For the past three years of The Rational Male there’s been a consistent presence in the comment threads of guys seeking advice for particular situations with regards to Game. Whether it’s fine tuning certain aspects of Game or a larger consensus of the guys participating in my comment threads it’s become obvious there’s a need for a dedicated page and comment thread to address these Field Reports.
So I’m instituting this page for exactly this. If there is some urgency to have members of The Rational Male community analyze your particular situation feel free to hit anyone up in the comments of my current post, but please refer them to your particular field report with a link to your comment here. I’m hoping this will alleviate the mass of posts for field report analysis and Game specific insights piled into the main blog post for any given week.
There will be some rules for this “forum” as such. I ask that you only keep your comments to addressing the field reports at hand and save your larger theoretical stuff for the main posts, or if relevant, keep the “bigger scope of things” posts to being as succinct as possible. There will be no moderation in this comment thread (spamming excepted), so realize it will be a very hot kitchen before you post. I will impose no restrictions on video links here, nor will I limit links to various, but pertinent articles.
Understand, this is an experiment for now. It’s likely this comment thread will exceed thousands of comments. I’ll be instituting new comment plug-ins for wordpress to deal with this in the future, but I may archive this page the the posts and refresh this page in the future as well. If this gets cumbersome I may simply institute a dedicated forum-style sub-site of The Rational Male to accommodate for Game specific questions.
So have at it, post your field reports and feel free to comment on the ones you have some particular insight for. Be forewarned that it’s likely things may get a bit salty at times and I expect a lot of back & forth with debate and disagreements, but that’s what this thread is for – to hash out Game particulars for your given situations.
Some field notes, RP observations, triumphs and mistakes… And lolz. At the pool while away. Somewhat crowded lots of chairs around though. See HB8 and hard body MILF approach pool in bikinis. They eventually go all the way around the pool the long way and end up next to me. I see them headed my way and flip on my stomach and snooze. They take the chairs one over from me. After a bit I get up walk past them into the pool and then back. As I go by I scold them for bringing clouds and wasps… They were… Read more »
Oh one more note re social media and phones and such. This girl has 15k insta followers… 98k unread emails which i busted her on… And ither than showing me her pics and such was on her phone exactly once during this whole time… To respond to a logistics text for a job thing the next morning and she applogized and asked if I minded if she responded as it was urgent. So there is that data point.
@Sentient
Solid field report. You just got a little pushy/outcome dependent at the end. You should have added a False Time Constraint to your ‘come have a water’ excuse (“I have an early flight in the morning, so you can only stay for a little bit”) and just need sex less than her (because she was DTF or she wouldn’t have come to your room) (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5mFl7ov5xk 2:44:45). then basic two steps forward, one step back. “we shouldn’t be doing this” etc. until you get the bang.
@Sentient
Excellent FR. Great mood. My Friday night was better than Sat. and my Sat was better than most guys’ any night.
You’re my hero!
J
That’s a good clip. I know i left a lot in the bar laying back expecting an offer price… And i do have a tendency to be a bit cavalier and arrogant. A downside of abundance mentality, it can go against good technical game. Thx.
@Sentient: well done man. Good FR, lots of learning material.
@Sentient sometimes just vibing is enough to keep you in state. Had a similar night the other night where I didn’t pull but was gaming every girl I came across and they were responding. Paying for her drink…hmmmm. She pulled some crap on you but I was in a similar situation a while back with a girl I met on public transport. She was cute HB7. We went out twice and I escalated each time. Third time she came over and I banged her after we cooked dinner. The next time we were to meet, she insisted we go out… Read more »
Wala They AMOG thing… Really wasnt that so much as an apex alpha jsut doing his apex alpha thing. Like it had nothing to so with me as it did with him seeing a hot girl and being him and naturally going over and grabbing her. I was immaterial. Hard to explain, but it was good natures and jovial as was my comment to him… It was playful, I knew i had her and she had just shown me a dozennpics of big name dudes who chase her so she wasnt phased. That said I didnt want him stayimg around… Read more »
@Sentient
So not much talk, then some laser and kino and taking her hand and leading her off… But obviously not enough to get the bang!
