Christian Dread

christian_dread

A couple of interesting things happened over the last week and a half that made me think it might be time to reconsider the principle of Dread once again. The first was a comment I made over at Biblical Gender Roles which Larry Solomon then devoted a blog post to address. This was my comment to him:

While I might not endorse overt Dread for Christian men I would advise they become more aware of the opportunities that passive Dread represents in their marriages.

Most Beta Christian men (which is to say 90%+) will proactively try to diffuse the sexual anxiety and tension necessary to inspire the ‘desired’ sex you describe here. They believe the pro-feminine lie that rapport, comfort and familiarity is what leads to sexual desire so they make every attempt to convince their wives that they have no need to worry or feel insecure that any other woman would want them sexually, much less appreciate them for being ‘good christian men’.

What they fail to grasp is that passionate sex inspired by genuine desire is the result of insecurity, anxiety and sexual tension. Most Christian men are conditioned to bypass this phase in seducing their wives, thinking that comfort and security are what will prompt her to being more sexual, but in doing so they kill the vibe before it can build. Comfort and rapport are post-orgasm, oxytocin effects, but Christian men believe they are prerequisites for sex. For the most part they are deathly afraid to embrace and exaggerate the uncertainty, spontaneity, anxiety and tension women need to feel sexual urgency.

You make sex another chore for a woman when you negotiate for her desire. Genuine desire cannot be negotiated. If you find yourself in a sexless (or passionless sex) relationship with your wife you need to embrace using soft dread situations to prompt her imagination. A woman’s imaginings are the best tool in you seduction toolbox, learn how to inspire them.

Make your wife unintentionally uncomfortable. Sexuality is spontaneous chemical reaction between two parties, not a process of negotiation. By its very nature passionate, desired sex is a result of being uncomfortable, uncertain and urgent. It might be an uncomfortable truth to most Christian men, but the best, most memorable, married sex you have won’t be the result of a pre-planned “Date Night” where you stage manage every event and nuance in advance; it will be the rough, hard-core, make-up sex you never thought you’d have after a near breakup inspired by the anxiety of the thought of never having you around anymore.

Just to give you a quick run down here, I found BGR quite by accident. One of Solomon’s post actually got shared in my FaceBook feed by a notorious Christian feminist I follow just for such stories. I’ve written about it in the past, but I find contemporary evangelical Christianity (or ‘Churchianity’) to be one of the most fertile grounds for egalitarian feminist mores to propagate.

Standard disclaimer: I don’t do religion on this blog, but I do intersexual dynamics and sometimes these have effects that are very intertwined with religion, politics and social orders. It’s long been my own and Dalrock’s observation that Christianity has been co-opted by the same feminization that secular society has been saturated by.

As things progressed, this post and my exchanges with Solomon in the comments were picked up on by Raw Story and at least 4 other reblogs from various culture news “journalists” happy to pull anything and everything out of context, provided no links to the actual article and, as would be expected, deleted any post of my own from the Disqus comment threads I vainly tried to leave. I was happy for what spillover traffic came in from it, but I know the indignation crowd’s flavor of the minute doesn’t really count for much.

However, for all of that, I did reexamine my two previous posts on Dread: Dread Games and Soft Dread. It was interesting to see the knee-jerk response to ideas like “passionate sex inspired by genuine desire is the result of insecurity, anxiety and sexual tension”  from the Blue Pill commentariat. The problem I see is that there’s only one manner in which terms like ‘insecurity’, ‘anxiety’ and ‘sexual tension’ are really interpreted by those steeped in the Feminine Imperative. They are always going to be viewed from a position of absolutism; therefor the drive-by impression is that myself or Solomon were advocating for heavy handed abuse of wives by their husbands.

And as expected, the straw men got more blown out of scale, and then it was a story of how Christian husbands ought to force themselves on their wives irrespective of their actual desire, and then comes ‘Rape! Rapety rape rape!’

How to Get Your Wife to Want to Fuck You

I’ll admit, I’m not familiar with Solomon’s writing, but from what I gather on his blog it’s fairly heavy on the “how to get your wife to have the Biblically mandated sex the Lord obligates her to” posts. I fully understand the ease with which the “spiritual, but not religious” crowd would have a field day with a majority of his posts.

As some of my readers are aware I’ve been an active reader of Dalrock’s blog for years now. I don’t do religion, but if I were to I expect a lot of what I’d write would be better done by Dal. A handful of commenters on his blog think I’m the Devil for laying bare the frustrations they observe in the church in the secular, nuts & bolts, psychology and intersexual dynamics. I think most there have a pretty good grasp of the feminization and egalitarian efforts that have taken root in a religion that still preaches the old set of books to men while simultaneously expecting them to recognize the new set of books for women.

