The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine


Building on the core works of The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine presents a poignant outline of the phases of maturity and the most commonly predictable experiences men can expect from women as they progress through various stages of life.

Rational and pragmatic, the book explores the intergender and social dynamics of each stage of women’s maturity and provides a practical understanding for men in dealing with women in those phases.

Preventive Medicine also provides revealing outlines of feminine social primacy, Hypergamy, the ‘Hierarchies of Love’ and the importance of understanding the conventional nature of complementary masculinity in a world designed to keep men ignorant of it.

The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine seeks to help men who “wish they knew then what they know now.”

The book is first in of series complements to The Rational Male, the twelve-year core writing of author/blogger Rollo Tomassi from Rollo Tomassi is one of the leading voices in the globally growing, male-focused online consortium known as the “Manosphere”.

Well, it’s been about a year in the making, but the print version of my second book is now available on the Createspace store and will be distributed through Amazon in the next 3-5 business days. If you prefer the digital format the Kindle version is also available now on Amazon.

I’ll be updating this to a permanent page once the print version of the book is live on Amazon.

I’d like to thank all my regular readers and commenters. It was your input and insight, and the questions we put to each other that made this book possible. I’m often asked why I’ve never moderated the comments on Rational Male, this book is why. I’d also like to personally thank Sam Botta for doing the forward and helping with promotion of my work.

I’ll be doing an ‘Ask Me Anything’ of sorts in this week’s comment thread if you have questions about the book. My purpose with this book is to formalize the work I did in the Preventive Medicine series as well as provide some support material. If you’re a regular reader here, you already know I make my material freely available, however, I have fleshed out a lot of the original content more thoroughly as well as adding some new material in the book.

Preventive Medicine is intended to be a complement to The Rational Male core works – an important supplement, not an extension. I’ve decided that future Rational Male series books will center on that core work for reference to more specific topics. I think you’ll find the organization and direction of Preventive Medicine much more singularly focused than the first book. This is intentional. There was no feasible way to present the first book’s material without familiarizing readers with a lot of varied Red Pill topics. The Rational Male will always be the starting point for any new work.

Once again, my hope is that readers will share this book with the men they feel would need it the most. I hope you’ll “accidentally” leave a copy on a table at Starbucks or a school library. I hope you give it to your teenage nephew and your middle-age best friend going through a rough divorce. If you buy the digital copy, thank you, but do consider getting the physical copy to share with someone who wouldn’t otherwise consider exploring the Red Pill or the manosphere online. And if you get into a conversation about the book be sure you let them know about the first book too. Please spread the word.

I thank you all most sincerely.


Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

182 comments on “The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine

  1. @alpha seed

    What do you think of this?

    I believe there’s a really old saying that applies here:
    “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.”

    I have friends that I’ve presented the ideas to and they’ve rejected them. While I’m concerned for their well-being (they’re having worse relationship results than even I have in many cases), I also know that they’re men responsible for their own lives. When ridiculed by them, I hand it right back and move on to something else. I don’t force it on them though. I make my arguments then ask them to simply think about the ideas instead of dismissing them out of hand.

    They are the only ones that can help themselves in the end. Don’t let it get to you that they won’t help themselves and maintain a crab mentality about your progress to justify their own decisions.

  2. @alpha seed, not much unfortunately. You’ll need to wait until they experience an example of female behavior I describe and tactfully point it out to them at the moment.

    Eventually you’ll come into contact with one of the dynamics I describe in the books or on the blog, that’s the time to remind them of it.

    My impression is your bandmates are conditioned Betas so anything remotely critical of the feminine will sound like hate or condoning rape. Just wait for the teachable moments and remind them.

  3. Ive been married 20 yrs, we have one daughter. My wife cooks me breakfast every morning, dinner every evening, when I want sex, I get it. She does all the laundry and all the grocery shopping. Many of her friends and some of my friends wives say crap like, “why do you do that for him?” Or, “IIIIIIIIIII would NEVER do that!” …”She treats you like a king…” Usually I just smirk and say somthing like, “Well when you’re a king you’re a king” or “Yea, I know, I deserve it”. More than once I’ve said somthing like, ” Bitch! If YOU married me, you would be licking the shit off my ass!”

    I’ve read almost all of your posts and now about half of the second book; completely agree with you concerning the dynamics, behaviors, drives and motives concerned. Your work is excellent and very well worth reading.

    However, we diverge concerning one crucial aspect.

    Your work focuses on men becoming red pill aware and over coming blue pill conditioning. This is good. I know all the work necessary to unplug, develop oneself, face reality is his. However, man is not solely responsible for his condition. Man is not the only gender involved. Reading all this and reflecting on it, a man easily develops the mentality that he is damned if he does, damned if he dosent, damned if he does-doesn’t, damned if he doesn’t-does, damned if he’s alpha, damned if he’s beta, damned if he’s MTGOW, damned if he games, damned if he doesn’t game. He’s alone in this and he is just fucking damned.

    I do not for one second think any woman with the ability to get a kindergarten education is so irrationational and unaware of how her actions hurt others. I believe women posses enough rational intellengence to predetermine the negative consequences of their actions to others and they choose to take those actions knowingly. They very damn well know what they are doing and the disasterous negative consequences to blue pill men.

    Rollo, YOU at a minimum imply that women cannot be responsible for their actions due to their solipsism, inate hypergamy, hard wired programming, etc. This is just another fucking pussy pass. It is just another excuse in direct support of feral hypergamy.

  4. ” damned if he does, damned if he dosent, damned if he does-doesn’t, damned if he doesn’t-does, damned if he’s alpha, damned if he’s beta, damned if he’s MTGOW, damned if he games, damned if he doesn’t game. He’s alone in this and he is just fucking damned.”

    Try this old wheeze :-
    “Frankly my dear I don’t give a damn ..”

  5. Amazing that i got completely ridiculed for reading this book and trying to help my friends who were in bad situations with women (by their own doing)

    Show by example, not by lecture.
    My Best Man was not receptive to Red Pill thinking at all. Then one day, it clicked, and he said “ADBG. I like your relationship. It seems like you call the shots. You say, it’s sex time, and it’s sex time.”
    He liked Red Pill ideas much more after seeing the results in action, and comparing them to the pussy-whipped Blue Pill losers he knew in college, or the can’t-land-a-date-ADBG from college.

