I Have a Secret

One of my Monday morning rituals is to check out Postsecret and peruse the week’s selection of postcard confessionals. A former co-worker turned me on to the voyeurism of this blog almost 6 years ago now. When I was first introduced to the blog and read each of these confessions (they’re not really secrets if you think about it) what struck me was the consistency and repetitions of certain themes. Granted, Postsecret selects for what’s going on seasonally so you’ll get family confessions around the holidays, sex confessions around Valentine’s Day, and the ubiquitous “my father was a no good sonofabitch” secrets around Father’s Day.

However, it’s during the off weeks, when there is no impending holiday or no important world events (like a mass shooting of innocent children) that the themes and regularity of confession really solidify when you pay attention. I’ve used a select few of these secrets as header pictures for a handful of my posts, but my secret is that I’ve made a habit of keeping tabs on a specific themes of postsecrets this year. So, from the selections I’ve collected below, see if you can figure out my secret themes,..

icheat

itgetsbetter

2ofthem

onback.somysonandfuturebabysharethesameDNA

SIze Matters

happynow

free

lakers

 

untilyoudid

PS3

PS2

PS1

Alpha-Widow1

secret

video

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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Kuraje
Kuraje
9 years ago

Since we’re talking about secrets, this might be an interesting material for a follow-up post / discussion:

Sext Instagram account incites riot
“The Instagram account started when a user put out a call for tips on “sluts” in the area, and promised to keep tipsters anonymous…”
http://arstechnica.com/business/2012/12/sext-instagram-account-incites-riot/

Video of the Girl Trying To Escape:
http://youtu.be/wIHDp1QL5Bc

Lucky White Male
Lucky White Male
9 years ago

Great discussion, but don’t think my main point has been refuted. 1) Main point: A money power status guy almost certainly is also Dark Triad to get where he is in life. Dark Triad means he already has some “Game” going on – that’s assuming he already hasn’t devoured Game by 2013, 11 years after Mystery. Quite impossible since such a guy is at the far end of the ambition spectrum to begin with. 2) How long can we keep hoping that guys with Money Power and Status are somehow social rejects who are otherwise clueless dolts when it comes… Read more »

Titanium
Titanium
9 years ago

YaReally,
If you were a hermit before, I’m guessing you’re an introvert? If so, how did you go from that to being outgoing and social and chatting up strangers?

twan
twan
9 years ago

Rollo. you say don’t let it depress you, which typically I don’t, as I feel empowered by what I’ve learned, even though I still fail my share of shit tests. I’m fully open to all advice and crtique. that said, you say use it to my advantage. do you mean that we know where they’re coming from so we know how to use it against them/to our advantage? fyi I’ve read every post from the year one page at least twice, as well as dalrock, juggler, chateau, private man; m3 etc…so I have no illusions and a fairly good grasp… Read more »

twan
twan
9 years ago

@titanium
ain’t nothin to it but to do it. i sucked at approach. always thought i needed an “in” to start a convo. but just start doing it and it gets easier. like a snowball on a mountain that turns into an avalanche.

YaReally
YaReally
9 years ago

@Martel This part of the seminar talks about merging sets and using pivots and comfort etc, but with MM his view OF pickup is that basically the entire bar is one big set, so Group Theory is sort of mixed into all of his stuff as opposed to just having a very separate “how to shmooze the manager of a bar” section, you know?: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vHP5OTft8uA&t=9m10s I recommend watching all the MM clips (that’s Part 4, I think there’s 5 parts), because a lot of the stuff that works on women, works on men too. Men respond to social proof (lonely… Read more »

Good Luck Chuck
Good Luck Chuck
9 years ago

Status is not difficult to achieve and it doesn’t require becoming a household name for it to have an effect. Practicing game can get you laid. Improving your social status as a whole and banking cash will give you the ability to live life on your terms. Money allows you can enjoy your hobbies, travel, and live wherever you want. Social status makes good things come to you with very little effort. You learned how to talk your want into women’s pants and you think got the key to the universe. There’s a whole other world out there beyond pussy.… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
9 years ago

P.S. One other thing to note about that strategy I wrote up above is that no part of it requires any kind of superhuman magic powers. If you break down what I’m doing through out, literally all I’m doing is causally chatting some people up in a friendly way, getting to know them a bit, and introducing them to eachother. There’s no “oh I could never do that” magic ninja tricks in there. I’m just doing it in a very strategic manner, and applying Game tactics to help out (like comfort to connect with guys, and teasing/kino to flirt with… Read more »

YaReally
YaReally
9 years ago

@Good Luck Chuck

“If your only goal in life is to get laid, then yea, it’s a lot easier to learn game and call it a day.”