I imagine a lot of contemporary Christian men would embrace some degree of the MGTOW mindset if marriage weren’t the only doctrinal means for them to have ‘ordained’ sex. Mainstream, pop-culture Christianity loves to adopt and ‘sanctify’ christianized versions of secular social trends, and the Red Pill is no exception. One theme I see repeated on sites like BGR as well as Focus on the Family is a push for married Christian couples to have more sex. Solomon’s tact is literally enforcing Biblical gender roles on couples and therefor obligating wives to ‘Duty Sex’ they apparently are reluctant to have. For the Focus on the Family side, there’s an embrace of men’s constant need to qualify themselves for their wive’s intimacy; ergo making it their fault for their sexlessness.

I imagine this situation doesn’t bode well with the contemporary Christian young man who actually takes his conviction with some degree of seriousness. Not only does his Burden of Performance include a constant qualification to women in a sexless pre-marriage state (to say nothing of the hormones of youth), he “struggles” with rubbing it out to porn, and then has a sexless marriage waiting for him on the other side of the marriage contract that is all down-side risk for him.

The Quest for the Righteous Fox will always persist, but I can’t say that sounds like a great opportunity for an 18 year old guy raised on Purity Rings and taught to defer all authority to the woman who will become his only source of sexual release for a lifetime. So the appeal of a christianized form of the Red Pill should be obvious.

My comment to Solomon was motivated from the perspective of wanting to help these men better understand their Christian conditioned Blue Pill predicament. I know a common refrain of more traditionalist Christians is that Christianity was already Red Pill before there was a Red Pill, and in an Old Testament respect I guess I can relate, but the problem isn’t one of doctrine, it’s about the readiness with which the church has adopted egalitarianism as doctrine. I get that it’s largely a business decision – appeal to the feminine or go out of business – but after several generations the same Blue Pill conditioning of the past 60+ years is only amplified in a religious context.

Religion is no insulation against Hypergamy. I understand that in the past religion was used as a control on Hypergamy, especially in respect to men’s burden of performance and the necessity of their provisioning to women.

There was a section in the London Real video interview of Nick Krauser where he explains the distribution of labor aspect of how religion and the 80\20 aspect of the Pareto Principle interact with Hypergamy and intersexual dynamics. I may explore this in another post, but the idea is that monogamous marriage in a Christian sense relatively ensured that the 80% Beta men could reasonably expect to get a woman for exclusive sex and pass on his genetic lineage.

Alpha Fucks and Beta Bucks are still the order of the day, but that Beta could, through a social and religious contract, be pacified with a wife and the responsibilities inherent in his burden of performance as a father and husband. Thus the distribution of labor could be maintained without the fear of a ‘Beta Uprising’ to claim control of more Alpha dominant men.

Stay at Home Dad Documents His Sex Life on a Fitbit

Unfortunately with the advent of the sexual revolution that Beta Christian man’s sex life is far more likely to resemble this guy’s. Egalitarianism has saturated itself not just into the social structure of the church, but it has reshaped the very doctrine upon which this old set of books and monogamous marriage was founded upon.

Thus we see men looking for answers to their sexless marriages and the hope that Red Pill awareness can bring to them. Old order marriage only exists with regards to men’s responsibilities under it. These husbands must balance those old order expectations with a new order egalitarianism that the church has embraced for their wives. And few are ever aware of their balancing act.

The Red Pill would have to be made Christian Kosher®, but the psychological and sociological underpinning of Red Pill awareness clashes with the ‘traditionalism’ of old order Biblical gender roles based on that old division of labor/monogamous marriage model.

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Rollo,

A guy with a high credit score should know better than to risk everything on a woman anyway.

Most don’t though.

My wife came with no debt, in fact, we raided her savings to pay off some of my debt after we married, lol.

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

I know.

He’s a great boss. Sometimes he will actually AMOG himself to me. Not sure what to do about that. Should I put myself down?

On the bright side the CEX’s know I’m next up.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Andy, Tread carefully, he likely has more clout than you realize. What do you mean he amog’s you? See’s you as a threat to him? I had a boss one time that was a great guy to work for, but I was way better at the job than he was. He saw me as a threat, and tried to subtly undermine me and throw his weight around. So I befriended him outside of work. Its amazing how buying someone a beer works to mend relations. Then I supported him in his work. We ran good numbers, made our bonuses, industry… Read more »

lh
lh
5 years ago

“in fact, we raided her savings to pay off some of my debt after we married, lol.”

Way to go, Alpha.

Pedat Ebediyah
5 years ago

@Rollo One of the tragedies of Christian guys’ Blue Pill conditioning is that they’re trained to believe that virtue, conviction, faith, temperance, forgiveness, etc. is what their potential wive will respond to sexually. And you know this, Rollo! Not only that, I can tell you first hand that not only do Christian women not respond to it sexually, they actually find contempt in that shit in the low, or “for-real, for-real” as my daughter would say. Our virtue, conviction, faith…etc…means nothing to them if such cannot be leveraged to their direct benefit.  Heaven forbid we have the gall to expect them to… Read more »

keyser Soze
keyser Soze
5 years ago

Emily the definition of stupidity, “” We place high value on celibacy, including and perhaps especially male celibacy”” Emily, It’s an insult to monkeys intelligence to call you a monkey. By placing celibacy on male not female doesn’t give you an excuse to forgive your past nymph. You have the intelligence of a 7 y.o. “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter. ” Winston Churchill. And I’d add : the best argument against a comment section is a 1 minute with a moron like Emily. I bet you, in your real life NO BODY… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“I bet you, in your real life NO BODY pay attention to your immature stupid opinion.”

