The Ballad of Clark Kent

When Lois Lane met Superman he was fighting crime, could bend steel in his bare hands, stop locomotives, leap over tall buildings in a single bound; shit, Superman could fly! Then one day he met Lois and swept her away, rocked her world in the sack and fell in love with her because thats what Super-Men do. After a year of this whirlwind Lois starts to feel her relationship with Superman was lacking something, “Why does he have to always be out there fighting crime, huh? Why does he always have to prove he’s so Macho? Does it threaten his Ego? He really needs to get in touch with his feminine side. What about MY needs and why can’t he just grow up and get a real job? I’m not getting any younger you know, he’s got some responsibilities to live up to. When am I gonna see a ring?”

So eventually this wears down on Superman and he submits to Lois’ requests (demands?). After all he ‘should’ really ‘grow up’ anyway, right? It’s the right thing to do. So Superman changes his name to Clark Kent (Super-‘MAN’ was so male self-aggrandizing anyway) and lands a job as a reporter at a great metropolitan newspaper. Clark begins wearing glasses – even though he can see X-Rays, and shoot lasers out his eyes, he wears them because Lois says it makes him look distinguished, intellectual and SHE likes them.

Time goes on and Lois and Clark marry. 5 years into the marriage Lois gets bored. Same old, same old. Clark is so mundane and unassuming. She longs for the days he would fly and do that funny steel bending trick he used to do when they were dating. He hasn’t done any of that for so long; not because he can’t, but because he’s afraid she’ll get upset with him and not put out that evening if he gets ‘cocky’ with her. In fact she’s not putting out even half as much as she used to these days. Clark just doesn’t arouse her as much as he once did and she just can’t seem to put her finger on the reason for it.

Then one night Lois ran into a wealthy fellow named Bruce Wayne at a charity mixer. Bruce was dark, mysterious and in great shape! He couldn’t fly, but he made up for that in so many other ways. He fought crime! He wore a mask and spoke in short, purposeful sentences, never mincing words. He didn’t wear glasses (that was so retro!) and he came and went at the time of his pleasing, not hers. He sent tingles down Lois’ spine (and other places that hadn’t felt tingles in a while) when he began seeing her.

The weeks went by until, after a 60 hour work week at the Daily Planet (swanky apartments don’t rent cheap), Clark made his way home on the subway (since flying had been out of the question for a while now) and picked up a dozen roses to surprise Lois with (he thought she tended to put out when he showed his ‘feminine side’) when he got back to the apartment. However it was poor Clark who got the surprise upon discovering Bruce Wayne bending Lois over the kitchen table when he opened the door. Bruce propmptly toweled off while Clark, slack-jawed with horror, watched speechless.

“How could you? After all we’ve meant to each other!” Clark began to cry as Bruce excused himself from the now estranged couple. Clark was used to crying a lot now to show his sensitivity.

“What could you have possibly seen in a guy like that?!” He shrieked like a school girl.

“Well,..I couldn’t help myself” Lois said indifferently, “Batman is a Superhero.”

And that’s the danger, where do you end and she begins? The reason I wrote Identity Crisis (almost 5 years ago) was exactly this: Men tend to adopt a position of constantly qualifying for a woman’s intimacy, and understandably women reinforce this because to puts them in control of the frame and aids in their sexual selection. Most guys willingly make fundamental changes if they believe it will increase their chances of qualifying for a woman’s intimacy. Are they genuinely inspired, or are they deductively reasoned changes meant to qualify for her acceptance – A+B= sex?

The real insidious part is that the more deprived a man is of that intimacy, the more he’s likely to convince himself that the change is genuine. Whenever I hear a guy or a woman say “we’re working on our relationship” or “relationships are a lot of work and compromise”, it translates to the man changing or compromising to better fit the woman’s ideal. He’s being ‘fixed’, he’s broken and he needs to change. It often gets to the point where the guy will believe that there IS something genuinely wrong with him – it’s her reality he must conform to because the feminine reality is the ‘proper’ reality. The rude awakening comes when she discovers that the man she’s fixed her husband to be is the polar opposite of the Man she was attracted to at the start.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

30 comments on “The Ballad of Clark Kent

  1. “Whenever I hear a guy or a woman say “we’re working on our relationship” or “relationships are a lot of work and compromise”, it translates to the man changing or compromising to better fit the woman’s ideal. He’s being ‘fixed’, he’s broken and he needs to change. It often gets to the point where the guy will believe that there IS something genuinely wrong with him – it’s her reality he must conform to because the feminine reality is the ‘proper’ reality. The rude awakening comes when she discovers that the man she’s fixed her husband to be is the polar opposite of the Man she was attracted to at the start.”

    With my newly opened eyes, it is deeply disturbing to see how this was my marriage. Completely convinced I was the a$$hole, and the problem was me, I finally just ended up eating my way deeper into depression and self-hatred.

  2. Ya, the ever ongoing shit test.

    Woman: “I want you to do X”

    Man: “Ok.”

    Woman: “What kind of a man would do X?!”

    I want you to:
    Hold my purse for a minute while I check out these shoes.
    Not discretely check out other girls asses while I’m talking to you.
    Answer your phone whenever I call.
    Assure monogamy.

    It’s all very counter intuitive, until experience informs your intuition.

  3. Women are in it for the race, not for the medal.

    Women are only happy when it rains. Their hypergamous nature ensures that they will never truly be satisfied. A little dissatisfaction is natural and is CRUCIAL to maintaining a relationship with them.

