A Man in Demand Conference – The Review

encore

On August 7th I made the announcement about the Man In Demand Seminar I’d be speaking at along with Christian McQueen, Tanner Guzy from Masculine Style and Goldmund, whom I’d done the impromptu interview with while he was passing through Reno towards the end of July.

In that blog post’s comments a bit of criticism was leveled at both Christian McQueen and myself for agreeing to speak at this conference and in that discourse I promised readers the following:

I’ll tell you what Joe, I’ll give a personal, honest and objective review of the whole conference when it’s done. I’ll make sure I’m present for all the talks (which I was going to do anyway), and I’ll watch that all the money goes where it’s suppose to go (primarily paying for the venue – it’s spendy even by my standards).

If anything is shady, if anything is off the books, if any of the men who attend want to opine about it, you’ll know and read about it here.

You see, I have always had an open forum; if you want to say you got ripped off, be the first to post it here. Unlike other forums and Disqus threads, I neither edit, censor nor ban any critical opinions. I’ll pull blatant spamming, but the integrity of TRM is based on an open exchange of ideas.

So it’s not my rep on the line, it’s everyone else living up to their own. I have confidence in each of the speakers to deliver what they will. If they don’t, I and anyone else who chooses will let you know.

I don’t do this for a living Joe. If the manosphere shut down tomorrow I’d be making the same scratch I do now.

So here now is my honest and objective assessment of the entire conference.

Before I get into the breakdown of the entire weekend I want to first address that not one speaker at this event made money from it. I wont speak for the guys, but I know how much I spent on a flight, my three days accommodations, my transportation (not cheap in Vegas) while there, my food expenses, my drinks, etc. All this far exceeded the marginal profit (about $330) we each made from our appearances once the venue, insurance and security was paid for.

Christian provided all of us with the financials every step of the way up to and after the event sold out inside of 19 days after we announced it. Christian promptly paid us after the event sold out, a full 3 weeks beforehand. Each admission was $46. Divide that by 4 and each man there payed a mere $11.50 per speaker.

This was Vegas. The venue was everything (and more) than I expected. We wanted it to be affordable since travel and accommodations don’t come cheap. Beyond the basic admission we had a limited 4-person VIP dinner at Sinatra in Wynn’s Encore Casino Resort with the 4 of us for a bargain $98.

That said, everything was above board with Christian, all the speakers and every man who attended.

I put a bit of money out to make this happen, and for me it wasn’t anything concerning, but I know it was a stretch for some of the speakers as well as some of the attendees. I’ve always viewed money as currency. Not in the formal sense that money’s a currency (duh), but rather how money is like a current – as electricity is a current – and an energy with which I can do things.

This event was something I wanted to do. That’s not me trying to be magnanimous, it’s just how I approach things I think are worthwhile. And this seminar was most definitely worth my investment.

The Trip

Here’s a Vegas tip if you’ve never been; practically no one rents a car if you’re flying in. If you get a good one, stay with the same driver. The company I work with usually has me set up, but on this trip I got two good taxi drivers, Allan and his brother Jairo. Get their cell numbers and stay with that guy while you’re out. They appreciate it, and you get info on where cool shit is happening.

I wont bore you with the flight or my first night in town, but suffice to say the room was comfortable as to be expected and conveniently located where I needed to be. My evening was spent reviewing my talk and writing out points on flash cards. I treated myself to a couple of IPAs at the hotel bar and met a very hot bartender named Candace. She was 26 and we promptly got into conversation about her LTR ex-boyfriend, her son and where she was on the Preventive Medicine timeline. I mention her here because I gave her a copy of both my books and she seemed fascinated by them.

The Talk

Jairo dropped me off at our venue at around 8:45 Saturday morning. I was pleased to see the security guard we’d paid for was right in front on the street and immediately directed me to the conference room where I was greeted by Christian and our stunning events hostess (easily an HB 8.5 brunette). I then meet up with Goldmund and Tanner and settled in for the start.

The room was pretty hot at first (air conditioning problems), but our hostess resolved it before Goldmund had got halfway through his talk. I had a few men kind of tentatively look me up and down when I got into the room as if maybe they were wondering if it was me. This was my first public appearance so it was a bit strange for me as well. I was oddly more nervous when I first got into the venue and began having men ask me if I was Rollo Tomassi than when I started my actual talk 5 hours later.

Goldmund

As promised I took a seat in the back of the room and did my due diligence by taking notes on each speaker. Goldmund was first and in all honesty he built his talk up much more than I’d expected. What I knew was that he’d give a recounting of his trans-American trek he did this summer. What surprised me was how in depth he went about how getting out on the road both frees and educates a man about himself.

Nothing causes a man to learn more about himself and teaches self-reliance than putting yourself out in the open with only your wit and perseverance to sustain you. Goldmund’s talk was more than just an adventure guide and some video about the women he met and banged along the way. He made an effort to grow from it, not to mention meet and interact with many manosphere personalities along the way.

I was very impressed with his insights about his trip, but also that he made it accessible for the men who were present, many of whom (myself included) were 10-20 years his senior.

