We’ll Do It (almost) Live!


As announced, I did the interview with Christian McQueen and Dagonet last Saturday and the show is now live.

We went for a solid hour and a half, so be prepared for a lot of content. I did my best to answer question submissions but in an interview like this it’s difficult to go into the depth I’d like to and still get to everything. Overall I think it was an amazing show and it was great getting to talk with Christian and Dagonet – I really appreciated the plug for my charity at the end, I didn’t expect that (thanks guys).

As I mentioned in the prior thread, I don’t really do many interviews. It’s not that I don’t like to, it’s usually a logistics thing for me, but mainly because of time constraints and my wanting to consider a topic in more depth than that time will allow.

I’ll be posting this week’s essay on Thursday because I’d like to do an open comment thread for the show here and get some feedback from readers/listeners for a few days. If you’d like to discuss something I covered from the show this is the thread to bring it up in. I’ll do my best to answer for the rest of the week.

I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did doing it.


Published by Rollo Tomassi

Author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine

98 comments on “We’ll Do It (almost) Live!

  1. I listened to this excellent presentation in its entirety. It was very informative and thought provoking; and it flipped some switches in my mind. For proof, as I went about my days chores, I felt a peacefulness, and a sense of closure on a relationship I just concluded.

    Needless to say, I have purchase “The Rational Male” and look forward to digesting it. Much to my chagrin, I had to resort to the Urban Dictionary to a discover the meaning of a number of the acronyms you all use, but keep it up !

    Many thanks, and I appreciate your efforts !

    Hanover County, Va

  2. I listened to about 20 mins and then cut it off. The one host who kept saying ‘cunt’ was highly annoying and spent too much time talking. Also, I wasn’t learning anything I didn’t already know from this blog. Sorry, that’s my honest opinion.

  3. “I listened to about 20 mins and then cut it off. The one host who kept saying ‘cunt’ was highly annoying”

    Agreed. The profanity is childish. The host was vulgar.

    It would have been more effective as a polite discussion. Not a “doushbag” type interview. Discrediting

    Rollo, the no doom and gloom, optimism and bottom up were insightful.

    I see the opportunism as bilogical. This is a society of women and drones. And 3-4% true Alphas

  4. In this life, there are people that have mastery of certain elements – people I know I can learn from even if I do not agree with everything they say.

    “I listened to about 20 mins and then cut it off.” If you’re that person, you’d do well to read A Christian McQueen Book

    Rollo accepted the interview with Christian McQueen (CM) on purpose. CM has had experiences most men haven’t, his advice works well in business and this podcast will introduce thousands more people to The Rational Male. That’s a good thing.

  5. Host was vulgar, not very insightful (probably linked to his self-centeredness), tiresome and constantly faking a Barry White like bass tone. Also bashing your co-host is childish. Seems he is a life coach … heh

  6. “CM has had experiences most men haven’t, his advice works well in business and this podcast will introduce thousands more people to The Rational Male.”

    I don’t have the exact numbers but The RM is way bigger than CM. It’s the other way around really. CM did a piss poor job.

  7. @Nathan: Yes, in the future I’d advise Rollo not to interview with 2 ‘disc jockey radio clown’ dudes…and sit down with someone for a more formal, in-depth discussion.

    Find a format that’s more appropriate to the serious, quasi-academic, layered, and complex subject matter Rollo writes about.

  8. From the Christian McQueen Show (21 minutes in? No. 76 minutes in.)

    Women (do not) expect romance from their alpha stud…The guy that she was (with) when she was 25… in her dorm room… that guy didn’t bring her roses, ok, that guy didn’t bring her a nice glass of wine and have some (lame) date night.
    ~Rollo Tomassi

    … wish I had known this when I was in college.

  9. @douchebagdeluxe

    I believe in enlightened self interest, and what that means is, I can’t help anybody until I’ve helped myself. And then, the people who I’ve helped after that, I’m in a better position (to help them) because I’ve helped myself to the point where I’m going, ok… I’m going to help you out, I’m going to be a good husband, I’m going to be a good father… because, now I’m in a better position to do all of that stuff.

    ~Rollo Tomassi

    Michael Jordan said, “To be successful, you have to be selfish, or else you never achieve.”

  10. This big planned (lame) event,
    that’s not what
    Romance is.
    Romance is the… bag of skittles,
    Romance is… that little gum-wrapper ring you made
    Romance is… your sweaty shirt on the ground that she picks up and takes a whiff of because she likes the way that you smell…
    Romance isn’t… created…
    Romance is spontaneous and
    Romance happens
    and the (stuff) that women are going to remember the most,
    especially from their Alpha Lovers in the past, ok…
    It’s not going to be any gesture that that guy did
    It’ll be a song that was playing at the time
    It’ll be a smell
    It’ll be something that… brings back that emotional state again.

