Attitude Sells

attitude_sells

There are many attitudinal and subtle behavior traits that manifest in men who are presented with options or enjoy even casual social proof. I’m not sure a lot of guys really realize just how sensitive women are to those ‘tells’. You will do things, say things, without thinking about them that indicate on a limbic level what you believe about yourself. Women have evolved to perceive the smallest cues and subtlest of hints – to the point it’s a subconscious subroutine running in their background processing of information about you when they’re not even cognitively aware of it.

They may not be able to consciously put a finger on it, but on some level of consciousness these tells are informing a woman’s limbic understanding of your SMV.

I’ve gone back and forth about covert communications vs. overt communications on this blog over the years. There is a certain school of Game that teaches a bold, direct action wherein a guy overtly inserts himself into that woman’s immediate experience and I can certainly see the merits of it.

Law 28
Enter into action with boldness

If you are unsure of a course of action, do not attempt it. Your doubts and hesitations will infect your execution. Timidity is dangerous: better to enter with boldness. Any mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity. Everyone admires the bold; no one honors the timid.

There is a certain gravitas that accompanies an extroverted approach with women, the trick is not coming off as a ‘try hard’ and overplaying it, thereby overtly confirming your following a script. When you don’t believe it’s you it’s a pretty good bet she doesn’t either.

A lot of proponents of this in-your-face approach will tell you it’s the only way a “real” man should interact with women; boldly and confidently, and entirely on his terms. And while I agree with this, how you go about effecting that can vary depending on context and condition.

When a guy is initially establishing Frame and drawing the woman (women) of his choosing into his reality, that overt, direct approach can be the deciding factor for a woman’s acquiescing to his Frame. Caught up in the moment (such as an ‘insta-date’ or an encounter she wasn’t expecting) and charging her with an immediate rush of endorphins, a woman’s Hypergamous filtering process gets overridden by that excitement. This is the same principle operating behind planning dates with an excitement factor involved (rock climbing, sky diving, are both exaggerations, but you get the idea) – an emotional attachment paired with an endorphin rush associates that ‘feeling’ with you.

There’s a tendency I think for Red Pill aware men to view women’s Hypergamous / Solipsistic natures as hinderances to men effecting their own interests with them. Shit tests, filtering, sexual prospect comparison and a whole host of other conscious and subconscious vetting inherent to women seems like an insufferable waste of effort for men. However, while Hypergamy may define the rules of the game it’s important for men to understand how to work it to their advantage in both a direct approach and in understanding the subtle filtering that women do.

I’ve read more than a few ‘dating gurus’ define this “being direct with her” approach as the only legitimate form of Game. A Real Man® sees what he wants and goes out and boldly gets it. The problem is that this attitude gets tied to The Male Catch 22 and any derivation is compared with unmanliness.

As I said, while I agree there’s merit to this directness, it shouldn’t be done at the cost of understanding how women subconsciously vet and filter to better discern a man’s (perceptively) true sexual market value to her – as well as how she contrasts his SMV to her self-perceived SMV. There is nothing “unmanly” about having a curiosity for how the female mind works and then using that understanding to your advantage.

Maintaining Frame

It’s one thing to draw that woman into your reality and your psychological Frame, it’s another to maintain this Frame once she’s stepped into it.

I went into some of the subtle ‘tells’ about a man’s SMV in Alpha Tells and Beta Tells and the subcommunication messaging that transfers between men and women. In these posts I described the process beneath those tells and what’s being communicated in them. One thing I believe even Red Pill aware men subscribe to is the idea that their Frame can only be maintained by the same overt and bluntly direct means that helped them create it.

This is the root of men’s initial anxiety of having to upkeep their Red Pill “act”; “Red Pill is impossible to float all the time! What? Am I expected to Game my LTR forever?” The answer of course is internalizing Red Pill awareness into one’s personality, but one thing that also goes along with that is the manifesting of behaviors that help maintain your Frame.

Women pick up on behavioral cues, attitude, how things affect you, how you apply yourself to a task, how you deal with adversity and certainly the interplay you engage in with her while playing with her. If you’re thinking that women wanting men who Just Get It is all direct Game and all above board you need to reconsider that quite a bit of women’s filtering occurs when you’re not ‘on‘ and she’s casually picking up on your behavioral cues.

She want’s you to ‘get it’ on your own, without having to be told how. That initiative and the experience needed to have had developed it makes you a Man worth competing for. Women despise a man who needs to be told to be dominant. Overtly relating this to a guy entirely defeats his credibility as a genuinely dominant male. The guy she wants to fuck is dominant because that’s ‘the way he is’ instead of who she had to tell him to be.

Observing the process will change it. This is the root function of every shit test ever devised by a woman. If masculinity has to be explained to a man, he’s not the man for her.

Much of a woman’s vetting process takes place in her hindbrain. It’s very easy for most guys in western(ized) culture to presume that hot, but vapid, women are too oblivious to really pay much attention to this process. Lost in their hedonism and self-affirmations it’s easy to believe that those processes aren’t as influential in hook-ups as they might be in a long term arrangement, but trust that even though they might be under the surface they are being processed.

Mindset

It’s a Tomassi Maxim now, but bears repeating; Alpha is a mindset, not a demographic. I’ve explained what I mean by this on many occasions, but when it comes to what I consider the abstraction that is Alpha it can primarily be reduced to a particular mindset of masculine dominance and confidence.

I wont belabor this here again, but suffice to say that while I believe there is a natural component to it, I do think that to varying degrees this Alpha mindset, or something approaching it, is a learnable state for men. That said, I also think men need to use caution when when evaluating how to go about cultivating and internalizing this mindset.

