Lessons for my Son

Lessons

As many of my readers know Mrs. Tomassi and I are raising a daughter. We had one child by design, and in all honesty I’m rather relieved it was a girl. Take this however you’d like, but I think raising a girl has allowed me more insight into how women grow and mature into young women, and it’s been through this experience that I’ve based more than a few of my theories on.

I have one younger brother, so the maturation process of growing up female was something I’ve never been familiar with until the past 15 years. I suppose the possibility exists that I may at some point be able to pass on my Red Pill wisdom to a future grandson, certainly my brother’s son, and many older male relatives, however I don’t really have any regrets since I’ve had more private messages and consult requests (I do read all of them) from the sons I never had.

One of the best compliments I get from Red Pill fathers is when they email me about how they’ve bought an extra copy of The Rational Male that they plan to give to their sons or some other male relative. Nothing encourages me to keep writing than the stories I receive like this – this is why I published the book.

So it was with some admitted pride that I came across this post on the Red Pill reddit forum. Testerod brings an  insightful list of points he plans to teach his son(s). I may at some point write a list like this for my daughter, but I thought this was good enough for a standalone post that might inspire some discussion over the weekend.

I came to RP late in life, and looking back on my 45 years, I now see that my path to happiness as an adult could have been much smoother had I known and internalized RP truths as an adolescent… Looking back on my relationships over the years, I can now see as clear as day that when I was successful it was because I was in an alpha frame… When I crashed and burned, it’s because I demonstrated beta behaviors.

My dad never really gave me the sex talk growing up. His abbreviated version of it was “I don’t care who you do, just don’t do it under my roof.” Marginally helpful maybe, but I could have avoided lots of crashing and burning had he given me some version of what I lay out below.

It’s still too early for the sex talk with my own son, but I want to be fully prepped at the right time to share as many RP truths with my son. In fact, I think it’s probably one of the most important things I can do to prepare him for manhood.

So, I wanted to pose the questions: A) What is the appropriate age to have “the talk” with my son? I’m currently thinking around the age when he starts becoming interested in girls (13-14). B) Would love to get your thoughts on some bulleted wisdom to share with him at the right time. Here’s some ideas I’ve been thinking about sharing:

