The Wall

Not to belabor the fresh input contributed by new Rational Reader ‘S’, but her recent comment regarding The Wall has made me aware that I haven’t yet gone into too much detail regarding the Wall and its socio-psychological effects upon women:

Yeah, it’s a term I have seen before arriving at this blog but have never heard in reality. I always attributed it to a woman losing her looks but to place it at exactly 30 seems to me to be too precise a calculation…as there are many variable to be taken into consideration I would imagine. For example, a party girl, serial tanner and smoker could probably lose her looks long before she reaches 30, whereas a clean living late bloomer might not even realize her potential until her mid to late twenties. I’ve seen women from my school..the most popular girls (with guys) changed the most in a negative manner and the nerds or just the most unexpected girls have become more attractive over the years. It’s freaking odd.

The infamous Wall a woman reaches (or slams into as the case may be) is somewhat of an ambiguous term that was actually coined by catty women long before the manosphere came into existence. It used to be a relatively less combative term that women used for one another in an effort to disqualify a sexual competitor. A woman implying another woman had “hit the wall” was marginally more polite than calling her a slut, but the latent purpose is still the same – disqualifying a sexual competitor from men’s mating considerations.

The Fear of Decay

Underneath the obvious utility of the Wall as an epithet is a more painful truth; the inevitable decay of women’s sexual appeal – their first, and for most, only, real agency of power they’ve ever actualized over men to ensure their long term security needs. In the heyday of 2nd wave feminism, the sisterhood’s message was all about collective empowerment and solidarity, but beneath that was the intrinsic hypergamic need to compete for the best mate their looks and sexual availability could attract. As I’ve written before, women prefer their combat in the psychological and there are few fears women harbor as deep and as long as losing their sexual agency with men. They know the Wall will eventually come, and they don’t like to be reminded of it.

Women’s intrasexual combative use of the knowledge and fear of the Wall did not go unnoticed by men. Therefore the feminine imperative found it necessary to make the truth about the Wall as socially and individually subjective as possible. As with most uncomfortable truths unique to women’s weaknesses, the feminine creates social conventions and ambiguities to misdirect men from becoming aware of women’s eventual powerlessness over them (i.e. the progressive loss of her sexual agency). The Threat of having men become aware of women’s Achilles’ heel before they could consolidate long-term commitment with their best hypergamic option was too great a risk not to form social conventions about the Wall.

Implications of the Wall

Thus, in an intergender social context, the Wall became individualized and subjective for women, and it’s within this framework that women like S are most comfortable in addressing the reality of the Wall. “Not all women are like that” (NAWALT), the go-to mantra of feminized subjectivity, is a direct result of subjectivizing the inevitability of the Wall. In fact, virtually every operative social convention women rely upon for empowerment and self-esteem finds its root purpose in avoiding the fear of the Wall. The Myth of Sexual Peak, the Myth of the Biological Clock, the social convention that Women are just as Sexual as Men, are all very complex social rationales with the latent purpose of convincing the majority of men and women alike that post-Wall women can still be equally effective sexual competitors with pre-Wall women.

It’s important to bear in mind that all of these complex social conventions are rooted in a fear of the Wall. I’m repeating this point to emphasize the importance this has in a feminized society that’s subjected to feminine hypergamy as its most operative doctrine. When enough women, through cultural forces or personal circumstance, can’t capitalize upon what they think is their due, optimal hypergamic male option, then society must be acculturated to believe that women past their Wall expiration date can and should be just as desirable as those in their prime. Think of it as a retroactive social moving of the feminized goalposts. This is the gravity and extent that the fear of the Wall plays for women – feminized society is literally structured around avoiding it.