Tanner Guzy

I’ll confess, I wasn’t aware of Tanner and his Masculine Style blog until Christian had mentioned his name as a possible speaker for this conference. I looked him, and at first I thought, well he’s a ‘style guy’ – I was wrong. Both on his site and during his talk Tanner brings not just style advice for men, but presents it in such a succinctly Red Pill way I was forced to rethink a few of my own TRM principles about bearing, physical presence and appearance.

I daresay I learned the most from Tanner of all these talks. Granted, Tanner is a professional style consultant and works directly in men’s fashion, but he doesn’t simply suggest men wear this or that; Tanner explains why men should dress to be impressive and why men should care about their appearances.

It’s easy to quote the 48 Laws of Power about dressing the part to have others consider your status, but it’s important to grasp the Red Pill dynamics that go along with demonstrating our strengths, our status, our accomplishments and why what we wear indicates this.

I should add that during Tanner’s Q&A session (easily as long as my own went) I felt compelled to make the point that guys who hate on other men for being concerned with what they wear was in fact a form of intrasexual combat. Tanner had an example of some of his forum haters telling him “only fags worry about their clothes” and “real men don’t think about fashion”; essentially ‘just be yourself’, be manly, wear jeans and a t-shirt and it’s all good. I made the comment that this type of SMV disqualification is comparable to fat girls telling slightly less fat girls they look OK being fat on FaceBook to hold them in place and hinder any ideas of attempting to improve their SMV.

Christian

Christian’s talk, rather speech, surprised me most. I don’t think I was alone in expecting the Playboy game talk in some manner would be forthcoming from Christian, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. He was well prepared with a speech, he primarily read, and had obviously given a great amount of consideration to.

He began with suicide and divorce statistics and wove these facts into what I can only describe as a call to arms for men in reclaiming their masculinity. If he’d left it there it would’ve made an emotional impact enough (his voice choking with emotion during some moments), but the import of his speech was also about men defining masculinity for themselves in a feminine-centric culture that aligns itself against them from ever unplugging from it.

I’ve come to expect the happy-go-lucky Game proponent with the Rat Pack swagger to be larger than life from my 2 interviews, but Christian dropped that persona for this speech and it made his point for him. Goldmund described it as inspirational and motivational, and I’m thankful for Christian for being that at this event – it’s what was needed to round out the line up.

I should add that my good friend Sam Botta took it upon himself not only to fly out from L.A., but he also brought his MacBook Pro and some pro audio equipment to record me. He warmed up by doing a test run on Christian’s speech and while I don’t know when it’ll be available I think the recording will speak volumes about Christian’s actual maturity and the seriousness he’s capable of. It will surprise many of his critics.

Rollo Tomassi

Well shit, what can I say about myself that wont sound like I’m glossing myself? As I mentioned I was very nervous when I first got to the event in the morning and had men I’d only just met ask me to sign their books and let me know how grateful they were for my work. After a while I felt like I was more among a group of old friends than guys I needed to impress and that nervousness turned into a comfort kind of like speaking to a family gathering.

I’m sure that sounds all touchy-feely, but I don’t know how else to describe it. In between speakers I had men come to me, ask me questions, show me appreciation, tell me their stories about their lives and so on, so it put much more at ease. As the talks went on I saw that there were men attending who were obviously my senior – I’d guess late 50s maybe early 60s – as well as young men in their 20s, and this also put me into a family frame of mind.

I understand that my presence was a big draw for this conference. I’m humbled by that, especially when I have men in the military, men and their sons, men on the Vegas police force and men who’ve seen decades more of a feminine-centric society than I express their gratitude for my writing and ideas.

Still, going last has it’s disadvantages, not the least of which was that I’d taken notes of all the speakers’ talks ahead of mine. My head gets filled with things I think need to be expanded on, areas I thought should be explained better, and this then leads to my mentally rewriting my own talk and trying to jot down things I now want to cover too. I had to make a conscious effort to repress this, but I’m afraid some of it found its way into my talk.

As you might guess, I talked about what I know best and this is the influences of Hypergamy on women, men, society, etc. I didn’t mention it, but I had titled my talk Hypergamy – Micro to Macro the night before and this was my basic outline. I began by defining terms because I didn’t want to presume every guy in the audience was entirely familiar with my interpretations of what Red Pill, Alpha/Beta and Hypergamy mean in my referencing. This turned out better than I thought because it sparked a lot of ideas and later discussions while I was in-speech.

For a while I entertained the idea of simply making my speech an hour long Q&A session since so many men had hit me up with such great questions between talks and I really wanted to go into more detail. Instead I opted for sticking to building up Hypergamy from its evolutionary psychology and biological roots in ovulatory shift behaviors, through the personal and sociological implication. After this I held a Q&A and this really developed into the group discussion I’d hoped it would. So in the end I got a happy compromise and I hope I got to all the questions every man had.

Overview

As I said, Sam Botta was my hero for recording the audio of this. He told me I went on for 133 minutes and I can tell you it seemed to blow by so much faster. I will make that audio available for a reasonably purchasable download once Sam has it mastered in order to be fair with those who attended.