  6. Rollo, thanks for people are people. I hadn’t read that one. We don’t diverge as much as I thought.

    No man has to take the shit. The decision is up to each individual. Regardless of gender, hypergamy, whatever; if you go through life expecting any kind of fairytale, you WILL get fucked and sooner than later. There are plenty of opportunists who will capitalize to your detriment on whatever idealism you embrace. Idealism is the basis of all sales. Best to get off any fairytale wagon sooner than later.

    Early in my career in the construction industry, an older mentor told me, “You cannot trust anyone”. He was stating a fact. He was not making a political judgement or complaining or painting a negative picture of humanity. He was simply stating a fact about construction management. In construction you get what you inspect NOT what you expect. Everyone “makes mistakes”, half asses things somewhat (some a lot more than others). EVERYONE lies at least a little. Probably everyone has stolen something.

    I agree no one is in total control and that would get boring fast anyway.

    But I also know I tend to get get what I INSPECT not what I EXPECT. This fact applies to ALL aspects of managing my life. If I’m not managing my life, then who is?

  7. This concerns women & children, woman’s natural primary love for her children, her “innate programming to love and nurture her child”. Mothers commit the majority of infanticide. Most babies that are murdered are murdered by their mothers. Look it up if you don’t believe it. This fact is contradictory to our well conditioned expectations of women and motherhood.

    A sociological analysis of contraception, especially the contraceptive pill, and the inspected NOT the expected nature of women may resolve confusion.


    Without contraception there is a likelihood of conception….especially during the “she wants to fuck an alpha” phase of her cycle. Sexual intercourse is engaged for the purpose of conception. In this case conception is intended. With contraception is intended to be prevent conception. The pill provides the most assurance against conception and without the encumbrance and disappointment of physical substances. With the pill, enjoyment is highest. Women have total control of the pill and whether they choose to be honest about it or not. The legal and medical professions ensure survival of almost every child born in the western world…..many would have died in the past. Today, most people publically embrace the convention that every human live is valuable to the extent that they “believe” every human life is sacred. If a woman conceives today, she has 6 choices; 1 bear the child and support it, 2 bear it and give it up for adoption, 3 abort it, 4 bear it and kill it, 5 sell it or 6 abandon it. Each choice has consequences. Notice ONLY ONE choice pairs the woman with her child. ALL choices are exercised. It is purported that most women chose number 1. However, there is a considerable number of women choosing 2, 3, 4, 5 or 6….aren’t there. This should tell us something about women. I will only mention how women regularly use their children against their fathers as psychological hostages to manipulate power and control and how the courts support it and how that manipulation confuses and can permanently damage the child emotionally. Do you think she really gives a shit about the child, or is she using whatever she can to “get her way”.

    No matter what you “believe” or pretend to your self and everyone around you, natural sexual intercourse typically leads to pregnancy. This is a biological fact. You can choose to pretend that there is some magician in the sky waving a wand around conducting our lives or that everything “started with a big bang” and by random happenstance subatomic particles arranged themselves and rearranged randomly over time in a progression that currently produced us. This is not about those imagined ideals. What is realistic is that sex leads to conception and contraception prevents conception. This is human intent controlled almost exclusively by the female.

    This is not an evaluation of human life, abortion, contraception or behavior. Such value judgments are pointless and the merits of arguments on all sides are rooted in personal desires and based on ideals, not reality. I am simply describing facts and observations. Some say abortion is a form of murder, and I agree from a factual biological standpoint. Abortion is the termination of a human life and without consent of the aborted. From a biological factual perspective, contraception is almost the same. Contraception is proactive abortion. It is an intentional interruption of the life reproductive chain process to facilitate sexual enjoyment and social manipulation for selfish personal gain. Again, just stating the facts and not even implying any value judgments. Take it as you desire.

    The true nature of ALL people-

    We are all selfish. If you do not want to admit that or you do not “believe” it, read and understand this next sentence. We are all selfish. We will do whatever we can to better ourselves with whatever perceived agent we have at our disposal to do so. This is just simply a factor of existing as separate individual beings. However, the self is primary to each of us and when a woman perceives her child threatens her plans for herself, she will put it up for adoption, abandon it, abort it, kill it, sell it or prevent its conception. The undeniable fact is that a number of women are doing these things and undoubtedly some who aren’t would like to. What do these facts tell you about the true “nature” of women?

    I have known numerous women who resented their children, considered them to be a burden holding them back from “living the life they always wanted”. Many women complain regularly about the responsibilities of “motherhood”. The well established conventional trope that “mothers sacrifice sooo much” exposes the reality of how many women truly feel about motherhood. If they are biologically predisposed to loving their children sooo much, then why is it such a fucking sacrifice? It is a fallacy to expect that women possess an innate biological and psychological capacity to nurture and direct love towards their offspring. Embracing this fallacy is no different than embracing the sole mate myth.

  8. Rollo posted the screen cap with “The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine” at #8.

    Do you sincerely want people to buy the new Rollo Tomassi?
    Spread the screen cap.

    Rollo pasted it here:

    Here’s a backup:

    People flock to the top 10 books. People follow the habits of other people. If it looks like it’s on top of the list, it must be great, so they buy.

    Spread the screen capture of #8 and watch it go to #1

  9. I had a long conversation with a close friend that’s earned more than most wealthy men will ever see in their lifetimes.

    She’s an innovator, inventor, founder with ‘exits’ and a feminist.

    She has founded and sold three startup companies you’ve heard of.

    One of them runs in the background every time iTunes and a few other platforms load on any device.

    She still successful, and like most people that are of great power and wealth, she’s kind and generous.

    Yes, she’s a feminist, yet she’s close friends with Warren Farrell. How can this be?

    1. She has a son.
    2. The schools want her son to act more like the girls do.
    3. There’s more, but you already know what it’s like these days for boys.

    Further, she’s not focused on the world of having it all through a JOB, or SLAVERY.

    She knows the wage gap basically a script that keeps people in slavery thinking about & arguing about the wage gap instead of entrepreneurship.

