A Man in Demand Conference – The Review


encore

On August 7th I made the announcement about the Man In Demand Seminar I’d be speaking at along with Christian McQueen, Tanner Guzy from Masculine Style and Goldmund, whom I’d done the impromptu interview with while he was passing through Reno towards the end of July.

In that blog post’s comments a bit of criticism was leveled at both Christian McQueen and myself for agreeing to speak at this conference and in that discourse I promised readers the following:

I’ll tell you what Joe, I’ll give a personal, honest and objective review of the whole conference when it’s done. I’ll make sure I’m present for all the talks (which I was going to do anyway), and I’ll watch that all the money goes where it’s suppose to go (primarily paying for the venue – it’s spendy even by my standards).

If anything is shady, if anything is off the books, if any of the men who attend want to opine about it, you’ll know and read about it here.

You see, I have always had an open forum; if you want to say you got ripped off, be the first to post it here. Unlike other forums and Disqus threads, I neither edit, censor nor ban any critical opinions. I’ll pull blatant spamming, but the integrity of TRM is based on an open exchange of ideas.

So it’s not my rep on the line, it’s everyone else living up to their own. I have confidence in each of the speakers to deliver what they will. If they don’t, I and anyone else who chooses will let you know.

I don’t do this for a living Joe. If the manosphere shut down tomorrow I’d be making the same scratch I do now.

So here now is my honest and objective assessment of the entire conference.

Before I get into the breakdown of the entire weekend I want to first address that not one speaker at this event made money from it. I wont speak for the guys, but I know how much I spent on a flight, my three days accommodations, my transportation (not cheap in Vegas) while there, my food expenses, my drinks, etc. All this far exceeded the marginal profit (about $330) we each made from our appearances once the venue, insurance and security was paid for.

Christian provided all of us with the financials every step of the way up to and after the event sold out inside of 19 days after we announced it. Christian promptly paid us after the event sold out, a full 3 weeks beforehand. Each admission was $46. Divide that by 4 and each man there payed a mere $11.50 per speaker.

This was Vegas. The venue was everything (and more) than I expected. We wanted it to be affordable since travel and accommodations don’t come cheap. Beyond the basic admission we had a limited 4-person VIP dinner at Sinatra in Wynn’s Encore Casino Resort with the 4 of us for a bargain $98.

That said, everything was above board with Christian, all the speakers and every man who attended.

I put a bit of money out to make this happen, and for me it wasn’t anything concerning, but I know it was a stretch for some of the speakers as well as some of the attendees. I’ve always viewed money as currency. Not in the formal sense that money’s a currency (duh), but rather how money is like a current – as electricity is a current – and an energy with which I can do things.

This event was something I wanted to do. That’s not me trying to be magnanimous, it’s just how I approach things I think are worthwhile. And this seminar was most definitely worth my investment.

The Trip

Here’s a Vegas tip if you’ve never been; practically no one rents a car if you’re flying in. If you get a good one, stay with the same driver. The company I work with usually has me set up, but on this trip I got two good taxi drivers, Allan and his brother Jairo. Get their cell numbers and stay with that guy while you’re out. They appreciate it, and you get info on where cool shit is happening.

I wont bore you with the flight or my first night in town, but suffice to say the room was comfortable as to be expected and conveniently located where I needed to be. My evening was spent reviewing my talk and writing out points on flash cards. I treated myself to a couple of IPAs at the hotel bar and met a very hot bartender named Candace. She was 26 and we promptly got into conversation about her LTR ex-boyfriend, her son and where she was on the Preventive Medicine timeline. I mention her here because I gave her a copy of both my books and she seemed fascinated by them.

The Talk

Jairo dropped me off at our venue at around 8:45 Saturday morning. I was pleased to see the security guard we’d paid for was right in front on the street and immediately directed me to the conference room where I was greeted by Christian and our stunning events hostess (easily an HB 8.5 brunette). I then meet up with Goldmund and Tanner and settled in for the start.

The room was pretty hot at first (air conditioning problems), but our hostess resolved it before Goldmund had got halfway through his talk. I had a few men kind of tentatively look me up and down when I got into the room as if maybe they were wondering if it was me. This was my first public appearance so it was a bit strange for me as well. I was oddly more nervous when I first got into the venue and began having men ask me if I was Rollo Tomassi than when I started my actual talk 5 hours later.

Goldmund

As promised I took a seat in the back of the room and did my due diligence by taking notes on each speaker. Goldmund was first and in all honesty he built his talk up much more than I’d expected. What I knew was that he’d give a recounting of his trans-American trek he did this summer. What surprised me was how in depth he went about how getting out on the road both frees and educates a man about himself.

Nothing causes a man to learn more about himself and teaches self-reliance than putting yourself out in the open with only your wit and perseverance to sustain you. Goldmund’s talk was more than just an adventure guide and some video about the women he met and banged along the way. He made an effort to grow from it, not to mention meet and interact with many manosphere personalities along the way.

I was very impressed with his insights about his trip, but also that he made it accessible for the men who were present, many of whom (myself included) were 10-20 years his senior.

Tanner Guzy

I’ll confess, I wasn’t aware of Tanner and his Masculine Style blog until Christian had mentioned his name as a possible speaker for this conference. I looked him, and at first I thought, well he’s a ‘style guy’ – I was wrong. Both on his site and during his talk Tanner brings not just style advice for men, but presents it in such a succinctly Red Pill way I was forced to rethink a few of my own TRM principles about bearing, physical presence and appearance.

I daresay I learned the most from Tanner of all these talks. Granted, Tanner is a professional style consultant and works directly in men’s fashion, but he doesn’t simply suggest men wear this or that; Tanner explains why men should dress to be impressive and why men should care about their appearances.

It’s easy to quote the 48 Laws of Power about dressing the part to have others consider your status, but it’s important to grasp the Red Pill dynamics that go along with demonstrating our strengths, our status, our accomplishments and why what we wear indicates this.

I should add that during Tanner’s Q&A session (easily as long as my own went) I felt compelled to make the point that guys who hate on other men for being concerned with what they wear was in fact a form of intrasexual combat. Tanner had an example of some of his forum haters telling him “only fags worry about their clothes” and “real men don’t think about fashion”; essentially ‘just be yourself’, be manly, wear jeans and a t-shirt and it’s all good. I made the comment that this type of SMV disqualification is comparable to fat girls telling slightly less fat girls they look OK being fat on FaceBook to hold them in place and hinder any ideas of attempting to improve their SMV.

Christian

Christian’s talk, rather speech, surprised me most. I don’t think I was alone in expecting the Playboy game talk in some manner would be forthcoming from Christian, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. He was well prepared with a speech, he primarily read, and had obviously given a great amount of consideration to.

He began with suicide and divorce statistics and wove these facts into what I can only describe as a call to arms for men in reclaiming their masculinity. If he’d left it there it would’ve made an emotional impact enough (his voice choking with emotion during some moments), but the import of his speech was also about men defining masculinity for themselves in a feminine-centric culture that aligns itself against them from ever unplugging from it.

I’ve come to expect the happy-go-lucky Game proponent with the Rat Pack swagger to be larger than life from my 2 interviews, but Christian dropped that persona for this speech and it made his point for him. Goldmund described it as inspirational and motivational, and I’m thankful for Christian for being that at this event – it’s what was needed to round out the line up.

I should add that my good friend Sam Botta took it upon himself not only to fly out from L.A., but he also brought his MacBook Pro and some pro audio equipment to record me. He warmed up by doing a test run on Christian’s speech and while I don’t know when it’ll be available I think the recording will speak volumes about Christian’s actual maturity and the seriousness he’s capable of. It will surprise many of his critics.