Did you make her qualify herself? Especially about being a tease?
Wala Like my frame is of course we are both attracted to each other which is why we are talking and do enough non sexual kino to show you are not a chode, and then lead them off. If she was sassy or shit testing me I would be more verbal and sexualize verbally more… More banter. This was more being aloof and assuming my high value and having her qualify more. She was most of the time actually. Huh. The other thing is- sounds weird but maybe Blax posted it the other day – she was hot, objectivly smoking… Read more »
ASD
Most of the night was her qualifying. But no not in the room about being a tease.
@Sentient
So the chemistry wasn’t there…or at least, not explosive…maybe you were the one teasing?
Jesus Christ this 30 Day Challenge is just too fucking hard. The last approaches I made were last Thursday when I went out and approached two 2-sets. However, Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Today I haven’t been able to make a single fucking approach!! Friday night I was stuck in my head. I hit up a bar/club I’ve never really been to before. Like, I’ve visited it once or twice but it’s been awhile so the new environment – and the older, more mature crowd – intimidated the hell out of me. I spent two hours there, bouncing back and forth… Read more »
https://youtu.be/3UE1Nk_y4r8
Here you safe space… Open, it wont kill you.
But not opening just might…
@Safespace. Dude chill. Break it down. You’re developing a scarcity mentality with the negative ‘at this rate I’ll never get laid’ stuff. First dial it Down. Work on one thing…the opener and neg…make that the first part of your 30 day challenge reboot. Once clear and serif results move through A2 and A3 to comfort. For resource material watch the entire first series of The Pickup artist. Your 30 day challenge is laid out there with little sub Challenges. Get good at one thing before moving to he next. You’re ploughing and can’t deconstruct the pieces to improve. Secondly I… Read more »
@safespaceplaypen You are in a vicious circle. You need to find a way to get into a virtuous cycle. I noted to you back on February 21st that self destruction is not self improvement. Review this: https://therationalmale.com/field-reports/comment-page-9/#comment-190411 You are falling headlong into a Gumption Trap. Read this and also click on to the two links. https://therationalmale.com/2016/10/24/please-breakup-with-me/comment-page-8/#comment-176130 You are killing yourself. You need a mentor because you are flying blind. You are Buffering and forgetting that Rejection is better than Regret. Being an incel and being rejected sucks. Its normal to feel anger, denial, bargaining and depression about that. Totally fucking… Read more »
Weekend FR. I go to a club on my own and join the line without much of a warm up prior to that. A bunch of girls in front of me, so I open asap with a simple hey! how long does it take to get in?! Two of them turn their heads to me and say they’ve just joined and it should be a few minutes. I tease them they’re liars and that they’ve been here for at least 2 hours. They giggle, but don’t engage and keep talking to each other. A couple joins behind me and I… Read more »
@Safespace With your mindset, you might also consider you are doing your Game development some disservice. Perhaps you are crippling the flow of learning in mastery. Maybe you should just relieve yourself often, relax and take a break start from square one instead of punching above your weight. Just like I already pointed out the Mystery Method M3 mistake at starting with comfort instead of attraction>comfort>seduction. In your last post you acted as if you wanted to start at Seduction first. That’s just creepy and could get you a world of trouble. Just so you know, no one here doesn’t… Read more »
@IRL Holy shit dude this is seriously good game. You had a lot of preselection, but you didn’t do anything with it. To take a quote from this comment by YaReally (http://yareallyarchive.com/2015/7/#comment-heartiste-689932): “Like, THAT’S what pickup “artistry” looks like. It’s taking everything you do and building off it toward your goal. Like building a skyscraper instead of a bunch of little houses. That’s the mindset you want to be in, so that when you end a set you don’t think “ok time to leave this area”, you think “ok now who saw that and how can I build off it?””… Read more »
@IRL Props on getting out there and opening girls. You’re 90% of the way there. Great FR! The shy girl didn’t know how to kiss and was thin. Too bad, she was into you. Likely low mileage and you could have taught her some things and she would have been your alpha widow. There’s more things happening, but I’m puzzled by how I could have played it out with the redhead. You being “caught” with shy girl by the redhead put the “player” attribute on you and raised the redhead’s ASD. You needed to re-open the redhead and put her… Read more »
IRL
Which girls was hotter? Shy girl or redhead?