    She helps people escape from that slavery.

    That’s how it is that she can be close friends with Warren Farrell.

    She doesn’t have a job. Again, she’s an innovator and inventor that hires the best people to run things. She spends time with her family.

    She’s not funded to carry the agenda. It’s not her platform. Instead, she’s able to use logic and reason.

    I admit I was a little concerned about spreading the info about this book to her. You know, we have a lot of mutual friends that have influence.

    But she saw one of my posts about the book, and she reached out to me. She explained that she’s intrigued by “The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine” and she asked me which book to purchase first.. Volume 1 or 2?

    So, please, do not live in fear that you’ll be ostracized for sharing these truths that exist in these books by Rollo Tomassi.

    I didn’t lose my reputation, I earned more respect by sharing what I believe in!

    Guess what she’s reading on the plane tomorrow…

    Yep. That book. It made #8 on the Amazon top 100! “The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine”

    One last thing, she said, “If Rollo Tomassi is a pseudonym, what’s his real name? Is it Jesus?”

    My answer: John Galt

  10. Just got it on my kindle and I can’t wait. I’ll never understand how a guy who had his fun with women while young then made a good marriage could be motivated to keep thinking about these issues on deeper and deeper levels but we’re lucky that you do. Thanks.

  11. Most of the following is borrowed from Wikipedia…

    The Witch Game….

    Hansel and Gretel are young children whose father is a woodcutter. When a great famine settles over the land, the woodcutter’s abusive second wife decides to take the children into the woods and leave them there to be by themselves, so that she and her husband will not starve to death because the children eat too much. The woodcutter opposes the plan but finally and reluctantly submits to his wife’s scheme. They are unaware that in the children’s bedroom, Hansel and Gretel have overheard them. After the parents have gone to bed, Hansel sneaks out of the house and gathers as many white pebbles as he can, then returns to his room, reassuring Gretel that God will not forsake them.

    The next day, the family walks deep into the woods and Hansel lays a trail of white pebbles. After their parents abandon them, the children wait for the moon to rise and then they follow the pebbles back home. They return home safely, much to their stepmother’s horror. Once again provisions become scarce and the stepmother angrily orders her husband to take the children farther into the woods and leave them there to die. Hansel and Gretel attempt to gather more pebbles, but find the doors locked and find it impossible to escape from their house.

    The following morning, the family treks into the woods. Hansel takes a slice of bread and leaves a trail of bread crumbs to follow home. However, after they are once again abandoned, the children find that birds have eaten the crumbs and they are lost in the woods. After days of wandering, they follow a beautiful white bird to a clearing in the woods and discover a large cottage built of gingerbread and cakes, with window panes of clear sugar. Hungry and tired, the children begin to eat the rooftop of the candy house, when the door opens and a “very old woman” emerges and lures them inside, with the promise of soft beds and delicious food. They comply, unaware that their hostess is a wicked witch who waylays children to cook and eat them.

    The next morning, the witch locks Hansel in an iron cage in the garden and forces Gretel into becoming a slave. The witch feeds Hansel regularly to fatten him up, but Hansel cleverly offers a bone he found in the cage (presumably a bone from the witch’s previous captive) and the witch feels it, thinking it is his finger. Due to her blindness, she is fooled into thinking Hansel is still too thin to eat. After weeks of this, the witch grows impatient and decides to eat Hansel even if he is not fat.

    The witch prepares the oven for Hansel, but decides she is hungry enough to eat Gretel, too. She coaxes Gretel to open the oven and prods her to lean over in front of it to see if the fire is hot enough. Gretel, sensing the witch’s intent, pretends she does not understand what she means. Infuriated, the witch demonstrates and Gretel instantly shoves the witch into the oven and slams and bolts the door shut, leaving “The ungodly witch to be burned to ashes”, with the witch screaming in pain until she dies. Gretel frees Hansel from the cage and the pair discover a vase full of treasure and precious stones. Putting the jewels into their clothing, the children set off for home. Some swan ferries them across an expanse of water and at home they find only their father; his wife died from unknown causes. Their father had spent all his days lamenting the loss of his children and is delighted to see them safe and sound. With the witch’s wealth that they found, they all live happily ever after ( there is no such thing of course).

    Some interpretations propose the fairy tale may have originated in the medieval period of the Great Famine (1315–1321), which caused people to do some desperate deeds like abandoning young children to fend for themselves, or even resorting to cannibalism. Linguist and folklorist Edward Vajda proposed that this story represents the remnant of a coming-of-age rite-of-passage tale extant in Proto-Indo-European society. A house made of confectionery is found in a 14th-century manuscript about the Land of Cockaigne. Vajda is probably correct in his evaluation for two reasons. He was qualified given his vocation. His interpretation and the story (bizarre as it is) aligns with universal human psychology, sociology and sexuality rather than simply starvation. Cockaigne is a land of plenty in medieval myth, an imaginary place of extreme luxury (not just adequate sustenance but extreme indulgence like the candy house…) and ease where physical comforts and pleasures are always immediately at hand and where the harshness of medieval peasant life does not exist.

    Specifically, in poems like The Land of Cockaigne, Cockaigne is a land of contraries, where all the restrictions of society are defied (abbots beaten by their monks), sexual liberty is open (nuns flipped over to show their bottoms), and food is plentiful (skies that rain cheeses). Writing about Cockaigne was a commonplace of Goliard verse. It represented both wish fulfillment and resentment at the strictures of asceticism and dearth.

    The Land of Cockaigne

    There is another abbey nearby,
    a great nunnery in fact,
    up a river of sweet milk,
    where there is great plenty of silk.
    When the summer’s day is hot,
    the young nuns take a boat,
    and go forth on that river
    rowing with oars and steering.
    When they are far from the abbey,
    they undress to play,
    and jump into the water
    and swim secretly.
    The young monks who see them
    get ready and start out
    and come to the nuns immediately,
    and each monk takes one for himself
    and carries his prey away quickly
    to the great grey abbey,
    and teaches the nuns a prayer
    with their legs up and down in the air
    The monk that can be a good stallion
    and knows where to put his hood
    he can easily have
    twelve wives each year.