Rollo Tomassi

Well shit, what can I say about myself that wont sound like I’m glossing myself? As I mentioned I was very nervous when I first got to the event in the morning and had men I’d only just met ask me to sign their books and let me know how grateful they were for my work. After a while I felt like I was more among a group of old friends than guys I needed to impress and that nervousness turned into a comfort kind of like speaking to a family gathering.

I’m sure that sounds all touchy-feely, but I don’t know how else to describe it. In between speakers I had men come to me, ask me questions, show me appreciation, tell me their stories about their lives and so on, so it put much more at ease. As the talks went on I saw that there were men attending who were obviously my senior – I’d guess late 50s maybe early 60s – as well as young men in their 20s, and this also put me into a family frame of mind.

I understand that my presence was a big draw for this conference. I’m humbled by that, especially when I have men in the military, men and their sons, men on the Vegas police force and men who’ve seen decades more of a feminine-centric society than I express their gratitude for my writing and ideas.

Still, going last has it’s disadvantages, not the least of which was that I’d taken notes of all the speakers’ talks ahead of mine. My head gets filled with things I think need to be expanded on, areas I thought should be explained better, and this then leads to my mentally rewriting my own talk and trying to jot down things I now want to cover too. I had to make a conscious effort to repress this, but I’m afraid some of it found its way into my talk.

As you might guess, I talked about what I know best and this is the influences of Hypergamy on women, men, society, etc. I didn’t mention it, but I had titled my talk Hypergamy – Micro to Macro the night before and this was my basic outline. I began by defining terms because I didn’t want to presume every guy in the audience was entirely familiar with my interpretations of what Red Pill, Alpha/Beta and Hypergamy mean in my referencing. This turned out better than I thought because it sparked a lot of ideas and later discussions while I was in-speech.

For a while I entertained the idea of simply making my speech an hour long Q&A session since so many men had hit me up with such great questions between talks and I really wanted to go into more detail. Instead I opted for sticking to building up Hypergamy from its evolutionary psychology and biological roots in ovulatory shift behaviors, through the personal and sociological implication. After this I held a Q&A and this really developed into the group discussion I’d hoped it would. So in the end I got a happy compromise and I hope I got to all the questions every man had.

Overview

As I said, Sam Botta was my hero for recording the audio of this. He told me I went on for 133 minutes and I can tell you it seemed to blow by so much faster. I will make that audio available for a reasonably purchasable download once Sam has it mastered in order to be fair with those who attended.

It was an honor to meet so many diverse men who’d also made an effort to make this event worthwhile. And while none of us made money from this I think every man there profited from the experience. I met a father and son, I had lunch with my commenter Rugby, I met commenter Jeremy, a Vegas police detective, a former Marine pilot who told me he would be insisting his sons read my books before they graduated high school, and so many more who I don’t have the space to mention here. Thank you for oming to this.

There were no “leaks” of where the venue was to be held. There were no publicity stunts or pandering to contrived social agendas. There were no bomb threats or feminist protests, and, as promised, no video or photography of our guests. I’m proud to say that this conference was well designed and well executed in a luxurious location with every effort made to ensure the anonymity of the men attending and all with the intent of helping each of us collectively learn and grow in a Red Pill awareness.

The VIP after-dinner at Sinatra was fantastic and some of the best camaraderie I’ve had with men I’d only met in person a few hours prior. The women at Encore were top shelf and the martinis were too.

I should also mention that at Encore I was ‘coined’ by one of our Air Force guests who was stationed in South Korea and was in Vegas for the event. Up until this time I was unaware of the significance of receiving an Air Force coin, but it was the highlight and honor of my weekend.

coin

Things We Could Do Better

Finally, at the end of the seminar we had a group Q&A and bluntly asked everyone what we could do to make a (possible) annual event better. Among these comments were a meet & greet or a group lunch which I thought would be good, but also I’d like to open up the VIP into a larger collective gathering in the evening.

My thoughts would be a larger venue, and of course a longer time frame for registration. Maybe a 2 day event over a long weekend with 6 or so speakers would be ideal.

So with that I want to thank all those who attended one last time here. A Man in Demand was as it should be, a collective experience and a collective discussion and that requires all of us being present and relating.

Goldumnd has a great write up of the event here, and Christian gives his thoughts here too. Also, Tanner had a funny video of his trip to the event here.

If you attended or you have and ideas or comments about this being an annual gathering you’d like to see please let me know in the comment thread. If I missed you or you were one of the guys I met or mentioned in this review please let me know.

Thanks gentlemen.

About Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine View all posts by Rollo Tomassi

385 responses to “A Man in Demand Conference – The Review

  • rugby11ljh

    “but it’s important to grasp the Red Pill dynamics that go along with demonstrating our strengths, our status, our accomplishments and why what we wear indicates this.”

    That’s was a huge part of his influence.

    Goldmans a badass to the core

    Christian is the one who taught me how play is hugely important even if you have to Perform you may as well laugh With yourself.

  • JHypers

    Being able to purchase the full audio of all the talks would be well worth the price in my opinion. I don’t think video would be inherently necessary, but if it’s considered, doing something along the lines of the 21 Convention (minus the ad-plastered YouTube channel) where people pay a subscription fee to stream the video for a limited time seems reasonable.

  • play don't pay

    @ Rollo as I couldn’t attend ( based in uk) and as you had a Q&A session.
    I would like to take the opportunity to ask your and any of the commenters on here opinions on a subject where my stance seems to be different to most guys on the manosphere.

    It regards paying for everything during dates, most of the sphere has this tagged as beta behaviour ( you’re displaying low SMV ) suggesting you’re so grateful and needy for her company that you are prepared to pay for it.

    I however somewhat disagree, I mainly see women as a form of entertainment these days, and I believe that if done from a strong frame and with a don’t give a Fuck about the money attitude ( because the level of spend is not going to affect my finances) then I believe if done in the right way with confidence and charm it can actually be DHV.

    It’s important to note a few things here.
    1.) I control the date/ activities and venues at most I will allow a girl to suggest a bar if we’re hopping between bars and I happen to like that bar anyways.
    2.) I will never buy a drink for a date that she won’t buy for herself, if she’s vodka and coke when she’s paying but champagne and cocktails when it’s on me she’s out.
    3.) If she earns more than me then she’s on her own ( rarely happens).

    I have read about guys saying they never pay on dates or even that the women pay and they see this as being proof of being AF and not BB and there is some merit in this to a point.
    What I’m saying is that paying for dates is not necessarily beta behaviour per se, if it’s done by choice not necessity and with a strong frame / I don’t give a Fuck attitude because you can genuinely afford the spend then surely that’s the best play out there?
    The Alpha takes care of his pack no?

    Any thoughts?

  • lh

    While Rollo is making good points about masculine style and it’s importance, I still doubt a man would want to look as if style was all that matters in his life. Of all the possible missions a man could choose style seems inappropriate. Of course that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care about style at all, of course not. But I think it should appear effortless, which gives it a certain elegance.
    The “Hipsters” don’t seem to get the lays as far as I can tell.

  • Andy

    Of all the possible missions a man could choose style seems inappropriate.

    IMO a woman isn’t going to look at it like that. If you can effortlessly pull off looking ten times better than every other guy – it’s going to set you apart. You’re basically AMOG’ing everyone else simply by walking through the door. You’ll be guy that all the women are looking at/wondering about. Also the guy the other guys want to disqualify.

  • Mercoledì Links | Il Risorgimento

    […] Rollo’s observations on the “A Man in Demand” conference […]

  • Rollo Tomassi

    @lh, Tannerwas very specific about exactly your point. A man needs to own his style, not have his style own him.

