As most of my readers know I’m presently editing the final draft of my third book. A very large part, almost a third, of this new book will be dedicated to Red Pill Parenting. I’ve written several series-posts about parenting from a Red Pill perspective and I felt it was an important enough topic to deserve a category itself in my sidebar links. I’ve expanded significantly upon these essays in the book as well as adding more material and some general advice for Red Pill aware men in their parenting efforts.
One thing I’m asked of from men who are Red Pill aware fathers is what to look out for and what to apply themselves to in raising a son or daughter using a Red Pill Lens. While prospectively it will give women some parenting insights, I’ve written this section with the intent of informing men about what they can expect from a feminine-primary social bent on conditioning a man’s children to assimilate to a Blue Pill mindset.
Without giving too much away, I’ve tried to express the dangers of a system of feminine-primary acculturation that contributes to what we term ‘Blue Pill Conditioning’ in the manosphere. What defines a ‘Blue Pill‘ mindset means different things to different men, but what conditions him to literally think, and invest his ego into that feminine-primary identification is initiated at a very early age. One thing I think gets lost on guys becoming Red Pill aware is just how much of his very natural-feeling sense of self is the result of a conditioning that’s taken the better part of his lifetime to develop in him.
The main reason I began developing a Red Pill parenting dialog is because it’s vitally necessary for Red Pill fathers – really any father with a sense of conventional masculinity – to come to terms with how his sons’ and daughters’ upbringing will be defined by what I call ‘The Village’ in the book. I coined this from the popular meme that “it takes a village to raise a child”, and the Village we have today is one that is dead set on instilling and normalizing a state of deliberate gender confusion – and hopefully perpetuate that state into a person’s adulthood.
The Village
This Village is a catch-all term and I mean to have it represent all of the influences a child receives in its upbringing that contributes to its Blue Pill sense of self. This includes the influences of media, popular entertainment, academia, their pre and grammar school education, popular culture that actively seeks to instill its own ideological base, etc. These are fairly recognizable sources of the Village’s systemic influence, but it’s also important to understand that this influence will be reinforced by your child’s peers, their Village family and relatives.
‘The Village’ will raise your kids if you don’t. You will be resisted, you will be ridiculed, you will be accused of every thought-crime to the point of being dragged away to jail for imparting Red Pill awareness to them (in the future I expect it to be equated with child abuse). The Village will teach your boys from the most impressionable ages (5 years old) to loath their maleness, to feel shame for being less perfect than girls and to want to remake their gender-identity more like girls – to the point that transitioning their gender to girls’ will be the norm.
The Village will raise your daughters to perpetuate the same cycle that devalues conventional masculinity, the same cycle that considers a father’s presence as superfluous and their sacrifices as granted expectations. It will raise your daughters to over-inflate their sense of worth with unmerited confidence at the expense of boys as their foils. It will teach them to openly embrace Hypergamy as their highest personal authority (publicly and privately) and to disrespect anything resembling masculinity to be less than some silly anachronism or reverse it into being all about men’s insecurities.
The good news is that for all of these efforts in social engineering, the Feminine Imperative is still confounded by basic biology and the psychological firmware evolved into us over millennia. That basic root reality is your greatest advantage as a father. If there’s one underlying truth upon which to base your parenting it’s this; children are still motivated by evolved influences that are relatively predictable. Begin from the root truth that we evolved our psychology and our behaviors from intergender complementarity that made us the preeminent species on this planet. It takes a global Village to distort this by teaching failed notions of egalitarian equalism.
Useful Tools – Blue Pill Fathers
Although the Village would assert its influence to be the primary one in your child’s life, and although it would have women believe that father’s are both necessary when convenient and superfluous, father’s are not without their uses. The Feminine Imperative (by way of the social system of the Village) needs fathers to help reinforce its feminine-primary influence in their children’s lives. Thus, Blue Pill fathers must also carry the feminine-primary water in their parenting. They must be taught to believe that parenting a daughter is preferable to parenting a son:
I realize that everything I could do with a boy I can do with my daughters (i.e. play basketball, teach them how to throw a punch, and play in the dirt). Yes, I know that’s a big fat “duh” for many of you, but I’m a recovering knucklehead with minimal relapses, so please humor me. And yes, I’m going to teach them much more than those three things – but I promise you that I will teach them those three things.
The Feminine Imperative needs men to constantly reaffirm the fallacies of egalitarian equalism, but it is The Village that needs a father to instill them into the minds of their own flesh and blood as well as those of other fathers. The meme is always a pretense of gender-neutral equity, but the latent purpose is one of devaluing the very existence of boys, and, by extension, conventional masculinity.
And this is the crux of the effort to enlist fathers in the system of the Village; masculinity and maleness are always portrayed as problems to be solved – the solution always being more feminine identification. The main goal of the Village is to destroy and redefine conventional masculinity in a way that only benefits the feminine.