  12. Live Fearless –

    I’m sure many are “dying” to know who “she” is. Ahhh! the power of gossip.

    “She knows the wage gap basically a script that keeps people in slavery thinking about & arguing about the wage gap instead of entrepreneurship.”

    Most people do what they are comfortable doing. Most do not want to experience the risks of entrepreneurship. Many are happy where they are. We all started with low pay.

    John Galt – A fantasy man in a science fiction feminist soap opera drama with all the frivolous intrigue (including sexual intrigue) that could be mustered by a sexually frustrated adolescent minded female feminist author vicariously attempting to experience the sexuality she missed by writing shallow stories about extremely simplistic one dimensional characters…..and has no bearing on reality whatsoever.

  13. @not born this morning, re:

    “I have known numerous women who resented their children, considered them to be a burden holding them back from “living the life they always wanted”. Many women complain regularly about the responsibilities of “motherhood”. The well established conventional trope that “mothers sacrifice sooo much” exposes the reality of how many women truly feel about motherhood. If they are biologically predisposed to loving their children sooo much, then why is it such a fucking sacrifice? It is a fallacy to expect that women possess an innate biological and psychological capacity to nurture and direct love towards their offspring. Embracing this fallacy is no different than embracing the sole mate myth.”

    Exactly this. I have left this comment here and at CH many times. You are a great commenter. You get it.

    Exactly right. Contrary to FI blue pill narrative control MSM programming, women are not naturally good parents, at all, for many reasons. As you point out, even if they let their children live, they resent their children for ruining their bodies and taking away their “fun.” Especially in the modern era, I have stated that every pretty white woman younger than 30 who gets knocked up accidentally by an alpha is “one step away” from being the next Casey Anthony. The kid took away her “me time” too early, as they are now all programmed to think having a kid before 35 is too young. It used to be 30, but now they have moved it back another 5 years.

    Also, even when mothers can fake actually loving their children the way good fathers ACTUALLY love their children, mothers are still women, and everything Rollo writes remains true. They are emotional, not good at math or time-space reasoning or future planning, they are weak, they are not good at being safe drivers, they are not good at taking care of only themselves when they are single and childless (making bad decisions for which they now can never be judged, alpha fux beta bux). We can call it hypergamy and solipsism, but whatever the evolutionary/biological reason, another way to “call it” is to say they are (on average) simply not as smart as men, and certainly not as rationale. So even a loving mother will do things such as use a treadmill right next to a baby who can barely walk, letting the baby fall and get her hand trapped under the moving belt, thereby tearing off the flesh from the baby’s hand, get into car accidents, let the baby fall from the changer and land on its head, forget to watch and let the baby drown in the tub (extreme cases), etc etc etc. Women are clumsy, not athletically coordinated, selfish and upset/angry/emotional much of the time (and they take it out on the husband and kids).

    I cherish every second I get to have with my kids. Both divorced dads and even married dads (who earn the money for the family) don’t get to spend as much time with their kids as they want to. (But Time never writes a cover story called “Men Still Can’t Have It All.”) I cannot tell you how many times I have been in public watching a mother berate, yell at, be mean to, etc. her kid, and I want to tell her to shut the fuck up and appreciate that you have that kid with you. All the kid needs is a hug (or food), and he’ll stop crying.

    And this brings us to a very depressing reality if you want to think about it. Women in the 19th century or in 1930 or in 1950 were no different. What was different was THE LAW AND SOCIAL MORES. Simply put, women need to be controlled by men, society, laws, and customs. Women are now “liberated” to do alpha fux beta bux, be anti-marriage, anti-family, anti-children, and make all kinds of bad decisions that harm themselves, their children (if they have any), men, families, and our very civilization.

    Nothing will change unless we somehow effect a radical shift back to a time when the divorce laws and social mores controlled women’s behavior. And I don’t see it happening, as the far leftist socialists are in firm control of the government, media, law, banking, politics, and national discussion.

    The government and law part is crucial. The media is supposed to be anti-big government. Government naturally wants to slide towards socialism and anti-freedom. The media is supposed to be the “fourth estate” to guard against growing government! The media is supposed to be “on the right.” Today, of course, the very same group of elites controls both the government and big media (both old fashioned TV and the internet–google, twitter, youtube, etc.), as well as big private business. There is ZERO voice with any power that can state a rational, conservative, logical, message that respects FACTS, such as there are differences between sexes and races, obviously.

  14. @ anon

    Damn brother. I get you have been hurt in divorce and by a specific woman, but, don’t you think some of your vitriolic generalizations come out as “hatred?” I just think you are quite the connoisseur of all women…I think you are a bit “touched” my friend.

  15. Ok Rollo. I have “lost it”….

    I am going off the fucking rails!!

    Preventative Medicine – Intersexual Hierarchies – The Subdominant Model,

    “In the beginning of this section I stated that men and women’s approach to love was ultimately complementary to one another and in this last model we can see how the two approaches – idealistic and opportunistic – dovetail together. That may seem a bit strange at this point, but when social influences imbalance this conventional complement we see how well the two should come together”


    “That may seem a bit strange” ??

    Hell yes it seems “strange”. It is extremely strange that you wrote these words because you have primarily written volumes about the very negative results of men loving idealistically. You have cited numerous examples of this such as Blue Valentine. You refer to men who love idealistically as beta (and they are) your whole endeavor is centered around how men can avoid the pitfalls of such a mental paradigm and you warn not to embrace such a paradigm. Yet now you say “we see how well the two (we can see how the two approaches – idealistic and opportunistic – dovetail together) should come together”.

    “Should” come together?

    “Conventional compliment”…”Should” come together?

    What the fuck!?

    Was your mother like the girl in Blue Valentine?

    I’m reading on….

    1. Men’s idealistic concept of love is a buffer against women’s opportunistic concept of love. When that idealism is expressed from a Beta mindset women’s opportunism dominates him and it’s debilitating. When it’s expressed from an Alpha mindset it supersedes her opportunism to the relationship’s benefit.

  16. Preventative Medicine –

    “….when a man’s idealistic approach to love is in the dominate frame it acts as a buffer to woman’s loving opportunism that would otherwise imbalance and threaten the endurance of that family and relationship.”

