As I wrote in Controlling Interests, the secrecy previously necessary for hypergamy and women’s pluralistic sexual strategy is rapidly being replaced with not just a new, overt, social openness about it, but a flaunting, triumphalism about how men are expected to embrace this new openness about it.
These would be the boys / men who would be taught to “naturally” defer to the authority of women under the auspices of a desire to be an equal partner.
These are the men raised privately and created socially to be ready for women, “when it comes time to settle down, and find someone who wants an equal partner.”
These would be the men ready to expect and accept a woman’s proactive cuckoldry of him in the name of being a pro-feminine equal.
These are the men raised to accept an open form of hypergamy in place of the selling to an old-order Beta provisioning model.
As in this Red Robin commercial, it’s gotten to the point now that the Feminine Imperative is comfortable in ridiculing men for not already being aware of the Alpha Fucks / Beta Bucks dynamic of hypergamy, as well as ridiculing them for going along with it anyway.
The expectation that men should already know this dynamic and be ready to accept it, and commit himself to it, engenders genuine shock when a man deviates from that script. As we found with the story of the Spreadsheet Guy a couple weeks ago, the anger female commenters expressed over his logging his wife’s excuses for turning him down sexually was not due to his actions, but rather what those actions represented for the greater whole of men.
Women’s indignation over this was rooted in a Beta man not already being aware of the role he was expected to play. The new order fem-groupthink presumes that any guy who follows the old order socio-sexual contract should already know he’s been cast as a dutiful, providing Beta — he follows the prepared script for the guy who responsibly proves he’s a ‘better man’ for having forgiven her sexual indiscretions with prior Alpha’s and accepting the role of being relegated to being her emotional supporter and hand-holder. And all of this after she’s had her “self-discovery” and know who “she really is.”
Genies and Bottles
This expectation of men being preconditioned to follow a feminine-primary social order is not just limited to women’s expectations. We’ve progressed to the point that blue pill men are becoming vocal advocates for this same acceptance of open hypergamy.
Under the dubious pretense of concern for the general lack of gallant, chivalry and Beta Bucks-side provisioning women are entitled to – in spite of women’s embrace of open hypergamy – these watered down ‘purple pill’ “Dating Coaches” suffer from the same shock and indignation that a woman, somewhere, might not be given her life’s due of having a dutiful Beta awaiting to fulfill the provisioning side of her sexual strategy when her SMV begins to decay in earnest.
In a feminine centric social order, even men must be strong advocates for open hypergamy, and essentially their own proactive cuckoldry. That a woman may be better prepared than most Beta men to provide for her own security is never an afterthought – their sales pitch is the same old-order lie that women will reciprocate intimately for a man’s good nature and virtuous respect for the feminine if he’ll only accept open hypergamy.
But Spreadsheet Guy went off the reservation, “how dare he keep track of his wife’s sexual frequency!” The general anger is rooted in his ‘not getting‘ the social convention that sex (for consummate Beta providers) “tapers off after marriage”, but if he would just Man Up and fall back into his supportive, pre-established role, and learn to be a better, more attentive ‘man’ for his wife, she would (logically) reciprocate with more sex.
For what it’s worth, the men women want to fuck wouldn’t keep track of sexual frequency because the dread of missing out on a sexual opportunity with a desirable Alpha is usually enough to ensure frequency. Alpha Men wouldn’t complain about sexual frequency, they simply move on to a new woman. Beta’s complain about sexual frequency because they are expected to know and accept (now via open hypergamy) that they will never get the type of sex their women had with the Alphas before them, but are led to believe they would get (and better) if they commit to a woman’s provisioning.
Nobody marries their ‘best sex ever':
According to a recent study by iVillage, less than half of wedded women married the person who was the best sex of their lives (52 percent say that was an ex.) In fact, 66 percent would rather read a book, watch a movie or take a nap than sleep with a spouse.
Amanda Chatel, a 33-year-old writer from the East Village, says, “With the men I’ve loved, the sex has been good, sometimes great, but never ‘best.’ It’s resulted in many orgasms and was fun but, comparatively speaking, it didn’t have that intensity that comes with the ‘best’ sex.
“I knew [my best sex partner] was temporary, and so the great sex was the best because the sex was the relationship,” she adds. “We didn’t have to invest in anything else.”
As you can see here, the incremental problem that advocates of the ‘Man Up and accept your duty to open hypergamy’ meme will find is that reconciling the old-order social contract they need to balance hypergamy will become increasingly more difficult as example after example like this become more evident and more commonplace.
These ‘Dating Coaches’ are hocking advice from the perspective of an old-order social contract for men, in order to reconcile the well earned, well deserved consequences women are now suffering as a result of a new-order, feminine-primary social contract that has embraced unrestrained hypergamy.
Getting the Best of Her
Another link had been making the rounds in the manosphere a few weeks ago, and at the risk of just adding my own voice to the chorus I thought I’d dissect it a bit. You can have a read of the original “advice column” here, but I think the quotes will pretty much tell the story. Emphasis my own:
Dear Carolyn:
After multiple relationships not working out because both parties were dishonest in one way or another, I decided to use a new approach to my current relationship. I am 23, met my current boyfriend (also 23) online, and decided to be COMPLETELY HONEST.
This was meant to mostly cover my feelings, as I tended to hold things in unhealthily, but I let it fold over to all aspects, including the disclosure of my sexual history. I have now learned this was a mistake.
Not to make any Beta leaning guy even more depressed, but I read this and couldn’t help but see how the Sheryl Sandberg ‘open hypergamy’ model is only going to aggravate more and more unplugged / red pill aware Betas.
Think about how disenfranchised that dutiful Beta is going to be when he is flat out told to his face by a woman, he was conditioned to believe would appreciate his unique old order appeal, that he’ll never be getting the ‘sexual best’ he believed his wife would have waiting for him in marriage. It’s one thing to read article after article detailing the triumphant aspects of a new open hypergamy, and it’s one thing to see it blatantly used in commercial advertising, but it’s quite another to experience it firsthand, viscerally, in your face.
Besides the fact that she’s had multiple “relationships” at age 23, I find it interesting that she’s recognized this ‘openness’ as a mistake. Not a mistake with regards to her own choices, but rather a mistake in feeling comfortable enough to lay bear her sexual strategy for a guy who should expects should already be “accepting of who she is.”
Compare the open hypergamy model with the guy from Saving the Best:
I am so fucking lucky. I got married to a whore, that fucks like a prude.
In feminine-primary society men are constantly and publicly demonized as the ‘manipulator’. The default is to assume men are the one’s to watch out for. Men are the sex with the most dishonest nature with the most to gain sexually by playing games to trick women into believing they’re something they’re not in order to fuck them and leave them.
This presumptions is really a generalized social convention that builds a foundation for more specific social conventions women need in order to exercise feminine-primary control with men and culture on whole. It’s actually a rudimentary convention that’s easy to accept for women since feminine hypergamy has evolved a subconscious ‘vetting’ mechanism into most women’s psyches.
While it’s giggly and entertaining for women to categorize men into Cads and Dads, the irony of their doing so is that this only highlights women’s life-long patterns of deception and the manipulation efforts necessary to effecting their own dualistic sexual strategy.
That sexual selection ‘firmware’, the one which predisposes women on a limbic level to evaluating mating options of short term breeding opportunities (Alpha Fucks) with parental investment opportunities (Beta Bucks), is the same mechanism that made women the more deceptive sex when it comes to sexual strategies. The problem now is that this hypergamous deceptiveness is being replaced with ‘complete honesty’ from a macro-societal level down to an interpersonal one.
And ironically, it will be the most stubborn of blue pill Beta men, advocating for a return to an old-order social contract destroyed by the very women they hope will respond to it, who will be the last to finally accept and respond to the new-order of open hypergamy.
August 13th, 2014 at 5:15 pm
jacklabear
August 13th, 2014 at 5:11 pm
Her intelligence get overridden by her belief. Humans are like that. Generally.
August 13th, 2014 at 5:21 pm
Fight who? How?