  1. (13 & up) Whatever you do, don’t settle for one girl (oneitis) until much later in life. Play the field, spin plates, date lots of girls. This is the only way you’ll be able to separate the wheat from the chaff and realize what you really want in an LTR relationship down the road if/when you want a family.
  2. (13 & up) Your physical characteristics matter (looks, body type, etc.)… An alpha attitude matters more.
  3. (13 & up) Don’t chase. Be aloof. Let girls come to you. If you do pursue, do it in a carefully calculated way: Pursue and retreat. Push and pull.
  4. (13 & up) Keep her constantly guessing. Always let her know that you have options.
  5. (13 & up) Texting, phone calls, etc… Be disciplined in your response. Use the 1-3 ratio in responding to her texts, phone calls. Give her one short text response/phone conversation for every three she gives you.
  6. (13 & up) Define your mission and pursue it (not girls) passionately. Admittedly, this will be undefined and in flux for an adolescent, but whether it’s sports, studies, extracurricular activities, make those your first priority.
  7. (13 & up)Develop a keen understanding of the psychological/biological nature of women… Understand how girls think. They are ALWAYS looking to upgrade. If you’re not always the “best in show”, they WILL cheat on you find someone else.
  8. (13 & up) Nice guys finish last. There’s a reason all the girls like the boy who (good naturedly) teases them.
  9. (17 & up) Niceness will never get you laid, but will put you forever in the friend zone and give you a terrible case of blue balls.
  10. (17 & up) Be a leader in every relationship. If you’re on a date, make sure you’re doing something that YOU want to do. She can come along for the ride.
  11. (17 & up) Understand shit tests and learn to master them. Girls will always be qualifying you to make sure you’re the alpha male she wants you to be. If you start getting a lot of shit tests, re-evaluate your frame — you’re probably coming across as too needy.
  12. (17 & up) Understand female physiology and how to bring a woman to orgasm.
  13. (17 & up) Girls are the gatekeepers to sex. Men are the gatekeepers to relationships. Never forget this and be stingy as hell with your relationships.
  14. (17 & up) Girls will love you, but only opportunistically. If you demonstrate lower value (DLV), their love for you will evaporate.
  15. (17 & up) Show your beta traits occasionally, but use extreme caution when dong so. Girls will want to see that you are stoic, self-reliant, and confident. If you want a shoulder to cry on, get a dog. Use beta comfort only as a reward for good behavior.
  16. (17 & up)Be dominant in the relationship, in your life, and in the bedroom.
  17. (17 & up)Smile less, smirk more.
  18. (13 & up) Tease relentlessly.
  19. (17 & up) Learn what style of game works best for you: Are you the extroverted “cocky-funny” type? Are you the introverted “aloof-amused mastery type?” Are you the asshole type?
  20. (13 & up) Stay away from online porn.
  21. (13 & up) As an adolescent, you will be consumed with thoughts of sex. Fapping is inevitable. Don’t overdo it though. Control your masculine energy so that it can be harnessed outwardly instead of inwardly in the realm of fantasy.
  22. (17 & up) Realize that the build up of testosterone is what gives you your masculine energy. Don’t fap as a crutch to avoid meaningful interactions with real women. That guy who sits in his basement fapping to online porn all day? Don’t be that guy. Women are repulsed by him because his masculine energy is depleted and he has not learned to focus that energy on real women.
  23. (17 & up) Embrace the fact that men have huge sexual appetites. Never be ashamed of this and fully appreciate your masculine sexuality.
  24. (17 & up) Understand a female menstrual cycle and what it means for them, and more importantly for you (e.g. up the alpha during ovulation, throw in some beta during shark week.)
  25. (17 & up) Understand that for females, sexual arousal typically takes place in the brain and that they are less visually aroused than you are.
  26. (17 & up) Make sure that your sexual market rank is at least 1-2 points above hers at all times. This can be done either with attitude, physical fitness, your life passion or some combination of the above.
  27. (13 & up) Learn not to fear rejection. In game as in life, failure is the best teaching tool there is.
  28. (17 & up) Approach and open often. The more girls you talk to, the more you’ll refine your specific style and what works for you.
  29. (13 & up) Don’t think doing nice things for girls (giving them flowers, valentines, carrying their books, etc.) will make them like you more. It won’t. But they will swoon over you if you’re a fully complete, self-confident, at ease individual in your own right.
  30. (13 & up) Adolescence sucks. You will likely be filled with insecurities, you’ll be self-conscious, you’ll think you look like a goof, you’ll say dumb things to girls and then obsess about it. It’s only temporary… You’re learning and practicing the skills to be a man and there will be failures and mistakes. Always remember that everyone of your peers is going through the exact same thing.
  31. (17 & up) Push boundaries, take risks and be exciting… Even when you’re scared shitless. There’s nothing sexier to a woman than a man who is unafraid to embrace challenges.
  32. (13 & up) Don’t EVER BE A DOORMAT. The minute a girl disrespects you call her on it. And if she continues to disrespect you “next” her immediately no matter how emotionally difficult it is. This is absolutely critical to build your long term self-respect/self-confidence.

Admittedly, the list isn’t exhaustive, but interested in your thoughts and what else I’m leaving out.

If you cannot teach your son positive masculinity, the Feminine Imperative and a fem-centric world will tech him its version of masculinity.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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qqquietone
Guest

Fantastic. At first glance this seems to be a great foundation. My son just turned 14 and I’ve formulating a similar list to teach him real soon.
I’ve been working with him on some simple concepts like frame, self improvement, etc. so far but nothing to complex.

Pluviophile
Guest
Pluviophile

Excellent. Makes me want to make a son.

Underdog
Guest
Underdog

LONEWOLF AND CUB!!!

I bow to you, Rollo-san.

