Year Three


August 18th was the 3 year anniversary for The Rational Male. My apologies for not having dropped this post sooner, but I held off until September because I wanted to post the most accurate numbers I could for August. That, and I think I needed to hammer out the concepts of the past 3 weeks topics before they escaped me.

So here it is readers, three short years ago I finally decided to motivate myself to commit almost 10 years of SoSuave forum posts and all of those concepts into a unified blog – and then dare to write a book.

This has been an interesting and contentious year for me. In August of 2013 I had just returned to Nevada after living in Florida for the past 8 years. My work and living situation changed drastically, but now in hindsight, for so much the better. My relocation couldn’t have come at a worse time as I was about half through the first book I’ve ever attempted writing and had to delay it month after month as I basically rebooted my life and the lives of my wife and daughter.

I officially published The Rational Male on October 1st, 2013 and it’s been one of the best things I’ve ever done in my life. It certainly wasn’t easy and I’ve got a new edition, with better editing coming on the heels of the next volume of Rational Male.

Once the book published it allowed me to step back a bit from my blog writing to see how these core principles fit into a larger whole of where I wanted the blog and possibly the next book to go.

In just under 9 months the response has been truly humbling for me. That probably sounds like some standard bullshit an author is supposed to say – even calling myself an “author” still feels kind of strange – but when I receive emails and comments, or read reviews on Amazon about how what I’ve written in the book and blog has changed people’s lives, helped them to understand both women and themselves better, and even prevented suicides, ‘humbling’ is the only word I can muster.

I’ve had more than a few readers ask me if I’ll ever take up writing full-time, and I think the answer is always going to be ‘no’. I never set out to make a book or even writing my livelihood. I make a good living doing what I do, so I don’t need to write a book to supplement my income. I write because I feel it’s important to reveal how things work in intergender dynamics to help men avoid the traps and life altering decisions most make because they simply had no one expose what’s under the hood with respect to women and how the Game is played.

I also feel it’s important for me to stay in the game so to speak. To an overwhelming degree what I write is the result of the experiences I’ve had being long employed in various industries that keep me out in the world in a social context. I’ve had the unique experience of both being “in the field” and observing behavior while also being a married Man and father. Honestly, one of the reasons I decided to move back to Nevada was to maintain this situation. My place isn’t behind a desk (at least not Thursdays – Saturdays), it’s out in the world doing something, creating things and moments, and learning from them.

In three years I have never monetized the Rational Male, nor do I have any plans to do so. As my blog numbers have steadily risen I’ve had several opportunities to do just this, but this blog has never been just about me. I’ve always been pretty upfront with my numbers at Rational Male and as they’ve climbed I’ve always believed this was a watermark of how the manosphere on whole has expanded into popular consciousness. The rise you see in these numbers represents the growing awareness of the Red Pill, Game and men coming to understand the realities of the social and psychological landscape of intergender relations that they find themselves in.

Personally I find this very encouraging.

The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine

My most immediate plans for the rest of 2014 is to complete the next volume of The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine. I had initially planned this book to be a quick hit one-off ebook with an expanded focus on the Preventative Medicine series of posts I published this spring, but the rewriting and compiling fluidly blew up into enough material for a whole new volume.

This book, while still incorporating some past posts, has a deliberate purpose of helping men (both red pill and the uninitiated) to understand modern feminine nature so as to help them avoid the worst of the most common life-decisions with women as well as to aid them in understanding what’s happened to them in past, and what possibly awaits them in future relationships.

This will be the primary focus of the new book. The Rational Male I consider the core-work, but Preventive Medicine will build upon this core with a direct purpose. Preventive Medicine will be the answer for the men who “wished they’d had all of this information before” they made the choices they made, and to help them understand why they did.

Moving Forward

Lastly, I’d like to state now that this blog has been, and will continue to be the testing ground for red pill / Game concepts. It will continue to be an unmoderated forum, and as such, as a marketplace of ideas, sometimes this means considering blue pill dissent and occasionally outright trolling. I’ve always felt the benefits of open discourse outweigh the nuisance of simple myopic hating, and more often than not I’ve been rewarded with having my commenters make the same counterpoints to these individuals I would’ve made myself. This is a wonderful gauge of how well men (and some women) understand and internalize the ideas I’ve offered here, as well as educating me of things I may not have considered about those very same ideas.

