The Reckoning

DEAD-RECKONING-MAIN1520

As a man approaches the age of his sexual market peak potential there comes a shift in the order of priority of his position in sexual strategy advantage. Most men never actualize this. For the majority of men, that is to say the 80%+ of Beta men who’ve accommodated the female sexual strategy prior to realizing their SMV potential, this can be an aggravating period of their lives.

Often men are bound to financially and emotionally binding commitments to women well before that peak potential is realized. This is by design of course; a design with the intent of ensuring the long term security of women exiting the short-term sexual imperatives of their Party Years. The Feminine Imperative effects this via social engineering, but few men understand that they could ever have a greater SMV potential they might realize once they mature into it prior to making those commitments.

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On my SMV time line / graph there comes a pronounced shift in a man’s SMV potential just after a woman’s Epiphany Phase, and up to and after a man’s SMV peak potential age range. The social engineering aspect is effected in the form of uniquely male shame and the insisted responsibilities to fulfill women’s long-term sexual strategies. I loosely base the age range of this phase at or around 30 years of age.

I call this point of crossover the point of comparative SMV and the period between women and men’s SMV peaks the peak span years. In a generalized context, the most significant life changes men and women will experience occur within this 15-16 year span. For women, their SMV peak usually occurs at a time in which they have only begun to mature into an adult understanding of themselves. As women’s SMV peak potential is primarily based on her looks and sexual availability it’s interesting to consider the SMP power women wield at a point in their lives when they’ve just matured past their adolescence.

For men, the progression towards their peak potential years usually begins around the point at which women’s is peaking. A man’s maturation process, the experience and the time necessary to establish himself as an SMV optimized man roughly spans that 15-16 year peak span phase. A lot of critics of this graph (in an egalitarian mindset) presume that SMV for men is, or should be, the functional equivalent of women’s. What they fail to consider is how men’s inherent burden of performance factors into his overall SMV and the time, effort and personal investment necessary to maximize his personal potential.

It’s vitally important for men to keep that in mind when they consider the whole of men’s sexual market value. Largely, men must invest 10-16 years of that peak span phase to actualize his potential.

The NBER (National Bureau of Economic Research) published a study last year which outlined the reasons why most creative and innovative breakthroughs happen in (in this case a majority of men) our late 30’s:

The authors examined the high points of the careers of both great inventors and Nobel-Prize winning scientists, and they found that the late 30s were the sweet spot for strokes of genius:

 Jones/NBER

Innovators have been peaking slightly later in life as the 20th century has progressed, in part because today’s scientists have more to learn than their predecessors did:

Jones/NBER

What’s more, people who excel in abstract fields, like art or physics, tend to be younger than those who win prizes in fields that require more context, like history or medicine. Another 1977 study found that physics Nobel winners were 36 on average when they did their prize-winning work, while chemists were 39 and medical doctors were 41.

If these bell curves look eerily similar to the male SMV curve I introduced two years prior to them being published, it’s only because my experience in the manosphere led me to then what the researchers concluded:

So why the late 30s? The most obvious factor is education: Scientists spend ages 5 through 18 in school, and then ages 18 through 30ish getting their academic degrees. Then a few years of learning on the job, and presto! You dig up an uncertainty principle. Meanwhile, scientific breakthroughs tend to be less common in old age because we invest less in learning as we get older, and our skills gradually become less relevant.

It’s a pretty fascinating study if you have the time to read it.

If you remove the Nobel Prizes and innovative achievements out of the equation I think the rough outline of the bell curve is still generally reflective of most men’s peak potentials with regard to SMV.

Realized Potentials

In Mid-Life Crisis I offered that this contrived “crisis” really isn’t rooted in a man’s yearning for his younger days, but rather his coming to the realization that his SMV and peak potential put him into a state of awareness that he could actualize things he previously thought weren’t possible for him. For many men this is the first time in their lives that they really have the introspection to understand the harsh Red Pill truth.

They realize options they never knew they could have, and they realize they could exercise them in ways they never expected.

They come to understand that the life decisions they’d made 10-12 years ago were based on a fulfilling long-term female sexual strategies. Now they see how that path played out for them. Men find themselves in a position of having wasted that SMV peak potential by accepting the responsibilities he was convinced were his duty by the Feminine Imperative in his 20s, or he finds himself experiencing the boons of that SMV and unable to truly capitalize on them because of his commitments.

It’s important to mention that there is a stark contrast between a man’s mid-life awareness of his peak SMV potential and how women experience their own 10-15 years earlier. Men experience their SMV peak with the benefit of about 12 years of maturity to reflect on while women experience their peak without that benefit. There is no comparison to how men and women experience this peak.

After roughly 15 years of obeisance to the Feminine Imperative, and for the first time in their lives, men can experience a sexual market valuation above that of the women they committed themselves to. For the first time in a man’s life the Cardinal Rule of Relationships shifts to his (potential) advantage. For men who’ve experienced a nominally sexless marriage during that time, coming to the awareness that they’ve tolerated that state for so long and combined with a new realization of their SMV, men will deductively begin taking stock of their marriages.

Granted, a majority of men don’t maximize their personal potential and their wives’ SMV can still, at least perceptively so, out class their own. This is a particularly frustrating position for men without the Red Pill awareness necessary to understand the precariousness of it. These are the men who tend to rely on the fallacy of relational equity and the equalist hope that his wife can be expected to rationally appreciate the sacrifices he’s made of himself for her and their family’s benefit.

