The Red Pill Monthly – Frame

If youtube isn’t your thing you can get the audio archive here.

 

I managed to get some time with Niko once again yesterday. He was kind enough to stay up late and get a talk in for another installment of our semi-regular podcast The Red Pill Monthly (more like bi-monthly recently).

I really liked this one because we delved into some new stuff about Frame and the importance of establishing and maintaining a solid sense of self and purpose in all aspects of a man’s life, but focusing on the interpersonal and intersexual importance of Frame.

The concept of Frame is not my original idea, it’s actually derived from interpersonal psychology. However, way back in my early days at SoSuave I made the connection to the psychological principle and what PUAs of the time were advocating as a means to control in seduction. I begin my Iron Rules of Tomassi with Frame because I’ve always felt that everything else in seduction, and life in general, hinges upon the realities we create for ourselves.

The pop-cultural term for it today is ‘mindset’, but I feel the concept of Frame extends beyond what’s generally a retreading of The Power of Positive Thinking that’s being promoted as mindset now. It certainly plays a part in the entirety of holding Frame, but the overall establishment of Frame with a woman, with other men, with your family or with your employer requires an art that extends past just how one thinks of himself.

Iron Rule of Tomassi #1

Frame is everything. Always be aware of the subconscious balance of who’s frame in which you are operating. Always control the Frame, but resist giving the impression that you are. 

The concept of “frame” is yet another ephemeral idea that had need of a term in the very beginnings of the great masculine awakening that’s become the ‘community’. If memory serves I think it may have been Mystery who first picked up on what’s really a very rudimentary and well established psychological principle. In psych terms, frame is an often subconscious, mutually acknowledged personal narrative under which auspices people will be influenced. One’s capacity for personal decisions, choices for well-being, emotional investments, religious beliefs and political persuasions (amongst many others) are all influenced and biased by the psychological narrative ‘framework’ under which we are most apt to accept as normalcy.

Rather than go into too much depth here I’ll just encourage you to listen to the podcast and we’ll have an open comments thread about Frame. I think it’s good to review some older principles, not just for the benefit of newly Red Pill aware men, but also because I think it’s good to reconsider these ‘standards’ from a perspective of time and where we are as a Red Pill community today.

Frame, and understanding its importance, is the foundation of dozens of other Red Pill principles and applications. As most of my readers know, I try to avoid specific prescriptive advice. I’m not in the business of telling men how to live their lives with formulaic step-by-step Red Pill templates. The Red Pill isn’t one-size-fits-all and men need to interpret their Red Pill awareness according to their personalities, cultural context, social situations and personal beliefs.

That said, in the coming months I will be offering some more generalized, prescriptive ideas or suggestions as to how I feel men might apply certain Red Pill principles in their lives. The 9 Iron Rules are about as close as I come to prescriptive advice, and while I’m not in the business of making ‘Rational Male Men’, after reviewing them with Niko I think that some generalized advice according to Red Pill awareness might be something in the offing.

So, let me know what you think about this ideas as well as any questions or input you have about Frame once you’ve listened to our talk. It runs about an hour and a half. I’m also toying with the idea of discussing each of the Iron Rules in the coming RPM podcasts. Let me know if that’s something you’d be interested in listening to.

Enjoy!

rollo_t

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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walawala
walawala
3 years ago

On Dread Game…yes, don’t announce it unless it’s a hard next.

One thing I’ve said, or texted that has worked when the girl is giving massive amounts of drama is:

“Too much attitude. There’s no need to be in touch. Good luck.”

Then disappear. No matter what she’s done or what you’ve done, she will come begging back.

This text or word structure has worked for me in either cutting it off with dignity or soft-nexting.

SJF
SJF
3 years ago

lol, MAP whatever the title was changed to as a follow up to MMSL was a seminal work of writing. Who gives a shit if the subsequent purple pill stuff on his blog came along? I was late to the game and never read his blog before it jumped the red pill shark. So what. Despite the non-attractive name Blue Pill Professor’s book is a fantastic distillation of principles for married red pill in dead bedrooms. For married red pill, there are fantastic writers. Like Rollo, Ian Ironwood and BluePillProfessor and Athol Kay’s first two books. And it’s not like… Read more »

SJF
SJF
3 years ago

One thing I’ve said, or texted that has worked when the girl is giving massive amounts of drama is: “Too much attitude. There’s no need to be in touch. Good luck.” One thing lately my catch phrase in LTR game: “Good luck with that!” Said in follow up to Feminine Imperative logical thinking from the woman. When the woman doesn’t respect direct language from a man. A woman should only be allowed to voice what she feels and she should respect what a man thinks. And I think it has been registering, on occasion with either amused mastery, walking away,… Read more »

walawala
walawala
3 years ago

@SJF Yes. Something about “good luck”—the vagueness instills dread.