It’s very easy to get caught up in the hope for a magic solution to your problems in life. There’s no shortage of motivational speakers and charismatic ‘self-help’ gurus ready to sell you a book, or a sermon, or some self-styled social movement promising to show you how to develop this “winners’ mindset”. It’s important to bear in mind that any mindset you learn is only as legitimate as the realities that inform it.

A lot of hate directed at PUAs, motivational speakers, pastors or even your parents can be traced back to their failings in understanding simple evidential realities. Their hopeful formulas for your success end up being frustrations and anxieties when they’ve proven to fail you because you invest yourself in part, or in whole, in them.

Much of what constitutes Blue Pill conditioning is founded in the same misgivings. It’s very easy to hype up and sensationalize Blue Pill idealisms in ‘optimism’ soaked rhetorics, but these hopes are easily dispelled with a Red Pill aware lens. That’s one reason the Red Pill can be bitter – it’s a real buzz kill when you’re high on Blue Pill optimism.

The primary reason I’ve always been reluctant to be prescriptive with Red Pill awareness in practice is because I’ve always believed that the Red Pill is never going to be one size fits all. While Red Pill truths are universal, their application is subjective to the man employing them. How he develops the mindset that best serves him is contextual to his own circumstance.

That said, I think a pragmatic approach based on Red Pill awareness and the fundaments that make it up would serve men best in developing a Red Pill mindset that works for him. You might think that in light of my recent Purple Pill post that I’m alluding to the ‘coaches’ and re-definers of the Red Pill in all this, but lots of “Red Pill” men are actually Purple Pill hoping that some of the old rules might still apply.

While I emphatically recognize the power of positive thought in altering one’s mindset and changing the course of one’s life, I also understand that zeal for change needs to be tempered with a healthy skepticism. If you find yourself being swept up in a tide of super-optimism that’s the time to question the foundations of it. Positive, motivational memes can become clichéd aphorisms when those foundations are proven to be false.

Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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theasdgamer
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@ YaReally In some venues, some broad nearing 60 who’s still trim and around a HB6 (top 0.1 % of her age) and the hottest broad in the place will have chodes panting after her. So you change venues. The same broad won’t get any attention from top men when she’s competing with 20-something HB7s. However, because she expects to get attention from the top men, she will still be hard to game. That broad will revert to the venue where she got a lot of attention from top men. Younger HB6s and HB7s are easier to game than older… Read more »

Thoroughbred
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I have noticed that sometimes there are such vast differences in my behavioural output in my initial interactions with women I have approached that are so divorced from my actual emotional state, that I have to consider some form of subconscious action in play. When I approach some women I “beta out”. It’s not that I feel particularly intimidated by this woman, but it seems like a part of me it screening myself out for her, through no intention of my own. Other times, I pull off an effortless interaction so flawlessly, and engage a woman’s attraction parameters so thoroughly,… Read more »

SJF
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“I don’t buy everything Deida writes, mind you, but he was far more in touch with reality back when he wrote that book…….” Even though Deida has a brighter, syrupy, mystical world view than I can personally sign on to, he also has amazing wisdom on the masculine and the feminine hind and middle brain. It’s his estimation of the fore-brain that is exactly what Rollo is cautioning about when he says: “It’s important to bear in mind that any mindset you learn is only as legitimate as the realities that inform it.” I can see someone subscribing to all… Read more »

SJF
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“It leads me to conclude that there is some subconscious selection going on, both sides of the fence and that there is a reason why some approaches go better than others.”

The old hind-brain and limbic system (middle brain) over riding the fore-brain trick? Who would have thunk?

Rocket
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Agree with Rollo’s post about frame and have for awhile. One of the biggest things for people to learn when taking the Red Pill is how important it is to set and maintain frame. It was something that I had never even heard of before … and wow what a game changer … as I found out last Sunday. And have to say that I’m getting way better at it; practice with escorts … with shit on the line … it all counts and of course, practice makes perfect. So last Sunday I got together with a new SB. I… Read more »

kfg
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” . . . Deida has a brighter, syrupy, mystical world view than I can personally sign on to . . .”

I read a few paragraphs of the book’s website and felt like someone was gagging me with a syphilitic spoon. Deida is a New Age woman. I can see why Lee Lee would like it and finally be free to feel like girl after reading it. He writes for girls.

But if he sets some people on the correct path, even if they’re girls, well, I guess.

Rocket
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Once clarification on my post above. She posted her Ad on Tues and that’s when I took her to dinner. Got together for real the next Sunday.

Also want to say that I haven’t been here in a week or so. Said some things that were out of line and probably owe a couple of dudes an apology. Never went back and looked, maybe I took flack already. Don’t know, don’t care. So, yeah maybe I was out of line. Sue me, I’m human. Apologies to whoever I offended.

Peace and everyone have a good Thanksgiving !!!

SJF
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@Thoroughbred November 25th, 2015 at 8:33 pm Hey, check out “Is Seduction Real” http://therationalmale.com/2012/07/13/is-seduction-real/ Rollo: “There’s a PUA idiom that states 80% of seduction is simply not fucking up what’s already there. Attraction is not a choice – however, what you do from there is entirely up to you. I think people get hung up on the word “seduction.” It conjures up melodramatic associations of doing something nefarious to tempt someone into doing something against their own interests. In some instances that may be the case, but far more often seduction is really just selling yourself effectively by manipulating the… Read more »

SJF
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@kfg “I read a few paragraphs of the book’s website and felt like someone was gagging me with a syphilitic spoon. Deida is a New Age woman. I can see why Lee Lee would like it and finally be free to feel like girl after reading it. He writes for girls.” It is actually quite voluminous but also concise. There is more content in the actual book and the Amazon samples of chapters are definitely “written for girls”. It is contextual and mostly for LTR based relationships. Like I said it gagged me way back when I didn’t have red… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
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It is actually quite voluminous but also concise. Concise in what sense? The parts I have read are extremely repetitive. That is, he repeats himself a lot. Or you could note that he says the same thing over and over again. And sometimes he writes something he already wrote. That is, he tends to recycle his words. That’s the opposite of concise. It becomes tedious, especially on top of the whole drum-circle, men in the woods, New Age, woo-woo tone. Plus he asserts that women do not lie. That is not true. It is counterfactual. Go look at the reviews… Read more »

Murray Street
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@walawala

Waiting for IOI’s is a girl thing, it basically means you’re waiting for people’s permission to approach them, barring which you’re just gonna lay low.