Resented Potentials

For women in either case there is a resentment for men entering their peak phase. With few notably exceptional outliers most women realize in earnest that their SMV is well below their husband’s or the potentially acceptable men they’d prefer to be intimate with during the same age range (35-38). On some level of awareness these women understand that their sexual marketability is, perhaps for the first time, at a disadvantage.

Feminine-operative social conventions shift radically during this time because the long-term security needs side of Hypergamy takes on a new urgency as women come to the reality that their own SMV has declined. At the Epiphany Phase the frantic realization that the past short-term sexual indiscretions Hypergamy made a priority for her are no longer (and never really were) a sustainable reality creates the necessity of men to forgive them.

The readied social conventions usually revolve around men’s social contract and commitments, but the old standby of shame is always useful. At no other point in a man’s life will he be humbled (humiliated) more than in the years leading up to his peak potential years. Again, this is by design. In the meta scope of women’s sexual strategy, women cannot afford a man becoming self-aware of his role in fulfilling her strategy.

This is an interesting paradox; optimally a woman would want a man to realize his maximal potential to ensure her long-term security, but she can’t have him fully understand the role he plays in serving her sexual strategy. Thus he must be humbled, if not outright ridiculed, in his social and professional victories. His confidence at this stage cuts both ways. While his confidence in his potential is attractive, women realize it’s also attractive to other women at a time when her SMV is on its decline in earnest and he’s beginning to become more aware of the game that’s been perpetrated on him during the 15 years he’s risen to that maturity.

Late Game Dread

Dread is always an effective Game principle, but the passive Dread that accompanies a man’s SMV peak years is particularly potent. I’ve explored passive or soft Dread in the past, but I think men in their peak years need to understand the effect that unsolicited social proof as a result of increased status and SMV has on women’s (wives’) Dread during this phase – particularly for women who’ve until then never experienced their LTR man in that context.

Red Pill savvy men understand that a woman’s imagination is the most potent tool in the Game toolbox, however, this peak phase has the potential to really emphasize those imaginings and can be played to a real advantage. Since a woman has more to lose on her long-term sexual strategy’s investments these imaginings can inspire an anxiety she’s never known. For a Beta man this is usually the point at which he will double down on his placating in order to allay his woman’s fears, which in turn only reemphasizes and verifies his Beta status to her.

(Implied) Experience Teaches Best

One final point here, I should add that at no other time in a man’s life will employing Amused Mastery be so effective:

Amused Mastery is particularly effective for older men / younger women Game. Assuming you’re in reasonably good shape and have some degree of affluence, being older gives you a degree of authenticity. With maturity comes an expectation of knowledge and experience for Men. I’ve used Amused Mastery with my “pour girls” at promo events and it’s like cat nip for them. You become that Father figure to them (FILF?) that they crave, but can’t seem to get from younger guys. There’s a certain Alpha security dynamic at play between a woman and a Man who emits an ambient vibe of having been with enough women to be able to predict her shit tests, and then pass them with a casual roll of his eyes and a knowing smirk. When a man is giving off the cues of Amused Mastery theres an unspoken presumption by women that he “just gets it” when it comes to dealing with women.

Amused Mastery is far more effective during a man’s SMV peak because women presume that the attitude is more legitimate since a man matures slower into his peak. They expect men to have the maturity and experience to actually be amused by a less experienced, less mature woman. An established man who’s made the most of his potential is presumed to have an attractive Frame into which a woman will want to become a part of.

Fem-centric society conditions men to humble themselves for fear that his confidence would be interpreted as cockiness and thus risk her rejection of him. Most (Beta) men are petrified to even experiment with Amused Mastery because they believe it would be interpreted as disrespect toward a woman, but the truth of it is counterintuitive to them. What they fail to consider is the associations women make with a man’s maturity:

The Associations of Maturity

First off,  it’s a mistake to just peg 40 y.o.s in this demographic. There are plenty of early to mid thirties guys that can and do pull girls 5 to 8 years younger than themselves regularly. Funny how there’s little shaming stigma with that age difference. It’s not a man’s physical age so much as what the age represents (or is perceived to) – maturity, accomplishment, better provisioning capacity, status, etc. Do ALL men actually realize these to their satisfaction by this time? Of course not, but it’s the perception that they SHOULD have actualized this that is the attractant in comparison to younger guys who haven’t, nor would really be expected to. Mature Men represent this perception of assumed accomplishment and security – exactly what women are looking for in a phase of life where their sexual marketability declines and their need for long term provisioning becomes more urgent..

 

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Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

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Atlanta Man
Atlanta Man
8 years ago

Another killer post, I love this site!

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[…] The Reckoning […]

Mad Yale Grad
Mad Yale Grad
8 years ago

“As women’s SMV peak potential is primarily based on her looks and sexual availability”

The more sexually available she is the higher her SMV or lower?

A few of the beta providers I know are high SMV in their local sexual markets with options to date younger, child free women but they fell in love with baby mamas. Can you explain that? Is “true love” really a thing?

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago

What are some great ways in dealing with being aware of the red pill and growing older while losing people along the way who no longer find your company meaningful? How do you truly rid your self of years of conditioning?

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

“How do you truly rid your self of years of conditioning?”

Years of self conditioning.