    ~Rollo Tomassi, while being interviewed on the CMQ Show

    (slightly edited for those with fear… Rollo spoke this part near the end of the show)

  11. Michael Jordan said, “To be successful, you have to be selfish, or else you never achieve.”

    I may not get the details exactly right, but I think the story involves Tex Winters (assistant coach). Anyways, he told Michael there is no “I” in team, and Michael responded, yes, you are right, but there is an “I” in WIN

  12. Great podcast Rollo! I’ll be buying and reading your book soon.

    I’m a straight male college student and guess what today’s English assignment is…

    “Compare and/or contrast people’s perceptions regarding the behavior of males and females. Are males and females, for example, expected to behave in a similar way? Provide examples, but do not use specific names. Integrate the summary/paraphrase of ideas from at least two assigned essays for Week 8.”

    Here are the titles and authors of the essays if you want to check them out:

    “Femininity” by Susan Brownmiller

    “Samson in Chains” by Annie Dillard

    “The Smurfette Principle” by Katha Pollitt

    “The Right Stuff” by Tom Wolfe

    “The Androgynous Man” by Noel Perrin

    This topic is EVERYWHERE! Especially on college campuses.


  13. Awesome!!

    I love listening to interviews. No comments to sift through or any distractions — a lot of times I’ll listen to interviews when I’m working out or getting ready for bed and lying down. Very convenient and being able to hear a human voice discuss these things instead of just reading about them brings another element into the picture that I like a lot.

    Although the topics are very in-depth and I’ve had to spend a lot of time carefully reading through these posts, thinking things over and experimenting. I can see what you mean with wanting to focus on writing.

    But anyway, very cool. A breath of fresh air.

  14. Rollo,

    Christian McQueen has a well-developed or naturally excellent speaking voice. However, I think he is mostly a bullshit poser. He is quite the peacock, but more in a theatrical way rather than a natural way. He is still young and for his sake, I hope he isn’t taught a very needed lesson by someone like this…..


    During my college years, I was a member of a hard core weight lifting gym, body building, power lifting, etc. Some members were like the guy above. One had been a machine gunner on a medical evacuation chopper in Vietnam. He survived several tours, killed hundreds helping to save and rescue some of our guys. Another was a member of HAMC like the guy in the picture. You could call them “Real Alphas” (or whatever the fuck).

    I was not born this morning.

    One evening, several of us were at a bar drinking beer and shooting pool. Three of these “real alphas” were with us. Everybody was having fun, loosening up, getting to know each other better, etc. A group of girls was hanging out at a table next to the pool tables we were playing on and we started talking with them. There was definitely sexual attraction between members of the two groups, and we were sizing each other up, but everybody was talking to each other like we were real people, not “targets” (women are humans; they are not inanimate objects with pussies, asses and tits). Some guy nobody knew came up and started some “pick up line” on one of the girls. He was acting real cocky, posing like he wanted to look like a bad ass, etc. It was the classic PUA type “game” bullshit and everybody knew; it is always obvious. A couple of the girls burst out laughing at him. The one he had “targeted” said, “Oh, you’re cute”. She was not attracted to him; she was trying to smooth things over. It did not work. He kept up his “approach”. She was less than interested and became uncomfortable with him. One of the “real alphas” stepped over and very nicely asked him to leave. Instead of leaving, he stepped between the girl and the man who asked him to leave and tried to pull her away by her waist. He was immediately dragged out the back of the bar into the street and TOLD to leave. Instead of leaving this time, he said something about calling the police, steroids and karate. I left before the police and ambulance arrived after his face was smashed into the concrete curb gutter about 7 times.

    Orlando Florida, 1992 I managed a construction project for Walt Disney World (Lake Buena Vista). Our crew was Mexican immigrant men. There were the usual whores, some of the crew fucked on the weekends. About half the crew had an orgy one weekend with two girls “from Georgia”. At the end of the project, we all went to a strip club. Everyone had been paid a big bonus. One of the guys was only 19. He had never “been laid” and looked younger than his age. He was talking with a couple girls when one of the bouncers walked over and asked for his ID. They had seen his ID at the door and let him in. The bouncer’s real problem was that this kid was Mexican and the girls were white. The bouncer was one of these guys who had spent some time in the gym mostly working on his biceps and pecks, skinny legs, walked around with his smallish lats perpetually flexed. He should never have been a bouncer, and was not after that night. The Mexican kid got cocky and said he didn’t give a shit, the guy covering the door let him in. At this the bouncer grabbed his arm, pulled him out of the club. There were about 15 of us, three bouncers. We decided to leave and go somewhere else. As we were crossing the parking lot, the Mexican kid turned around and yelled “fuck you!” at the bouncer who had pulled him outside. The bouncer walked up and assaulted him hitting him in the face, splitting his cheek wide open (the next day the kid literally looked about 5 years older). A bloody fight ensued; all three bouncers went to the hospital including the one who started the fight…..with a broken beer bottle rammed into his intestines.

    Some “real alphas” literally seek posers and bullshit artists to kick their asses for the fun of it, for sport.

    This is not “game” this is real life and we only live once.

    Have you ever noticed that people who are successful do not go about telling everyone about it and how they did it…unless their intent is to scam you and everyone else they can scam? The really successful are busy being successful and enjoying their success and have no desire to waste time bragging about it…or selling it. Each person’s success is up to each person.