LOL. Safespace meet IRL. IRL is the kind of guy that you need to have as a mentor. Back a while ago I used to have another game related hobby. On a forum that all the members were in the same U.S.A state. We all got together in real life (IRL) with a like-minded hobby and we did shit together. And it turned out the best peak experience over five years ever. I never lived so well as when I fell into a great group of guys. Women are fickle. An excellent group of guys are not. A couple years… Read more »
CSP
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Ofy
http://wp.me/s4tvpM-raw
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1OfC
@SJF Walalalala I’m not wingin it bro. I’ve read the Mystery Method, I’ve read Daygame Mastery too (the sections on what to do on the dates is pretty great), I’ve watched PIMP, I’ve watched a ton of other RSD shit, I’ve read through about 70% of Yareally’s archive (I relate to his perspective pretty well lol) and I’ve read/watched a ton of other resources as well. I know what good daygame looks like. I’ve seen all of Krausers infields and I’ve seen a ton of Julien/Tyler infields as well. My head is pretty cooked when it comes to info. Like,… Read more »
@SJF “What is your plan, exactly?” lol this is a great question. My plan is really simple: (1) Follow the “Open – Plow – Hook Point – Vibe – Close” model pushed by RSDJulien as closely as I possibly can. There are other models out there, but from what i’ve read they’re all really fucking similar. Like, Mystery’s and Krausers models are all very similar to this one. (2) For 30 Days, try to approach at least 1 girl a day – this was the original “challenge” i gave to myself, which began about a month ago and will end… Read more »
Might as well ask for some advice here on a Fuckbuddy. I called her up Saturday night around 9 asking what’s she doing. tells me she’s going to some bar to celebrate her friends birthday. I say “nah, gonna go check out some other bars. maybe I’ll come by later”. Go to some bars, hit on some girls. Good routine I thought of the spot: I was next to this HB8 at the bar, had already ordered my beer, bartender puts her drink on the table, while she’s paying for it, I just take her drink. she looks at me,… Read more »
@Sentient – great FR. What stood out for me wasn’t the end in the hotel room, but actually opening the 9 on the street and having the frame to engage her, even if briefly. Like even reading the FR, I could feel a little “sympathetic” approach anxiety at the thought of opening a set like that so it was good to see that you opened, even if it was on the second opportunity. Re the hotel room model girl – she obviously liked you so it seems like it was a straightforward case of not enough sexualization early on (because… Read more »
J Plamasailor
Re the drink. He could give it back to her, then say that looks good what is it, then say “give me a sip”.
“Give me a sip” is a nice little compliance test, and slightly sexual. Can use any where in the bar too.
@Sentient nice FR at 9:27a… did you even THINK about a threesome with the mom/daughter situ?…lol… and then, mentally start to figure out a plan?… bc even if you don’t execute, that’s a good exercise/attitude builder…lol… but not kidding… I think I would pay 5k for an infield video of a pull of one of these girls right here right now in the midst of the mother of jealousy plot lines AND the mother of all cockblock set ups. and why didn’t YOU do this?…lol…but also not kidding… you have all the alpha stud chops that you need to pull… Read more »
@safespaceplaypen (2) For 30 Days, try to approach at least 1 girl a day – this was the original “challenge” i gave to myself, which began about a month ago and will end this wednesday. I’ll probably give myself a one day break to get my shit together. Then I’ll restart the “30 day challenge” but with the goals adjusted – probably 3 girls per day, for example. I like to keep things at a day by day basis so that every day I’m plagued with a goal to fulfill. This gets me more psychologically motivated then say “approach 50… Read more »
CSP
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Ogp
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Ogc
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1O9R
@j Great link, thanks for sharing. Lots of little nuances to think about in a more structured way. Really cool stuff. Switching girls at the sofa sounds like a good option, although they were at some distance from me and I’d need to try to build the momentum across the room or to wave them over. A bit risky given the window got shut and I don’t think they would comply at this stage. I assumed I was isolated enough and I was more focused on gaming the shy girl, I didn’t expect to see the redhead in the somehow… Read more »
@HABD and @safespace:
Damn HABD, that comment to safespace IS OUTSTANDING ADVICE. Outstanding advice for everyone else too. This could be the breakthrough he needs.