  • longgone

    play don’t pay,

    I’m with you on this 100%, and in discussions on this site, was surprised to have paying for dates described as beta. (new to the ‘sphere) Your point #2 is a valuable refinement and I will put it into practice. Thanks

  • Badpainter

    One thing concerns me:

    “I treated myself to a couple of IPAs…”

    I assume that was an affirmative choice, but why?

  • Rollo Tomassi

    Going halves on a date is a shit test of your burden of performance brought to you by Equalist propaganda.

    Dating is as simple as it’s always been: have a plan and the boldness and resources to execute it. Presume the sale and bring her into your Frame. Expect her to pay half and you abdicate Frame.

  • SJF

    Thank you Rollo for your selfless help for other men.

    I have the idea that meet-ups in real life are an underutilized resource for red pill aware manosphere enthusiasts. There seems to be a well-deserved reverence for the opportunity to talk to like minded individuals about masculine self-improvement.

    I tremendously enjoyed the opportunity to hang out on several occasions in a virtual way with other guys on Sun Wukong’s rountable online discussions.

    I discovered a friend in real life four years ago with like minded interests separate from the manosphere and for the last 2 1/2 years then discovered his mastery and enthusiasm for the manosphere and red pill/game discussions. He became a valuable mentor and friend and I have the privilege of meeting up with him regularly.

    I don’t share the worry about being know as a red pill devotee and being discovered or doxxed in real life. I understand the concerns of those in public jobs and in prominent online businesses to not have it affect those jobs or businesses.

    The manosphere is still small-in-numbers in terms of how many men it reaches and how many men are interested, think they need the resource or are enthusiasts for valuable masculine self improvement resources. Finding other red pill aware/game skilled men in real life can be as difficult as finding a needle in a haystack.

    Rollo would be the first to acknowledge that the future of red pill is a bottoms-up approach. First with individuals making themselves better and then affecting others in their circle, their communities and then on to a larger scale to empower other men who are like-minded and enthusiastic.

    Five years ago I reached out in a Sportsman’s forum (fishing, hunting, wildlife and outdoor topics as well as general and political forums) to other guys in real life. Most forums have a personal message system to communicate privately with individuals for meetups. I’m sure So Suave and Roosh’s forums had similar resources, but those forums could never garner my interest for long. The outgrowth of my efforts to reach out to other like minded individuals in wildlife and deer hunting habitat resulted in a group of
    5-7 really good friends across my state and some very nearby. And then a group of 15 acquaintances that were also great guys, all of who were like-minded. There is no greater resource for men than like-minded individuals working selflessly for their group. The Way of Men is the way of the gang.

    In the past three months I have been communicating with several other commenters here that had offered up their emails in a safe public fashion.
    The amount of value that I have derived from this virtual (round-table fashion also) communication has been incalculable for me. They call me out on my faults and lead by example. Call me a red pill/game enthusiast among other things. I am a new better man with Rollo Tomassi’s definition of Real Power.

    So, I think the time has come for venues to facilitate a bottoms-up grass-roots effort to help individuals with masculine self improvement and further an individual’s pursuit of enlightened self-interest IRL (in real life).

    Any thoughts?

  • Andy

    So, I think the time has come for venues to facilitate a bottoms-up grass-roots effort to help individuals with masculine self improvement and further an individual’s pursuit of enlightened self-interest IRL (in real life).

    Have you had any luck with converting any blue pill men yourself? I have been toying with the idea of starting a “Positive Masculinity” adult ed community service class in my town. I’m a bit hesitant just because I gave The Rational Male book to my brother and his reaction was “Meh.”

    Do you think that the Red Pill is something that needs to be sought rather than evangelized?

  • SJF

    “Have you had any luck with converting any blue pill men yourself?”

    Haven’t given a thought to trying and I’m not interested in blue pill men unless they ask for help and truly mean it.

    “Do you think that the Red Pill is something that needs to be sought rather than evangelized?”

    Absolutely.

  • Naproxen

    Rollo, Play:

    I’ve always held that going Dutch (splitting the check) disqualifies the meeting as a date. I’ll always pay for the first date, regardless of if I think it went well.

    I don’t mind switching off. After paying for the first two or three, they’ll start insisting they “get this one”. Once they do that, I find I end up paying roughly 60-70% of future dates. There’s one thing though that I do look for. If she doesn’t reach for her purse and assumes I’m paying for the first date simply because I’m a man, it’s a huge red flag to me. Living in DC, I’ve only had this happen once.

    When stating that “I don’t split checks”, I can’t tell you how many women have immediately exclaimed how big a turn off it was for their previous dates to allow them to split the check.

  • SJF

    Andy, keep in mind that one of the ways a man’s brain can change through neuro-plasticity and get out of deep ingrained ruts is through true desire. (Ref: Marc Lewis “The Biology of Desire”).

  • BigAl

    When is the next one?!

    Would you consider a different location (i.e. Louisiana casinos) or do you want to stick with Vegas?

  • Andy

    “Do you think that the Red Pill is something that needs to be sought rather than evangelized?”

    Absolutely.

    How about a certain level of intelligence? It’s hard not to notice the men here seem to be intellectually curious, and smart. Maybe the reality is that we ARE the 20% and that’s all there will be.

  • Jeremy

    I didn’t want to say it first, but yeah, I felt Tanner had the best presentation at the conference. Frankly that surprised me at the time, but when I thought about it, it made sense since his entire presentation was about presenting yourself. More than anyone I’ve seen, Tanner has a knack for making something that blue-pill thinking has tried long and hard to convince men was “gay” (i.e., male style) appropriately sound like something that is essential for your own masculinity. He did this with the perfect touch of not taking himself or his business too seriously as at one point in his presentation he openly stated, “I do not think any of you should take this stuff as seriously as I do. This is my job, not yours.”

    @lh

    I still doubt a man would want to look as if style was all that matters in his life. Of all the possible missions a man could choose style seems inappropriate. Of course that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care about style at all, of course not. But I think it should appear effortless, which gives it a certain elegance.

    This exact topic came up in Tanner’s discussion period. In fact one of Tanners slides was the “barbie couple.” If you haven’t seen them, prepare your dosage of eye bleach for today…

    Yes, those are real people, not dolls. And yes, that man is so obsessed with his own appearance, it is all that matters in his life.

    In response to Tanners presentation, a guy directly in front of me asked, “I just want something I can easily throw on each day and not worry about it.” Tanner jumped in and answered before I could. The response there is that having style does take effort at first. It takes significant amounts of thought at first. It can take a day or two of going through ones closet and examining articles of clothing honestly and throwing them out. It can take literally fashion-showing your own wardrobe to yourself or someone else to assess what you have and then re-build on it. It takes time to actually look at yourself in a mirror each day. This sort of thing does not feel like a “male” activity. I would argue that it’s not.

    The effort spent on this is its own reward in the long run. The fact is that the daily effort to “have style” gets easier and easier the more frequently you examine your own appearance. Also, as men we shouldn’t get hung up on the idea that a suit and tie is the only thing that makes us look masculine. You can still look amazing in a t-shirt and jeans, but your clothes should fit you perfectly, fit the environment you chose to wear them in appropriately, and generally be clean. Eventually it does get to the point where you don’t have to think about style much because you’ve already spent the time to eliminate shit from your closet that is just bad, you’ve spent the time in the mirror recognizing what combinations look stupid, etc… Eventually it does get quite effortless, though it is never as effortless as an old polo shirt and jeans every day.

    And Rollo, apparently I was *waay* off in understanding your main thrust. I’ll blame myself mostly since I often feel from reading your blog like I know it all w.r.t. hypergamy.

