Year Two


I promise I wont go all blogiversary on you, but Rational Male has just passed the 2 year mark today, so I guess it’s time to do the yearly review.

First of all I want to thank all my readers for making RM the 5th most popular manosphere blog at least according to Vox. And also I’m flattered that my work has drawn more attention to the manosphere in general according to Alexa stats. I don’t generally keep track of web trends – hell, I thought over a million views just prior to year one was nothing special at first – so I was pleasantly surprised to see the numbers Vox tallied up.

In the first year my posts were primarily a more formalized re-telling of the 8-9 years I’d spent on the SoSuave forums, so I entered into year two knowing I would have to start pacing my posts down to well-thought topics and focusing more on crafting the essays on ideas that deserved more time in refining. Initially I felt bad about dropping from 5 posts a week to 1-2 deeper posts a week. I’m always very conscious of repeating prior ideas I’ve covered. I try my best not to go back over something unless I’ve had a new insight about it. Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn’t simply re-hash an old post for the benefit of new readers, but then I that’s what my upcoming book is really for.

Although I don’t participate as often as I wish I could, I would like to recognize the Red Pill Reddit Forum. Again I’m flattered that they promote this blog and my ideas in general as a principle source of red pill info. I’m also impressed by the number of outside the manosphere sites that link to RM. When I see incoming links from comment threads on sites like Forbes or NYT or even sites in India or Australia it’s encouraging to think that red pill awareness is spreading amongst men, and that they’re beginning to get more comfortable in addressing others about it.


A lot’s changed for me personally since January. I was basically made an offer I couldn’t refuse in my career around April and relocated back across the country from Florida. I’ve tried my best not to let this interfere with my essays, and I’m now glad I made the early decision to pare down to 1 or 2 posts a week, but I still wish I had more time to devote to writing. The demands of my new venture (and brands) means having to be much more disciplined about how I budget my time with RM. It’s actually easier when I’m traveling to write more now – it used to be the other way around.

I will still keep RM non-monetized (unless you’d like to donate something to my charity) and my future focus for the blog will continue to be connecting the gender dynamic dots and looking under the hood at how they work. Furthermore, Rational Male will, as always, continue to have unmoderated comment threads. I have always encouraged open discourse – even with those who diametrically oppose my viewpoints – this is the only way ideas can earnestly be tested.

The Book

One other reason my posts have been more limited is due to the book I’ve been compiling for the past 7 months. I’m happy to report that it is now finally finished and I’m presently looking at e-publishing options. I did look into traditional publishing avenues at first, but needless to say most publishers are still firmly rooted in the feminine imperative’s dictates. I expected this, but I figured I’d try it first. The good news is that The Rational Male will be more available as a result. I’m still exploring my self-publishing options and to anyone with a published book (Vox? Roosh?) I’m definitely open to input.

Don’t worry, my first priority is a printed book you can buy and read in your hands. In fact it was the request of one of my readers to publish a book of my essays to give to her son who was in real need of the red pill. I’ve never published a book before, so this is all a new experience for me. The problem I’ve been having with it was really knowing what to leave out than what to put in it.

Finally, I’d like to thank everyone reading for their input and discourse. Most of the best posts I think I’ve developed were the result of conversation threads submitted by readers or from consults I’ve done.  Later this week I’ll be posting my ‘best of’ year two links once I’ve sifted through them.

Thanks for another great year.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

44 comments on “Year Two

  1. Congrats! Love your work and as much as I hate physical books this is the kind of knowledge that should be passed on to friends and family and the easiest way to do that is to say “here, read this book”. Just make sure there’s a Kindle edition for me.

  2. Seriously, thank you for the quality of your writing. Like Victor Pride of BOLD AND DETERMINED you’ve focused on what really matters in life and relationships. “If I Had More Time, I Would Have Written a Shorter Letter” is a quote credited to many, and it’s true. You’ve given your time in each post so it’s simply great stuff. Regarding hardcover or ebook, and ebook is much simpler for affiliates to spread for you. Victor Pride’s 30 Days of Discipline is like a short life’s manual that does for a man that is “A bootcamp of manliness and ass kicking” just like the page says. You should also consider an audiobook version of this. With so many apps available, it’s simple to adjust the reading speed without changing the pitch. Today I was listening to part of an audiobook narrated by voice actor Scott Brick. Every day I have the voice reader app play parts of articles – in the car, in the gym, even while swimming laps (waterproof headphones)… but it’s alwys better with great a great voice actor narrating. If you can afford either, hire Ashton Smith or Sean Caldwell (you’ve heard them before). If not, let me know. Hard cover books can be printed on demand/per order, and I have a friend that had her hardcover book printed for less than $1 per copy. Your site has been a goldmine of counterintuitive wisdom. With the absence of blogger “Solomon” your blog has been one of few resources filled with stuff I forward to friends that are struggling with relationships. Congratulations on this two year milestone.