    In all your previous writings you elaborate extensively on how man’s idealistic approach to love is his downfall and how it facilitates feral hypergamy. Yet now you are saying that same idealism exercised within an idealistic dominant frame is the preserver of the family and the relationship. Man’s idealistic love is the universes great white knight galactic rescue savior of all pussy and family? He just needs to operate in an idealistic state of male dominance to prevail? Yet everything you’ve written before states that the embracement of that ideal ensures subordination not dominance.

    So now it seems that you believe mans idealistic love in a “dominate” “frame” is the way it “should” be. This must be the most “alpha” of all masculine sexual ideals……fantasies…or perhaps the extreme of all betaism.

  17. If you want to use Blue Valentine as an example, the guy in the relationship abdicates all authority and ambition over to his wife’s opportunism. He idealistically believes “love is all that matters” and has no greater ambition than to please her and ‘just be himself’, because that should be enough.

    Consequently she despises him for it. She’s the de facto authority in the relationship and he slips into the subdominant (another child to care for) role.

    Now if a man’s Alpha, willful, idealism propels him to greater ambition, and to prioritize his concept of love as the dominant, and places himself as his mental point of origin for which a woman accepts you can see how this leads to the conventional model.

  18. It’s easy to characterize women’s concept of opportunistic (hypergamic) love as manipulative and duplicitous – and in today’s social environment they’re encouraged to exploit it – however, it is still a practical and deductive concept based on what women need.

    Likewise men’s idealism can be (and often is) his worst failing with women –again, in today’s social environment this idealism is used as men’s worst thumbscrew – but, without that idealism he would never assume to pursue his role of dominance (and not just in intersexual relations).

    In their rawest form, men’s idealistic and women’s opportunistic concepts of love are functional complements – how those concepts are expressed are manifestations of dominance or submissiveness.

  19. Sorry for the smart ass remark. I just cannot swallow the use of ANY idealism in loving a woman. I’ve sometimes been accused as being a “total asshole” for not following “conventional norms” or acquiescing to peoples bullshit. My brother labeled me a “Nazi” after I gave him the advice to get in the gym, work hard, focus on self improvement during his divorce from his first wife. He was literally balling and saying, “I just wanted to love a girl”. I thought he outgrew it in his second marriage until a few years ago he announced to everyone during a holiday celebration that he believed every woman “should have the right to say no “”at any time””…” He brought the subject up for the purpose of displaying his feigned consideration of “all women” in order to aggrandize himself. My sister and wife were both disgusted by his comment. I asked my sister, “So, you didn’t expect your daughters to bend over, pull off their clothes and beg him to fuck them because he is such a hero?” I thought my question would solicit total disgust. to my surprise it did not. They both burst out laughing. My sister said, “exactly”. My brother hasn’t spoken to me in 3 years.

    Enough about my brother though. I guess I can swallow the application of “true” love or idealistic love in an “alpha” dominated context. I could not love my wife unless she allowed me to dominate her and the relationship. And she is not so bad off, also I allow her a lot of personal freedom. She receives the benefit of my “love” because she is subordinate. I guess it is partially her subordination combined with her need for security that makes me love her.

  20. Maybe the confusion occurs when we men do not realize the difference between really loving and caring for a woman vs pretending to love and care for a woman to try and negotiate for sex. Before you can love another, you must first love yourself.

    1. @NBTM, the problems start when you expect your idealistic concept of love to be reciprocated by a woman. Women do not share the same concept of love that men are conditioned to believe everyone mutually accepts.

      That belief is where a Beta mindset and an idealistic concept of love (one in which men believe they can be loved in spite of their performance) becomes a dangerous liability to him.

      Men will still hold that idealistic concept whether they’re Alpha or Beta; the difference is the Alpha will control the Frame of that relationship and accept that a woman will never share his concept of love. In fact, this acknowledgement can be an excellent foundation of Amused Mastery.

  21. ” .. woman younger than 30 who gets knocked up accidentally by an alpha .. “
    Is that what she told you?

    [Spoiler: it’s never an accident. Unless … she discovers he was actually beta (or lesser). Then it’s off to the Clinic, and baby gets turned into gumbo. Without a minute’s regret, in my experience]

  22. Small Pecker, I did not write about a specific woman. Well, I did, but the facts about which I wrote were learned by observing thousands of mothers during my 10 years as a father. When you are a father of girls, you notice things. I’m a veteran of thousands of hours in parks, on the playground, and in school settings dominated by brainwashed modern women. I mean to add: elementary school teachers. It is a shame that teachers are paid so low and it is, indeed, a woman’s job. These same bubbly former cheerleaders are completely FI-brainwashed, of course (all women are inherently and unavoidably “blue pill”). These women are the school’s principal, assistant principal, librarian, and all of the teachers. They get our kids 6 hours a day. They are told what to teach, and the modern enforced program is a thing called “i-ready” or “ticket-to-read,” which never lets up in its effort to promote the idea that white men are evil and miscegenation, even if the lesson at the moment is math or science. It would be downright comical if the current situation in this world were not so serious.

    Have you heard of the phenomenon of “mommy blogs” and the fact that 50% or 80% of women are on prescription antidepressant meds? There is a well known problem–women are never happy, they can never be happy, and they will not behave unless law and culture controls them. They think it is sooooooooooooo haaaaaaaaaaaaaaard to be a mom, and never give a thought to the fact that it’s hard to be a dad too.

    I don’t have my own blog, nor have I ever written on reddit. It’s not just me. There is a well known problem of no-fault divorced fathers in this country.

    If you don’t have kids, you might not notice. If you have kids and care about them (beta), you notice things. All you have to do is go to any public place and you will almost always see mothers being mean, or at best, neutral, with their kids, acting tired and overwhelmed and taking it out on the kid, but if you see the dad, he will be having fun with the kids.

  23. @ anon

    I understand your pain. I feel that you are in a world of hate. Is that good?

    You have stated you have girls.
    Will you hate them? (they will become women)
    Should they be allowed to vote?

  24. This appears to be the gratz Rollo thread. Gratz on the book and making it to the top 10!

    Now where is the official discussion of the book thread?