I’m not gonna front I still have this mindset a lot. But I’m trying to lose it because going after the things you want is a reward in itself.

SJF
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Concise in that each chapter is 2 to 3 pages long (average of 3) for 50 chapters.

I agree with your assessment. It is unpalatable to most males used to reading in the manosphere for sure.

It’s just that I read it now and my brain kind of peels away at the New Age woo-woo shit (which is definitely there) with a Roissy-esque shiv knife to strip away the goo to get the basic ideas.

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Field report
About to sleep. However I just got back from approaching 3 girls this evening. One in particular was fun to dance with. Her name was austin and I asked where she was from and she replied Texas and than I said “Yareally?” She looked puzzled and I started laughing and than she got closer for an embrace. We danced and it happened without thinking. That’s three girls.

More I’m out more I realize the importance of being open to improvement.

Jorge
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M Simon
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charging her with an immediate rush of endorphins This can happen spontaneously with no overt signaling. Pheromones. You are actually exuding your attitude all the time. The LTR and I were getting some take out one time and a gay girl came on to me telling me how attracted to me she was. The LTR was amused. It had already happened to her a few years back. BTW the gay girl’s partner was mega pissed. This happens with enough frequency that the LTR is amused by it (women getting stupid in my presence). I’m not rock star good at it… Read more »

M Simon
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I’m reposting this from a dead thread: ********************************************* I saw an Alpha/Beta relationship work once. My Mom and Dad. Dad did all the usual Alpha tricks “Look at those tits.” He was a natural. He was also the consummate Beta house guy. (some evenings and most weekends) So how did they get it to work? My mother was able to do something “modern” feminism is not ready for. In fact they no longer know how. SURRENDER to my Dad. What used to be taught to women: Find the right man (your family will restrict you in some cultures). Surrender to… Read more »

M Simon
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Re: Your attitude determines how you smell.

It ought to be possible to do a GC/MS on the smells people exude. This could be chemically tested. Then companies would spring up promising to teach you to be more Alpha and testing you before and after to prove it. Or there might be an “Alpha pill”.

All that might cause longer noses for women to be selected for. More area for receptors. Giving a better chance to detect “fakes”. The “faking” might work for a generation or two.

Xabi
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@Rollo I’m not playing I’m trying to help. Ok, so the 5-stages of grieving is nothing new here. Great to see. In my defense, it is not reasonable to pretend that I could read all previous entries of this blog, so many and I don’t have time. So I picked the line of reasoning opened by the last entries and tried to elaborate from there. The discourse in the manosphere goes often in circles anyway, it is not the first time a read “attitude sells” somewhere. In fact I don’t think it can be called RP wisdom at all. At… Read more »

walawala
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Boldness…it’s easier when you’re not invested either emotionally or financially. My best moments were when I really didn’t care. My worst moments were when I started to care. I’m now struggling with this because not caring feels “strange”—it’s residual codependency that I’ve been working to overcome. I’m involved in a variety of businesses and projects and have to stop myself when I do my pitches to avoid sounding needy and employ “assume the sale”. instead of “Would you like to join?’ it’s “Join!” instead of “Would you like to come out?” I’m employing “Come out!” The results in my sales… Read more »

kfg
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@walawala:

” “Would you like to meet for drinks sometime?” produces an instant response . . .”

. . . of yes or no.

Remember the old salesman trick of offering a choice that assumes the sale when you are ready to close:

“Do you want the blue one or the red one?”
“Let’s go meet for drinks, Joe’s Place or Franks?”

The only direct answer to these questions is yes or yes.

theasdgamer
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@ walawala

Boldness…it’s easier when you’re not invested either emotionally or financially. My best moments were when I really didn’t care. My worst moments were when I started to care.

Some women take advantage of men who invest too much emotionally–maneaters. They put claws in your emotions. It’s a pain learning to deal with them.

danielkad
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The greatest dilemma for me is that the red pill is often used in a negative way. Some guys use the red pill knowledge to convince themselves how horrible women are and they are not worth it. Or they convince themselves to just superficially interact with them instead from opening up to emotional intimacy. “I just use them” Fact is as blue pill men we were not good either. We wanted to control women by submission and moralistic blackmailing. “Look I am such a good guy and I do everything for you so you have to love me.” Often a… Read more »

Pilot75
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Or, just be confident and quit worrying what nasty American women think about you….Who cares. I don’t chase them, don’t PUA them and don’t inflate their hypergalactic egos one cintilla. I’ve still managed to be with so many I’ve lost count over the years by doing this. Hmmmm…..Strange how that works. Stop chasing, ignore them sometimes and just live your own interesting life.

Forge the Sky
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@Rocket Lol, ya we kinda tore you up last week. It’s not the content it’s the tone. You sound much more sure of yourself this time around. It’s not my strategy (I’m young and poor lol) but glad it’s working out for ya. @MSimon Thanks for posting forward! Sometimes it’s hard to decide when to re-post something when a thread just dies on ya. I’ve written a few times about the few marriage relationships I’ve seen to really work well, and it’s interesting stuff. I do have to conclude that very happy marriages just aren’t all that accessible to most… Read more »

SJF
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“Re: smell – I was just debating this the other day with SJF. He thought it was unlikely that smell could influence much.”