Only until they nut.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Odd field report… Went to dinner with a female friend of mine. Made her pay. Anyway, she tried to rip into me and tell me how I am, “an arrogant ass” and that I am lucky she is still friends with me even though I am like that. I was laughing so hard I couldn’t really say anything. Then she proceeds to compliment my looks, tells me I am better off without “that bitch” of a wife, and named two of her friends she thinks I should fuck. Then she tried to get me to go on an overnight trip… Read more »

lh
lh
5 years ago

“Chicks are weird.”

Not once you understand how solipsism works: If you get her to make a sacrifice for you, her solipsism will make her think: “he must be worth it since I made the sacrifice for him”.

newlyaloof
5 years ago

@ Cave / YaReally, Cave, that “friend” appears to want to get you into a “it just happened” situation on that trip. lol. YaReally, went to lunch at one of my spots. Girl I know waited on me. She’s a lesbian but normally talkative, but not today. Asked her how she was doing. Got the “fine” answer and not much else. Remembered what you said so I asked her, “So, what did you dress up as for Halloween?” She brighten right up and talked about how excited she was to dress up but then something happened and she couldn’t, but… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Substitute “how are you?” with “what’s new and exciting in your life?”

She if she qualifies herself.

Just be prepared for the return of the same question to you.

“World domination, the usual”

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“Fine” is girl code for “I need a beta girlfriend to ask me what is wrong!”

Or,

“I’ve been asked that by 57 betas already today!”

Who gives a fuck how she is.

newlyaloof
5 years ago

@Cave, I know what you mean. To be more specific, I always say “what’s new” when I ask girls how they are doing, but I’ll add the “and exciting” part from now on. Point being, the sparked up at the dressing up comment, just as YaR said they would.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

I ask, “Have you been good?”

If they say “yes”, I reply, “How boring!”

If they say “no”, I reply, “Sounds like you’ve been having fun.”

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@Pedat Ebediyah Ice Cube is MY motivational speaker. Women have a much different take on ” religion ” or even God. Many chicks that I’ve met in life cannot wrap their heads around spirituality at all. Any manner of abstract thought appears to escape them. They can only relate to Te Feeeellzzzz, and that emotional buzz is fleeting for them. Once the Thrill is gone, they will either go into a religious ” routine ” or become a zealot-like nut who sees fit to bend the godliness of men to fit her ( hypergamous ) whims…. I’m looking at you… Read more »

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

“Has options = is attractive. That’s it.” They are giving some dude posting as MAX a real run for his money. I sincerely hope he is more troll than legit… I recognize a lot of his thinking in my old thoughts, and he’s still deep in the blue. How exactly does a man come to know he has “options” if he never tried them out? Meaning, how exactly would a man know he is “attractive” if he’s never successfully closed the deal with a few women? I know that by RP standards its “make it til you fake it” and… Read more »

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@ ted Meh, I can tell if a broad is into me. She wants to isolate with me. Wants to hold my hand. Leans her boob against my escort arm. Chats me up. Touches me a lot. I’ve been down this road a few times to where I dropped panties. Closed the deal two or three times. I can predict women’s behavior pretty accurately. I’d say, see if you can accurately predict women’s behavior as a test of his knowledge of women. For me, I’d have to game my own inhibitions to close the deal with anyone other than Mrs.… Read more »

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

ASD – you can tell NOW. But, can you honestly say you’ve known it all along? Looking back, I missed a metric shit ton of female interest simply because I had NO IDEA that a woman wanting to be alone with me was a sign she was interested. (and in fact my old self would have considered it cad-like to try and convert that alone time into something) Total truth: I chalked most of that up to “she’s just being friendly” because I was led to believe women “weren’t like that” with men. Thinking back to when I was 16?… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“Looking back, I missed a metric shit ton of female interest simply because I had NO IDEA that a woman wanting to be alone with me was a sign she was interested.” When I was 16… In a car with a chick. Hot, big boobs, slutty. Had me and a buddy of mine in the car with her. She said, “Its hot in here” Me, “Take off your shirt and cool down” She did. Drove around topless. Holy shit. Her, “Lets take [buddy] home” So she drove him to his house. Just her and I in the car… Me, “I… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

In all honesty, I knew what she wanted, but I was afraid of what Jesus would think.

