Old Lies

Apparently no one has bothered to let this poor sap (I don’t know who he is) know that the “Toxic” masculinity  narrative has now been replaced with “masculinity is toxic“. I find it interesting that when it comes to the mainstream societal understandings of what masculinity once was and what it is now – or what the mainstream believes it should be now – much of these interpretations are based on fanciful, anachronistic, ideas of what contributed to our understanding of masculinity now. I’ve gone into my own definitions of what constitutes ‘conventional’ masculinity for men many times before so I won’t belabor it now, however, as the popular narrative changes I’ve noticed some very common presumptions that masculinity critics like to use and are repeated over and over.

The first of these, and the most common, is the deliberate misconception that a boy’s learning to be masculine never left the 1950-60s. In the wake of the Nikolas Cruz shooting this rationale surfaced quite a bit. It still is. The idea is that boys are born as these tender, delicate souls, all naturally ready to emote and sensate like precious little girls – that is until the nebulous evil ‘patriarchy’ gets ahold of them and batters them into “being tough”, not crying and told to stop being such pussies. This is the old anachronism that presupposes western society never left the ‘macho tough guy’ preconditioning of boys to raise them to be these future murderers, wife beaters and misogynists.

This is, of course, the “boys are broken” narrative I addressed in Good Humans. It’s kind of ironic when you think that this narrative would have us believe boys naturally wanting to be boys is a net social negative and it takes some strong intervention in their upbringing to turn them into good humans. So what is it? Are boys being their natural selves by wanting to be rambunctious, risk taking, shit-giving, masculine boys, or are they naturally these tender little emo-beings coming fresh out of the womb only to have their ‘genuine’ sensitive emotional souls crushed by “hyper-masculine” fathers, male teachers and school coaches. This is one of the more stupid, but deliberate, paradoxes the Village and the Feminine Imperative conveniently switch between as circumstances require yet one more anti-masculine response.

Lies for Boys

You can see this confusion in the above Tweet.

Our society teaches boys to “toughen up”.

Actually no, the feminine-primary social order that has been systematically feminizing boys into feminine-identifying men for the past 50 years does nothing of the kind. Since the mid-seventies the cultural narrative took a hard turn to the feminine-correct in raising boys into pacified ‘harmless’ men. We’re going on five generations of telling boys it is incumbent upon them to get in touch with their mythical feminine sides if they want to evolve beyond ‘traditional masculinity’. There is no ‘toughening’ being taught to boys in a female primary education system that teaches boys in a manner that presumes they are defective girls.

…which is okay, but not okay when “toughening up” also means suppressing feelings.

Feelings are perhaps the only thing boys are being taught to prioritize in their feminine-primary educations today. This fact deserves a bit of explanation here. Male and female humans process emotions differently. Women in particular process negative emotions in a much different way than men. Men tend to prioritize information through a filter of rational discernment first and then sort out how they feel about that information in an emotional context. Women are much the opposite; girls process information through an emotional filter first and then sort out what the information actually means to them (and after that, how it might affect others). If this sounds like the essays I’ve written about how men’s and women’s communications methods differ you’re not too far off. Men prioritize the content (information) of a conversation while women prioritize the context (the feels she gets) from a conversation. This is how our brains work, and when one method isn’t socially favored above the other both methods can be complementary to the other.

But in a feminine-primary social order this is not how things work. As I mentioned, for the past 50+ years our educational system has shifted to favor the learning methodologies of girls at the expense of boys. This ‘girls style’ teaching has been the standard for so long now that we largely take it for granted that it is the only correct style of teaching. Today, men account for less than 25% of all teachers in the United States. In the UK it’s 25% and n Canada only 17% of elementary school teachers are male. Teaching is a female dominated profession and especially for younger kids. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics only 2% of pre-K and kindergarten teachers, and 18% of elementary and middle-school teachers, are men. How do you think stats like these affect the learning methodologies applied to boys and girls?

Yet still this lie that boys are the victims of some overwhelming toxic masculinity in their upbringing is the first reflexive explanation we hear from women and feminized men when a kid commits a criminal act. Why?

Lies for Equalism

Because it sounds right. It sounds like it should be right. The presumption is that boys are, in fact, girls; or at least they should be a functional equivalent of girls when it comes to educations. Over the past 50 years the baseless presumptions of blank-slate egalitarian equalism has not only inserted its lies into our social consciousness, but also into our presumptions about educating kids. I’ll repeat, men and women are biologically and psychologically different and boys and girls are equally different. The ways they learn are distinct to their sex. Yet for the past 4 generations egalitarian equalism has convinced (mostly female) educators that boys and girls are functional equals and gender differences are learned rather than innate.

While equalism informs (mostly female) teachers that boys and girls are the same, the teaching methodology that works best for girls and women is the predominant one today and for the recent past generations. The only way to justify this method as the universal one is to presume that boys are the same as girls – just ‘defective’ girls that must be taught to quash their innate maleness. If boys and girls are presumed to be blank-slate equals then it must follow that boys are just as emotion-prioritizing and sensitive as any girl, and it is through a process of an imagined patreo-misogyny social conditioning that boys psychologically cover over their “true” natures – that of precious little (defective) girls. In essence the equalist belief is that all babies are born as little equal blank-slates, but the ideal template for those blank-slates is a female nature irrespective of the sex of the child.