Heheh, though, what do I know. I’m undoubtedly a pheromonal beta and my nose is not that skilled, nor is my hind, mid-limbic or fore-brain skillful enough or thirsty enough to pick up or discriminate feminine pheromones. Best ignore what I argued. “Too much noise around to discriminate” was my argument.
Umm, sorry?

Forge the Sky
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@SJF

Take off your sunglasses next time.

SJF
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hoellenhund2
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Other guys are better looking, bigger, taller, more jacked, whiter, richer, with nicer suits (especially when he started out VS now that he’s loaded) etc than this guy…so why do girls buy him $50,000 watches?

What is he offering that those other guys aren’t? It’s clearly not external.

That was an interesting video. Also interesting, I should add, is the description at the end by Jake Adelstein about the mundane reality of host clubs. It seems to be a classic example of one form of social dysfunction leading to another. It’s amusing to watch the things societies do to abolish themselves.

kfg
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Just thought I’d mention that I’m thankful for the work that Rollo has put into The Rational Male.

kobayashii1681
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@kfg: “Just thought I’d mention that I’m thankful for the work that Rollo has put into The Rational Male.”

Fucking-A!!!!

To Rollo, for helping me on my way to not having to dodge bullets!

kobayashii1681
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@danielkad: “Some guys use the red pill knowledge to convince themselves how horrible women are and they are not worth it.” Key word here is ‘SOME’. Probably those who are still looking to blue pill heaven, the ‘nice guy rapture’ as it were…especially after having their eyes ripped open by RP knowledge and consciousness. Their eyes heart and they long for the lies of the past. RP helps us appreciate women, within specific context and perspective. “Or they convince themselves to just superficially interact with them instead from opening up to emotional intimacy.” I see red flags when I read… Read more »

kobayashii1681
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*their eyes hurt

Forge the Sky
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@Thoroughbred “I have noticed that sometimes there are such vast differences in my behavioural output in my initial interactions with women I have approached that are so divorced from my actual emotional state, that I have to consider some form of subconscious action in play. When I approach some women I “beta out”. It’s not that I feel particularly intimidated by this woman, but it seems like a part of me it screening myself out for her, through no intention of my own. Other times, I pull off an effortless interaction so flawlessly, and engage a woman’s attraction parameters so… Read more »

GRock
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“There is nothing “unmanly” about having a curiosity for how the female mind works and then using that understanding to your advantage.” I’ve had an Ex (LTR) of mine who knows I study and apply red pill, and after years of practice, it’s become part of my mindset. I simply have changed myself.. for the better. It’s gotten under her skin so badly, knowing the very information I discovered largely led to our split. Naturally the usual shaming has followed. While I have her blocked from my phone, I’ve gotten literally a year’s worth of emails denouncing me. Funny how… Read more »

theasdgamer
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@ Forge

The other one is consciously opposed to trying to fuck me (she’s aiming for a BB currently and doesn’t want to fuck it up lol) and she aggressively drives my attention away. Trying to mate-guard herself basically. But somehow she keeps on being around….

Re: “she aggressively drives my attention away”

How does she do this? Could she be shit testing you?

It sounds to me like she might be conflicted and you need to spike her buying temp and provide a rationale for her to put you in the AF category and bang you.

theasdgamer
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@ GRock Funny how she finds my value high enough to emotionally hold onto the “new me” and refuse to let go, despite me letting go of her….this is a great tell as to knowing you’re applying the knowledge well. The truly bad choice women you dump just can’t get over you. You picked the lock to many of their instincts, and it’s very powerful. Well done. These are fun to demolish. “You’re a douche still gaming women at your age.” You: The Creepy Old Guys Club is having a meeting next week. We’re supposed to bring our exes. “Real… Read more »

theasdgamer
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You guys can see some text game on my blog.

e.g., https://theasdgamer.wordpress.com/2015/11/26/hand-to-hand-combat-with-maneaters/ and the comments in my turkey stuffing post

Look at the girls’ emotional responses. InsanityBytes is intrigued by my feelings of vulnerability. You know the whole James Dean thing. But it has to be real.

Forge the Sky
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@asd Heh, champ replies re: GRock’s girl. “How does she do this? Could she be shit testing you? It sounds to me like she might be conflicted and you need to spike her buying temp and provide a rationale for her to put you in the AF category and bang you.” She drives my attention away by being aggressively dismissive of things I say, and by trying to order me around. She’s sweet as a bell to most people (and previously was to me too) – that’s the default she has to people she’s indifferent to. She was overtly into… Read more »

redlight
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@forge

I tell her cool stories about things I do enthusiastically

what would happen if you just totally ignored her always?

(besides saving a few paragraphs)

@GRock

While I have her blocked from my phone, I’ve gotten literally a year’s worth of emails denouncing me

set up email filter (filter to delete message), never read shit

like if we could have filters here, I would never see emily

Dragonfly
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Rollo, just saw my brother again tonight… doing so great, loving his life, taking any punches that come with normal life and rolling with them like it doesn’t even really matter – such a positive, amazing attitude. He was responding to texts from a girl he’s interested in and told me how he has her texting him – she’s pursuing him. He was looking at text game and laughing and joking with my husband and I about how well it’s going and how it’s so much fun. As you can imagine… I’m over the moon happy for him. He has… Read more »

Forge the Sky
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@redlight Ignoring her completely is actually the projected goal. I’m starting to get more of a perspective of, ‘why the hell am I interacting with someone who doesn’t give me value sans drama?’ I still fall for some of her crap sometimes tho. She’s good at manipulation. Lol, this is a work in progress. I wrote so much about it bc I thought some of it was interesting, not because I think others should imitate that example. Besides, it’s decent shit-test/frame practice. There’s never a way to totally avoid drama, of course. The most drama I’ve ever been through was… Read more »

redlight
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@forge

Maybe the best thing to do is act beta

I’ve done this and it is amazingly effective as long as you play up the beta (“I’ve been so stressed out at work since I lost the stapler I like, it was my bestie, that reminds me the problem with Disney movies is that they make me cry every time”). They never ever come back.