Otherwise, yeah… along with food production, electricity generation, and bartering, all on smaller, more localized, fractal scales. Essentially, Black Swan robustness.
But the elites need to accept a few things:
corporations are not people,
money is not speech,
people are not property,
perpetual growth is unsustainable,
and the free exchange of ideas is not only unstoppable, it is the only thing that will save us all.
August 13th, 2014 at 5:48 pm
M Simon
August 13th, 2014 at 5:15 pm
jacklabear
August 13th, 2014 at 5:11 pm
“Her intelligence get overridden by her belief. Humans are like that. Generally.”
This is true.
Now, where did she get her belief from?
Is it possible that your basement dweller got his beliefs from the same place?
I appreciate your message here. As far as I’m concerned, the current mess needs to be addressed from as many directions as possible at the same time.
But consider that where your children are getting their beliefs from seems to be more influential than what even you can bring to bear.
Do you feel that your kids are doing the best they can given what they believe?
I have been trying to give my son some red pill education before he goes to college. Unfortunately, like me he has brain wiring high in conscientiousness and agreeableness which tends to make him see red pill writings as sociopathic. He felt the same about Ayn Rand.
OTOH, he shares my iconoclasm and critical thinking, so he might come around after getting some real life experience.
August 13th, 2014 at 6:57 pm
@jf12:
” . . . the hope that I can plausibly bell myself . . .”
Consider the possibility that your typo is more correct than what you intended.
August 13th, 2014 at 8:49 pm
D-Man
August 13th, 2014 at 5:21 pm
Of your list there are only two things I totally agree with:
people are not property,
and the free exchange of ideas is not only unstoppable, it is the only thing that will save us all.
==================================
If money is not speech they can silence YOU.
And to perpetual growth: we are quite far from the limits. It is not something you need worry about in your life time. And probably not for 1,000s of years.
Let us take something like the scarcity of gold. What does the finding of the first gold asteroid do to that idea?
Let us take the scarcity of energy. What does the discovery of working low cost fusion do to that? I know of 3 or 4 groups on the verge of that. Or even the interim production of thorium reactors? (China is actually in the process of doing that).
And how about Feynman’s “there is lots of room at the bottom” – nanotechnology.
And to say nothing can be done is just what they want you to believe. It keeps you depressed and doing nothing.
I have watched anti-Prohibition go from 12% to 54% in 40 years. Against the wishes of ALL the powers. Because 40 years ago some people set out to do it. I suppose it was a different time. We had alphas back then.
Some one steal your alpha? Or did you just give it to them?
August 13th, 2014 at 8:57 pm
jacklabear
August 13th, 2014 at 5:48 pm
But consider that where your children are getting their beliefs from seems to be more influential than what even you can bring to bear.
I am undaunted.
Let me repeat:
I have watched anti-Prohibition go from 12% to 54% in 40 years. Against the wishes of ALL the powers. Because 40 years ago some people set out to do it. I suppose it was a different time. We had alphas back then.
And what was required for me to get that result? A mountain of wreckage.
===
What the powers are doing will create a bigger mountain of wreckage. That will create its own corrective if I just leave some seeds.
August 13th, 2014 at 9:02 pm
You know who I feel sorriest for? The women.
You can see it starting even today. The 40 somethings who regret not having children. That cohort will grow.
A 40 something man can still have children. The odds are greatly against 40 something women.
They are setting themselves up for a life of misery.
August 13th, 2014 at 9:27 pm
M Simon
August 13th, 2014 at 8:57 pm
jacklabear
August 13th, 2014 at 5:48 pm
“I have watched anti-Prohibition go from 12% to 54% in 40 years. Against the wishes of ALL the powers. Because 40 years ago some people set out to do it. I suppose it was a different time. We had alphas back then.”
I assume you’re talking about cannabis.
Interesting you mention that. Is/was it not the blank slaters who popularized pot? The SJW PC crowd?
I never thought of the peace and love hippies as alphas, especially pot smokers. Except for the scam artist types who cynically took advantage of the situation.
Yes, the leftists have prevailed. I admire your optimism in believing that education rather than a collapse/reset will change the current social situation. But your observation above seems to contradict that.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:10 pm
I think that there is a paradox out there that is difficult for men to understand. Men hear advice saying “be yourself and relax”. “Stop caring so much!” “Don’t be attached!”
I think that the issue there is that men don’t realize to be good with women is that there is an element of indifference but you have to cares about what you want in your life and to not include in your life when it comes to women. Men need to have some standards for how they want their lives to be and what kind of behavior they want in a women. Most men don’t. They just want to settle for the first girl who shows interest in them. And many will get over excited for when a women shows interest in them.
An attractive man knows he has options and that he is in control with who he wants to have in his life. Because of that he doesn’t need to effort at keeping a women in his life. The only thing he needs to really attend to is his life and keeping up to his standards. He works hard at keeping his life where he wants it and climbing to new levels. When he’s doing that and knows what he wants in a women and acts on that he is doing his part. That is a man really showing up in this world.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:15 pm
Simon,
Too many of your thoughts are grounded in self-congratulation. How do you know childless forty-somethings are set up for a life of misery? I’ll tell you. It’s because YOU had kids therefore it was the right decision and anyone unlike you is flawed/mistaken. It’s the oldest trick in the book; judging others in a way that flatters yourself and/or helps you to feel better about your own decisions. Not very manly is it? To resort to some cheap, mean-girl sniping at other people’s lives to get your own self sorted out. A lot of people are electing to forego parenthood. It’s simply too expensive and stressful. Instead they want to have;
-far more personal freedom
-about 500k more of discretionary spending. A ten thousand dollar wardrobe is peanuts in this case and I can tell you that dressing like a man from the forties on a daily basis is a great life satisfaction.
-far more travel
-far better health (sleep, time to exercise etc.)
-far less worry
-far more time for hobbies, interests, growth
-Money, money, money. Simply enjoying the ritual of spending money for a pleasant product as opposed to every single payout causing you a twinge of pain/worry.
-freedom to leave a boring, unsatisfying relationship without wrecking the lives of your progeny
-YOUNG, FOREIGN WHORES (Sorry. I tried to get through this without mentioning that but I could not.)
Now just look at that list (not in the context of children vs. no-children) and tell me that is a recipe for misery.
To each their own.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:30 pm
jacklabear
August 13th, 2014 at 9:27 pm
Evidently you know nothing of the body’s endocannabinoid system.
Well I have studied it in depth. It cures cancer. And when it is not strong enough to cure cancer exocannabinoids can be used.
Do you have any idea what that one thing alone would save the economy?
I don’t give a sh*t about the hippies. People dying of cancer concern me.
And that is just one disease. Cannabinoids regulate EVERY system in the body.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:33 pm
M. Simon – “You know who I feel sorriest for? The women.”
Nah, they made their choices based on their inherent nature. We know from the RedPill they are by design hypergamous, deceptive, dishonest, rebellious, highly opportunitic, self centered, and incapable of loyalty. Apparently it’s beyond their control. They are reaping what they have sewn. Faulty impulse control is a bitch, but thankfully not my problem. They always have either one foot out the door, or at least one hand on the knob especially after after meeting the wall. They are simply not worthy of commitment after age 32 when the fertility window starts to close.
A life of chasing shiny objects and tingles turns out to have been a poor choice, SFW? Not my job to pick up the pieces. Maybe if that realization involved gratitude and contrition for whatever effort I might make I’d feel differently. I won’t hold my breath.
At least we now know you see women as idiots who can’t know any better. Otherwise you might realize their fates are largely of the same origin of the Betas you loathe. I guess I should take solace in your crediting the Betas with having agency.
I wanted to be Ward Cleaver. But Ward Cleaver isn’t exciting enough. I suffered from being a boy scout, I still do. At least I’ll die with a clean conscious. Now I know that being a good man is the path to failure I can actually choose or reject that. However, a society where the women exhault the bad men and spit in the faces of good is a society not worth saving. It can’t collapse fast enough.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:36 pm
melmoth
August 13th, 2014 at 10:15 pm
Compare:
Be strong! It worked for me. Here is how:
With:
If it wouldn’t bother you too much or take up too much of your time could you please be a little stronger? Pretty please.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:41 pm
Simon,
Just more self-congratulation on your part. You’re not even bothering to be coherent with it, you’re so drunk on yourself.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:46 pm
Badpainter
August 13th, 2014 at 10:33 pm
Thank you. You get my position.