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

“In all honesty, I knew what she wanted, but I was afraid of what Jesus would think.” Oh I had plenty of that going on too. I fell into a LTR just before my 16th birthday. It lasted 4 years lol. Mostly because at the time I felt like I’d won the lottery just meeting a girl that wanted to hang out let alone have sex with me. Not saying she was shitty, just that from that day on I completely stopped even looking. I went about 7 months after that crashed and met a friend of a friend, clicked… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

Re: saying hi to hoes..er…women, Relax your voice when speaking to them always. Drop your tone by a few octaves. Personally, I love fucking with chicks personal space. I’m a bonafide space invader. 11/5/2015 I stopped into car dealership to schedule an oil change for tomorrow morning. The chick at the counter was not there and had to be paged. ” Mara to the courtesy counter please..”. She approached and said ” can I help you?’, so I said, all in one non-stop sentence ” Hey Mara, look, I want an oil change for tomorrow, preferably before noon and here’s… Read more »

kfg
kfg
5 years ago

“Relax your voice when speaking to them always. Drop your tone by a few octaves.”

Ding!Ding!Ding!Ding!Ding! We haaaaave a winner!

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@teddj4g, I always preferred being in a relationship. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. I’d try to maintain a relationship, and when it went south I’d just go on a pussy binge. After my last marriage imploded, I boned a dozen broads. My nuts were emptied, but I still preferred a ” real ” relationship. I can actually maintain a high level of attraction for my mate in an LTR or marriage. must be a genetic defect or something. Every day I molest my wife because she turns me on. I used to think ” women aren’t like that “,… Read more »

theasdgamer
5 years ago

“Relax your voice when speaking to them always. Drop your tone by a few octaves”

A variance of tone is more interesting to the opposite sex. Shrink the distance and laser and say, “Hi there.” Then smile. You want to convey that you own her.

lh
lh
5 years ago

“Women/girls can teach a man some valuable lessons if the mindset is right. Women/girls will destroy you if the mindset is incorrect.

There’s always time.”

Wise words indeed.

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@theasdgamer ” A variance of tone is more interesting to the opposite sex. Shrink the distance and laser and say, “Hi there.” Then smile. You want to convey that you own her.” True, but make sure the variance tends towards the lower octaves, always. I tend not to smile right away. I like to give the slightest impression that a) I’m not impressed by her presence, and b) I’m judging her. But in a friendly way. Lol. Shrink the distance. 100% agree. It may spook some girls but it’s a sure fire way to disqualify some. Many of these broads… Read more »

Anonymous Reder
Anonymous Reder
5 years ago

One test of Blaximus’s observation about vocal pitch is easy: just watch the average hipster dude uptalking at a coffee joint. He’s trying to chat up some woman in yoga pants? Who’s waiting in line for her latte’? And her entire body language is … what? Oh, never mind, she’s leaving. Uptalking in young women is silly, in women over 30 it’s annoying, in men it’s just ridiculous. A lower pitched man’s voice conveys a lot of messages, all of them masculine. Anecdote: I’ve given presentations when I was sick with a lot of congestion and my voice was lower… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@teddj4g ” How exactly does a man come to know he has “options” if he never tried them out? Meaning, how exactly would a man know he is “attractive” if he’s never successfully closed the deal with a few women? I know that by RP standards its “make it til you fake it” and all, but realistically that isn’t much of an option for most men. So they are expecting an AFC to just “get it” that he is attractive, despite having little to no real evidence to support it. Fried ice indeed!” I feel like posting up tonight. I… Read more »

Blaximus
Blaximus
5 years ago

@Anonymous Reder ( reder??? ) ” Uptalking in young women is silly, in women over 30 it’s annoying, in men it’s just ridiculous. A lower pitched man’s voice conveys a lot of messages, all of them masculine. Anecdote: I’ve given presentations when I was sick with a lot of congestion and my voice was lower than usual, and the attention level was clearly higher especially among the women. I’ve also attended presentations where older men who clearly were low-T talked in high tenor voices and the restlessness was palpable.” Cosign to infinity. A fwb I had once told me that… Read more »

enrique
enrique
5 years ago

Blaximus, I assume you are locked in on brother Tommy Sotomayor. He, Dalrock, Rollo, and Barbarossa are like the Four Horseman of Red Pillian/MGTOWian revelation. Along the lines of this post of Rollo’s, Tommy never misses a chance to knock black women, noting how all these “hyper Christian” black women criticize gay men for being gay (going to hell, etc), and yet are unmarriage and towing 3-4 kids behind them from 3-4 different men. You can bet their “we black folk so religious” pastors are totally cool with it too. Hypergamy completely owns the black community–the FI is as strong… Read more »

Anonymous Reader
Anonymous Reader
5 years ago

Blaximus: Another Anecdote : My ex wife. I overheard her ( eavesdropping like a motherfucker ) confiding in a friend a few months prior to our divorce, something along the lines of ” it used to be when I heard his voice, I tingled ( she said tingled, I remember that much 100% ). Now that’s going away..” This was 16 years into our marriage. When I devolved into BP land, I believe I even spoke differently. Hah, she actually said tingled? Nothing like confirmation, eh? Totally cosign the different speech patterns and inflections that the BP brings on. Listen… Read more »