However if you want to keep your options open, just ignore her

Forge the Sky
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@Dragonfly Appreciate your admiration of men finding their masculinity. I live amongst conservative values, and even here most women – even if they implicitly react very well to masculinity – explicitly demean it. I’m just starting to realize how much that is happening, and how very draining it is. Yesterday a pretty girl was telling me how cocky I am. And though I could see the admiration in her eyes, I still had to find clever ways to reframe and deflect her conversation. Just sometimes I wish women would approve with their eyes and their words simultaneously. But the culture… Read more »

Forge the Sky
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@redlight lol, I’m gonna do my best. She’s actually a clever girl, for a while now she’s been able to find ways to make me think I actually needed to pay attention to her this time. And I’m not very naive. But I’m coming to the conclusion that anything except a bloodcurdling scream from her probably doesn’t signal real need, so cya bitch. Last time I saw her I finally was done. I gave her a (I now realize) disdainful look as I took my leave, and she seemed smitten by it. So strange, that one. She merits a distant,… Read more »

Rocket
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@Forge the sky “@Rocket Lol, ya we kinda tore you up last week. It’s not the content it’s the tone. ” As I said, I haven’t visited since then. Tore up a couple of dudes and realized the next morning that maybe I was outta line; so stayed away. So I got some blowback; to be expected, I guess. Its all good. One thing I like about places like this and why I participate here … its honest. I don’t claim to be perfect. I fuck up and make mistakes and take heat for it. Doesn’t mean I’m a horrible… Read more »

theasdgamer
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@ Forge she found her current BB target and a wall came down when she gets bored with him the wall will evaporate, heh I get the ruthless shit testing…prob wants very rough sex…rape fantasies…slapping…hard spanking…ripping her clothes off…calling her a whore…only thing to do is try it Check out my To Spank or Slap post for some dominance stuff you can do in public. https://theasdgamer.wordpress.com/2015/11/22/slapping-her-silly/ J was standing between two tables which were about three feet apart. I immediately took J by the back with both hands and moved her so that I blocked her exit. It was a… Read more »

tmach5
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Rollo,
Your philosophy seems more in tune with “Tyler Durden” than “R. Tomassi.” Why did you choose ” the guy that got away” as your nom d’plume?

scribblerg
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This speaks for itself…All I know is that I want to drown the androgynous fuck in the video. He generates a visceral loathing in me, as he’s so anti-masculine. This is some woman’s fantasy, right?
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UVNT4wvIGY&w=560&h=315%5D

Striver
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Striver
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ScribblerG Don’t hate on the androgyny. It has always been my experience that androgyny, effeminate men, that is a way in for some men. Women are circular, they are not like us. They want emotional spikes, whatever the direction, more than men. Talk about happy or sad to a man. He will make one of two choices. Either he wants to specialize in sad and will try to feel it as much as possible. Or he will say “sad sucks” and try to make himself happy, try to avoid it. Women don’t care about the difference between happy and sad… Read more »

SJF
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@Striver “Men think by mastering a particular thing, lifting, mastering game, it will guarantee success. That is malethink. Women don’t think that way.” Men may think they will gain a completion in life by thinking and wanting. As if the wanting is sufficient. But “acting” is their key to success. And it’s not what you decide to master. It is the desire to master and the act of mastering that matters. Something that the protagonist/singer/songwriter failed to do–he failed to master the unknowns in the relationship and act upon them, not just sit around thinking of what he wanted, rather… Read more »

A Definite Beta Guy
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Thanks guys, hope you’re all having a good thanksgiving. I hate my MIL’s family. My MIL is one of 11. The Sisters dominate the entire family. They are catty and gossipy and almost none of them can actually cook. Fewer side-dishes than the Friendsgiving my Wife and I staged, turkey so dry might as well have been beef jerky. The Brothers are all Beta in frame. About half turned into true Gamma. About half turned into some serious provider Beta, though….big business guys (CEO and entrepreneur). They don’t show up to many family events. Too busy. It’s a Wisconsin party…but… Read more »

kfg
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kfg
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“The Packers lost.”

Oh bloody hell. My closest friend of the past 15 years is an owner. Now I’m going to have to pretend not to be home for a week or two if I don’t want to hear the whining for hours.

King Kunta
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First time commenting on this forum. Let me first thank Rollo for the insight and the wisdom. I have always been good with women and the dynamic of dating. I never knew why. Thanks to the manosphere in general and rollo in particular, I can now link the dots. Before I met the mother of my son, I was what many will call a Alpha male. By the way, my family gave me the nickname of Alpha. I still don’t know why. Although I did what I wanted and did not care about people’s judgments. Girls offered me sex on… Read more »

scribblerg
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@SJF – ++This: “Men may think they will gain a completion in life by thinking and wanting. As if the wanting is sufficient. But “acting” is their key to success. And it’s not what you decide to master. It is the desire to master and the act of mastering that matters.” This sparked a thought in me about the nature of “delayed gratification”. It seems to me that as a younger man I bought into this idea that “someday” I’d be able to live my life for my own purposes, but in the meantime I’d better go be a Dad… Read more »

kfg
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” . . . most of the guys who were long term yacht brokers were bums or drunks . . .”

You coulda done worse. You coulda been delivery crew.

