Beta Game

Before I launch into this proper, let me define a few terms in the fashion that I interpret them. With the popularity of Roissy’s blog and a few notable others, there’s been a new push with regards to using the terms Alpha and Beta (and sometimes Omega) when describing certain classifications of males in modern culture. Allow me to go on record as viewing these ideas as mindsets whereas terms such as AFC or DJ are really states of being. For instance, an Alpha can still be an AFC (called a ‘paper alpha’) with regards to women. A Beta male can still be as wealthy and astute in status as his conditions and fortune have placed him in (often by circumstance). Some states necessitate certain mindsets – a positive masculine state requires an Alpha mindset as a requirement – others do not. Also, don’t make the mistake of associating success (personal and career) with an Alpha mindset. There are plenty of Alphas on hotchickswithdouchebags.com, however that doesn’t necessarily make them well rounded individuals. I tend to think of the ideas Alpha and Beta as subconscious energies or attitudes that manifest themselves in our thoughts, beliefs and actions.

Beta Game

Alright now, with this in mind I’d like to propose the idea of Beta Game. Since we’re using the Alpha and Beta terminology here, it’s important to grasp where it comes from. Anyone with even a cursory understanding about animal social hierarchies knows the principal of Alpha and Beta individuals within a social collective. Alphas tend to be the males who exhibit the best genetic characteristics and behavioral skills that put them at the top of the potential breeding pool. In fact Betas are rarely mentioned as such in scientific studies; the Beta term, in PUA lingo is really something of a novelty. Relating these terms to human social interactions, while at times a subjective stretch, isn’t to hard to find parallels in. We can see the similarity, and the applications in long term and short term breeding methodologies that mirror our own.

Like any other Beta animal, alternate methodologies had to be developed in order to facilitate human breeding under the harsh conditions of Alpha competition. In essence, and as found in the wild, Beta males have developed (evolved?) methods which attempt to ‘poach’ potential females from an Alpha’s harem, or at least in this case his perceived, potential harem.

Identification

Beta male game focuses primarily on identifying and assimilating themselves to be more like the women they hope to connect with, but it goes further than this. The methodology dictates that the Beta be perceived as being unique (or at least set apart) from the more “common” Alpha males whom his desired women naturally prefer. This is the beginning of the “not-like-other-guys” mental schema he hopes to evoke in his idealized woman.

Due to his inability to compete with an Alpha competitor in the physical, he must fight a psychological battle on his own terms. This involves convincing his target that her best parental investment should be with him (as per her stated requirements) as he more closely embodies her long term prerequisites. The Beta likens himself to her (and women in general) in an effort to maximize his compatibility and familiarity with her and the feminine.

This identification process is then further reinforced through the feminine social conventions he subscribes to. Feminine society (both beta men and women) rewards him for more closely assimilating its ideal – be more like an archetypal woman; sensitive, empathic, emotional, security-seeking, etc.. And not only this, but take de facto feminine offense when presented with anything to the contrary of a female-positive perspective. Lift women up, become less so they become more, and in reciprocation she’s more apt to breed with the Beta.

That’s the principle, not necessarily the reality. In some ways it’s a Cap’n Save a Ho mentality written on a grand scale. The fallacy in this of course is that like should attract like. They fail to understand that opposites attract, and most women don’t want to marry other women, least of all a carbon copy of herself.

Disqualification

When presented with a competitor of superior status, both sex’s innate, subconscious reaction is to disqualify that competitor from breeding in as expedient a method as possible. For animals this usually involves some kind of courtship performance or outright competitive hostility. And while the same could be said for human beings, our natural social impulse requires we take a bit more tact. “Look at that girl, she must be a slut to wear / act like that”, or “Yeah, he’s pretty good looking, but guys like that are usually fags” are an example of the standard social weapons people use to disqualify their respective sex. Disqualify the competitor on the most base level – question their sexuality. Literally cast doubt on competitor’s sexual fitness to breed with potential mates.