  • Forge the Sky

    @lh

    A man’s clothing should as though he chose them with taste, donned them with care, and then forgot about them.

    @Andy

    When I dress distinctively, men will openly mock me to the girls they’re with. Then the girl will keep looking at me. Ha, being a target of thinly-veiled insecurity posing as an AMOG is a great DHV.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    Do you think that the Red Pill is something that needs to be sought rather than evangelized?

    Definitely…and the community needs to be there when a man seeks it out.It must be genuine and intellectually cogent to him rather than pandering to him with dramatics that only serve the egos of singular personalities.

  • Andy

    Definitely…and the community needs to be there when a man seeks it out.

    Hard to watch your good looking and successful brother marry a fatty.

  • peregrinejohn

    When the event was announced, I knew I wouldn’t be able to go, and sincerely regretted it. My hope then and now is that there will be another, preferably with timing that works with mine. By all reports, it’s everything we hoped it would be.

    Andy, I’m finding (as did SJF) that there are quite a few men out there who are looking for this, having seen serious glitches in the Matrix, but who haven’t come across it yet. Even if it’s only the 20% you suggest who are able to manage the truth, I believe that most of the 20% are still looking. And don’t forget that more are made daily. We just need to keep our eye out for those who are looking.

  • play don't pay

    I’m fully aware that my “play don’t pay” tag is incongruent with my question lol.
    I refuse to “pay” in regard to divorce rape, and alimony.
    However I do pay for my boys private school and about 4 joint holidays/ year.

    I think my average spend on a date is around $180 and considering 50% of that is spent on me, my take is that if the $90 spent on my date is an issue, then I need to address other areas of my life so that it becomes a non issue.

    @ Rollo I agree with your analysis with regards to the burden of performance. Nothing new there though.

  • lh

    @Rollo: Good. I looked at his side a few weeks ago and found a some pictures “over the top” or too “Hipsteresk” for my taste. But the idea to put mind in it is sound. I changed some furniture in my living room after reading the site.

    @Andy: Converting BP men is a big task. From my experience the more actual experience with women, the easier they understand. I got some limited success with my BP friends and family though. It took months of coming back to it. In case of one incel friend it helped to seduce his “dream-girl” of 20 years in front of his eyes to make him believe. I really want so save him.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    “Have you had any luck with converting any blue pill men yourself?”

    Yes, but only when they are at a point where they’re open to what I relate to them. There’s another aspect to the Red Pill Lens’ sensitivity and that’s being able to discern when a guy is ready to become aware of Red Pill truths.

    You’ll hear him relate commonalities of Blue Pill frustration and sometimes you’ll hear a Blue Pill man relate some Red Pill truth he’s come to on his own. That’s when you’ll know he’s open to what you have to tell him.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    @Naproxen, once again demonstrate, never explicate. If you or she discuss the terms of your “date” you are now negotiating her desire.

    Demonstrate that she is a guest in your own Frame. Show her she is ‘special’ by giving her the gift of your attention and allowing her time in your reality.

    Too many men fall into the egalitarian trap that’s been set for Betas in thinking intersexual relations are ever a meeting of independent equals. Even the most militant feminist loves to enter a powerful man’s world. His association and intimate consideration of her will always make her giddy. Women like to be taken care of by a dominant man who’s in control of his environment and is aware of his control over it.

    Yes, there’s an element of risk for Beta men becoming a free meal ticket for women, but the Prince, the Alpha, grants time (his most valuable resource) with women whom he thinks are worthy of his attentions.

    This is the impression she should have being demonstrated for her. If she doesn’t reciprocate with intimate appreciation or reciprocation then the Prince moves on to new subjects more worthy of his very valuable time.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    @BigAl, no discussions yet, but the idea of possibly doing one in Vegas and another on the east coast annually has come up.

  • CrabRangoon

    @Rollo

    Congrats on a successful seminar! I could not attend but fully intend on going to future events like this. It’s awesome you guys all got up there and really reached out to our fellow men. I’m glad to see this all picking up more and more steam over the past couple years. Keep doing what you’re doing!

  • Andy

    Andy, I’m finding (as did SJF) that there are quite a few men out there who are looking for this, having seen serious glitches in the Matrix, but who haven’t come across it yet.

    Definitely…and the community needs to be there when a man seeks it out.

    Do you think it’s possible to reach them in real life? I would love to start some sort of local fraternity or something… Partly to help people. Partly because it’s lonely walking amongst the sheep all day. Online only does so much for you.

  • fleezer

    “Of all the possible missions a man could choose style seems inappropriate”

    fashion is for women, gay men and insecure celebrities. peacocking was a flash trend in a small minority of urban locales that was dead as soon as it had a name.

    look at photos of your grandfathers. clothing was functional. the only thing that mattered was that it lasted. one troy ounce of gold for one tailored suit of clothes.

    remember back to when you were a boy. boys could not care less about clothes. we get dirty, come home grass-stained, put holes in the knees, wear the same shirt five days in a row. summers meant no shirts and no shoes. we only covered up the bare minimum required by our mothers. this is how we are.

    my three year old niece on the other hand changes outfits three times a day and looks at herself in the mirror every chance she gets. this is how women are. their survival is based almost entirely on their looks. our survival and reproductive success have almost nothing to do with our looks.

    guys begin to care about style only because they think it will attract women. this is very beta (and pushed by an advertising/gay controlled media). when guys are together with no women around what happens? clothing reverts to its true level for us: function. publicly traded companies employing overseas slave labor can’t profit off guys in their natural state as we wear underwear until it falls apart and prefer to spend our days shirtless.

    when the most powerful men in the world gather at bohemian grove they take much pleasure in the fact that they can wear shorts and t-shirts and piss on trees outdoors as even they are not free to do what they want all the time and have to play the part like a dancing monkey in order to receive their treats (beluga caviar and old burgundy are nice but not essential to a man’s true well-being and even they have to pay for sex with young women)

    kevin hart (stand up/actor) mentioned how he’s the fool who blows all his money on clothing and never once has a single person commented on his very expensive wardrobe. he also laughed at the fact that will farrell wears t-shirts he gets for free in party gift bags.

    on a very base level women may recognize a provider beta based on his willingness to wear a preapproved costume. women who say they like a man in uniform (military wives, cop wives, etc) always end up cheating on them. doing what you’re told, especially in regards to something as simple and insignificant as getting dressed, signals your willingness to follow orders (from her).

    if certain clothing makes you feel confident, great. wear what you want but make sure you’re doing it for you and no one else.

  • Vitriol

    @play don’t pay
    “…most of the sphere has this tagged as beta behaviour ( you’re displaying low SMV ) suggesting you’re so grateful and needy for her company that you are prepared to pay for it.
    I however somewhat disagree, I mainly see women as a form of entertainment these days, and I believe that if done from a strong frame and with a don’t give a Fuck about the money attitude ( because the level of spend is not going to affect my finances) then I believe if done in the right way with confidence and charm it can actually be DHV.”

    You’re ahead of the game if you’ve already reached the conclusion that women should only be used for entertainment and sexual purposes. I firmly believe that men who are still trying to learn game techniques in order to get serious with girls (whether for LTRs, marriages, living together) in 2015 are going to get burned badly at some point in the future. The smartphone era has given women who are attractive enough for us to pursue way too many options, with easy access to as many men as they need.

    Don’t worry if some guy selling PUA books thinks your actions are a “DLV” instead of a “DHV” or some other nonsense. These guys who are making money off of the game/PUA stuff want to make the process as inefficient as possible so you need to buy their books, read their blogs, test out material in real life interactions, etc. However, the biggest secret they all want to hide is that using money, whether doing something like you described or paying for pussy outright, is the most efficient way to get laid. If your main goal is to get laid as much as possible, does it matter whether you followed some arbitrary rules that some guy posted on the internet along the way? Using money is actually the best way to get a good ROI on your time as opposed to earning it on their terms and not spending anything but wasting much more time along the way.