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
5 years ago

@Rollo Tommassi http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2015/11/04/raising-kids-and-running-a-household-how-working-parents-share-the-load/?utm_source=Pew+Research+Center&utm_campaign=10d57ccb52-Weekly_Nov_5_201511_5_2015&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_3e953b9b70-10d57ccb52-400076649 @lh “Look at Abraham: What a spineless weakling going to sacrifice his son because some God wanted him to. I mean what else could one answer to such a request but “Fuck you, from my dead cold hands only!” And I bet Odysseus and many other ancient heroes would agree.” Story of my life “But in truth the Alphas I know all started their own business to be their own boss or they didn’t join the race for money at all.” Thats incredibly important for a red pill healthy life. Everyone I’ve ever enjoyed being around built… Read more »

skatterbrainzz
5 years ago

Soooo glad I found your blog. Thank you! As for this particular post/comment-thread: from a guy married 27 years, I agree that spontaneity should be obvious, and anyone who really believes in the “date-night” concept is an idiot (or asexual). On the aspects of church and feminist/feminine overture, I would concur. Many modern protestant churches are commonly filled with women dressed to impress. Accentuating their physical aspects in ways that violate (or rub against, pardon the pun) Timothy (first chapters) and Corinthians, YET – if a male were to bring that dichotomy into a conversation, it would be like yelling… Read more »

Liz
Liz
5 years ago

I used to kid and say I was going to invent something you could speak into (like, a teddy bear or some other innocuous looking thing) and it would turn the voice into a deep male sounding voice so the kids would listen and not tune the mom voice out. I told this to someone at a dinner and apparently they did a psych study in a metro on that one. According to the guy I was talking to they experimented with the way crowds respond to voice, and they put a man in the middle of the crowd and… Read more »

Dutchman
Dutchman
5 years ago

Wouldn’t putting your credit score on a dating website be a massive DLV?

“Hey look at how ready I am to be your beta provider! I’ve been preparing for it for years! Is it my turn yet?”

Roused
Roused
5 years ago

@Rugby “Damn Rollo I’m getting a hell of a lot better and yet I regress when it apples to the world at large.” I hear ya bro. I lost it yesterday at work and wanted to fire everybody for their lazy, stupid dysfunctional incompetence. Had no patience and let my “work” Frame slip. But then I kicked in what I’m good at and after verbally bitch slapping a few people calmly (voice) walked them through how to solve some big problems. Got good feed back and thank you from the people I yelled at. This came after I lost Frame… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Hey, thanks Roused. You have the right attitude. I can tell.

I don’t post on many blogs. But when I do I prefer to be maddening, bold, repetitious, judgmental, intemperate, erudite, reductive, shrewd, self-indulgent, self-congratulatory, provocative, pompous, penetrating, perspicacious and pretentious.

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

What do you mean he amog’s you? See’s you as a threat to him?

@Cave

No, I mean he’ll say something self-deprecating and then props me up in front of important people. He’s just not an Alpha type of boss. We travel together a lot and we get along well outside of work. I guess when he does that I should just complement him as well.

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

@ Andy and Roused, Rollo likes to have men he’s helping through triage read Robert Greene’s “48 Laws of Power” If judging a book by its cover makes you a bit reluctant to indulge in power for power’s sake, read the introduction of that book carefully. Mostly it speaks to understanding that an amoral stance can be used, just like Game should be employed in an amoral fashion. The book is a bit long on tales of older times and anecdotes. It is short on “how to” actually apply each law in-real-life. I find this link the most concise list… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

You can get the concise version of the 48 laws. Still doesn’t have any modern day examples, but it isn’t a tomb to carry around either.

Greene’s “The Art of Seduction” should be required reading as well.

“If you are trying to destroy an enemy who has hurt you, far better to keep him off-guard by feigning friendliness than showing your anger.”

Love it.

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
5 years ago
Reply to  CaveClown

@Roused “Gotta hop in the shower and go nail my GF before work, give her some Game/Frame of what I want to continue becoming, a fearless man that walks tall with confidence knowing what I want, not what I used to be.” Seems as if your building a hell of a good start. I tip my hat to you. https://m.soundcloud.com/pow-lean/come-pick-me-up-ryan-adams @SJF “Never waste valuable time, or mental peace of mind, on the affairs of others—that is too high a price to pay.” Thank you for helping me with this. “If the game of power is inescapable, better to be an… Read more »