While most men (Alpha or Beta) will make similar attempts to disqualify, the Beta’s methodology ties back into his need for feminine identification in his disqualifying a competitor. Essentially he relies on feminine ways of disqualification by drawing upon his likeness to the women he hopes to emulate (thus furthering potential attraction as he thinks). The competitor may not be gay, but he must be cast as inferior to himself due to his competitor’s inability (or lessened ability) to identify and empathize with his desired female.

With Alpha competitors, the field has already been plowed for him by feminine social conventions, all he need do is plant the seeds. The fact that the Alpha tends to embody the masculine opposite of what he’s embraced also feeds this drive. Women aren’t attracted to the macho tough guy, they want a man who’s kind and thoughtful; a good listener. So the natural recourse is to amplify this disparity – he’s a 1950’s neanderthal throwback, he’s “bitter”, he’s a misogynist, he’s a child in a man’s body with a fragile ego only interested in fucking women and moving on. He’s unlike anything on women’s collective stated list of prerequisites for an acceptable male. He must be ridiculed – as all women ridicule – for his selfish hyper-masculinity.

Furthermore, the Beta needs to make the Alpha seem common, while making himself seem unique. In order to effectively AMOG an Alpha, the Beta has to show his empathy for the feminine, and she must appreciate it or it’s been all for nothing (which it usually is). Not only is this an ego preservation mechanism, but it’s also perceived as a tool for achieving the desired sexual reciprocation / appreciation he desires.

Interpretation

All of this really just scratches the surface of how Beta game has evolved. I’m sure there’ll be more input as to different methods that Betas use to facilitate breeding – sexual fetishes / preferences come to mind. I will add though that all of these methods come back to a common root; the need to breed under the duress of competition. Most of what I’ve gone into here, and primarily the feminine identity association, become ego-invested and internalized over the course of a lifetime. It gets to the point that under the auspices of relative anonymity (like the internet) that the Beta will still cling to his mental model, even in the face of very rational, empirical evidence to the contrary, for no other reason than that a woman, a potential mate with whom he could identify, might read his post and may become attracted to him. The Game is never dropped for him, even in light of proving his errors. Beta game is like the boy who decides to play on the girls team when a boys vs. girls kick ball game is started. He thinks it will endear himself to them, when all it really does is make him another girlfriend to giggle with.

Everyone has a Game in some respect. We don’t live in a vacuum, our ideas about seduction (in whatever form) is influenced and / or learned externally. The validity of that Game may be more or less effective, but at some point a man is going to adapt to a methodology of seduction as per his conditions and environment warrant. Even mPUAs still need to adapt their Game for differing environments – different clubs, types of women, socio-economic levels, countries, etc. – there needs to be adaptation and improvisation. The same applies for Betas, but the disparity is that the Beta tends to think of a one size fits all approach. For all the complaints of worry about the Game community turning into scripted ‘social robots’, it’s actually the Beta who adopts a far more embedded script and is less likely to variate from it. Betas tend to stick with what worked for them, what was reinforced for them, in the past.

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YOHAMI
Guest

“This involves convincing his target that her best parental investment should be with him” Man. I read that and my body hurts. So many years spent “convincing” women they should be with me, and trying to prove “Im not like these guys” just to lose the girl to one of these guys. Beta Game, if it even worked… I dont think Betadom is kept because it ever worked. Its more like a treasure, a lottery ticket, a salvation thing. Its the promise that it will work, one day, that you´ll get lucky, that you will find the soulmate and will… Read more »

Neecy
Guest

Rollo, Let me ask you, do you think there is possibly a “middle ground” guy who can exhibity both Alpha/Beta traits and still be successful with women? Or is it simply one or the other. Also, do you think what happens with the negative look on Betas is a lot of guys adopt beta traits to manipulate women by acting like the nice guy and so some women become distrusting? I think possibly the guy who tries too hard does come off as manipulative or passive/aggressive even if his intentions are good. I think all women have been around a… Read more »

Marellus
Guest
Marellus

Beta Game went hand in hand with mass feminization. As you yourself wrote this has been going on for about half a century. But what was the trigger ? What caused the transition ? Was it : 1) Universal Suffrage ? 2) Women entering the work force during WW II ? 3) Television ? 4) First Generation Feminists like Betty Friedan etc ? 5) Legislation ? 6) Cheap firearms ? (The first US states to allow women to vote were “frontier” states where the women had to learn how to use a gun) And how will it be undone ?… Read more »

