I really hate it when I come up with a decent blog comment that gets buried amongst 700+ more self-evincing posts and trails off into the internet ether. Such was the case over at Aunt Susan’s (once again). Use a topic like Guys Acting Like Jerks to get into a Relationship on a “Blog Her” site that women feel relatively more comfortable posting on than Jizzabel and you’re going to get a shit load of comments. Just as an aside, is anyone really surprised that it’s now women receiving public recognition for acknowledging psychological and sociological principles and dynamics that the manosphere has covered (via Game) for over a decade now?
So, guys acting like jerks to get into a relationship? Ladies, get used to the idea that the guy who you’d consider for a monogamous relationship is going to at least start off with asserting his pseudo-jerk cred. This is the logical reaction for a guy who’s been so consistently flaked on using the Nice Guy route that he fearlessly experimented with the Jerk energy and was more consistently rewarded with your intimacy and attention. And gentlemen, get used to more flakes, it’s a symbiotic self-perpetuating dynamic.
I really don’t see how this is at all shocking to anyone, women get the men they create. I think Roosh pretty well summed up this dynamic in the Future of Game:
Flaking Will Reach Epidemic Proportions
Western culture is teaching youth to glance upon the field and carefully analyze all available options before making a decision, or simply not make a decision at all. Therefore dates scheduled more than a day in advance will be rare. There will be no concept of keeping your word, being honorable, showing up, or acting respectful. Everyone will be looking out for their own. Whereas for night game in the past you had to make out with a girl to decrease the chances she’ll flake, today you have to fuck her. That’s right—to get a first date you have to already have had the one-night stand with her. This is the only way I’ve found that decreases flaking to an acceptable level in even today’s climate. If I only made out with the girl, or god forbid didn’t even kiss her, the odds I will see her again are far from assured. The dirty truth of game is how often flaking occurs, and it will happen at such a frustrating level that I’m certain more men will turn into homosexuals or resort to sex dolls because of it. This feature alone will cut the game careers short of many men who simply can’t handle the frustration and rejection. You’ll have to really want it to succeed.
Bear in mind that Roosh is prognosticating all this based on current trends and foreseeable outcomes. What I thought was interesting was the idea that even if you’re kiss closing upon your first encounter, odds are still better than half that a woman will flake for even a first date (adjust for demography accordingly). Only an F-Close really locks down a first date, and this is becoming the norm as it is now.
I’d like to consider that there’d be a few mitigating factors for flaking as have been mentioned already – the age / maturity level of a woman, differing social / sexual value of a potential mate, geographic regions and the social interactions that characterize them, but on a whole these are outliers. Generally men and women are going to be looking for as ideal a situation as their conditions permit, yet in spite of these outliers women still default to flaking on guys as commonplace. At least commonplace enough that it’s an increasingly reoccurring complaint for men.
Stoically walking away or NEXTing a flake isn’t enough. You’re not going to teach a flake a lesson when she has 6 more guys lined up (or at least she thinks she does courtesy of socia media) and all perfectly willing to put up with her flakiness if they think it means they have a shot at fucking her.
What I also thought was interesting was the 1st night lay = non-flake first date proposition. This doesn’t sit well with AFCs & White Knights because a 1st night lay or an ONS is too foreign an idea for most of them. However, now the prediction is for this to be a matter of course to GET a first date.
“Rollo, I’m sick of all these flaky attention whores, how do I reduce their flakiness?” – fuck her the night you meet her!
Now take all that to the extreme as Roosh has done, even insisting that if he kiss closes on the first meeting, odds are she’ll flake, and you can see the tears of desperation welling up in the eyes of AFCs and lower SMV women who thinking they bear the brunt of their sister’s cruelty. The bar just got set even higher for chumps everywhere as they were beginning to think Game could be their panacea.
As technology expands (social networking for example) women are finding new avenues to satisfy their attention cravings. They’re vicariously living more and more in the virtual than the actual, and finding an ability to really connect becomes blurred. In the future, Game is going to have to develop ways to break into that blurring and leave a lasting impression in the “real world”. Depending upon the circumstances, a first night lay should leave a lasting impression, but this illustrates the bigger point in that women are becoming increasingly less receptive and responsive to anything less than a sufficiently immediate shock to their dulling sensibilities. A woman outright flaking on a guy is now met with no more concern than if she’d unfriended or put someone on ignore on Face Book. That’s the association now, while at the same time she’s receiving positive reinforcement from any number of virtual sources online.