    PUA’s, bullshit artists, and posers are typically insecure or quacks who do not want to do the work it takes to develop their real masculinity. They are masquerading. They would rather attempt to substitute real masculinity with bullshit, like telling other males “how it is done”, pretending they have done it, etc. Actions and real results, not results lied about on the internet or in books, speak louder than words because actions and results speak for themselves making words unnecessary. Posers lie about “how many “bitches they’ve fucked”, how they used this or that line and fucked this or that girl on the first date. Does anyone but them really care? The only person who really knows or cares about your sex life is you. Their “game” and lies are easily recognized by their shallowness and lack of consistency. They fabricate “game” and lies to fool and distract themselves from doing the work it takes to be successful and hope to fool you also. A prime example of lack of consistency is McQueens comment at 52 minutes 29 seconds into the interview….”god forbid a relationship ends”… His statement directly undeniably implies that he values long term relationships yet only a few minutes before he braggingly commented something about “fucking 20 women for the year”. That’s fucking a different woman on an average of one every 2.6 weeks. Throughout the entire discussion he demonstrates lack of consistency about this. He consistently makes comments that reflect a strong desire for commitment from a woman while he consistently portrays himself as not caring about it. He is full of shit. A lot of what he says is true and hopefully he understands the true parts but the way he laughs, indirectly brags about himself, and feigns dominance is easily detected. No scam artist or bull shitter can be successful without the use of some truth. I’ve been married 20 years our daughter is 15. You’ve been married 18 years, your daughter is 16. I wonder what your wife and daughter think of McQueen. Does he make them horny? Do they dream of having him? Or, do they think he is full of shit? Either a man is for real or he is not. He either has strength, confidence and inhibition or he does not. Women are extremely sensitive to this and reality cannot be faked. “Game” is often literally a buffer posers adopt to avoid the real effort that brings real results. Find me just one woman who values that kind of “game” mentality from a man for any kind of relationship and I will find you the Holy Grail, Elvis, the fountain of youth, the lost city of Atlantis, the city of gold and both our “soul mates”.

    “Real alphas” are sometimes body builders, power lifters, HAMC members. They are sometimes successful wealthy executives or business owners. They can be nothing more than an electrician or plumber. They are NEVER posers, PUA’s, or bullshit artists. They aren’t “trying” to “win” in “the game of life”. They are naturally succeeding regardless of the dynamics.

    The “real alphas” do not give a shit about any of the stuff we discuss on this blog. They have no reason and no need to give a shit about any of this. They consider the entire “manosphere” and everything about it pitiful and a forum for sissys.

    We analyze and discuss these dynamics and for many of us it helps. This is good; it helps to provide a road map from “sissydom” to “Alpha”. Your contribution to the road map is the best I’ve encountered. You are describing your observations and evaluations rather than saying “look at me, I’m not like all you losers, look what I’ve done!” Perhaps this is because you apply yourself objectively and honestly trying to express the truth rather than trying to masturbate your ego. Thanks for your efforts; you apparently have an excellent mind.

    But “at the end of the day” no man can get his manhood from another man. It is up to each individual to realize his manhood. There is no other way to “take back” our masculinity.

  15. It was really great to hear you verbally express the ideas you write about,it makes it easier to see what you mean. I am not particularly offended or bothered by the hosts, but I have to admit they weren’t really up to t he task. Ironically it’s the host that was in the midst of a breakup, not the one who was trying desperately to be alpha, that would have been the more fruitful interviewer because he is in the midst of many of the things we all talk about here. His need for personal answers would have lead, I think, to much more relevant questions and answers without the posturing getting in the way.
    Towards the end of the interview when you talked about performance again was very good… Hearing you explain it solidified my previous “aha” moment.
    This audio thing is really good at helping internalize the message.

  16. I listened to the podcast. I find the you are a down to earth no nonsense guy. Refreshing. More oldschool than I thought. I now read your blog with a different eye. Kudos and you have a new follower…

  17. Take a good look at Christian McQueen


    Do you see a man or do you see a flamboyant hair style. expensive watch, cigar, sunglasses, sports coat….heads up guys, .women see straight through this shit…poser…. who else would need the props…you don’t need them to get laid or loved by a woman.

    Rollo, you transcend and eclipse this.

  18. Start listening from around here:

    @1:14:00 “I tell guys when I was in my 20’s…women are not going to expect romance from their alpha stud…it’s going to be because they are there in the moment.”

    This was the key message… “Women love opportunistically.”

    It’s a painful truth.

  19. Enjoyed listening. The point about MRAs being just as obsessed with equalism as feminists was illuminating.

    Traditional complementarianism (as defined here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complementarianism ) is something we can expect to remain under heavy fire from the mainstream for the forseeable future.

    The MRA/MGTOW tendency towards equalism may be more about calling out bullshit than a sincere desire to flatten everyone into interchangeable automatons. That doesn’t make it – or any nihilism it might point towards – any less dangerous. I appreciate the way you transitioned into a call for inner development.

    Host brings up a few good perspectives amidst the chuffing, sounds like Chris Collinsworth

  20. @Rollo You articulated yourself just as well as I thought you would. There was something therapeutic about hearing you share red pill examples from your life.