Underdog
Guest
Underdog

I also like the last article very much. It is true, when game is internalized, YOU become the center point of your being. Your needs is the only thing you answer to. Your judgement is the only force affecting your decisions. This is how one can walk up to a girl on the middle of the dance floor, stop her, look her dead in the eyes, and tell her his intentions without fear of rejection. This is what women mean when they say “be yourself”. This is what women mean when they say they want “honesty”. They simply want a… Read more »

Jeremy
Guest

I really think more effort should be made for these sorts of things to be taught to the young. I think his list is a little long, it could use some consolidation, more philosophy, and perhaps some good quotes from some of the more famous masculine males in history. I got none of this as a kid. In fact, I was left to model my own behavior on what the blue pill expected of me, as told to me by the teenage girls around me. The result is, as always, some kind of stoic white knight doormat. I would imagine… Read more »

Sarah's Daughter
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Sarah's Daughter

Sharing this with my son, thank you for this post!

Kingsley
Guest
Kingsley

There’s the 10 Commandments and now there’s the Man Commandments.

123wer
Guest
123wer

MOST important……read the theory and then PRACTICE..because theory is only useful if you applie it …true wisdom comes from experience.

Artisanal Toad
Guest

Well done, Rollo. The future generation has to start somewhere.

Charlotte
Guest
Charlotte

I’m due to have my first son next week, and I’m planning to raise him on the red pill right from birth. I’m grateful there is a growing number of resources available to help me with that, and I’m glad there’s increasing awareness of red pill knowledge in the mainstream. I’m optimistic that in ten years’ time, much of what is talked about in the manosphere won’t be shocking or new to the average person anymore.

David AndersenD
Guest

So how does a red pill man raise a daughter?

Joe Blow
Guest
Joe Blow

Never be afraid to walk if it’s not a perfect fit. It will hurt for a while, but “settling” for a marriage or LTR that doesn’t make you happy in all ways – physically, emotionally, spiritually – will make you hurt forever.

RG3
Guest

Raising daughters: read “Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters”

Keith
Guest
Keith

In a nutshell, just how to do it.

DeNihilist
Guest
DeNihilist

I never discussed this shit with my boys. Just raised them with high demands and expectations. Other parents quite often thought that I was too strict with them. They were able to make their own breakfast and lunches by 8, do their laundry by 9, and cook themselves and the wife and I dinner by 12. The standing joke throughout high school and now into Uni, was if they came home with less then 100%, I would immediately ask where the other percentage points were. Always demanding more. By the standards of maleness used to describe males in these manosphere… Read more »

socratezonline
Guest

I would teach my son to not care about girls, and focus on building businesses instead. Being an entrepreneur builds personality, creates true independence, and gives you enough time to find a decent woman while you’re living your dream.

Eris
Guest
Eris

Great topic, article – and picture. This is a subject I have mulled over myself quite a bit. Points like 1, 6 and 30 and 31 would be ones I would teach my son early on – ideas on how and what it means to be a man and not to feel ashamed of his masculinity despite a culture that attempts to demonise it. Regarding ideas like hypergamy, one-itis and concepts contained in the 48 laws, as revelatory as they are, I would wait until he experienced his own difficulties or began to raise questions himself about the nature of… Read more »

Glenn
Guest
Glenn

The female imperative and femcentric view of everything is imposed on boys starts very young. I just spent an afternoon caring for my 4 yr old nephew and his natural wildness and disregard is being treated like a “behavioral” problem by his mother. They are giving him “focus” drops, he’s has books that talk about how to listen and say please etc. His older sister (7) believes he has a behavioral issue. She was just as difficult at his age, yet tells me she never was that way – when I in fact used to watch her too at that… Read more »

Case
Guest
Case

A man was featured on NPR who had cancer and wrote 800ish pithy quotes on napkins to put and be put in his daughter’s lunch every day until she turned 18.

I wonder if that’s a method we can mind. The lists are good but delivery is important. A small bit digests longer and more deeply than a treatise. I never liked the idea of “the talk”. I always thought a series of minor talks would be more like it as with conveying that I’m always open and there’s always more nuggets of wisdom to share.