When a boy’s real, masculine, inborn nature expresses itself the first thing it meets in this equalist-but-feminine-primary education is derision and shame. For as much as boys would be boys they are taught that they aren’t good for being so. They’re encouraged to self-repress, self-deprecate their gender and self-police their brothers. They’re taught that the correct way to think is to emote like girls because that’s correct for the template of a “good human”. Despite the female-centric teaching boys innate nature still find ways for boys to be boys and when this happens an egalitarian (feminine-primary) social order presume the ‘bad behavior’ must be the result of the influence of an evil patriarchy that truly hasn’t existed in the way they believe it does for 50 some odd years.

 

As I’ve detailed in past essays, society only sees fathers as tolerable and superfluous when it comes to raising boys. Single mothers are celebrated as super-human and in the equalist lie that would have us believe that women can not only ‘have it all’ but they can ‘do it all’ we rarely question the necessity of a masculine influence in a child’s life. We give it lip service and parrot back the need for a man to “step up and take responsibility as a parent”. The message to dads is always “do better”, because the pretense for fathers is that they are inherently irresponsible and ‘broken’ just like all boys are.

The Village might even concede that a father is some advantage to a child, but ultimately he’s superfluous – that is until that kid is involved in some kind of criminality. Then the questions become “Where was this kid’s father? Why wasn’t he around to teach this kid some discipline and respect for human life?” The children of single mothers are overwhelmingly more likely to be come involved in criminality, but we don’t look at her half-measure parenting as a possible cause. Remember, she’s a super-hero and blameless, so any blame for this kid’s acts fall on the shoulders of a weak or absent father. Then fathers are necessary. Then the kid needed to ‘toughen up’ and dad should’ve taught it to him. And all of this comes full circle and feeds into the idea of father’s inherent incompetence again.

Lies for ‘Defective Girls’

The next lie is that boys can be,…

…both tough and fragile, vulnerable and resilient. Being vulnerable doesn’t affect your manliness.

I’ve written a lot about the lie of transvaluation and  Vulnerability in the past, but this was really in terms of how women perceive men and require strength and dominance. Another aspect of masculinity that is encoded into women’s mental firmware is to seek out men with superior competency. A woman just is, a man must become is the first maxim of a man accepting his Burden of Performance. Part of this masculine competency involves strength, know-how and determination; all things that have been replaced with feminine-primary emotionalism and naval gazing for boys.

Men are expected to know how to do everything and what they do not know, what they are not competent in is one criteria of how they are judged by women. A lot of guys might think, “So the fuck what? I don’t base my self-worth on the opinions of women.” As well you shouldn’t, but it doesn’t change the truth that if you don’t know how to change a tire when you get flat, or you need another man who does know how to do it to change it for you, a woman sees you as less competent – and by extension less capable of providing her with the security she needs from a masculine ideal. Women evolved to see men as a Jack of all trades, master of some.

A man’s vulnerability (taught to him as a child by his female-primary teachers) most definitely affects his manliness. Vulnerability is, by definition, a weakness. It is a flaw in the design, a chink in the armor and vulnerabilities will be exploited by enemies and rivals to ensure that man fails while a stronger one succeeds in all things. This is Darwinism so simple that to question it seems illogical, but in our equalist utopia toughness and fragility find no contradiction; vulnerability and resilience are bed partners. Again, we must consider that this illogical balance can only exist in the female ‘good human’ template and the idea that everything is learned and nothing is innate about male and female humans. Promoting the idea that ‘vulnerability doesn’t affect manliness’ presumes that the person declaring it is in some way an authority on a manliness that has been already demonized and conditioned out of our boys today.

They hate the very idea that a boy might act in accordance with an inborn masculine proclivity. They hate the idea that a boy might learn to be tough and resilient at the expense of a vulnerability (weakness) because it contradicts the equalist belief set. They hate the idea that boys and girls have innately, biologically, different ways of dealing with emotions that don’t align with their belief in a blank-slate. To force them to accept this would be to force them to abandon deeply ego-invested beliefs that they themselves had conditioned into them by the same feminine-primary education.

Boys don’t naturally emote like girls, but when they refuse to align with the female-correct way of emoting we say that some patriarchal macho man, somewhere, in some movie, in some song, in some household taught that kid not to feel. He somehow learned that allowing his emotions to rule over him, to be vulnerable, to prioritize his feelings above his sense of rational self is what it actually is – a weakness that in our evolutionary past was far likelier to get him killed than to earn the praise of his equalist teachers.

Boys are simply not as emotional as girls – our brains did not evolve that way – but because we value the feminine above the masculine today we say this kid is doing it wrong. We say he learned to be an asshole from his macho dad or he learned to love firearms because of the latest rap song or a toxically masculine society that doesn’t exist. A kid like Nikolas Cruz was bound to happen in a world that teaches boys to prioritize feelings above rationality. He was taught like a defective girl. He never learned the masculine inspired discipline, determination and resiliency because all that conflicts with the lie that vulnerability is ever a strength. All that conflicts with his feminine-primary upbringing.