“There is something about being in action, being kinetic . . .”

. . . that keeps one from being a plant.

A Definite Beta Guy
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Scribblerg, Regarding what Feminism gives women. Thoughts here: http://adefinitebetaguy.blogspot.com/2015/11/what-does-feminism-give-women.html Summary: It works for young women in college and peak SMV years. See, they do not WANT relationships, and they do not want marriages. They want to party. They want beta emotional sponges on the side. They want to leave relationships on a whim and monkey-branch to another guy. They want to have one night stands, with no judgements. They want to have anal sex with exchange students and cry rape when convenient. Feminism isn’t the end goal. The Feminine Imperative is the end goal. Feminism is a tool towards that… Read more »

Amit
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@King Kunta

Hey mate, hell of a story. Its good to see your making things work within a marriage situation. Also, nice to see another London person here. There are only a couple of people I know around me who are Red Pill aware.

A

SJF
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“There is something about being in action, being kinetic . . .” that keeps one from being a plant. ” …..thrusting oneself into the world that gives one momentum. @ScribblerG Do me a favor. (And I won’t take no for an answer, heheh). Go back and read the last chapter of Marc Lewis’ “Biology of Desire” in regards to what you are currently going through and see how the kinetic movement helps in the neuroplastic rewiring of your brain to get you out of the rut you were in last year. Keep moving forward through the winter and spring. Accept… Read more »

scribblerg
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@DefBetaGuy – I understand what you are saying, of course there are payoffs from feminism for women. I was thinking at more of an existential level. Lee Lee’s comment revealed her own existential angst stemming from thinking her natural feminine ways were “wrong” or “crazy”. She’s been told she doesn’t need a man and should be happy living independently etc. The way Lee Lee described it gave me insight about how difficult the “Strong Independent Woman” role is for women. Just as I felt shamed for being aggressive and dominant due to social pressure, it seems that Lee Lee felt… Read more »

scribblerg
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@SJF – Amazing how you just “got” where I’m at. The cite you posted is so spot on and I hope most men here get the significance of it. The neuroscience discussed in The Biology of Desire is in no way limited to “addiction”. Rather, it is about how desire itself arises and how behavior is driven by the neurology involved. Anything you desire is affected in the same way. It also looks deeply at pleasure and the “governing” functions of our brains and this is relevant to everything we do. Watching too much TV, eating, video games, in no… Read more »

scribblerg
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This is what a country run by radfem women and informed by a complete capitulation to feminist political sensibilities looks like. [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wP7_yY9m5GM&w=560&h=315%5D Try to wrap your head around it. Sweden is the rape capital of the western world. Watch the entire video – just see how complete the surrender is. I think it’s happening for an even deeper reason. After Swedish feminist politicians denutted Swedish men, and fully institutionalized the Blue Pill and Betaization, they simultaneously started to hate those weak, effeminate men. In foreign Muslims, they find a virile man who has not surrendered to them. It’s “alpha… Read more »

Forge the Sky
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@Scribblerg

http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2015/06/03/ratings-of-muslims-in-france-and-us/

Talk about skewed signalling incentives.

theasdgamer
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Field Report: Awesome night last night. It wasn’t so much because broads were screwing their tits into my chest last night, lol–both friends and random cold approaches–even though they were. It was awesome because I actually felt comfortable holding a friend close around the shoulders as we chatted for five minutes about her trip and looked at her cell phone pics. Big milestone for me with my inhibitions. I didn’t feel awkward at all, surprisingly. This friend is very sweet. I felt affection for my friend as we chatted. (She was wild in her youth but is a Born Again… Read more »

rugby11ljh
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rugby11ljh
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Something to think about.
http://bit.ly/1YA7vLq

SJF
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@Rugby “Something to think about.” NotReally. “You could be forgiven if your first reaction upon hearing about the Southbank Centre’s second annual ‘Being A Man’ festival – an entire weekend of talks, discussions, performances and debates aimed squarely at getting blokes to reflect on the challenges they face in 2015 – is to throw your laptop into the nearest skip and pray for an asteroid to wipe out 50% of the population. A festival for men to talk about men stuff. The very concept of it sounds like something that should never have been allowed to snowball into reality. It’s… Read more »

Sun Wukong
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@SJF

The solution to the crisis in masculinity is clearly more of the same female redefining of masculinity that leads to male suicides as men can’t reach their goals or achieve success. Sounds reasonable to me.

scribblerg
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@SJF and Rugby – I wonder what is Hayden Woolley’s criticism of femininity? Are there not problems with it? Is masculinity the only “fetid, dank and harmful concept”? @Forge – Wow, those stats on French attitudes are terrifying. I won’t get us down the rathole of Islamism too deeply here, but it’s just amazing to me how so many self-anointed geniuses on the left don’t know a thing about Islam and it’s history. Just a few facts about Islam: – It was an imperial, conquering force since it’s inception. To claim that that the West is unique in its imperial… Read more »

keyser Soze
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@scribblerg, Do you know what a Muslim elite / capitalists / oligarchy , have in common with a Christian and a Jewish elite / capitalist / oligarchy? Money and power. Do you think an elite Muslim’s son would become an ISIS? Do you think the elite give a rat’s ass about who comes to Europe and who don’t? Those Muslim nuts were hailed as the great Mujahideen when Regan used them against the Godless Soviets. It was the oil companies that made Roosevelt strike a life long cartel deal with the founder of Saudi Arabia. It was like this :… Read more »

rugby11ljh
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This film has influenced many men in Hollywood and I think the title of the article plays directly with what the film was speaking about.
http://m.imdb.com/title/tt0062229/