YOHAMI
Guest

Betas are not the wolves in sheep clothing. The betas are the guys that circle around you friendly, taking your side, acting like a peniless girlfriend, and some day you realize they have a crush on you. Theres no “wolving” here, more like a very, very timid effort to please you so you get to know the real him, while at the same time compensating you (with attention, money, favors, whatever) for not being up to your standards. At least by the definition of Beta in this sphere. With this definition, theres no middle ground, because Beta represents only the… Read more »

Deep Dish
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Deep Dish

I have a question:

Guys who learn alpha game go through a predictable pattern. When they are finally rewarded with the prospects of a relationship, they let their guard down, crumble, chump out, and get unceremoniously dumped. In my own recent experience, the alphaness of my game softened up as the psychological pressures lead me down that predictable path. I know the answer is the game never stops, but how can game become so internalized that it withstands the pressures of reward?

Neecy
Guest

@ YOHAMI, Awesome reply! thank you for the clarification. I never use terms like Alpha and beta to describe males but I can see in GAME how its effective in distinguishing certain characteristics. And ITA with your last paragraph. A healthy man is one as you described and one in which I believe most women respect and want. But I do wonder if the Beta guy you described does somehow (although unintentionally) make it difficult for HIMSELF and the woman he may have a crush on by not simply being forward about his affections. B/C what it does is kind… Read more »

Rollo Tomassi
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Rollo Tomassi

Try not to think of it in terms of “Game”, but rather as a breeding strategy or methodology. A lot of contemporary Game advocates get upset because they think that by Beta Game I’m inferring that being Beta is as legitimate a way to getting laid or beginning an LTR as any other variety of Game. I’m not, but Beta AFCs fervently believe they have an effective form of Game. They have Game, an ineffective and potentially life damaging Game, but a Game nonetheless.

YOHAMI
Guest

got it.

YOHAMI
Guest

Yes it can and does come off as manipulative. But for the guy´s frame, he´s not being manipulative. He´s just doing courtship, the only way he knows how. Girls feel manipulated because they bite the cookie of “this is a really nice harmless male friend” only to discover there was a penis under the table the whole time. Oh surprise. That evil penis. Penis only wants one thing! But really, chances are the guy is putting a lot of heart into it. Disguising as a beta is not what players do – because it doesnt work. Girls can and do… Read more »

Rollo Tomassi
Guest
Rollo Tomassi

I think all women have been around a guy who caters to them, does and says all the right things only to realize later he is a wolf in sheep’s clothing – who will turn evil the minute he doesn’t get what he wants in exchange for being “nice”. You’re not the first woman I’ve read to use this canard. I’ll tell you why this is a useful trope though; it absolves women of the responsibility of rejecting Beta men. It’s much easier on a woman’s ego to presume Beta men really harbor ulterior motives. “He’s just playing the nice… Read more »

Rollo Tomassi
Guest
Rollo Tomassi

Sometimes freedom means having nothing to lose. I don’t mean to go all fortune cookie on you, but I think the first step is letting go of caring about losing a particular individual. That’s particularly hard for most guys. As I stated in another post, it’s men who are the true romantics, and abandoning that romanticism is actually the best way to foster it. This is going to sound really Zen, but we have to allow that romance to happen, not force it. We relax into beta supplication in an LTR because we think that’s the way of ensuring a… Read more »

Neecy
Guest

@ Rollo “it absolves women of the responsibility of rejecting Beta men. It’s much easier on a woman’s ego to presume Beta men really harbor ulterior motives. “He’s just playing the nice guy so he can fuck me” is not only convenient, it’s conceited.” Actually, there are men (they may not actually be Betas) but they falsely ADOPT those Beta traits as a way to manipulate women and then turn evil when women see through him. These guys may really be OMEGAS in BETA clothing, but the reality is there are men who do use those traits to get close… Read more »