    I just finished it tonight. Basically most of it is Rollo taking a post from the Chateau on gaming girls in different stage of life. He greatly expanded it to explain to men what they can expect and how to deal with some of the major challenges at each stage of a woman’s life span. There is more practical and actionable information from Preventative Medicine than any 1,500 page Developmental Psychology textbook.

  25. My 78 year old very well educated in classical philosophy and history uncles reaction to the manosphere and TRM follows.

    And no insanity doesn’t run in the family…

    From uncle Bob –

    I had been unaware of this phenomenon, but am not surprised. The little I was able to understand of the honcho’s inadequate vocals seems to be soft core, more or less, when compared to
    “…..WOMAN hear me roar of the 70’s.” The printed stuff I could read and understand was somewhat boring in a long-winded attempt to sound scholarly. I do not oppose these reactions
    from the manosphere. Every social expression of self understanding moves like a pendulum until it reaches a tipping point beyond which it is hideous to proceed. WHAM! The pendulum
    reverses direction until it accomplishes the same. WHAM!

    In the sociological macrocosm such swings seem to take about 6000 years to complete; Iron Age sociologists moved the pendulum from the Bronze age until recently in the USA. In the 6000 yr interim
    the manosphere had its day; female gods were banished all around the planet, whereas they had a thriving occupation in the Bronze Age. Perhaps humanity outside the Levant has seen the ugliness of Iron Age manospheric tipping points, which already forebodes the tipping point toward which we are headed for the next 6000 years of the female The male hating divorce courts of today are
    “selfies” of what was on the other side of the coin two centuries ago. The manosphere has good reason to start whining! I have been told that females control most of the nation’s wealth and all of the pussy.

    I have prostate cancer. Therapy regimen for two years has been injections of Eligard 3 times a year severely to reduce testosterone on which cancer cells feed. To a large degree I am functionally
    androgynal, i.e., seldom do I think of myself as an alpha penis even though I guess I retain the Y chromosome. I do not say that I now think like a woman, but I do say that “hypergamy” is no
    longer the issue it used to be for me. Therefore I am beginning to learn that humans can be humans even when they have no Y chromosomes. Envy, pride, fear, rivalry, power hunger, compassion,
    altruism, morality, ethical persuasions, etc. etc., are quite similarly shared by guys and gals. I cannot determine which gender should be given bragging rights for what they do with what is shared.
    I suspect there will be millions of pendulum swings before the XX vs XY gender differences will evolve into something else.

    In the microcosms we are seeing and hoping to manage, we should bear in mind the WHAMsical nature of all reformations good or bad. Maybe ISIS is showing us how die-hard folks accept
    inevitable change….not thought to be in the cards. I hope their conflict with the inevitable will not last longer than six millennia!

  26. @Sun Wukong “So here I find myself. Alive, learning Game, seeing if I can build a great Man out of all this scrap, still not convinced suicide is immoral or wrong, but also not convinced it’s my path for the moment.”

    I think everyone that reads here enough knows that you are one of the wisest commenters. I’m so glad that you found the RM… if anything I think you’ve helped many people here with your comments. I can’t believe so many men are driven to think of suicide over women – it really does prove everything Rollo has written about the way men love, are true romantics, etc.

  27. @GWADT

    I sometimes suspect suicide among unsuccessful males is an evolved mechanism. If they can’t fulfill the biological purpose of life (to create more life) and didn’t die directly from the competition over females, then it best serves the herd for them to die and remove the extra competition for scarce resources the young will need.

    Of course, to the individual it’s an act of rational pragmatism: this is a constant source of pain, I never in my life been able to alleviate the pain through the normal channels, this is the only logical choice I can see to make the pain (which is psychological but manifests as physical given as long as I’ve faced it) stop for certain.

    I don’t think it’s just that we’re romantics. Natured has configured us to feel physical pain over prolonged rejection and failure. That direct stimulus to succeed or die instead of hang around being a societal waste product.

  28. @small pecker: LOL. A female response. I love them more than a million times infinity. The answer is no. I don’t hate women. Women are how they are because of biological evolution. Do you read this blog? I am teaching them real facts about the world, however, trying to fight the evil narrative control they are receiving in school every day and everywhere else around them.

    Feminism was an attack primarily on women who did not need it, a tool of socialism, and an attack on children, families, and a civilization that, while not perfect, was the best attempt to give the best chance at happiness and safety to the most amount of people.

    Women were “liberated” to act as is described in the Adam & Eve story, and we see the results. The results are not debatable. Why is this blog even necessary? Why does this blog and Heartiste exist?

    Why are 70% of men between 22 and 34 now single? Women started the marriage strike (and the divorce explosion), and now men are finishing it.

    I worry about a world of a backlash. In 20 years, the institution of marriage will not exist at all, or barely, unless there is a radical shift back to sanity. That means my precious daughters will be denied the chance to have any good men to be a husband who will protect them and turn them into mothers who will be grandmothers.

    Fathers with daughters should be the most concerned with politics and big picture problems. A complaint about the craziness of feminism and the current state of affairs (emotional women without the ability to be rational or have any sense of future-time planning are given 100% sole power to destroy families because of their “feelings”).

    Another bit of feminine advice I’ve heard is “just teach your children well.” No man or woman is an island. We do not live alone. It’s not exactly this bad, but just for illustration: if my two kids grow up to be perfectly smart, well mannered, educated, ladies, but every other person in the world is a raving brainwashed lunatic running around with a machine gun shooting and pillaging, well, then that’s a dangerous world my daughters will be living in.

    That’s an extreme example, but the real world reality, on the path we are on now, is that there will be no good men willing to get married in 15 years. Women give it up for free (to the detriment of their future marriage value), are taught to be proud of it, and men who got married the last 15 years often got royally fucked in divorce court. This situation is bad FOR WOMEN.

    Do you believe that what Rollo and Heartiste write is true? Do you fully understand the red pill? We have a situation where 50% of all women under 27 now have at least 4 tattoos defacing their bodies, and 25% of them now have a nose ring!! They are taught nonstop to follow the path of the new Miley Cyrus.