Not Born This Morning
8 years ago

@kfg April 24th, 2015 at 7:49 pm ” It just doesn’t make sense.” “Pretty little theory, but it will stand or fall on the empirical data, no matter how ugly.” You aren’t clear but I assume you intend “pretty little theory” to mean that I think this discussion should remain unspoiled by women commentators such as Dragonfly. I in fact do not. I welcome their involvement and believe it is crucial to maintain a truly open forum as intended. Perhaps you (like some others) assume my comments are designed to attack a person. They are not but I do intend… Read more »

D. Horrenbrand
8 years ago

Just perfect. I will enter 40s with vasectomy checked out, single and happy. Nature could not got this better! for those who thought it through before and did not allowed females to dictate how a male should live his own life. 🙂

Regards,
__
Datson H.
https://redmalehummingbird.wordpress.com/

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

“You aren’t clear . . .”

. . . about who my comment was addressed to. Mea culpa.

I was addressing the mad Yale hatter.

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

@NBTM: “I suspect she has a personal motive that she may not completely comprehend or ever divulge.”

I suspect I have identified it.

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

I also suspect that you have crossed threads.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Mad Yale Grad April 24th, 2015 at 7:06 pm “As women’s SMV peak potential is primarily based on her looks and sexual availability” “The more sexually available she is the higher her SMV or lower? A few of the beta providers I know are high SMV in their local sexual markets with options to date younger, child free women but they fell in love with baby mamas. Can you explain that? Is “true love” really a thing?” You are seeing but not reading the text properly. The sentence you first quoted reads “based on her looks” and moreso if she… Read more »

Not Born This Morning
8 years ago

Rollo-

Thanks for another absolutely great post your writing skills are excellent. All this should certainly help men to reach maturity in these respects more efficiently and with better tact.

Mad Yale Grad
Mad Yale Grad
8 years ago

sjfrellc April 24th, 2015 at 8:34 pm Mad Yale Grad April 24th, 2015 at 7:06 pm “As women’s SMV peak potential is primarily based on her looks and sexual availability” “The more sexually available she is the higher her SMV or lower?” You are seeing but not reading the text properly. The sentence you first quoted reads “based on her looks” and moreso if she passes the boner test and is high on a ten scale rather that if she will sleep with you. High SMV is she is hot and you want to sleep with her. Not that she… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

I didn’t participate in the last comment section on “Spring Break” because I thought most of the arguments were specious. Deti, thanks for the paragraphs on UMC (upper middle class) being less affected. I resonate with that and think you are spot on. I’m in that demographic and your explanation fits like a glove. For me, you and the UMC community around me, marriage is where it is at. In regards to the current essay (and realizing that it is a little more true for those that had the resources back then and now to self actualize) I keep myself… Read more »

Not Born This Morning
8 years ago

kfg-

You are correct. I got the threads crossed.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

“Maybe. I’ll let Rollo answer. He wrote “sexual availability” AFTER “based on her looks”. So boner-test-passing looks are a separate thing from “sexual availability”.” No need for you to wait for Rollo. Sexual availability is not equivalent to she is a slut and will sleep with anyone that comes along. That’s not to say that if you can get her and lock her down,before she sluts it up, and she is quality, Do IT. Sexually available means she is hot and you have the ability to lock her down. Not that she will sleep with anyone. I’m a little annoyed… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

If more married men are interested in keeping their wives interest in sex I would recommend Ian Ironwood’s books. He is a (excellent) writer by trade and as a sideline he comments on keeping your wife attracted to you. He is well researched in red pill awareness and game.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Furthermore, Yale Grad, what is your personal story? Most of the commentators detail their point of view to give legitimacy to what they say.
Rather than talk about broad talking points that are not in keeping of what Rollo has written about for 14 years in 410 essays and two books.

Not Born This Morning
8 years ago

Metallica “The Unforgiven” New blood joins this earth, And quickly he’s subdued. Through constant pained disgrace The young boy learns their rules. With time the child draws in. This whipping boy done wrong. Deprived of all his thoughts The young man struggles on and on he’s known A vow unto his own, That never from this day His will they’ll take away. What I’ve felt, What I’ve known Never shined through in what I’ve shown. Never be. Never see. Won’t see what might have been. What I’ve felt, What I’ve known Never shined through in what I’ve shown. Never free.… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Another thought is: that those recently accusing Rollo of not having congruence in his statements. Simply laughable and idiotic.

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  sjfrellc

@sjfrellc Survival is not for the fittest, because anyone can be stricken down at any minute, but it is for those that can adapt to the conditions that they are presented with. (That really gets into my trauma and coping like a women) my fathers stance growing up was cope just cope live I don’t care how just live. Stop being a baby and grow a pair. Violence+sex= serious boundary issues. @not born this morning In my time of need Opeth I can’t see the meaning of this life I’m leading I try to forget you as you forgot me… Read more »

Water Cannon Boy
Water Cannon Boy
8 years ago

Sexually available includes her inhibitions with being sexual.
You can check the story about the check list guy. He was able to have sex with his wife, but due to her multiple excuses and uptight personality, her value was next to zero due to her restrictive availability.