It was an honor to meet so many diverse men who’d also made an effort to make this event worthwhile. And while none of us made money from this I think every man there profited from the experience. I met a father and son, I had lunch with my commenter Rugby, I met commenter Jeremy, a Vegas police detective, a former Marine pilot who told me he would be insisting his sons read my books before they graduated high school, and so many more who I don’t have the space to mention here. Thank you for oming to this.

There were no “leaks” of where the venue was to be held. There were no publicity stunts or pandering to contrived social agendas. There were no bomb threats or feminist protests, and, as promised, no video or photography of our guests. I’m proud to say that this conference was well designed and well executed in a luxurious location with every effort made to ensure the anonymity of the men attending and all with the intent of helping each of us collectively learn and grow in a Red Pill awareness.

The VIP after-dinner at Sinatra was fantastic and some of the best camaraderie I’ve had with men I’d only met in person a few hours prior. The women at Encore were top shelf and the martinis were too.

I should also mention that at Encore I was ‘coined’ by one of our Air Force guests who was stationed in South Korea and was in Vegas for the event. Up until this time I was unaware of the significance of receiving an Air Force coin, but it was the highlight and honor of my weekend.

coin

Things We Could Do Better

Finally, at the end of the seminar we had a group Q&A and bluntly asked everyone what we could do to make a (possible) annual event better. Among these comments were a meet & greet or a group lunch which I thought would be good, but also I’d like to open up the VIP into a larger collective gathering in the evening.

My thoughts would be a larger venue, and of course a longer time frame for registration. Maybe a 2 day event over a long weekend with 6 or so speakers would be ideal.

So with that I want to thank all those who attended one last time here. A Man in Demand was as it should be, a collective experience and a collective discussion and that requires all of us being present and relating.

Goldumnd has a great write up of the event here, and Christian gives his thoughts here too. Also, Tanner had a funny video of his trip to the event here.

If you attended or you have and ideas or comments about this being an annual gathering you’d like to see please let me know in the comment thread. If I missed you or you were one of the guys I met or mentioned in this review please let me know.

Thanks gentlemen.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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[…] A Man in Demand Conference – The Review […]

rugby11ljh
Guest
rugby11ljh

“but it’s important to grasp the Red Pill dynamics that go along with demonstrating our strengths, our status, our accomplishments and why what we wear indicates this.”

That’s was a huge part of his influence.

Goldmans a badass to the core

Christian is the one who taught me how play is hugely important even if you have to Perform you may as well laugh With yourself.

JHypers
Guest

Being able to purchase the full audio of all the talks would be well worth the price in my opinion. I don’t think video would be inherently necessary, but if it’s considered, doing something along the lines of the 21 Convention (minus the ad-plastered YouTube channel) where people pay a subscription fee to stream the video for a limited time seems reasonable.

play don't pay
Guest
play don't pay

@ Rollo as I couldn’t attend ( based in uk) and as you had a Q&A session. I would like to take the opportunity to ask your and any of the commenters on here opinions on a subject where my stance seems to be different to most guys on the manosphere. It regards paying for everything during dates, most of the sphere has this tagged as beta behaviour ( you’re displaying low SMV ) suggesting you’re so grateful and needy for her company that you are prepared to pay for it. I however somewhat disagree, I mainly see women as… Read more »

lh
Guest
lh

While Rollo is making good points about masculine style and it’s importance, I still doubt a man would want to look as if style was all that matters in his life. Of all the possible missions a man could choose style seems inappropriate. Of course that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care about style at all, of course not. But I think it should appear effortless, which gives it a certain elegance.
The “Hipsters” don’t seem to get the lays as far as I can tell.

Andy
Guest
Andy

Of all the possible missions a man could choose style seems inappropriate.

IMO a woman isn’t going to look at it like that. If you can effortlessly pull off looking ten times better than every other guy – it’s going to set you apart. You’re basically AMOG’ing everyone else simply by walking through the door. You’ll be guy that all the women are looking at/wondering about. Also the guy the other guys want to disqualify.

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[…] Rollo’s observations on the “A Man in Demand” conference […]

longgone
Guest
longgone

play don’t pay,

I’m with you on this 100%, and in discussions on this site, was surprised to have paying for dates described as beta. (new to the ‘sphere) Your point #2 is a valuable refinement and I will put it into practice. Thanks

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

One thing concerns me:

“I treated myself to a couple of IPAs…”

I assume that was an affirmative choice, but why?

SJF
Guest
SJF

Thank you Rollo for your selfless help for other men. I have the idea that meet-ups in real life are an underutilized resource for red pill aware manosphere enthusiasts. There seems to be a well-deserved reverence for the opportunity to talk to like minded individuals about masculine self-improvement. I tremendously enjoyed the opportunity to hang out on several occasions in a virtual way with other guys on Sun Wukong’s rountable online discussions. I discovered a friend in real life four years ago with like minded interests separate from the manosphere and for the last 2 1/2 years then discovered his… Read more »

Andy
Guest
Andy

So, I think the time has come for venues to facilitate a bottoms-up grass-roots effort to help individuals with masculine self improvement and further an individual’s pursuit of enlightened self-interest IRL (in real life). Have you had any luck with converting any blue pill men yourself? I have been toying with the idea of starting a “Positive Masculinity” adult ed community service class in my town. I’m a bit hesitant just because I gave The Rational Male book to my brother and his reaction was “Meh.” Do you think that the Red Pill is something that needs to be sought… Read more »

SJF
Guest
SJF

“Have you had any luck with converting any blue pill men yourself?”