    @CM @ Dagonet Great job MC’n the podcast and keeping the flow going. I am not sure where all the hate is coming from. They must not be familiar with your podcast or brand. Sucks to be them.

    I most certainly agree that it felt like you guys only scratched the surface of what The Rational Male is all about.

    So much to digest.

    Thanks for doing this. -dcl

  21. Live Fearless

    You better keep posting those verbatim quotes because I had to turn off the host of this interview after 20 minutes.

    The host sounded like he’s Scott Shannon’s son and auditioning for a Morning FM Zoo position. He keeps directing all attention back to himself. Notice how they “lost” Rollo about 20 minutes in. That move sort of checked the hosts to settle down. Who knows where this would have wound up if Rollo just sat there and let them steamroll him

    As other commenters have mentioned above — Note how bad repetitive cursing comes across in any conversation you are listening to for more than a few minutes.

    The host’s endless “fucking” “shit” and “Cunt” bombs added nothing. Instead of adding to the impact your having on an audience – you come across as vulgar, and ignorant.

    There IS a place for candid, frank, earthy, talk between men. But this kind of vulgarity is not the way to get there. Per Robert Green in 48 LAWS: ‘You will always come across better to people taking a dignified pose as opposed to vulgarity’

    The charismatic man rarely curses publicly – if at all.

    A better forum for Tomassi would have been something more akin to the setting Krauser’s London Real interview. The hosts there at least let him talk. YouTube that video and observe the difference.

    A good interview is ALWAYS where the interviewer takes a backseat and cedes the stage and spotlight to the interviewee.

  22. @ George

    lol at your weird rant and then finally fessing up that your daughter is 15.

    i love agenda driven emotional pleas dressed up as “here, I’ll show you how its REALLY done”. best start to my morning past the 3 S’s.

  23. Rollo,

    At some point during the interview you mention that you trust your wife but you are not naive. Then you go on saying that if you become a drunkard or poor, you will understand your wife if she leaves you. This is quite a bold but also general statement from your side.

    To what extent do we accept hypergamy as a real condition and how much does it really exist? I mean I searched allover the internet for scientific research on hypergamy and I found nothing. Thus I cannot consider it as a genetic condition but rather as a social condition developed while growing up.

    You have been with your wife for more than 18 years. Do you really believe that if things at some point go wrong and for some reason you won’t be able to support your family financially, she won’t accept you anymore? Do your really believe that she cannot be supportive and help you deal with a crisis and move on together?

    I don’t know if you have covered these questions in a previous post but if you have please redirect me.

  24. @George
    your violent stories are the beta rage fantasies of a father terrified and powerless because deep down he knows his daughter will almost certainly end up on her knees expertly pleasing the kind of fake poser douchebag that he himself so despises.

  25. Rollo, I’d like your view on this:


    This post has been prophetic. It literally explained my last relationship as if the guy had a brain monitor installed in my head.

    I know you’ve touched on this, but the assertion that this is a standard process, and it is linear and unavoidable, is very fascinating to me. My experiences reflect this 100%, and also that of my peers.

    The process cannot be stopped. It is inherent, it is dictated by nature. The only way to win is to not enter exclusivity contracts (implied or explicit).

  26. Rollo “90% of men are betas” Tomassi conducts an hour-long+ interview without ever once referencing Homer, Jesus, Moses, Jefferson, Virgil, or Dante nor any of the GREAT BOOKS FOR MENZ LZLOZLZLZLOOZOOLOLZZLlzzlzll lzooz

    That’s becuz me an Dal kn takeit frum here…lzolzllolz,…

  27. I’m behind you, Rollo, and fully supportive.

    At the same time, GB4M’s point has merit. Should it be callously thrown away?

  28. This whole alphabet thing is only an analogy. It’s a system that attempts to *describe* reality; it is not reality itself. If we assign a different “type” of human to each of the 24 characters of the Greek alphabet, it still wouldn’t be anywhere near enough to accurately model the wilderness of reality with any resolution. The analogy will always break down.

    While it can provide a useful shorthand in getting a point across, I think the myopic focus on two Greek letters, where to draw a line between them in any given situation, and the attempt to filter all human behaviour through a binary lens leaves little room for nuance, too much room for misinterpretation, and is often counterproductive.

  29. Eon- thanks for that article and turning me on to that site…. It definitely is eye opening and definitely is something I need to think on. I find myself agreeing with it instinctively.
    Lots of food for thought.

  30. Well, actually the word monogamy is usually pronounced mo-NOG-amy (məˈnägəmē according to my computer dictionary: the convention is that the syllable following the apostrophe ‘ is emphasized). And the dictionary shows the same pattern with hypergamy: hīˈpərgəmē, or hy-PER-gamy. The English language tends to mangle words imported from other languages, especially Greek – often placing emphasis quite illogically in terms of the meaning or structure of the word, but somehow it seems to be required that way by the rhythm of the spoken language. I’d wondered about the pronunciation of hypergamy myself, was interested to hear your version, and looked it up.

  31. You cut it off after 20 minutes? Please stay away from all seasons of “Californication” currently included with a Netflix account and with an Amazon Prime membership.

