For the past three years of The Rational Male there’s been a consistent presence in the comment threads of guys seeking advice for particular situations with regards to Game. Whether it’s fine tuning certain aspects of Game or a larger consensus of the guys participating in my comment threads it’s become obvious there’s a need for a dedicated page and comment thread to address these Field Reports.
So I’m instituting this page for exactly this. If there is some urgency to have members of The Rational Male community analyze your particular situation feel free to hit anyone up in the comments of my current post, but please refer them to your particular field report with a link to your comment here. I’m hoping this will alleviate the mass of posts for field report analysis and Game specific insights piled into the main blog post for any given week.
There will be some rules for this “forum” as such. I ask that you only keep your comments to addressing the field reports at hand and save your larger theoretical stuff for the main posts, or if relevant, keep the “bigger scope of things” posts to being as succinct as possible. There will be no moderation in this comment thread (spamming excepted), so realize it will be a very hot kitchen before you post. I will impose no restrictions on video links here, nor will I limit links to various, but pertinent articles.
Understand, this is an experiment for now. It’s likely this comment thread will exceed thousands of comments. I’ll be instituting new comment plug-ins for wordpress to deal with this in the future, but I may archive this page the the posts and refresh this page in the future as well. If this gets cumbersome I may simply institute a dedicated forum-style sub-site of The Rational Male to accommodate for Game specific questions.
So have at it, post your field reports and feel free to comment on the ones you have some particular insight for. Be forewarned that it’s likely things may get a bit salty at times and I expect a lot of back & forth with debate and disagreements, but that’s what this thread is for – to hash out Game particulars for your given situations.
@Student
https://mega.nz/#F!Z3YXzTRZ!OERPatKrGUzUw_LOwz8d6A!A34nhLrY
@Softek Good post – and surely a common experience for most guys growing up in the Third Wave of Feminism: Open Hypergamy https://therationalmale.com/field-reports-comment-page-2-comments/comment-page-121/#comment-276947 And, in particular, this: “And it does suck. But mostly because of the bigger picture: it only happens (chronically) to guys who have no clue. And they have no clue because of their childhood lack of masculine influence/instruction/bonding, and the cycle repeats through the teens and even well into the 20’s and beyond, until they stumble upon a resource like this blog or by some miracle find some guy to help them, and show them the light.… Read more »
@Sentient I’m trying to figure out server girl mentality. Here’s my understanding–tell me if I’m wrong. Server girls share tips and are paid a low hourly wage. On weekend nights it’s all hands on deck–nobody is getting sent home early. Yet, despite the community pot system, these girls are very competitive. They complain about other girls getting customers in their area. One whined when I hit up a bartender instead of her for a drink. And I’m not a big tipper by any means. She said that I should be loyal to her since she danced with me. (Not really,… Read more »
What!!???!!!??!!??
@SJF, thanks. I think that short story also points out that I still have a lot of work on self-improvement in a masculine direction that I’ve got to do – I cannot imagine my wife pronouncing the same words.
By the way, at the link you pointed above there is a comment by jacktenofhearts that is also really really good. Mentioning just in case somebody else around here finds it useful.
Go back to sleep, Blax.
Well, I can’t talk about someone else’s experience, but I see certain server girls going home with guys they just met.
[Peanut gallery’s gonna throw peanuts, lol.]
@theasdgamer
Nobody is saying pulling server girls isn’t possible. My wing for example has pulled 4 hired guns this year alone. 2 waitresses (Medellin, Colombia and Paris, France), and 2 hotel front desk girls (New Cairo, Egypt and Cusco, Peru).
your getting dislikes only because your autistic server analysis is retarded lol.
Blaximus
What!!???!!!??!!??
Nothing important.
Having A Bad Day and Sentient – and others. Umm. Some reassurance please. Or a slap around the head if needed. Things generally going well with wife and kids – usual ups and downs but overall positive. Moving to a new city with family. I came here alone for a month or two to clear the way and start work, and wife and kids staying with my wife’s parents for the summer, to come here in time for the start of the school year. Doing online dating as I usually do when away from family for some amusement. Set up… Read more »
@Rc “I think that short story also points out that I still have a lot of work on self-improvement in a masculine direction that I’ve got to do – I cannot imagine my wife pronouncing the same words.” Be careful there. I thought you were decent in SMV based on your former comments. What you have to be careful about is judging yourself based on your wife’s willingness to fuck you. Do not put yourself down, unless it is warranted. You not imagining your wife pronouncing the same words is quite irrelevant. You and she dug yourself into this hole.… Read more »
TheMarquis
What about this take: Just be honest. With her. Scary, yes. Risky? Not necessarily.
You and her both have plausible deniability. She has no incentive to out you as a parent of a prospective student.
What would she benefit by causing problems in the school system? She would be at risk doing that.
Treat it as a secret society.