Haven’t given a thought to trying and I’m not interested in blue pill men unless they ask for help and truly mean it.

“Do you think that the Red Pill is something that needs to be sought rather than evangelized?”

Absolutely.

Naproxen
Guest
Naproxen

Rollo, Play: I’ve always held that going Dutch (splitting the check) disqualifies the meeting as a date. I’ll always pay for the first date, regardless of if I think it went well. I don’t mind switching off. After paying for the first two or three, they’ll start insisting they “get this one”. Once they do that, I find I end up paying roughly 60-70% of future dates. There’s one thing though that I do look for. If she doesn’t reach for her purse and assumes I’m paying for the first date simply because I’m a man, it’s a huge red… Read more »

SJF
Guest
SJF

Andy, keep in mind that one of the ways a man’s brain can change through neuro-plasticity and get out of deep ingrained ruts is through true desire. (Ref: Marc Lewis “The Biology of Desire”).

BigAl
Guest
BigAl

When is the next one?!

Would you consider a different location (i.e. Louisiana casinos) or do you want to stick with Vegas?

Andy
Guest
Andy

“Do you think that the Red Pill is something that needs to be sought rather than evangelized?”

Absolutely.

How about a certain level of intelligence? It’s hard not to notice the men here seem to be intellectually curious, and smart. Maybe the reality is that we ARE the 20% and that’s all there will be.

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

I didn’t want to say it first, but yeah, I felt Tanner had the best presentation at the conference. Frankly that surprised me at the time, but when I thought about it, it made sense since his entire presentation was about presenting yourself. More than anyone I’ve seen, Tanner has a knack for making something that blue-pill thinking has tried long and hard to convince men was “gay” (i.e., male style) appropriately sound like something that is essential for your own masculinity. He did this with the perfect touch of not taking himself or his business too seriously as at… Read more »

Forge the Sky
Guest
Forge the Sky

@lh

A man’s clothing should as though he chose them with taste, donned them with care, and then forgot about them.

@Andy

When I dress distinctively, men will openly mock me to the girls they’re with. Then the girl will keep looking at me. Ha, being a target of thinly-veiled insecurity posing as an AMOG is a great DHV.

Andy
Guest
Andy

Definitely…and the community needs to be there when a man seeks it out.

Hard to watch your good looking and successful brother marry a fatty.

peregrinejohn
Guest
peregrinejohn

When the event was announced, I knew I wouldn’t be able to go, and sincerely regretted it. My hope then and now is that there will be another, preferably with timing that works with mine. By all reports, it’s everything we hoped it would be. Andy, I’m finding (as did SJF) that there are quite a few men out there who are looking for this, having seen serious glitches in the Matrix, but who haven’t come across it yet. Even if it’s only the 20% you suggest who are able to manage the truth, I believe that most of the… Read more »

play don't pay
Guest
play don't pay

I’m fully aware that my “play don’t pay” tag is incongruent with my question lol. I refuse to “pay” in regard to divorce rape, and alimony. However I do pay for my boys private school and about 4 joint holidays/ year. I think my average spend on a date is around $180 and considering 50% of that is spent on me, my take is that if the $90 spent on my date is an issue, then I need to address other areas of my life so that it becomes a non issue. @ Rollo I agree with your analysis with… Read more »

lh
Guest
lh

@Rollo: Good. I looked at his side a few weeks ago and found a some pictures “over the top” or too “Hipsteresk” for my taste. But the idea to put mind in it is sound. I changed some furniture in my living room after reading the site. @Andy: Converting BP men is a big task. From my experience the more actual experience with women, the easier they understand. I got some limited success with my BP friends and family though. It took months of coming back to it. In case of one incel friend it helped to seduce his “dream-girl”… Read more »

CrabRangoon
Guest
CrabRangoon

@Rollo

Congrats on a successful seminar! I could not attend but fully intend on going to future events like this. It’s awesome you guys all got up there and really reached out to our fellow men. I’m glad to see this all picking up more and more steam over the past couple years. Keep doing what you’re doing!

Andy
Guest
Andy

Andy, I’m finding (as did SJF) that there are quite a few men out there who are looking for this, having seen serious glitches in the Matrix, but who haven’t come across it yet.

Definitely…and the community needs to be there when a man seeks it out.