Defining the Wall

When I wrote Navigating the SMP, the reason I used 30 as the general age women typically hit the ‘Wall’ is really a combination of factors. Most importantly it represents the threshold at which most women realize their lessened capacity to sexually compete with the next generation of women in their ‘actualized’ sexual peak (22-24). However, there is a male part of the Wall equation that needs to be understood. 30 is also the general age at which men (should) become aware of their own, longer-lasting sexual market value and potential. This affects women’s interpretations of the Wall. Once a Man is aware that he has the capacity to attract the sexual attentions of the younger women he’d previously had limited access and understanding of, his actions and imperatives define the Wall for women who are approaching that threshold. And unsurprisingly this is the point at which Wall-fearing women begin their accusations of men’s infantile ego issues, shaming, etc. for preferring younger women than themselves.

When we (and as women in particular would have us) view the Wall in terms of physical attractiveness we don’t see the full picture and relevancy the Wall has for women. It’s very easy (and often fun) to compare pictures of girls we knew in high school with their current FaceBook profile shots at 40+ years old and get a laugh at how bad she hit the Wall. It’s also easy for women to point out the notable exceptions to the rule and find a hot 38 year old woman with 3 kids competing in the Ms. Fitness USA pageant. It gives them a sense of hope about their own decay.

However the Wall is much more than just the physical; it’s the conditional that accelerates or decelerates a woman’s date with the Wall.

Single mother? Acceleration.

Consistent, bad personal habits? Acceleration.

Careerist obsessive? Acceleration.

Obesity? Acceleration.

Do notable exceptions to these exist? Of course, but they prove the rule. And that rule comes in the form of such an overwhelming fear that contemporary society needed to be restructured to help avoid it. The 38 year old, careerist, single mother of 3 competing in fitness pageants is only a hero because of the fear of the Wall.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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@NoQuarterForCatLadies

I’m not sure it depends on the girl. I wouldn’t go out with a 6ft 2inch man if he lacked compassion. I’ve been asked out by men who are 6ft 6inches and men who are 5ft 6inches…height for me is not an essential. Maybe that’s just me.

@milch,

This article is sad. 27 and they are “Unwanted”??..I’m sorry but the only “ugly” or old looking 27 year olds I’ve seen are the ones that have abused their bodies. In the late twenties a woman should still be looking relatively fresh. It is clearly a cultural thing.

Wilson
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For every exception who maintains any attractiveness in her 30s there is at least one woman who lost most of her attractiveness in her teens. Was traumatic seeing The One lose all her beauty by 20, and I don’t mean by getting fat…

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[…] Male – Value Added, The Wall, White Knight […]

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[…] The Wall The same situation exists with Betas/AFCs you know. If you tell them the truth- they’ll say you […]

Feminism is Bollocks
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Jesus C, GeishaKate is f*cking retarded.

hesaidhe
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Approaching the wall, cannot deny it. Cannot explain what it means to female friends who have seriously turned to cats for love, continue digging through dick, or simply given up on themselves in exchange for potato chips and Huffington Post’s latest list “what women should know at 30” list. How can a woman explain it? Unravelling without a final resting place. Fans of Breaking Bad: Ever noticed Marie’s (Hank’s wife) inclination to steal (though she can afford whatever she desires) and lie to strangers about her children (though she is child-less). The show only hints at her emptiness, but her… Read more »

Rollo Tomassi
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Cannot explain what it means to female friends who have seriously turned to cats for love, continue digging through dick, or simply given up on themselves…

You forgot ‘Sexual Fluidity’
http://rationalmale.wordpress.com/2011/09/01/sexual-fluidit

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[…] When women hit the wall – http://rationalmale.wordpress.com/2012/07/18/the-wall/ […]

X
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A female’s attractiveness doesn’t take a swan dive after 30. It tapers out slowly and often quite gracefully

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Shallow «
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[…] to shame men’s natural arousal/attraction cues being based on physicality. As I detailed in The Wall, women have a life long relationship with the impending decay of their only real agency over men […]

ChickenDippaz
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A woman’s attractiveness doesn’t take a swan dive after 30. It tapers out slowly and often quite gracefully

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[…] market value) progression where she becomes cognizant of her SMV decline and impending date with The Wall. Generally this occurs in women’s late 20′s and possibly early 30′s but as a […]

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[…] is probably why she is clinging on so desperately to Alvin. She knows her dating market value is declining QUICK, and she hopes to lock Alvin down as soon as possible. The thing about men is our market value […]

Tatle
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When do men “hit the wall”?