    Some of the truths you’ve read about are demonstrated (taught) in that show, but…

  32. I found the interview interesting… I might say enjoyable (at least the parts where Rollo was talking) except that by the end I really wanted it to stop so I could go wash out my head with soap. I will certainly never listen to it again. In 96 minutes I’d guess the “f” word was used, what, over 100 times? This guy really needs to get a dictionary, and discover that not only does the English language include a lot of words (far more than any other language in fact), but they don’t all begin with “f”.

    I had to laugh, though, hearing the relentlessly foul-mouthed “host” complaining about what’s happened to traditional morality. “Things that used to be shamed…” Like spewing sewage constantly out of your mouth?

    Like most males, I learned profanity growing up, and used it frequently in my youth (though nothing like what seems to be the “norm” nowadays – there was a time, believe it or not, when the “f” word was reserved for occasions of extreme stress, not just a substitute for “um”). Somewhere in my 30s it occurred to me that I really didn’t like having that stuff in my head (or coming out of my mouth), and I’ve been working on eliminating it for some time. Not an easy habit to break, I will attest – but if you don’t even try, you’re certainly not going to do it.

    I must say, “men” simultaneously bragging about their three-digit “N” while also complaining about the moral character of modern women and the dearth of innocent virgins seems to me to require a level of cognitive dissonance that is rather mind-boggling. Is it pot, meet kettle? Or kettle, meet pot?

    I mean, how can you ever expect to find anything of value in a sexual relationship when you lard your speech with a vulgar slang term for the sexual encounter? If what you’re spewing about is what you do with your wife in the privacy of your bedroom – well, no wonder the divorce rate is reaching such heights.

    Frankly, it looks to me that the crass, foul vulgarity of modern “women” is really nothing but a mirror to the character of modern “men”. If men should be “in charge”, first they need to be men – not overgrown pubescent males with no sense of decency or restraint. A man’s first task is to master himself. You simply cannot expect to be the master of a woman if you act like a child. If this is the “Manosphere” it needs to take a good look at itself.

  33. ” . . . a vulgar slang term for the sexual encounter? ”

    Despite my French ancestry, I can’t say that I find the Saxon any more vulgar than the Norman.

    I do, however, find myself anthropomorphizing the word and imagine it saying, ” Don’t adjectify me!”

  34. The single best definition of the Red Pill:

    “The Red Pill today is basically called being a man a few decades ago; our grandfather’s would be like, yah, no shit.”

    I thought the name was “Rollo” like the “O” in TOp and not the “O” in Row and “Hypergamy” had the accent on the first syllable.

  35. @George

    I agree completely with you, but I also understand “Posers” and why Real Alphas and also Betas don’t like them. “Posers” are trying to go up in hierarchy. This trying is more costly than alphas think because it takes effort to try to be alpha and even to pose when you don’t have a Alpha mindset. If we hate “Posers” we are saying that guys that by life constraints, genetics (or whatever is the reason is) are beta and are in the bottom of hierarchy don’t have a right to have hope to go up in hierarchy? Growing from beta to a real alpha mentality is extremely difficult, not impossible but the success rate is for sure very low. “Posing” appears as a chance to get something so these guys pose trying to win when they can’t win naturally (because in the end nobody wants to loose). They know that is just a half win but they feel better because they feel that they are making what they can/know.

    Real Alphas don’t like of course, it is extra competition (even if everybody knows it is not real competition) and as the top of hierarchy expands the rewards get divided with more people. In the end not everybody can be alpha or nobody will be alpha. By the other hand Betas don’t like because these “Posers” are eating specially from their market share and they hate it even more because they know they are just posers not real alphas. Like George says in th end, everybody knows that is fake, but I would say everybody knows that is fake but while some girls are in doubt they get some pussy that without posing they would never take. In the end Posing is not the best mindset but is still a winning mindset.

  36. In the end most PUA are Posers. As @George says if they were real alphas they would not care about manosphere at all. They didn’t grow as Alpha but they worked on themselves as much as they could/know trying to be Alpha. Hating Posers it’s easy but is not fair.

  37. “Growing from beta to a real alpha mentality”

    Mentality is not enough. It is necessary, but insufficient.

    Intangibles (thinking I’m the prize, abundance mentality, etc. is 1/2 of the equation)

    Real tangible characteristics Face>height>muscles are equally important.

    Things do NOT compensate

    You have to have both. There is no “climbing” the hierarchy without development in both areas.

  38. I don’t use the language, I don’t drink or smoke…

    But, again, that doesn’t mean I’m not open to learning from others that have mastery in certain areas – constant learning, constant improvement is an absolute imperative.

    Could CMQ have done the show with less ‘language’? Sure.

    Either way, that doesn’t mean I can’t learn something from him. I’ve linked in a prior comment to one of his books that’s full of valuable insights anyone can use in business.

    1. I knew going in what CMQ’s delivery would be like. I’m also familiar with the same style of delivery from the likes of Tom Leykis.

      I’m a guy like any other guy, I occasionally pepper in some choice words in my posts because that’s how Men talk. In fact I’m as suspicious of guys who front their pronouns or think Arthurian English emphasizes a point as men who swear overmuch.