Do you think it’s possible to reach them in real life? I would love to start some sort of local fraternity or something… Partly to help people. Partly because it’s lonely walking amongst the sheep all day. Online only does so much for you.

fleezer
Guest
fleezer

“Of all the possible missions a man could choose style seems inappropriate” fashion is for women, gay men and insecure celebrities. peacocking was a flash trend in a small minority of urban locales that was dead as soon as it had a name. look at photos of your grandfathers. clothing was functional. the only thing that mattered was that it lasted. one troy ounce of gold for one tailored suit of clothes. remember back to when you were a boy. boys could not care less about clothes. we get dirty, come home grass-stained, put holes in the knees, wear the… Read more »

Vitriol
Guest
Vitriol

@play don’t pay “…most of the sphere has this tagged as beta behaviour ( you’re displaying low SMV ) suggesting you’re so grateful and needy for her company that you are prepared to pay for it. I however somewhat disagree, I mainly see women as a form of entertainment these days, and I believe that if done from a strong frame and with a don’t give a Fuck about the money attitude ( because the level of spend is not going to affect my finances) then I believe if done in the right way with confidence and charm it can… Read more »

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

@fleezer

There’s a difference between style and fashion, and it makes all the difference in your comment.

style: a distinctive appearance, typically determined by the principles according to which something is designed.
fashion: a popular trend, especially in styles of dress and ornament or manners of behavior

As a man you should have a style, while mostly ignoring fashion.

The Diplomat
Guest
The Diplomat

@Rollo

Thanks for the excellent post-game breakdown of the event. I very strongly considered going–just to meet you face-to-face and personally thank you for everything you’ve done. I don’t indulge many regrets in my life, but missing out on this one almost qualifies.

Vitriol
Guest
Vitriol

@fleezer “on a very base level women may recognize a provider beta based on his willingness to wear a preapproved costume. women who say they like a man in uniform (military wives, cop wives, etc) always end up cheating on them. doing what you’re told, especially in regards to something as simple and insignificant as getting dressed, signals your willingness to follow orders (from her).” This is a very important point. The men who women seek out for relationships are men who can be controlled. The guys I know who aren’t very strong willed or bold are usually the ones… Read more »

The Diplomat
Guest
The Diplomat

@fleezer

To quote Frank Zappa (who was sitting on a political discussion panel when he said it), “Don’t kid yourselves. Everyone here is wearing a uniform.” Jeremy succinctly points out the critical difference. Style definitely matters.

The medium IS the message–which applies across the board.

The Diplomat
Guest
The Diplomat

@fleezer
P.S. And apparently (after a quick internet search reveals), Zappa had originally said it to a roomful of hippies at an earlier date, but a good truth bears repetition. The fact that he later repeated it to a bunch of stuffy old white men displays his strong frame and the universality of his message.

“Everybody in this room is wearing a uniform. Don’t kid yourself.” – Frank Zappa to a bunch of (apparently?) British hippies on “Burnt Weeny Sandwich” some time before or during 1970.

Forge the Sky
Guest
Forge the Sky

@play don’t pay

Frame is everything. If you’re teaching people not to have a supplicative frame, it can be useful to make them avoid things that could seem like ‘serving,’ like paying for a date. Too many men will land themselves on a lot of useless dates that way, where the girl gets a free dinner and dispenses thanks and a hug.

Once you have the correct, self-oriented frame, you realize it’s all about context.

lh
Guest
lh

@play don’t pay:

Being anxious about doing everything right is very bad. So don’t take this point too serious.

But basically:

if she has to make a sacrifice for you => your value increases
if you make a sacrifice for her => your value decreases

That is how her emotional perception will be. Her rationalization will differ of course.

fleezer
Guest
fleezer

“style: a distinctive appearance, typically determined by the principles according to which something is designed.” thanks for the clarification, Jeremy. men are designed by their genes. a man’s style (distinctive appearance) is literally just the man then, or the man plus his costume, or the man plus his costume plus his haircut, or the man plus his costume plus his haircut plus his jewelry? so a naked, unshaven, unclipped man (even ingomar the barbarian wore a costume and ended up enslaved by a woman) is the purest expression of style and anything beyond that is fashion to a degree? I… Read more »

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

Ah, that was one of the other times my jaw dropped to the floor at the conference. Tanner had a slide in his presentation that was his personal picture. It was a picture of a bunch of punk rockers rocking it out in a room in a house, they all had obscenely spiked and dyed hair, and were wearing exactly what you’d expect such guys to wear. Most of the guys in the picture had their back turned to the camera as a result of their activity at the time. It turns out, Tanner himself was one of the guys… Read more »

Forge the Sky
Guest
Forge the Sky

@SJF “So, I think the time has come for venues to facilitate a bottoms-up grass-roots effort to help individuals with masculine self improvement and further an individual’s pursuit of enlightened self-interest IRL (in real life). Any thoughts?” Hard to say how possible this is without knowing how many men are redpill. But heck, if there’s many within spitting distance of Lansing maybe we could stir something up 😉 Re: converting men to redpill. I agree that probably only a minority of men are capable. And it takes some sort of trauma, or extensive experience with women. Direct proselytizing isn’t likely… Read more »

The Diplomat
Guest
The Diplomat

A little O/T for this thread, but on-topic for TRM in general.

I hadn’t intended it, but I got to thinking about how RP as fuck Zappa always was. A conservative libertarian free thinker who walked his talk. Watch him hold frame and own the room. His most vocal opponent here uses every FI tactic in the book, from shaming, questioning his manhood, and resorting to purely irrational/emotional argumentation. Watch Zappa’s body language, facial expressions, frame control, and amused mastery in action. It’s a great textbook demonstration of solid RP behavior and DHV in action.