Eris
Guest
Eris

“The entire family has bought in, including Dad. ”

Whenever I see a mother reprimanding her son for basically nothing more than being young lad and doing the boisterous things they do – and then I see the father, hands in pockets standing behind her muttering, “Son, do what your mother tells you” or worse, a husband who sheepishly supports his wife’s decision to dress their son in girl’s clothes and go on TV, I can but place both hands over my face and shake my head, and wonder how on earth we got to this point.

Tin Man
Guest

My sons and I have talked a lot about this. My oldest is the most Red Pill, having had a great experience with a young cutie a couple years ago – that perfectly illustrated the concepts many of us have accepted as “general knowledge” now (but like many others, I wish I had all this while growing up). My youngest, is just emerging as recognizing all these things. It’s tough for him right now … but one of the best things in the world was when his brother said to him … “let’s go to the mall and get some… Read more »

Kingsley
Guest
Kingsley

@ Eris

“wonder how on earth we got to this point”

@ Charlotte

“much of what is talked about in the Manosphere won’t be shocking or new to the average person anymore.”

George Orwell instantly came to mind.

“The further a society drifts from truth the more it will hate those who speak it.”

SGT Ted
Guest

If you are concerned about your young men being enslaved to entitled women’s desires to use men, don’t encourage them to stick their dicks in them and crow about using “game” to get laid. Sticking their dicks in strange women is the major contributor to the problem that men make. It can also play right into the hands of a smart woman who knows how she can trap a man using his own game against him. If you don’t think that happens, you haven’t been paying attention. I’d say the admonition against using porn in this day and age has… Read more »

Bachelorocles
Guest
Bachelorocles

Great article, Rollo!!! I have one criticism of it: it’s female-centric. It presumes a man’s world revolves around women and a man’s value is defined by women. Therefore I would add a couple: * learn to live without women, go for periods in your life without a relationship, and master the bachelor lifestyle as knowing you can be very happy as a bachelor (maybe more happy as a bachelor than in a relationship?) will give you power over yourself and it will enable you to define yourself independently of women. Betadom begins when a man measures himself in relation to… Read more »

Augustus
Guest
Augustus

Nobody is gonna teach the young boys that feminists are the scum of the world and should be completely banned from mankind? Children have to be protected from feminist propaganda.

Testerod
Guest
Testerod

Rollo… I’m the guy who wrote the RP post. Very flattered and surprised to see it reposted here. You probably wouldn’t be surprised to learn that The Rational Male (website and book – which I’ve read twice), were seminal in helping me formulate the first draft of this for my own son while at the same time rebooting my own concept of what it means to be a man. Like the 22 year old soldier above, I also went through skepticism, anger, and then finally acceptance, but the most surprising part of the RP journey to me has been an… Read more »

Tam the Bam
Guest
Tam the Bam

Bach: The ancients would view us modern men as weaklings.
Well they did have the incomparable luxury of being legally able to settle many disputes with a mere couple of feet of cast tin-bronze, unless they were in one of the many slave categories.
I’d like to see them take on a SWAT team from the old villa.

Warrior_Savant
Guest
Warrior_Savant

“(13 & up) Don’t EVER BE A DOORMAT. The minute a girl disrespects you call her on it. And if she continues to disrespect you “next” her immediately no matter how emotionally difficult it is. This is absolutely critical to build your long term self-respect/self-confidence.” Should life grace me with a son (hopefully sons) this rule will be #1 with a bullet. I believe all the shortcomings of men, especially in the West, are a direct result from a willingness to put up with disrespect. People think the song “Respect” was written and sung by Aretha Franklin. But it was… Read more »

jf12
Guest
jf12

“Smile more, smirk less.” I know my son has seen much of this working, but from bad boys doing it and nice guys not doing it. Rather than requalify some bad boy, such as “Rollo’s really a good man”, I’m thinking it might be best (since he didn’t see it at home) for him to see an already good man smirking more.

jf12
Guest
jf12

Re: “I’m optimistic that in ten years’ time, much of what is talked about in the manosphere won’t be shocking or new to the average person anymore.” Maybe so. It’s mainstream enough that I (that was a capital I in case you can’t tell) find myself contributing to “what is talked about in the manosphere” in early 2014. I suspect a lot of what was learned in psychosocial circles postFreud was feared and suppressed and diverted in the previous four generations, in order to nurture feminism. Maybe the fact of promoting PUA activities as a sort of handbook for garage… Read more »