I realize that being “girly” is just a myth. What does that mean, anyway? Would my kid be less girly if she dressed up as Spider-Man for Halloween instead of a princess? (and that’s exactly what she did, by the way). Would she be less girly if she wanted to tackle little boys on the football field instead of taking ballet classes? Not to me.
This is precisely the degree of gender obfuscation the Village requires fathers to endorse. The squid ink here is the idea that masculine and feminine, boys & girls, male and female are all one, undifferentiated whole; in fact the old ideas of gender differences that brought the human race to where it is today, we are taught, were nothing more than “myths”. The underlying note is that girls are the functional equals of boys, but girls have the social and sexual advantage of being female.
The social narrative of the Village, the one it needs fathers to internalize and parrot back, is one of Fempowerment, but simultaneously one of male disempowerment. The idea then evolves into a sense of conventional masculinity being a defect of men; men are just unperfected women who are in need of women (or their daughters’) innate correction.
The idea here is that men with daughters make for “better men” as defined by the Feminine Imperative and approved by The Village. What Red Pill fathers need to acknowledge in this that their sons will be taught that their maleness is inherently flawed. All of the attributes and evolved instincts that make him a boy will be connected with his masculinity being “toxic”.
“Toxic Masculinity” or “Hyper-masculinity” are common tropes in the Village. We’ve gotten to a point that any form of traditional, conventionally masculine behaviors are now equated with a character flaw in men. So thoroughly has the Village distorted the old books definition of manhood that anything resembling a characteristically masculine behavior is, by default, an act of ‘hyper’ or “over-the-top” masculinity. This, of course, makes characterizing those acts as toxic, or ridiculous.
The Preferred Gender
In my essay, Environmental Stresses I added this quote from the book The Red Queen:
Contrary to popular belief a preference for boys over girls is not universal. Indeed, there is a close relationship between social status and the degree to which sons are preferred. Laura Betzig of the University of Michigan noticed that, in feudal times, lords favored their sons, but peasants were more likely to leave possessions to daughters. While their feudal superiors killed or neglected daughters or banished them to convents, peasants left them more possessions: Sexism was more a feature of elites than of the unchronicled masses.
[…]Lower down the social scale, daughters are preferred even today: A poor son is often forced to remain single, but a poor daughter can marry a rich man. In modern Kenya, Mukogodo people are more likely to take daughters than sons to clinics for treatment when they are sick, and therefore more daughters than sons survive to the age of four. This is rational of the Mukogodo parents because their daughters can marry into the harems of rich Samburu and Maasai men and thrive, whereas their sons inherit Mukogodo poverty. In the calculus of Trivers-Willard, daughters are better grandchildren-production devices than sons.
These quotes are a part of a much more in depth look at how both environmental and social stresses contribute to a ‘preferred gender’ dynamic in both animal populations and human social structure. As I was reviewing this book recently it hit me how western cultures have blatantly been endorsing ‘female’ as the preferred gender for the past 60-70 years now.
I realize this assertion grates on popular culture’s sensibilities when it comes to gender, but as I stated in that essay, at no other time in human history has it been more advantageous to be female than today. Whether you want to argue that assertion from socioeconomic, education, gender identity, social ‘progress’ or any other metric, women in this era enjoy a condition that places their sex as the primary one in terms of social advantage. Women today live in a social condition that advantages, ensures their relative successes and directly or indirectly provisions for their personal security while simultaneously seeking to handicap being male and ridiculing the conventionally masculine.
In many a prior essay I’ve made the assertion that this effort in feminizing boys – in “perfecting” them with feminization – has been a long effort in social engineering. And while I still believe this is true, I think that in recent years the adaptive response to this preferred gender dynamic for Blue Pill fathers, men and boys is now an effort in socially engineering boys to imagine their gender identity as being transitionable to that of girls. Needles to say this push for gender self-reassignment has been embraced by the Village.
Olivia loves Disney’s Frozen princesses, all things sparkly, bright tights and ballet. During her family’s Cuban vacation last summer, she danced in the children’s “mini-disco” before the evening shows, twirling and leaping across the stage. One night another guest turned to her parents, exclaiming, “Your daughter is the girliest girl I’ve ever seen!”
Olivia was born a boy.
She “socially transitioned” from male to female, in nursery school last year. She was four years old.
Today, she attends kindergarten at a Montreal primary school. Only her teachers and the school board know she is transgender, for now.
Olivia (not her real name to protect her identity) is part of a growing phenomenon that is being celebrated but which is also raising strong emotions: an increasing number of children as young as preschoolers appearing at gender identity-clinics across the country, convinced they are of the opposite sex.
The new push to normalize transgender acceptance relies solely on the presumption that gender identity is a social construct rather than influenced by biological, and evolved psychological dynamics inherent in both sexes. The idea again comes back to the egalitarian presumption of a blank-slate equalism and a rejection of gender as a binary determination. Yet in over 90% of transgender identity shifts we see it is boys who opt to “become” female in their self-reassignment. Left to their own non-abstract decision making – and reinforced by Blue Pill parents and the Village – boys will, in the binary, shift to a female / feminine gender identity in overwhelmingly greater numbers than girls shifting to a male / masculine identity.
