That Damn Dog!

From my real-life friend Good Luck Chuck:

“Is it just me, or does anyone else get seriously annoyed with women and their dogs?

It’s NAUSEATING how they treat these annoying fucking overgrown rats.

Spend the night at a chicks house and even if she’s kind enough to close the bedroom door behind her leaving little Dolce in the living room inevitably every hour on the hour some leaves rustle outside the front door or the compressor on the fridge makes a noise and “killer” has to start yapping his little head off.

I was out with some friends tonite, one of them was a girl I dated a couple of times awhile back. Not like we didn’t have anything INTERESTING to talk about, but the conversation veers toward her new sh!tzu puppy. She’s SOOOO proud of her baby! He learned how to climb up AND down the stairs, and he’s now potty trained! YAY!

As if that weren’t enough, the blackberry comes out and we have to look at pictures of her adorable little “child”. Isn’t he cute with the little bow in his hair? AWWWWWW!!!!!

Christ…..these chicks wonder why they can’t find a man who will stick around? It isn’t bad enough that they want to be a MAN themselves in everyday life, but then they want to come home and play mommy to a 10 pound mop that has to be walked every few hours and leaves “surprises” on the floor every couple of weeks.

I was recently talking with a friend about the absoulte psychotic mess the girl I used to date in my 20’s, and I got to recalling some of the more annoying aspects of that miserable relationship. One of the most aggravating things I found myself wrapped up in was her obsession over this little Westhighland Terrier she had. I hated that fucking animal; and I don’t mean your garden variety hate, but the how Satan-hates-God kind of hate.

Even after 17 years of having put this mess well behind me, I still get a violent twitch in my eye whenever I see someone walking a dog like this.

Now you’re probably wondering why I have such contempt for this otherwise innocent and cute little breed of dog. It’s not that I dislike Westies per se, but it was her insane, psychotic devotion to this pet that she would lavish on it in preference to paying attention to me or even her friends at times.

When I was finishing my degree I did a bit of research to see if this phenomenon had a psychological parallel and interestingly enough it does. I got to thinking about all of the people I knew who gratuitiously and excessively spent inordinate amounts of time and money on the wellbeing of their pets. These were universally women – I can’t think of one unattached, single man I know who even has a dog, much less gets up early to drop it off at ‘doggie daycare’ on his way to work and picks it up on his way home. Neither do I know a man who would spend the kind of money ‘gourmet dog biscuits’ command from a store dedicated to nothing else, nor a guy who would buy ‘Frosty Paws’ dog ice cream treats, but I do know women who will. I know women who will spend $1,500 for their “little precious'” to spend a day at the doggie spa. I know women who will pamper and coddle thier pet even after it shits diarrea on the living room carpet and in the same breath berate their husbands for leaving the toilet seat up.

However it’s not just the degree to which some women will go in their devotion to their pets, it’s the indifference they display toward the human beings of importance in their lives, in preference to their pets, that crosses the line. There is a current field of study in this psychological transference of emotion to pets. Nothing terribly conclusive has been set in stone of course, but the theory goes something like this; People (mainly female) having a tendency to dote exhorbitantly over their pets also tend to eschew meaningful interactions with significant people in their lives. It goes on to say that the pet becomes a ‘self-proving’ device that enables the individual to internalize that they are capable of loving while minimizing their own reciprocation of affection to another human being.

In otherwords when she sits there with little Pookie and dotes over him rather than engaging you in even limited communication or affection it may be indicative of a more complex problem – a definite red flag to be sure. Of the examples of women’s behavior I used in this essay, all of them were in some unsatisfying relationship that they were uncomfortable discussing yet would do nothing about. However, when prompted with conversation about thier pets they were always very talkative.

So what does this mean to the Game-aware then? Beware. Part of an accomodating AFC nature is a disingenuous desire to identify with a woman in order to barter his identity for her intimacy. Nothing will bring a guy down faster than allowing this pet devotion dynamic to become a part of this identification.