Snowy
Guest
Snowy

Some of the comments (particularly Bachelorocles’) here raise an issue that is a stark reality for me, and I’m certain all men, whether they realise it (Red Pill), or not (Blue Pill). I live in Australia, which is no less femcentric than Uncle Sam. In a world where absolutely everything is geared toward satisfaction of women’s demands of entitlement, there is literally nowhere to go for men to be men. Where can men go to get-together and be men?; a refuge, a sanctuary from the in-your-face femcentricism of the world at large; to validate, affirm, strengthen, encourage, edify our masculinity;… Read more »

jf12
Guest
jf12

Re: the idea that women enjoy something. Quelle horreur!

I claim it is a Good Thing if a man manipulates his wife into making sandwiches and she discovers that she enjoys making them.

Aaron
Guest
Aaron

Prioritize sports over studying, etc. The knock on effects of playing sports are immediate and compound into the later stages of life, while studying might start paying off in your 20s if you’re lucky and pick the right career. Boys have a hardwired need for physical competition, to feel strong and competent, and to be viewed favorably by their peers. The reason they have emotions is to prompt them to develop physically and socially. The reason boys are so powerfully drawn to video games and TV because it gratifies these hardwired needs but only as fantasy, only vicariously.

Manlymen
Guest
Manlymen

The one thing missing from the article and the comments is LEAD BY EXAMPLE. You can’t just tell your son what to do and not to do, you can’t just give him a list to memorize.

You have to BE alpha and LIVE according to the advice you’ve written.
If your son sees how you interact with women, he will follow that example from a very young age, even if he doesn’t understand the concepts.

jf12
Guest
jf12

Manlymen’s point +1. Unfortunately I’m in the situation of being new to the red pill and he’s 23 already, and I’m sure one of the things making him mgtow is how he saw his mother treating me.

davidvs
Guest

I am writing essays for my two sons about appropriate masculinity and social dynamics. At the top of this page: http://davidvs.net/hobbies/ One regret I have is that I do not include enough references. I am trying to write about issues that might help them years before they are ready for manosphere blogs. I would like to say “Thanks to Rollo for this idea” a few times within the essays. But it is more age-appropriate to instead give them a copy of your book when they are older. So thank you here and now, Rollo, for what you have helped me… Read more »

Thinker
Guest
Thinker

If you’re doing it right, he will already know these things by 13. He just won’t have the vocabulary or the resolve that comes with being conscious of what he knows. Everyday instances of red pill truth need to be used as examples and teaching moments. When you do have the talk, he should have an instant “so that’s why things work that way” moment.

Stingray
Guest

there is literally nowhere to go for men to be men. You’re right that there are not formal places, but you can make your own. Take your sons camping, shooting, hiking, etc. NO WOMEN ALLOWED. Teach them how to build a fire without matches, how to use a knife, how to build a shelter, how to hunt, fish and survive. Activities like this will help to teach some of these things when he is older, like number 6. And as Manlyman said above, most, if not all, of these can be taught by example starting at a very early age;… Read more »

MikePhil
Guest
MikePhil

An incredible post, and one I hope you include as the foreword to The Rational Male II.

vinay3543
Guest

Pretty much on the money as you would expect from a season campaigner. I’d say it is from a generic perspective, but this is totally valid as they all apply to the mass male population. The processes do need to be slightly adjusted in relevance to your (the man’s) own looks, but the fundamentals stay the same.