Where we differ is that I think the wreckage provides opportunity for rebuilding on more solid ground. If the men assert themselves.
BTW at 17 I was Ward Cleaver. By 30 I was Blackbeard the Pirate. By 38 I had started a family with the duplicitous of my choice.
Women are what they are. It is the men who have changed.
Note: this guy:
http://www.singularity2050.com/2012/06/a-first-quarter-poll-on-the-misandry-bubble.html
Thinks the misandry bubble will burst by 2020.
August 13th, 2014 at 10:53 pm
Women are what they (plus 50 pounds each on average). Men have changed due to rampant female obesity. When a good, clean-cut, modest, athletic man making 200k a year is lampooned by a culture then things are not going well. There about 300 good men in the USA for every 9. 3 million for every 10.
August 13th, 2014 at 11:14 pm
M. Simon – “Thank you. You get my position.”
Sure. Now I hope you get mine. I refuse to have such creatures as you describe as actively involved in my life. A dog can be trained in less than a year and doesn’t require active ceaseless vigilance. And dogs are loyal. The training and vigilane never stops with women. Like Melmoth I enjoy my leisure too much to make every waking moment outside of work an uncompensated ow reward job. Ten years ago I could he been convinced otherwise.
I believe women can behave differently they simply choose not to. It’s their choice to chase want over need not mine. My empathy for them is genrally zero on issues like this. It might time for women to evolve. Again I won’t hold my breath.
August 13th, 2014 at 11:54 pm
Hey guys, you are missing out -> http://www.hookingupsmart.com/2014/08/08/politics-and-feminism/the-insidious-intractable-problem-of-street-harassment/#disqus_thread
I wonder how many of these abusers were PUA’S trying to get laid but were barred from the holy vagina because most Puas don’t have the looks which grant access to free sex?
August 13th, 2014 at 11:58 pm
Badpainter
August 13th, 2014 at 11:14 pm
Well. I WANTED a family. And constant vigilance has other uses. In fact I acquired constant vigilance before I got married. So keeping an eye on duplicitous didn’t cost me extra.
Constant vigilance has come in very handy in my engineering work. It reduces the number and severity of errors.
I got a woman from the “good old days” and character wise she seems no different from the women described here.
So there is where we disagree. I don’t think they can change. Why?
1. She wants the best juice she can get.
2. She wants the best provisioning she can get.
3. She wants a dominant male
I touched on that obliquely with #1 daughter today. She said she didn’t need male provisioning. She don’t know nothing about her own psychology. Even if a woman can provision she wants a man (if she wants one) who can out provision her. I have hinted that the equality she strives for will not make her happy. She is going to have to crash before she remembers.
I can’t believe how lucky I was that 1st GF taught me the rudiments of game. Very very few of them know themselves that well.
August 13th, 2014 at 11:58 pm
”Women are what they (plus 50 pounds each on average). Men have changed due to rampant female obesity. When a good, clean-cut, modest, athletic man making 200k a year is lampooned by a culture then things are not going well. There about 300 good men in the USA for every 9. 3 million for every 10.”
Aren’t like 70% of the male population obese? hard to have women feel attraction for the average man when the average man is a human version of Jabba The Hutt, right? Unless the man owns the football club Chelsa, i’m not seeing the average man get anywhere the woman who isn’t fat nor ugly, game will not save him from the friendzone, more likely the creep-zone. In Europe I see good-looking women with good-looking men, average(nothing special but not fat) people with average people and obese women with obese women.
If ya’ll stick to women who are your equals in looks, you won’t have a problem. Sure, you want to bang the 22 year old Angelina Jolie and you think coming up to her and spitting ”mad game” will see you get laid, but you don’t look like a 22 year old Brad Pitt and you aren’t a sociopath with good-looks + height like Roissy.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:09 am
The women in America far outpace the men in regards to obesity. Especially among 20 somethings. A lot of the fat men are simply eating along with their whale gf’s. When they split up, the men drop weight. I’ve seen it happen again and again. Women led the obesity/sugar charge and it has ruined the culture. Rotting it from the inside out. There is a lot of ‘blame the male’ around here. Starting to resemble Jezebel. Also, if you’re European then I’m not sure why you would swoop in with the explanation of American social dynamics.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:10 am
Professor Von Hardwiggs
August 13th, 2014 at 11:54 pm
I find that a constant source of amusement. Women do what they can to attract attention and then give you “the look” should you show the slightest interest. The message of course is that “I don’t want YOUR attention”. On to the next one.
I have no idea why men pursue where there is no interest. If they were actually PUAs they would know that wasting time on “no interest” is a waste of time.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:18 am
I certainly would welcome a positive swan event for humanity. Nano looks good, love Feynman. Wish he could have been here for the Higgs. That might lead to something.
But hey, aside from congratulating yourself, you wouldn’t be here if you weren’t at least a little bit interested in revolution.
Maybe your son’s just tired of hearing it and hides in the basement. Tell us more, this place is about improvement.
The sphere needs spunky ol cranks who won’t quit tellin us to buck up.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:18 am
Yeah, ‘insidious and intractable’ until they hit 50 and “feel invisible” to men…
http://www.match.com/magazine/article/11049/Over-50-And-Feeling-Invisible/
…which of course is also men’s fault.
Sorry Aunt Giggles your irrelevancy and dead branding of HUS is not the manosphere’s problem. Go phishing with your dontlink trolling and copy & paste HuffPo owned blog somewhere else, no one cares about you anymore.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:28 am
melmoth
August 14th, 2014 at 12:09 am
Funny. I asked the first mate how she rated me. She said “9” I said what about my nose. She was adamant. I rated her a 9. So maybe you are correct. In the end like attracts like. In terms of SMV.
I do know that when we were dating she had her choice among several men I would rate as 9s and dominant. So maybe she wasn’t BSing me.
I asked her once what made me the best choice for her among the 9s. (that wasn’t quite how I phrased it) “The odds of good provisioning. ”
Yeah. Women want just one thing. After they get everything else.
BTW I told her the first daughter rated 9.5. And then I told her she rated 9. She was quite pleased with that.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:29 am
”susanawalsh Mod Josie • 4 days ago
It’s a serious problem in our culture for several reasons.
Getting laid is not an achievement that contributes in any lasting way. It is the futile pursuit of hedonism.
Most men – like 90+% – are just not going to have more than a handful of sexual partners in their lifetimes. Many will have zero. That will not change no matter what advice is available.
Women reject very sexually experienced men for long-term mating.”
Straight from the horse’s mouth. She wants men to accept that most men are only going to be the beta bucks for women, and wants the men with little prospects to have a good job(no money, can’t be the beta bucks, no sex) to come to terms with their involuntary(remember that women are vigorously against legalized prostitution) and to remain as the bodyguard for women who sadly have to brave each day against the terrible barbarians who can’t resist their divine beauty!
Curiously how I’m surrounded by beautiful women and I’ve never in my entire life seen a man approach a woman, let alone sexually harass her, but a woman who is nearly 60 is accosted by a 20-something man who wants to shag, followed up by hundreds of posts from women who confessed to be nothing special but who ”were” sexually assaulted or made to feel sexually molested.
Honestly, I believe Mrs. Walsh is being ignored by her sucker-provider and she made-up that story to up her sexual market value, and she also gains cheerleader numero uno cookies by giving to her entourage the possibility to act like victims.
But I do think she’s right about one thing. There are millions upon millions of sexually frustrated young men who are capable of having sex with anything. Heck, my Country is a first world, Country, a herald of Europe and we’ve had cases of young, decent-looking men raping 70 year old women.