IRL
Sounds like the redhead would think you lowered your value with the shy girl… I.e. she views herself as hotter.
So instead of preselection you get deselection.
You can hang and be social with lower HB #s, have them chasing you but your showing sexual interest will hurt your value with higher HB girls.
A bit for guys who hit hotels… So I am away at this nice hotel. Work stuff. I am waiting for my lunch meeting to meet me in the lobby. I see an atttractive older woman sitting in a chair so I go over and sit next to her. After a few minutues of fiddling with my phone open her with general “how is your day going commentary”. We chit chat in a basic social way. Very light. We have some mutual interest in the non profit world. Very cordial basic social chat. She is not stayimg here but in… Read more »
@IRL good FR… mostly solid game… @Sentient The redhead was taller, more sexual, had bigger boobs, nicer ass and the sense of humour I like. I think this played role when she saw me isolated with the shy one. it sounds like the redhead was hotter… AND that you actually would have preferred her bc you didn’t really want the shy girl as she was too skinny… aaand the redhead was into you…lol… after all she ran up to you and tried to ‘mark her territory’ (although that’s a dog concept…lol) when she ran up to you on the dance… Read more »
One more movie line… Tell her “be careful who youbrun into in hotel lobbies…” Lolz
https://twitter.com/TomTorero/status/836960343389786112
https://twitter.com/TomTorero/status/832682164474961920
https://twitter.com/TomTorero/status/831790794772189185
@Sentient
Fucking epic man. Reads like an erotic short story. This is one of the reasons I love this shit: Making woman’s sexual fantasies come true.
Sentient – great LR. The 50 year old bit reads very similar to how a lot of my restroom pulls go (goes to show you can fuck up a thousand ways but a successful pull has a similar vibe). Was such a mindfuck for me the first time a woman thanked ME for a pull like that. Why didn’t you try to take her to your room after you’d fingered her and she’d given you a HJ? Seems like her LMR would be blown away by then? Or did you just sort of want to get on with the evening… Read more »
Culum.
She would not go… Haha. Yup. Because that would be slutty I guess… Fucking cats… I said you know I have a big bed up there would have fucked you blind… No dice.
@Sentient, excellent! Sentient’s Squirting 101 video course! lol!
LOL.
I had that Tinder chick late-30s boyfriend hunting a year or so ago. You may remember the LR because it was my first one after a months-long dry spell.
Almost exactly the same. Fingered her, and she gave me a HJ in a dark parking lot outdoors in the middle of winter..but wouldn’t walk 3 minutes to my apartment. Too much ASD.
Culum
This is another good state song for walking around and gaming
https://youtu.be/39VXuviqD9w
CSP
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Ogt
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Ogv
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1OgC
@blax
got any more stories?
@forge
Been trying some of the supplements you mentioned, and majorly changed my diet, but has had almost no effect so far. Have some more things I can try now, may know what at least one of the issues is, but will have to see.
@having a bad day Thanks for the help. Today and yesterday didn’t really go so well for reasons I won’t get into lol. I went out but didn’t really have the drive in me. Today is the last day of the challenge and I’m pretty mentally burnt out but I’ve developed a good understanding of what I really need to work on and deal with. My first big issue is that I never approach immediately due to anxiety and nervousness – I pretty much always wait around for a few minutes or seconds before saying anything; my second big issue… Read more »
CSP
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1OgO
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1OgQ
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1OgU
Basically, I’m trying to (a) get laid, (b) get over approach anxiety somewhat, (c) get good at game, and (d) be outcome independent. Go back and read HABD’s post about ten more times. Switch up your order. In order to be a man you need to be able to be alone. A. Be outcome independent. B. Get good at game. C. Get over approach anxiety somewhat D. Get Laid. Another thing to think about is cultivating an excellent relationship with other men, hang out with other men and rely on other men in order to get with women. And always… Read more »
@Sentient: at the risk of making the description more pornographic, for the inexperienced among us (like me), how exactly do you finger the woman? Did you just do it over them, did you/she remove or rip the panties (didn’t seem like it, or was she not even wearing them (in which case, she was definitely DTF from the start I guess)?