Disclaimer: I love dogs, I do not hate them. I own three purebred racing greyhounds and I foster and recondition retired and active track dogs. I do not dress them in stupid costumes, nor do they sleep on canopy beds. I have more respect for them than to subject them to that and they are expensive enough to keep healthy under normal circumstances. That is all.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

30 comments on “That Damn Dog!

  1. I love dogs, too, but I will not LTR a gal who has one — small yip yip, large hunter breeds, in between, doesn’t matter.

    It has nothing to do with jealousy over the dog getting the attention, it has to do with the fact that I have yet to meet a gal of medium-to-high sexual market value who treats their dogs with the respect deserved. The minute I see that she coops a dog or dogs up for 8 hours or more per day, never takes them to the dog parks or dog beaches, doesn’t feed them right, and doesn’t give them socializing that’s necessary for calm demeanor or dog training to make them calm and well behaved — she’s out. I lose all respect for her.

    It’s one of my “first date” questions that separate the LTR possibilities from the FWBs — “What do you think of dogs as pets?” If she says she has one, she’s relegated to FWB, if that, and that’s only if she can find a way to my place, because I sure as hell don’t want to see her interact with her dog.

    Again, I love dogs (don’t own them myself, too busy, no big yard, etc), but I can’t stand women dog owners.

    The one time I met a gal who was a great dog owner was when I was consulting 100 miles from an urban district and she had 12 acres of land and owned her own feed store in the boonies. She treated her dogs with respect and they were amazing animals, but no chance in hell would I try to LTR someone who lives 2 hours drive from me.

    Great post as usual, RT.

  2. Undeniably true, but what’s gone unaddressed here is WHY these pet owners are invariably women (or gay men).

    This Pookie Dynamic strikes me, in all circumstances, as a deep-rooted need to mother a child.

    Takeaway: Don’t play mommy to her baby.

    1. … as a deep-rooted need to mother a child. ….

      A child who will not grow up, develop its own mind, demand increasingly adult conversations, thus forcing her to grow up.

  3. I wonder how many of the chicks who drop their dog off at doggie day-care before work and pick them up after, actually have children??

    I’ll bet NONE of them.

    I wonder how many pets exist for hamster-assistance purposes for childless carousel riders…

  4. People displaying excessive devotion to animals are not so subtly showing their contempt for humans (who they’re unable to form relationships with). They’re not actually animal lovers, they’re neurotic.

  5. “… the pet becomes a ‘self-proving’ device …”

    Interesting and likely true, rather like a little girl’s doll, only with more complex needs and responses. Not as complex as a human of course, and easier to dispose of when she tires of its “needs.” In the meantime, she gets to be “God.” Very flattering, and not something that should be reinforced.

  6. I’ve been around girls and dogs. Not quite so cut and dried for me. If she’s got the house with the yard and the dog is definitely an outside dog, not so bad. Especially if she has two of them, then she understands to some extent how dogs socialize. But the dogs must sleep outside or be restricted to the kitchen at night.

    If she’s got one of those little yappers that stay indoors, that’s FWB material. If she allows any size dog to sleep on her bed or at least in her bedroom, that is major, major DLV to me and I may not even do FWB as I really dislike dogs in my bedroom let alone on my bed.

  7. I’ve known plenty of single men with dogs – they tend to be older, with drug problems or just general health issues. My guess is that they don’t have many friends and dogs are good company. I’ve read pets can be stress-reducing, and are even used in therapy. But none of these men dressed their dogs in silly costumes.

  8. Agreed. There’s a transference of maternal instincts towards pets, which goes on hand with isolation from human beings.

    My ex was (is) a dog trainer. Her whole circuit is filled by ladies who love their dogs too much and their fellow humans too little, including the bf.

  9. “Part of an accomodating AFC nature is a
    disingenuous desire to identify with a woman in
    order to barter his identity for her intimacy.”

    Brilliantly put! That’s my nugget for the day…

  10. Probably a substitute for the children they will likely never have.

    Sad, in a way.

    Which does not excuse neglect, of course. The transference of emotion thing makes plenty of sense. Isn’t that the same mechanism that causes women to transfer all emotion to their babies and toddlers and completely neglect the man who is working to pay for it all, but is treated as junior management within his own household?