  3. This site has always been quality over quantity to me. I enjoy the in-your-face shit-show of the Chateau, but I always look forward to your articles and the depth you go into in them.

    Your site is one that I know I can send new guys just discovering the red pill to (or advanced guys looking for a deeper understanding of concepts), and trust that your style of writing and lack of “extra” shit (race, politics, religion, general misogynist rage and bitterness, etc.) will help gently ease them into having their eyes opened further as each article they read hits them in the feels of their own personal experiences.

    Congrats on 2 years and the upcoming book!

  4. Congratulations Rosso! I am from India and you have no clue how this blog has helped improve everything around me. The changes happen in front of you and it is mind blogging for someone like me who feels like a person who just discovered something under the last rug placed.
    Anyway waiting for your book ( Hope there are no payment problems for me ) and the best of 2nd year.

  5. hello rollo, congratulations on hitting year 2. I am a reader from India as well, and I find a lot of your writing and dalrocks to be informative. I’ve been consistently following the rawness as well. In case you need proofreaders/early opinions for your book, please feel free to let me know. I would be happy to assist.

  6. Try Lulu! Both Krauser and Tom Torero published their books through it.
    They take care of everything and it’s quickly shipped worldwide.

  7. Like the mother you mentioned, I want to buy one of these books to give to a family member of mine.

    In this case, my brother who will finish highschool in 2-3 months before entering the big bad world.

    Please don’t delay.

    Congratulations on your blog’s success.

  8. You should hit up Athol Kay and see how he got his book published. Another is Michael Hurst, a local pickup instructor in DC. Both have their stuff available on Amazon too.

  9. @RM – good stuff.

    As for the book, my suggestion is start looking at the threads over at Amazon – because you know you’ll need a Kindle version and that can be done fairly quickly after you have written/edited (also, it’s one of those platforms to do a pre-publish of the book and then “crowdsource” further editing and changes is needed). There are a couple of the self-publishers that will take the Kindle version and just “print it up” – Amazon is amazing from that standpoint.

    Maybe that’s a post – less intra-relationship and more inter-relationship – that success breeds success, how men through working on both their inner and outer game, can achieve almost anything.

  10. This is in now way related to your story, but just saw this profile on one of the dating sites and had to laugh – she is “finding her way back”…

    “… spent the past several years living out of state, focusing on my career, studies, travels, friendships, and fun – everything but a romantic relationship. I recently returned to [redacted] in an attempt to become a settled, stable adult, only to find that seemingly everyone is married with children, which is why I’ve ventured into the online dating world….

    I have an accounting degree from [redacted] and a masters degree in Modern Middle Eastern and North African Studies from the University of Michigan. I just left Los Angeles in March after living and working there the past two years. I also spent a year in New York City before grad school.

    I think developing-world travel is the bees knees. I studied Arabic in Jordan and traveled India by train, which isn’t nearly as romantic as depicted in the movies. Once you encounter a squatty potty on a moving train, you quickly learn the art of strategic dehydration.

    Some general information for you – I like trips of all kinds, boozie brunches, bookstores, cooking, good grammar, funny people, grocery shopping, doggies, fixing up my newly acquired, 75-year-old house, makeup, hair and skin products, and Anthropologie.

    I dislike spiders, snakes, guys who wear jewelry, tattoos, canned vegetables, and ideologues.

    Hopefully you’ll be kind but not a pushover, opinionated but not domineering, smart, funny and armed with a sense of adventure.”

    The wall is a scary thing to face alone.

  11. Will definitely get the book as soon as it comes out. In my estimation your writing voice definitely resonates most strongly with those steeped in ‘blue pill’ perspectives, so I’m sorry to see that no major publishers jumped on board. How many publishers did you ask?

    Did you try Tucker Max’s publisher? Just throwing that out there.

  12. I find rationalmale to be the best red pill site out there.

    There is truth in what Roosh says, but I honestly never want to live the life that Roosh espouses. I don’t want a life of ONS’, I find them empty. I agree with Roosh in that the *ability* to lay a woman is a valid estimate of masculine value, but I have no desire to excercise that muscle to the point of laying women whenever I can.

    There is also value in what the MRA’s say, though I agree with Matt Forney in that they are ridiculously whiny and counter-productive. Still, there is no denying that there is a fundamental legal attack on masculinity, and if MRA’s are the fodder that must be shot out of cannons at those legal battles, so be it.