  • Jeremy

    @fleezer

    There’s a difference between style and fashion, and it makes all the difference in your comment.

    style: a distinctive appearance, typically determined by the principles according to which something is designed.
    fashion: a popular trend, especially in styles of dress and ornament or manners of behavior

    As a man you should have a style, while mostly ignoring fashion.

  • The Diplomat

    @Rollo

    Thanks for the excellent post-game breakdown of the event. I very strongly considered going–just to meet you face-to-face and personally thank you for everything you’ve done. I don’t indulge many regrets in my life, but missing out on this one almost qualifies.

  • Vitriol

    @fleezer
    “on a very base level women may recognize a provider beta based on his willingness to wear a preapproved costume. women who say they like a man in uniform (military wives, cop wives, etc) always end up cheating on them. doing what you’re told, especially in regards to something as simple and insignificant as getting dressed, signals your willingness to follow orders (from her).”

    This is a very important point. The men who women seek out for relationships are men who can be controlled. The guys I know who aren’t very strong willed or bold are usually the ones who are constantly in and out of monogamous LTRs because they can be molded into what she wants. I would never want to live like that, and the guys I know who are similar to me in that regard (strong-willed, rebellious, subversive personality and usually more successful because of those traits) couldn’t care less about relationships and getting married.

  • The Diplomat

    @fleezer

    To quote Frank Zappa (who was sitting on a political discussion panel when he said it), “Don’t kid yourselves. Everyone here is wearing a uniform.” Jeremy succinctly points out the critical difference. Style definitely matters.

    The medium IS the message–which applies across the board.

  • The Diplomat

    @fleezer
    P.S. And apparently (after a quick internet search reveals), Zappa had originally said it to a roomful of hippies at an earlier date, but a good truth bears repetition. The fact that he later repeated it to a bunch of stuffy old white men displays his strong frame and the universality of his message.

    “Everybody in this room is wearing a uniform. Don’t kid yourself.” – Frank Zappa to a bunch of (apparently?) British hippies on “Burnt Weeny Sandwich” some time before or during 1970.

  • Forge the Sky

    @play don’t pay

    Frame is everything. If you’re teaching people not to have a supplicative frame, it can be useful to make them avoid things that could seem like ‘serving,’ like paying for a date. Too many men will land themselves on a lot of useless dates that way, where the girl gets a free dinner and dispenses thanks and a hug.

    Once you have the correct, self-oriented frame, you realize it’s all about context.

  • lh

    @play don’t pay:

    Being anxious about doing everything right is very bad. So don’t take this point too serious.

    But basically:

    if she has to make a sacrifice for you => your value increases
    if you make a sacrifice for her => your value decreases

    That is how her emotional perception will be. Her rationalization will differ of course.

  • fleezer

    “style: a distinctive appearance, typically determined by the principles according to which something is designed.”

    thanks for the clarification, Jeremy.

    men are designed by their genes. a man’s style (distinctive appearance) is literally just the man then, or the man plus his costume, or the man plus his costume plus his haircut, or the man plus his costume plus his haircut plus his jewelry? so a naked, unshaven, unclipped man (even ingomar the barbarian wore a costume and ended up enslaved by a woman) is the purest expression of style and anything beyond that is fashion to a degree?

    I feel most like a man when I’m wearing no costume and pounding away, be it on a woman or a project (making chili feels better when one is shirtless and even to this day a man can wear only underwear in a coed hot yoga class without any problem). is unbranded underwear a costume? a uniform?

    young women in their prime teen years choose to fuck guys with no fashion sense (wearing whatever mom washed or doesn’t smell too badly) and an appearance so slightly different from their peers that to the casual observer it might as well not exist.

    why does a teen in her prime pick one guy in a hoodie and jeans over another in a hoodie and jeans? his style (height, gait, jawline, scent, voice)? why is it the first thing she wants to do is get him out of his costume and on top of her? why does she want to wear his clothes no matter what they are (beat up hoodie, t-shirt)? she wants to mark herself as his property and aside from getting pregnant by him wearing his costume is the best option?

    clothing, jewelry, tattoos – all ancient and predating civilization. they must mean something

  • Jeremy

    Ah, that was one of the other times my jaw dropped to the floor at the conference. Tanner had a slide in his presentation that was his personal picture. It was a picture of a bunch of punk rockers rocking it out in a room in a house, they all had obscenely spiked and dyed hair, and were wearing exactly what you’d expect such guys to wear. Most of the guys in the picture had their back turned to the camera as a result of their activity at the time. It turns out, Tanner himself was one of the guys in that photograph.

  • Forge the Sky

    @SJF

    “So, I think the time has come for venues to facilitate a bottoms-up grass-roots effort to help individuals with masculine self improvement and further an individual’s pursuit of enlightened self-interest IRL (in real life).
    Any thoughts?”

    Hard to say how possible this is without knowing how many men are redpill. But heck, if there’s many within spitting distance of Lansing maybe we could stir something up😉

    Re: converting men to redpill. I agree that probably only a minority of men are capable. And it takes some sort of trauma, or extensive experience with women. Direct proselytizing isn’t likely to work; they need to come to you in some fashion.

    I’ve heard of people putting up posters in public restrooms saying things like, “Is a woman cheating on you and you don’t know why?” or “Have you been called a misandrist for no reason?” with a manosphere url at the bottom. Tacky, but I suppose that’s how a shotgun approach works.

  • The Diplomat

    A little O/T for this thread, but on-topic for TRM in general.

    I hadn’t intended it, but I got to thinking about how RP as fuck Zappa always was. A conservative libertarian free thinker who walked his talk. Watch him hold frame and own the room. His most vocal opponent here uses every FI tactic in the book, from shaming, questioning his manhood, and resorting to purely irrational/emotional argumentation. Watch Zappa’s body language, facial expressions, frame control, and amused mastery in action. It’s a great textbook demonstration of solid RP behavior and DHV in action.

    Instructive.

  • lh

    “guys begin to care about style only because they think it will attract women. this is very beta (and pushed by an advertising/gay controlled media).”

    That’s too harsh. There is a reason narcissism as part of the dark triad is such a thing. The end of your comment has the point: Wear it because you are so great and maybe even in love with yourself.

    Another important point for masculine style is how you wear it after it was chosen: It should look like you forgot about it.

  • lh

    Whenever you “put mind into something” this “energy of mind” will create an attraction for that thing. That’s what art is all about. Human minds are attracted by such “pieces of mind”. That’s also true for behavior and of course clothing or style too.

    Today I chose some simple black t-shirt which I happen to like because of how it falls. Dr. Borderline complimented me later in the day for “the look of my old t-shirts on me”. And I don’t even think it was manipulation – at least not on her part.

  • Jeremy

    @fleezer

    men are designed by their genes. a man’s style (distinctive appearance) is literally just the man then, or the man plus his costume, or the man plus his costume plus his haircut, or the man plus his costume plus his haircut plus his jewelry? so a naked, unshaven, unclipped man (even ingomar the barbarian wore a costume and ended up enslaved by a woman) is the purest expression of style and anything beyond that is fashion to a degree?

    There is some conflation there. Men are perhaps “designed by” genes, but the definition I used doesn’t specify the method by which men are designed, it specifies the design itself. The design of men is a utilitarian one, hence the presentation of a man should reflect some utility. That is not a “costume” as much as it is an accurate representation of the function.