Mad Yale Grad
Mad Yale Grad
8 years ago

Rollo was the one to list it as the 2 main ingredients of female SMV, and he distinguished it from looks, so I’ll wait for him to clarify what he meant by “sexual availability”. sjfrellc, Hi. Since you addressed a few comments toward me I want to acknowledge that. I don’t imply that women and men, or even two individuals, are exactly the same. I also think you interpreted my “humans are not by nature monogamous” statements as being full scale promotion of debauchery. I am a family oriented traditionalist at heart and my respect for human sexuality fits within… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Bruce Jenner interview with Dianne Sawyer. The nadir fallacy of the show empowers the Feminine Imperative to have a negative feeling for the masculine imperative. Bruce Jenner engenders empathy. So masculine males should back it down a bit because they think guys wanting to be feminine are abnormal (< than x%). The whole tone is anti-masculine. He does not define anything. He is an anomaly.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

@Mad Yale Grad
April 24th, 2015 at 11:14 pm

What? You married? You doing OK? You want out of your situation?
What you say in comments has legitimacy for how you live.
I can’t tell your frame of reference.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

“I am a family oriented traditionalist at heart and my respect for human sexuality fits within the structure of extended parental investment that human offspring require. Due to the physical and emotional investment that human children and even young adults (teens) require from their parents, I am against the swinger lifestyle for people with children. A swinger lifestyle diverts time, energy, finances, etc away from children and puts everyone at risk for STDs. At the same my family oriented traditionalism is disgusted that a marriage, a home, a family, all years in the making, would be thrown away simply because… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Bloviating comes to mind.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Rugby, Don’t drink so much when posting and explain what what we can help with in Game adapting. Adapt to your circumstances but do it in a red pill awareness. Do adopt game skills. Game skills are universal, not just in getting laid.

Comment section here is for helping, No?

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  sjfrellc

@sjfrellc Not drinking just had a realy hard day dealing with people. By the way anytime I use the red pill know I am balanced and calm. Problem is their are many people who don’t appreciate that. It’s making life amazing by being aware I seem to be a threat. All my rugby games have gotten cancelled since getting deeper in the red pill. It’s been sad and I just found out Greg plitt died back in January. All these things are hard for me to handle. Rejection rejection rejection rejection rejection. No regret Best part about not having buffers… Read more »

olympiapress
8 years ago

I don’t want to lie and say I’m routinely banging women half my age, but younger hookups do happen for me now. And I’ve noticed, they often text you after for some mentoring. One was a 24-year-old civil engineer who’d just gotten her first real job, and continually asked me for advice on whether to buy a home, how to allocate her retirement, etc. I told her about my bank pulling out of Florida entirely because there were still way too many properties in default in the Orlando area, so maybe she ought to rent for a while. But the… Read more »

hoellenhund2
8 years ago

Rollo, this site needs a “latest 20 comments” / “recent comments” feature. Just saying.

BC
BC
8 years ago

@Mad Yale Grad:
Rollo was the one to list it as the 2 main ingredients of female SMV, and he distinguished it from looks, so I’ll wait for him to clarify what he meant by “sexual availability”.

What is the sexual market value of a beautiful woman who is otherwise completely sexually unavailable?

I think you may be confusing SMV with MMV (marriage market value).

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Still having a hard time interpreting what you are saying Rugby. And I don’t think spelling properly and formatting with paragraphs would help that much. What’s up with this rejection stuff? Sadness about George Plitt? What about if I never heard of him?

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  sjfrellc

@sjfrellc He used to do awsome workout feets. Such as sky dive into a waterfall than climb trees to get out of a Forrest all in one workout setting. I suppose what I mean by rejection is that the good parts of the red pill is that I am wrong about everything the bad parts are that my old support network doesn’t appreciate it at all. Their rejecting this new version of me that seems to bring the cold shoulder and many uninvited outings. It’s a beautiful because of what it means in the long run. Is that clear enought… Read more »

47 Ronin
47 Ronin
8 years ago

I have very young sons. This is cemented in my mind. I’ll put this “talk” right up there with the other “talk” when they’re old enough to understand.

Those of you with sons, we can’t let this wisdom or these opportunities pass us by. Stay vigilant. Here’s to Rollo’s wisdom trickling down through the generations. Maybe at some point, when enough have seen the truth, the tide will be turned.

sirtyrionlannister
8 years ago

It’s reasonable to assume that this kind of spurious SMV graphs are not an indication of real mating dynamic. And neither I see any need to keep old fallacies for the Manosphere, unsustainable from a scientific point of view. From this basis, firstly I’d suggest an alternative approach to the description of the term: “sexual mate value” based upon a principle of describing variation in both what we are measuring and which metric units we use, thus aiding comparisons across units. If you consider as a response curve that give the probability that a given man (by age) will mate… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
8 years ago

“For men who’ve experienced a nominally sexless marriage during that time, coming to the awareness that they’ve tolerated that state for so long and combined with a new realization of their SMV, men will deductively begin taking stock of their marriages.” “he finds himself experiencing the boons of that SMV and unable to truly capitalize on them because of his commitments.” The question then becomes, does he capitalize on that potential by renouncing on his previous commitment? For myself, this has been the only difficult part of my red pill education…how does one reconcile life’s previous blue pill decisions/commitments, that… Read more »

Lone Survivor
Lone Survivor
8 years ago

Caveclown, “For myself, this has been the only difficult part of my red pill education…how does one reconcile life’s previous blue pill decisions/commitments, that still effect my life today, with red pill awareness?” There are three words for that: self-awareness, self-awareness, self-awareness!!!! I recommend you “No more Mr. Nice Guy”, the book by Robert Glover. You cannot reconcile both pills. You have to rewire your brain to work under the red pill premises. It is a great challenge and elieve me, once you do it you will gain a great understanding of the relation between your parents, who your mother… Read more »

Atticus
Atticus
8 years ago

@lannister

I slogged through your poorly constructed article linked above. What’s your point? Rollo’s “spurious” graph describes when men peak. You seem to be analyzing marriage data. Two different things since the vast majority of men don’t have options and have been trained to marry around thirty.