Alpha fucks and Beta bucks, this is the natural order of life, thing is, civilization was stable despite the lack of sex by the majority of men because average-looking men with modest income were sent to wars to die off, leaving women open to beta bucks and Alpha fucks, but the western world is so calm nowadays, most young men are stuck being bombarded everyday with sexual images(TV, video games, books) and being constantly near women who think the western world is a ”lets dress like skanks and act like skanks, but act offended when average johnny thinks you are interested for you’ve been rubbing yourself against him for the past 10 minutes.”
Dudes, a very large percentage of the male population in every Country is either going to be sent to a war in some dusty Paki village, or we are going to get our testicles chopped off.
In centuries past off the men who were tasked with protecting the King’s wives had their testes cut off. Read that thread, Miss Bee Queen Walsh, wants and expects men to risk their integrity to protect random women.
This is the age of women, the rise of the mother goddess matriarchy. Give up on the pussy or become like one of those white knights.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:35 am
D-Man
August 14th, 2014 at 12:18 am
Thanks!
Old Crank aka Simon
Yeah. I’m up for revolution. It is why I studied Polywell Fusion. Dr. Bussard (the inventor) gave me a personal thank you a couple of months before he died.
If that works out and can be turned into a rocket the solar system is ours. Mars in 2 to 4 weeks. Jupiter in 6 to 12.
We will have 1,000s of years of growth ahead if that works out.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:39 am
”. Starting to resemble Jezebel. Also, if you’re European then I’m not sure why you would swoop in with the explanation of American social dynamics.”
We have the same culture. We constitute the western world and there’s no difference between European women and American(well, apart from the looks).
”I find that a constant source of amusement. Women do what they can to attract attention and then give you “the look” should you show the slightest interest. The message of course is that “I don’t want YOUR attention”. On to the next one.
I have no idea why men pursue where there is no interest. If they were actually PUAs they would know that wasting time on “no interest” is a waste of time.”
Male attention is their most sought-after resource. They have no problem treating prostitutes either as if they are victims or abusers of men, yet my grandfather who was a sailor comments on how the hookers his friends went to dressed far more conservatively than most young women today from the western world. I don’t know, man, but a woman looks at me and expects me to fix a car because I look like a man, I sound like a man, so I must do what a man must do – I’m automatically a mechanic or a bodyguard or a shrink, depending on what she needs at the time, but you be damned if you think a woman whose shoes have more fabric than her shorts shorts is worthy of meeting your parents.
Hell, I wouldn’t even want to be seen with these women by strange men.
Anyway, it’s a very strange combination. Men are addicted to female beauty, women are addicted to male attention, whoever that male might be, and they’ll put themselves in very dangerous situations and then ask for protection.
Truthfully, I don’t believe most women ever get to be raped or molested at all. Female beauty is a drug that soothes and lobotomizes the majority of men and the rest of the women either look worse than my 80 year old grandmother or are not worth talking 5 minutes with due to their trashy/demanding personalities.
Most men treat women like Fort Knox treats its reserve of gold. oh the other hand, women treat men with poison and expect us to be around when they hit the wall and want to cash out. That or a jar needs opening and buffy the vampire slayer is too busy banging Spike. Dang, even that good girl preferred the bad boy over Angel.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:47 am
You guys know what I think about PUAS and the religion built surrounding vagina but I must confess this absolute certainty held by women that women themselves are the responsible party for defining what a man is pisses me off. My father defines what a man is. My grandfather also. Some posh, high-nosed nearly 60 year old woman who never worked a day in her life has no right in saying what men must do to be men, nor who is a man and who isn’t a man.
”Getting laid is not an achievement that contributes in any lasting way. It is the futile pursuit of hedonism.”
For real? This from the woman who slept with double-digits in quantity of jocks? What was she doing test-driving all those Alpha sausages, trying to build an emotional connection in order to have a partner to go to the library?
Getting laid is not an achievement for WOMEN. I’ve known guys who were good-looking and tall, but failed short of having the looks of models and these upstanding fellas had to sleep with obese women – No, they aren’t fat women.
And how many books, movies and songs do we have regarding young men having to fight and defeat metaphorical gods in order to win the girl = sex?
The futile pursuit of hedonism. Someone should tell her to stop watching the Gossip girls, the mean girls and whatever other TV show for 20-something girls and also to stop telling men they don’t have the right to be attracted to younger women only to turn around and say in one of her threads how a 17 year old youtube personality is not attractive and has no right in deciding what he finds attractive in women. I was pretty amazed how this 60 year old poundcake of make-up has the liberty to sexualize a 17 year old boy, but a 30 year old man can’t look at a 18 year old woman without being treated like the village’s creep. Ok, if it’s george clooney or the guy is rich, there’s no problem.
August 14th, 2014 at 12:54 am
I’m kinda coming off as angry. I am, a little bit. As I was reading that inane tirade of how western women – the most protected and desired women in the entire world – are somehow in a worse spot than Middle-eastern women, I remembered how the girls in my college would see me everyday, with my fellow female classmates and male classmates but they wouldn’t enter the elevator with me if it was only I and them, but they had no problem asking me to carry some heavy crap despite not even knowing my name.
So, be decent to women, they think you are hitting on them = sexually attacking them. Don’t pay attention to them = you are a sexual predator. Turn your back to society = But you are a man and we need you!
It’s a shame, really. The western civilization is the lighthouse of planet Earth. South America is the land of the druglords, Africa is the breeding grounds for endless viruses and territorial wars, and China and Russia are so alien to us, they are a completely different race. Gonna be a lot of fun when more than enough men give the middle-finger to this feminized obama/merkel and say, auf wiederhesen, suckers.
August 14th, 2014 at 1:04 am
Professor Von Hardwiggs
August 14th, 2014 at 12:29 am
At birth in the US the ratio is 1.05M to 1.00F. And the ratio does not improve much by age 20.
Thing is, death in childbirth made females more valuable. And thus we had a different culture.
So what is going on here? Shouldn’t the M/F ratio make women the more valuable sex? Not enough high value men. So we get slut culture. Actually it is probably more like –> #M*MSMV is less than #F*FSMV. and it is actually an integral over the curve. But the above shows the essence without the higher math.
BTW Islam sends their excess men out as conquerors. “With your shield or on it.” And the purpose for those men is to get a woman. If you look at the way they fight a lot of it is for show (not very good individual tactics). They want to look good for the girls. I saw pictures a few years back of a Pali guy “showing off” in a fight against some Israelis. He wound up holding his ground.
Women today act like they have “no value” and it shows. What that tells you is that male value has declined. There is a great mismatch. This is especially prevalent in colleges where the number can run as high as 1.0M to 1.5F But generally we have men in excess. Given the wider standard deviation in male abilities things should match. But they don’t.
August 14th, 2014 at 1:14 am
””It’s a serious problem in our culture for several reasons.” ”
”Women reject very sexually experienced men for long-term mating.”
This woman seriously has no awareness of what she says. She must be suffering from early onset of alzheimers because she claims one thing in one of her threads, a couple days later she’s contradicting herself, and she’s putting for everyone to see, the nature of women and their dual sexual strategy.
Yes, women don’t usually marry who are popular with women. Why? Cristiano Ronaldo has the looks and the money to switch top models every week. No woman can switch from Orlando Bloom and Brad Pitt and that Thor fella in a week. First because no woman is that hot, second because she’d be branded a slut.
Women marry average-men, decent men. Men who’ve been feminized and made to wait for that overwhelming opportunity to marry a saggy-bottomed, debt-ridden 35 year old woman. Damn, my grandfather worked his entire life, supported a family, but at least he married a 19 year old virgin hottie, cant’ say the same about the vast majority of the men who are my age and younger.
I feel so special, its like being a farm boy in the middle of nowhere and being called by your crap govt. to fight in world war II, to lose your life or your arms. Can’t wait!
”susanawalsh Mod James • 3 days ago
Good point about productivity going up when people are satisfied in their personal/love/sex lives.
That’s a depressing thought. Not that I or many other men necessarily want dozens of partners, but that we have so few options.
How many would you say you need? The median number for American men now is 1. In millennia past, most men never got a chance to reproduce.
If most men want an LTR anyway, which I agree with, then why the focus on casual sex conquests?”