      A concept like Alpha FUCKS and Beta Bucks needs that emphasis to make the point salient. I’ve learned this after dancing around with other euphemisms for it while attempting to make the next book more accessible to men unfamiliar with manosphere jingoism.

      That said, I get it. CMQ rubs guys the wrong way, but I would attribute that to his swagger and pretentiousness than his language.

      I had an invitation to go on this milquetoast, purple-pill, podcast:

      I turned it down because the guy is nowhere near as established as CMQ and he’s essentially trying to establish himself as the purple pill Dr. Phil.

      His delivery is calming, monotone and bland, like the ‘family therapist’ you talk to on a couch for $75 an hour. There is no challenge to anyone’s sensibilities and consequently he translates into a contrived sense compromise and “go along”.

      Furthermore the guy’s a phony – he had his girlfriend assistant email me some bullshit form email about having read my blog (since March) and hadn’t even read my book. At least CMQ and Dagonet have.

      So, which show should I go with? Foul-mouthed, cocky CMQ, or the measured purple pill marketeer ‘therapist’ guy at Shy Man’s “Dating School”?

  39. Fantastic to hear you Rollo! Much thanks. I’m midway through my fifth listening at the moment. And fwiw, no CMQ hate here (as found above), I rather like the guy, can appreciate his delivery and am mystified how anyone could be so easily throw off listening in the light of the content that was being delivered by you. So… boo-hoo to errbody harsh @ CMQ, they can go suck it! Haha.

  40. Shit, if we can’t handle a few four-letter words here and there then we’re no better than the hyper-intersectionalists and SJW’s who want “trigger warnings” to teach literature or concepts that might upset their feels (see Rutgers and the attempt to mandate an “opt-out” for those who can’t handle “The Great Gatsby” – not making that up).

    CMQ and his bud Dagonet are clearly Howard Stern disciples, but these days who isn’t. They did OK. I could never do what CMQ does (I have very little patience with Las Vegas-world) but I respect that he’s done it and making a living at it, and bravely put up his own soul-bearing story in a recent post. I would hope other men take as much reassurance and validation from those histories as I have gotten.

  41. You were an excellent guest and now I will read all of your work in your voice, much like I do with Morgan Freeman. I am catching up on RM and am in June 2013 of the archives and comments after a few months of dedicated reading.

    I think where men generally trip up on the red pill is that you have to understand and accept apparently contradictory concepts, prioritize them so that they work together, and then contextually dial them in to the optimal levels. That takes acknowledging and correcting internal binary thinking and dogma. You can’t live for yourself, if you’re incapable or unwilling to effectively think for yourself. Being able to think abstractly, accept that you have incomplete information, and avoid short term results-oriented thinking are the foundation that hold up the frame. If you’re fortunate enough to learn those skills through excellence in a highly competitive profession or endeavor. The field I have to credit the most for that toolbox is poker with the military being second. A game taught me Game. I noticed you deliberately posed in front of a poker table. It wasn’t until I accepted that ruthless pragmatism is the best counter to the harmful social conventions.

    Are greyhounds a panty dropper?

  42. …because that’s how Men talk.

    Well, perhaps I’m not a Man then. Not that it’s news to me; I’ve been told that many times, since at age two my father came home from the War and made it clear that I was worthless and never would amount to anything – a theme he kept up relentlessly for the next 15 years.

    I still don’t see the need of it. And the men I most admire don’t use such language. And I wouldn’t call these two guys Men, or even men – like all too many these days they’re more overgrown pubescent boys giggling and punching each other about how they’re getting away with being naughty. It’s a stage of human development (which females go through also, as we’re learning as feminism strips away the veils), but at more than twice that age they should have gotten over it long ago. If this is the Manhood to which the “Manosphere” aspires, then I’d say they deserve feminism. Somebody’s got to grow up; maybe the women are just trying to fill the role “men” have vacated. (Not that they’re doing any better, but Nature abhors a vacuum.)

    A concept like Alpha FUCKS and Beta Bucks needs that emphasis to make the point salient. I’ve learned this after dancing around with other euphemisms for it while attempting to make the next book more accessible to men unfamiliar with manosphere jingoism.

    Yes, there’s a use for the f-word there – both because it is a word for the subject actually under discussion and (interestingly) there isn’t a non-vulgar word that doesn’t sound stilted, and because the AF/BB concept is in itself a challenging shock to the delusions with which we’ve all been too long befogged. I confess I was somewhat uncomfortable quoting the term to a friend in need of some red pill awakening; but I think it might have gotten his attention when I did, as I’m not known for such language.

    I’m reminded of a quote from the Roman Cato the Elder which I’ve posted here and there. I don’t usually include the first part, because the rest is already strong enough; but here’s the whole thing:

    “Woman is a violent and uncontrolled animal, and it is useless to let go the reins and then expect her not to kick over the traces. You must keep her on a tight rein…. Women want total freedom, or rather – to call things by their names – total license. If you allow them to achieve complete equality with men, do you think they will be easier to live with? Not at all. Once they have achieved equality, they will be your masters.” – Cato the Elder, 234-149 BCE, quoted in Livy’s ‘History of Rome’ (xxxiv: 1,8)

    But using the f-word as a relentlessly repeated interjection or pseudo-adjective without any actual meaning used to modify every other word in a sentence is completely different. It’s not “cool” except to others of a similarly deficient intellectual capacity. It makes you sound like a “dumb f—“, to be precise.