Check out graphs in the link below.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2751179/Are-girl-22-Then-don-t-bother-online-dating-Alarming-graph-shows-ages-attractive-opposite-sex.html

Just a suggestion, but if write to convey your point rather than trying to seem scientific, you’ll be more successful.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Caveclown,
Are you talking about within a marriage? Married man game is tremendously more difficult than single man game because the stakes are extraordinarily high. It is more difficult to Keep Frame if you never had it in the first place.

Here are two links from Rollo’s essay and a link from Athol Kay on the mindset change needed for a red pill awareness.

http://therationalmale.com/2012/06/21/case-study-the-crazy/

http://therationalmale.com/2011/09/22/dream-girls-and-children-with-dynamite/

http://marriedmansexlife.com/2014/07/why-being-asshole-alpha-works-for-about-six-months/

What do you think about these three linked essays?

CaveClown
CaveClown
8 years ago

@Lone Survivor Thanks for the advice man. I have read NMMNG at least 5 times. Rollo’s book 3x and just started his preventative medicine book. I’m about 3 years into my red pill journey. I didn’t mean reconcile the mental understanding of prior blue pill decisions and current red pill awareness, I meant the actual action of changing my life to suit me. I “took stock” 3 years ago. I did not like what I saw. So I changed it. I tell you what, success and getting away from the nice guy/beta persona will let you know real quick who… Read more »

Tom
Tom
8 years ago

@sirtyrionlannister “It’s reasonable to assume that this kind of spurious SMV graphs are not an indication of real mating dynamic.” I understand that your comment reflects the average dating market. However, what Rollo is pointing out is that a man’s SMV is contingent upon successfully navigating one’s career, accumulating assets and optimizing health. If a man maximizes his success in these areas, then his SMV may well peak in his later years. Rollo’s SMV chart is an idealized representation of a man who has made the right moves, a man at his peak. If you want a unit based and… Read more »

Just Saying
Just Saying
8 years ago

Amused Mastery is particularly effective for older men / younger women Game.

Yes… yes it is…

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  Just Saying

@caveclown I tell you what, success and getting away from the nice guy/beta persona will let you know real quick who your real friends are. (Your right brother your right. It’s a wonderful punch in the gut.) @lone survivor It is a great challenge and elieve me, once you do it you will gain a great understanding of the relation between your parents, who your mother was before meeting your father, who your father was before he met your mother and how that shaped your blue pill mindset. It is the ultimate knowledge. (My parents made a point about the… Read more »

DT
DT
8 years ago

@CaveClown I’m right with you, buddy. I’m 42, about 2 years into my “red pill journey” and have recently taken stock of my position. Thinking back upon all the ways I allowed myself to be shamed into my current situation and all the bullshit I was sold. I’ve had a sexless marriage for about 12 years, 3 kids, and a wife who realizes that I could do much better, and who has made some changes to how she deals with me as a result – but I can see that the changes are done begrudgingly, and I suspect they won’t… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
8 years ago

“Are you talking about within a marriage? Married man game is tremendously more difficult than single man game because the stakes are extraordinarily high.”

sjfrellc,

It’s especially more difficult if you did a bad job at vetting, as I did.

Higher stakes? Like my kids and half (or more) of my money? Hey, bet big or go home…right? lol

Thanks for the links. I’m very familiar with Kay’s work.

CaveClown
CaveClown
8 years ago

DT,

Kids! I know that. I have two. Don’t want to break up the family, but I will do so if needed. I’m 33 years old.

Plenty of sex from my wife, but only because I have more orbiters than Jupiter. (dread)

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

RE: Sexual availability

I see what you did there Rollo. When you said beauty and sexual availability you meant it with the “and”. Not what Mad Yale grad implied among his friends– beauty “or” sexual availability.

Caveclown,

Another of Rollo’s essays might also be appropriate in in terms of advancing from the status quo: The Plan

http://therationalmale.com/2013/04/09/the-plan/

DT
DT
8 years ago

@CaveClown

I’m having a hard time seeing what your problem is, then. If your wife is treating you right, what’s your justification for renouncing your previous commitments?

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

” . . . it can be reasonably inferred from data/investigation that agrees in all frames of observation:” The data you present is only applicable to marriage within the current social frame of observation. In ancient Egypt, where neither the state nor the religion (as they were essentially the same) took any active role in marriage, there was no social concept of virginity and mating was an essentially personal affair, approximately 25% of women married men about their father’s age. That’s just for marriage, not pre-marriage screwing around. Rollo: ” Would you buy a Lamborghini if it had a 2-stroke… Read more »

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  kfg

@kfg But I freely admit that I am anything but typical. Ahaha Makes me one build one without the logo. Just walked by one in dc few days ago. Strange thing is having a car like that in a city is like have a hb11 at a McDonald’s an a date it can be romance for sure but it’s potential is limited based off its inherent design. Makes me think of alpha bux beta bux in class use. High class cars draw alpha in so many ways performance and use. One thing I’ve noticed about cars they show mindsets in… Read more »

CaveClown
CaveClown
8 years ago

DT,

If getting sex was the only indicator of a good marriage, then every crazy chick from here to timbuktu would have been wifed up by now.

DT
DT
8 years ago

CaveClown

Fair enough!

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago

Having driven a Lotus and a Lambo on a track for my birthday this year, I’d much prefer a Lotus. I’m strange like that.

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago
kfg
kfg
8 years ago

“Never use allegory on the internet.”

And just to rub it in, I’d also like the equivalent of a Lotus 11 and salt flat streamliner powered by two stroke weed whacker motors.

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

” . . . it’s potential is limited based off its inherent design.”