First men gotta shut up and plow that field, women gotta have more free time to eat some chocolate sitting in front of the TV watching Oprah or Obama. Seriously? I think this modernized version of the overpowered Medieval Church(mrs walsh) is retarded. She claims to have 5k men visiting her blog everyday and she’s here telling these young men to stfu and become engineers(good wages, a lot of time out of the house, they can sneak in the Mexican gardener) or to become a doctor, to improve women’s lives, but have a man point out that if you don’t starve a dog he’ll be more obedient and work better, she throws out this excuse of, ”aren’t you lucky? You get one woman each. That’s more than most men in history ever received, most men didn’t get laid.”
”If most men want an LTR anyway, which I agree with, then why the focus on casual sex conquests?”
Because no man wants to be the partner in a relationship with the lesser numbers. That is a loss of personal power and a constant reminder to her of what her husband is, a low value man. I have never seen a woman complain of her bf having had too many women but women abhor men without sexual experience.
I truthfully pitty Mr. Walsh. He married her when she was 25, after having more than a handful of jocks and he’s stuck living with her, knowing how much alimony he’d have to pay to get rid of her, not considering how much money he’s spent throughout the decades on her and on her kids(children belong to women).
August 14th, 2014 at 1:24 am
Yes, I once was watching a show, American but shot in Israel. A group of young Israeli girls were sexually teasing a group of American soldiers(I believe) and when the guys made a move these ”good girls” called on their bad boys friends and these guys physically assaulted the soldiers.
Women have value and don’t have any value at the same time. There are far more women in China than there are men and dozens of millions of Chinese men are going to die as virgins, so women have the upper-hand and are extremely hypergamous. The dude must be 6 feet tall, has to have a house worth 100k, must earn x per month, must take her to visit her relatives in whatever it is, and the women are nothing, nothing that would make a thousand ships set sail for.
A few months ago some Chinese guy in his 30s killed himself to stop his girlfriend from nagging him.
I can understand that. Thousands of years ago only the strongest/most capable of adapting survived and go the pick of the litter, they could select the most attractive women for mating and they would keep the rest for entertainment, like Ramses II, who sired more than a 100 kids with 50 or more different women. Women do have a reason for creaming themselves over a über Apex Alpha male but there are very few attractive/rich men, how the heck are Apex Alpha males supposed to be created when masculinity is shunned and boys can’t even punch each other without being hit with a taser.
Tho, a lot of the more masculine and conquer-hungry men were homosexuals and didn’t bother with Women. Alexander The Great and many of the best Roman Emperors either didn’t care about women or were gay.
August 14th, 2014 at 10:08 am
@D-Man, good point, and here’s my two cents….
I live in a major urban center in the the Northeast, and my neighborhood is literally crawling with hipsters; I practically have to kick them out of the way to my favorite bar…
I’ve noticed a shift or evolution from the de-sexualized, fey and wispy hipster of 2008 to the Victorian sideshow strongman; I’m talking specifically about waxed mustaches, Pine Bros. beards a foot long, striped bathing costume shirts and the odd cravat and suspenders combo. (Yes, a cravat. In summer.) Odd thing though; the same guys who 6 years ago who dressed like Zooey Deschanel are the same guys wearing the 1890’s frontier blacksmith look, without any change in their physicality whatsoever.
If hipsterism is a form of nostalgia for a past you haven’t experienced personally, I think the 1890s look is a longing for a time when men were truly men; not just guys, but men that built cities, broke horses, hacked their way through the darkest Amazonian forest and harpooned whales on a Arctic expedition. However, I’m observing that 99% of these guys are rail-thin and couldn’t pick up a case of PBR without injuring their back.
Conclusion; the Victorian strongman look is a form of peacocking, suggesting a life of hardcore male achievement where there really isn’t any, that ultimately is used to attract the corollary hipster woman (a more lukewarm, bored creature I’ve yet to meet). And to illustrate one of Rollo’s principles, isn’t it far better to actually invest the time, energy, struggle and success to become that strongman, than to wax your mustache and pretend to be one?
Silly kids.
August 14th, 2014 at 10:15 am
@kfg re:bell.
I am not the stealthiest cat.
August 14th, 2014 at 10:17 am
re: peacocking.
There no reason not to do both; there’s no reason to ever *wait*. Paint your plumage brightly while you grow bigger tail feathers.
August 14th, 2014 at 1:13 pm
Some additional thoughts on the not-so-subtle messaging of the advertisement. Not only does it reflect the brazen entitlement to use men; to trade-up according to her desires, etc. but it is also important to note that the female protagonist is not some fit and tan model, but rather an everywoman: pear-shaped, frumpy, poorly dressed, short-haired, and “in charge” of the situation.
Both the chump who gets traded and the new chump are much better looking and it can be assumed that if they made the cut to a real life “date” they also had enough of the the requisite 29-point checklist satisfied. IOW, a much higher SMV than her.
So not only do we have yet another SIW extracting what she wants from the male commodity, her obvious entitlement to trade-up/out/openly, and framing her as the “prize”, but all of this is done with a female image that is within reach for many “average” women.
The hypergamy in-the-open is certainly the main issue of note, but embodying this messaging in a fat bob-cut in nana’s housedress is no accident either. It works to propagate the notion that female SMV is self-determined, that the pedestal is firmly beneath them merely because they are female, that the commoditization of men is not just for the hawt girls.
I see this reflected IRL with women I know who are just not particularly attractive or fun or interesting, yet still get dates, and treat those dates as an extractive exercise in pursuit of their “equal”. The disdain for those men often sprouting before the actual encounter. Hence the double dipping on a saturday night and other such tactics of greatly overplaying their hands.
Hypergamy is what it is, but the out-in-the-open messaging seems to also be aggressively targeting a free-falling female SMV bar, pressing the potential for assortive matching further and further out of reach.
In days past, at least the female “prize” exercising her hypergamous entitlement to male resources and attention reflected the apex of feminine form, some measure of reality vis a vis her SMV according to male standards. Now this power – or rather the illusion of SMV power is being peddled further and further away from those physical (and social) ideals.
August 14th, 2014 at 1:31 pm
Oh, and this:
“I knew [my best sex partner] was temporary, and so the great sex was the best because the sex was the relationship,”
The Sandberg AF/BB advice quite openly squares the “prize” as sex. Changing lanes is thus embedded with the let-down of transitioning from sex-as-the-relationsip to sex-as-part-of-the-relationship. As this becomes
“normal”, I find it increasingly difficult to justify upholding a relationship as the “prize”.
It is better to be the ex f*ckbuddy who blew her mind (and is still in her phone) than the guy who gets to navigate the transitional waters full of mines – like sex that can’t possibly measure-up to those AF “experiences” as she adopts the lane-changing relationship model as her strategy.
What women fail to understand about the risk of ghost cocks is that it needn’t be about the specifics of the individual men involved – though it is often indeed the case, but within the context of drag on the potential relationship it also has to do with the context, the circumstances that just can’t be replicated within the beta-bux or other monogamous relationship. It is set up to fail.
The indulgent, impulsive, transitory, risky, fleeting, visceral physical encounters – most often with built in expirations or other structural impediments (even self-destructs) are impossible to compete with given the confines of a relationship involving more than “just” sex. Indeed “boyfriends/husbands are boring”. The BetaBux man is just not going to give her the best no matter how well he plans that romantic B&B getaway.
August 14th, 2014 at 1:38 pm
Their power is NOT an illusion, we’ve had plenty of discussion about thirsty dudes that will pursue literally any skank.
And it’s sad but it’s also true, I’ve witnessed many of those guys in action, trying to get into the tents (I can’t call these clothings pants) of landwhales. It’s sickening, but it’s pure economics. The supply of pussy doesn’t seem to match the demand or else this wouldn’t happen.
Plus, some of these guys are even more attractive than me.
Gotta have some dignity…
August 14th, 2014 at 3:09 pm
@jf12:
Just be careful out there.
August 14th, 2014 at 4:22 pm
M Simon
August 13th, 2014 at 10:30 pm
jacklabear
August 13th, 2014 at 9:27 pm
“Evidently you know nothing of the body’s endocannabinoid system.”