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

In all honesty, at this stage of life, if given a choice of fucking an unlimited supply of 20-somethings, or having a real relationship on my terms, I’m picking the relationship every time. @Blaximus I wish I felt like that. I was a serial monogamist. I don’t think I was single for more than 6 months total from 18yrs old on. I’ve always been the AMOG with my friends. I’d get single and some social circle chick would throw herself at me. I never had the self respect to turn down the relationship. My wife was the only one I… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“But I kept coming across the same problem. They would start talking business, which is okay, I don’t mind. That would lead to them asking me some sort of semi-technical question. I would start answering their question and they immediately lose interest and look like they want to die.” Answer with feelz, not logic. “Can you keep a secret? They only hired me because I’m so good looking, I actually have no idea how any of this stuff works. So far, I’ve been able to fake it” Then put your finger up to your lips and quietly say, “shhhh” for… Read more »

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

@Cave

Genius. Thx.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Unless there is a specific reason for me to do so (like a biz deal), I try never answer a woman’s question with an actual answer.

Bank teller yesterday;

Her, “You still lifting? Your chest is a lot bigger than last time”

Me, “Nah, I was born jacked” (h/t cupid schmupid)

giggles

Her, “Do you still run too?”

Me, “I do a lot of 5k’s, but I only go to give the girls something to look at”

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“Genius. Thx.”

Yes it is genius, lol.

In a big mixer like that you just created a little bubble of only you and her.

Instant rapport, but also tingles if you are charming enough. Its a bit on the self-deprecating side, so make sure it is obvious that you really are a master at the subject you are discussing.

I did almost this exact thing with a female lawyer at a big conference table of people. She wants me.

Stingray
5 years ago

I don’t understand why they ask the question if they don’t want to hear the answer.

They are trying to strike up a conversation with you. They don’t want to talk business, but it’s the only way they know how to start one. They aren’t looking for information, they are looking for an in. When you give them a technical answer back, you’ve basically shut the door in their face (as they see it). Keep the door open by doing what Cave Clown said. For them it’s not about business even though they talk that way.

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

“Unless there is a specific reason for me to do so (like a biz deal)”

That makes sense. Looking back I think the only reason they started talking business is because they were talking about themselves, their career, etc. I was thinking they were actually interested in their job. lol. On the bright side I think must have good sub-communications or something. I was getting IOI’s from all of em, and a cute 25 year old couldn’t look away from my eyes and had ridiculous pupil dilation.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“the only reason they started talking business is because they were talking about themselves, their career”

And they are at a function where they are SUPPOSED to talk about that stuff, right?

Exactly.

Every other guy there will be talking business. All of them.

Think she got all dolled up to talk tech????

Law 6, Law 28, & Law 32.

benfromtexas
benfromtexas
5 years ago
Reply to  CaveClown

Yep. Women don’t get dolled up to do business. They get dolled up to hunt for DNA donors.

trackback

[…] discussion about it in other Christian and secular blogs. Specifically, Biblical Gender Roles and Rollo. In my opinion, the whole issue is a bit more nuanced than both Rollo and BGR argue back and forth. […]

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

“Every other guy there will be talking business. All of them.”

Yeah, just thinking out loud here. I think the cute 25 yr old being into me got the 30 somethings jealous which was driving the IOI’s from them. At one point she was talking to a group of 6 people but didn’t break eye contact with me the whole time. As soon as she left they were trashing her pretty hard.

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

CaveClown – “I was a serial monogamist. I don’t think I was single for more than 6 months total from 18yrs old on. I’ve always been the AMOG with my friends. I’d get single and some social circle chick would throw herself at me. I never had the self respect to turn down the relationship. My wife was the only one I gamed. Looking back I did a surprisingly good job at it. Probably because I didn’t want a relationship. Notice how that turned out for me? lol” That’s a fair description of my teens and 20’s too lol. (AMOG… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Ted, that was Andy, not me. Although I could of wrote that too, lol.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Longest I’ve ever been without a live-in woman is when the wife and I were separated the first time, so about a year.

Happiest I ever have been, lol.

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

Lol we are all messing up who we reply to this week. Full moon coming?

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“I’m not trying to game them because right now I’m still working on basic social skills. Anyway, the conversations were going really well. But I kept coming across the same problem. They would start talking business, which is okay, I don’t mind. That would lead to them asking me some sort of semi-technical question. I would start answering their question and they immediately lose interest and look like they want to die. lol. I don’t understand why they ask the question if they don’t want to hear the answer. Any suggestions?” The girls don’t want a technical explanation. Sure, they… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Anyone figure out this chick’s angle for me? Bank teller supervisor chick. H67, 32 yr old. I had been coming into this bank for quite some time and teasing/flirting with an HB7, 24 yr old bank teller that worked for supervisor chick. Had teller chick giving me hugs and such. Teller chick told me one day she was quitting the bank, so I said, “Now who am I supposed to tease around here?” Supervisor, “You can tease me! Or our new girl [name]” I don’t recall my response, but I’m sure it was charming. Supervisor chick now makes it a… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“H67, 32 yr old.”

Should be HB6

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

“Why would she keep talking about the younger girl?”

Serious question Cave? What?

