One of the cornerstones of red pill truth is in men coming to terms with what amounts to (in most cases) half a lifetime of feminine conditioning. It’s interesting to consider that there was a time (pre-sexual revolution) when a man wasn’t in someway socialized and acculturated in his upbringing to give deference to the feminine or to become more feminine-identifying. There are plenty of other manosphere bloggers who’ll run down in detail all of the many ways boys are now raised and educated to be what a feminine-primary world would like them to be, but at the heart of it is a presumption that boys should be raised and conditioned to be more like girls; conditioned from their earliest memories to be better providers for what women believe they will eventually want them to be as adult ‘men’.
For men who’ve become aware of this conditioning through some trauma or personal crisis that prompted him to seek answers for his condition, we call this period our blue pill days. I think it’s important to make a distinction about this time – whether or not a man is Alpha or Beta doesn’t necessarily exclude him from the consequences of a blue pill conditioning. That isn’t to say that a more natural Alpha Man can’t see the world in a red pill perspective by his own means, but rather that his feminine-primary upbringing doesn’t necessarily make a man Alpha or Beta.
The Blue Pill Alpha
I’m making this distinction because there is school of thought that being blue pill (unaware of one’s conditioning) necessitates him being more Beta. To be sure, feminine-primary conditioning would raise a boy into a more feminine-pliable man – ready to serve as the good Beta provider when a woman’s SMV declines and she’s less able to compete with her younger sexual competitors.
However, there exist more Alpha Men also conditioned to be servants of the Feminine Imperative. These men make for some of the most self-evincing White Knights you’ll ever meet and are usually the first men to “defend the honor” of the feminine and women for whom they lack a real awareness of. Binary absolutism and an upbringing steeped in feminization makes for a potent sense of self-righteousness. Blue pill Alphas live for the opportunity to defend everything their conditioning has taught them. To the blue pill Alpha all women are victims by default, all women share a common historic suffrage and any man (his sexual competitors) critical of the feminine are simply an opportunity to prove his worth to any woman in earshot who might at all find his zealousness attractive.
The Second Set of Books
On June 15th, 2011, Thomas Ball set himself on fire in front of Cheshire Superior Court in New Hampshire. While I strongly disagree with his decision to self-immolate, I understand his sentiment. In last week’s Possession, Living Tree attempted to call me to the carpet about how a man might come to the conclusion of suicide or murder once he’d become confronted with a total loss of all his personal and emotional investment in life:
But Rollo, you just justified murder as “logical”, by illustrating that insecurity is the prime motivator for this man’s life (and many others, I’d imagine). The decision may have be understandable in an empathetic sense, and he might have seen it as logical at the time, but there is nothing logical about it. You are making extreme beta-ism seem more and more like a mental disorder.
Just for the record, I’d argue that ONEitis, however extreme, is in fact a mental disorder.
I haven’t justified anything, murder or suicide, I’ve simply outlined the deductive process men use when confronting the actualized loss of their most important investment (or perceptually so) in life. They are convinced and conditioned to believe that women are playing by a set of rules and will honor the terms of those rules, only to find that after ego-investing themselves for a lifetime in the correctness and appropriateness of those rules does he discover in cruel and harsh terms that women are playing by another set of rules and wonder at how stupid he could be to have ever believed in the rules he was conditioned to expect everyone would abide by.
Suicide or murder is certainly a deductive and pragmatic end for some men, but by no means is it justified. Thomas Ball, for all of his due diligence in uncovering the ugly processes of the American divorce industry, was far more useful alive than dead in some symbolic suicide. He wasn’t the martyr he probably expected he’d be, he’s just a footnote.
For all of that, Thomas Ball and his last message to humanity serves as an excellent illustration of a man coming to terms with his own conditioning. In his message Ball makes a very important observation about his legal ordeals. He comes to understand that there are two sets of books rather than the one he’d been lead to believe that everyone understood as ‘the rules’ everyone should play by.
The confusion you have with them is you both are using different sets of books. You are using the old First Set of Books- the Constitution, the general laws or statutes and the court ruling sometime call Common Law. They are using the newer Second Set of Books. That is the collection of the policy, procedures and protocols. Once you know what set of books everyone is using, then everything they do looks logical and upright.
Ball was of course making a political statement in his account of going through the legal system and the cruel education he got in the process, but when men transition from their comfortable blue pill perspective into the harsh reality that the red pill represents, the experience is a lot like Ball discovering that the set of books (the set of rules) he’d believed everyone was using wasn’t so. Likewise, men who’ve been conditioned since birth to believe that women were using a common set of rules – a set where certain expectations and mutual exchange were understood – were in fact using their own set. Furthermore these men ‘just didn’t get it’ that they should’ve known all along that women, as well as men’s feminization conditioning, were founded in a second set of books.
In and of itself, this is a difficult lesson for young men to learn and disabuse themselves of before they’ve invested their most productive years into what their blue pill conditioning has convinced them they can expect from life and women. However, when a mature man, who’s based the better part of his life and invested his future into the hope that the first set of books is actually legitimate set is disenfranchised by the second set of books, by the actual set of rules he’s been playing with, that’s when all of the equity he believed he’d established under the first set of books counts for nothing. Literally his life (up to that point) counted for nothing.