Neecy
Guest

@YOHAMI, I am not opposed to men no longer going above and beyond for women who have not shown any kind of intimate interest back. Now if he really just wants to be her friends and do things for her and has no desire for anything more, then I guess that’s fine But my philosophy is all relationships (friendly, sexual etc) need to be reciprocating. Anything less is not a friendship or relationship but someone getting used. Anyone who is doing more than their fare share and not getting anything in return is doing too much and is asking for… Read more »

detinennui32
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detinennui32

Neecy:

I suspect most men in happy, well-adjusted marriage show some alpha and some beta. No happily married man I know with knowledge of Game runs constant hardcore asshole Game on his wife. There’s a time for it, but you can’t do it all the time.

And the nice guy/evil guy Jekyll and Hyde thing is a canard, as Rollo said. Most of the “nice guys” I know act this way because of frustration.

detinennui32
Guest
detinennui32

Marellus: Fascinating question. I vote for the impetus being universal suffrage and the resulting female political power. That gave rise to all the rest of the social phenomena you listed except perhaps TV.

What will end it? I don’t see evidence of a marriage strike. There is evidence that some men who divorce never remarry. I suspect nothing short of economic collapse (and resulting civil unrest and military conflict) will change it. In hard economic times, women have greater incentive to remain with their men.

Hero
Guest
Hero

I don’t think this is necessarily a canard. “Nice guys” are often not being truthful about what they want. They are playing the “nice guy” card in hope that they will get somewhere but girls can see through it and it comes off as deceitful. The “nice guy” often then does appear as a wolf in sheep’s clothing because he becomes angry when he doesn’t get what he wants. He feels like “I’ve been so nice, how come she doesn’t like me?” He resents the girls for not responding to him being the “nice guy”. This is one of the… Read more »

Mike C
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Mike C

My thought is this meme that “nice guys are nice to manipulate women into bed” is a crystal clear example of projection. I think many women have a strong tendency to acti “nice” in order to try and manipulate some intended outcome. I SEE IT IN THE WORKPLACE ALL THE TIME. It truly is amazing to watch when one woman is “nice” to another one that you know she thinks is a complete bitch and then 30 minutes later she is telling you about that bitch that said so and so. I actually think it is much more difficult for… Read more »

Mike C
Guest
Mike C

“Nice guys” are often not being truthful about what they want. They are playing the “nice guy” card in hope that they will get somewhere but girls can see through it and it comes off as deceitful. But it isn’t about intentional deception. “Nice” guys were taught that straightforward, assertive, aggressive displays of male sexuality are a bad thing. That to either directly communicate or subcommunicate that “yes I want to fuck you” early in the interaction is the “wrong” thing to do. That you have to get to know here as “a person” first and be “friends first”. That… Read more »

Neecy
Guest

Mike you are right women are very manipulative passive/aggressive creatures and we believe men are practical and usually straightforward. So the nice guy reminds so many women of themselves (b/c) he is being nice to gain something) and so we see that a negative. The reason why the alpha guy who is straightforward gets positive reactions from women is b/c men by nature don’t usually play nice to get what they want. Ultimately you are correct in that moms and women who raise their sons this way r doing them a disservice. I had this discussion on my blog under… Read more »

Marellus
Guest
Marellus

The change might come from outside the USA. China is a male dominated society, and as Hillary Clinton said courtesy of wikileaks : “How do you dictate to your banker ?”

Have you noticed that some of the best masculine characters to be seen in popular entertainment is in Japanese anime ? I can think of L in Death Note, Lelouche in Code Geas etc ?

You have to admire them for it.

So Asia might have an effect, unless they’re also infected with a virulent strain of feminism.

Retrenched
Guest
Retrenched

The flip side of that is that if a guy is alpha enough, he can get away with pretty much anything, including actual manipulation and (sadly) even abuse, and the girl will excuse it, overlook it, or forgive him and come back for more. While if a guy can’t make a girl tingle, even his sweetest and most sincere gestures will be written off as evil manipulation. For women, the tingle trumps all. If it’s there, the guy’s wonderful, and if it’s not, he’s scum. End of story. But it’s fun sometimes to watch their little hamsters try to come… Read more »

Neecy
Guest

@ Detine I suspect most men in happy, well-adjusted marriage show some alpha and some beta. No happily married man I know with knowledge of Game runs constant hardcore asshole Game on his wife. There’s a time for it, but you can’t do it all the time. Ok this would seem normal. In fact I think it would be fun and keep the marraige interesting if the hubby every now and then used a little game and switched it up back and forth between nice guy and bad boy. As long as it is in good fun and keeps both… Read more »

johnnymilfquest
Guest

Well said.