    There’s a computer blogger I often read; aside from being a hopeless knee-jerk liberal, his comments on the computer world I find valuable. He also uses the f-word fairly liberally in his writing, and I have to wonder what sort of example he thinks he’s providing his wife and daughter. Is there a grown-up in the house?

    So, which show should I go with? Foul-mouthed, cocky CMQ, or the measured purple pill marketeer ‘therapist’ guy at Shy Man’s “Dating School”?

    Well, maybe you ought to give the other a try? It would certainly be different – and perhaps require different skills to get your message across – but could it be worse?

  43. ” . . . there’s a use for the f-word there . . .”

    As there is when discussing the word analytically. Say the word; for fuck’s sake.

  44. @Tilikum and @brutal truth

    “Brutal Truth”,,,,LOL

    Why are you attacking me personally, accusing me of lying and assuming conclusions about me? No one but me knows if I am writing truth. You have absolutely no way of confirming. And why does it matter to you?

    Why do you feel threatened?

    Obviously, what I wrote disturbs you deeply enough to provoke irrational emotional reactions from you. You attack me personally. You are not arguing against my perspective. You directly attack my character. Is this because you are frightened my experience is true and you cannot accept it?

    Does my post above threaten your little dreamy fantasy worlds?

  45. From the article Rollo linked to: “Swearing is positively correlated with extraversion and is a defining feature of a Type A personality.”

    Extraverts tend to enjoy human interactions and to be enthusiastic, talkative, assertive, and gregarious.

    Well, that explains it haha.

  46. Has anyone else seen this bat shit crazy story?


    The article mentions absolutely nothing realistic that obviously pertains to this like insanity, stupidity, narcissism, sloppy personal grooming……

    Gelder is not alone in the orchestration or presentation of this. Cosmo presents it as if it is almost normal, a viable alternative.

    Is this another way feminism is flipping the bird at men perhaps?

  47. @George

    You’re comparing CMQ’s alpha male behavior in upper end nightlife in Los Angeles with bars that Hell’s Angels frequent? I would LOVE to see a hardened ‘true’ alpha, like you described, try to pull decent looking girls at high end spots in L.A.

    It’s the entertainment capital of the world. Your “Alpha” experience foots with places like Reno Nevada, Denton Texas, and Springfield Missouri.

    You should check the context of where a person is coming from before calling out a poser. What works in one culture, might fail in another. Men calibrate to their surroundings. My behavior in L.A. would get me killed in my small hometown in Wisconsin.

    I’ve now lived in Southern CA for 12 years. Found myself in a Waffle House in Georgia last year calling the waiter a ‘dude’. Half the restaurant looked over at me like I was some sort of f@g.

    Context brother…

  48. @George

    There are more than 861 million websites. Alexa.com ranks the top websites according to popularity. It also ranks page views, bounce rate and daily time spent on the website.

    In 2014, http://www.cosmopolitan.co.uk has ranked in the top 6,000 of all websites (popularity) in the world. It’s the 730th most popular website in the UK.

    Alexa audience demographics show that an unusually high percentage of the women that read that magazine online have been to Graduate school.

    You’re blaming the CMQ show host for the issues in the world, then you point out a post in a well-funded magazine.

    What you point out is from a grander paradigm than any -ism.

    therationalmale.com rank:

    98,766 Global
    27,556 United States

    realchristianmcqueen.com rank:
    138,058 Global (recently ranked 109,976)
    61,929 United States

    You spent 1559 words attacking the host/interview, but only spent 73 words on the Cosmo UK article which has an audience that’s exponentially larger.

    Are you blaming Christian McQueen? Open your eyes. The Cosmo article has more influence. I introduced a few of the male nurse practitioners (in their 20s) to the CMQ podcast. They’ve not had the best male role models, and they’re not going to respect the boring, hokey hosts of most shows. They need masculine energy. I do not expect you or anyone else to understand a world where dubstep music videos earn more than 100 million views on youtube.


    When you point out these articles with a much larger audience than RM, it’s time to try to understand HOW to reach a much larger audience for whatever message you have to share. It’s low class to ask the question you did about Rollo’s family. There’s no place for that here or anywhere else.

    Has the CMQ show corrupted the male nurse practitioners? No. They’ve begun to dress more professionally because of the advice of Christian McQueen. They bought his books too. They’re clearly more confident now, and they’re focusing on starting side businesses because they’ve been introduced to CMQ and DangerandPlay. I couldn’t get them to read The Rational Male until after they enjoyed listening (and laughing through) a few episodes of the CMQ show including the one with Mike C. from DangerandPlay.com https://soundcloud.com/thechristianmcqueenshow/episode-5-steroids

    Though I live in “Hollywood” and have worked here for most of my career, I was reared in the country outside of a small town in the deep South. I hear what you’re saying, but most males did not have the role models we did.