Lex Luthor
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I have a question:

Can a post – wall female still be attractive?

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[…] in the face of a hardwired hypergamy, while facing the constant, inevitable, progression towards the Wall.  Cash in too early and face the nagging doubt she could’ve consolidated with a better […]

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[…] moment in that, while she’s still attractive as she’s aged, she sees the Wall for what it is finally and requires some sense of catharsis, some degree of absolution, for having […]

Red Pill Woman
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“It’s very easy (and often fun) to compare pictures of girls we knew in high school with their current FaceBook profile shots at 40+ years old and get a laugh at how bad she hit the Wall.”

I just feel like that’s mean…the sort of hateful glee a lot of guys get in the manosphere about the wall is not nice.

JamesSavile2
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When a woman hits 30, her vagina is going to turn dry and churn out dust

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[…] their life. So, for instance, they don’t marry until (or get divorced) past the age of 30, despite that this is well after they’ve peaked in value. Or, more women go to college, but then they accrue tens of thousands in debt in a major that […]

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[…] of social media and social conventions intended to alleviate the anxiety of the approaching Wall. However, the underlying psychology of that indignation is rooted in women being forced to […]

Spacetrash
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Wow. None of you poor idiot boys are getting laid, are you? What sad little dears.

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[…] constant search for a man they consider “her equal”, and is the cause for many post-Wall women’s common lament of not being able to find the guy she thinks she […]

M Simon
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Bonding is how women beat the Wall. It is how they can keep a man even after they fade. Women no longer know how to bond. If they ever did. Dudly Do Right’s girl friend, Nell, knew how to do it. “My hero”. Sigh. But it does look stupid. But it does work.

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[…] I should point out that a 3:1 pairing may also be the result of a 2:1 pairing that lasted into a man’s peak years and bumped him up a point, or more likely, the woman depreciated down a point or more as she hit the Wall. […]

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[…] the most undignified, undesirable, and unappetizing proposition a man should never face. A post-Wall spinster used up after riding the cock carousel who will never respect her husband (for choosing […]

Dori
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LOL, I love how having a career somehow accelerates ‘the wall’ oooh, don’t get a career little girls of the world! You will magically age faster!

Brekkumsen
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“The age of Wall impact varies from woman to woman, but it generally converges for most women between the early 40s and 50. Some exceptional female specimens with a fortuitous suite of anti-aging genes can perhaps extend meager traces of their former physical glory well into their 50s, but these are exceedingly few in number. 99% of women you meet in daily life will have hit The Wall by their 50th birthday. An unfortunately larger minority of women will have been unlucky in beauty longevity and hit The Wall as young as their early 30s. Sadly, tragically, the first glimpses… Read more »

Rollo Tomassi
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CH has much lower standards than I do.

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[…] to acknowledge her decaying SMV and lessened capacity to compete in the SMP (i.e. the impending Wall) we conveniently see 27-30 year old women preferring and pairing with men who are, or are just, […]

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[…] detailed explanations of The Wall from The Rational Male and from Chateau […]

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[…] graph on top was taken from the site rationalmale.com and completely shows the relationship of the SMV and SMP indents in both sexes. If you can look […]

Northern-Guy
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The “wall” is a bad term. Some women gradually decline from 30 onward, and some fight frantically to keep their physical shape and appearance up into their 40’s or even 50’s. The latter are rare, and I think they “fall off like a rock”, where most women have this slow but noticeable decay. I am in my mid forties – non-smoker, non-drinker, exercising daily… and I am watching pounds melt away and years melt off my face as the stress of being married to a demanding and needy woman is now gone. Even the added stress of being a part-time… Read more »