I should also add that despite the occasional suggestion that I moderate the comments I’ve found that in 3 years my commenters really moderate themselves and others. I think this is a testament to the sincerity and genuineness of interest in those commenting over the years. I’d like to thank you all for keeping this standard of commenting. One of the best compliments I get is when a newly unplugged guy lets me know that he benefitted as much from the level of discourse in the comments as he did from a particular article that brought him to The Rational Male.

The message and purpose of The Rational Male will never be watered down, and certainly never for the sake of my personal betterment. The unvarnished, sometimes difficult truths of the red pill will continue to be this blog’s priority. The purpose of this blog isn’t affirming anyone’s relationships or dogma, or compromised by anyone’s individual circumstance; neither is it meant to discourage those relationships or foster a hopeless nihilism – the purpose is education.

What anyone takes from that education I leave to the individual. I will continue to provide my own insights and what I may think are ‘best practices’ with regard to what this education represents for men (and I encourage others to do so as well in the commentary), but ultimately what works best for myself or others may not be what works best for someone else.

As I’ve stated before, I don’t want to show you how to become a better man, I want you to show you how to be a better man. What’s discussed here will often show you solutions or give you actionable information about how to make yourself a better man, but in the end it must come from you.

Thank you all for your involvement in making this blog a better collective experience for everyone.

Here’s to another year of Rational Male.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

54 comments on “Year Three

  1. Rollo, I was introduced to the manosphere because I bought your book, reeling from a nasty divorce.

    Like so many others, if only I had known all the wider forces at work, just how doomed my beta dreams were, I could have set a new course without being busted and a couple hundred K poorer. 🙂

    But I guess the most painful lessons are the ones you remember best.

    Thanks so much for being there, in book form, to explain WTF was going on. The rest of the internet sure wasn’t going to.

    Best of luck to you and the RM.

  2. The book the Rational Male changed me forever. I had been readin PUA and game stuff from age 13(21 now) I was an inquisitive kid but I never could internalize it. I mean it worked so well that it was like I had cheat codes but deep down I was aching for a deeper understanding of what was going on. Your book did that for me, I can honestly say if I didn’t read another book on inter sexual dynamics and I would be fine. I am still going too but now that I now the foundations of societies programming I am ready to see the world for what it is, not what I would like it to be

    I am forever grateful thank you Rollo

  3. Congratulations on a great three years. I look forward to every post. The Preventative Medicine Series is like a set of ancient scrolls that were lost for generations and then found.

  4. Congrats Rollo on the 3-year anniversary! I truly believe your work and writing is invaluable for men in navigating the current environment.

  5. Today a college student I’ve known for a while told me about how his girlfriend recently broke up with him. He’s attractive, plays college sports, had a cool internship and he’s super smart. He’s a nice guy with values.

    She moved on to a less attractive, more selfish, guy.

    Before, there was no place to send nice guys. Then there were places, but most of those required purchasing a series of programs.

    “The Rational Male” respects his values and those of his parents while giving him the tools (for free) to make the necessary changes that will improve the rest of his life.

    I’m in gratitude every day that this body of work exists.

  6. Thank you, Rollo, for all of the hard work and insight. It seems that whenever I have doubts or questions regarding a relationship with a female in my life, one of your blogs gives me a timely refresher that has helped me to maintain not only my Frame, but also my mind set toward all women. As a recent divorcee, your work has helped me more than I can ever say here, and in turn I have done my best to share my knowledge with others. I am a better man today than I can ever remember being before, and I owe that in no small part to your work. Thanks again, and I greatly look forward to all your new posts and information.

  7. Your blog and your book help me understand som major issues, women´s dualistic mating strategy, their nature, their solipsism, femisentric society that decreases value of men, and most importantly what is the best way for men – improving look, career and attitute towards women by killing beta mindset… generally how to be a better man because this is what attracts women.Thank you for ” Rational male” Rollo those red pill issues are transatlantic..applicable in Europe too, respect…

  8. Congratulations Rollo. Yes, the comments are just as big a deal as your actual posts; and certainly there are a number of regular commenters who have as big a following as your actual blog. It’s great that you would acknowledge them. I congratulate and thank them too.