Just be up front and tell her you want the best for your children. You that should resonate with her.
@SJF Straight to the point in your advice to @The Marquis, and brilliant in its elegant simplicity. Why worry about the need for subterfuge when direct honesty can cut through to the endgame? In my limited experience (and because I am a terrible liar) this kind of direct honesty works for me. @ The Marquis There is a ‘fear of loss’ principle in play here. Understandably you are worried that you have much to lose if this blows up in your face — but so, too, does the teacher. I am not sure how this works stateside, but in the… Read more »
The curse of the smart guy is that they can rationalize everything too much.
What would happen if you just don’t overthink stuff. And sweat the small stuff like ASDgamer. (no offense ASD….)
And by the way, don’t get me started on the false fantasy of bartendress server girl, try a hookup, based on grammar, logic and rhetoric. Facts, understanding and wisdom. Otherwise known as YGBFSM.
@j
Thanks a ton. Are there videos of other RSD guys which had good content on Game archived like this? Especially their hotseat full infield breakdowns. I cannot believe what RSD has turned into now!!
@ Palma Now that’s gonna take some thinking. Speaking of old, fat women and guys I don’t want to be around, one of my friends is always going to stuff like that, yoga, meditation groups, etc. Dragging me out to stuff like that has always been like pulling teeth and I’m not sure I can do that kinda stuff again. Definitely not my scene and most of the people I’ve met at “spiritual” places like that seem really avoidant and weird. Could just be me projecting, but I honestly don’t think so. There is a place that has an open… Read more »
Much thanks to both of you who commented. I haven’t been sleeping thinking about this. I hadn’t thought of that at all – the angle that she also has plenty to lose by sleeping with her student’s dad (even if it happened shortly before they joined etc). Basically I think there are two ways this can go wrong Option 1: She recognises me in school when my kids start in a couple of months and makes it a problem. For the reason SJF and Tantum have said, this is probably not going to be an issue – she may not… Read more »
@The Marquis My particular problem is that I tend to over-rationalise things …. or indulged in ‘manstering’, as a seasoned commentator in this forum once correctly identified and also correctly told me to stop! 🙂 I think that you are right in that you have no control over Option 2 … or possibly Option 1 for that matter. But, taking a leaf out of @Sentient’s excellent advice, why not try and apply the Platinum Rule: ‘Do whatever YOU want, whenever YOU want to do it.’ ? This may bring you some clarity, and @Sentient wisely notes that the Platinum Rule… Read more »
Asd The girl at the deli counter in my supermarket wants my dick. I know because I ordered a pound of pastrami, and she gave me 1.2 pounds. Re marquis situ – Interesting dilema, but it’s not actually a dilemma if you think about it. Just go all Eddie Murphy/shaggy and say ” it wasn’t me “, and stick to it. There is no proof to the contrary. Still wanting to bang this chick. No problem. I don’t believe a man, married or not, should deny himself willingly, from getting what he really wants. But is it what you want,… Read more »
@Blax
Old man, go see your ophthalmologist.
Marquis What’s up you 😈… Hot water is hot ain’t it? Enjoy it. That’s why you are doing it after all. To feel alive. Social circle is a different game. This is why I don’t do any online stuff and never hide my ring. Be authentic and in real life. Because it’s not the acts that cause as much trouble as the cover up. If you slept with her and she didn’t know you are married… She’s gonna be pissed…. And your wife will feel the repercussions. It will be subtle, probably something like she mentions to some co worker… Read more »
@SJF, thanks. no I don’t think I am low SMV, and I was not putting myself down with that comment. I was simply saying that I would be really surprised if she said the words in that little joke (“a wife should never…”), given her unwillingness to fuck.
she considers me a kept man. Which brings us back to dread.
Softek
“I never would’ve thought of that. ”
Time to break out Mystery Method and go through it.
Or PUA shorthand – instigate, isolate, escalate…
“She has 300 other dude’s hitting her profile she probably isn’t going to chase you down… Cats have different problems than dogs.” That’s the funny thing about ASD’s formulation about server girls. If they were worth banging, they have a thousand choices of men to bang. And you want to play long game as a stingy tipper and your physical and cognitive attributes? If she isn’t with a guy already and committed, then she would be defective anyway. Especially with ASD’s concern about STD’s. “Now is it wrong to want to bang her ? Not at all.” It’s not wrong… Read more »
@TheMarquis Having A Bad Day and Sentient – and others. Umm. Some reassurance please. Or a slap around the head if needed. https://giphy.com/gifs/cheezburger-slapping-funny-2nGfl4QfpCtW feelz like you’re alive, right?…lol Things generally going well with wife and kids – usual ups and downs but overall positive. props!… but i sense some drama ahead… if things are going too well… Moving to a new city with family. I came here alone for a month or two to clear the way and start work, and wife and kids staying with my wife’s parents for the summer, to come here in time for the start… Read more »
“If they were worth banging” “Nobody is saying pulling server girls isn’t possible.” …two questions nobody asked or cares about in this context…people are having problems following the discussion between Sentient and me…reading comprehension… “your getting dislikes only because your autistic server analysis is retarded lol.” …at least you’re discussing something tangentially relevant…saying something is retarded doesn’t make it so…especially from folks with reading comp issues… …the only question I care about is whether server girls might be sexually interested in their customers and how you can tell when they are and when they are just trying to get bigger… Read more »
better link
https://cheezburger.com/7613153280
good luck!