    Nudity presents nothing, it actually denotes the absence of either form or function, it is more of a blank slate. Whatever clothing you take on, whatever style you adopt should reflect the man you are. Make sure that you are presenting the man you are in the best possible way. If you’re a banker, you probably want to not be caught wearing anything other than a damn fine suit at work. If you’re an oil-drill-worker, you probably don’t want to be caught without significant gear on you, so make sure it presents what you are as best it can. That doesn’t mean the oil-worker jumpsuit should be 100% clean all the time, but it does mean it shouldn’t look like it’s 50 years old and hanging on by a thread. Male endeavors are vastly varied, and the style you adopt should reflect your own endeavors in this way.

    Don’t think of going for a “Style” as adopting a “costume”, think of it as trying to present yourself in the best possible way. That’s the opposite of costuming, as when you’re wearing a costume you’re trying to make yourself look like something you’re not.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    That’s the difference between clothes wearing you and you wearing the clothes.

  • Jeremy

    @The Diplomat

    Great example. I had seen that video before. Frank owns the entire show. Their topic on “obscene speech” literally comes across as a waste of time with cackling hens and he puts those blue-pill conservatives in their place quite easily. I actually tend to recite what he says in that episode in my head when I’m confronted with people being offended by words.

    “They’re just words, we’re talking about words.”

  • DandyDude

    @fleezer
    The link Rollo posted explains a lot, but to make it clearer, look to the likes of Louis IV of France and other powerful men in the history of mankind: you’ll see that back in the day it was men that cared more about clothes and their appearance, for the simple fact that clothes show your status in the community. The current state of affairs, where clothing, fashion and caring about your appearance are considered feminine things, is a by-product of the first Industrial Revolution, what John Carl Flugel named “the great masculine renunciation” (The Spirit of Clothes, 1930).

  • Rollo Tomassi

    I wish I had the shot handy, but Tanner had a great picture of a military general in full dress uniform with medals, epaulets, and full regalia.

    Is that guy a pansy poser for being concerned with how he’s dressed? Or is that uniform evidence of his performance as a man?

  • CaveClown

    Rollo glad it went well!

    But did you really wear white shoes?

    Tsk tsk lol

  • Andy

    I’ve heard of people putting up posters in public restrooms saying things like, “Is a woman cheating on you and you don’t know why?” or “Have you been called a misandrist for no reason?”

    How about “Does your girlfriend or wife treat sex like an obligation? Do you get the feeling that women don’t want what they say they want?”

  • Jeremy

    @CaveClown

    But did you really wear white shoes?

    In the L.A. salsa/bachata dance scene (not sure about elsewhere), white shoes are a sign of mastery.

  • CaveClown

    Big mental benefits to dressing well too. One of the reasons big retail puts people in uniform is not only for consistency, but because it changes employee behavior. “I have my blue vest on so now I must act the part of an employee.”

    Affirmations while you are putting on your daily best goes a long way. If you put your mindset in the right place while putting on your “uniform” than at some point the uniform will put you in the mindset.

    I literally watch and smile at myself in the mirror while dressing. I use “I will” statements out loud at the same time.

    I will succeed today.

    I will check my negative thoughts today.

    Etc

    Cue, routine, reward.

    Dressing is the cue. Affirmations is the routine. Strong mindset is the reward.

  • Jeremy

    Also to follow up on CaveClowns last comment as well as the entire subject….

    As boys we are given a big negative impression of dressy clothes when we’re kids. This is mostly because nice male clothing, when you’re just a kid, is horrible, absolutely horrible. Jackets only fit you for maybe a year, shirts never fit quite right. Dress shirts, shoes and a suit are scratchy, itchy, totally uncomfortable. Whats more that clothing is expensive to make, so to cut down on costs the materials your parents bought your clothes in were one step up from burlap so it all feels like you just strapped yourself into a pile of straw. When you’re wearing nice clothes you can’t be active which is totally anti-boy because boys have all the energy in the world. What’s more, that clothing really does not help a young boy look nearly as good as a grown man because generally men have to grow up a bit for their size and shoulder breadth to make an impression. Dress clothes really look more like a costume when a kid tries to wear a suit and tie, because that boy is not a man yet, and those clothes are supposed to reflect a man.

    Having spent my youth going to church every week, wearing a suit and tie, I can’t stand even looking at pictures of myself back then. I looked atrocious.

    But as an adult male older than say 25, all that male clothing you hated when you were a kid, well it really makes a huge difference.

  • ddd

    If people here spent more time living a productive life, growing in spiritual, professional physical and personal aspects and less time reading useless material, their problems would disappear.

    Getting laid is overrated.

  • longgone

    ddd,

    Get back to work.

  • Blaximus

    @ ddd,

    duly noted. now gtfo. thanks.

  • keyser Soze

    @ddd.
    Your Veterinarian did a great neutering surgery, wait a week(after a complete recovery) and you wouldn’t even care about posting here.

  • keyser Soze

    @ddd.
    And don’t remove the Cone.

  • Andy

    If people here spent more time living a productive life, growing in spiritual, professional physical and personal aspects and less time reading useless material, their problems would disappear.

    What makes you think we have problems?

  • Blaximus

    Style.

    It’s a personal thing. Men should make every attempt to buy clothing that fits, whether it’s t-shirts and jeans or dress clothes and suits.

    Ill fitting clothes can do you a great disservice. Locate a tailor or a dry cleaner that can do alterations in your area and put them to use. Over the past decade, my glutes have severely decreased. No problem for me, but the jeans I like appear to hang down in the back like a full diaper if I don’t have them taken up in the seat a bit. Dress pants don’t have that same shit-full effect, but I wear jeans a lot when I’m not working and the Homeless Guy look doesn’t work for me.

    Get a tailored suit. A decent tailor can do some magical shit with cloth. I have a bunch of off the rack suits that fit ” okay ” and look decent, but I have one custom suit that was made for me ( that cost as much a 3 of my rack suits ) and it’s as comfortable as wearing pajamas. Not only that, but it gives me the illusion of having a drastic V-shape and makes my little paunch vanish into thin air. The next time you see an actor being interviewed or walking the red carpet, check out the cut of his suit. I’ve seen Denzel Washington on 2 occasions, one he was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, one he was heading into a studio for and interview. Denzel in t shirt could really use an assload of crunches, but in a tailored suit, he looked 10 years younger. And a well made suit will last forever, so go with standard suit styles. Forget skinny suits or zoot suit looks.

    Lots of dudes don’t see the point of having a sense of personal style, but it boils down to your clothes helping to represent who you believe yourself to be. You get dressed feeling a particular way about yourself, but your fit and clothing choice might be saying something completely different.

    Over the years clothing has gotten really shitty in the quality department because everything is made in Bangladesh, Pakistan, India or China. It’s important to chose wisely because everything is lacking in the fit and quality department now. Do what you can to make your clothes fit better. Your spending dough on these items, they gotta work for you.

    So it’s not necessary to become a slave to the gay driven media idea of fashion with striped shirts and polka dot ties, but a haircut of your choosing and fitting clothes is all win, all day.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    Does anyone else love sexy lingerie on a woman as much as I do?

    Why? Why should a garter and stockings, a g-string or a fishnet body outfit accentuate (or at least should) a woman’s nice physique? What does that outfit signify about her when she wears it?

  • CaveClown

    Style and better hygiene = gay is just a shit test. My favorite response when a girl says something like that is, “yep, bet I have more beauty products than you do”

    At first they agree, probably thinking it was self deprecation on my part. But then the wheels start spinning. Funny. Usually see them with more makeup the next time ’round.

    With that said, you can take it too far. But 99% of men will never have that risk.