Neecy
Guest

I just want to make one last comment on this particular topic b/c i think I may be sending the wrong message – that nice guys are bad or evil or manipulative, which is certainly not what I am intending to say. I think nice guys are well intentioned but mis-informed by society and women and unfortunatley it works against them. if it were up to me all and I had the magic wand all nice guys would be the ones getting rewarded, not the jerks. BUt….. All i am saying that women would prefer a little more straigh forwardnes… Read more »

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[…] talking about it, are going to side with the feminine imperative by default. For practitioners of Beta Game (which is to say the better part of 90% of guys) this is an organic opportunity to identify with […]

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xsplat
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As you said, and as Roosh also said, not indifference towards attraction and relationship in general, but indifference towards attraction and relationship to any particular girl.

That’s the concept that often gets tripped over.

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Quizlling Jones
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Quizlling Jones

Just as a Question, Its all well and good being ‘Alpha’ but WHAT have you got to do in order to put yourself in that Alpha mindset you decribe?

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Sunslayer
Guest
Sunslayer

I used to “poach” girls from alphas when I was a teenager. I would wait until a girl was upset with her boyfriend for being an asshole or whatever. I would just hang around and be the opposite – kind and caring or something. It worked pretty well, I was the rebound guy for a lot of girls. Never lasted that long, though.

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jose
Guest

I’m slightly confused.

Does alpha game and beta game not merge at some point once you try to build some comfort with the woman? As in you start looking for commonalities and how you and her are at least somewhat ‘alike’?

Also what do you mean by ‘not like other guy’s’? Someone who speaks his mind,is confident etc etc is also ‘not like other guy’s’.

I’m sorry it’s a little late but i just stumbled past your blog and the stuff you’ve written is absolutely great but i was just wondering about this bit

Tony
Guest
Tony

I’m so sick and tired of hearing that a person who is nice is automatically assumed to be xxx, yyy, zzz where xxx, yyy, zzz are not nice things. This does a huge disservice to people who are nice. not to mention the English language which only works if an adjective means what it means not the opposite of what it means. Anyway there are genuinely nice people out there. I also am sick and tired of hearing that women only are attracted to the un-nice. I see many couples that prove otherwise. Right? I mean it’s all very clever… Read more »

Tony
Guest
Tony

Thanks…those links are helpful…I’m seeing better now the context in which to frame these words……… will keep reading…..

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Bill Wilstein
Guest
Bill Wilstein

This stuff might work at party state colleges, but with really intelligent women who are over 25, the psychology of dating and mating is far more complex. And the process is far more complex. And relationships change over time. I view your concepts as being quite silly and adolescent.

Bill Wilstein
Guest
Bill Wilstein

Neecy wrote: “Mike you are right women are very manipulative passive/aggressive creatures and we believe men are practical and usually straightforward. So the nice guy reminds so many women of themselves (b/c) he is being nice to gain something) and so we see that a negative. The reason why the alpha guy who is straightforward gets positive reactions from women is b/c men by nature don’t usually play nice to get what they want. Ultimately you are correct in that moms and women who raise their sons this way r doing them a disservice. I had this discussion on my… Read more »

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daysofgamecom
Guest

I’d add a related concept: Hug Farming.

Hug Farming is a behavior of the beta male, where he attempts to court girls via his pro-woman/anti-alpha behavior, and get’s “ahhhhh hugs for you, Beta Boy!!!” in return, which validates him, and keeps that behavior in the environment. Classic “white knight” stuff.