Blaximus
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Blaximus
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” Women pick up on behavioral cues, attitude, how things affect you, how you apply yourself to a task, how you deal with adversity and certainly the interplay you engage in with her while playing with her. If you’re thinking that women wanting men who Just Get It is all direct Game and all above board you need to reconsider that quite a bit of women’s filtering occurs when you’re not ‘on‘ and she’s casually picking up on your behavioral cues. ” This is why men should strive to self improve for themselves first and foremost. How you apply yourself… Read more »

Forge the Sky
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@Scribblerg “Think about how arrogant they are. They have concluded that they know how to protect our society and nation better than men – when men have been protecting such things since the dawn of time. Women have no idea how to protect a country or a family, yet they just dismiss all male attitudes about this as defective. It’s epic cuntery.” Women instinctively try to solve problems through consensus-building/diplomacy. And faced with undeniable violence or aggression, their impulse is appeasement. Shows of emotional vulnerability or displays of sexual enticement are the usual go-to’s. We’re just seeing that impulse writ… Read more »

Forge the Sky
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@Blaximus Good stuff, man. Fear is like pain – eventually it just become information. The fear isn’t you, you just need to observe it happening. It takes practice. I’m gonna ramble a bit here but My game is still kinda bullshit for the most part, but by attacking the first, fatal sticking point of approach anxiety I’ve had to observe this. It was terrifying at first, but now I just like do it in spite of the weird feeling, and I don’t much care how hot the girl is. I care still about how many people she’s with, if she… Read more »

Forge the Sky
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Well, it’s late here but I’m still wired from the club so I might as well write up about a recent circumstance I ran into. Sort of a field report, but I’m not sure I should call it that since it was a convo with a girl I’ve known rather than a new approach. HB7 (hard 8 with makeup, it works well for her) that I’ve known for 3-ish years. Always gotten along well with her but it was fairly platonic. She has a live-in BF of 4 years, he’s a natural. I recently caught a few strong IOI’s from… Read more »

IAS
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@Forge and the HB7: I’m not good enough at game, but I worry that she may just be into having you as an orbiter.

redlight
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redlight
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@Forge and the HB7: I’m not good enough at game, but I worry that she may just be into having you as an orbiter.

I would upgrade orbiter to Plan B

scribblerg
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@Forge – Great FRs, thanks. On the HB7, contrary to @IAS above, I don’t get a hit of Beta qualification going on with her. Without knowing more details on the logistics of where you were, it’s hard to say how you could have isolated or escalated better, but my sense is that you have left her hanging. Her ASD is just that – an act, fyi. Don’t take it seriously. I have two concrete suggestions: – I think she’s trying to qualify you as pure short term AF but there some bit of the “nice guy” left in you so… Read more »

theasdgamer
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@ Forge “Forge, I don’t know if I can drink with you! I got waaay to drunk last time you made the drinks…” for the first time, she lost the nervous girly demeanor. Frame test because of ASD. Best response is to flip it with Agree & Amplify…”Yeah, drunk girls are boring…you make the drinks.”…you turn her shit into disqualification (kind of clever) and then delegate drink making to her (more clever shit where you show dominance and still assume the sale)…it has a chance of disarming the ASD, too. Maybe I should have found ways to sexualize the convo… Read more »

scribblerg
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@Keyser – You asked for it (those not interested in politics, just scroll by as I’m going long). I only do this because i’m chilling this morning and feel like writing and also because I think there are many of you in this community who have adopted the feral, pseudo-intellectual worldview Keyser so neatly summarizes in his comment. I’m going to take it apart, piece by piece, just so you guys (Keyser won’t change his mind) realize how superficial such an analysis is. Fyi, just to start, Keyser, tell me, what book(s) are you reading on politics and history right… Read more »

theasdgamer
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@ scribbler mostly agree; keyser’s not entirely wrong The Forbes 500 have significant negative influence on politics. They tolerate gradual change and can be forced to support significant change by leftists by means of govt. pressure. It would be good to eliminate political contributions by all for-profit corporations. It’s also good to keep the size of any institution below 10K employees or they just have too big an impact on our economy, politics, etc. Look at which industries are most affected by federal policies and you will see them donating heavily to leftists. Keyser’s very wrong to say ALL religions… Read more »

Rocket
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Sorry to thread-jack here, not like it already wasn’t though; remember, Rollo doesn’t like to talk about politics or religion and that’s where the discussion has gone. And Rollo doesn’t like to talk about this either … and disagrees with this conclusion quite a bit, lol. Ran across this on reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3ulb3q/5_key_traits_to_be_successful_with_women/ Basically its a list of traits that will make your chances of being successful with women pretty easy. And what you can do about improving those areas. Also throws in some “loopholes” which you can use to “overcome” a lacking in one or more of those key attributes.… Read more »

redlight
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@rocket

the thread has 0 points, is only 38% upvoted, and here is a comment that has 14 points:

One of the worst posts in a while

why recycle garbage?

Rocket
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@redlight “why recycle garbage?” Because its the truth. If you are very short, non-white, ugly, and are an introvert … your odds of being successful into today’s FI dominated climate is ZERO and there is nothing you can do about it. That the kind of news guys want to hear ? Of course not, that’s why its downvoted. Doesn’t mean its not true. But whatever works for you, man. I’m living by those rules (using a Loophole) and its working for me. Fucked the new SB twice yesterday. SB #1 twice the day before. How is “Alpha is just an… Read more »

scribblerg
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@ASD – “The Forbes 500 have significant negative influence on politics. They tolerate gradual change and can be forced to support significant change by leftists by means of govt. pressure. It would be good to eliminate political contributions by all for-profit corporations. It’s also good to keep the size of any institution below 10K employees or they just have too big an impact on our economy, politics, etc.” What fatuous horseshit. In fact, the Forbes 500 and all other private businesses are the engines of huge amounts human progress, you babbling fool. And omigod – businesses have interests and seek… Read more »