I would argue that this greater transgender preference for boys is a direct result of the Preferred Gender dynamic and reinforced by the Village conditioning boys for it while normalizing the idea of it in a larger cultural respect. This is the next step in cultural feminization of boys and men that began in the touchy-feely days of men needing to “get in touch with their feminine sides.”
It is no longer enough for boys just to be educated in a feminine-correct manner. It is no longer enough to teach them to despise the gender they were born into, “hoping their penises will fall off”, and it’s no longer enough to condition them to defer to girl’s perfectness. Boys must literally be transitioned to be girls from as young an age as 4 years old.
This is the degree to which the Village and the Feminine Imperative will go to condition future men into a Blue Pill mindset. I outline this in the upcoming book, but this is vitally important for Red Pill fathers to understand because these will be the ‘boys’ they may eventually need to mentor and unplug from their very early psychological damage. Many voices in the manosphere call this damage child abuse and it’s easy to understand why; this damage works on a boy’s most intimate part of his sense of self.
Red Pill fathers need to recognize this perversion of conventional masculinity for what it is and protect their sons (as well as daughters) from it while still anticipating the fall that will result from the “men” this re-engineering of gender will create.
Hi @Rolli,
ETA on the new book?
Any chance you’ll put one together with Dalrock?
One question that comes to mind is. Red Pill fathers are going to raise the most stable, emotionally intelligent and *valuable* women in the Sexual Marketplace. Thes women are going to be fawned over and courted by Red Pill men desperate to find a worthy woman. Much like women of high beauty (9s & 10s) get courted by men who mistake that for what they really want. Keeping one’s Red Pill Daughters grounded, keeping them from getting swollen heads (much like 10s do) and teaching them how to identify the right men in the Sexual Marketplace may prove to be… Read more »
I remember you saying something like,
” the ancients portrayed the devil not as a man with hooves but as an androgynous being”
That androgynous “spirit” has dispersed throughout our culture and is the spirit of our time.
How much power does a father have in this matriarchy?
It’s the answer to that question upon which masculine parenting stands or falls. Human social mores are like currents of water ; looks easy to resist until you’re waist deep in it.
Normalizing the idea of transgender 4y.o.s is the key to normalizing pedophilia
Bingo
I work on an adolescent psychiatric unit. The number of transgendered male-to-female patients has increased dramatically over the past several years. The majority aren’t what I would term “organic” cases, but rather the result of Axis II pathology exacerbated or caused by the perversity of our current cultural climate.
Frightening, frightening times.
#Pizzagate
Take a look at what’s on the bracelet
http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/290418-biden-shares-photo-of-friendship-bracelet-for-best-friend
On some level, I know this is ‘totally wrong’ to feel this way, but I’ll put it out there anyway:
-I would love to have a child, but only a son.
-If the woman I got pregnant was carrying a daughter, I’d want her to have an abortion.
I know that reflects horribly on me. I hope I don’t feel that way forever. I don’t like that I feel that way. But there it is.
@Joe K, I know that I am replying to an old thread/blog/post. I can understand that you would be looking to have a son. Hell I have two girls no boys. With that said would I like a son.. HELL YES but My wife is past the age of of 45 and having a healthy son, not genetically retarted by Autism or Downsyndrome, is dramatically reduced. So at this point in time I am in a marriage that has blue dye almost covering most aspects of it. As such I have two daughters that are 12 and 18, Which are,… Read more »
….whoa
@ Joe K
You can feel however you want to. No sweat.
Besides, this is what you think in the moment. It does not account what you’d actually feel when the time were to come.
Just trust this.
Nah Joe… You are just still choking on the Red Pill…
I have 4 daughters and a son. The son is special no doubt… But the girls, they just love their daddy…
Red Pill girls come from red pill dads… Hold them accountable… Tease them… Make them work for your approval… Game them. They will respond to you.
One of mine texted me the other day she could not live with the thought she dissapointed me.
Chillax and take a more mature look at the situation.
@joe
http://i2.wp.com/nyoobserver.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/hotdog804.png?quality=80&strip&ssl=1
Whoa is right. I didn’t dare click on the video heading the essay, as I am feeling good after a long weekend with peak masculine experiences. Great essay Rollo. “Toxic Masculinity” or “Hyper-masculinity” are common tropes in the Village. We’ve gotten to a point that any form of traditional, conventionally masculine behaviors are now equated with a character flaw in men. So thoroughly has the Village distorted the old books definition of manhood that anything resembling a characteristically masculine behavior is, by default, an act of ‘hyper’ or “over-the-top” masculinity. This, of course, makes characterizing those acts as toxic, or… Read more »
This guy, Jordan Peterson, is fighting the battle against transgender and free speech in Canada.
https://youtu.be/JDvj6DQd93o
You bet Cuck-anada will be at the front and centre of letting boys “figure out “they are females at a young age.