Instructive.

lh
Guest
lh

“guys begin to care about style only because they think it will attract women. this is very beta (and pushed by an advertising/gay controlled media).”

That’s too harsh. There is a reason narcissism as part of the dark triad is such a thing. The end of your comment has the point: Wear it because you are so great and maybe even in love with yourself.

Another important point for masculine style is how you wear it after it was chosen: It should look like you forgot about it.

lh
Guest
lh

Whenever you “put mind into something” this “energy of mind” will create an attraction for that thing. That’s what art is all about. Human minds are attracted by such “pieces of mind”. That’s also true for behavior and of course clothing or style too.

Today I chose some simple black t-shirt which I happen to like because of how it falls. Dr. Borderline complimented me later in the day for “the look of my old t-shirts on me”. And I don’t even think it was manipulation – at least not on her part.

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

@fleezer men are designed by their genes. a man’s style (distinctive appearance) is literally just the man then, or the man plus his costume, or the man plus his costume plus his haircut, or the man plus his costume plus his haircut plus his jewelry? so a naked, unshaven, unclipped man (even ingomar the barbarian wore a costume and ended up enslaved by a woman) is the purest expression of style and anything beyond that is fashion to a degree? There is some conflation there. Men are perhaps “designed by” genes, but the definition I used doesn’t specify the method… Read more »

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

@The Diplomat

Great example. I had seen that video before. Frank owns the entire show. Their topic on “obscene speech” literally comes across as a waste of time with cackling hens and he puts those blue-pill conservatives in their place quite easily. I actually tend to recite what he says in that episode in my head when I’m confronted with people being offended by words.

“They’re just words, we’re talking about words.”

DandyDude
Guest
DandyDude

@fleezer
The link Rollo posted explains a lot, but to make it clearer, look to the likes of Louis IV of France and other powerful men in the history of mankind: you’ll see that back in the day it was men that cared more about clothes and their appearance, for the simple fact that clothes show your status in the community. The current state of affairs, where clothing, fashion and caring about your appearance are considered feminine things, is a by-product of the first Industrial Revolution, what John Carl Flugel named “the great masculine renunciation” (The Spirit of Clothes, 1930).

CaveClown
Guest
CaveClown

Rollo glad it went well!

But did you really wear white shoes?

Tsk tsk lol

Andy
Guest
Andy

I’ve heard of people putting up posters in public restrooms saying things like, “Is a woman cheating on you and you don’t know why?” or “Have you been called a misandrist for no reason?”

How about “Does your girlfriend or wife treat sex like an obligation? Do you get the feeling that women don’t want what they say they want?”

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

@CaveClown

But did you really wear white shoes?

In the L.A. salsa/bachata dance scene (not sure about elsewhere), white shoes are a sign of mastery.

CaveClown
Guest
CaveClown

Big mental benefits to dressing well too. One of the reasons big retail puts people in uniform is not only for consistency, but because it changes employee behavior. “I have my blue vest on so now I must act the part of an employee.” Affirmations while you are putting on your daily best goes a long way. If you put your mindset in the right place while putting on your “uniform” than at some point the uniform will put you in the mindset. I literally watch and smile at myself in the mirror while dressing. I use “I will” statements… Read more »

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

Also to follow up on CaveClowns last comment as well as the entire subject…. As boys we are given a big negative impression of dressy clothes when we’re kids. This is mostly because nice male clothing, when you’re just a kid, is horrible, absolutely horrible. Jackets only fit you for maybe a year, shirts never fit quite right. Dress shirts, shoes and a suit are scratchy, itchy, totally uncomfortable. Whats more that clothing is expensive to make, so to cut down on costs the materials your parents bought your clothes in were one step up from burlap so it all… Read more »

ddd
Guest
ddd

If people here spent more time living a productive life, growing in spiritual, professional physical and personal aspects and less time reading useless material, their problems would disappear.

Getting laid is overrated.

longgone
Guest
longgone

ddd,

Get back to work.

Blaximus
Guest
Blaximus

@ ddd,

duly noted. now gtfo. thanks.

keyser Soze
Guest
keyser Soze

@ddd.
Your Veterinarian did a great neutering surgery, wait a week(after a complete recovery) and you wouldn’t even care about posting here.

keyser Soze
Guest
keyser Soze

@ddd.
And don’t remove the Cone.

Andy
Guest
Andy

If people here spent more time living a productive life, growing in spiritual, professional physical and personal aspects and less time reading useless material, their problems would disappear.

What makes you think we have problems?

Blaximus
Guest
Blaximus

Style. It’s a personal thing. Men should make every attempt to buy clothing that fits, whether it’s t-shirts and jeans or dress clothes and suits. Ill fitting clothes can do you a great disservice. Locate a tailor or a dry cleaner that can do alterations in your area and put them to use. Over the past decade, my glutes have severely decreased. No problem for me, but the jeans I like appear to hang down in the back like a full diaper if I don’t have them taken up in the seat a bit. Dress pants don’t have that same… Read more »

CaveClown
Guest
CaveClown

Style and better hygiene = gay is just a shit test. My favorite response when a girl says something like that is, “yep, bet I have more beauty products than you do”

At first they agree, probably thinking it was self deprecation on my part. But then the wheels start spinning. Funny. Usually see them with more makeup the next time ’round.