As such, these ‘defective girls’ are unequipped to handle the rejection of a girlfriend. The participation trophy generation, the one where everyone’s a winner and no one ever has to deal with defeat, never teaches these ‘defective girls’ what to do when they finally do taste a bitter defeat. They never learned how to come back from it because that would mean admitting that vulnerability and emotionalism (the female-correct way to handle it) are in fact weaknesses. So, predictably, a ‘defective girl’ like Nikolas Cruz does what any petulant teenage girl would – he has an emotional outburst. Only his outburst consists of gunning down 17 kids with an assault rifle.

The answer to incidents like this doesn’t lie in gun control or further feminization of boys. It lies in reimagining how we educate boys and how we see masculinity as a net positive that can deter exactly this kind of emotional outburst. If you truly want these shootings to stop it’s time we embrace real men teaching real toughness and resilience in our boys. It’s time we teach boys like they will become tough, strong, invulnerable young men we may need to provide future generations with a much needed security. And the time where we’ll need them is coming faster than anyone today really thinks.

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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6 years ago

[…] Old Lies […]

boulderhead
6 years ago

He he super human indeed,my story mirrors Sun Wukong’s and Blaq Pill. The super human way she would rip my arm out of the socket while beating me with whatever was available, first until I would stop crying then later until i would start. My brother and I were kept in the garage on old sagged out WW2 metal bunks,cuz boys are tough, he was taught to despise his father and anything masculine including me. as I was older and couldn’t remember (although being constantly reminded ) any abuse at my fathers hand, the brain washing didn’t take in my… Read more »

boulderhead
6 years ago

Totally nailed it Rollo, the strong male mentors that i sought out are the men that saved me from a terrible fate. I believe that male bashing has gotten to the point that the young men of today have no inclination to seek out mentors and only hold ridicule for traditionaly male endeavors.

It looks as if now we need to be even stronger in the second half of our lives than was required in the begining. As you say coming on fast.

Mineter
Mineter
6 years ago

Women often don’t appear to know how to play the “long” game. As much as the FI would like to indoctrinate young males to be vulnerable and emotive, most young men will eventually hear the penny drop when they recognise that their reward for being like that is rejection, censure, shaming etc. Kids invariably learn to lie when they connect unpleasant consequences when being truthful. Why does it take so long to learn the same lesson about vulnerability? What’s the answer? Do we need a grass roots subversive movement to teach boys that one should never show vulnerability to strangers,… Read more »

Michael Makk
Michael Makk
6 years ago

I have read a lot of your work and this post like all the rest is spot on. I know that you have stated that you feel this shift in society happened organically – but could it really? Doesn’t it feel like it would take both men and women push hard to change laws and media and entertainment to the point were the house is holding the cards? I have been following The Great Awakening movement and saw an interesting theory about a potential group that uses the wives of powerful men held in compromise to direct policy change. Google… Read more »

rugby11
rugby11
6 years ago

“Feelings are perhaps the only thing boys are being taught to prioritize in their feminine-primary educations today. ”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Tuy6u7TtHo
Such as i from birth to now… Feel… Feel… Feel…

Pinelero
Pinelero
6 years ago

These sentiments about the role and masculine influence of fathers benefiting their kids are advocated by proponents of shared parenting (in the advent of divorce). Statistic on lifestyle and happiness clearly show the need for fathers in kids lives. Feminized men are tainted masculinity and expressions of toxic female chauvinism. I have always told my girls that I have to approve of their boyfriends. …. not one of them asked me what type of guy I would not like for them. I wasn’t sure myself until I read TRM but now I know.

rugby11
rugby11
6 years ago

“When a boy’s real, masculine, inborn nature expresses itself the first thing it meets in this equalist-but-feminine-primary education is derision and shame. For as much as boys would be boys they are taught that they aren’t good for being so. They’re encouraged to self-repress, self-deprecate their gender and self-police their brothers.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJN9wvR6FKg What defines her feelings defines her reality… “Women evolved to see men as a Jack of all trades, master of some.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAt5JB96Cdk Improvise in the moment you are now alive in… “He never learned the masculine inspired discipline, determination and resiliency because all that conflicts with the lie… Read more »

JT McMahon
JT McMahon
6 years ago

Were it not for an (as yet) uncensored internet and a luminary who can first even see the dots – let alone connect them – it would be Game Over.

TheMarquis
TheMarquis
6 years ago

Rollo I don’t often post here and when I do it’s in Field Reports about my marriage, but I really thought this was illuminating. It helped me think about my relationship with my son and the world “vulnerability”. I think of course men can have emotions and respond to them. It’s a caricature to say we don’t have them or we’re taught not to. We can have emotions and we SHOULD have them. It’s part of being human. The important thing is that we are not ruled by them and it is not “emotions first, then rationalise”. It is (or… Read more »

ANDREW HALPERN, D.O.
ANDREW HALPERN, D.O.
6 years ago

Rollo, while we will not agree on everything, the best way I know how to ‘thank’ you and support your efforts is to continue to point men toward TRM. The irrationality…the Cluster B features, if you will, present with so many relationships including Employers/in Business is remarkable. My next step is to find a way to…enlighten patients. Having faced the…challenges inherent with having mostly female or beta-male supervisors or CEOs and while working in a female-dominated industry (I’m a Physician/Child Psychiatrist in the Behavioral/Mental Health SYSTEM) – I have to be careful with whom I speak and what I say.… Read more »