    There is also value in what the MGTOWs say, though I find them, for the most part, nearly as whiny as the MRAs. They are correct in pointing out that civilization has forsaken the masculine and so society must itself be forsaken. However I find this counterproductive when taken to the extreme form of (“Ghost”). While I find myself preparing to be such a ghost should the SHTF in the civilized world, I recognize that society truly needs men, even though they were shit on.

    In all those sites, I find truth. But what I find is truth in extremes, truth that I have to QUALIFY as I read it because it is not close to a full perspective. However, when I read rationalmale, I almost never need such qualifiers. I don’t because the author takes care to THINK about what he posts, to trim the fat and unnecessary bile that many of the rest of us rant about at times. That’s why this site is so good. It is good because the perspective offered is not skewed so far into the masculine that the only acceptable masculine lifestyle I’m left with is banging women whenever I can, or skewed so far into the bitterness that leaving society entirely is all I can accept, and not so angry as to encourage me towards picking up a stupid crayola’d sign and marching with MRAs much like the stinking feminists of yore.

    Rationalmale is exactly it’s namesake, and that’s why it’s good.

  13. Congrats Rollo.

    I can’t explain how your insight an thoughts have helped me these past couple of years. But, I could go on for days had I not found your work and many others….

    (“She’s Out of your League” was a GREAT movie it was inspiring. All I have to do is just wait an my “10” will notice my safe and non-threating self and just fall all over for me. I just know it…..)

    Yeah. See what I mean? Congrats again man. 3 million plus? Damn.

  14. Thank you for two years of incredibly insightful writing. And a huge thanks for having an unmoderated comment board. To me, that is the litmus test for a mature adult blogger versus a petty child. The move toward censorship, moderation, banning, and blocking comments is lame beyond words. Sites that do that have lost my readership because I don’t want to put effort into making a comment only to find out some sensitive PC douche modded it. I would also note that your comment section has by far the most intelligent conversation of the ‘sphere blogs, and has not devolved into a mess because of lack of censorship. Bravo, keep it up, and I can’t wait to hold your book in my hands.

  15. @Bogart


    You nailed another point I was going to make about comments/commenting and “the discussion” and the value of it. A big thanks to RM for this one – it is a mark of being a real Man/Men – be able to be part of a discussion without devolving it into a “my dick is bigger” argument.

  16. Congratulations! I am a new reader to your blog and I think your perspective on the relationship conflicts is the most reasonable I have ever seen on the Manosphere.

  17. Odd. I figured Dalrock’s site was far more popular than yours Rollo.

    Can’t wait to read your book.


  18. Congrats, Rollo. I consider your voice the most intellectually honest and ecumenically masculine voices in this sector of the interwebs. Which is to say, I highly value the way you elucidate your logic and thought process in laying out the issues.

    I greatly anticipate your book, and, if it’s anything like yoru blog, I believe it will lay a strong philosophical foundation for men’s issues and thought for years to come.



  19. Well done.

    I have to say personally that Rollo’s ‘place’ would be anchored even merely by the way observing peoples’ behaviour reminds me immediately of his various post titles. Heh.

    ‘That’s clearly indignation – crying game – pathologizing the male sexual response – an alpha widow – enter white-knight – h-gamy doesn’t indeed care etc.’ Behaviours not to be taken in a too defaitist or serious way, but still it’s funny to see how these issues and terms manifest themselves every day.

    Awaiting year three. And the book to support your lavish new Californian(?) lifestyle. Hehe.

  20. A Manospherian no-fault divorce lawyer has this to say:

    “As I have said from time to time, all of my bitching about women really applies only to HB8s and above who are bimbos or selfish or evil. They have the easiest life of any mammal on the history of the world at this moment, but are unappreciative of it. I would *not* want to be a short, fat, ugly, average woman in this world. Invisible, just as lacking in sex and affection as beta men are, and not as able to earn an income to support themselves either. The bitching done by bitter men is really directed at HB8s……and there are 40 decent men for every HB8, so it makes sense that 39 out of 40 men are frustrated.”


    [Obvious troll is obvious.]

  21. Congratulations on 2 years of thought provoking content Rollo – Looking forward to your book with great interest!

  22. first i would like to let you know that i love your writing. i think you have great insights and i personally have benefited tangibly from the things i have learned here.

    i would like to point out that although you help many many men become capable of being more deliberate about what they get out of their lives, i personally believe that your adherence to specifically defined terms give a lot of men catch phrases to throw around. i feel a lot of your readers use the ideas discussed here and elsewhere as an excuse for not accepting responsibility for their lot, as a way to point fingers at the wyminz rather than use the tools given freely here to improve themselves and become happier people. and when there are a lot like that new readers fall into it from some sort of sense of community. i know you are already aware of this, and i understand that when someone shares information this is bound to happen and cannot be entirely helped.

    i have begun to dislike the manosphere because of this, although that would not change who i read and why i read them.

    if you need to relax with the writing to pursue personal endeavors i do not think that it would necessarily be a bad thing.