With that said, you can take it too far. But 99% of men will never have that risk.

Besides I know quite a few gay dudes and they are slobs in the style dept. They get laid anyway…

CaveClown
Guest
CaveClown

Re: lingerie

Shows her eagerness to impress.

She has attraction.

Its also overt sexuality on her part. Exciting for her and me.

Vitriol
Guest
Vitriol

@Rollo
“Why should a garter and stockings, a g-string or a fishnet body outfit accentuate (or at least should) a woman’s nice physique? What does that outfit signify about her when she wears it?”

It signifies sexual availability. Although, it can be disappointing when you go somewhere like a Hooters and find out that every waitress isn’t willing to have sex with you (HA!). Great marketing though, and it’s obvious why a lot of bars, restaurants, etc. utilize that tactic to attract male clientele. Even other women seem to be attracted to places where the female employees are hired for their looks.

CaveClown
Guest
CaveClown

Submission

CaveClown
Guest
CaveClown

So when the wife only wears lingerie twice in over ten years?

The medium is the message.

And the FB wears (wore) sexy stuff every time?

The medium is the message.

*Lightbulb*

Now that seems really freaking obvious in hindsight.

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

When a woman wears lingerie in your presence, she’s signalling a number of things, all of which point to one conclusion. — She’s signalling that she is comfortable wearing that in your presence. This means she’s both comfortable with and desirous of you seeing her like that, and comfortable with her own body enough to wear it. — She’s signaling that she wants to remove barriers to your access to her body. — She’s signalling that she wants to emphasize herself as a feminine woman in your presence. — She’s signalling that she wants a physical reaction out of you,… Read more »

CaveClown
Guest
CaveClown

And of course that means what we wear sends a message too…

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

Everything you wear sends a message, which was Tanner’s message.

If you’re naked you’re still sending a message. That message for guys is not exactly flattering, as nudity is mentally associated with male poverty. It’s really true when you think about it, it’s the masculine side that actually needs to adorn itself to demonstrate mastery. Nudity, or poor fitting clothing just says that you as a male cannot afford to look after yourself.

rugby11ljh
Guest
rugby11ljh

Fashion and the red pill @Rollo “Is that guy a pansy poser for being concerned with how he’s dressed? Or is that uniform evidence of his performance as a man?” http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uYjnWXFTQkM @Jeremy “In the L.A. salsa/bachata dance scene (not sure about elsewhere), white shoes are a sign of mastery.” Didn’t know that I want to get white shoes! Makes sense an a lot of levels. “But as an adult male older than say 25, all that male clothing you hated when you were a kid, well it really makes a huge difference.” Oh how true how true. People respect your… Read more »

DandyDude
Guest
DandyDude

@Rollo
Indeed, clothing is communication. Dressing well is showing social intelligence.

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

Rollo – “Is that guy a pansy poser for being concerned with how he’s dressed? Or is that uniform evidence of his performance as a man?” It’s certainly evidence of his performance as a soldier. The fashion/style discussion is interesting. I am reminded of the post about having a “look.” What I take from this is that every man has a look in a general sense. The question for the individual man is does he have a look or does the look have him. We all wear uniforms of some sort and mostly those are by choice, even if that… Read more »

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

Rollo, the Greek cuirass is easy.

Explain this:

http://world4.eu/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/french-musketeer-costume-055.jpg

R.Burrell
Guest

For this senior, rational, man in demand, it hit all the notes!

Jeremy
Guest
Jeremy

@BP The heels are for riding. The pants loose in the thighs/hips is for fencing, likewise for the sleeves. The cape is for random inclement weather (Paris is famous for it). The gloves are for riding. The sword is basically the equivalent of open-carry now. The hat is to keep the sun off his pinkish complexion so he looks wealthy. The collar is again a weather garment in this case. Now, as to what he’s signalling… This man is signalling that he’s not poor. The sash is a wealth/mastery symbol. The trim on his shirt signals wealth. In all likelihood… Read more »

CaveClown
Guest
CaveClown

BP,

Ornamentation speaks of wealth, as all of that would be handmade. Impractical clothing speaks of wealth and power. Heels for height. Makeup speaks of exotic and foreign as most makeup was from “the orient” at that time. (if I recall correctly)

Homo’s were shunned, so he would of been testing the edge of what was morally acceptable, so a bad boy.

Chicks dig dandy’s.

milesaweek
Guest

The Prince is the Prize…the Prize is the Prince!

Anonymous Reader
Guest
Anonymous Reader

@BigAl, no discussions yet, but the idea of possibly doing one in Vegas and another on the east coast annually has come up.

Atlantic City! Invite Trump!

kfg
Guest
kfg

“A man’s clothing should as though he chose them with taste, donned them with care, and then forgot about them.” Quite a number of people over the years have told me that I look particularly smashing in a suit and that they wished they could pull it off like I do. My secret? I don’t act like I’m wearing a suit. They’re just clothes. In fact, traditionally, they are the least formal clothes. The tuxedo is also informal lounge wear. It is only Enlightenment republican idealism, which eschews any form of formal attire, that has fostered the impression that these… Read more »

kfg
Guest
kfg

” . . . another on the east coast . . .”