Sounds like simple prior preselection and the supervisor is lonely and bored at work. Supervisor is showing indications of interest towards you.

Stingray
5 years ago

Why would she keep talking about the younger girl?

What SJF said, plus it’s a Sh*t test. You passed with, “I told her not to fall in love with me, but she didn’t listen” or any variation of not overtly validating the older bank supervisor. She’s fishing for interest towards herself.

If you gave her very covert validation, you’d make her day and she would take it as interest on your part.

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

CC – probably what SJF said. She’s feeling you out to see if she has a shot, or is bored and likes your style of banter.

Unless you plan to bang her, its probably irrelevant to you anyway…

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Hey! Nothing in regards to game is irrelevant.

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

I’ll even go out on a limb and assume you don’t intend to bang her. Otherwise you’d have jumped at that opening lol.

Isnt that the crux of frame? If she’s talking to you outside of what’s required, assume its interest, because you are the shit!

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“Unless you plan to bang her, its probably irrelevant to you anyway…” Oh no, would not bang. Good buddy of mine is the bank VP. Not gonna pull from his backyard. It’s my main bank where I keep most my funds and all my financing. (which is probably another reason why supervisor chick likes me…money) That is why I didn’t escalate with the girl that quit, even when she hinted at giving me her number. But it is relevant for the experience. (plus, these girls end up asking my wife about me when she goes in there, which makes me… Read more »

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

SJF – I meant the reason she is chatting about younger woman is irrelevant. By all means use her for practice. But why worry about her intentions?

Stingray
5 years ago

I asked about the necklace hanging between her tits, does that count towards validation for her?

The very best kind for you. That’s hamster food, right there.

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

@ Rollo Why not both? Hey now. That would require both motive and opportunity. Wouldn’t it? I can handle one. Barely. But then again, that’s why we’re here, isn’t it? Assuming a man didn’t settle in the choice of woman for a LTR: How many women you have sex with is your business. Before you consider more than one, however, it is best to prove your capacity with one. If you can’t handle one—if deep communion easy pussy, rejuvenating passion real desire sex, and spiritual happiness real power (the degree to which a man has control over the circumstances and… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

@ Tedd I meant the reason she is chatting about younger woman is irrelevant. By all means use her for practice. But why worry about her intentions? Sure. I presumed she was “invisible” to Cave, being only a HB6 instead of a HB7+. Reiterating from the Preface of 48 Laws, as mentioned above: “Power is essentially amoral and one of the most important skills to acquire is the ability to see circumstances rather than good or evil. Power is a game—this cannot be repeated too often—and in games you do not judge your opponents by their intentions but by the… Read more »

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Hell, that brings us back to Christian Dread.

“What does it matter if THE CHURCH intended good things and had only your interests at heart, if the effects of his action lead to so much ruin and confusion? “

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Sorry, my ingested caffeine is peaking and so is my pressure of speech. I’m going to head to the gym and lift some weights.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

An HB6 is still very much on this thirsty guys radar, unfortunately.

Although it would seem by her reactions that I hide it well.

kobayashii1681
5 years ago

@Rollo: “Why not both?”

Exactly…

theasdgamer
5 years ago

SJF…the most interesting commenter in the world.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@ Cave

An HB6 is still very much on this thirsty guys radar, unfortunately

She’s on mine, too, if she’s very feminine, like a Brazilian broad I danced with last Sat. night. Dolled up in a white minidress. Face was HB6 and body was HB8. A Betterthanbutterface.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@ Cave

She keeps bringing up the younger girl that quit.

“Our girl [teller chick] is doing well at her new job”

“[teller chick] asked about you”

“I’ll keep you posted on how [teller chick] is doing, I know you are curious”

“Are you sad that [teller chick] left us?”

The super is throwing the teller chick at you because the teller chick is interested.

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Ahh. I’m an enthusiast.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@ Cave

Good buddy of mine is the bank VP. Not gonna pull from his backyard.

The teller chick quit, right?

SJF
SJF
5 years ago

Asdgamer, I actually purloined all those adjectives @8:15 AM from a review of Nassim Taleb’s book “Antifragile: Things that gain from disorder” by The New York Times.

It is a spectacularly good book incorporating red pill type of themes including Stoicism. I heard it mentioned both by Tyler Durden and Julien in regards to Game in videos posted here over the past week.

I highly recommend that book in a man’s library of red pill awareness and game reading material.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“The super is throwing the teller chick at you because the teller chick is interested.”

Oh, I know the teller chick wants to have my babies.

I knew teller chick’s mom from a long time ago, and used to flirt with her like crazy. In fact, I helped get teller chick and teller chick’s brother their first jobs as young teens because her mom asked me to recommend them.

So I have some “mom pre-selection” going on, lol.

Plus teller chick knows this stripper that I used to know really well. (long story)

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“The teller chick quit, right?”