It’s imperative to understand the differences in women and men. The below links offer a little more meat on this subject:

http://www.vinaywcmd.com/2013/09/1-five-fundamental-differences-between_6568.html

http://www.vinaywcmd.com/2013/10/five-fundamental-differences-between.html

Lion
Guest
Lion

I think it’s important to share with your son the enormous “consequence” of marriage and children. It’s also important to share with him the various ways women will try to trap him into marriage and children. It’s important to let him know that there’s really no expectation that he should marry and have kids despite what he sees in movies and on TV or hears in the church. It’s also important to emphasize his responsibility once he confirms (beyond any doubt) that he is a father. It’s important for you to share with him the horrors of divorce, child support,… Read more »

Lion
Guest
Lion

I think most of us are responsible males. My father wasn’t. My Mom saw her first child support payment last year as a result of my father declaring bankruptcy… I was 38 years old… better late than never I guess. It would have been better if I had a decent pair of shoes growing up. My father seemed to procreate children wherever he found himself, but he never took any responsibility for them. He left a trail of misery around the country. I feel that while we’re teaching our boys to be men, we should teach them to be responsible… Read more »

jf12
Guest
jf12

With deer season over, our church is holding its annual men’s group Wild Game Supper. It’s been so cold that it will be very heavy on deer with little fish. In the past I’ve been known to be one of the many to provide a mystery dish, but this year I’m bringing the two ducks I haven’t eaten yet, probably just barbecue-braised.

None of my manly activities has ever boosted my attractiveness to women. It doesn’t work that way.

Red Team
Guest
Red Team

33. Lift weights and learn a physical combative sport such as wrestling or a form of mma. Every man should have an outlet for their energy and know how to defend themselves.

The Burninator
Guest
The Burninator

@jf12 “None of my manly activities has ever boosted my attractiveness to women. It doesn’t work that way.” The hell it doesn’t. You’re hanging around the wrong women. I hunt, I fish, I am a biker (motorcycle), I carry a sidearm openly as a “civilian” (yes, I open carry, gasp), I fly small aircraft (PPL), I do leather working and I can frame a house in a pinch if necessary. Every single one of these things, when framed properly, is a positive in women’s eyes. Especially the open carry, which marks you to pretty much every woman you pass on… Read more »

jf12
Guest
jf12

“I suspect that you’re already surrounded by a bevy of Entitled Princesses” as far as the eye can see.

jf12
Guest
jf12

Re: continuing doing what you think ought to work, especially when it used to work in earlier centuries, but hasn’t worked for you in your life or in anyone else’s life that you know in real life since the sexual revolution. Defined as insanity.

The Burninator
Guest
The Burninator

“as far as the eye can see.” I figured. Find new places where women respond to masculinity. There are plenty of them left, but I’d be sore pressed to name any of those places the modern “Men must become docile beta slaves to their wives, in the name of The Lord” churches. I’m Christian btw, so I’m not dissing religion, rather, what major segments of the Christian church have become thanks to feminism. Also, if this is the trend in your church (which it may well be?), then I urge you to sit down with your pastor and discuss this… Read more »

jf12
Guest
jf12

“Problem is, those first Crusaders were not cowed beta men walking around worshipping their wives rather they were warriors for God and would beat down and conquer the world if given half a chance (which actually, they did) and their wives answered to them.” They left their wives home. Just saying.

The Burninator
Guest
The Burninator

Yes, they did. They did because they did not answer to their wives and did not place their wives on the pedestal as modern Christians are taught to do. And when they came back home their wives were there waiting on them and treating them as the men that they were.

I’m not entirely certain what your point is, to be frank. If life isn’t giving you what you think you want, find a better place to ply your skills, talents and trade.

New Yorker
Guest
New Yorker

This is such a spot-on article. Everything, everything is about frame and dominance. The rest is just details.

Gordon
Guest
Gordon

| If you start getting a lot of shit tests, re-evaluate your frame — you’re probably coming across as too needy.

Isn’t that backwards? The more confidently you show yourself, the more you will get tested.

jf12
Guest
jf12

“Isn’t that backwards?” Women are backwards, yes. Throughout my life I got routinely shit tested by essentially every woman, even passing strangers. Currently approximately the only women who aren’t testing me are the ones that I flirted with from the instant I met them.

The Latin Buddha
Guest

“(13 & up)Develop a keen understanding of the psychological/biological nature of women… Understand how girls think. They are ALWAYS looking to upgrade. If you’re not always the “best in show”, they WILL cheat on you find someone else.”