AustralianIrishman
AustralianIrishman
6 years ago

Apologies if this has been covered before, but here are some of my thoughts on these issues. I wonder whether the origin of this “vulnerability as strength” meme comes (at least in women) from the same psychological place as the shit test. One way to frame this could be as a covert way to weed out the (archetypal) alpha vs beta mindset in males. Any male who acquiesced to the request for vulnerability and said something akin to “thank you, I am so glad I finally get to show my sensitive side” has basically shown his lack of the “true”… Read more »

Doggy Dude
Doggy Dude
6 years ago

This is a universal. Everywhere in the world the same thing is happening. The same story is playing out with adolescent boys (and never grown-up adolescent boys) in every country, the unhinged, rage-filled blow-up. And yet only in America, it seems, do they act out with guns.

Is it a coincidence, then, that only in America do they have ACCESS to guns?

Sri
Sri
6 years ago

Women’s worldview at work — same old stuff. Having been in and now out of a relationship that failed due to my blue pilled conditioning and my stupidity (and also her own issues), I came to the red pill. Only wished i had found it 10 years earlier Now I am developing my own frame simply seeing what’s right in front of me and all of a sudden, everything’s clear as crystal. The so called “intellect” has created enormous confusion where common sense and experience found none. Since then I have simply sworn off social media – facebook, twitter, quora,… Read more »

Sri
Sri
6 years ago

@AustralianIrishman Wonder whether the origin of this “vulnerability as strength” meme comes (at least in women) from the same psychological place as the shit test. One way to frame this could be as a covert way to weed out the (archetypal) alpha vs beta mindset in males. Any male who acquiesced to the request for vulnerability and said something akin to “thank you, I am so glad I finally get to show my sensitive side” has basically shown his lack of the “true” alpha mindset. I guess this would come under “beta bait” in heartiste’s language. It’s not that complicated.… Read more »

TheMarquis
TheMarquis
6 years ago

kfg You remembered that? I think it was one of my earliest posts. More than a year ago. Yes, she found a decade old cache of “Pick Up” materials in some backup folder of the computer. Long predated our relationship and she had seen my paperback copy of The Game years before so it wasn’t that big a deal. But she made some comments about how that kind of stuff was rapey and misogynist and she wasn’t comfortable with me reading it and I kind of laughed it off. She used to bring it up as a Fitness Test sometimes… Read more »

Sri
Sri
6 years ago

@TheMarquis ….She used to bring it up as a Fitness Test sometimes for months after that, like if I moved in for a kiss or made a joke she would say “did you read it in one of those books?”…. The whole idea of masculinity as something that can be cultivated has the same effect on women as seeing a magician discuss and rehearse his tricks backstage. It is detestable to them. In a way the organic beauty of the trick is lost in the analysis and practice moves. The audience does not have to hear the musician make all… Read more »

Randy Burger
Randy Burger
6 years ago

Great post but it misses something. Women want men to be toxic at some level and they foster it. There’s a story about some anthropologists visiting a tribe, seeing male aggression, and documenting it as unprovoked. It took them a while to see that women in the tribe were provoking it by playing “let’s you and him fight” with the tribesmen.

Male stoicism comes from two things: High T (which inhibits feelings) and having to deal with women’s emotional rollercoasters.

boulderhead
6 years ago
Sentient
Sentient
6 years ago

Halp

“I have to be careful with whom I speak and what I say”

You appear to be doxxing yourself???

Sentient
Sentient
6 years ago

Marquis

“Basically I think I need to keep working at it. Keep lifting, hopefully build some dread if she sees other girls’ reactions around me (we don’t go out much, she doesn’t have much opportunity to see it). Keep fighting the frame battles.”

You got it. Dread… Dread and more dread. This is going to be the tipping point in the two steps forward one back trench war. Dread and the moment you are indifferent to her outburst over it.

walawala
walawala
6 years ago

This is where a critical understanding of ev psych is critical.

Biology doesn’t like. Women may want men to open up etc etc etc….

There’s a movement now for women to swoon over a sensitive guy….

But where i live that guy is not Homer Simpson, he’s usually some quiet, manly looking strong silent type… Think the David Beckham archetype— sporty, (former) trophy wife, kids–he checks off all 3 triggers of male to female attraction.

Suddenly he opens his mouth and starts babbling about how much he misses her—he’s done.

newlyaloof
6 years ago

@bolderhead, who was abusive, your mom or dad? I’m guessing your mom. Did you ever confront her about her behavior? I’ve seen a few stories in the past where kids eventually catch their parent’s hand in the act of hitting them and tell them no f#cking more.

Major Styles
6 years ago

Note how at the bottom of every Word Press article that relates to the Red Pill, we get feminist recommendations in the “More on WordPress” section.

It’s like the creators of Word Press don’t want you to link to other red-pilled writers. You’re supposed to find them on your own through a lengthy analysis in the search engine.

boulderhead
6 years ago

Newly, I can’t remember why she was swinging on me the last time she did. It is clear as a picture she swung ,i caught it in mid swing (this had become an instinctive reaction from street fighting ) looked her in the eye and she could sense my self restraint, that was the last time for physical abuse from that moment on it was only mental.

newlyaloof
6 years ago

@boulderhead, I see.