The “Too much drama” establishes a no-nonsense frame. Girls will always demand “Why?????” that’s an easy one.

The “no need to be in touch” is a non butt-hurt way of framing this as you walking away.

Treezus
Treezus
3 years ago

I have very high confidence, dickhead confidence. I can be nice to people, but even before I got into game I had been referred to as having an arrogant disposition. Because of this it’s easy to build attraction in a girl. However, I’m terrible at reading women as of to exactly when attracton is at a high level, and I should transfer into comfort. I bumped int a girl tonight who I had met two nights before. End of night. She was drunk and wanted to fuck, but I was being an arrogant dick. Like she brought up how I… Read more »

stuffinbox
3 years ago

Ref MAP

Male asset protection.
A network of local business men,not opposed to under the table pay,mechanics liens,or free storage.

scribblerg
scribblerg
3 years ago

@Kate – Nice thought, thanks.

scribblerg
scribblerg
3 years ago

@SJF et al – Re: Dread – I think I blew up my marriage by inducing too much dread the second time it laid the law down. I was being seduced by another woman, and it made me realize what an idiot I was being by hanging in a marriage in which my wife hated me. While I ended this intrigue, it gave my ex a very strange whiff from me, and I could tell it fucked her head up because I started behaving like I had options and they were real and close up. The first time I induced… Read more »

King Kunta
King Kunta
3 years ago

@ Ya Really and anyone else. Apologies for going on a tangent here, however, I have a field report and would like your input. Thanks in advance. Background: I went to the same school with this HB, almost 10 years ago but haven’t seen her since. She was a shy cutie, smart, good girl type. She clearly mistrusted me as she believed I was “a bad boy” and “cocky, arrogant” guy. I never had any serious interest in her because being a natural; I could sense she would be hard work. I did not have time to waste since there… Read more »

Forge the Sky
Forge the Sky
3 years ago

Hi em. Ya, I’m a very interesting person. That’s why this girl was so drawn/turned on by me. 😬 You see, all the advice Sentient gave was – hey, she’s attracted to who you’re being here and wants to bang you as a result. So PULL THE DAMN TRIGGER because she won’t. Girls make sex happen by creating openings for it to happen. Rarely by actually initiating. They need some unambiguous action from you first, then BAM she can reciprocate. All ya chicks have this thing where any sort of understanding on the man’s part about needing to make things… Read more »

Forge the Sky
Forge the Sky
3 years ago

@Scribblerg Haha yeah, this has been a trip to be sure! I missed the window on this one, I will see if another chance emerges. I have a feeling it just might eventually. 😀 The crazy thing is how incredibly easy (or perhaps I should say, simple but not easy) it was to flip it around. All it took was a) ignoring her for a few weeks, and b) just being my normal value-giving self to other people who were treating me better. Maybe a bit of dread as well, as I’ve been hitting it off platonically with another cutie… Read more »

Msam
Msam
3 years ago

@Yareally
Hey man, I was wondering what is up with http://yareallyarchive.com site. havent been updated for a while. its kinda annoying reading your material through tiny font comments. any chance for an update soon ?? <3 😀

redlight
redlight
3 years ago

“its kinda annoying reading your material through tiny font comments”

looks do not matter

Sentient
Sentient
3 years ago

King Kunta (?) Sounds like you killed it day 1. Day 2 sounds like a lock, the only thing to worry about is ASD from the good Day 1… So just don’t think that you can start right off from where you left… you may find out you can, but if you keep the thought in your mind that this is Day 1 over, you will defuse the ASD monster by NOT acting like it is in the bag, so she will be confused and chase you a bit more actually… Get the room if you have no other logistics… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
3 years ago

Who gives a shit if the subsequent purple pill stuff on his blog came along? Well, any thinking individual who wishes to be aware of the quality of on line resources, for a start. If a man asked me about Athol Kay’s blog, I’d steer him away from it for obvious reasons. The first book? Probably worth the cost, although there are better ones now as you surely agree. I was late to the game and never read his blog before it jumped the red pill shark. So? What does your personal history have to do with facts about Athol’s… Read more »

King Kunta
King Kunta
3 years ago

@ Sentient

Thanks for the tips man…Really appreciate it. I agree with your point on ASD. I though about that today. I am looking at option on best logistics right now. I’ll send her a little confirmation text tomorrow, then book the place.

Once again thanks.