Next year in Saratoga Springs.

scribblerg
Guest
scribblerg

As a guy who wore Canali suits and Church’s shoes and Pink shirts for years, I can tell you that Rollo is right. Of course, it’s all context though. These days, a $200 pair of jeans, great shoes, nice belt, fitted shirt made of fine material and an expensive sports jacket is just as good in the circles I run in.

I’m more than halfway to my target weight/size now and am getting eager to update the wardrobe. Ah yes, the rewards of putting myself first…

Atticus
Guest
Atticus

Fleezer My 20 year old is a AAA college hockey player. Since he was 11, team dress was a suit and tie. The girls he pulls and brings home are un-fucking-believable. Then he dumps them. Every man on every team he’s been on dresses sharp; even when they’re not suited up. They all pull awesome pussy. They don’t even give a shit. When he’s not dressed for hickey, his clothes matter. It may be AF or American Eagle but he pays attention. My 15 year old is the same way and he has the hottest girl in school. Style matters… Read more »

scribblerg
Guest
scribblerg

@SJF – You are spot on man. Bottom up with other men is the way. We don’t need Rollo or anyone else to organize conferences, we can do Meetups and other things ourselves. I still have to stay in selfish mode till the end of the year as I must get my business where i want it to be (huge progress already, it’s now fun, like a game and I get great results every day). But starting next year? I’ll be game for organizing stuff in NYC, Boston and New Hampshire as I’m that’s where I mostly am. I’ve been… Read more »

Badpainter
Guest
Badpainter

Rollo – “Does anyone else love sexy lingerie on a woman as much as I do?”

I’m not a fan. Sure I have my own costume fetishes, but lingerie really doesn’t do it for me.

Forge the Sky
Guest
Forge the Sky

@kfg “My secret? I don’t act like I’m wearing a suit. They’re just clothes. In fact, traditionally, they are the least formal clothes. The tuxedo is also informal lounge wear. It is only Enlightenment republican idealism, which eschews any form of formal attire, that has fostered the impression that these clothes are formal.” Since work has lead me to wearing more formal clothes on a day-to-day basis, I’ve learned to be as comfortable in a suit as I am in jeans and a t-shirt. It makes a big difference in your vibe. And yeah, kinda blew my mind when I… Read more »

Forge the Sky
Guest
Forge the Sky

“I’ve been corresponding with SJF and another man here…”

Heh, appreciate the confidentiality. But I don’t mind if you say it’s me.

scribblerg
Guest
scribblerg

@Rollo – Great write up and congratulations on pulling this off. Many people talk, few act. It sounded amazing and I wish I had been there. I’m back on my feet with my finances and business, which makes many things possible. Including jaunts to Vegas!! I love Vegas and will surely make the next event.

Forge the Sky
Guest
Forge the Sky

Well, apparently this is a style thread now. Lol, wouldn’t have guessed that outcome. How about a case study. Once you have your shit figured out, this takes about 5 minutes to accomplish: Not visible: grey leather shoes, Varvados. Vividly colorful socks that still match the other tones. The fact that the brown of the pants is accomplished by a weave of several unexpected colors, giving the fabric an interesting, detailed look. The jug on the side is an original invention. Made from a small growler from a local cidery, it has a red fist logo in the front. The… Read more »

keyser Soze
Guest
keyser Soze

Rollo,
“Does anyone else love sexy lingerie on a woman as much as I do?”

I can’t stand it, I hate it. I find it manipulative, pedastalizing and an extra layer to remove . Instead I love it when a woman wears nothing.

I’d rather have a women coming to my place wearing just a coat .

Ps,
I always told women that form of manipulation doesn’t work on me.

cheupez
Guest

@ddd

“Men should spent time living a productive life, growing in spiritual, professional, physical and personal aspects.”

Agreed.

Why did you have to fuck up such a good statement?

rugby11ljh
Guest
rugby11ljh

@Rollo “A man in an expensive well tailored suit has a similar effect on women that a hot woman in lingerie has on men. I should add that this contrast also illustrates either sex’s incentives and sexual strategies.” Wore the suit at dinner with you and Tanner at Sinatra and everyone. My whole dance scene was impressed and a lot of women asked me to dance as opposed to me asking. @Atticus “Style matters first, then it’s all attitude.” Just came back from a dance it does matter. Attitude and the red pill are unstoppable. The anger phase may have… Read more »

lh
Guest
lh

When it comes to “own your style” there is one particular impressive example in the movies: Tyler Durdens Bathrobe. I mean it’s not only a bathrobe, but it must be the shittiest bathrobe ever and it is also dirty. Still: the way Brad Pitt wears it makes it one of the sexiest pieces of clothing in the movies. What is it with the bathrobes? Besides Tyler Durden there are other famous “bathrobe men” like Hugh Hefner or the Big Lebowski. I’m seriously thinking about getting myself one to wear it at home. But what does wearing a bathrobe really communicate?… Read more »

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