I see more and more of gender- neutrality in Canada.
In universities, they have signs saying “All- Gender ” bathrooms.
They also post signs in Male and Female saying anyone that identifies with that sex, can use the bathroom.
Having raised (yeah reared for ya effete types) both boys and girls I can tell you there IS a difference that appears to be genetic. It’s amusing to see my female friends who usually come from all daughter families act shocked at how boys behave even as young as 3 or 4. There is this social pressure to reign in a rambunctious aggressive boy. It’s funny to see my boys on the playground and have some hipster goatee girlyman confront me about how my boys are treating his pudgy son. I simply tell them to stop and sure enough the… Read more »
Author says that masculinity is shamed – it got me thinking how it is done?
I have taken a notice how mothers usually try to control overly active behavior from young boys. Once I was working out at the outdoor gym. There was a boy climbing over the training machine. His mother threatened him by saying he will get a beating from me for misbehaving hehe..
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1NEn
Rollo
autoplay=1
There is no doubt that this is happening on a wider scale than anyone who is not currently raising kids in this culture understands. In my own case, what I have done for my son in this context is competitive team sports (football as well) and wilderness summer camps where he basically goes (now leads) canoe trips in the Canadian wilderness from 3 to 20 days in length. One summer he went all the way up to Hudson Bay — that was one long trip. What you are looking for are contexts where your son is removed from the prevailing… Read more »
Mastery personal frame
“a boy who is feminized can never do the same thing, in the eyes of both men and women alike.”
It’s in part why culture controls the diealogue of trauma.
“Actual lesbianism, where a woman only finds women attractive is much more rare than male homosexuality.”
I grew up with nothing but bisexual women around me.
There is a lot packed into this article and I cannot possibly do it justice in the short time I have this morning. But it’s a crucially important conversation, and I wanted to add a few thoughts/insights to richen the dialog. I will come back tomorrow night and catch up and expand if warranted. – Almost all the 90% of boys who transition are homosexual as well. – Actual genetic transgenderism type of issues do occur. Looks like about 1 in 4400 live births. – Sexual orientation has a lot to do with this. One of the best theories out… Read more »
Whatever happened to Mitch? I was really looking forward to having my entire worldview upended just by continuing to read what he writes . . . Maybe he ascended? @Team PUA Mini-FR: Because of my schedule, I’m following the Yareally-approved “game whenever you can” method. During the week, that means walking home from work and approaching everyone who looks interesting. Girls standing and looking at their phone are super easy now, even if they are wearing headphones. I’m stuck on two scenarios: 1) girls on bikes; and 2) girls walking towards me when I’m headed the other direction. In both… Read more »
@Zhu Wunang “2) girls walking towards me when I’m headed the other direction.” “I did Yad stops for a week here in Local and those were universally rejected–it’s just way too confrontational for this culture.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTazZ9gTr_g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aaI3Srkd9tY The jist of those videos is walk with her until you can display enough value to get her to stop. I would go indirect, play up needing help like asking for directions, to avoid the confrontational stuff, and as they’re explaining start dropping in teases about their answers (“you’re sending me down that dark alleyway?? I’ll need you to be my bodyguard” etc),… Read more »
@ scribblerg I also wondered if boys wanting to “transition” had anything to do with low levels of testosterone? Doctors would probably be ostracised for even suggesting a link never mind trying to”fix” the problem with simple testosterone injections. Far more SJW and feminine identification points are to be gained by facilitating the transition of low T male to female using estrogen therapy because testosterone = bad, estrogen = good. Looks like Islam really will take over the west the way we are headed, the strong will always conquer the weak, that’s just basic biology. We really are headed for… Read more »
Happy red pill son. Walking through the grocery store the other day, some mommy type scowling at my 12 year old son then at me. The reason being whenever he is not in school, he wants to wear his 6″ bone handle knife in his holster. Day, night, whatever, he wants his knife with him, “just in case”. I just laughed at her. Ten seconds later I get pulled over by a slightly grizzly looking old guy. “Is that your son?” “Sure is” “Excellent, it’s good to see a boy with a knife, fucking kids are all pansies these days,… Read more »
A joke was made on RvF back in January 2015 about future thread titles in the year 2114.
One of them was, “Poll: Do You Guys Prefer Girth or Length on Your Wife’s Penis?”
That thread may come sooner than expected.
@Agent P, that’s excellent. With my son, I always give him extra treats at snack time. I’ll say, “Okay, son, you only get two cookies,” as I hand him three and give him the shush signal. He knows it’s something between us dudes that we keep from his mother and sister. I also tell him that the less television he watches the better because the television makes boys and men to look like idiots. When he watches, I point out all the instances where it happens. I also get him to hit the punching bag so that at least once… Read more »
@scrib
I got pronoun corrected about a month ago.
Me did too.