That’s why I bought a Maserati instead.

walawala
walawala
8 years ago

I”m pushing 50…I’ve worked on both inner game and outer game in the last 18 months. Outwardly, I have the techniques down, changed my wardrobe, work out regularly, look “mature” but not your dad’s “50”… Inner game-wise, I’ve now focused almost exclusively on gaming and banging girls below 30 with one or two exceptions who would be 32. Girls dig the whole mature confident vibe—which took time to hone. Amused mastery works great but it has to be consistent….you can’t chuckle at a girl’s foolish attempts at your attention then suddenly seem pitifully grateful. A lot of this for me… Read more »

Mad Yale Grad
Mad Yale Grad
8 years ago

“RE: Sexual availability.

Hot women are awesome. Unavailable, frigid or otherwise unfeminine women who are hot are frustrating.

Would you buy a Lamborghini if it had a 2-stroke lawnmower engine in it?”

OK I get it. But think about the STDs? In a young, college or bar-scene oriented “party years” context, the one pick up artists operate in, sexual availability signals a good time. When you’re looking for a wife and future mother of your children, it signals impending doom.

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago

@MYG

I think I’m going to just call you Lead from now on. You’re incredibly dense.

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  Sun Wukong

@MadYaleGrad
Well think of the inter workings your dealing with…
https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzbdvw99SKOeOhexTXExDsN8JzmS0Anyw
Frame and awareness may help one go to the other?
You can’t negotiate genuine desire. So you work on your. In the teo their is a saying. “To oppose is to support”

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

“…interesting that I have zero interest in women over 33 and they are now throwing themselves at me…”

Do not overlook the value of game knowledge applied to blowing women out. Getting rid of the women you don’t want is just as important as attracting the ones you do.

” When you’re looking for a wife and future mother of your children, it signals impending doom.”

It certainly does.

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  kfg
SilvrBk
SilvrBk
8 years ago

Thanks for this one, Rollo. Nowadays, i sometimes think that the correct way to be calibrated is to guage how much shame you are going to encounter and to choose that path which does no objective harm to anyone while simultaneously inviting maximal shame? I wonder what are your/commentators’ thoughts on this.

M Simon
8 years ago

sjfrellc
April 24th, 2015 at 9:07 pm

I always thought cheating was wrong. Not morally. But because it doesn’t maximize your value. What ever you do with other women – do it openly. It will make the woman you are with more attracted.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

“@MYG I think I’m going to just call you Lead from now on. You’re incredibly dense.” I’ll cosign that Sun. Male YG can’t see that if he wants to lock down a high quality woman at 23 to 25 years old, he has to attract her with his high SMV and high MMV before she gets her money’s worth she paid to ride the cock carousel in her party years. He has to have the pull to get her. He needs red pill awareness and game implementation. If you have to worry about STD’s you are engaging in a relationship… Read more »

Tom
Tom
8 years ago

@rugby11ljh
Status matters. I reversed my position on luxury goods a full
180 degrees after discovering Red pill philosophy. Conspicuous display of wealth is a requisite in mating. The display has to be calibrated to one’s target demographic of course but it must be done. Watch Youtube clips of Gad Saad if you would like to learn about how SMV is linked to luxury goods.

M Simon
8 years ago

sjfrellc April 25th, 2015 at 11:33 am http://marriedmansexlife.com/2014/07/why-being-asshole-alpha-works-for-about-six-months/ It has worked for me for 40+ years. I told the fm yesterday that the key to a long term relationship (LTR) was the male not respecting the female. She did not like it. But she had no counter. I told her that I still give her thrills and how many of her friends in LTRs can say that about their mate? After some discussion of the matter it turned out the number was zero. Other than her. I play “dread” with her continuously. And back it up by outrageous flirting when… Read more »

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago

@Rollo

I would think a Yale grad could figure out how to use the search feature.

Making use of the search feature would be incompatible with the “hubris” app he’s currently running.

Striver
Striver
8 years ago

As far as prior sexual relations enhancing a man’s value, that only works in certain circumstances. An example. Suppose you have 10 men and 10 women. No one has paired off for LTR/marriage yet. Before that happens, all ten of the women sleep with one of the men. Five sleep with man #1, three with man #2, and one each with man #3 and man #4. Now they pair off. All but one woman, the one who scores man #1, are going to be unhappy. Keep in mind that although man #3 and man #4 scored a woman, it was… Read more »

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  Striver

@Tom I’ll look him up @SilvrBk The shame part I think is a safety feature for people are get scared on a sexual way from someone etheir going or staying. For me Shame got me into the red pill because it was overused like a bullhorn at a cross country race. Their comes a point where social conventions lose their hold on you as you only get negative feedback from them over and over again. A good example of this is social acceptable violence. SJW can talk how violence makes society a horrid brutal existence. However it’s for me something… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

@M Simon April 25th, 2015 at 3:36 pm I appreciate the thought and know how it operates for you. I’m too experienced in life to worry about morality. I truly think Anonymous in the last Spring Break essay did the right thing (and should stop obsessing over it). I truly think men based on their natures are OK if they cheat (given motive and opportunity) and woman based on their natures should remain monogamous until their mates are dead or leave. If I tried to cheat my wife would first laugh, get disgusted second (because her provisioning was threatened), and… Read more »