    I will definitely be buying your book. im sure it will be a great read. i look forward to more insight from you.

  23. Keep on writing and I’ll keep on reading. You’ve given me a lot of insight and I really appreciate it.

  24. Congrats Rollo. I’ve got no doubt you’ve positively impacted many mens’ lives. It was your comments that assisted in my unplugging, and for that I am grateful. Keep doing what you are doing. Looking forward to buying the book.

  25. Thanks for making the blog that was my introduction the Manosphere and administered the first doses of the red pill.

  26. I’ll be honest when I say, that I cannot resist needling people when the whimsy takes me; now be that as it may; I must congratulate you Rollo. Your blog always has something interesting to say.

    All the best.



  27. just here to say thanks for two great years. i found the sphere in nov 2011 and just ate up all your early posts. still cant wait for the book. i’m gonna buy a bunch for friends and family.

  28. Rollo,

    I just stumbled onto your blog a week ago. This is the best writing on human nature that I have ever seen. Too often, authenticity and discipline are looked upon as some sort of esoteric, specialized concepts. This blog synthesizes their effect into everyday life in a way that anyone can understand. I have been taking my own, self-deduced dosages of the red pill for the last 5 years and it is rather amazing to see so many of the same conclusions spelled out in a cogent, written manner. You are truly doing God’s work for many men who are unfortunately blind to the reality of our world.

    I am going through a divorce right now, which I initiated earlier this year after putting up with 3 years of my wife turning our home into a battleground in front of our son. While I wanted to leave her earlier, I was wracked by guilt over breaking up the family. However, at some point, I realized that the only thing I truly cared about was living my life in the way that I wanted and was proud of. When the words “I want a divorce…we are done” came, they were not planned. Rather, it was a powerful blaze that erupted from within and when they came out, I stood there, in calm acceptance of what I was doing with no desire to take them back. I woke up the next day and skipped to the office, saying to myself “this is the first day of the rest of your life”. My relationship with my son is now 20x better than before the divorce. The optimism of freedom and knowing that you control your happiness are contagious feelings that make everyone happier. I have not started dating yet (much better to do it after the papers are signed) and that will be a learning experience like anything else. However, dating, like anything else in life, it is just a matter of staying true to oneself and never letting fear or other artificial barriers overtake our senses. All that matters is the subconscious approval of the man you see in the mirror.

    ST in NY

  29. Competition anxiety…the fear of beta’s if polygamy was legal….How do we explain the benefits?

    My wife is pro polygamy, and wants complete submission to me, and I get sex however I want and whenever I want. She made a post about men being designed and programmed to have many women. And women are designed to be with a man that has sexual options.

    We understand that from a PUA standpoint committing to polygamy at all would be ridiculous, simply because:

    if men are getting poon for free now, and it is legal – why would PUA’s pay a HUGE price for poon that is ILLEGAL??

    But say you believe that sex is to be kept within bonds of matrimony – and polygamy became legal in a few years time – how would society look like?

    A man who is not married commented:

    > Mr. Darling, you seem to be confused on the point. Men are programmed to be capable of monogamy. But that doesn’t mean that monogamy isn’t ideal. Jesus was fairly clear in the gospels that the union of a man and a woman was the ideal form. The OT permitted polygamy, it didn’t encourage it. The reason why is because when you have a high male mortality rate, polygamy is necessary to ensure that the birthrate of the “tribe” stays somewhat level. Without polygamy he tribe could disintegrate. For our survival as a species polygamy was necessary to program into men. But that doesn’t mean we should encourage it as a society. In fact, polygamy (while necessary in some circumstances) is pretty much incompatible with advanced civilization, because it locks too many men out of having wives. Without that impulse, men not only will not produce surplus goods for society, but they will probably actively rebel against it.

    This seems to be a common belief though. Is there any rational sense to his belief?

    Could society improve in some ways, and feminism be halted to a certain extent, when women in polygamist marriages will seem to be happier, and children in polygamist marriages would be healthier than children born out of wedlock and in emotionally broken marriages ??
    That would suppose that all parties are loyal, and maybe that would need a strong religious conviction.

    We’d like to explain to the general public that with polygamy, competition anxiety would play a role, and therefore women would in general keep the tingles and want to make it work, since he would in most ways be alpha to her and not need her.

    Healthier marriage, would you not think?

    If you will allow it, we’d love to use your answer as a third party point of view, or let it be a guest post. 🙂

    Strived to find an email? Incase… for next time

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