My family didn’t abuse me, but after learning of the red pill, I realized I had to drastically cut the amount of time I spend around family, friends, co-workers who no longer complemented my new self. I still like them, but I don’t need them any longer.

JT McMahon
JT McMahon
6 years ago

Here’s an experiment (caveat – these observations US coastal metropolitan university, i.e. the Whole Foods R uS crowd): Next time at a neutral public space (e.g. market) consciously perceive the (unconcious) postures of people. With rare exception, will tend to find: Mid-aged women broadcast vague annoyance, unhappiness. Mid-aged men broadcast defeat, being subdued, cowed, making themselves small – particularly when accompanying a woman – and she leads. These seem in Neo’s state: something is wrong, they feel it – but don’t know what. Teen girls (when in gaggles) exude exuberant confident ownership – the freedom to judge. Teen boys (often… Read more »

JT McMahon
JT McMahon
6 years ago

“Note how at the bottom of every Word Press article that relates to the Red Pill, we get feminist recommendations in the “More on WordPress” section.”

Interesting observation, Major.

boulderhead
6 years ago

@Newly

I believe that some need to divorce their families of origin in order to maintain a healthy sense of self. I will still allow for visitation of them but boundaries are set and when they cross them it is time to go.

KABA
KABA
6 years ago

It’s when normal boys being boys is suppressed and repressed that they never learn to deal with it properly and act out. In public school, any interaction with a hint of conflict becomes an official discipline issue with the administration. Boys don’t learn to fight then deescalate and becomes friends again, because adults are stopping the learning process and imposing severe discipline. Because the boys didn’t act like girls. Again boys are treated like dysfunctional girls. When girls have a outright fight with each other it’s nuclear and high stakes. The losing girl can be ejected from her peer group… Read more »

boulderhead
6 years ago

@ JT

“Teen boys (often in gaggles) display activities, behaviors, “up-talk” speech pattern (and quantity) identical to the girls, a subtle #2 deference, and seeming contentment. All is well. (Is this simply “cover” or camouflage over something male? How real is the presentation, how deep does it go?)”

The speech pattern sounds like baby talk with mispronunciation? I get the sense that it is pandering as they tend to lose the inflection when isolated with a masculine man.

Also it would appear like convenient learned survival behaviour to get along with no effort.

Sentient
Sentient
6 years ago

masculine emotion

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_pvyJZmbsI

Sentient
Sentient
6 years ago

comment image

Masculine emotion…

get your boys into team sports, preferably those with contact. Lot’s of opportunity to express the gamut of emotions.

SJB
SJB
6 years ago

@Rollo: to lay the foundation: I agree with your article’s push-back against feminists and their “allies.” You have taken on their definition of vulnerability which is short for emotional vulnerability — how the girl herd keeps the herd a herd: “If you don’t X I won’t be your friend anymore . . .” I disagree with you taking that up. Vulnerability is not a weakness. It is a fact. Your skin can be wounded by extreme heat or cold so you protect it with clothing; wearing clothing you can be wounded by a (very close range) 9MM projectile so you… Read more »

boulderhead
6 years ago

SJB go on , roll over and show your belly make yourself a target.

fleezer
fleezer
6 years ago

“It lies in reimagining how we educate boys and how we see masculinity as a net positive that can deter exactly this kind of emotional outburst.” like moving fight club out of the basement as it morphs into project mayhem there are many fight clubs all over the world. there always were. now we just know about each other. what do we call it when independent cells organically working to achieve the same long range objective converge? synchronicity critical mass approaching. lots of pent-up energy going to be released = possibility to harness and channel it into something new and… Read more »

rugby11
rugby11
6 years ago

“From a pragmatic point of view, I would suggest that a good way to explain the mechanics behind this to the uninitiated (whether they be sons, other men etc.) is this: Females get to display their vulnerability in an essentially unlimited way with no drain on their SMV (in many cases it may actually be a net positive). Males on the other hand have to EARN their expression of emotional vulnerability. Males and females alike are generally disgusted at the sight of a weak man crying or expressing strong emotions. But when we see a strong man break down it… Read more »

marelius
marelius
6 years ago

@Rollo “Men tend to prioritize information through a filter of rational discernment first and then sort out how they feel about that information in an emotional context.” I absolutely agree with this sentiment, but I think its really step 2 for us with regard to emotions. Feelings (or emotions) are spontaneous for all humans, and are deeply seated in our past experiences and personality. We really don’t control them at all, they just occur. The intentional exercise of control/frame management/MPO all occur in how we choose to react to those spontaneously occurring emotions. It is true that for most of… Read more »

M Simon
6 years ago

boulderhead
March 15, 2018 at 8:51 pm

The Maker movement is thriving. And it is often a few old men teaching boys about things. Not just making.

M Simon
6 years ago

marelius
March 16, 2018 at 10:01 am

Your point about emotions being useful signals is an important one. Feeling what she feels is a very good way to get an inside track on interactions. And the more nuanced your detection system the better. “Ah. She is mainly excited but a little disappointed. I need to shift a little until there is only excitement.”