Asd Girls are girls are girls. You’re trying to ” figure out ” if one set is NAWALT or awalt. Stay out of bars and shit until you’ve spent 1000 hours observing women in the wild. I’ve been called ” honey ” and ” baby ” and ” sexy ” by servers in bars and restaurants, and just that alone never made me wonder about sex. Had sex with women that served me in some capacity, but the random polite server banter had nothing at all to do with it. They weren’t hitting on me for sex, it was about… Read more »
Blax
ASD has a big ego investment in thinking every girl who looks at him wants to bang him.
Of itself that’s not a bad frame.
But when you never act on anything you stick yourself into the realm of delusion.
Best not to talk about unless you are proving attraction.
@theasdgamer “I care about is whether server girls might be sexually interested in their customers and how you can tell when they are and when they are just trying to get bigger tips or some work-related reason” “when you never act on anything you stick yourself into the realm of delusion” 100% truth. You have to act on it. That’s what my wing told me when I asked him. If you find her attractive, you see the look in her eyes that she likes you back, and when talking to her you can feel the sexual tension in the air….you… Read more »
“ASD has a big ego investment in thinking every girl who looks at him wants to bang him.” Your game needs work. “Sure some girls (especially hired guns) are really good at faking it for big tips (or whatever reason they may have for faking it), but the only way to know for sure is to actually go for it. Bust a fucking move.” Been there, done that. Just not on server girls. In a bar. (As opposed to Blax’s deli. “I’ll have a reuben.”) Sometimes girls comply and sometimes not. Sentient’s advice assumes that I shouldn’t be flirting with… Read more »
“Had sex with women that served me in some capacity, but the random polite server banter had nothing at all to do with it. They weren’t hitting on me for sex, it was about providing decent service and tips.” …and it was about getting attention and validation…things all girls seek…and most girls working in service industries are extraverted and like being around people and chatting people up… …of course, I get this sort of thing, too, and it’s NBD, except when my radar goes off because something is a little hinky…like you’ve pinged a girl’s radar with some value demonstration… Read more »
Lmao.
Keep going man. This is the most fun I’ve had in the last half hour.
” …and it was about getting attention and validation…things all girls seek…and most girls working in service industries are extraverted and like being around people and chatting people up…” Lol, okay I will bite: Prove this statement to be TRUE. Most girls that are working, particularly in the service industry are not seeking ” validation “. They are seeking a steady paycheck. Most of these jobs require that one plays nice with the paying customer. Hell, even most strippers I’ve known aren’t particular extroverted, and they’re 80% naked. When I worked with strippers, I ran into quite a few guys… Read more »
Blaximus
I’ve been called ” honey ” and ” baby ” and ” sexy ” by servers in bars and restaurants, and just that alone never made me wonder about sex.
Last month on travel I charmed our way to a good table in a small restaurant. The pretty Jamaican hostess seated me last, saying “We’ll put Dah-dee right here” with a nice eye-contact look.
So?
It didn’t make the tip any bigger…
Blaximus
Keep going man. This is the most fun I’ve had in the last half hour.
Spergatron should be required to begin every comment in this section with “Dear Penthouse….”