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[…] slowed by offspring, habits such as diet and exercise, and overall pleasantness and femininity.  Rollo Tomasi has a great article about The Wall that goes into further detail about these […]

tickletik
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It’s ironic that the picture you are using for this article, is of a grandmother with a family who is praying at the western wall. I can tell by her clothing and ethnicity, that she is probably a Jewish religious married woman (religious women cover their hair). Her wrinkles and face tell me, she’s a healthy older women, which means she’s probably had a good 6-8 children, since a woman who is willing to cover her hair in that manner probably doesn’t use contraceptives. And consequently she probably has grand kids. The wall itself is almost certainly the Western wall… Read more »

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[…] slowed by offspring, habits such as diet and exercise, and overall pleasantness and femininity.  Rollo Tomasi has a great article about The Wall that goes into further detail about these […]

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[…] awareness a woman has of her sexual market value in relation to her eventual date with the Wall can no longer be subconsciously repressed and […]

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[…] Artículo de Rollo Tomassi, The Rational Male […]

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Trophies |
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[…] was an effective convention then because it played on women’s fear of the Wall and built upon their, feminine-as-correct, moral / intellectual superiority of men, who could only […]

mick
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thanx Guys, very enlightening, and ,no i ‘m not buying the “privacy ” EXCUSE for the female who won’t post her picture,… how,…. CONVIENENT

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[…] reach their mid 30s. Their ability to attract a quality mate, drops accordingly. This is called the Hitting the Wall in the manosphere.)  Sensuality and beauty, natural or created, does temporarily put an […]

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[…] of your actions, moreso for women, whose sexual market value suddenly drops when they hit “the wall“. I’ll be honest and say that men don’t have it that hard, and rightly so, based […]

Baines
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Ridiculously late reply, but I just had to acknowledge the brilliance of NoQuarterForCatLadies last post. This thought experiment really nails the concept at the gut level.

Matt
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When women are approaching The Wall, they realize that Winter Is Coming smile

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[…] world has been created to allow for greater hypergamy for women and an extension before hitting The Wall. Online dating results in a 3 times higher rate of divorce as well, and we all know how well divorce […]

unilantern
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This is a myth, i can tell you how i know. Any man would pass up a 20 year old in shape woman who is strong and athletic for a 30 something feminine type in a dress who is willing to submit. Its the same reason men pass up pretty young women from a lower social class bracket in favour of more mature well spoken mutton. So keep up with the clock ticking nonsense, and remember time waits for no man. I will let you know how i used to think for most of my 20s! And how i think… Read more »

unilantern
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I bet i will be there at 40 with unconditional freedom, as in no harassment no matter what i wear or do!

Tick tok!

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[…] New commenter (and I use the term loosely), unilantern, graciously provides us with some insight on this with her comments on The Wall: […]

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[…] “The Wall” is the psychological model that governs females behavior in their 30s, then “happiness […]

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[…] the counter-question: Why should a never-married or divorced woman who has hit the wall think she deserves a Silver Fox who can clearly do better? She […]

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[…] Re: Physical Turn offs – Man's appearance Here's a great example of a red pill swallower going on and on about how ugly women are when they hit that wall…and all the things that make her even uglier….and how much fun he has comparing pictures of her in high school compared to her at 40+….how much does anyone want to bet this dude looks like Homer Simpson? The Wall | […]

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[…] preoccupation with The Wall was ostensibly mitigated by the Free Love social contract that men would honor their end of the […]

Leo
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My wife has had 7 babies and I love her madly. She looks beautiful and other men mention it (they don’t understand how it could possibly be). We were both virgins and married young. It’s “The Solution” for manosphere. Woman at work and at restaurants flirt with me, but I love her. Marriage ain’t perfect but nothing is. The reason women start divorcing at age 40 is that they aren’t having babies at home (like they did for the last 10,000 years). **Woman are normal when they have babies.** That’s how they have existed in nature for millions of years.… Read more »

