound like a man who knows what he wants but is unlikely to get it because the parameters are too narrow.

    A funny read :)

  • Kate

    Haha, very good Ferret! You “get it.”

  • Unending Improvement

    You gotta admit, it was pretty transparent.

  • koevoet

    “you know the Kipling poem and live by it”

    Whatever happens we have got,
    the Maxim gun and they have not.

    Check.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    Read through the article again, you’ve missed the point entirely.

  • FuriousFerret

    “Read through the article again, you’ve missed the point entirely.”

    That’s pretty par for the course for Kate.

    How Kate sees Rollo’s posts:

    “Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah HOW Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
    Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah TO Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
    Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah GET Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
    Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah AN Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
    Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah ALPHA Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
    Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah TO Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
    Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah COMMIT Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah”

  • Kate

    “Read through the article again, you’ve missed the point entirely.”

    And *you* don’t know how to use a semicolon ;) The article says women are too picky. What did I miss?

  • Rollo Tomassi

    *sigh* explaining the joke is the worst part,..

    My profile was simply the woman’s profile rewritten from a male perspective. Ergo women online are too good for themselves. Or in other words, you wouldn’t date yourself.

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  • Sal Ceech

    Rollo I read this a while back .. a girl suggested I check this dating site “guysdateforfree” .. with this post in mind I wrote this , … feedback by you and others are welcome ,appreciated

    Am out to have fun with mutual beneficial friends…kinda booty call with cuddling and waking up the next day.
    They are looking for
    Like minded woman between 20-60 who have proportioned shapes and builds.Height between 5 – 6 ft .Weight .. no more then 200 lbs not less then 100.status.. not involved in any exclusive relationships ( its uncool to take my fork and knife and cut meat from s someone else’s plate)If you have kids .. the connection will have a 6 month time limit .. if not maybe an extension.

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  • Alexander

    Jesus, this is the funniest thing I’ve read in a long time!

  • Tom

    lol… That was fantastic. I have laughed that hard in awhile. Epic trolling with great results!

  • Marie

    This is certainly funny but I find it tragic and true. I have never ready anything that exacts our feminist-centric culture so well. I’m going to share this with my friends. I am a life coach and I hear from men all the time about the amazing expectations that come from women. What happened to loving each other?

  • Andrew

    Lame

    Your “profile” was much longer and actually much worse. A woman saying she wants a guy in shape is not the same as you saying you only want to date a woman with 8% body fat – which, by the way, is a LETHAL bodyfat % on a woman if maintained for more than a day! SO you actually requested a DYING ANOREXIC. How is that comparable to seeking a healthy man?

    I also don’t think a woman saying she wants someone FAMILY oriented is superficial or arrogant at all. And so on and so on.

    Then you went on to use your ridiculous profile to be rude to women who weren’t necessarily wanna be “princesses”. You really don’t have a point.

    If you bothered to look at some male profiles you would realize the men are just as bad if not worse. They in fact have even worse and far more obnoxious criteria.

    Men like you usually get all pi**y because YOU can’t stand having any expectations put on you. Men like you always want a younger woman and get mad when they don’t want you. How dare they.

    Men like you also want a woman who help pay the bills yet want them to do ALL the child care, housework, and of course babysit you as well. Really you just want slavery system where you get to be the master. You are so pathetic.

    You are not a victim. You are a psycho who is bitter that your fantasy world doesn’t exist and women have no interest in making you a god at their expense.

    Get help.

  • silverharkness

    That was hilarious, Rollo. I’ve noticed your writing has become much more serious. Was this just a one off?

  • Aaron Miller

    This is why smart women are not on dating sites. Only a fool could read through all the ridiculous profiles authored by BOTH sexes and not realize that although there might be someone worth while in the mix that it isn’t worth the time to weed through them all. Life is hard for women now, they work, raise kids alone, and so on. Describing a woman as a cum dumpster? Wow. The demeaning and disparaging way that women are thought of and spoken about says who these men are. I suspect that the next generations of women will suffer greatly at the hands of men or opt out altogether and treat men as sperm donors and male fuck toys. The abused become either disassociated or the abusers. Whose mother is a cum dumpster? Whose sister? Your daughter gets to look forward to men out there who think of them as cum dumpsters???? Is it any wonder? The future for these types…divorce, children raised alone by that cum dumpster, children with decreased opportunity due to financial constraints. Just for starters. Men and women are on a terrible path of destruction due to stupidity, ignorance, selfishness, destructive behavior, and disregard for the value of human life at all. If I were a young woman today, I would freeze my eggs, concentrate on money, use men at my convenience, let them think they “got over”, and consider long and hard whether I would have children at all. I’d rather cry in the back OF MY OWN MERCEDES than endure a lifetime of this kind of jockeying for the simple chance to be treated like a human being worthy of loving and being loved. I think men feel displaced because more and more women are doing a version of what I have described. You don’t like the way women are shopping for men? Interesting, men have been doing this for a long, long time. Lousy men have fewer women if any that will accept them beyond serial monogamy. Women are the ones who file for divorce. Soon, they will just dispense with marriage altogether. That will be great news for you guys! You can avoid any responsibility at all with the full approval of women. At the end of your lives, your children will not be yours. You will become a tourist in your own life, and you will die not having proved to yourself whether you are worthy or not. Probably alone with a paid nurse. Buck up though, women have been enduring that since the beginning of recorded history sans the paid nurse!

  • sal ceech

    Sigh …. Hey bro or sis? I wish you and the previous commentator all the best chasing that hamster to put it back in the cage.

  • Rik

    Oh, Andrew. I can barely contain my laughter.

    I wish you luck in your future adventures as a cuckold servant.

  • Anonymous

    Solid article. Couldn’t agree more.

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