A new study of twins provides the strongest evidence yet that homosexuality has a genetic basis, researchers say, … We found 52 percent of identical twin brothers of gay men also were gay, compared with 22 percent of fraternal twins.” http://www.nytimes.com/1991/12/17/science/gay-men-in-twin-study.html The MOST you could say is that genetics MAY have SOME impact on sexual choice, not that there is a genetic basis. If this is the strongest evidence for a genetic basis, we have to conclude that the evidence doesn’t show that there is a genetic basis. Now if something like 95% of identical twin brothers were both gay,… Read more »
My pronoun is “My Lord and Master” spoken with a curtsey.
My short pronoun is simply sir
long one is Lord Business.
Anecdote du jour on gender bending and culture. So a while ago I was spending some time on the campus of a major national university in Toronto. Now Toronto is already incredibly gay, biggest population of gays outside of SF in the world. Whatever, I don’t have any beef with gay guys, gals whatever. Suffice to say there is a very alive and well gay culture in Toronto. Anyhow, touring said campus for work and spent some time at the student center. Sweet Jesus if it wasn’t the most effemenite panty waist collection of dolts ever. I am sure I… Read more »
“We really are headed for societal and economic collapse, and when it happens you won’t believe how fast the current crop of progressive liberal women will suddenly find “toxic masculinity” to be the most attractive thing in the world.”
And they’ll be happy. Because they’ll have something real to complain about.
Manufactured faux-rage must get tiresome.
Our boys all got swiss army knives at age five. To me this is a little early, but no mishaps (knock on wood). They each got a “starter” rifle (a .22) at about twelve. Jack Donovan’s ‘Way of Men’ is key.
pre-adolesent boys have very low testosterone levels naturally
One thing you can do for boys is put them in relatively small high schools. Boys like to be excellent and there are more slots per school-size available to be a jock or a brain or whatever in a small school.
@sfer
“One thing you can do for boys is put them in relatively small high schools.”
Works for girls too. Less peer-pressure in a classroom with 6 students
girls like be “normal”. And now normal is doing well in school, social media, etc.
Newlyaloof / Agent P
Give them a book…
Let’s drop a bit of science here and separate true body dysmorphia from fashion statements. Depending on where you are and what study you cite, gay folks make up about 5 to 8% of everyone. Truly dysmorphic trans people, or transsexuals as they were called, who really seem to be in the wrong body, is more like 1/100 of that. OK that still rounds out to 300,000 people, but out of a nation of 330 million. What biological or other factors makes this or that person gay is still unsettled, and there is some fluidity between straightness and gayness recognized… Read more »
Prof Mike Bailey’s book, which scrib cites above, is interesting in that it describes two kinds of male-to-female trans: the first he calls “homosexual transsexuals”, which is pretty much what scrib is describing above, while the second he calls “autogynephilic transsexuals”. A key difference is when it onsets — the first kind onsets usually prior to puberty in young children, and it’s quite uncommon. The second kind, which appears to be more common, onsets *after* puberty, and sometimes as late as the late teens or 20s, and is first and foremost directly about sexuality in that these people are attracted… Read more »
“I also wondered if boys wanting to “transition” had anything to do with low levels of testosterone?” Nope, social capital. Remember how much adulation caitlyn jenner received for transforming into something rather than actually accomplishing something. Why else men would voluntarily becomes eunuchs within the walls of Forbidden City but for the power and social capital associated with that act ? “Looks like Islam really will take over the west the way we are headed, the strong will always conquer the weak, that’s just basic biology.” Putin in Russia, Abe in Japan, Tories and Brexit in Uk, upcoming Le Pen… Read more »
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbUD7FRStbY
This is like my house everyday… push your sons to learn to attack and defend… look forward to the day he can take you… (as if…)
@Sentient, saw that book reference a few posts back. I’ll order it.
Newly… you will get a kick out of it too!
Also cosign team sports (as well as individual like swimming)… especially Lax and hockey… Both are physical yet not as physics dependent as football… more room for varying body types. and the kids are uniformly smart asses and highly social…
http://cdn1.sbnation.com/assets/3447333/cheapshot_medium.gif
@Sentient
Book ordered from Library, thanks.
(One thing the City actually does well around here is run a library system, I can log on, order a book or movie and it’ll show up at the local branch in a few days with no charge).
Will let you know what the boy has to say about it when he’s done.