    I haven’t met Christian McQueen or Dagonet in person, but Mike C from http://www.dangerandplay.com is a friend. He’s authentic. Everything he writes and speaks is authentically true. He’s completely congruent in person with what he writes and speaks. He, too, chose to be interviewed by the CMQ show. Why? Because he actually knows those guys. Mike doesn’t hang with posers.

    Posers act suddenly surprised at the existence of the most popular content on earth.

    The authentic work to change the course of global events.

  49. @George
    Your post is the one that drips with emotion, the desperate plea of a father scared his little girl will get railed by a douchebag.

    I have no daughter so I am far less emotionally invested in whether douchebags get laid or not.

    Your post implies that douchebags don’t get laid and instead spend their weekends getting beaten up by war vets and gangs of roving mexicans for their posing efforts.

    I’m going to level with you, George, and say that I think that could be a beautiful world to live in. But unfortunately your post is just a “feel-good” story for men. The reality is different.

    Jersey shore douchebags, hipsters, fake gangsters, heroin junkies, crappy musicians, these men are all having more success with young women (such as your daughter) than they “deserve” in your reckoning. Moreover they are not getting beat up on a regular basis for this.

    Meanwhile plenty of war vets, respectable men, successful and esteemed professionals, get scraps. (eg the deeply average old skank that General Petraeus ending up ruining his career over).

    It’s because all that matters is how the man makes women feel. It’s not necessary (or sufficient) for him to have great “masculine virtues”. Even if this reality makes us uncomfortable, as men it’s our prerogative to be pragmatic and see things for what they are.

  50. Despite the barrage of different opinions on this post, a couple things remain true:

    1. This is our highest rated podcast yet, so more people have been exposed to the Red Pill and for that I’m grateful. If just 1 man has his eyes opened and his life is changed for the better than Rollo, Dagonet and I have done a solid job.

    2. The LA Kings lost tonight in the season home opener and for that I’m pissed.

    That is all.

  51. re: No True Extravert …

    Us real extraverts have too much to say to bother with swearing. Think Steve Urkel on extra caffeine. Lounging around using cuss words is phyiscally and intellectually lazy. Bad words are merely for irrational purposes and emotional contexts, and bad contexts at that.

  52. Hi Rollo,

    I really enjoyed your interview. (And don’t fret over how your own voice sounds to you. I experience the same surprise at my voice and it doesn’t get in my way of living a full life.)

    On the subject of hobbies (a topic you addressed late in your interview) and how to make that work for you I have to relate that dancing has been one that for me has been the best place to find women. First let me say that just because a woman likes to dance it’s no guarantee that she is not difficult (crazy!) But allowing for selection and such there is much to be said for having a rhythmic experience with a member of the opposite sex.

    Here’s the point I wanted to make: While I came to the dance floor because I wanted to meet women who shared my enjoyment of music it has grown to be much more than that. At some point being an accomplished dancer (I’m talking social dance here, not stage performance) takes on a life of it’s own. At that point the pursuit of being a better dancer (in whatever style) becomes a passion that then becomes even more attractive to women.

    So here I am, for sure way way older than most of you guys and having a fun time as a single male. Let me be blunt about this. When you are in your 60s you can’t expect some young hottie to crave your wrinkled old body (Face it guys, it’s coming to you too). But I’m still pulling in the very top of the pool of available women. What they lack in youthful firmness is more than made up for in enthusiasm and skills.

    In some ways it’s easier since many of these women are ones who played the hypergamy card and were left alone and on the other side of the wall.

    What I’m offering here is some perspective from an older viewpoint which you will all get to at some point (unless you are shot in the back by a jealous husband as you try to slip out the bedroom window).

    So just a word of advice from my view here on the high point of age: If you want to meet women who will be very interested in you and what you do pursue a hobby that fits the demographic. For me: Dance. But you know, as an alternative, there is a huge world of artists out there. Painting workshops are full of potential. Mostly full of women. (If you are already a painter, give the workshops. There are other rewards besides the $). Further ideas: Hiking clubs, Environmental groups, gun and target shooters (yikes!) and more.

    Beyond that I leave it to your imagination. Play with what interests you. Get involved on a bigger level than just your own little home-basement-workshop world. Everything that interests you interests a multitude and you will be amazed at how much there is to connect with in whatever you find interesting.

    This all cycles back to what Rollo said in the beginning; Improve yourself. Quite simple. Improve yourself and in the process you will be totally surprised at what will come into your life.


  53. phonemail interview red pill has changed my outlook on the world. I understand that the female hyper-gamey will automatically reject what is being said and classify it as misogyny. Being knew to red-pill awareness and maybe its my inner white knight but listing to people in the manosphere seem to be very emotional and not rational towards females. So what the world and your family lied to keep you ignorant from game. Hopefully your able to realize from trial and error and embrace how females are hard-wired and f*** their brains out so a man can be the man and the women can be the women. At times I see a lot of cloudy emotional BS in the maonaphere clouding how simple it could be.

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