    “Not tonight dear, the baby is restless.”

  11. Good insight. Another thing is that these dog (and cat) owning single women do not show the dominance necessary to be the pack leader. The dog ends up leading and training the single woman. These women dote on their “fur babies” just like many women dote on their children while relegating a husband to child status.

  12. I don’t even remember which chick I was talking about when I wrote that. This could apply to half of the women I have met over the past several years.

    One pair of sisters I know is particularly bad. Every other facebook picture is a dog pic. They just started a business making cute shit for dogs. They take their dogs everywhere. EVERYWHERE. Bumped into them one night in New Orleans awhile back and they had to get back to their hotel early to take care of their dogs. I had messed around with one of them in the past and would have liked to have sealed the deal. What a boner killer. I don’t know them well enough to know how they feel about their dating life but I would imagine it’s pretty bleak. They are both attractive but neither one has had a boyfriend the several years I have known them (that I am aware of).

    Stuff like this sickens me. Kind of like watching an otherwise attractive female cop barking orders at a criminal or a “normal” chick getting excited about the Green Bay Packers. It puts a damper on the sexual vibe but it COMPLETELY DESTROYS any desire I have to bond with a woman. Obviously chicks don’t realize this but when we see stuff like this it gives us a really good idea of what kind of a wife and mother they are going to be, and it isn’t good.

    Ladies- there is a fine line between having a healthy relationship with your pet and being an obsessive psychopath. It is perfectly ok to post a cute pic of your dog on facebook once in awhile. It is even ok to mention your pet in conversation (in passing). It is NOT of to have more pictures of animals than people on your facebook page. It is NOT ok to mention your pet(s) more than once or twice in any given conversation. And it is DEFINITELY NOT OK to share ice cream with your dog or allow it to french kiss you while we are sitting on your couch watching a dvd. If you have trouble imagining how it feels for us to watch your dog spread fecal germs all over your face just picture your man as a mammas boy who hugs and kisses his sisters inappropriately and that will give you a rough idea.

    1. Not only would my older sister (mid 30’s) let her dog lick her face and mouth put would often share her food with the dog, i’m talkin make a bigger plate of food for the both of them.

      Not surprisingly she started to get bumps on her face.
      I was shocked she didn’t get something worse seeing as how most of the dog’s teeth were falling out and had to be removed cause she mostly fed it human food.

  13. Also, they should leave the pet pics off their online dating profiles.

    Along with the pic of them at the bar with their much hotter friends, I might add.

  14. I once met a woman who was a PhD – in Social Psychology – Absolutely gorgeous in a “eclectic hippie chick” kind of way. She was at a friend’s Thanksgiving party, and had a dog that looked a lot like the one in that picture, except that it was dressed in a miniature pilgrim’s outfit.. complete with hat..

    The dog’s name was “Thurston Howell the Third”.

    I’m not kidding.

  15. On a forum some local folks were babbling about pet abuse.

    Long story short, I accused one silly bitch of holding dog life above human life. She responded with typical female lack of logic.

    I responded, pointing out her many contradictions. She got angrier as each barb hit home, and then she admitted that yes, she did value the life of her dogs (and most dogs) above that of humans.

    She then reverted to calling me a racist, bigot, women hater, etc…

  16. Truth is stranger than fiction….

    Today these crazy bitches were posting about how excited they were for their doggy easter egg hunt. Really? You wanna talk about “issues”, this is the definition right here. The saddest thing is the younger sister is mid 20’s and the older sister is early 30’s. where will these two be in ten years?

    Oh, and another woman I know has facebook profiles for her cats. Yes, her CATS. A younger mutual female friend of ours is the epitome of a modern, independent cock carousel rider. She absolutely idolizes this older career woman who created facebook pages for her “children”. The younger girl is early 30’s and rapidly approaching The Wall. I wonder how long it is going to be before she turns to animals to try to fill that big ass hole she has been digging herself into?