Mad Yale Grad
Mad Yale Grad
8 years ago

Calm down fellas. I was under the impression that SMV and MMV were the same for women, whereas for men its alpha fucks (SMV) and beta bucks (MMV). Rollo appears to apply a two pronged mating strategy regarding mens’ interest in women as well. Attractive and available (SMV) and attractive and restricted (MMV). I get it now. “[…] to understand the precariousness of it. These are the men who tend to rely on the fallacy of relational equity and the equalist hope that his wife can be expected to rationally appreciate the sacrifices […]” From the comments section at Relational… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

M Simon April 25th, 2015 at 4:08 pm My understanding of you from your posts is that you always kept frame from the beginning and never lost it. What that Athol Kay post was meant to warn about and what Rollo’s Children with Dynamite essay was trying to say is that if someone lost frame to a dominant woman and lapsed into a Beta frame, then learning game and upping the Alpha (asshole), without comfort stores, then he is just an asshole. You lose. She leaves. I’ve seen it happen in real life for colleages. Upping the asshole Alpha with… Read more »

Mad Yale Grad
Mad Yale Grad
8 years ago

Rollo, from your AFC Social Conventions posting;

“Despite of all this, the odds that you’ll die from a form of cancer, heart disease, smoking or obesity related diseases, or even an alcohol related traffic fatality far outweigh any risk of dying from a venereal disease in western society. The mortality rate for for contracting gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, herpes and even HIV pale in comparison to many – in some cases more easily preventable – diseases.”

You didn’t list HPV, which is the most common, and which can lead to cancer in both men and women.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Mad Yale Grad
April 25th, 2015 at 4:33 pm

That is the most unintelligible group of words I have ever seen posted in the comments section. What actually is your agenda?

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  sjfrellc
sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Striver, I would say that more sexual experiences for a man enhances him. That man. I didn’t imply that it helped a Long Term Relationship. It’s axiomatic that the #1 Alpha is not good at an LTR. He either gets killed in battle or he next’s the woman.

The stunt by Anonymous, was a “pause that refreshes” in his marriage. Coming clean and admitting it to his wife will do nothing but put a shiv in him.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

“You didn’t list HPV, which is the most common, and which can lead to cancer in both men and women.”

I shake my head at the lack of understanding the general public has–let alone alleged Yale grads– as to the difference between absolute risk and relative risk.

M Simon
8 years ago

Striver April 25th, 2015 at 4:26 pm It turned into the happy hunting ground for me. I Nexted until one of them decided “I’m sticking with you no matter what”. The Nell (Dudley DoRight) scenario. I saw that in her. She avoids expressing it as much as she can (not much power there) but that type of desire can be found even among the sluts. You just have to go through a lot of them. And she was never (despite being a 9) an avid carousel girl. She was only looking at Alphas and to this day expresses disdain for… Read more »

M Simon
8 years ago

sjfrellc
April 25th, 2015 at 5:05 pm

That sort of behavior has enhanced my relationship. I tell her, “The way to get rid of dread is to want me more than any other woman does.” So far she has always risen to the occasion. I remind her of that. “You can’t win by fighting, only by wanting me more.”

A Definite Beta Guy
8 years ago

What the fuck is with this Yale Grad dumbass?

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago

@Tom
Does a plane count as high status?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cNURIZWLm1M

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

sjfrellc : That sells a shit ton of “healthy” food, statins and lottery tickets. Where’s the incentive to wise up the chumps?

Jeremy
8 years ago

Sun,

What’s the contact procedure for that group you were trying to start?

M Simon
8 years ago

sjfrellc April 25th, 2015 at 4:43 pm I admire your life’s story (for red pill awareness). But you never lost frame and were always Alpha. Actually, I was as Beta as they come until age 18 when my very first GF wized me up. It is unusual to get Red Pilled by a woman. Doubly so back in 1962. Funny enough I was one of her plates. She had at least 4 spinning during the time I was with her. I eventually “lost” her to a divinity student who promised to make an “honest” woman out of her. Ah. Well.… Read more »

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

A Definite Beta Guy: “What the fuck is with this Yale Grad dumbass?”

Having associated with them, I suspect your answer is embedded in the question.

Jeremy: Likewise, I’m sure.

M Simon
8 years ago

M Simon April 25th, 2015 at 5:47 pm One of the things she saw in me was that I had incipient Alpha game. The first time she tried to get me in bed I declined because she was having an emotional reaction to some old memories. And I was a virgin just crazy to have sex and finally become a “man” at the time. But in the back of my head I wanted my first time to be as perfect as possible. Besides the drinking to get warmed up (starting at about 8 or 9 PM) it lasted until about… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

M Simon, if you were a convert to the red pill at 18 and remained Alpha from then on, I would call that you were Alpha out of the gate in the race of life. H/T to you. So my essay links to Athol’s essay and two of Rollo’s was in regards to losing frame and trying to wrestle it back in a LTR. There is no doubt Alpha is desired as a prerequisite. Having the ability to dance with the right amount of Beta (in marriage with kids) without going full out Blue Valentine is necessary. Good thing we… Read more »

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

@ KFG.

“That sells a shit ton of “healthy” food, statins and lottery tickets. Where’s the incentive to wise up the chumps?”

Point well taken. The cartel of petroleum, government bureaucracy, doctors and lawyers fees, frivorce courts Etc. can hoodwink most of the people most of the time.

I wasn’t there, but wising up the Gang of Men 20,000 years ago was probably de rigueur. And if anyone is listening it is still appropriate in this enclave.

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  sjfrellc

This still hits a cord on what it may have been like that long ago.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ML1OZCHixR0
Tool
We are tools game is utilizing those tools for new survival.