Yes…

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Teller chick took a job with law enforcement. (why on earth a 5’3″ 100lb very feminine chick did that is beyond me)

She told me I need to get arrested so I can come see her, because she didn’t want to lose touch again.

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
5 years ago

@CaveClown

She told me I need to get arrested so I can come see her, because she didn’t want to lose touch again.

“Sweetheart, I’m not gonna be the one in handcuffs next time we see each other.”

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

CaveClown – “She told me I need to get arrested so I can come see her, because she didn’t want to lose touch again.”

Tell her to show up in the uniform with her cuffs, and you’ll do something she should arrest you for! Add in you want swift justice and harsh punishment. :-p

IAS
IAS
5 years ago

About the Catholic Church being BP or RP, this is food for thought for any New Testament (Christian) faith.

Mary gets pregnant. Joseph marries her even though the kid isn’t his. Joseph is a Saint, for being cuckolded by God. God must have Godly SMV so Mary has to be an Alpha Widow, leaving me to wonder how epic were the Shit Tests that Joseph got to put up with…

benfromtexas
benfromtexas
5 years ago
Reply to  Rollo Tomassi

Another good point.

benfromtexas
benfromtexas
5 years ago
Reply to  IAS

That’s genius.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

Surprisingly, InsanityBytes and I are in startling agreement at my post: https://theasdgamer.wordpress.com/2015/11/05/shes-cheating-yet-he-disgusts-her/

Mark the calendar. I think I just saw a pig with wings out my second story window.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Ted & Sun,

lol

I know, all the things I should of said!

Oh well, live and learn I guess.

Back in the day (like 6 months ago) I wouldn’t of even realized she was interested.

3 months ago I would of realized, but thought that she wouldn’t be interested if she “actually knew me”.

Today I’m kicking myself for not escalating and for cockblocking myself by being married.

Small town though, I’ll see her again.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“Mary gets pregnant. Joseph marries her even though the kid isn’t his. Joseph is a Saint, for being cuckolded by God.”

they cut out the part where Joseph realizes Jesus looks like the neighbor…

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@ Rollo Mary gets held up as the ‘Mother of God’ right up to the resurrection, but Joseph fades right after the Christmas story. Yet another reason Christianity is tailor made for thematic interpretations of female empowerment. Then there’s the antithesis in Luke 11: Some FI broad: “Blessed is the womb that bore You and the breasts that gave you suck.” Jesus: “On the contrary, blessed are those who hear the word of God and observe it.” And Jesus dissed his mother at the wedding at Cana. And kept her worrying about her future until he told her to stay… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

“Mary gave birth to CHRIST without having known a man’s touch, that’s true. But she did have a husband. And do you really think he’d have stayed married to her all those years if he wasn’t getting laid? The nature of God and the Virgin birth, those are leaps of faith. But to believe a married couple never got down? Well, that’s just plain gullibility.”

– Rufus, the 13th Apostle.

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

“– Rufus, the 13th Apostle.”

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

CaveClown – “Today I’m kicking myself for not escalating and for cockblocking myself by being married.”

You know my stand on monogamy and marriage, but I have to point out: being married is only a cock block if you allow it to be. Of course I personally DO allow it to stop me, but I thought about it and decided. Have you? If so all good. But have you given it thought? Some of what you’ve written makes me wonder, so I’ll be the dick that says it.

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Ted,

I see other women, I’m just not very good at it yet.

3 new girls this year

teddj4g
teddj4g
5 years ago

In that case, drop the marriage cock block thinking entirely. Just say you didn’t escalate and move on. No excuses brother!

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Of course, it’s all on the DL.

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@ Rollo

Christianity may not be all-in on the FI, but the FI is all-in on Christianity. Those are the themes feminism builds a Christian platform with.

Agreed. (Lots of ideologies have attempted to piggyback on Christianity.) But some reading here will argue that Christianity is all in on the FI. They are seriously mistaken.

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

Here’s another fun one. Talking to cute 25 yr old, tells me how she was just promoted to sales. I tell her how I can’t stand salespeople, then tell her why… I go into a whole spiel about authenticity, tone of voice and congruence. Then she asks me, clearly horrified of sounding like a salesperson. “Do I talk like a salesperson?”

Whats a good response?

theasdgamer
5 years ago

@ Andy

Don’t say anything. [amused mastery smile]

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

I would of worded the spiel as teasing instead of condemning the girls profession. Know what I mean?

“You’re not gonna be like one of those pushy salesman that never leave me alone, are ya? Always calling, always wanting something…like a clingy ex girlfriend or the cable company?”

Her, “Of course not, blah blah blah”

“Good, cause I can’t handle anymore of that in my life”

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

@asd

haha, nice. I could pull that off.

“I would of worded the spiel as teasing instead of condemning the girls profession. Know what I mean?”
@Cave

You’re a salesperson aren’t you? lol

CaveClown
CaveClown
5 years ago

Everything is sales!

Andy
Andy
5 years ago

I don’t think we can be friends.

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