” …and it was about getting attention and validation…things all girls seek…and most girls working in service industries are extraverted and like being around people and chatting people up…” Lol, okay I will bite: Prove this statement to be TRUE. Ok. But first tell me what sort of empirical test or study or logical reasoning would constitute adequate proof. For you. “Most girls that are working, particularly in the service industry are not seeking ” validation “. They are seeking a steady paycheck. Most of these jobs require that one plays nice with the paying customer.” …and intraverts are so… Read more »
“…and intraverts are so much better than extraverts at playing nice (depends)…and girls only focus on their paycheck when they work…( more do than don’t) they turn off standard girl motivators like seeking validation and attention…( they can )and girls working at bars don’t choose to work at bars so that they have access to hot guys…( Dog Logic )” “…Blax, you are hilarious…do you ever watch girls at bars???!!!???” You got me there. Not a huge bar guy. Just watched and interacted heavily with women all my life, particularly the last 45 years. “…I go to Wally World and… Read more »
“…and intraverts are so much better than extraverts at playing nice (depends)” …you telling us something, my friend? …and girls only focus on their paycheck when they work…( more do than don’t) …at bars on a weekend night? lol they turn off standard girl motivators like seeking validation and attention…( they can ) …if they aren’t attracted to a guy…then they can’t… …and girls working at bars don’t choose to work at bars so that they have access to hot guys…( Dog Logic )” …not really…most girls working at bars are working part time in addition to a full time… Read more »
Server anecdote from last night…a pretty bartender I actually like got me a drink…the usual (whiskey neat and water separate, and she remembered the water)…then ignored me when I wanted water later, so I met the new girl…later, a drunk girl opened me and the first bartender got me water and I said that she just plays me every time and I fall for it every time (I was playing dumb) and she laughed and pranced and gloated over her prowess for the drunk girl and I played along. I forget the order of events, but the drunk girl was… Read more »
Hey guys! I am posting my stuff here as I would be grateful to get advice from guys who are all on their own path to improving themselves but don’t have a product or course to sell. I came across Game sometime back. And by Game I mean London Style Direct Daygame. I thought that was what Game was and did not know of other schools of Game and it looked great on youtube so I fell in love with that style. I am an Indian and at that point was living in India, I got an opportunity to travel… Read more »
Rc, SJF mentioned to me offline that you are back and I’m glad for that. Some thoughts…. MRP and red pill generally attempts to explain human nature with empirical psychology-ness though a masculine narrative. TRM helped me understand how I was actively frustrating my masculine nature for the sake of social acceptance. What MRP fails to explain is this: Rc, you can become hyper-clever manipulating your wife’s insecurity index…so clever that you can dial up or down her fear of nothingness (dread) at will by commission or omission. You can manipulate AF sex out of her. You can manipulate obedience… Read more »
@Ehintellect
Interesting post and advice for @RC.
But I am curious (as I have a good friend in similar territory: he is married, loves his wife immensely, is an excellent provider, and yet she has no desire for him and has told him as much).
How do you do this — ie have a fulfilling and sex-filled marriage?
For my part, I never succeeded…
Many thanks.
TantumErgo
Two things to add to my anecdote:
The girl said, “You’re so fucking hot!” (lol, she was so fucking drunk)
The girl said, “You’re not going to fucking leave me.” (my first attempt to depart…I was facing Scorned Girl ™ drama and needed a different exit)
“Think of it this way: AF sex is a negotiation…fuck me or you don’t get my presence. BB sex is a negotiation…fuck me or you don’t get stuff. Both AF an BB are negotiated sex.”
I choose door number three: she fucks me and departs and doesn’t need my presence and will fuck me even if she doesn’t get my presence.
“There is no such thing as RP desire sex.”
Relatively true if you’ve never experienced it.
@theasdgamer
“Door number three” = The Holy Grail.
I remember clearly in my early days with Babushka, she went back to visit her parents in Eastern Europe.
She told me that she would try and hook up with someone so that she could ‘get you [me] out of my [her] head.’ (I suspect she did.)
My reply: ‘You can fuck as many people as you like, but it will never get me out of your head.’
Her: ‘You’ re right. ‘
Followed by:’ You can do anything that you want to me. ‘
I did. 😊
TantumErgo
@Palmsailor
Yes: I am in London, and very much like to talk it through.
Tuesdays / Thursdays and Fridays are good for me. 😊
TantumErgo
Way to go, Tantum!
Now, rinse and repeat.
@theadsgamer
Thank you. 😊
I totally lost the plot with Babushka… but I am learning.
TantumErgo
@ gamenoob I also saw the direct London Daygame stuff on YouTube, like this one: I have no idea what to make of it. Since I’ve never actually gone out and field-tested it, any “critique” I’d have of it would be purely mental masturbation. I’d be curious if guys here have successfully used this model and whether it’s good advice to follow or not. I understand the concept that saying “you look nice” is “pedestalizing” but having never done this in real life = mental masturbation. IOW, I’m not about to critique guys going out and trying ANYTHING while I’m… Read more »
Interesting post and advice for @RC. But I am curious (as I have a good friend in similar territory: he is married, loves his wife immensely, is an excellent provider, and yet she has no desire for him and has told him as much). How do you do this — ie have a fulfilling and sex-filled marriage? One of the things I noticed along the way with my journey and reconstruction, is that RP is a Process and praxeology (what works) first. It contains useful tools in a toolbox. You use those tools to modify relationship patterns and to self… Read more »
@SJF
Thank you very much for this — and especially this:
“At this point it was about self differentiation, stepping outside of the relationship. Then using self differentiation tools, and then stepping back into the relationship arena a better man. And not requiring her to change unless she wanted to. Letting her be responsive to the better man.”
Passion, authenticity and dynamism: the three pillars, then to becoming ‘the better man’… from which all else stems.
TantumErgo
I choose door number three: she fucks me and departs and doesn’t need my presence and will fuck me even if she doesn’t get my presence.