Actually I do know some things about it. URB597 can be found on the market as a ‘research chemical’. There are other known FAAH and MAGL inhibitors and endocannabinoid reuptake inhibitors such as arachidonyl serotonin, VDM-11, AM-404 etc. The analgesic activity of acetaminophen is due to AM-404 being a metabolite.
“Cannabinoids regulate EVERY system in the body.”
Sure, so do opioids, and most neurotransmitters. Immune cells have receptors for serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine.
But I would like to discus something else you touched on.
Some believe alpha means large, loud and aggressive. Men like that tend to be not too bright and have poor impulse control. That is a weakness. Jiu Jitsu exploits that and their momentum. Homo Sapiens extincted the larger and stronger Neanderthals. There is a reason why women have historically preferred to mate with intelligent men. Intelligence is the most successful enhancer of survival and reproduction that nature has come up with yet.
There is a functional definition of alpha: a man that women are sexually attracted to. How about extending that? In a conflict, the man that prevails in the long run is the alpha, the loser is the beta.
Is that what you were getting at about the people 40 years ago who increased anti-prohibition from 12% to 54%?
August 14th, 2014 at 4:51 pm
Some men claim that men are made to serve women. The bible states that woman was made for man and to be his helper. Genesis 2:18; 1 Corinthians 11:9
Some men claim that intergender problems are men’s fault and that men are the ones responsible for fixing things. The bible states that a woman can build or destroy her home. Proverbs 14:1
One of these sources has more truth than the other
August 14th, 2014 at 7:32 pm
jacklabear
August 14th, 2014 at 4:22 pm
In a conflict, the man that prevails in the long run is the alpha, the loser is the beta.
Is that what you were getting at about the people 40 years ago who increased anti-prohibition from 12% to 54%?
Yes.
And if men determine to prevail they will. But it may take a while. Anyway I’m not into giving up. I’m my own patron saint when it comes to lost causes.
=========================
BTW contact me if you have a mind to. My e-mail is on the sidebar at:
http://powerandcontrol.blogspot.com/
It looks like I could learn more that a few things from you.
August 15th, 2014 at 12:59 am
@jacklabear re: “There is a reason why women have historically preferred to mate with intelligent men.”
There OUGHT to be a reason, but almost always women choose unreasonably. There is no evidence that women have ever chosen men to have more children with based on the man’s intelligence per se.
August 15th, 2014 at 3:02 am
Sure there is evidence. How else do you account for the existence of intelligent men? It is heritable. IQ scores have been going up since measurements have been taken.
Intelligence is only one factor among many that a particular woman may find attractive. Suppose all else being equal, would on average intelligence correlate with attraction? I don’t know how well the experiment could be done.
There are evolutionary psycologists who believe that one set of men’s courtship behaviors is about entertaining women, and this is whey things like serenading developed. Being good at creative performance requires high brain performance.
Coming back to the begining, a lot of men commenting on this blog seem quite intelligent and creative. Many have also had much success with women. Do they have children?
August 15th, 2014 at 3:56 am
jacklabear
August 15th, 2014 at 3:02 am
I can give anecdotal evidence. The first mate was making her final selection one week (I didn’t know it at the time).
Three men of similar body type and SMV. All attractive to other ladies. (reasonably high Ns). She chose me for two (related) reasons (I found all this out later). Earning potential and intelligence.
The breeding was true.
#1 son – artist (bright)
#2 son – graduated with honors UChicago – languages
#3 son – EE graduate
#1 daughter – graduated in the upper part of her class in ChemE
So yeah. It may not have been the first factor – it was the deciding factor.
BTW the other two guys were friends of mine.
August 15th, 2014 at 3:59 am
jacklabear
August 15th, 2014 at 3:02 am
Musical ability correlates with computer programming ability in the modern age. It is one of the questions I ask when hiring. “Do you play a musical instrument?”
August 15th, 2014 at 9:55 pm
“Do you play a musical instrument?”
Several reasonably well. I can get by passibly on everything but double reeds, but if your offer is sufficient I’ll pick up bagpipes and an oboe. I’ve always wanted to be a gentleman; a man who knows how to play the bagpipes – but doesn’t.
August 16th, 2014 at 3:37 am
Considering the quality of women in general these days and the effort that goes into them to keep them….
—
MGTOW does not (have to) mean celibacy or (or almost no) sex. A man going his own way has options and can regulate sex accordingly – this is true freedom and empowerment if he manages this approach well.
MGTQH – Men Going To Quality Hookers
MGTHQ – Men Going to Hooker Quality (all women are hookers nowadays, but going to the [quality] “professionals” is much less expensive [in the long run] and [much] less risky – less chance of entrapment through pregnancy – less chance of serving a jail term due to being falsely accused of domestic violence – more honest because it is a simple business transaction – if you choose your professionals well).
MLTLF – Men Living Their Lives Freely
MT4GM – Men Taking Their Time To Get married
MGMVL – Men Getting Married Very Late
MKIS – Men Keeping It Simple
MRTBE – Men Refusing To Be Enslaved
MGTTP – Men Going The Professionals
MIQH – Men Identifying Quality Hookers
MPTP – Men Preferring The Professionals
—
MGHQ – Men Getting Hooker Quality
MGQH – Men getting Quality Hooker
You get the idea.
August 16th, 2014 at 3:47 am
PS: Who knows, if very many men start going this way the general quality of women may even increase over time because they would have to set themselves apart from “common hookers”, which they certainly aren’t trying to do right now. The quality of hookers in general would increase too – “unprofessional hoes” (the average modern woman) vs. professional prostitutes.
August 16th, 2014 at 6:22 am
MPTOL – Men Prioritising Their Own Lives
MRTBE – Men Refusing To Be Entrapped
MPTBB – Men Protecting Their Bank Balances
MEBRI – Men Empowered By Rational Intelligence
Men Going Their Own Way
August 16th, 2014 at 6:27 am
MGPI – Men Getting Poon Internationally
MEATO – Men Exploring All Their Options
M3T2C – Men Taking Their Time To Commit
MGFSA – Men Going For Sovereign Autonomy
Men Going Their Own Way
(Yes, I’m in a different time zone – it’s mid-day over here).
August 16th, 2014 at 7:17 am
MRTBM – Men Refusing To Be Manipulated
MSTOH – Men Securing Their Own Homes
MBWBB – Men Being Wise Beyond Belief
Men Going Their Own Way
August 17th, 2014 at 10:12 pm
Followed the tweet about MMSL changing it’s tune. In the comment section, Lorri wrote about not understanding hypergamy.
“I also don’t get the concept of hypergamy that is spoken of endlessly in the manosphere. There is a certain level of accomplishment I look for in a male partner. Once found, I don’t keep looking for something better. And NO amount of accomplishment trumps the guy’s personality or intelligence.”
Except for when the personality and intelligence comes in under that minimum accomplishment level. Then it’s trumps it very easily.
August 20th, 2014 at 4:37 pm
@ Elle Bee
You are overlooking something.
Even if you were 100% correct, I cannot chose security, because even if you fell hard for me because of my awesome security providing skills, the biggest threat for my families security would be YOU.
I could promise you security, but with laws being what they are, it is not possible for you to promise me the same in any believable way shape or form.
Sure, I could totally alpha you into submission 24/7 as M Simon suggests (doubt it), but with pretty much the same amount of work I can bone 20 somethings that want to be all independent and empowered and I have no sword hanging over my head.
August 20th, 2014 at 10:07 pm
as M Simon suggests (doubt it)
There are outliers and out and out liars. Take yer pick. Makes me no mind.
I never felt a sword hanging over me.
Ya see. It is like I explained. I made a decision to get married. And I made that decision because the lady in question was 8 1/2 months pregnant. My decision as well. I wanted a family. If I had not wanted that I would still be spinning plates. It is easier. But I was never a big fan of easy for its own sake. I LIKE challenges. Not a common taste I grant you.