M Simon
6 years ago

rugby11
March 16, 2018 at 9:03 am

JP leaves out of the 60s the whole computer revolution that was an outgrowth of the 60s culture.

He says “useful and honest” is something missing from the 60s. Well it emerged in the computer geeks of the 70s. And that was when the folks of the 60s turned 30. The usual age (these days) for that transition.

Just look at a picture from the late 70s of the Microsoft founders. Even Bill Gates was glassy eyed.

fleezer
fleezer
6 years ago

“I now know that my emotions are real, that they occur without my “consent” in a spontaneous manner, and that it is imperative for me to be aware of them, so that I can think carefully about them and chose the best course of action to ensure the optimal outcome for ME.” let’s accept for the moment the premise that emotions are real and also that they occur without the consent of the operator and then take the example of rejection by a girl a boy really wants to close his approach = action her rejection = response his emotion… Read more »

Mabui
Mabui
6 years ago

Don’t confuse privately acknowledging your mental state with publishing it. Predators find this knowledge useful. Reserve self knowledge for yourself.

marelius
marelius
6 years ago

@Mabui Exactly – no one needs to know what emotion you are sensing, nor what your are thinking about that emotion. I would never recommend to any male that they explain their thoughts or their emotions. That is where the FI concept of “mansplaining” arose from. Rather, I would explain that it is IMPERATIVE for them to understand how they are feeling and what they are thinking about it so that they can be fully informed BEFORE choosing the resulting action, which can be observed by everyone, and WILL be judged by them as well. Only in this manner can… Read more »

kfg
kfg
6 years ago

For the record – I am not magenta.

redpill in training
redpill in training
6 years ago

Yea… but let’s also ban the guns… just to be safe… since, you know, feminists are not going anywhere anytime soon

Besides, shootings don’t happen only at schools and shooting drills, bulletproof windows, arming teachers, and putting police men at schools are no solution.

boulderhead
6 years ago

Do you think taking away a gun is an easy action.

https://youtu.be/adnXzutxWcQ

EsXherCixWyen
EsXherCixWyen
6 years ago

First Facebook post top of the page reminds me something I wrote in my diary back in my early teenage years. When I was 15 , I use to masturbate a lot. I suffered from headache, dizziness and couldn’t concentrate on my study so well. So I wrote in my diary this paragraph to remind me the pain for jerking off too much before I try to rub my penis again. Please don’t do this. It harms. It shrinks your mental capability, leads you all the way to misery.[From my personal diary 20/05/2014] Well I tolerated this for may be… Read more »

boulderhead
6 years ago

1300 deaths daily, should we ban tobacco.

“Cigarette smoking is responsible for more than 480,000 deaths per year in the United States, including more than 41,000 deaths resulting from secondhand smoke exposure. This is about one in five deaths annually, or 1,300 deaths every day. On average, smokers die 10 years earlier than nonsmokers.”

kfg
kfg
6 years ago

Motor vehicles have been racking up a pretty good homicide score and even greater manslaughter score, not to mention the accident risk to children, so I won’t mention it.

fleezer
fleezer
6 years ago

manhood is an abstract – it is both the language and the document on which it’s written with all the old lies gone, what makes a man’s constitution going forward? mpo is your constitution – it should be rooted solidy in properly tested theory and be pretty fucking hard to change, but not impossible when shit gets crazy and you’re faced with massive new inputs/stimulus, simply refer to the document you wrote on your core and unless there is overwhelmingly compelling evidence to change, you don’t deviate 1. learn language of manhood – question everything but respect your elders 2.… Read more »

mersonia
6 years ago

It’s like the third time I fuck any female I’m ready to move on to the next and never want to see her again…….

EhIntellect
EhIntellect
6 years ago

Backyard pools vs. guns kill children 100:1.

LEX
LEX
6 years ago

Masculinity built civilization. Every time you take a shit and press a lever and your shit magically disappears and you don’t have to deal with it, every time you clean your ass on toilet paper that magically made it from the forest to your now sparkling clean butt, thank a MAN for these and the innumerable other benefits of civilization.
Women complain about masculinity from within the four walls of the world that men built for them. Let’s see how well you would really fare without us you incompetent, spoiled, entitled, overprivileged brats.

KABA
KABA
6 years ago

another example of society, media, gov, business etc selling us a wrong a harmful message:
http://reason.com/blog/2018/03/15/gary-taubes-on-how-big-government-made-u

especially relevant for guys trying to lose weight

theasdgamer
6 years ago

It took me a second read to see that dalrock was arguing about the absurdity of tradcon values.

Stingray
Stingray
6 years ago

The lie is more insidious than “masculinity is toxic”. The current narrative is that masculinity doesn’t even exist. That all boys are really just girls inside, but they’re pretending to be masculine because they’re petrified that other boys will make fun of them and call them gay. Therefore, any time a boy is physically active, aggressive, competitive, or has a sexual urge, he must have learned that from his terrible father or the media, because everybody knows that masculinity isn’t real and is just something cowardly guys pretend at to save face with other cowardly guys. Masculinity saves lives. You… Read more »

theasdgamer
6 years ago

I just finished watching the movie “Blood Money”. From a RP perspective, I could see all that the female villain was doing and laughed at the idiots who weren’t treating her intelligently. She should have been slapped and kicked by Cusack’s character when she was being mouthy and just to make sure she is submissive. Also, always sit with your back to the wall.

j
j
6 years ago

@mersonia

“It’s like the third time I fuck any female I’m ready to move on to the next and never want to see her again…….”

stop fucking fatties

mersonia
6 years ago

@Dr.Zipper

aaye can you link me to that tool you made to find peoples comments?

kfg
kfg
6 years ago

“She should have been slapped . . . ”

. . . and sent to her room until she was ready to behave herself.