  17. Hey Dogs, don’t blame the dogs/pets. The dogs aren’t the ones dressing themselves up. I would not dress pets up or take them to day care. If someone has a pet and they are traveling then they have to have someone else feed them or put them in a shelter until they get back because that’s how it is. I used to hate all pets for years. Now I have gotten to like some pets and I may someday get a pet. While I understand the extreme cases mentioned, I disagree that every person who has a pet is extreme like this. I think it’s acceptable for a normal man or woman to have pet(s) and continue to be normal. Many people (a bunch of women) are not normal in the head though, and it does seem like they make it into a parent/child bond instead of just a pet (that would be normal). When I was in elementary school I heard a boy say to others that he did something to an animal that is way more disgusting than any of this. Many women are incapable of giving/receiving affection due to her parents (father), or she views all men as jerks who treat her like sh*t (and this can be true) who are just using her for s*x (can be true such as the guys who pump and dump), therefore pets are SAFE (not going to hurt her) so she rewards this pet with her affection like a live teddy-bear (mostly for her own benefit of feeling secure and feeling better herself). This would logically make sense to me. As a straight man I would not kiss a pet (a different species) nor would I kiss a man (same gender) and I find it outrageouly gross when people let animals lick their face/lips (I’ve never knowingly kissed a woman who let this happen, and it probably would be a deal-breaker if she intentionally did this as I likely would say see ya). I saw a well-known model the other day who let a huge dog lick her face and I did think that was mentally not right. I can give affection to women in the sense of treating them well, but I do not even want affection from any woman. Needy guys need affection and affection plus kids may be why marriage costs so much. Maybe divorce also costs so much because it is reimbursing her (after the fact years later) for her decreased SMV. I met a girl last month with the opener “What kind of dog is that,” so I don’t have an issue with dogs/pets, and I’m not an AFC when out in the field either, I naturally can do what some other Game bloggers say and that’s to start Openers with any type of props in the environment or about anything in the current situation. I’m not even going to play house or be an ATM by living with a girls, so I don’t even care if she has pets or not.

  18. replace “pet/dog” with “children” and you get the frustration some married men have with their wives.

    I love my kids and don’t begrudge them a moment of their time with mom, but my wife has a meaningful relationship with them in place of dad.

  19. Amen to this. I too dated a messed up woman years ago, who lived alone with her stupid, stupid cocker spaniel. This dog was a male but peed like a female; I know because it pissed everywhere, inside and out. She’d bring it to the office, and every time she left for just five minutes it whined and paced like it was having a nervous breakdown. Clearly she had babied it to the point that it could not deal with her being away. (I know all dogs are like this to a degree, but this was off the charts.) It also barked uncontrollably every time she walked it, at everything and nothing. And it humped everything. All I needed to do was wrap my arms around her and the dog got horny and humped the sofa. One time it tried to hump me as I was about to hump her. I reeled in as much of my anger as I could and kicked it off the bed. Stupid motherfucker.

    Of course, it wasn’t the dog’s fault that it was raised to be this way. It could have been disciplined and treated like a regular dog. What I think I truly hated was that the dog was male but had been thoroughly feminized and emasculated (neutering notwithstanding). It was like she had taken a piece of mold and sculpted the perfect little wussified beta male, forever dependent on her and willing to love her unconditionally despite the fact that she had very few redeeming qualities (hey, she was hot – it didn’t last long). It was a true lap dog. Women like her do their best to work over human males as lap dogs, but they know deep down they risk some kind of backlash – either anger, resentment, or an inconvenient crush followed by an awkward LJBF conversation. Give a crazy woman a (usually male) puppy and she gets to play God, creating her own disturbing fantasy of how she perceives men should treat her.

  20. ANY woman spending $1,500 for their “little precious’” to spend a day at the doggie spa is fucked-up. Women are cheap. So, the only way she’d spend that kind of cash is if some guy is giving money to her. Any male that does that is a dipshit. Guys gaming a vapid girl belonging to said guy better bring more than “game.”

  21. in the mountain-side village where i came from, we eat them
    my grandfather thought me how to skin one

    i always tell that story to women who hover around me
    jaw drops and twinkle eyes, dear sirs

  22. And young men of the west flock to dog-eating nations for level-headed, feminine women, and produce superior, mix-race, dog-eating babies. Amen.

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