Thanks again to all here. As the major hull-holes are now patched, I’m back on deck trimming sails: The boys and I were gone for three days, no cell service, getting back, wife and I have mini-date. She tells me that this masculinity thing is turning the boys against her (I don’t talk to her about it, she just hears the boys and me talking about it, but not in masculinity terms, things are-a-changin’). The boys don’t listen to her (her hoary shit tests aren’t working on them anymore , they have other things on their minds, like working at… Read more »
Novaseeker Being able to play ball and enjoy life has been a huge part of what can hurt a culture with males. http://www.joericketts.com/about.html “What we’re seeing now is a kind of a mix. Some of the kids who are behaving as the opposite sex when very young are probably of the kind of that Bailey would call “homosexual transsexuals” (he thinks homosexuality is inherited, apparently) who don’t feel comfortable around boys from a young age due to being very naturally effeminate. But some of the ones who are only picking this up later may be the second kind, where a… Read more »
“‘The Village’ will raise your kids if you don’t. You will be resisted, you will be ridiculed, you will be accused of every thought-crime to the point of being dragged away to jail for imparting Red Pill awareness to them (in the future I expect it to be equated with child abuse).” Or at some point, something will have to give. This cannot continue indefinitely without a conflict. Eventually men will resist, either out of desperation or because they have nothing to lose by doing so. Sooner or later, the Saxon will relearn to hate. And as Dalrock has mentioned… Read more »
The attitude in the manosphere, and really, in a lot of places — just America generally — is “quick-fix.” I’d like to avoid the term “TRP.” because a lot of what passes for TRP in the manosphere is just pseudoscientific sexist/racist/blah. But, teaching both young boys and girls about how to deal with the opposite sex is great. However, you can’t learn the correct lessons to teach without going out and hitting the field. Like, you can’t just sit here and read TRM and then dust off your hands and go”all right, time to repeat this stuff to little Jimmy.”… Read more »
Critical & Sensitive Periods of Brain Development pg10 onward Trauma Impact on the Brain & Body According to the Center for Excellence in Children’s Mental Health (CECMH) (2010), traumatic stress can have an effect on the way the body functions. Some children exposed to repetitive trauma have been shown to have differing levels of cortisol, a critical stress-sensitive hormone. Cortisol is necessary for healthy functioning but damaging when levels are too high or too low. Children as young as six months have been shown to experience significant changes in cortisol levels due to stress. In the book, Please Don’t Label… Read more »
Definition of Psychological Trauma and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
Trauma is defined as a physical or psychological threat or assault to a child’s physical
integrity, sense of self, safety or survival or to the physical safety of another person
significant to the child (Vermont CUPS Handbook, p. 170). Children may experience
trauma as a result of a number of different circumstances, such as: Abuse, including sexual, physical, emotional
Exposure to domestic violence Severe natural disaster, such as a flood, fire, earthquake or tornado
War or other military actions
Abandonment Witness to violence in the neighborhood or school setting, including fights, drive by
shootings, and law enforcement actions
Personal attack by another person or an animal
Kidnapping
Severe bullying
Medical procedure, surgery, accident or serious illness.
http://mentalhealth.vermont.gov/sites/dmh/files/report/cafu/DMH-CAFU_Psychological_Trauma_Moroz.pdf
@Rollo: You are definitely on to something. Children, while pre-rational, are not unobservant. They clearly see where the power lies in their home and mimic – that mimicry is rewarded.
“Not for the muscles, not for the strength, but just for the reference experience of how willpower can change your life.” Oh man, yes. This is the model parenting approach. It’s a hard concept for younger (below 9) to grasp, but the rote lessons are there when they’re older and “hitting the field.” Giving kids access to observable Truth is invaluable, not for the sake of looks, grades, adult approval…but for the sake of self-preservation and improvement. At day’s end they’re accountable only to themselves. Appealing to their higher-order volition is the only way to go, otherwise…well, the village has… Read more »
Scray
Show me someone who says otherwise and I’ll show you someone leaning hard on their looks/FAG (and when you adjust the chicks to their looks level, it won’t look so impressive)…or some other crutch.
Seriously you guys with the hard case hard on should ease up a bit… less ego investment… there are millions of “normies” out there who get have gotten laid by good looking girls just by being normies… let’s not make everything so heroic…
EhIntellect
like working at a local restaurant – 14 y.o. kitchen duty, 16 y.o. waiting tables)
Awesome experience builder… nice.
as to your wife, she needs to transition into serving them from raising them… that’s her next step… and then she will be filled with their appreciation…
@sentient
Seriously you guys with the hard case hard on should ease up a bit… less ego investment…
It’s not ego investment, it’s the truth.
Once you adjust for the guy’s looks, most dudes in the game are just using them as a crutch or using FAG. Sorry.
there are millions of “normies” out there who get have gotten laid by good looking girls just by being normies
Exceptions that prove the rule.
And honestly, normies being “normies” almost never get hotties for commitment free short-term sex. That’s borderline nonsense.
Through their persisting anxiety and inability to contain their persisting hyperarousal symptoms, the primary caretakers build into their children a mirroring hyperarousal fear response— a form of vicarious traumatization. And, if the “caretaker” is the source 286 Infant Mental Health Journal of the trauma, the child’s emotional survival depends on a zone of safety that includes new, true caretakers. Different events at different times in the life of an individual are likely to result in a different combination of adaptive responses. An infant, a child, and an adolescent experience the same event in different ways. What may be extremely traumatic… Read more »
Scray
Come now
And honestly, normies being “normies” almost never get hotties for commitment free short-term sex. That’s borderline nonsense.
