I slipped outta there around 11:30 and ventured over to one of Fairbanks’ many dive bars. The cigarette smoke forced me out after only 30 minutes with no approaches made. The sex ratio was horrendous.

I then hopped to my favorite dive across town to sample the live music. I saw one girl I had approached back in the summer and got nowhere with, and essentially ignored her despite the fact that she was playing the fiddle in the bluegrass band on stage, and was definitely the most attractive girl at the venue, which for Fairbanks isn’t saying much. The women here are, in general, rough around the edges. The university ups the percentage of women during the winter months, but barely nudges their level of attractiveness. Even a 6 is a rare commodity. Most of these girls are what you might call “earthy”. If you’re OK with out-of-date fashion or hygiene not being in ship shape, Fairbanks is your prowling ground….but you will have competition.

My next dive was quite possibly the most adventurous, due to the fact that it’s frequented by Alaska Natives (who, as they saying goes, take their firewater seriously). Native girls are a crap shoot in that it’s easy to weed out the physically repulsive ones (9 girls out of 10) but even the appealing ones with proper dimensions can hide a level of psychological dysfunction so profound you will question yourself later if you managed to get the bang. Their culture is far different from white culture, yet they’ve adopted some of the worst parts of its contemporary madness (i.e. selfies and smartphone addiction). Athabascan women can be very direct and dominant, to the point where it seems like all they’re looking for is a passive man who will sit at home, collect unemployment, get drunk, and knock her up with a welfare kiddie when she’s in the mood. Such is life when your culture is being systematically eradicated. 100 years ago their ancestors were mostly self-sufficient by subsisting off what was available in nature. Their traditions have been reduced to a novelty, only truly practiced by the financially well-off, which is ironic because a subsistence lifestyle used to be a way to live well without money.

The girls at this bar were not worth the hassle, so I switched gears and walked across the street to one of the city’s two night clubs. A $10 cover and a quick frisk by the bouncer got me into this club frequented mostly by military chaps from Ft. Wainwright, a demographic which yours truly in no way falls into. As a result, a rather diverse mix of white, black and Hispanic mingled around. The few GNO ladies did not meet my physical threshold, so they were not approached. The best interaction I had there was a 30-second bit with one of the pour girls, who looked a bit like Heather Graham. She cutely complained how some “assholes” had stolen her water pitcher. I spit some less than stellar game at her, which see seemed receptive to, indicating the competency level of the men in the crowd. I even snuck in some kino by grasping her fingers as I slowly took my water cup from her, to which she did not recoil and maintained eye contact. Had I been in the mood to wait things out, she was the most worthwhile prospect of the evening. Honestly, I got more of a kick out of watching the other dudes and their interactions with women, or lack thereof. The couples out for V-Day ranged from alphas to omegas. I gagged a bit when I saw one guy literally clinging to a hideous beast. He wasn’t much to begin with in terms of looks/physique, but she was easily 3 points LOWER than he was. One of the few instances of ONEitis gleaned from the field. Another skinny introvert made the mistake of sitting down at a table already occupied by some bigger girls who were at the bar getting refills. When one came back, she threw out a real cheap shot of a shit test calling him out for stealing her seat. The guy revealed his beta placement through body language alone in the defensive crouch. Clearly uninterested, the girl laughed and said she was joking, and that he could stay there.

After missing the raffle ticket number for a trip to Vegas by the last digit, I called it a night rather early, around 2:30. The combination of the cold and the comparatively few single women at any venue, regardless of their ability to arouse, did me in. That said, I took one positive note of reflection:

On V-Day, if you go out solo, chat with the female bartenders. They’re going to be envious at best, or bitchy at worst depending on their level of hate for the holiday, but when the pickings are slim they offer a viable option you might not consider on your regular nights out.

And there we have it. Keep on having fun.

Just before the movie started I stood up in the theatre, had my baby in my arm, turned around to face the packed theatre (80% women) and said with a big grin something along the lines of:
“Listen Up Ladies, you do realize this is JUST a movie, Christian Grey doesn’t exist, go easy on us men, we try our best!”

I got a standing ovation! haha (well they were clapping, but no standing)

Here was my take on the movie, and boy it was so cheesy and predictable!
I liked the scene where she was out with her friends drinking and they cut to Mr Grey and he is sitting diligently on his laptop with a glass of wine. A man on a mission! Getting his stuff done
The scene where her male “friend” confesses his feelings for her while drunk and tries to kiss her. Mr Grey swooping in to save the day ! (so predictable and cheesy)
Then the scene where she stayed with him the first time and she awoke and he wasn’t there. They cut to a shot of him out running, again a man that has a mission to stay fit and not let anything get in the way of that.
Then on the date when the doors open up to the roof top, music booming and a helicopter right there ! What over the top crap ! But the movie wouldn’t sell if it was his 1996 Ford Explorer waiting !
The scene where he takes her up in a glider as well and her reactions and joy ! As a pilot I enjoyed the Mr Grey flew his own aircraft!
I told the misses that I get the same reaction when I take people flying in my little ultralight:

In the end, she walked out on him, and he chased her, and I laughed at how the movie started with him being in control, to him chasing like a chihuahua!
And that contract of his, he keeps bugging her about signing his contract, and he starts looking desperate, even I was thinking “dude you look like a loser” !
My misses said in the other books he starts looking pathetic confessing his undying love for her. He is much more alluring when he is in control of his emotions.

I actually had fun in the end, never would have chosen a movie like that. Probably like 90% of the men in the movie theatre that day. The bondage stuff didn’t seem all that hardcore, my understanding is they toned it down from the book a bit.

No woman is perfect. Any relationship with one is ‘settling’. The best you can do is to choose the trade offs that are acceptable to you at the time.

Only if you LTR your catch.

And so I missed the single best pick-up night of possibly a lifetime.

I did end up with her in my hotel room making out, no sex though as despite of all my efforts and push-pulls she just kept saying it was “too soon”.

I do hope she ends up being worth it (fortunately seems like it so far).