How Gone the Wind should have ended, about 5 pages/minutes in.

rugby11
rugby11
6 years ago

” Let’s see how well you would really fare without us you incompetent, spoiled, entitled, overprivileged brats.”

Lost Patrol
Lost Patrol
6 years ago

The only toxic masculinity is the absence of masculinity.

That original tweeter, if that’s what that is, would have been greatly assisted in life by a good punch in the face. You can tell that he’s never had one.

kfg
kfg
6 years ago

Koepcke is an interesting case. Tough girl, but she was the child of two zoologists and had been taught some important emergency survival skills, by her father, which saved her life a few times along the way.

Not too many girls would know to pour gasoline on their maggot infested flesh.

M Simon
6 years ago

j
March 16, 2018 at 4:33 pm

LOL

M Simon
6 years ago

kfg
March 16, 2018 at 6:39 pm

Not too many girls know how to do anything. That is why there is always a “honey do” list.

But you can teach them – some. The LTR still doesn’t understand how a gas engine works. But she could change the oil if she had to. And gap the plugs.

rugby11
rugby11
6 years ago

So i’ve been looking into teaching rugby to get away from old habits and embrace responsibility. Apparently back in college a roommate who was soon to be a cop made a prank or assumed i did retail theft and trespassing… This is weird because no one ever told me about it since it happened untill i got a letter today. Which will be interesting to speak about and call him about… “dismissed without prejudice”

I am not sure how to describe how much i appreciate learning from everyone here…

Culum Struan
Culum Struan
6 years ago

To continue an older discussion from the Weinstein/MeToo discussions we were having – I find it interesting that Trump is the first person to actually go after Stormy Daniels in court for breach of her confidentiality agreement, even though a bunch of women breached confidentiality agreements with Weinstein for their payoffs (Rose McGowan springs to mind, but I don’t think she’s the only one – I think there may have been other men with NDAs too, who paid off accusers). The reason Weinstein’s not gone after McGowan et al is not because he has a bad case but because he… Read more »

I.H.
I.H.
6 years ago

@TheMarquis, It would be wise to keep your standard of living modest and to stash cash that no one knows about. If you can, encourage her to make more money. The constant frame battle is going to start to wear thin on you. You may eventually develop a ZFG attitude. And that could either greatly improve things or it might eventually lead to divorce. @JT McMahon, I’ve made similar observations. In particular, the middle aged dude being led around by his wife, slump shouldered and beat down looking. And the teenage girls acting on top of the world, loud and… Read more »

I.H.
I.H.
6 years ago

@TheMarquis,

And, if “traveling a lot” = overnight stays… don’t forget about the true nature of women…

Sentient
Sentient
6 years ago

Marquis

Pulled from Rollo’s twatter feed…

https://m.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=5&v=EGS8DHD2IDw

I don’t know who this guy is Rollo, i hope he does all the Iron Rules.

Sentient
Sentient
6 years ago

Ps the bit about Meghan Kelly is exactly what you are shooting for. Reflexive response.

kobayashii1681
6 years ago

“Because it sounds right. It sounds like it should be right.”

Women, in a nutshell.😁

kobayashii1681
6 years ago

“A kid like Nikolas Cruz was bound to happen in a world that teaches boys to prioritize feelings above rationality.”

F.A.C.T.

JT McMahon
JT McMahon
6 years ago

Rollo Tomassi March 17, 2018 at 7:46 am “This is exactly what I was referring to about the differences between how boys and girls are raised this week” Wonder if may be linked to the nature of the woman, peruse these curves and in any parameter the women are much tighter with less variability than men: https://www.google.com/search?q=women%27s+versus+men%27s+intelligence+curves&rlz=1C9BKJA_enUS745US745&hl=en-US&prmd=sivn&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi8rvr30fPZAhVP-mMKHcNSBQsQ_AUIEigC&biw=1024&bih=653#imgrc=qdnaZHJkGHMYqM: For some reason in woman evo-bio has produced relative conformity; no stretch to suspect evo-psych would produce less variability in thought. May well be in the female brain there is a selection bias for same-ness; intolerance of difference. In a female-predominant educational system… Read more »

Yollo Comanche
Yollo Comanche
6 years ago

@Sentient

He loses points for promoting biracial relationships. Everyone knows a cracker that can’t get a match in his own hue is a Sheen.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Np7m6_W7aVk

It’s just like the Asian Wife fantasy. It’s a buffer.

melmoth
melmoth
6 years ago

5 decades or more of K-12 as temples of girl worship.

Name a female invention.

Blaximus
Blaximus
6 years ago

… I wonder about you sometimes yollo.