    They ride the CC or shack up with guys without requiring commitment between age 19 and 35, and then at age 35, they go on dating sites and look for a “good man,” saying they want children “some day.” A 38 year old single career woman who is childless is THE most unhappy of any woman–more unhappy than married women in the 1950s were.

    No, I do not want my daughters to be single when they are 38 in a world where only less intelligent, more r-selected men have children (out of marriage) and kids grow up without a father. That would be bad for them. The current mainstream message to women is a lie, and a big one.

    To your question, sorry, but women voting has led to the current system, I’m afraid. If you interact with women and their pretty little heads, you have to conclude they are not suited for politics. Solipsism, inability to plan for the future–they vote “liberal” because “poor single mom” and “feed the poor” NOW, but don’t realize that only conservative politics are good for the most people over the long haul, and communism is a drag on those who would be the most productive.

    Normal, decent men have been under heavy attack for 20 years. That’s bad for women. The backlash is coming or is already 75% here.

  29. Our host and other “evo-psychos” (see above) may know this, but did you know there’s an academic field called masculinity research? Which just had a big conference on how to stamp out “repressive masculinities”, a/k/a “hegemonic masculinity” a/k/a competition, finding them even among Bronies, LOTR cos-players. There’s serious work to be done “identifying what [is] wrong with men, and how to fix it.”
    I.e.,finding the vaccine to Stamp It Out In Our Lifetime.

    Lecturers/presenters: Sheryl Sandberg and Naomi Wolf.

    Read the cited item for amusement, not rage. The alternate universe it describes is so far afield that the movie “Interstellar” looks like a walk to White Castle.

    Almost wish I could’ve attended a session for the lulz of it.

  30. Sun Wukong…
    “If they can’t fulfill the biological purpose of life (to create more life) and didn’t die directly from the competition over females, then it best serves the herd for them to die and remove the extra competition for scarce resources the young will need.”

    We were at the Rodeo last month… and these sweet men were educating us on male bees (one had brought his own bee colony for kids to see up close). They are only alive to service the female “workers” hive with babies, and when the males are no longer needed, they are shut off from the hive over winter – left out to freeze to death… it is an entire “civilization” run by the queen (Femcentric) who actually decides if she will birth males or female workers. It’s ironic in how this clear biology/scientific model of a female run society is so toxic to masculinity – the analogy of it is insane!

  31. Tsk-to-the-motha-fuckin’-Tsk, Rollo.

    I can’t help but to think: “Aww. I wish I was online when RT was finishing his first…”

    Think, now. What was I supposed to be doing while sitting in front of the souped-up MAC and PC (instead of posting at SS)?

    *ears back in dismay*

    All these criticisms about formatting/editing?

    You had that coming. And, I’ll refrain from channeling Benjamin Franklin to fully dress you down for it.

    Despite the “shit on my carpet”, I must sincerely congratulate you on the outstanding achievement(s).

  32. @Not Born This Morning



    What do they give women that have breast cancer? Arimidex … it reduces estrogen! Pass that on to Uncle Bob.

    Extreme risk since elevated estrogen with lower testosterone causes strokes, high blood pressure and cancer.

    I’m not a doctor, but the best doctors in the U S pulled me out of death after a hit and run accident. Arimidex (estrogen reducer) is one of my life-saving friends.

  33. @girlwithadragonflytattoo

    Quite actually, it’s not quite accurate to claim that the queen “chooses” which eggs are to be male or female.

    When the queen’s pheromones get too weak, it’s a sign that the queen is no longer effective, and for the future success of the colony, a new queen must be raised. So, any egg can be a queen, it’s a matter of how much royal jelly is fed to the larvae. Extended feeding of royal jelly ensures the extended development into the queen. All bees are fed royal jelly at the onset, but only for a few days, whereas queens get more, and for a longer period. It’s the workers that do the feeding and the “choosing” based on the queen’s pheromones (in the case of eggs becoming queens).

    Drones, on the other hand, are larger bees (smaller than the queen, larger than a worker female), and larger cells are provided in the comb. They are hatched from unfertilized eggs; mainly in the spring. Their sting has been replaced with male sexual organs, and after breeding, like a sting, the “stinger” that is the drone’s penis is ripped out along with the rest of the reproductive organs after “sex”. One-and-done, then they die, with their genitals likely still hanging out of the queen. Their only function is to breed the queen and die.

    After a winter devoid of males in the colony (they are kicked out for winter), the queen ultimately lays unfertilized eggs. The first eggs of the spring are drone brood, as they are unfertilized. Once the males hatch, they breed the queen, and the following brood is worker brood. Consequently, the colony grows and shrinks in accordance with the seasonal flowers/food supply. Winter is here? Time to kick out the males so they don’t eat up all our honey: we don’t need more bees, because there isn’t much work to be done, so we don’t need any fertilization until spring again. After the drone spuzz runs out, the eggs are no longer fertilized, and only drone eggs are laid (unfertilized).

    Clearly, it’s not so much a matter of “choice”, but one of necessity and survival. How the queen regulates the rate of egg-laying to extend the “spuzz ration” to produce workers that last until spring is another mystery.

    Fascinating thing about unfertilized eggs being males, though, hmm?

  34. Uh… I just double-checked my understanding of the queen. My “only need to breed once” understanding conflicted with what I was just explaining. I’m actually off a bit. The queen DOES selectively release semen, so it’s a matter of seasonal indicators. When the weather is springlike, then she’ll drop drones, but only to breed queens outside the hive, as a matter of species survival, not her particular colony’s survival.

    Dang… that’s crazy. A queen bee will store the sperm of 12-15 males she breeds with while flying outside of the hive. Apparently, she’ll store several millions spermies up in her abdomen for use during her entire lifetime.

    That “sperm shelf life” is counter-intuitive, I gotta say.
    I’m sure glad my sperm doesn’t have a 2-7 year shelf-life like that.

  35. Being disposable simply comes with being male in nature. Men are quite able to accept that as part of the cost of being the physically stronger sex. It’s generally portrayed throughout history as one of our most noble traits. It’s only when that disposability and our acceptance of it is treated with disrespect and contempt that men become indignant and angry about it.

    I have no moral or ethical issue with being disposable. I have a big problem with being subject to ridicule at both the personal and societal level for it.