  9. Happy anniversary.

    I believe the comments here strike the best balance of insight, utility and personality, in the ‘sphere. I hope this continues as TRM becomes more popular (and, with some, more infamous).

    I’m fairly recent to RP, but despite my public reticence about these matters, I have been able to refer several male and female friends to RP source material, and your book and this blog are usually #1 and #2 in that regard.

    I hope you continue to publish on paper as well as electronically. (I have the book in both formats, and have sent it to guys in both.)

  10. Congratulations Rollo!

    I discovered RM 3 months ago, and been reading 2-3 hours a day!
    I am 63 and has changed my life.
    Rollo, Thank you, thank you, thank you……you have no idea the impact you have on improving peoples lives.

  11. Thanks Rollo, excellent work. This is an oasis of sensible and well thought out work in a sea of hyperbole and click-bait. Your words always give cause for reflection and consideration, I am glad you have chosen the high road of non-monetized work, it keeps it much cleaner and more level headed. Thanks again and congratulations.

  12. Rollo,

    Your blog changed my life. Eternally grateful for your dedication. My very best wishes to you and your family.

  13. I’ve enjoyed this blog and it’s many insights ever since YT’s Stardusk pointed me to your War Brides article. I’ve told many friends to read here; unfortunately most ignore it. I really feel that a male who isn’t reading this blog is handicapping himself. Thanks to you Rollo and to all the commenters. I’ll be reading RM till I’m in the grave.

  14. Rollo: I’m 38 and have ingested a lot of Manosphere writing in the past two weeks, but I will always remember that it was your “Best of Year One” and “Best of Year Two” collections that made me mature ten years in four days. From your posts, I vaulted into Mike at DangerandPlay and Krauser at KrauserPUA to give me guidance.

    I appreciate both the boldness and even-handedness with which you write. There is no cynicism in what you say, just hard-won realism. And because of that realism, I never felt like you were trying to “sell me” either anger or bitterness. And so your sincerity made it so much easier for me to accept what you say, and improve my life because of it.

  15. I appreciate this blog a lot, Rollo.

    It’s good to know that there’s still some blogs out there where one can express worldviews and not have them moderated for the sake of the mod’s feelings. Every man out there deserves to hear all sides of the red-pill so that he, in the end, can come to his own conclusion on just what the red-pill means for him.

    Nonetheless, I’m very interested to see where you’ll take the blog next year.

    Good luck with everything.

  16. Congratulations to you, Rollo, on your 3 year anniversary and I hope you continue your excellent work for many more years. As someone who’s only been following your blog since the early spring of 2013, I can definitely state that the material found here has been invaluable to me.

    Your writings have radically changed my mindset regarding women, relationships and manliness and I really can’t articulate enough how much this information and the forum you provide has altered my life. Your website is the cure to a version of masculinity that’s been co-opted, re-written and hijacked. You’re right; armed with this dangerous knowledge, what man in his right mind would EVER go back to his former Beta lifestyle?

    Best of luck to you in the final months of polishing and editing your next book, and count on me ordering a number of copies as holiday gifts for friends and family who need it.

    Mike Phil

  17. The Rational Male is the intellectual justification for all of Red Pill Theory and it is on my shelf right next to my Bible.

    Rollo, I hope your new book on preventative medicine will also focus a little more on choosing and maintaining your marriage, LTR, harem, or plate strategy and not entirely on the AWALT and PussyPass stories- as entertaining and necessary as those might be.

    Happy 3rd Birthday and hopes for many more. You have helped tens of thousands of men (and women!) improve their lives and in the next 3 years I foresee it rising into the millions.

  18. You don’t have to devote a paragraph of the book to it, but is there an evopsych reason your femtrolls are so mindbuggeringly prolix?
    Even in 10pt, once they latch on, there’ll always be literally yards of barely-comprehensible spew and carping even if people ignore them, page after page, same old stuff reiterated endlessly until the thread dies of old age. Like they don’t actually care if anyone’s listening to a word.

    Does my head in, if I forget to put a brick on the spacebar and go for coffee.

    Whereas mantrolls prefer the in-out shiv of a one- or two-liner.

  19. Congratualtions Rollo, I signed onto the manosphere three years ago when my X went midlife crazy. Being an older man (56 at time of marriage implosion) your site fit my situation a lot better than the ones mainly aimed at game and guys under 40. Thanks for all your razor clear posts and helping me on my own way back.