Also agree, weird doing that in semi-public but not want to go private. I’m not even sure it was ASD, maybe more related to the fantasy aspect of it for her.
I get where you’re coming from about the fantasy aspect but in this case it was almost certainly ASD. Just a specific mental block about “going to the room”. I had exactly the same thing with the woman who gave me a HJ in the parking lot but wouldn’t come to my place 3 min away. Thinking is kind of similar to the kind of girl who is technically a virgin, but is willing to do anal and give BJs etc. As for the panties, I don’t know how Sentient did it but typically when I do that kind of… Read more »
IAS Culum The risk? Hit it HABD! On the direct point three basic approaches to panties… In this case she had a skirt on so just grab the crotch from the side and yank it over to the other side. You can tug down from the crotch to lower the waistband if you need a little more space. The other is like Culum enter from the top and use downward pressure with the back of your hand ✋ to pull the waistband down. Third is my fave if you have the time and space grab both sides of the crotch… Read more »
@Sentient, you say hook with the two middle fingers. Yo are talking about curling your fingers upward the doing the squirting 101 g spot rub, correct?
Oh yeah. Get your shoulders into it. Use your shoulders to pin her back against the wall or on the bed. With some of your hody weight behind you. Create that physical dominant presence. Be up tight on her with your body. You are not poking at her from an arms length. Possese that body with you r masculine strength.
Eddie Murphy had a funny skit about discovering your shoulders around 25… Lol
@Sentient: haven’t really fingered anyone. I can count on my fingers the number of times my fingers went in (ahah – sad but true).
Wife says it is uncomfortable (huge beta tell I guess). It is a shame as I really want to practice the spiderman squirting move.
@IAS, “wife says it’s uncomfortable” … but she still lets her gynecologist poke around. 🙂
Newly
Correct. But also some clit contact with the heel of your palm. Which the video clip does not really focus on.
Another thing is to move your hand from the throat to cover her mouth while puching her head back or holding it down. Forces her to hold in her moans while breathing harder through the nose. Seems to intensify the moment.
IAS you might try this when your wife is complaining while growling shut up or shut the fuck up as you feel inspired in the moment. And then see how wet she gets after that.
Have fun.
Lol. Historically if a chick is wearing a dress, I’ve been known to just rip the panties off if it can be done without causing her injury. Some chicks may wear industrial strength nylon type drawers though. The night my youngest daughter was conceived, my wife’s lingerie wound up completely torn and shredded. Both wives were consistently subjected to panty, bra and stocking destruction. I should’ve bought stock iin Victoria’s secret. IAS I have to admit that you kind of shocked me. How can your wife take a penis and complain that a finger is uncomfortable? That seems to be… Read more »
@Blaximus: it boggles the mind, doesn’t it? But I think you know how well trying logic would work.
Another technique I like is to do it from behind. Push her down on her knees ass up, grab hand full of hair and pull her head back. Use your thumb in her vag from behind like a stuby cock and now your two middle fingers on the the clit and just fuck her with your hand this way. A few hard nipple squeezes as she is cumming and then your free hand pressing up with your arm while you squeeze her throat and then slip two fingers in her mouth. Like a wrestling move… The position where you start… Read more »
IAS The thing to is though… Just relax man. Just do whatever your body is telling you it wants to do in the moment without any thought. That is what creates this tornado of desire and emotion because you are just taking whatever it is you want without any regard whatsover to what she is feeling. Cant say enough how much this kind of forceful approach matters. You can see once you do it a few times how much they just want to submit and be dominated and used for pleasure and that that is the thing that is really… Read more »
@safespaceplaypen @having a bad day Thanks for the help. you are welcome… buuut, the only thing that any of us can do for you (in real life or on the interwebs) is to give you some advice/encouragement… you have to walk the path yourself… and props on putting in the effort… but fighting through the FI/BP illusions and pushing back on the FI’s hand on your shoulder is a bitch… and is going to put you so far outside your comfort zone that you might puke… (not kidding on that…i did at some point in my RP journey…lol)… but keep… Read more »
Safespace HABD
Safe is confused with the terms… He means Intent when he thinks of being “outcome dependent”… Outcome dependence bad – intent good. Intent is in alignment with your MPoO.