August 21st, 2014 at 8:38 am
M. Simon
Is there something you’re not telling us? Go on, get it off your chest
The following comes to mind for some reason
“In a demotic age, however, their justification for personal license could not long be confined to socially superior types such as themselves. Before very long, what was permissible for the elite became mandatory for hoi polloi; and when the predictable social disaster occurred, in the form of a growing underclass devoid of moral bearings, the elite that had absorbed (indeed, reveled in) Bloomsbury’s influence took the growth of the underclass as evidence that their original grudge against society and its conventions had been justified all along. The [anti]philosophy brought about the disaster, and the disaster justified the [anti]philosophy.”
August 21st, 2014 at 2:59 pm
Rollo, I have a long and relevant story to tell.. I’m going to try to keep it as short as possible..
After reading nearly all of the posts on this site, I want to make a suggestion to young men who want to combat the effects of the red pill, open hypergamy paradigm in which we live today. See the end of my post here if interested.
My story in summary, I’m slightly younger than you, and currently going through being dumped by my wife of 20 years, and mother of my three children. Sux, yes. This is due to various reasons, and hypergamy is one of them. I won’t elaborate on the other, relationship-based reasons (which are definitely real and relevant), because this is the summary version. This site has helped me, and I thank you very much for your work. I will add that much of this red pill awareness was instinctive to me throughout my life (or necessarily deduced because of my disposition), and my own (admittedly superficial) sexual nature led me to realize many of the realities of the red pill, while not understanding just how far the rabbit hole can go. I also was raised in a perfectly patriarchal, intact family.
My wife is an HB9, and easily more physically attractive than 90% of girls 10 years her junior. She’s got issues, yes, but she is also a good-hearted woman. She was loyal and faithful to me during our marriage, although mate guarding was definitely a part of that equation (instinctively). I’m not a natural Alpha by any means, but I do have a lot to work with. We were married and had our first child at ages 20 (her) and 23 (me). As she developed into this beautiful mature woman, we openly discussed some of the realities of the SMP, and took many steps to ensure we would *both* be shielded and protected from temptation, as well as opportunity. Very much a realist relationship. We proactively abstained from ‘putting ourselves in that position’. While our sexual relationship had ups and down (kids, nuff said), and many of the symptoms of the naturally differing sexual strategies of the male/female, for us, chemistry was never a problem. More accurately, we actually attempted to solve most of our relationship woes in the bedroom, which was at times detrimental (avoidance), and other times quite successful. I’m sure you can point me to a million explanations of how delusional I am, but seriously, sex was not a problem in our relationship, other than nitpicky shit, and of course, the inevitable doldrums of long term monogamy. The girl rarely held out on me, and once I learned to monitor her cycle, it was simple management.
Let me make this very clear. My wife was not a virgin at 20. But she was definitely never a carousel rider. She had a few boyfriends before me. Yes I can hear you all.. “Naive fool!”. No really. She was actually very inexperienced sexually, which I loved about her of course.
But one thing that has helped me cope during this tumult, is realizing that the problems I face right now, are really nowhere near as difficult as those experienced by others at different phases of their lives, throughout the pages of this site, and the overall problems of the current SMP, especially for young men who can’t see a realistic path to a traditional successful family.
My problems:
My heart is broken (yes, I was intentionally blue pill, with many innate and learned red pill tools in my arsenal). And I love my wife.
My wife is going to play the field now. And she will have no trouble, regardless of her age. She will get whatever she wants, and I’m faced with a very different outlook for my own prospects. But again, I will overcome, and I know I do have decent SMV (in the 40s SMP, which is of course a little irrelevant). But anyway I’m not worried about whether I can get laid. I just happen to think my wife is a few steps above me, and that sucks.
But look, men, I had it very good for a long, long time. My family is successful. My children are awesome people. I respect my wife even now, and she does respect me. We are totally amicable at this point. I have had to Man Up for sure, but BFD.
My marriage, while rocky, and dysfunctional, *at least* was blanketed by regular, hot sex with a gorgeous woman. Who am I to complain?
My wife may or may not go ride the carousel now, but she did not do that before me, nor during our relationship. Who am I to complain?
My wife did not cheat on me, she left me, amicably, and respectfully. Who am I to complain?
——————
Which brings me to my suggestion, which I’m sure Rollo and others will make much hay with.
Young Guys, if you want a woman who is
a) Physically attractive
b) Sexually willing
c) Wife quality
d) Committed and loyal to your sorry Beta ass for the long term
e) Old-world, to some degree
f) Trustworthy, and trusting
Then, when you have a date with a young female, coupled with some order of lovey-dovey feelings by both of you (i.e. more dates), good sex that reveals her inexperience, and a nagging little feeling of ONEitis..
..Fucking marry her, have kids immediately (nothing endears a woman to you like having your babies), get ready to mate guard the shit out of her, and do a lot of other work to make that relationship work, cuz that’s what it takes, with a hot chick. But importantly, a pre-carousel chick, because I can’t imaging having made it this long otherwise.
You can settle for that scenario, or you can settle for all the other realities that the manosphere has so kindly enlightened us to. Or, go marry a fat chick for love. Or, just sit on your hands and let the world pass you by. I mean, it’s your choice.
I chose to be stupid (by others’ estimations), throw caution to the wind, sink or swim, make it work, take the plunge, go for broke.
Irony? That I’m sitting here suggesting this, while I hold my broken heart in my hands 20 years later? Not at all, fellas. We have no regrets, and we have much to show for our efforts. As I said, there are many valid reasons it is over between us (not truly over, cuz we’re still raising one of three).
Quit being so cautious, dudes! Stop focusing on the girls who are already lost. This new world can be conquered. Denying women their chivalry aint gonna get it done either. But a little good old fashioned sense just might.
Furthermore, I will say this with great conviction.. I gamed my wife, again because I understood this, intuitively. But I had many cracks in my armor. Had I been more disciplined, educated, and refined, I would not be in this position today. I made big mistakes. YOU don’t have to. YOU are already fully enlightened.
p.s. I’ll gladly take any advice anyone has to offer in dealing with my dilemma. It is definitely tough.
August 21st, 2014 at 3:49 pm
Kiljoy
August 21st, 2014 at 8:38 am
M. Simon
Is there something you’re not telling us? Go on, get it off your chest
Once I got married and started raising children I stopped spinning plates. Not out of any moral conviction – I just didn’t have the energy or inclination. Plus it is bad for children to see their parent(s) so engaged.
The trouble with our age is that making families is no longer in vogue.
My Dad was a plate spinner before he married. He used to brag about his N to me without naming an actual number.
Of course staying married is a trick. Unless you are totally at home with dominance it will end in disaster. And I suppose the risk of disaster is always there no matter what. But men used to be risk takers.
August 21st, 2014 at 3:58 pm
TuffLuv
August 21st, 2014 at 2:59 pm
Quit being so cautious, dudes!
Well I made my last comment before reading yours. And I must say that any residual blue pill can poison things. But on risk we are in accord.
August 21st, 2014 at 4:45 pm
And I must say that any residual blue pill can poison things.
Well, if the manosphere is telling us we shall not dare to ever love a woman, that’s too bad.
Truth is, I love her with all her faults, red pill or not. To have lived our married life without at least some naivete that she truly loved me back would have been pretty pointless for my soul, don’t you think?
I think all these acute observations Rollo makes are very accurate, but I also think in an LTR, these tendencies can wax and wane on a very broad cycle. Things that have gone down since beginning our divorce have convinced me that there are deep seated feelings on both sides, primal instincts notwithstanding. I think it would be a mistake to advise men to have a complete distrust of their wives. Awareness is enough.
August 21st, 2014 at 5:02 pm
TuffLuv
August 21st, 2014 at 4:45 pm
Loving her and keeping the relationship intact are in the main two different questions. If you do love her you have to put blue pill aside – totally. Doesn’t mean you can’t be nice. But you MUST maintain dominance. Any chink in the armor not corrected will be poison. Slow or fast. You must make her submit. And keep her that way (with all the multiple meanings you can derive from those 5 words).