    Besides I know quite a few gay dudes and they are slobs in the style dept. They get laid anyway…

  • CaveClown

    Re: lingerie

    Shows her eagerness to impress.

    She has attraction.

    Its also overt sexuality on her part. Exciting for her and me.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    Right, so what she wears sends a message, yes?

  • Vitriol

    @Rollo
    “Why should a garter and stockings, a g-string or a fishnet body outfit accentuate (or at least should) a woman’s nice physique? What does that outfit signify about her when she wears it?”

    It signifies sexual availability. Although, it can be disappointing when you go somewhere like a Hooters and find out that every waitress isn’t willing to have sex with you (HA!). Great marketing though, and it’s obvious why a lot of bars, restaurants, etc. utilize that tactic to attract male clientele. Even other women seem to be attracted to places where the female employees are hired for their looks.

  • CaveClown

    Submission

  • CaveClown

    So when the wife only wears lingerie twice in over ten years?

    The medium is the message.

    And the FB wears (wore) sexy stuff every time?

    The medium is the message.

    *Lightbulb*

    Now that seems really freaking obvious in hindsight.

  • Jeremy

    When a woman wears lingerie in your presence, she’s signalling a number of things, all of which point to one conclusion.

    — She’s signalling that she is comfortable wearing that in your presence. This means she’s both comfortable with and desirous of you seeing her like that, and comfortable with her own body enough to wear it.
    — She’s signaling that she wants to remove barriers to your access to her body.
    — She’s signalling that she wants to emphasize herself as a feminine woman in your presence.
    — She’s signalling that she wants a physical reaction out of you, and she probably wants to feel it.
    — She’s very likely signalling what part of the cycle she’s in.

    Basically, human female lingerie is the equivalent of presenting in the animal world.

  • CaveClown

    And of course that means what we wear sends a message too…

  • Jeremy

    Everything you wear sends a message, which was Tanner’s message.

    If you’re naked you’re still sending a message. That message for guys is not exactly flattering, as nudity is mentally associated with male poverty. It’s really true when you think about it, it’s the masculine side that actually needs to adorn itself to demonstrate mastery. Nudity, or poor fitting clothing just says that you as a male cannot afford to look after yourself.

  • rugby11ljh

    Fashion and the red pill

    @Rollo
    “Is that guy a pansy poser for being concerned with how he’s dressed? Or is that uniform evidence of his performance as a man?”

    @Jeremy
    “In the L.A. salsa/bachata dance scene (not sure about elsewhere), white shoes are a sign of mastery.”

    Didn’t know that I want to get white shoes! Makes sense an a lot of levels.

    “But as an adult male older than say 25, all that male clothing you hated when you were a kid, well it really makes a huge difference.”

    Oh how true how true. People respect your appearance almost in a demanding way when you out dress people for respect and authority. If church has taught me anything it’s the importance of dress and than that connects directly to the burden of performance.

    @Caveclown
    “Dressing is the cue. Affirmations is the routine. Strong mindset is the reward.”
    Going to dress up to a dance this evening. Part of treating myself better as a man.

  • DandyDude

    @Rollo
    Indeed, clothing is communication. Dressing well is showing social intelligence.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    Why do you suppose ancient greek artisans fashioned armor like this?

    Surely there are more practical designs for armor. What message does anthropomorphically ideal armor convey to an opponent?

  • Badpainter

    Rollo – “Is that guy a pansy poser for being concerned with how he’s dressed? Or is that uniform evidence of his performance as a man?”

    It’s certainly evidence of his performance as a soldier.

    The fashion/style discussion is interesting. I am reminded of the post about having a “look.” What I take from this is that every man has a look in a general sense. The question for the individual man is does he have a look or does the look have him. We all wear uniforms of some sort and mostly those are by choice, even if that choice is thoughtless and ill conceived.

    In the blue collar world a man’s look can read like a military uniform. The hard hats covered with stickers, ball caps from previous jobs and employers, owning a worn set of arctic grade Carhartt outerware tells coworkers something about past performance. Differences in uniform, often age the amount and sort of filth tell people if one is an operator, welder, laborer, or management (clean white hardhats). The work clothes are extensions of identity based on performance.

    I had one employer that even had unofficial off duty uniforms. Everyone wore cargo shorts, golf shirts, ball caps, and sandals of some sort in the summer, but jeans, Henley tops and hiking boots in the winter, with clean Carhartt jackets. It was just a part of the culture. The guy with the eyeliner, black fingernails, and UFC T-shirts didn’t really fit in.

  • Badpainter

    Rollo, the Greek cuirass is easy.

    Explain this:

  • Rollo Tomassi

    I’m sure the courtesans of the period could tell you what every piece of this ensemble signified.

  • R.Burrell

    For this senior, rational, man in demand, it hit all the notes!

  • Jeremy

    @BP

    The heels are for riding.
    The pants loose in the thighs/hips is for fencing, likewise for the sleeves.
    The cape is for random inclement weather (Paris is famous for it).
    The gloves are for riding.
    The sword is basically the equivalent of open-carry now.
    The hat is to keep the sun off his pinkish complexion so he looks wealthy.
    The collar is again a weather garment in this case.

    Now, as to what he’s signalling…
    This man is signalling that he’s not poor. The sash is a wealth/mastery symbol. The trim on his shirt signals wealth. In all likelihood he is connected politically, and capable of defending himself, as well as getting on a horse and riding away. He’s basically MGTOW for 16th century France.

  • CaveClown

    BP,

    Ornamentation speaks of wealth, as all of that would be handmade. Impractical clothing speaks of wealth and power. Heels for height. Makeup speaks of exotic and foreign as most makeup was from “the orient” at that time. (if I recall correctly)

    Homo’s were shunned, so he would of been testing the edge of what was morally acceptable, so a bad boy.

    Chicks dig dandy’s.

  • milesaweek

    The Prince is the Prize…the Prize is the Prince!

  • Anonymous Reader

    @BigAl, no discussions yet, but the idea of possibly doing one in Vegas and another on the east coast annually has come up.

    Atlantic City! Invite Trump!

  • kfg

    “A man’s clothing should as though he chose them with taste, donned them with care, and then forgot about them.”

    Quite a number of people over the years have told me that I look particularly smashing in a suit and that they wished they could pull it off like I do.

    My secret? I don’t act like I’m wearing a suit. They’re just clothes. In fact, traditionally, they are the least formal clothes. The tuxedo is also informal lounge wear. It is only Enlightenment republican idealism, which eschews any form of formal attire, that has fostered the impression that these clothes are formal.

    “When I dress distinctively, men will openly mock me to the girls they’re with . . .”

    When I wear my own designs I have them AMOG themselves in front of their girls. One young man saw me walk into the room, leapt from his chair, ran across the room, actually threw himself at my feet and yelled, “Oh my God! I want one.”

    That was for one of my neo-traditional great cloaks.

    I started following Tanner’s blog when he first started out, but he was making a lot of small, neophyte mistakes, such as confusing a type of weave with a graphic pattern. Perhaps I’ll have to look at it again one of these days.

  • Rollo Tomassi

    A man in an expensive well tailored suit has a similar effect on women that a hot woman in lingerie has on men.

    I should add that this contrast also illustrates either sex’s incentives and sexual strategies.

  • kfg

    ” . . . another on the east coast . . .”

    Next year in Saratoga Springs.

  • scribblerg

    As a guy who wore Canali suits and Church’s shoes and Pink shirts for years, I can tell you that Rollo is right. Of course, it’s all context though. These days, a $200 pair of jeans, great shoes, nice belt, fitted shirt made of fine material and an expensive sports jacket is just as good in the circles I run in.