@Sentient Safespace HABD Safe is confused with the terms… He means Intent when he thinks of being “outcome dependent”… Outcome dependence bad – intent good. Intent is in alignment with your MPoO. intent is great!…lol… i see outcome dependence as wanting sex while trapped in her frame… whereas intent is wanting sex while in your frame… safespace’s FR didn’t read like that’s what he meant… mostly bc he was trapped in ‘her’ frame… but if that’s what he meant, then yes, that’s good to have that… bc i agree intent is part of your MPoO… and did you figure out… Read more »
HABD _ think we are saying the same thing with Safe, he is confused about the difference but is acting wrongly as well… lol
On the EE girl… my thought is not sexualizing enough earlier… being to “social” and lack of intent. But perhaps you see something else? I don’t think it was the octopus…
What have you got?
@IAS “Wife says it is uncomfortable (huge beta tell I guess).” I can confirm based on my own first hand experience that this is cognitive and emotional (visceral) discomfort and not strictly physical uncomfortable-ness. It is a beta tell. Girls make rules for betas and break them for alphas…. But don’t let that disappoint you. Work on being more alpha (and get her to trust that you can maintain your more alpha state). It (the no fingering rule) can resolve as she trusts you in your more alpha state as you get better. It is a shit test. It’s a… Read more »
It (the no fingering rule) can resolve as she trusts you in your more alpha state as you get better. This can resolve like this in the longer term… in the short term – i.e. she comes home this weekend. Remember that desire is lube and laughter is lube. Her biggest sex organ is between her ears IAS. You really do need to DO THE WORK to change her state and create the desire. You keep punting this with her. When HABD says it’s all great practice to game your wife – regardless of what you feel or if you… Read more »
@Sentient -great stuff. I’m going to try some of these variations in a couple of weeks when my new FB from the last restroom pull comes over. @Safespace – This is fantastic advice from HABD. I’ve been in the Game 10+ years (although I was in a relationship for most of that time) and things didn’t really click for me in terms of understanding stuff conceptually, then seeing it happen in front of me, then finally applying it practically until I came to the manosphere (first CH, then here) and learned about hypergamy and why women behave the way they… Read more »
there was talk upthread about “how do you sexualize”. Here is an example from the set with the Serbian girl… there was some solid banter in that set I didn’t elaborate on, she was great very feisty… So I started off just rolling in right next to her and claiming a tiny spot at the bar. Ask her how its going… detect the accent… ask her about that then cut her off “wait! let me guess” and then before I do she blurts it out “Serbian”… I say ah I would have said Azerbaijani… she laughs then makes fun of… Read more »
@Sentient on EE model girl… to the extent that you were ‘waiting’ for her to spring the ‘i’m an escort and here’s my price’ on you, you were in her frame… and just THAT much of a frame shift was ‘enough’… but even THEN you could have still converted bc she actually went to your room… it was just that your margin for error was reduced at that point… AND why she shit tested you by stopping and standing on the way there… that’s why i asked why wouldn’t you just expect that she would WANT to give you a… Read more »
Very subtle HABD and spot on… Thanks
@having a bad day I respect your points. But tbh, and I won’t get into the details because I’ve got shit i gotta do, there are a lot of other pua viewpoints i’ve gathered in order to make my decision in how to get good at this. Anyone who comes in and says “No, this is THE way to get good at X” is someone I’m naturally going to be skeptical of. I’ve watched a lot of RSDJulien, I’ve watched a lot of RSDTyler and RSDOzzie, and I’ve read a lot of Krauser, Steve Jabba, GLL, Mystery and a lot… Read more »
“this is the FI pushing on you again… there is nothing paradoxical about any pua material… that’s just you trying to mentally organize the material without an understanding of the underlying mech/dynamics in play…” Also, you’re point that nothing in pua material is paradoxical is retarded lol. There are plenty of things about that are paradoxical – the benefits of both outcome dependence and independence is one example. Human nature and behavior is inherently illogical, and given that Game is an aspect of human behavior, is necessarily going to be illogical, which means it is going to be contradictory on… Read more »
But this is all keyboard jockeying bullshit lol I should prolly piece out and get to work lmao
@HABD
Oh shit, I went for the lower hanging fruit and dropped the ball. No, I didn’t notice this was the moment to tease her about her throwing herself at me, assume the sale and just lead her elsewhere. Thanks for that comment HABD. Solid insights, keep them coming.