Yes. That is the definition of self differentiation. Your wife can stand on her own two feet and feel comfortable with herself.
@gamenoob, Softek Read Bacchus’ intro to day game: https://nextasf.com/forum/nextasf/general/311854-intro-to-day-game and then his day game Lay Reports 1 “There’s a lone girl sitting on a bench. She’s looking at her phone. Shopping bags around her wrists. Took a seat next to her. At a respectable distance. I’m glued to my phone as I sit on the bench. Giving her the opportunity to digest my vibe freely. From her perspective, I’m just a well-dressed window shopper. Resting his legs and glued to his phone like everybody else. But with noticeably better body language and presence. Relaxed posture and an almost poetic stillness.… Read more »
It’s easier to not get shot at than it is to dodge bullets
kfg, when you’re in a dancing show, there’s always some smartass gonna pull out a piece and tell you to dance as they blast away at your feet
@Palmsailor
I’ll be there. 😊
Will have a top-pocket handkerchief in my jacket / suit.
E-mail for comms is in name signature.
TantumErgo
Now someone’s gonna say that I didn’t get my fingers wet, so it doesn’t count. You don’t really, really know if the drunk broad was DTF until then. Maybe the bitch was just grabbing your cock because she was bored and running your hands over her boobs and ass because they itched. And maybe she was trying to ram her tongue down your throat as part of a dare. Maybe the drunk broad was leading you on saying that she was gonna ride you all night and saying that you couldn’t leave. Maybe. But probably? Naah. When it comes to… Read more »
Dalai Lama laying down red pill truths for women
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/dalai-lama-successor-sexist-comment-165529899.html
“If a female Dalai Lama comes, she should be more attractive.” If not, “people, I think prefer, not see her, that face.”
I guess his holiness really is enlightened.
@TantumErgo Lucky Man, you. You get to meet up with Palma. https://youtu.be/MH6TJU0qWoY Happiness More or less It’s just a change in me Something in my liberty Oh, my, my Happiness Coming and going I watch you look at me Watch my fever growing I know just where I am But how many corners do I have to turn? How many times do I have to learn All the love I have is in my mind? Well, I’m a lucky man With fire in my hands Happiness Something in my own place I’m stood here naked Smiling, I feel no disgrace… Read more »
@Tantum Ergo
I don’t know if I remember all of your narrative correctly or exactly.
You had the Babushka thing. Mail order bride?
Where do you stand now, and what do you need help with in going forward?
What do you feel you could do best? What do you think is your worst that you need help with?
@SJF Ha! Ha! Like your comment about Babushka being ‘a mail order bride?’ 😂 You had some v e r y good advice for me, particularly with regard to my having had no frame in that relationship, as well as looking out for the red flags of someone with BPD. Here is the sorry tale…. https://therationalmale.com/field-reports-comment-page-2-comments/comment-page-118/#comment-274264 As for now…. :: General Pluses and Minuses Weaknesses: I become too emotionally attached to the women that I want to fuck, and, with Babushka, I (genuinely) fell in love with the wrong woman, and failed to establish any frame. Strengths: I am relatively… Read more »
@SJF
https://therationalmale.com/field-reports-comment-page-2-comments/comment-page-122/#comment-277196
Yes indeed. 😊
@Tantum
“I have only managed to bang her once, and she hasrrecently flaked on my trying to see her again… and at the last minute.”
Why do you think she flaked? And at the last minute?
“Bitches, take a number.” Why does this work with girls?
You talk about plates…I hope you’re actually spinning several right now.