Your problem is that you look at Game through a very narrow lens and don’t see the potential in what it can do for the rest of the areas of your life. Think on it. 🙂

FuriousFerret
FuriousFerret
9 years ago

@Good Luck Chuck Your message is to focus on career and money. Career and money mean fuck all today. Women have money and career, they want excitement in men. If you don’t provide that it’s curtains for you. I live in the DMV (DC-Maryland-Virginia) area and everybody has money and career, a lot of young professionals don’t have any quality ass what so ever. If they do have a girlfriend, they are a nagging, bitchy chubby SWPL narcissist. Most of these men have no Game. They are feminized blue pill suckers. Their job and money mean nothing to attractive. They… Read more »

twan
twan
9 years ago

Fellas, I don’t know Chuck from a hole in a slut, but what I interpreted from his posts is that, in waaaaaay more words, he’s just advocating having options. Now it’s entirely possible that I missed something because fuck me if I read every word you guys wrote on my shit ass galaxy s 1. That said, it seems to me that the points you guys are arguing actually run parallel to each other. completely random: I work in intelligence and when girls ask me to explain, and I tell them I can’t, I can actually hear the tingles. Discuss.… Read more »

FuriousFerret
FuriousFerret
9 years ago

@Twan

I think it’s my own personal environment that influences my view. Everybody has some type of fancy job with money, so status is just kind of ‘meh’ to me and most importantly women.

Now true Game and how to use it. Just the social dynamics in general and how to manipulate an environment, that my friend is a true eye opener. As killing off the equalitarian liberal menality and adopting a go for broke alpha don’t give a fuck, crash and burn mindset that’s heady stuff for me. That’s what intrigues me.

Titanium
Titanium
9 years ago

YaReally,
Thanks for the reply. I hear ya on breaking through the comfort zone. So how long did it take from to go from pre-PUA to now? You’re talking merging sets, pivots, etc. which is advanced-level PUA.

YaReally
YaReally
9 years ago

@Titanium I was a pretty hardcase fuckup. A lot of my first year or so was just fixing up my social akwardness lol I got laid a bunch that year because I executed Game like the literature told me to, but I was completely flying by the seat of my pants “fake it till you make it” style. There were a lot of “omg I can’t believe this is working, omg I can’t believe we’re having sex” etc. moments that year lol I would spend all my free time all week long reading about Game and then all weekend applying… Read more »

T.Jr
T.Jr
9 years ago

I’ve made a few new friends recently, which i consider to be lesser alphas and have been trying to explain female solipsism and social conventions very carefully and intelligently to them and its funny to see how their responses of general shock of truth and agreeableness is always the same. As if i magically put into words all their convoluted thoughts about women before them. many of them probably too afraid to let themselves think certain thoughts that they KNOW they would be immediately branded as a mysoginist for….even by other men…. thats what i think this post is about.… Read more »

muscleman
9 years ago

The only theme: sneaky, sneaky hypergamy.

Glengarry
Glengarry
9 years ago

“With the iPhone you can send text messages using the Apple iMessage, which goes through Apple servers not the cell company servers. … All that is gone with the iPhone. No paper trail for cheaters.” Endearingly naive. All your texting is saved for the purposes of law and order and all that, and Apple won’t stand up to the NSA, FBI or whoever else. Was Petraeus that long ago? … Apple probably also keep that shit forever for their own purposes, just like they track your location and save the trail for a rainy day. So that’s how modern life… Read more »

Glengarry
Glengarry
9 years ago

“From experience, I’ve learned that women will definitely pay attention when you have a position of power and money. They just won’t necessarily sleep with you. Anyone can take a woman on an expensive vacation or buy her things. Closing the deal is a different matter.”

Testify, especially if we’re talking winning competitions or status of some sort. It’s basically lead gen, stretching into unusual places. However, closing can be easier than you’d expect too, particularly if you came up from hard times … Social proof, it’s a hell of a drug.

Glengarry
Glengarry
9 years ago

That swedish riot was a laff, by the way. The fear of judgement is powerful, we should learn to use it.

BC (@BonusCoverage)
9 years ago

I see four themes: cheating, man poaching, maternity fraud, and paternity fraud. Am I right Rollo??

Keanu
9 years ago

HuffPost brings an interesting secret mainstream. A married woman confesses she has a ‘boyfriend’ and it just kind of ‘happened.’ According to the authoress, the issue at hand is not “should we judge this woman, but ‘should she tell her husband?’

http://thestir.cafemom.com/love_sex/148635/sex_confession_i_have_a

And the rabbit hole keeps going down.

ithinklifeistooshort
9 years ago

I’m actually a huge fan of post secrets.
It allows me to realize how much I shouldn’t trust people

Mark
Mark
8 years ago

Hi Rollo, excuse the necro-post, but if you really wanna wrap your canoodle around some craziness, check this site out: http://twitter.com/tinderfessions

Post Secret is tame compared to tinderfessions.

trackback

[…] Basically, Sandberg suggests that women should have sex with men they’re physically attracted to, and then “settle down” with boring guy who will buy the house and faithfully go to work everyday. The same guy who gets cheated on all the time. […]

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