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[…] to be a better judge of a woman’s character – or at least that’s the anxiety that the Wall engenders in […]

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[…] The planning women had at 19 when they told him to “wait for me at 30″ now becomes more urgent as she becomes more viscerally aware of the Wall. […]

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[…] back when; and while their feminine conditioning has finally made them desirable for your just-pre-Wall long-term security necessity, they have gotten older and a bit more peculiar. No worries, Brittany […]

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[…] Popular culture likes to teach women and, by association, unenlightened men that there is an innate biological clock inside each woman that slowly ticks down to a magical period where her maternal instincts at long last predispose her to wanting a child. Perhaps, not so surprisingly, this coincides perfectly with the Myth of Women’s Sexual Peak as well as conveniently being the age demographic just post or just prior to when most women hit the Wall. […]

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[…] Women wonder, “Am I sexy?  Can I attract a sexy man?”  Rollo Tomassi writes about this at The Wall. […]

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[…] The Rational Male adds value to the discussion: […]

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Plan B |
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[…] The planning women had at 19 when they told him to “wait for me at 30” now becomes more urgent as she becomes more viscerally aware of the Wall. […]

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[…] hysteria of finding a man didn’t exist. They had the tribe their entire lives. When they hit the wall, when they were no longer sexually viable to males, she has long satisfied her biological […]

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[…] Patsy is the living embodiment of a once beautiful woman who has run head-long into the metaphoric wall. While still able to get into exclusive events and bed young men, as the series progresses she […]

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[…] овој феномен е познат под името: „Ѕидот“ (1, 2, 3). Се работи за „ѕид“ во кој жените удираат ако ја […]

Yollo Comanche
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@Leo

Shit, you might be on to something there….

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[…] The above doesn’t even touch on other anti-scientific positions of the American Left, in particular their views on intersexual dynamics between men and women, and their denial of the existence of the female biological clock (or should we say “The Wall”). […]

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[…] patriarchal society. At the same time, you’ll get older feminists, who have long since hit the wall, stating that sexuality is degrading to women (when it appeals to men) and women should not doing […]

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[…] about a socially conditioned definition of attractiveness fails them. The first, you may guess, is the Wall; the point at which a woman realizes she’s no longer able (or less able) to intra-sexually […]

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[…] of several, if a woman marries at 25 and divorces at 35, is trading up in terms of mate quality very likely? I think we all know the answer to that […]

Dizzle
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I went to church this morning, and this lady walks in and sits next to me. Frumpy, 5’3″, maybe 200 pounds. Like a 3, maybe. And she’s oddly familiar….and it hits me.

She was the homecoming queen when I was a senior in high school 30 years ago. I assume she’s still the entitled, snotty, stuck up bitch she was then.

Anyway, the wall was not kind to her.

Playdontpay
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Bumped into my high school crush last night in a bar. Back in the day she was a solid hb9, blonde, super hot body I tried but never got anywhere with her but come to think of it nobody else in my year did either. Heard she became a hairdresser and married a rich guy. She came into the bar with hubby last night to celebrate her 49th birthday and I have to say she didn’t look good. She wasn’t fat but all her youthful beauty was gone, the light had gone out of her eyes, her skin and hair… Read more »

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[…] Epiphany Phase is really a woman’s subconscious knowledge of The Wall coming into her cognitive acknowledgement. However, what’s not so easy to grasp is why a […]

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[…] to men – is perishable. This then is the nature of women’s very intimate relationship with the Wall; they know on a hindbrain, limbic level and from a very early age that their sexual agency rises […]

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[…] on the top of the world. And for some that can be true, at least for a while. She will hit the wall sooner or later but for now that concept is completely abstract to her. So she acts […]

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[…] The hawt chicks of the week are posted with sexual market value in mind. Click on the link, look at the chart, and there you have it; the average sexual peak for women is 23 years old. Why would I be posting images of women who have passed this point and impacted the wall? […]