Haven’t you been in high school and college? social circles…
Mark Dice trolls millennials asking “What the hell is wrong with your generation?” which is pretty funny in itself. He has other similar vids, such as asking people what they thought of Trump’s sons shooting tricerotops in Africa. Seems to be on the beach in SoCal all the time, so there’s definitely a self-selected pool he’s fishing in.
But about half way through a couple of girls complain that no one approaches in real life, it’s all virtual. He riffs on that than they agree. Tiny confirmation of YaReally observations from his club scene.
@sentient
Haven’t you been in high school and college? social circles…
that isn’t “normies” being “normies.” There are a lot of things happening there that apparently you aren’t aware of.
like lol at you saying the college pussy scene = “normies” being “normies.”
lmfao.
After following along here for a few years, reading all the past blogs/comments and steadily applying my learnings (from other sites, too), I now believe I can say it’s been a successful turnaround from a BP marriage to one in which I now am captain and commander of me and my family. I am still awed from time-to-time at how much things have changed for the better. Not only with the wife, but with handling people in general. Many of the same principles apply to other social contexts like work environments and on that front my life has also improved… Read more »
All of this reminds me of an observation from a psycho-physiology course I attented at university. The Dr giving the course mentionned that in the 1920s, it was fashionnable for upper-class parents to have their children lobotomized. Kept them real calm it seems.
“I at least want to give a big heartfelt thanks to Rollo and each of you for shining a beacon of light for those of us adrift.”
The story goes that Kaiser Wilhelm while observing Swiss military manuvers asked a Swiss militiaman: “You are 500,000 and you shoot well, but if we attack with 1,000,000 men what will you do?” The soldier replied: “We will shoot twice and go home.”
Shine the beacon on two more men, just two, and you can go home.
” . . . in the 1920s, it was fashionnable for upper-class parents to have their children lobotomized. Kept them real calm it seems.”
I used to know a guy whose father was a brain surgeon, and lobotomized his own son.
Guy grew up to be a geologist.
http://pics.imcdb.org/4691/englishman2.jpg
I’d rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.
Rollo
http://wp.me/pXWyH-afY
P-p-p-p-pedestalization. Lol, it will never, ever end.
http://i1.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/facebook/000/016/893/1415883908403_wps_3_julien_blanc.jpg
There’s still some hope out there…
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rx_dPwQQozc&w=640&h=360%5D
“I used to know a guy whose father was a brain surgeon, and lobotomized his own son.
Guy grew up to be a geologist.”
Was that last bit autocorrected from ‘scientologist’?
http://wp.me/p4tvpM-1NEu
@blax
cool hormone monkey vid.
The other day I nearly burst with pride while watching my son (10 yro) take that man-sized chainsaw and start cutting wood for the stove. I consciously give him tasks that require effort and problem solving. The wife’s idea of helping him consists of lowering the bar and/or giving hints and answers. She does this because it makes her feel bad to see him struggle. I scold her for putting her own feelz over the interests of the the boy. He needs to learn the sweet taste of victory only attainable from his own perseverance and will to succeed. Better… Read more »
“Was that last bit autocorrected from ‘scientologist’?”
Nope. Guy had the affect of a slate and found his emotional level in his profession.
https://youtu.be/QJM2nAtyFMo
@dr zipper
Interested! Starting point, steps, blow by blow …
@Scray: what is FAG? I’d try looking it up but in this particular case I doubt I’d find what you meant.
@KFG: is the geologist thing a joke?
” is the geologist thing a joke?”
Ha, ha only serious. Yes, it’s a joke, but the particulars are facts.
@IAS
Fuck-Up Avoidance Game.
Basically just keeping your mouth shut and letting the presumption of your alpha/beta trait ratio created by your looks work in your favor.
@ scray
….lol. That’s red meat and determination man.
@Tom
As a father of a girl and awaiting the second one this is my problem too:
“teaching them how to identify the right men in the Sexual Marketplace may prove to be an ongoing challenge”
After my Red Pill transition I started to evaluate fellow men for their values. I don’t really see many men that I would find to be a good prospect as a husband. How the heck will she be able to find one?
And then he did the full Princess Proposal:
http://blogs.rep-am.com/temp/otr/2010/03/DP-Nelson-300×267.jpg
@blax
lol sure dude.
he’s 6’1 and 341 pounds with fairly prominent abdominal muscles (high bf if he were a bodybuilder but low bodyfat for a strongman)…liiiike, lmfao…
i have some oceanfront property in nebraska to sell you.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lobotomy#Effects
And the guy drove one of these:
Beige Checker Marathon. Chicks dig a practical car.
@pellaeon When you say club, my mind instantly pictures waiting in a long line to get into a room packed inch to inch with bodies with music blaring so loud that it physically hurts. Is this the same thing you’re taking about? My mind boggles at the idea of trying to START with that kind of environment. In my mind, I think of these as like – the boss level of learning game. to add what yareally posted in the last thread, #1 thing you do when you get there early is chat up the bartenders. easy to do “hey… Read more »
@scray
” he’s 6’1 and 341 pounds with fairly prominent abdominal muscles (high bf if he were a bodybuilder but low bodyfat for a strongman)…liiiike, lmfao…”
Lol…okay dude. Here’s one for ya.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l84vmuuuHRg&w=640&h=360%5D
@blax
you seem to have missed the point.
this dude is also a hormone monkey.
you should go look at the natty fed records for the lifts (the ones that actually test)….