@the asdgamer “Why do you think she flaked? And at the last minute?” She is a student and lives in the suburbs (I live in the city) with her parents and brother …. but that’s not it. 🙂 She was down to meet, and the weather on Sunday was very good where I live, and I had sold her on the idea of going to my local park and enjoying the sunshine to start with …. I am new territory for her, being considerably older, and she has previously complained that when dating boys of her own age she has… Read more »
“she has previously complained that when dating boys of her own age she has felt pressured into having sex with them. That could be it, a form of ‘buyer’s remorse’” …don’t believe her bullshit about being pressured about sex…that’s just anti-slut defense talk…she wants sex and she also wants to feel like she’s a nice girl…and she’s trying to get you to believe that she’s a nice girl… “But … she may not be sold on this, and her flaking some 10 hours before we were due to meet is merely a shit test.” …not a shit test…right now, she… Read more »
@theasdgamer Many thanks for your reply and helpful advice: https://therationalmale.com/field-reports-comment-page-2-comments/comment-page-122/#comment-277246 “…don’t believe her bullshit about being pressured about sex…that’s just anti-slut defense talk…she wants sex and she also wants to feel like she’s a nice girl…and she’s trying to get you to believe that she’s a nice girl…” Understood, and I won’t. But do I just ignore the ‘nice girl’ disguise and keep my comms with her purely sexualised? I haven’t reacted to her blowing me off at the last minute, and my inclination is just to leave it hanging while I scout for other options. “… right now, she… Read more »
@Tantum “She was down to meet, and the weather on Sunday was very good where I live, and I had sold her on the idea of going to my local park and enjoying the sunshine to start with” Ehh kinda too early for this. This is what’s known as a “boyfriend behavior (bb).” Going for a stroll in the park. With fuckbuddies, especially girls that you’ve only fucked once, you wanna follow the ‘fuck first, ask questions later’ model (opposite being the relationship model: relationship activity (dinner/movies THEN sex). Meaning: text her to come back to your place. Then after… Read more »
@j “Ehh kinda too early for this. This is what’s known as a “boyfriend behavior (bb).” Going for a stroll in the park. With fuckbuddies, especially girls that you’ve only fucked once, you wanna follow the ‘fuck first, ask questions later’ model (opposite being the relationship model: relationship activity (dinner/movies THEN sex). Meaning: text her to come back to your place. Then after sex, you can go for that stroll in the park/go out and get breakfast if you want. By doing actions that can be perceived as bb, you start signaling to the girl that you may want to… Read more »
““Young girls are very in the moment. In that they make plans at the last minute and don’t stick to plans they agree to in advanced.”
Older women are the same way.
@theadsgamer @j ““Young girls are very in the moment. In that they make plans at the last minute and don’t stick to plans they agree to in advanced.” “Older women are the same way.” So what’s the trigger for this flakiness and inability to commit? Is it because women — both young and older — innately think that they might have a better last-minute option? Or is it a method to weaken a man’s frame and get control (a shit test)? I have had it in the past where some of the women I was seeing would never be on… Read more »
“So what’s the trigger for this flakiness and inability to commit? Is it because women — both young and older — innately think that they might have a better last-minute option? Or is it a method to weaken a man’s frame and get control (a shit test)? I have had it in the past where some of the women I was seeing would never be on time. My response was simply to wait about 10 minutes max, and then take off without explanation. Whenever they gave me shit for it, I would explain that I had other things to do,… Read more »
@EhIntellect, @SJF, thanks. I want to say, after a while I think and read about these things, I’ve seen a difference in me. In the early posts, I was asking more about cheat codes. What do I do if she says X/does Y. I’ve had more of those tests, even in the last days, and maybe I’ll report – but I can see that cheat codes for a better negotiating position help up to a point. Having a stack of stimulus-response routines is an unnatural way to live after a while. This does not mean they don’t help, and I… Read more »
Did yareally promote direct game or indirect game? Going though his old blog trying to get an idea of what one of his FR’s would look like, it’s hard to get a picture in my head based on the apparent conflict between some of his posts. When he gave little snippets into his game, and basically what ‘game’ is, he’d always write things like ”“YOU. Who ARE you? ” “Oh, uhh, I’m Sally?” “Well Sally, I saw you from across the room and had to come say hello. I think we’re going to have to have a million babies together.”… Read more »
@j
Wow thanks a ton for that post. I have read it thoroughly and went out and tried that style of daygame today. Will write about what happened. Maybe you could analyse it. Will go out tomorrow as well to try it and write my observations together. Thanks a ton!
“Did yareally promote direct game or indirect game?”
Yes.
😂
@ford lol. believe it or not, this is actually one of the most frequently asked questions by rookies in multiple forums/blogs. so don’t feel bad about being confused. I’m sorry YaReally didn’t do a good enough job of explaining when to go indirect/direct. Or what those each style even looks like besides specific opening lines. So first, you’ll want to know what PUAs actually mean by running “indirect” game. Here’s my (username: Velasco) comment on indirect game: https://nextasf.com/forum/nextasf/night-game/332404-direct-and-indirect?p=332422#post332422 (be sure to check out page 2 as well and read @skills360 and @Logic&Reason’s comments). Check out this really good quick 5… Read more »