August 21st, 2014 at 5:21 pm
@TuffLuv, (re)start yourself here:
http://therationalmale.com/category/love/
The single most valuable lesson I’ve learned about love is Iron Rule of Tomassi #6;
Women are utterly incapable of loving a man in the way that a man expects to be loved.
http://therationalmale.com/2011/12/27/women-in-love/
Once I internalized this truth, and abandoned the very equalist idealism that women hold the same concept of love men do, my relationships with women improved dramatically.
Once I realized that a constant striving to fit a female concept of love into a male frame only makes a man weak, everything fell into place.
August 21st, 2014 at 5:34 pm
Thank you. I shall endeavor.
August 23rd, 2014 at 1:26 pm
[…] a competitive species in the face of limited resources. Women’s primary mating strategy is to mate with genetically rich alpha males capable of providing resources. Its arguable whether they are ever really happy when settling down […]
August 24th, 2014 at 11:57 pm
[…] and No-Fault Divorce (they found out extremely quickly that you don’t want to let women’s Hypergamous nature […]
September 1st, 2014 at 11:33 pm
[…] Open Hypergamy I made a case for the aspect of an ‘old order’ of Beta Provisioning being a previously […]
September 10th, 2014 at 12:18 am
[…] Open Hypergamy […]
October 5th, 2014 at 5:41 pm
[…] and philosophies used by men to wedge in their preferred mating strategy in the face of now open rampant hypergamy in Western societies. Beta Game is not viable for the youngest generation of young men. Its even […]
October 5th, 2014 at 11:11 pm
[…] [2] As quoted in Heloise to Abelard, Letter 2.11, from Latin trans. Luscombe & Radice (2013) p. 135. Heloise took this quote from Cicero, De inventione, i.31, 51-2. The context in Cicero includes some sex differentiation. Aspasia had the wife of Xenophon express her desire for better gold and more valuable dresses and ornaments for women. Aspasia had Xenophon express his desire for a better horse and a better farm. On Aspasia, see Plutarch, Lives, Pericles 24, 32. Pericles, enamored of Aspasia, reportedly waged war against the Samians at Aspasia’s behest. Hypergamy has attracted considerable reasoned analysis in today’s New Renaissance. […]
October 9th, 2014 at 1:39 am
[…] you understand the basics of feminine hypergamy and the sexual strategies women use to optimize their mate selection, and then changed your […]
October 19th, 2014 at 6:36 pm
[…] shaming men into compliance with it. Increasingly men are becoming aware of the raw duplicity of open hypergamy and are becoming less and less cooperative with what really amounts to their participation in their […]
October 20th, 2014 at 11:30 pm
i feel this is simply a degradation or “progression” for some….men having to accept everything women wanted and they have. does anybody remember or is anyone old enough to remember that it was taboo to have sex before marriage? then it degraded from there and it became ok to have sex w/ your fiancee, after all youre gonna get married right?…then it degraded even more from there and it became ok to sleep w/ any boyfriend since you were so “in loooove” and what not….and now here we are in total slutville…why wouldnt women flaunt open hypergamy when there are so many men who just take it and defend women, even on the man-o-sphere, there are so many slut-apologists who wont hesitate to defend women for being “empowered” or even say a man is insecure for even caring about her past and theyre so desperate that they accept nearly any kind of woman….in 15 years most girls will have been in 3-somes, sex-tapes galore…but the young boys growing up w/ them will simply accept them as ok and not only that, they will glorify them since theyre so desensitized to a virtuous woman! in fact a virgin nowadays is even ridiculed? ridiculous….now bad is good and good is bad (Isaiah in the bible)…i feel that men who dont want or demand a virgin just have low-self-esteem, low self-worth (i wonder why), total desperation, no manhood…its incredibly sad. meanwhile the women turn more disgustingly slutty and brazen and most men WILL accept this sadly!
when will it end? when men can say no and demand a virgin wife like men in the past used to….even when men accepted and married a woman w/ even ONE man in her past because it was “in a relationship”…that was too much…what men dont realize is that women always want more…and more! in fact since when is a “girlfriend” equivalent to a wife? only for the past 20 years it seems….it seems as if men perhaps want to elevate a woman’s status…to respect her as he would his wife because deep down…he and they both know its wrong to have sex before marriage and so they elevate the girlfriend or relationship as if it was truly a marriage. this is a modern invention. perhaps if u were a concubine but everywhere else in civilization a wife was honored and only if u got married were u an honest woman, period, if not u were mostly considered a whore. legitimizing “relationships” as if they were akin to marriage was the first big blow…..men thought they could have their cake and eat it too…they thought they could have sex w/out marriage and have women stay relatively chaste…no women always want more…women are never satisfied…this is men need to lay down the law because women’s emotions always get the best of them, always….
October 21st, 2014 at 2:25 am
laissezblu
October 20th, 2014 at 11:30 pm
The good old days aren’t coming back as long as resources are more plentiful than men. I was lucky. I got a head start on the current situation in ’62. My first girlfriend taught me the rudiments of game. It took me until 18 to get the first one (actually she got me). They became more frequent after that.
October 27th, 2014 at 2:45 pm
[…] combined with Open Hypergamy promote a sexual marketplace based on enthusiastic consent for Alpha Fucks, and mitigated, […]
November 7th, 2014 at 7:17 pm
[…] now, proudly laying bare their Alpha Fucks / Beta Bucks sexual strategy, to the degree that advertising agencies are making blatant commercials about it, I’m starting to think that women hold (or are progressively developing) a subconscious level […]
November 11th, 2014 at 7:19 pm
[…] truths innate to the female experience is to be expected from women – until the advent of Open Hypergamy, the Feminine Imperative needed the sisterhood to be united and its secrets jealously guarded to […]
December 12th, 2014 at 12:46 am
[…] Open Hypergamy and the Sandbergian embrace of women’s sexual pluralism becomes more normative, so too will […]
December 17th, 2014 at 10:54 pm
[…] the recent embrace of Open Hypergamy and “Sandbergism” of the last two years has set this narrative on its head, and the […]
December 23rd, 2014 at 2:03 am
I find it rather amusing that women don’t think the unveiling of their hypergamy and the push of expectation won’t cause the majority of men to get back in touch with their masculine cores at the audacious disrespectful manipulation of it all.
I can’t wait for the results of all the other men coming to their own awakening, for women to find that their post-Wall safety net fall was really a plank dive. They will find themselves alone, childless, and old, with their only company being the other disgusting harpies that will sing the same sad tune.
The reckoning is coming.
December 26th, 2014 at 3:02 pm
[…] of Alpha and Beta being drawn I’d suggest this is due more to women and their comfort with Open Hypergamy and men deductively modeling their gender expectations as a result. That said, Xsplat’s not […]
January 10th, 2015 at 3:38 pm
[…] Feminism has only ever been an effort in retribution and restitution. Our present social state of Open Hypergamy and feminist triumphalism is an indictment of that […]
January 23rd, 2015 at 12:04 pm
[…] Most likely she's an Alpha Widow… Open Hypergamy | […]
February 6th, 2015 at 3:09 pm
[…] commercial is yet another shinning example of mainstream society’s increasing comfort with Open Hypergamy. In that post I outlined the conflict that occurs between women comfortable and prideful about […]
February 20th, 2015 at 12:52 am
[…] I started writing on SoSuave, and especially more now that I’ve detailed Open Hypergamy, I’ve had many guys relate a similar story about how their grandmother, mother or […]
March 13th, 2015 at 3:38 pm
[…] of their opportunistic concept of love becomes uncomfortably obvious to love-idealist men. While Open Hypergamy is becoming increasingly more obvious on a social scale, it’s far more poignant on a […]
March 16th, 2015 at 11:56 pm
[…] The de rigueur rationalizations and appeals to womanly “self-discovery” are handed out like the M&Ms any Red Pill man will come to expect, but I’m drawing attention to this book because it has the potential to be the next step in the 50 Shades of Grey evolution of Open Hypergamy: […]
March 22nd, 2015 at 8:11 pm
[…] The de rigueur rationalizations and appeals to womanly “self-discovery” are handed out like the M&Ms any Red Pill man will come to expect, but I’m drawing attention to this book because it has the potential to be the next step in the 50 Shades of Grey evolution of Open Hypergamy: […]