@ Scray
….waitaminute!!! We already had this conversation last year!!!!
Now I remember.
@blax
well you’re still posting this stuff lol
@ Andras I accept my daughter’s impending hypergamous nature. She doesn’t need to be a clueless bitchy brat though. If she enters sexual life understanding what’s at stake (more partners = more dysfunction in life, mentally, socially), that’s pretty good. She’s already lined up her beloved (the ex-NFL quarterback’s 9 y.o. boy), is quiet about her natural desire to have him, but is always around his macho sports gang. She’s sly. “Can she bake a cherry pie, Billy boy” ain’t just a folk song, it’s a window into what girls, my daughter included, should deem valuable entering a relationship. What… Read more »
“you should go look at the natty fed records for the lifts (the ones that actually test)….”
https://www.muscleandstrength.com/articles/strong-strength-standards-raw-natural-lifters
Ha. I don’t think there is anything wrong with T supplementation, but those dudes definitely are doing something.
kfg
Guy had the affect of a slate and found his emotional level in his profession.
So he’s a real rock star?
Oh this thought too: Fatherhood demands we walk the line of metering out experience, controlled frustration and failure, living as an example of sexuality that is understandable and healthy. RP can be cynically poisonous to some. Seeing life through the untrammeled prism healthy sex is liberating for my marriage and my daughter learns indirectly. When my daughter sees the wife kiss me with desire, she gets that within marriage, there is healthy, secure happiness with men, an allowable output for her tingles. When/how to find that guy? Consider the college scene. A young woman will experience, perhaps unknowingly, rapidly dwindling… Read more »
@EhIntellect, it’s the norm now for girls to party through college, then for the next few years afterwards. They say they want to marry, but it’s mostly “someday” which means at age 29.99. I see grad student and post doc girls in the 22 to 28 age group all the time with a mix of defiant “my way! ME!” and growing desperation. A lot of them have deeply inculcated the idea that bitchiness is the way of the “strong and independent” girl, so they are harder to approach and frankly not necessarily worth it for any LTR. Girls need to… Read more »
@ sfer One last thing and I’m off the weight thing. In highschool we had a 300 pound bench club. Practically the entire football team qualified, with a few exceptions, and even a bunch of baseball and track dudes did also. This was in the late 70’s. Teenagers. You got a nice T-Shirt with a barbell with the numbers ” 300 ” on them. I can assure you that NO ONE was using roids, unlike high school athletes today. I wont quibble with M&S because they are talking about the average gym dude trying to get strong, but they seem… Read more »
If you really want your daughter to get into a LTR in college send her to a school with a high M/F ratio like cal tech. Most colleges have low M/F ratios and that means that the high value dudes don’t want to get into a LTR and the dudes that do look needy. In a school with a high M/F ratio, the high value dudes race to tie up the cutest freshmen females each year.
My kind of workout
@ASD – Uhh, there are better twin studies showing how invitro hormonal exposure is just about perfectly correlated with sexual orientation. Genetic twins in which only one got high levels of estrogen. The genetic studies at 52 pct are no better than a coin toss, a random draw when the outcome is binary.
@AgentP – We are talking about how invitro hormonal exposure effects genetic expression during fetal development, and its connection to sexual orientation. Not the testosterone levels of young boys.
And we are done, fyi.
@blax Practically the entire football team qualified, with a few exceptions, and even a bunch of baseball and track dudes did also. This was in the late 70’s. Teenagers. so back in the day a super select group of HS athletes were able to do something super select? nowai! http://powerlifter-400.blogspot.com/ idk if it’s as rare as 1/3,000, but ya…most dudes when it comes to the gym, talk MAD shit or just have hazy memories or whatever. how do i know? because i see it at least once a month. see when you start ACTUALLY DOING impressive shit, you get a… Read more »
@ hank holiday This is all solid advise for clubs and bars. Most important thing when you go out solo and sober as a beginner is in my experience to find a way to not let the environment dwarf you and get you in your head right away when you enter. I struggle with this forever. Like say you were amped up and in a great mood at home and even walking to the club, then you enter and there is music blasting, lights flashing, dudes staring at you, some amazing dolled up goddess walks by, someone shouting something in… Read more »
@Rollo, Thanks for this post. Since I started reading your blog (and after choking down the basic Red Pill concepts several years ago), I’ve been most interested in topics regarding parenting. By way of context, I’m basically the same age as yourself, and also happily married. However, I have more children, both boys and girls. I’m more or less persuaded by your basic concepts, or a least they are consistent with my own observations. However, one issue that I’ve been mulling around in my head for awhile is how much “Red Pill Truth” to give to my sons. I likely… Read more »