FR for yeareally (although It doesn’t look like he posts here anymore) First open (me and 3 friends) was on 3 girls sitting down. I was just like ‘hi, I’m ford’, and then one of them was like ”Sorry, we’re trying to have a private convo” and more or less blew us all out. Tried to get them to talk for a few seconds but they weren’t interested Next open was on 2 VERY hot young girls. Like solid 9’s. My friend opened this set and was like ‘hi, how’s your night going?’ and he got a brutal ”you can… Read more »
”you can fuck off!” my reply: …so you’re already bringing up fucking…that’s a bit fast for my taste… [enforcing your boundaries in a humorous way] Option 1: …then maybe they back off and apologize and explain the situation, in which case you engage them Option 2: …they tell you to go to hell, in which case you tell them to have a good evening, you backturn, then waft fumes from your ass in their direction as you slowly depart, without looking at them…you get extra drama points with other girls watching you do this to hotties…they can tell that you’re… Read more »
@ford “I got speaking to her about dating etc, trying to sexualise the convo slightly and trying to make it more man to woman etc. Laser eyes etc”. Good topics. But kind of a broad subject. What specifically were you talking to her about dating and how did you sexualize the convo? and how was she responding? it’s safe to assume, that if she was responding well to your sexual conversation (and contributing to it with more than one sentence (“oh ya that makes sense”)…giving you some good insights about her dating life (we all know girl’s favorite thing to… Read more »
Good thread by @Neils on spotting less obvious (covert dangers) bad LTR partners https://twitter.com/NielsKnk/status/1145617917146476545 The dead giveaways: 1) Dysfunctional family: If their family hates them, or is severely dysfunctional, the odds of them being a covert danger is much higher. 2) Friends: If they have almost no friends or have no long term friends, they are much more likely to be a covert danger. 3) Unstable: If they are always on the move, can’t keep a job for long etc, they’re more likely to be covert dangers. Forced to move around whenever exposed. “Make sure you have a strong network… Read more »
@j Great post and superb thread: ‘Covert’ versus ‘Overt’ dangers: https://twitter.com/NielsKnk/status/1145617917146476545/photo/1 While it would be good to avoid treading on the ‘dynamite’ in the first place by solid and selective filtering, the unfortunate truth for those of us who veer towards being AFCs, is that sometimes you HAVE to have it blow-up in your face in order learn the often very painful lesson. @neils makes the excellent points that 20/20 hindsight is a beautiful thing, and that, if you fall in love (with the wrong woman) – as I did (Babuskha), love effectively blindsides you anyway. :-() Key takeaway for… Read more »
J, why are you bringing up LTRs?
Ford: “I open with something like ”Hey girls! My friends are being boring so I thought i’d come and see what you’re about for a few seconds”. Surprisingly good reaction.”
…cuz they think you’re retarded for dissing your friends…so they think you might amuse them a little…as a court fool…not high value…
…you should build up your friends as valuable…just not as valuable as you are…”Joe is a MMA contender…he has my back…which is why I let him buy me drinks…” [you punch Joe in the arm and grin at him]
Guys, it’s the birthday of a girl I’m dating for almost a year. She’s been trying to pin me down after hearing that I got a job. What’s your opinio? Should I wish her on her birthday?
Victor
What have you done for girls in the past?
How’s that worked?
Google “heartiste Skittles man” and “dick in a box” for ideas…
Sentient, I have bought a necklace(cheap one) for a girl once, which she tried to return but I didn’t take back.
With this girl I’m dating, I haven’t done much monetarily other than spending a few euros on dates. But we’ve been in touch for a year and knows each other well.
Can you send the links of those two search terms you mentioned. There are lots and I’m confused
“Direct openers like that can come across as very needy and a DLV. In this case you bounced from one failure to the next and every woman in the place probably sensed it, plus your desperation pinged their radar.” If your body language shows desperation, that’s true. It all depends on your body language. I was asking several women to dance and all were declining. When two that were looks-challenged declined haughtily, I snorted in derision, backturned them, and moved on. Then I asked another couple of girls to dance. They also declined. I moved on. No big deal. About… Read more »
It seems that the archives of Heartiste at heartiste.org are missing April 2008 through December 2012.
Here was Be a Skittles Man from the internet archive wayback machine.
https://web.archive.org/web/20130218144434/https://heartiste.wordpress.com/2009/05/19/be-a-skittles-man/
@Victor: I remember Skittles Man which SJF linked for you.
I don’t remember reading about “Dick in a box”, but that just instantly evokes the mental imagery required, so…
@Victor: another idea from Heartiste is a wrapped box of condoms.
https://heartiste.net/drive-by-teases-2/
@J -”What specifically were you talking to her about dating and how did you sexualize the convo? and how was she responding?” Just how she meets guys, what her type is, oldest guy she’s banged etc. She was responding like she was super comfortable etc, but other than that, hard to tell. I didn’t sense she was into me, for exmaple, despite how friendly and social she was. I felt like she was just one of them girls who was happy to chat ”A simple, “hey lets go find “handsome dude” for your friend” would have sufficed.” Unfortunately, the one… Read more »
@IAS have your tried any of these? How has it worked for you?
@ford “Just how she meets guys, what her type is, oldest guy she’s banged” “I felt like she was just one of them girls who was happy to chat” This is good stuff, but these are surface level topics. You gotta go DEEPER into these if you want the desired effect (from “happy to chat” to “wow this guy is really interesting/turning me on”). “Have you ever fucked someone who wasn’t your type?” “Have you ever met someone who was your type and you really wanted to bang him but then he turned out to be super boring? or you… Read more »
@Blaximus
Last week on a commercial flight a cute flight attendant put her hand on my shoulder and called me “Honey” as she
gave me a soft drink. I was just sitting there, obviously she was so into me, and we weren’t even dancing!