  20. Rollo, thank you for providing the theoretical framework that makes sense of all the other RP ideas I have seen. Without that, all I saw was recommendations devoid of logical justification. My understanding has greatly increased thanks to your hard work.

  21. I’m inspired by the no-nonsense aproach to all your posts and topics. The Red Pill is bitter. Believing in fairy tales and Disney romances gives Blue Pill Betas some false hope to believe in. It’s always harder to shed those illusions and instead start believing in yourself. A lot of us guys were raised to be people pleasers and predicate our success on whether we “got lucky” or found “the one”…

    The fact I’ve banged 10 girls this year all under 30 and all who understood what the interaction was about confirms for me what you have been saying all along.

    Thanks and congrats on this milestone.

  22. The prophetic statement of Ghandi, “first they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win”, holds true today just as strongly as it did when he penned it. The writings and teachings and commentary of the Rational Male are a hunger satisfying oasis in a desert of starvaiton. People ask me all the time why I never want to get married and why I never want to have kids. It is the pearls of wisdom, mostly contained within here, but a few from other sites of the manosphere, that spell it out perfectly.

    For me, there are two posts in Mr. Tomassi’s content that are prolific and epic… is sexual market value and the other one is the rationalization hamster. Women will go to great, borderline absurd lengths to rationalize away their bad behavior. Along with that, they will spend the best years of their life giving away sex for free to loser douchebag pieces of worthless shit then want some average or below average Joe to open up their wallet DEEP for the last 1 to 2 percent of their SMV…..if they even have that much.

    It is these two aspects of female character that consciously keep me from ever wanting to get married or have kids. Rollo saves men’s lives, their bank and retirement accounts, and their sanity and i’m quite certain he knows that.

    I salute you sir. I don’t know if yo’ure a servant of God, but you’re definitely a servant of men. Keep up the good work and I can’t wait to see Volume II.

  23. Your still not as alpha as Willy Wonka in his prime but I take it on rationalist faith that this website is generating a revenue towards a Chicagoan chocolate factory.

  24. I was just over at MMSL and I was reading Athol’s actual Blog up front for the first time in ages. I noticed he has done a few interviews with them. They seem friendly to his approach from what I can tell. Worth a poke.

  25. ” . . . familiar with ? ”

    God no. And now that I am more familiar with them you’ll have to excuse me; I have to go lather up with Calamine lotion.

    In the future, if anyone should inquire what I think of them, I shall send them here.

  26. First of all: Thank you Rollo.

    You established a place of freedom open to everybody where the foundations of RP are established and discussed. You “don’t teach old dogs new tricks” like in other blogs (that is also important but as a suplement not as the main pill), you “provide the theoretical framework that makes sense of all the other RP ideas I have seen” (great comment jacklabear).
    I think that independence was possible because “you dont need this”, so you can focus in the sharpness of the content not in the profits. That sharpness of the knowledge (that you don’t find anywhere else) drive people into here.
    I’m sure the world gives back to you everyday, maybe not in money, but in respect and goodwill. And If your life change and you will ever need to cash in I’m sure nobody will say no to you. Your name will be out there for a long time, you can be sure of that.

  27. RE: MGTOW: The concept of MGTOW has always existed… (it was just never referred to in any specific way) until one day – quite recently – some dude came up with this abbreviation called: “MGTOW” as if it’s something completely new… which “arrived from nowhere”, which has never existed…

    The fact is that somewhere along the line (modern) men became (so) insecure that they felt they HAD to prove themselves all the time (!) by (feeling they have to be) chasing pussy 24/7 and then “sharing their experiences with other men”…. not unlike women…

    Real men just get on with it – if they choose not to chase for a while, they don’t. That’s it. Simple. No need to prove anything, either way. Or discuss it – OR feel insecure about it! (They used to just get on with a hobby).

    Of course nowadays these dudes who “go their own way”, just like their ancient forefathers did, are now somehow considered to be not the norm.

    In the past all men used to be MGTOW at times, except for the real insecure men who HAD to be with women (or have a woman) at all times (!). (until the arrival of television which gave us all in idea about what “real men” are all about)

    Today’s alpha is yesterday’s beta.

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