@safespaceplaypen @having a bad day I respect your points. no you don’t…lol… at least not right now…but i don’t expect you to even be able to either… that’s just where you are on the RP process timeline… but if you put in enough time/effort, you will…lol… But tbh, and I won’t get into the details because I’ve got shit i gotta do, there are a lot of other pua viewpoints i’ve gathered in order to make my decision in how to get good at this. Anyone who comes in and says “No, this is THE way to get good at… Read more »
ike above… it’s mostly the FI… and BP ego investments which are hard to let go of all at once… bc that rate of change would be too fast… and cause too much cognitive dissonance…
Safespace – while the above may happen, you don’t need to take the short step but long route. You can just flip a switch and commit. And rewire your brain like that (snap!).
Up to you.
“Safespace – while the above may happen, you don’t need to take the short step but long route. You can just flip a switch and commit. And rewire your brain like that (snap!).” Ahhh……I remember fondly when Sentient and HABD migrated here from Heartiste in early 2016 and said exactly the same. IIRC it was in regards to Dutchman’s predicament. (I’m not sure he made it through triage, nor am I prediction Safespace will.) At the time I was bent on doing the slow methodical married red pill game route, cause it was working. (I don’t do PUA, because of… Read more »
CSP
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1OgY
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1OgW
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Oh2
SJF
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oG-nnDlnWrA
It really helped me back then to actually believe that desire to flip the switch is a thing that leads to getting it done.
“I’m not going to be the person I’m expected to be anymore”
Please tell me somebody watches these clips…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5r5PXBiwR0
A helpful reminder of Cat Thinking… and Feeling…
Re: Chanel Advert Dog Interpretation: Bird gets necked sniffed by chancer/male model on the Orient Express. Bird has a bit of sleepless night, so does chancer to some extent, even stalking her cabin and thinking about knocking on the door. Bird reaches Istanbul, does a bit of wistful sight seeing, and then the chancer comes up behind her whilst she’s waiting at the station to go home and starts kissing her neck. Cat Translation: Seriously though, the closest I can get, is the female rape fantasies I’ve heard about, in that the bird just wants a nameless, bold, attractive, stranger,… Read more »
^ Addendum (got cut out)
Cat Translation:
** Pictorial cross section of female head, with cranial space filled with a mass of random lines **
Seriously though, the closest I can get, is the female rape fantasies I’ve heard about, in that the bird just wants a nameless, bold, attractive, stranger, to have his way with her.
Chunky
the bird just wants a nameless, bold, attractive, stranger, to have his way with her.
Sounds familiar right?
https://therationalmale.com/field-reports/comment-page-11/#comment-191689
How will this inform your future interactions?