  36. @ LiveFearless

    A general principle of anti-aging medicine (same as health optimization) is to restore youthful levels of hormones. In aging men, testosterone tends to go down and estrogen tends to go up.
    My Dr. prescribed testosterone to up T to the upper end of normal for young men and anastrozole to lower estrogen to the optimal level of 21-30pg/ml.
    He correctly predicted that my PSA would actually go down. It went from 2.7 down to 1.8. This is the opposite of the conventional ‘wisdom’ that TRT causes prostate cancer.
    But there is another reason why BP types are afraid of TRT – they are afraid of masculinity.

  37. @Jack LeBear

    You are correct. There is a wimp doctor in Beverly Hills that’s destroying men he’s jealous of. You know, he’s young, married with children, and for sure obligated sex is dispensed to him sparingly. He was “oversexed” for sure pre-marriage since, of course, his plan was to be a doctor in the middle of Beverly Hills, CA. He prescribes men Clomid as if this increases testosterone DELIVERY throughout the body.

    What doctors do not do is something that saved my life after the hit and run accident. Testosterone testing is not always complete. Most doctors seem to be completely oblivious to the FREE testosterone number.

    As I’ve written here before, it was explained to me by the doctors that saved my life.. that FREE testosterone is the delivery system of the testosterone you have in your body.

    It’s sad to see men reporting here at The Rational Male, at Danger and Play and at Bold and Determined and other blog comment sections words like, “My doctor said my testosterone level is 900, and that’s super high, so why should I inject testosterone?”

    The doctor missed the MOST IMPORTANT NUMBER: Free testosterone

    His T could be at the top, or 1197, but he feels like a girl.

    What is low free testosterone like?

    It’s like the day the man travels with his family to near Orlando, FL, to take his wife and children, for the first time, to Walt Disney World. At the gate, they apologize and make arrangements for full refunds AND they find (and cover the cost of) off property accommodations that are on the power grid that’s used outside of Disney Parks. They even refund the full amount of every round-trip flight/transportation and early flight back to their homes!

    This is bad. ALL sources of energy are out, nothing is working, all parks and resorts are closed for the first time ever!

    Again, since they’re only on the Disney Parks internal power grid, they can’t just switch over to the main pain grid in the region.

    So, there’s one technician, he’s up in the years, he knew Walt Disney after all. He is the only one that knows about the little switch nobody sees or cared to learn about. But it matters.

    Free testosterone is that little switch. You can even inject testosterone, but with low free testosterone, it’s just going to sit there. So the guy has no energy, until the switch is flipped. What flips that free testosterone switch back on?

    How does one solve the low delivery system? Humatrope

    For me, it was an urgent matter of life or death. Thankfully, some doctors did a series of studies and proved that low free testosterone is the reason that men with high normal testosterone are not getting it where it needs to go. Here’s the problem, most doctors have not seen it, or they do not care about the study.

    My doctors and their friends literally saved my life.

  38. @Jack LeBear

    Yes too many of them are afraid of LIFE and HEALTH and ACCOMPLISHMENT and WOMEN HAVING GENUINE DESIRE for a PATIENT! “Well, we can’t have that, of course not.”

    “Preventive Medicine” … NO! Must Ban… they say!

    Thank you for telling us about those improved PSA numbers. I hope all 7 million Rollo Tomassi students have taken notes from your words. And you’re right, anastrozole is the generic of Arimidex: A miracle most RM readers should consider… have an estrogen test that includes the full testosterone panel – including FREE testosterone. If they doctor refuses, get out of there and go straight to Yelp. Then go to an anti-aging clinic.

    After reading Rollo’s new book and applying what’s been learned, she’s going to be more attracted to him with GENUINE desire. He’s going to, of course, want to be in his best condition for performance. @Jack LeBear you mentioned “anti-aging medicine (same as health optimization)”

    I keep hearing that local anti-aging clinics want between $600 up to $3,000 yearly fee up front. There is one doctor in the U S that does not charge the prohibitive up front yearly fee, and everything is handled by email and phone if you’re in the U S but too far away from the Hollywood, CA clinic. The pharmacy is here in Los Angeles, and the doctor has it shipped to you.

    Why doesn’t he charge the fee? He’s been practicing for 30 years, he’s made his money already and he enjoys helping people in this way. He says it keeps him young, and he looks the part. The office is beautiful with views of the Hollywood Sign and the hills one side, and on clear days you can see the ocean on the other side.

  39. @ Livefearless,

    There is a lot more to health optimization than hormonal modulation, for example making sure you don’t have any nutritional deficiencies and eat the kinds of real foods that your genes expect (where are your ancestors from?) and getting the right kind of exercise (for me low volume high intensity strength training – it’s more cardio than cardio).

    While you need to pay someone for the use of their prescription pad, walking into an anti-aging clinic isn’t enough. You need to educate yourself on all the other stuff because anyone who profits from your lack of health has a conflict of interest about actually making you healthy.

    As an engineer, I made a point of engineering my own self when things went downhill in my early 40s. I made a lot of improvement when I learned about supplements from the Life Extension Foundation and optimal diet from the Paleo folks.

  40. Relying on Organized Medicine to take care of your physical health is like relying on the FI to take care of your relationship health.

    My acceptance of the RP was facilitated by my learning the truth about cholesterol, saturated fat and heart disease. That truth being that eating cholesterol and natural animal fat does not cause heart disease. That’s when I realized that the whole culture is insane, there is no one I can rely on to take care of me; they lie for profit, power, politics and pussy and I’m on my own to take care of myself. I discovered that I can do much better for my health and the health of those I care about than anything a doctor can do for them.

    Having said that, a hospital can be a life saver in the case of accidents and emergencies, but it is still up to you to defend yourself against iatrogenesis and restore your health after the MDs have done their thing.

  41. Wow, I was reading through the book today finally and realized I’m quoted in it. I’m honored. My words in print. Whoda ever thunk?

    Thank you, Rollo.

  42. I purchased the first volume on Amazon in print and was able to get the kindle version for a reduced price with Kindle Matchbook. When I went to purchase this one, it did not give me this option. Will you be adding this to Kindle Matchbook? Thanks

  43. Pingback: The Real You

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