I’m sure it’s been said before but maybe combining/adding the idea that “genuine desire cannot be negotiated” and “if she’s not fucking you, she’s fucking someone else.” Perhaps not at 13 though. 🙂

Anonymous Reader
Guest
Anonymous Reader

Question: Where is the image at the head of the article from?
It is familiar to me but I cannot place it.

girlwithadragonflytattoo
Guest

So true… I’m going to get my little brother (not so little anymore) to read you… he needs game & I have no idea how to get across to him.

Glenn
Guest
Glenn

@girlwithdragonflytatoo – I checked out your website and was impressed. I usually am not interested in what women have to say in the Red Pill world because invariably they set themselves up to “femsplain” things to men, so soaked in their female imperative and privilege that they cannot see. You, on the other hand, don’t offer a lecture but rather just seem to actually want to be good to men. Wow. As for your little brother, check out these two vids on YouTube and see if you think they’d be good for your bro. One is an excerpt of Rollo’s… Read more »

girlwithadragonflytattoo
Guest

Thank you I will… you’re right the book is a better idea. Our mom was just different… feminist to some degree, but then not really when it came to me and the training she gave me in understanding men. There are a lot more like me I promise, I think it’s generational. Gen Y’s are the product of a lot of failed marriages or divorces… a lot of women I know are backlashing against what their mothers did (pursue career first, put children on the backburner along with husband – who came after the kids of course). Not all, but… Read more »

girlwithadragonflytattoo
Guest

Glenn your comment is touching!!!! Thank you.

Max
Guest
Max

Waiting until 13 is about a dozen years too late to matter. Children form their understanding of sexual roles and how the world works in their first few years, mostly by the age of 3. If you wait until 13 or later to tell your children the truth they will already be completely and totally indoctrinated with the Feminine Imperative and female supremacy. At 13, much less 17, you will be challenging what represents their core ideas of who they are and how the world works, how men and women should ideally relate, at exactly the same time their hormones… Read more »

G
Guest
G

My own thoughts which you may not like, but that’s the point of critical discussion right? 1. (13 & up) Don’t chase. Be aloof. Let girls come to you. If you do pursue, do it in a carefully calculated way: Pursue and retreat. Push and pull. Make her chase you. As a man, you need to initiate and lead but frame her as the chaser and you as the selector. 1. (13 & up) Texting, phone calls, etc… Be disciplined in your response. Use the 1-3 ratio in responding to her texts, phone calls. Give her one short text response/phone… Read more »

Water Cannon Boy
Guest
Water Cannon Boy

The flip side to doing nice things for or being nice to girls is if she does something nice for you, or gets you a gift, take a moment to ponder her motivations behind it. Is it something she thinks you really like? Is it out of liking you? Or is it a way of directing you or changing you into something she likes? Or is it a setup for some future plan? I also slightly disagree with being nice or doing something nice for a girl. It can work for you. However, like I read on Return of Kings,… Read more »

TheSlasher
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TheSlasher

I will comment on advice number 31: (17 & up) Push boundaries, take risks and be exciting… Even when you’re scared shitless. There’s nothing sexier to a woman than a man who is unafraid to embrace challenges. I’m talking about the last sentence, pushing boundaries and taking risks is a good thing to do, this is the place for growth and flow, but the reasoning, I believe and in my own introspection and studies, is coming from the wrong place. Women are there, of course, but for me, taking risks isn’t about impressing anyone. Taking risks for women to know… Read more »

TuffLuv
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TuffLuv

Want to know what’s a lot more difficult, and even more important?

Showing your son(s) concrete examples of these things in the home. Very difficult indeed. Plus you are limited to one woman, and personality type. I learned all my patriarchal, alpha behaviors from my father’s example. I didn’t have the manosphere, but those learned behaviors went a long way.

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[…] in mind I do understand that raising your son by a Red Pill example would be ideal. I’ve written about it before. What I’m asking is how to approach a young man already steeped in a Blue Pill feminized […]

rugby11ljh
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rugby11ljh

“If you cannot teach your son positive masculinity, the Feminine Imperative and a fem-centric world will tech him its version of masculinity.”

At 27 just getting to that with my creator. Used to get hit for calling him “dad”

Forgiveness in life is the hardest thing to learn for me as a man.

Thank You Rollo

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