Sentient
Sentient
3 years ago

It’s a shame what Athol’s thing has become… but you need to seriously question anyone who is doing this stuff for full time coin (Rollo is ancillary… everyone elseshilling stuff has a business model they are following and you need to pay attention to it.). But I grew a lot via MMSL years ago.. when the forum first started… Via Vox’s Alpha Game Plan link, which I initially thought was a finance site LOL… Interesting that most of the blogs (Rollo, Roissy etc.) have taken down the MMSL links… Funny though, that BBP is pushing dread.. having success with this… Read more »

Forge the Sky
Forge the Sky
3 years ago

@scray Thanks for the fr, I was laughing at the whole among situ. Well played. @hank re:your huge fr All good stuff, not much to add EXCEPT your texting vacation girl. I cringed hardcore when I read that. Probably because I did pretty much exactly the same thing not all that long ago. Over gaming, man. You’re trying to hook her but YOU ALREADY DID and now she’s just seeing what’s up and if logistics work to move things forward soon. Or pinging you cause she’s bored/horny and wants to see if you’re down for sexting. And then you just… Read more »

SJF
SJF
3 years ago

So? What does your personal history have to do with facts about Athol’s MAP? Well, I read the book which contained his MAP. And read his MMSLP. Which are both on the MRP reddit sidebar–an endorsement of theiron red pill value. So they shouldn’t be dismissed in red pill awareness/learning. I never read the blog so if it has purple pill issues, well, that is separate. And should be avoided by red pill enthusiasts. The MAP book was good and simple and straightforward and is still a good read. BPP’s was a distillation of that and a lot more. Cost… Read more »

trackback
3 years ago

[…] last week’s comments Not Born This Morning dropped this comment in the last […]

hank holiday
hank holiday
3 years ago

@forge Over gaming, man. You’re trying to hook her but YOU ALREADY DID and now she’s just seeing what’s up and if logistics work to move things forward soon. Or pinging you cause she’s bored/horny and wants to see if you’re down for sexting. was just trying to practice text game there. girl was kinda iffy since she’s like 17 and wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with her. just planned to meet her to run jester on and get in her social circle where I could meet more people. trying to balance between just straight up “meet… Read more »

Forge the Sky
Forge the Sky
3 years ago

@hank “was just trying to practice text game there. girl was kinda iffy since she’s like 17 and wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with her. just planned to meet her to run jester on and get in her social circle where I could meet more people.” Fine, but that doesn’t change much. Just work for the meetup not sexting. “trying to balance between just straight up “meet me at x play at y time” and having a bit of game in there. text game is hard to calibrate since neither she or you can get much of… Read more »

othergrain
othergrain
3 years ago

@hank “Was just trying to practice text game there.” “Really didn’t think about my responses that much lol.” So which is it? Practice applying what you’ve learned *should* work, and seeing for yourself (like you’ve been doing during your in person interactions) or just winging it, badly? Just to summarize, it took you 18hrs and 15min to sent 4 text messages. And they not just aloof (which only works if you have high enough value to her) but disqualify her. No shit you lost her lol Why would a 17yo girl waste her time talking to THAT when she can… Read more »

othergrain
othergrain
3 years ago

Excuse my typos and bad train of thought.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless 4g LTE DROID

anon
anon
3 years ago

Hi em. Ya, I’m a very interesting person. That’s why this girl was so drawn/turned on by me. 😬 Possibly, but I doubt it. Attraction is generally much more shallow than that. You see, all the advice Sentient gave was – hey, she’s attracted to who you’re being here and wants to bang you as a result. So PULL THE DAMN TRIGGER because she won’t. Sure. I get that. How do you pull the trigger though? Because grabbing the girl and making out with her just cause she gave you a few looks is not how it works in my… Read more »

Halp
Halp
3 years ago

Hello and thanks, RT (and the Manosphere) for the oh-so informative and supportive forum. I just joined SS as well. Thus, at once please permit me the opportunity to both provide a little education as well as an anecdote re: my recent fall from Alpha-grace, if you will. And forgive me please if this is not the best place for the post or if some of my thoughts are muddled but being new to the blogosphere…well, you know. -Halp …………………………………………………………………………….. Re: prior posts (e.g. on SS) pertaining to HSV/Herpes: Despite being a board certified physician – after unwittingly either giving… Read more »

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Epubliusrex
Epubliusrex
3 years ago

Interesting.

It all comes down to seeing yourself as the person you at least want to be and then doing it. No prisoners. Just be and do what is best for you and your long term goals. Anyone or anything that gets in the way of that needs to be pushed to the side–you’re on a mission. People either aid you or they hinder you in that mission. Those that hinder need to go–quickly.

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