Neo50
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One of the obstacles I’ve run into to fully internalizing the RP mindset is when a decent HB I’m spinning ends up flaking for a different guy – I still feel rejected, mope around, and review every date, text, whatever to see where I went wrong. This happened recently as I’ve posted elsewhere on this blog, but it keeps bothering me that I still react this way. I know I’m valuable — I am 50 and have the physical/social/financial status and attract women in their 30s and 40s fairly regularly — so when this most recent one bolted after 6… Read more »

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[…] of your actions, moreso for women, whose sexual market value suddenly drops when they hit “the wall“. I’ll be honest and say that men don’t have it that hard, and rightly so, based […]

Gupta Punjabi
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I just read the stupidest article written by a woman, blaming men for women over 30 being unable to find “good men”. She had a couple of white knight sociologists to back her up.

I kept saying WTF out loud as I was reading it.

https://www.theglobeandmail.com/opinion/why-are-good-men-so-hard-to-find/article36365252/?service=amp

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[…] expected it would coming from a less-than Hypergamously satisfied woman who’s well past the Wall. Rather than craft a concrete article about her own inner conflict (and by association all […]

Jodi
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I HAVE TO ASK… SO CAN AAN, (ALPHA) ACTUALLY ‘LOVE’ HIS WIFE EVEN THRU HER 30’S AND SO ON, IF SHE IS TRYING AND MAINTAINING HER PHYSICAL/MENTAL/AND SEXUAL ABILITIES? OR IS THIS ‘WALL’ JUST THE TIMER THAT LETS MEAN KNOW ITS TIME TO DUMP HIS WIFE AND FIND SOMEONE YOUNGER????

Yollo Comanche
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@Jodi

Sure he can. Not every single alpha will, but most of them.

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[…] that she made this into a business. It was a message with an eager audience of women approaching the Wall. More authoritative voices echoed her […]

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[…] But then I got to thinking about it, and now have some theories, human societies make it a point to bring up children with an pre-programmed package of “you already know that”. This is a form of “no one knows why but it is so and if you ask about it you are stupid”. Now you have the fear of being tagged “stupid” and you stop questioning things. They draw a line in cultural and intellectual discourse and crossing it makes you “a weirdo”, “kinda retarded” etc. And the social of pressure of being labelled a idiot and being… Read more »

Dawn K.
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>The infamous Wall a woman reaches (or slams into as the case may be) is somewhat of an ambiguous term that was actually coined by catty women long before the manosphere came into existence. Interesting. Had no idea, I’ve only ever seen it used in things like MGTOW blogs or Red Pill subreddits. Then again, I don’t usually hang out with women. >Underneath the obvious utility of the Wall as an epithet is a more painful truth; the inevitable decay of women’s sexual appeal – their first, and for most, only, real agency of power they’ve ever actualized over men… Read more »

SJF
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Dawn K

Does your index and ring fingers resemble the picture on the left or the right?

comment image

Dawn K.
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My ring fingers are longer than my index fingers. I have more testosterone than the average woman, or at least a greater sensitivity to it. Why?

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[…] Lauper was right, Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. They will ride the cock carousel until finally hitting The Wall & entering their Epiphany Phase. Some women (most notably) single mothers never quite find […]

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jesus motherfucking christ

neo50
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I like to read this post whenever I experience an unceremonious end to a relationship. I had one end that way recently where she was 43, and she moved away for a job that she thinks will advance her career (which she claims to have sacrificed for raising her one child as a single mother). Women of course maximize their sexual agency, but as a 50+ year old, I have had a front row seat how the ravages of age weigh on women’s attractiveness during their 40s. For most, save for a very small minority, the acceleration of the wall… Read more »

Dawn
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Why would you even want to be with a woman who thinks that her looks is her main “source of power” in the first place? Such a person sounds shallow and most likely doesn’t have a great personality to be around. I know I could never date a handsome man with nothing between his ears.

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