@Sentient Safespace – while the above may happen, you don’t need to take the short step but long route. You can just flip a switch and commit. And rewire your brain like that (snap!). Up to you. all true… like i said, some methods are faster and more efficient than others…lol… but i don’t know that safespace would be able to handle that kind of transition… it’s pretty disorienting…lol… i’ve known lots of guys like safespace in real life and they seem to need that certainty that they are competent at what they are trying to do even though they… Read more »
@HABD @Safespace, HABD, if you think about it, your distinction between “outcome independent opening” instead of “outcome-worrying approaching” is the cure for “not being in state.” I used to think that being in state was some sort of euphoria scale (ie I just wasn’t feeling it enough to open), but after your comment, I realize that being in state is the acknowledgment of what your “dependence meter” is set at. Set it your way to just open without worry of outcome and you will be in state. Set it to Safespace’s way and you’ll be battling and cursing at your… Read more »
Fwiw, I’ll repeat an earlier thought iid expressed. Train your brain to be ” in state ” all day every day. Be ” in state ” about life. Ideal outcomes are wonderful and amazing. But absolutely nothing happens without opportunity and the good news is that all one has to do is capitalize on opportunity, or create opportunity where none seems apparent. Every single day you are presented with multiple opportunity and choices. Shit, it don’t get any better than that. Chicks are only one part of the equation, and tbh, they are a relatively simple part at that. Every… Read more »
@Blax, I hear you, man. Luckily for me, I’m an inquisitive, positive dude always walking around with a smirk like I know a good joke, so I’ve experienced a lot of opportunities that didn’t seem to be there. I remember reading a good book when I was a younger buck. It was called Rich Dad Poor Dad.” The book went over an example of how opportunities are all around us. The young kid in the book worked at a convenience store that also sold comic books. Luckily he kept his eyes opened and noticed that the comics that didn’t sell… Read more »
CSP
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Oh7
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Ohg
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1Oh0
@newlyaloof lol there really isn’t much of a difference between outcome-independent-opening (what HABD considers “opening”) and outcome-worrying-opening (what HABD considers “approaching”). This is really all semantical bullshit. If you go up to a girl and say “hey what’s up” – that IS approaching a girl, and that IS opening a girl. In practice they are literally the same thing. The ONLY difference between the outcome-independent-open and the outcome-worrying-open is that in the former, you do not give a shit what happens (present-in-the-moment/in-state/whatever) whereas in the latter you DO give a shit what happens (nervous of awkwardness/being rude/whatever) — this all… Read more »
@ safespace… In boxing a good instructor teaches his student not to fully concentrate on ” giving a shit “, insofar as you will recognize what your opponent is doing and make constant adjustments to throw him off or successfully counter. Thinking only about winning is a sure fire way to do a bang up job at losing. I will grant you this: the preparation and practice does take place in the gym daily. But if you step into the ring in a live fight being anxious or concerned, you’re gonna have a long ( or really, really short )… Read more »
Background reading to the comment Blaximus just posted:
http://patstedman.com/2017/02/28/get-what-you-want-in-dating/
http://patstedman.com/2016/07/25/what-is-frame/
Blax
You should know by now that these many, mid 20s virgins just know better… It’s a common feature.
:/ duckiest duckface emoji
@safespace, you say there’s no difference to an approach and an open. I’ll disagree using an analogy. A plane approaching a landing. The approach is filled with calculations, coordinates, flaps, air speed, air traffic, talking to the tower, etc, etc. Lots of variables are required during the approach – FOR THE PILOT. But the carefree passenger doesn’t care about all those variables; he’s just chillin’ on a journey. Be the passenger, not the pilot. Both the pilot and passenger will get to the same destination, but the passenger will be more relaxed and have fun for much longer than the… Read more »
@Sentient lol mid-20’s virgins must’ve forgotten these 3 iron rules of logic: (1) fucking lots of girls gives you license to give bad advice (2) Questioning advice from a guy whose fucked lots of girls must mean you have an ego problem or are (3) using counter examples from other guys who’ve fucked lots of girls (RSDJulien, Tyler, Ozzie, Jabba) means nothing if you yourself have not actually fucked lots of girls. Just like how using empirical evidence to refute a scientific theory means nothing if you don’t have a PHD lol Also, lol, this wikipedia page cannot be understood… Read more »
Oh shit. The YaReally/scray ” why should we listen to you and not rsd ” argument.
Hmmm. I know dudes that are probably fucking chicks right now who’ve never seen Julien or Jabba(???wtf??) or Tyler or Ozzie or Harriet or Dave or Eddie.
Try to be helpful… lol.
@ safespace
I’d bet my life and yours that I’ve banged multiples of the number that the guys you mentioned have.
How’d that happen?
Never mind Blax… Safe has it all figured out… By his own admission he’s read the Canon… he knows everything… except how to practice his faith and live his faith… Funny that the laypeople are the ones practicing the faith… walking the pilgrim’s path.. while the “pros” are the celibate ones telling you what to do and pocketing the money.
Go figure.