    I remember the first time a girlfriend told me “You know I really love the fact that you are ambitous!” just to turn around and bitch at me for having to work until 8 o’clock at night. They can’t have it both ways but their brains don’t understand this so it is up to you to ALLOW a certain amount of dissatisfaction, anxiety, whatever you want to call it. You have to moderate it of course because if it gets out of hand it can work against you, but maintaining that balance is imperative to retaining attraction.

    1. I’ve found that as long as you oscillate, you can allow any extremes of emotion. You can show extreme dissatisfaction with the girl, and display intense anger, and genuine brinksmanship over the whole relationship, if you later swing to the other extreme of being supportive and loving and passionate.

      This may seem unmoderated – but that is because we men tend to over-moderate. Girls like extremes. Girls need extremes. Bad dog! Good doggie!

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  5. Oh man, i see so much of my former self in your writings.

    Now excuse me, i have some tall buildings to leap in a single bound.

  6. Pingback: Just Get It «
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  8. From AC/DC’s “What’s Next To The Moon”

    Heavenly body flying ‘cross the sky
    And Superman was out of town
    Come on, honey, gotta change your tune
    ‘Cause it’s a long way down

    Clark Kent looking for a free ride
    Thinking ’bout Lois Lane
    It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s a suicide
    And that’d be a shame

    It’s your love that I want

  9. while this post was hilarious in its own right that batman video in the comments was just pure gold. I thank you Anon123 for that video and further proving batman is the one true master of game in all of superhero history and that nobody not even vaginas F*** with batman.

  10. As a child I always knew being batman was the answer….as a broken 30 year old male attempting to reclaim my lost manhood I once again come to the conclusion being batman is the answer….was my 4 year old self truly smarter than my 30 year old self?

  11. Yes. Yes he was because he didn’t know he was supposed to give a shit and all the ladies loved him for it.

  12. Ohhhh, painful memories….there are times we as men ooze manliness effortlessly and many women who we don’t even know crave that…then, a switch trips, and we want to ‘change’….it’s not easy fighting this after many years of indoctrination. But it’s mind blowing when you unlearn it and get back to basics…

  13. I’ve seen this happen a couple of timers in real life. Two fighter pilots I know got married and their wives immediately started agitating for them to do less dangerous work.

    One ended up a bus driver (cargo planes) and the other grounded. Both wives left them within 10 years.

  14. here’s the deal with women: they want to change you AWAY from the man they were attracted to so that no other woman finds you attractive (in that way).

    but if you lose your identity, she’s not only pussy-ing you up to her wants/desire, she’s disrespecting you for falling for her bullshit (shit test).

    then, she runs-off and gets banged out by a guy that used to be the guy you were. they do this subconsciously and sometimes intentionally.

    do NOT fall for it.

  15. Moral of the story : Never change what attracted her to you. Building a foundation on a woman’s mind is like building your house on quicksand. Do not compromise what YOU know is the best part of yourself.

    Also this whole thing of men wanting to do great things and prove themselves is THE most important thing for a man’s evolution — their drive and passion is linked to it. Taking it away is a mental castration.

    Of course, the female always tries to shit test it by shaming it as a man’s ego (this is actually a manifestation of female ego, and I’d say in a feminine primary society, the female ego is far bigger). The female ego always views the masculine as something broken to be fixed, but always fails as it is short term feeling before long term intelligence.

    Now Lois after some amount of estrogen induced attraction, is thinking in terms of progesterone induced settling down. But these 2 are opposed to each other and in a man’s experience are like the arousal and post-orgasm stages.

    The female ego also has it’s own vested interest in provisioning for itself and her children, but this will come at the cost of dividing her interests between her mate and her children.

    This is so old that certain books on Indian art talk about it — how the women seeing the hero Krishna as their lover alone have a much more intense relationship than the wives who see him as their husband – because their love is divided between their husband and children, and always more for the children. And Krishna is the ultimate plate spinner and chick magnet. Red pill isn’t new, it’s been around all this time — basic human psychology, forgotten by propaganda.

    Nature just made it like that for women — survival and procreation are all that nature’s after and attraction was a means to that end. I guess men evolved with a large sex drive for this reason. We needed to plate spin precisely because of these reasons – the Pareto principle of attraction, and how any amount of betatization works counter to attraction.

  16. Subconciously, Lois tried to decrease Clark’s attractiveness because she needed the beta around for her — nature’s strategy for the feminine is therefore to try and decrease the alpha’s attractiveness to stop a rival, but this comes at the cost of Lois herself losing her attraction for Clark. The female is manipulative, and that means she’s not truthful.

    The strange part of this is that it is all subconscious.

    That’s why frame is so important – knowing who you are, what’s the best of you and what you believe in and what YOU want. If one is very clear about this, one can smell a baseline deviation from a mile away.

  17. @ Sri

    See the Principles of Game:

    #04 – Women fall for who you are but they try to make you something that you’re not.
    A woman falls in love with you for everything that you are. She spends the rest of the relationship trying to change you into everything that you’re not, and when she succeeds she will dump you for the guy who is what you were when she met you. You’ll get left for the guy you used to be even though she’s trying to change you. That’s why you have to set up fake rules for them to break, then they feel good without really breaking your integrity or who you are. When a woman falls in love with you and she’s attracted to you there are things she’s attracted by, don’t change those things, she’s going to ask you to change things that she finds innately attractive. This sounds fucked up because it’s an act of self-sabotage (of the relationship) but the thing is she knows other women find these things about you attractive so she tries to get rid of it so that other women don’t come at you.

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