theasdgamer
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@ scribbler the eater of meadow muffins “What fatuous horseshit. In fact, the Forbes 500 and all other private businesses are the engines of huge amounts human progress, you babbling fool.” Hey, enough with the intellectual pap. Get both your neurons firing and get off of the knee-jerk conservatism. The fact is that the Forbes 500 push lots of social leftist programs. I’m not a populist, but I realize that the bigger the institution, the greater its power. If that institution gets coopted by leftists, it can do great harm. I’m not saying that they don’t produce jobs, but they… Read more »

redlight
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@rocket

you pay for sex and you need to have a stupid article to prove to you that you have no other choice. whatever works for you, just don’t pitch this bullshit to other men

theasdgamer
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@ scribbler, the imbiber of leftist revisionist whine Funniest is your hamhanded attempt to separate Christianity from bloody violence, lol. I mean, one has to ignore 1000 years of European history to make such a completely ignorant statement. The Thirty Years War brought all this to a head and the West began to reform itself, as Christianity did too. Of course, Christianity and Islam are quite different – none of this means Christianity wasn’t a bloody enterprise for a very long time. No serious historian would argue with this. Not since the 30s, when leftists coopted the history depts. at… Read more »

scribblerg
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@Rocket – First things first – Rollo can speak for himself. We definitely have excursions from the post’s subject covering topics from physics to pizza dough. Rollo doesn’t discuss politics but he has no prohibition on it being discussed here. Now, lets get down to your inanity. Stop bragging about hiring whores – SBs or not. I’ve fucked young hot whores, and I’ve had a couple of girls I fucked who were like mini-SBs and it’s NOTHING LIKE THE VOLUNTARY SURRENDER OF A WOMAN. It’s nothing like actual hot desire. I get it. You don’t want to improve yourself, great,… Read more »

theasdgamer
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@ scribbler, the Constitution scholar wannabe

Your position is actually anti-liberty and anti-First Amendment

Nope. I’m for 1st amendment rights for citizens–not for persons. Citizens can still associate in not-for-profit associations to influence politics. Minimize the political influence of big business.

Sun Wukong
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But whatever you do, stop telling us whoring is the answer. Just stop, you look ridiculous.

Signed. I could afford whores easily on my salary. However, having had actual women with actual desire for me before I am absolutely certain I wouldn’t find it satisfying in the least. It would feel like the obligation sex that happens right before the end of a relationship, and that shit is just awful.

scribblerg
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@ASD – And the lesson in liberty flies right over your head. No surprise but really, stupid isn’t one of my problems on this topic. It sure seems like it is for you though – I mean, I do have a SCOTUS decision on my side. And I’m not a conservative at all. But hey, keep flailing about with your inane thoughts and rhetoric, I’m sure it achieves the result you are seeking – ego defense and aggrandizement. I’m actually trying to sort you out and teach you something but you are not teachable. Fine with me – remain an… Read more »

theasdgamer
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We’re already starting to see the tide turning against Big Business when it comes to media. Small media groups and blogs are causing an increasing percentage of people to ignore MSM. Cable is likewise under attack from Hulu and Netflix. Sports, weather, and local news are cable’s main advantage.

The current attack against Big Ag is a leftist game. I have no position about GMOs, but the whole thing smells of an attempt to purge non-leftists from the FDA.

The new 3D printing industry looks like it could turn into a run around Big Business.

theasdgamer
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scribbler, you’re the only one around here who sounds emotionally out of control, i.e., rabid.

theasdgamer
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No question that Christian sects, including the RC, started fucking around in politics as far back as Constantine and political powers like kings and parliaments started killing and persecuting people. It’s still primarily a political thing.

scribblerg
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@Sun – It’s even worse than that. He thinks we need his advice and coaching on whoring and that he’s “gaming” his whores, lol. What’s to learn? How to use an ATM? How to talk tough to a whore? Lol, I think most of us can handle that without any advice. And many of us have some experience in this dept. Fyi, one point though. I have had some paid encounters that were pretty nice and sexy. Once you know the girl and it’s comfortable, they can kind of get a little confused because of the sexual context. Also, if… Read more »

scribblerg
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@ASD – You present as though it’s a revelation that politics and religion intertwine when it came to the bloody religious wars of Europe as though that is some kind of insight, lol. Of course that’s true but it’s also true that the European wars of religion immediately following the onset of The Protestant Reformation were primarily about religion and conversion. I mean, you did study the wars of “The Holy Roman Empire” – or are you going to call those “sectarian political squabbles”? Here’s a nice wikipedia page on the Scottish Reformation and how that played out. Please, try… Read more »

Rocket
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@scribblerg “It’s even worse than that. He thinks we need his advice and coaching on whoring and that he’s “gaming” his whores, lol. What’s to learn? How to use an ATM?” Care to back that up with some quotes … from stuff I actually said ? Use the search and have at it. You got no quotes? Then you are a liar and full of shit. I never said I was “gaming” whores and actually said that what I was doing was not for everyone and specifically, that I’d given up seeing escorts. SBs are a different breed. Neither of… Read more »

kfg
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kfg
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“I’m for 1st amendment rights for citizens–not for persons.”

I am for 1st amendment rights for natural persons, who have inalienable rights whether they are citizens or not – not for legal persons, who are granted personhood by an act of law, not by natural right.

Citizenship is likewise a legal state, not a natural one, although some countries recognize the natural citizen as well. The United States of America is one of these (defined by the Constitution), Japan is not.

theasdgamer
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@ babbler_g

Circa 1938 – 1945 Catholic dictators such as Adolf Hitler

Adolf Hitler, creator of the Reich Church, a Catholic? Bwahahahaha!

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