Hug farming is an epidemic on the internet.

daysofgamecom
Guest

Also… in the comments there are references to “wolves in sheep’s clothing.” There are most definitely beta-like wolves running this kind of game. Maybe they are “beta-mimics?” You define the difference in the ability to close. Wolves, close… even if they start out w/ beta-game. That’s the only difference, close rate. Many wolves also have this “I’m not like the other guy” attitude, and will throw legitimate men under the bus in their efforts to beta-play girls. And I have seen some of the wolves with tremendous success (lays in the 100s… hippie layhounds, that type), as they are actually… Read more »

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Fine gentleman
Guest
Fine gentleman

This is a great article and very thought provoking. I have one question however, how do human alphas compete with other alphas? Say you are at a party and all the girls are on some, and by that I mean an otherwise repulsive person who you wouldn’t want to be your bro, douchebag- how do you compete ?

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[…] on eggshells around women is the hallmark of a Modern Man. Rest assured girls, he knows the personal repercussions women will mete out should he commit a […]

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[…] was recently asked if I thought Beta men employing Beta Game was a successful strategy in the larger scheme of things. If success means that Beta Game will get […]

Shane
Guest
Shane

It’s fake as hell to pretend to be nice and then get shitty the women doesn’t want fuck you! Beta game works if your patient.

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[…] to third world nations and pandering to Islam and Islamic terrorists.  This is masterful Beta Game–making oneself appear less dominant than one really […]

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[…] and pedestalizing Warrior Princesses is a critical component to a geek guy’s form of Beta Game. It’s ALL about identifying with the feminine and celebrating the fantasy that men and women […]

Randy C Treibel
Guest
thomasso75
Guest

“he’s a child in a man’s body with a fragile ego only interested in fucking women and moving on. He’s unlike anything on women’s collective stated list of prerequisites for an acceptable male.”

Boy, thaths exactly the story I have been told about how not to be throughout my childhood /teenage years.
This article sure resonates with me. Thanks!

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[…] effect on every woman when you overtly demonstrate your lower value to them by sticking to your Beta Game while thinking it’s some how the correct, Red Pill way of dealing with […]

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[…] actually find it. So instead they contribute to an atmosphere of fear in some lame form of Beta Game they hope will be recognized and rewarded for by workplace […]

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[…] This equalist presumption often forms the mental point of origin for most Blue Pill men. Ostensibly, this mental prioritization of some equal state between the sexes is what most Blue Pill guys will tell you attracts women. This notion is also fundamental to Blue Pill guys’ drive for identifying their own psyches with the feminine and forms the basis of Beta Game. […]

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[…] for months to get her to sexually respond to my pathetically Blue Pill “I really care” Beta Game. I vividly remember (I was 19) the night I introduced him to her and so began a literal fuck-fest […]

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[…] d.h. eine Taktik um an Frauen zu kommen. Feminisierte Männer fahren immer wieder ihr „Beta-Game“ was man auch als „White Knight Game“ bezeichnen könnte. Sie haben es so in einem […]

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[…] growing up the message was the same Blue Pill identifying with the feminine (in fact Beta Game depends on that identification). Play nice, play equal, respect all women by default and never […]

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[…] I mean, the guy wears a Time’s Up pin. But like most male feminists, he gets hung by his own Beta Game bullshit – this is the fate of all male […]

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[…] act. I mean, the guy wears a Time’s Up pin. But like most male feminists, he gets hung by his own Beta Game bullshit – this is the fate of all male […]

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[…] act. I mean, the guy wears a Time’s Up pin. But like most male feminists, he gets hung by his own Beta Game bullshit – this is the fate of all male […]

tharwolf
Guest

Trying to establish my own understanding of your post, so please correct me where wrong (and this may borrow from existing knowledge, so forgive me if some of this doesn’t have a 1:1 correlation within this post) Beta * Identifying and assimilating the feminine qualities he desires * Wholehearted acceptance of women’s stated desires * Sublimation of existing identity to comply with these stated desires * Psychological saboteur – (attempts) covert negotiation of desire * Disqualification of superior competitors via verbal manipulation: “gossip” * Ego-preservation via self-identification as “unique” Alpha * Detached understanding and acceptance of the feminine nature *… Read more »