I’m so set for female companions…for the rest of my life!
@gamenoob @ford @studentofgame
Good day game infield from Alex of UMP:
Besides his verbals (what topics he brings up and how he transitions into them. what frames he’s setting), pay close attention to his non-verbals (body language, bedroom eyes, smile (when he smiles and doesn’t smile) pregnant pauses), and fundamentals/looksmax (clothes, hairstyle, facial hair, tattoo (not really a fundamental, but nice to have a visible one so girls can ask you about it) and implement them.
Lol @ the skinny jean shit.
Jesus, what’s happened to men ( rhetorical ).
The struggle is real.
Don’t dress like a bitch though….
Where’s HABD with the ” FI’s hand on your shoulder “??
Hey AR, are you still incel?
“I open every girl I want with an indirect situational opener (some guys say its hard to think on your feet. but I find it pretty easy when you’re in a really good flow…a couple of drinks and opening a few guys and girls in the venue before approaching that one girl you really want)” “I open every girl I want with an indirect situational opener (some guys say its hard to think on your feet. but I find it pretty easy when you’re in a really good flow…a couple of drinks and opening a few guys and girls in… Read more »
Lmao. IDGAF who’s wearing that shit. It’s feminine.
Cookie cutter bullshit. Trends – but this shit is a feminine inspired trend. Skinny tight ass jeans, or jeans hanging off your ass with your drawers showing, all of that shit is feminine inspired.
Plus, drop T levels a few hundred points and guys are more amenable to the feminine frame.
Feminine Frame.
For females.
God help us if women start saying that clown noses are sexy.
^^ Especially at 2:57 forward.
Video from 2014. Feminism evidently won this battle.
not gonna get into this gay shit…the point I was making is to not look like a slob. And take pride in your outer appearance.
Alex for example is sporting a Tommy Hilfiger sweatshirt, powerbeats hanging around his neck, black ripped skinny jeans, pf flyers(?) and a modern hairstyle. Aka lookmaxxed.
https://www.instagram.com/mrjunho3/
https://www.instagram.com/magic_fox/
https://www.instagram.com/menwithstreetstyle/
If you don’t like skinny jeans, like if you they gay, don’t like how you look in them, or your thighs are too big for them like me, then just don’t wear them. Simple.
Agree. Don’t be a fag.
@j
Thanks for the video. I have reread Bacchus’s post thrice to internalize everything. I never knew about that forum. It has amazing posts, but it seems like it is shutting down and I cannot register as a new member and I am also not able to view a lot of the posts. Have you copied the great posts from on there or is there a backup for them. Would be great to read and learn from them.
@Victor: I have tried some pretty much like those on the list (without having read the list before) and others that have the same idea.
Another good one that @Palmasailor mentioned a few times is dipping a finger on a drink (preferably her drink) and flicking it to (minorly) splash her face.
But you should really try to understand the underlying idea, not just use specific examples you read on a list!
@gamenoob Yeah unfortunately you can’t register anymore because they’ve pulled the plug. I don’t know when the new forum will be ready. But I’ll be sure to link it here when its up. In the meantime, here’s a couple of posts, the member of the site found most helpful: https://nextasf.com/forum/nextasf/general/334805-what-are-your-top-posts-from-nextasf (I recommend just going through @POB and @Skills360’s links) And here’s a couple of more posts from Bacchus that I’ve found helpful: https://nextasf.com/forum/nextasf/general/328645-the-euro-step-attn-glow (read the comments as well) https://nextasf.com/forum/nextasf/general/327187-breaking-rapport-game-vs-connection-game-confusion-pls-help?p=327200#post327200 (his post is down in the comments. Explaining the difference between compliance and attraction) https://soundcloud.com/girlschase/26-daniel-adebayo-verbal-game-and-consistency – his GirlChase interview. Giving an… Read more »
@j: thanks for the link to that interview, good material.
@Everyone: I recommend listening to the interview. It is under an hour and several interesting verbal game strategies are discussed with specific examples given.
@Palma
“I’ve been banging her on and off since November and she didn’t even know / or even ask up to this point”.
well yeah i mean you’re her fuckbuddy and she’s already got a bf. Why would she care about your relationship status up to this point lol. Now that you’ve shown her some provider value (in addition to your AF value), she’s thinking about potentially monkey branching.
Field Report: Serendipity I was at my old stomping ground. I saw a bunch of old friends. One girl has a new bf and they were leaving early and she wanted a dance before they left. I saw some guys I don’t see a lot and we hung out some. Met the new gf of one of my buddies. My buddies and I were fucking around and I was giving some of them shit. I did the same with another group of buddies. I saw one girl who’s not a friend but follows me extremely well. Mid 20s–cold, yet sexy,… Read more »