TheMarquis
TheMarquis
6 years ago

@IH – thank you, that had occurred to me before. Yes, lots of overnight trips, anywhere from several days to a week or two. all over the country (but there are two cities she goes to 80% of the time) so plenty of opportunities to play away if that’s what’s happening. I have no specific reason to suspect anything is going on – only that she has plenty of opportunities. As far as I can tell, unless I have a reason to be actively suspicious, my game plan doesn’t change – the marriage has flaws but as of now I… Read more »

kfg
kfg
6 years ago

“Name a female invention.”

One that they actually like to brag about is packaging white paint in a quarter ounce bottle and selling it to secretaries for full quart prices.

Asking them who invented white paint makes their heads hurt, because they don’t know it’s white paint, even while they’re using it to paint something white.

And of course men have made it obsolete anyway.

Ajax Parallax
Ajax Parallax
6 years ago

@TheMarquis

Do you have any female admirers at work/outside of work who genuinely respect you? (Meaning your competencies, not nec. your attractiveness)

If not, build some post haste.

TheMarquis
TheMarquis
6 years ago

@Ajax Parallax – the odd one, yes, but not much, mainly because work is so male dominated. I mentioned in previous posts, but not recently that I’ve used Tinder and played away myself when on business trips, so I know women like me. I’ve also had a couple of the wife’s friends show a lot of interest in me, as well as other women from a non-work social circle, but the way our social lives work (both of us travelling, plus we both have separate social circles in addition to a joint one) the wife really doesn’t have much opportunity… Read more »

Ajax Parallax
Ajax Parallax
6 years ago

@TheMarquis “and the wife nearly created a scene at the end of the night after everyone left saying that woman had been flirting with me all evening and getting angry…” That’s a good type of angry. It’s when she feels comfortable hanging out with other men alone without bothering to wonder what you’re doing with whom that you need to poke her with some dread. My woman inviting her “dear male friend” to her hotel room for a ‘meeting’ is a dealbreaker according to my Boundary Violation Monitor. Yours may be set at higher tolerances. My (deadpan non-butthurt) response: “Was… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
6 years ago

Marquis…. Sorry man all the stuff about your wife working are yellow flags at a minimum. Don’t be fooled by female “honesty”… They tell you stuff based on hindbrain impulses but in cat language. Not their fault if you don’t know catonese… But after the fallout when the dust is clearing she can say with honesty she mentioned so and so etc. Remember this is all hindbrain chatter to her too. So her forebrain probably believes it. For now. Until you know it just happens. You are playing with fire if she is attractive. That 10 to 20% income ain’t… Read more »

rugby11
rugby11
6 years ago

Marquis
And stop explaining. Demonstrate. Rollo has to explain because we need to digest. You just take what you need and implement. All the guys just keep explaining feel like its a nerdy environment.

Ajax Parallax
Ajax Parallax
6 years ago

@TheMarquis Meant to add, as Sentient referenced, a woman will usually leak out bits of premeditated overt *honesty* as a subtle shit-test. Often, they aren’t even aware of exactly why they are doing it (but, believe me, their female mate optimization firmware knows). If she actually used the word *awkward*, then, dammit, this honest girl knew she was about to engage in disrespectful behavior (and went ahead with it anyway). Hypergamy is like an opportunistic dog. If you don’t quick-snap the leash on it’s neck when it sees an opportunity, it will test and test your tolerance boundary until it… Read more »

rugby11
rugby11
6 years ago

Marquis Watch Fight Club. Quit exercise. Spend free times with Bike Racers Club or some people whose profession is dangerous. Do what you want. Having some time off your LTR was the best, but thats your wife. I have recently joined a Karate Club (We have no Bike Racers Club or similar), Be practical . This place is purely theoretical. I come here to do some mischief. That doesn’t mean I don’t know Red Pill. I come here to shake off the nerds. Guys, third world war would be purely Red Pill Masculine males Vs Blue Pill Feminine World. No… Read more »

Sentient
Sentient
6 years ago

Rollo

Who is this magenta joker user other’s screen names?

kfg
kfg
6 years ago

The magenta icon matches Jack’s Wasted Life.

Lost Patrol
Lost Patrol
6 years ago

white paint in a quarter ounce bottle

This is some of the great sidebar info you can get here to use in your personal quest to annoy feminists whenever opportunity presents.

@Marquis

Some of the married veterans here, men whose Kung Fu is strong, are reading your comments like this:

http://memecrunch.com/meme/BHRUJ/danger-will-robinson-danger/image.jpg

Not that you can’t deal with the situation, just stay aware that traveling business wife can get out of hand fast.

I.H.
I.H.
6 years ago

@TheMarquis,

Dude, I hate to tell you, but 98% chance she’s already banged one of those dudes. As Ajax said, she’s leaking out parts of the truth. I would bet money that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

She’s waving a huge red flag right in front of your face.

rugby11
rugby11
6 years ago

Apparently i have an imposter who was been using my handle…

SJF
SJF
6 years ago

I’m going to throw something out of left field that I rarely see mentioned in red pill spheres and that I know to be valuable because of reference experiences I’ve had:

@TheMarquis

Do you have any male buddies at work/outside of work who genuinely respect you? (Meaning your competencies, not nec. your attractiveness)

If not, build some post haste.

And talk to them in a purpose-driven manner.

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