    I’m more than halfway to my target weight/size now and am getting eager to update the wardrobe. Ah yes, the rewards of putting myself first…

  • Atticus

    Fleezer

    My 20 year old is a AAA college hockey player. Since he was 11, team dress was a suit and tie. The girls he pulls and brings home are un-fucking-believable. Then he dumps them. Every man on every team he’s been on dresses sharp; even when they’re not suited up. They all pull awesome pussy. They don’t even give a shit.

    When he’s not dressed for hickey, his clothes matter. It may be AF or American Eagle but he pays attention.

    My 15 year old is the same way and he has the hottest girl in school.

    Style matters first, then it’s all attitude.

  • scribblerg

    @SJF – You are spot on man. Bottom up with other men is the way. We don’t need Rollo or anyone else to organize conferences, we can do Meetups and other things ourselves. I still have to stay in selfish mode till the end of the year as I must get my business where i want it to be (huge progress already, it’s now fun, like a game and I get great results every day). But starting next year? I’ll be game for organizing stuff in NYC, Boston and New Hampshire as I’m that’s where I mostly am.

    I’ve been corresponding with SJF and another man here and I can tell you that just emailing each other about what we are going through, and our victories and challenges alike is fantastic. Cheering each other on and offering criticism where necessary, it’s just superb.

    Form your gang. Get in the game of self-improvement. Develop your strength, courage, resilience, honor and skills. Live a life you can be proud of – please yourself first. Learn and cultivate social intelligence. People will flock to you, men and women alike, in business and personally. Embrace your masculinity, embrace yourself. Scrape out all negativity – people and thoughts and feelings, everything. Find guys who are as fired up about winning and living life full out as you are. Wave to the rest as you zoom by them.

    And enjoy it. Life really is a game. “It’s only life, after all…”

  • Badpainter

    Rollo – “Does anyone else love sexy lingerie on a woman as much as I do?”

    I’m not a fan. Sure I have my own costume fetishes, but lingerie really doesn’t do it for me.

  • Forge the Sky

    @kfg

    “My secret? I don’t act like I’m wearing a suit. They’re just clothes. In fact, traditionally, they are the least formal clothes. The tuxedo is also informal lounge wear. It is only Enlightenment republican idealism, which eschews any form of formal attire, that has fostered the impression that these clothes are formal.”

    Since work has lead me to wearing more formal clothes on a day-to-day basis, I’ve learned to be as comfortable in a suit as I am in jeans and a t-shirt. It makes a big difference in your vibe.

    And yeah, kinda blew my mind when I learned that our modern ‘formal’ wear is technically considered casual wear by traditional standards.

    “When I wear my own designs I have them AMOG themselves in front of their girls. One young man saw me walk into the room, leapt from his chair, ran across the room, actually threw himself at my feet and yelled, “Oh my God! I want one.”
    That was for one of my neo-traditional great cloaks.”

    Since our discussion a while back about this, I’ve actually experimented a bit with making clamys/greatcloak type garments. Not ready to go live with them yet but it’s been quite interesting. I still don’t have the ‘neo’ part of it down yet, current iterations still look like period dress. Ah well.

  • Forge the Sky

    “I’ve been corresponding with SJF and another man here…”

    Heh, appreciate the confidentiality. But I don’t mind if you say it’s me.

  • scribblerg

    @Rollo – Great write up and congratulations on pulling this off. Many people talk, few act. It sounded amazing and I wish I had been there. I’m back on my feet with my finances and business, which makes many things possible. Including jaunts to Vegas!! I love Vegas and will surely make the next event.

  • Forge the Sky

    Well, apparently this is a style thread now. Lol, wouldn’t have guessed that outcome.

    How about a case study.

    Once you have your shit figured out, this takes about 5 minutes to accomplish:

    Not visible: grey leather shoes, Varvados. Vividly colorful socks that still match the other tones. The fact that the brown of the pants is accomplished by a weave of several unexpected colors, giving the fabric an interesting, detailed look.

    The jug on the side is an original invention. Made from a small growler from a local cidery, it has a red fist logo in the front. The bracelet is from a trip to Portugal and is made of cork – a good conversation piece. The talisman around the neck is from a period of time in Western China, and has a variety of chick-crack type meanings. It can by tied around the belt to hang a few inches down the front of the thigh. Reactions to that are excellent.

    Everything is basically business casual, but the cut is custom and styled more to European taste. This makes everything stand out subtly. And each non-functional piece contains a story that contributes to individual identity.

    Total time to collect everything is minimal. Almost everything is done in 1-2 1-hour shots per year, when a very high-end store goes 70% off near the end of the season. No matter, don’t choose things that are restricted to one season, or that will soon be out of style. Still a bit pricier than mundane stores, but not by much. Tailoring is basically free under this arrangement.

    Basically, this allows some of the best tastemakers in the country do almost all of the work.

    Pretty much the entire wardrobe matches everything. So just grab whatever, and with a very few exceptions it’ll work. Quick, easy, no primping or thought needed.

    If you want to have a distinctive smell don’t get anything at the department store. There’s lots of interesting crazy stuff out there, but that’s another topic. Quick tip – you can get a 2 year supply of Caron Yatagan for like $30. Great if you’re going for retro.

    This approach lets a guy who never cared much for clothes and would rather be farming look exceptional walking down the street, without any bother.

    Three years ago, this all would have oscillated between ‘stiff suit’ and ‘baggy sweater, holes in jeans.’ Get past the learning curve and you can start not caring again, lol.

  • keyser Soze

    Rollo,
    “Does anyone else love sexy lingerie on a woman as much as I do?”

    I can’t stand it, I hate it. I find it manipulative, pedastalizing and an extra layer to remove . Instead I love it when a woman wears nothing.

    I’d rather have a women coming to my place wearing just a coat .

    Ps,
    I always told women that form of manipulation doesn’t work on me.

  • cheupez

    @ddd

    “Men should spent time living a productive life, growing in spiritual, professional, physical and personal aspects.”

    Agreed.

    Why did you have to fuck up such a good statement?

  • Rollo Tomassi

    That’s just IB cowardly making her presence felt as a sock puppet.

  • rugby11ljh

    @Rollo
    “A man in an expensive well tailored suit has a similar effect on women that a hot woman in lingerie has on men.

    I should add that this contrast also illustrates either sex’s incentives and sexual strategies.”

    Wore the suit at dinner with you and Tanner at Sinatra and everyone. My whole dance scene was impressed and a lot of women asked me to dance as opposed to me asking.

    @Atticus
    “Style matters first, then it’s all attitude.”
    Just came back from a dance it does matter.
    Attitude and the red pill are unstoppable.
    The anger phase may have an impact but it’s something I’m struggling with. Almost broke down in tears just now because the trauma I’ve gone through is finally being dealt with. Just not strong enough at this point to remind myself how empty I am an many social levels.

    Wonder what phase in the red pill that puts me?

    @scribblerg
    “Learn and cultivate social intelligence.”
    Working on that brother Glenn working on that.

    @Forge the sky
    Hey today was the best red pill experience I’ve had wore a suit and danced most girls asked me to dance.
    Need rest got a hard workout in morning.

    @Caveclown
    How are you holding up?

  • lh

    When it comes to “own your style” there is one particular impressive example in the movies: Tyler Durdens Bathrobe. I mean it’s not only a bathrobe, but it must be the shittiest bathrobe ever and it is also dirty. Still: the way Brad Pitt wears it makes it one of the sexiest pieces of clothing in the movies.

    What is it with the bathrobes? Besides Tyler Durden there are other famous “bathrobe men” like Hugh Hefner or the Big Lebowski. I’m seriously thinking about getting myself one to wear it at home. But what does wearing a bathrobe really communicate? Any ideas?

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