Striver
Striver
8 years ago

MSimon: You are at the right end of the bell curve. You got trained in your teens by an older woman. Most men do not get that training. If you’re the Fonz, there are still Richie, Ralph, and Postie. And lamer guys that couldn’t even make it on the TV show. There are always going to be more guys in the middle, average guys, than the top guys. Game is never going to change that. Guys in the middle always have to wait for it and work for it harder. The top women actually have fewer partners than the middle… Read more »

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  Striver

@Striver Do you feel like the right is harder to stay in with today’s climate of open hypergamy? What can we hold on from the past that has a lasting impact on the youth? Does 27 count as youth by the way? When’s a good time to even bring up the red pill truths to your children and how do you deal society’s two lacks raising a family and handling money? Where do you go from 2015 does religion as a social convention have to be in place to keep the ways of the old? How do you lead with… Read more »

Softek
Softek
8 years ago

I’d like to add that intact families aren’t the end of the story. Just because parents don’t get divorced doesn’t mean everything is okay. Although Rollo’s already written about this, I just want to share a little to emphasize the point. Part of par-for-the-course RP, IMO, should be about how to raise children to be RP aware — at least boys. A throwback to the old days where it was standard practice to teach boys how to hunt, fish, make a fire, and do basic manly things. And being able to respond to boys’ questions about girls and relationships with… Read more »

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  Softek

@Softek
That’s beautiful.

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago

@Jeremy

Haven’t established that yet. Took a day off today for apartment hunting as I’ve gotta move in two months. Gonna spend this evening working on it.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Mad Yale Grad,

Next time you see a HB8+ 23 to 25 year old, tell her I said Hi! (whether she has cancer causing HPV or not).

And then tell her:
” You’re a cherry blossom
You’re about to bloom
You look so pretty, but you’re gone so soon”

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago

@sjfrellc

Time to change that handle to Oscar Fucking Wilde.

LiveFearless
8 years ago

@Male Yale Grad, Sirtyrion… It’s time to understand why Rollo Tomassi writes this stuff. You imply a higher intelligence so reading this short Rollo Tomassi essay (from 2011) http://therationalmale.com/2011/10/26/whats-your-problem/ will be simple for you.

Experiencing its meaning and understanding why it matters on a worldwide scale is another matter.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

@Sun Wukong
April 25th, 2015 at 8:03 pm
sjfrellc
“Time to change that handle to Oscar Fucking Wilde.”

Sun, I’m going to have to rely on you to tell me if that is good or or that is bad. Thanks, perhaps ( or,not).

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago

@sjfrellc

Haha, just chuckling about the poetry.

Tom
Tom
8 years ago

@Softek
Get a prostitute or travel to the Philippines. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XnbjxMSyDY
This man is pushing 50, absolutely did not maximize his SMV and he is making love to a cute 5/6. If the Philippines is out of the question, Mexico or Central America are viable alternates. Mail order brides are an American tradition dating back to the gold rush in California. Have no shame. And if you do…”That’s pride fucking with you.”

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Simply copied from Fall Out Boy’s song “Centuries” which I just heard in my truck when I went to pick up a burger at Five Guys for the wife. She had an upset stomach and instead of eating my side dish of barley, sage and home grown shiitake mushrooms (in oak logs) or the spicy New Orleans style red beans in rice with Andouille I would have whipped up in the pressure cooker, she opted for the burger with mustard, ketchup, lettuce and jalapenos. Go figure how rational women are. I posted a lot last night after dinner at a… Read more »

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago

@sjfrellc

Ooooo, great idea. Perhaps I should consider Pensive College Dropout.

kfg
kfg
8 years ago

sjfrellc: She bloomed 8 to 10 years ago and she’s coming down with the first stiff breeze.

sjfrellc
sjfrellc
8 years ago

Me, I’m an amateur botanist. The weeping cherry outside my library window is just opening the blooms. Some horny birds were eating the blossoms today. Frost tonight with temps down to 27 degrees prompted me to move my spring cuttings of Salix caprea into the garage (otherwise known as French Pussy Willow). Cut the grass for the first time this morning. The creeping Phlox is readying to bloom. Juneberry bushes are readying to flower. Time to start preparing the ground to plant round up ready sugar beets out at the hunting property. The rhubarb is coming to life out there.… Read more »

Dragonfly
8 years ago

“What the fuck is with this Yale Grad dumbass?”

lol exactly Rollo… I’ve been putting up with his comments (and he’s now commented on my site more than anyone has… almost surpassing ME) for over a month now! And I still haven’t blocked or spammed him.

Mad Yale Grad
Mad Yale Grad
8 years ago

Can the red pill protect against falling in love?

rugby11ljh
rugby11ljh
8 years ago
Reply to  Mad Yale Grad

@Mad Yale grad
Can the red pill protect against falling in love?
I do not think so. It’s not something I know about but I do know Rollo wrote two essays about this awhile ago. Let me find the links.

Dragonfly
8 years ago

sjfrellc… about Anonymous… I think reading the word “cheating” for me immediately brings out the indignation. I thought I understood sexless marriages… but they are much more complex that I initially thought.

Sun Wukong
Sun Wukong
8 years ago

@Lead

Stop being a goddamn moron and read or bugger off.

For supposedly having such an expensive education, they sure didn’t teach you shit about how to learn.

Tom
Tom
8 years ago

@Softek
Get a prostitute or travel to Southeast Asia. If you are from the Western world, you are almost guaranteed to get laid. If you are white and American, you will have to fight off women. SMV is relative.

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