When faced with the prospect of rebuilding himself after living so long under false pretenses, after having all he believed he was building turn up to be a lifetime of wasted effort, he’s faced with two real options. Recreate himself or destroy himself. Needless to say suicide statistics among men are a strong indication that the majority of men (Betas) simply don’t have the personal strength to recreate themselves. Thomas Ball didn’t.
There’s usually a lot of disillusionment that comes with making the transition to Red Pill awareness. I’ve written more than a few posts about the stages of grief and acceptance that come along with that transition. Guy’s get upset that what they now see was really there all along, but it’s not so much the harshness of seeing red pill dynamics in women or a feminized society play out with such predictability, it’s the loss of investment that cause the real sense of nihilism. When I wrote Anger Management, the overarching reason most men experienced what they called a righteous anger, wasn’t at how the second set of books had been dictating their lives for so long, but rather it was anger at having invested so much of themselves in the first set of books and losing that very long term investment.
The good news is you can rebuild yourself. A lot gets written about how nihilistic the red pill is, but this is for a lack of understanding that you can recreate yourself for the positive with the knowledge of both sets of rules. One common thread I see come up often on the Red Pill Reddit forum is how Game-awareness has completely destroyed a guy’s world view. I get it, I realize it’s a hard realization, but their depression is only for a lack of realizing that they can become even better in this new understanding than they were in their blue pill ignorance.
February 2nd, 2014 at 1:38 pm
I’ve attempted to read most of the comments in this blog from a female perspective. That men, en-mass, might discover that there are and always were two sets of books, cannot be of great comfort to women. I suspect that many women will engage in a good cop/bad cop mentality in an attempt to dismiss men who engage in any form of two-book enlightenment. “You’re only upset now because you didn’t figure it out sooner, fool! Admit it!” There are obvious examples of this heretofore.
February 2nd, 2014 at 1:51 pm
“@livingtree: What we see here are people in one phase and stage. There is a seemingly endless influx of them. But what we don’t see is what happens when people stop reading and posting or commenting. What isn’t apparent is that people do move out of this phase. But they surely do, and new members of the stasis arrive to replace them. So, as a reader of all of these comments, it is best to keep in mind that most of these people will not feel like this forever. They will flow out on paths they never report, and so it will SEEM as if there is never any growth or change. But there is.
“The only way around is through.” – Robert Frost”
Awesome perspective, Kate.
February 2nd, 2014 at 2:04 pm
Hey – does anyone else think this blog accurately depicts the underlying message in the movie “Life of Pi”? You know – everyone gets in a life boat with very little food and rescue is far off?
February 2nd, 2014 at 2:23 pm
“Or were those concepts related to the realities of human life?”
Those concepts were related to the realities of human life. Still doesn’t absolve women of the sheite they’ve pulled. The women of today are mostly narcissistic sociopaths. That experienced, wise men are spreading that truth is positive.
February 2nd, 2014 at 2:30 pm
“…So finally when man finally has enough, kills hypergamous wife, society has no reason to be angry.
It’s all so simple.”
Now that, my friends, is rational thought! If you don’t believe me, the just ask Julia Merfeld! What a wonderful world!
February 2nd, 2014 at 2:42 pm
Behold Julia – the epitome of modern femininity. LT and Kate – do all women suck in the same manner as Julia? Deep, deep down, do all women hold that men are disposable in this manner? Be honest, beeotches. Don’t give me the good cop/bad cop routine. Do most women take advantage of men for materialistic gain or not?
February 2nd, 2014 at 3:04 pm
So very apropos, is it not? Male disposability is not a woman’s problem. Why? Because the majority of women today are narcissistic sociopaths. Just ask any narcissistic sociopath how they feel about their victims. They’ll tell you that they feel nothing but contempt for their targets.
February 2nd, 2014 at 3:21 pm
Kate/LT – in case you haven’t noticed, I loath both of you. Your efforts to obscure the vast, selfless contributions of men towards women and family will be held to account. You can lie to us, but you cannot lie to yourselves. Within each crime against humanity is eventual, self-annihilation.
February 2nd, 2014 at 3:45 pm
BTW, much of what I’ve read in this blog amounts to verbal foreplay. Kate/DT, you know what I’m talking about.
February 2nd, 2014 at 6:17 pm
The benefits and sacrifice for both women and men, whether through front line death in battle or behind the line sacrifices for children, women, the wounded and the elderly is that it furthers the cause of freedom and independence for all. It is only through our constitutional republic and a fair view of the differences between men and women that these dreams become reality. Tear that down and you have nothing on which to place the feet of previous good will. Tear that down and you return to a world of fascism and institutionalized human injustice.
March 22nd, 2014 at 10:21 am
Hi fellas,
I’m new to the blog and the manosphere in general, I’d like to divulge my story of enlightenment and emancipation with you.
I’m from the UK and was popular in school at a young age. However aged around 9 I began suffering from severe obsessive thoughts and ruminations, progressing to delusions and loss of reality, eventually resulting in hospitalization.
This illness dogged me throughout my teens, but with therapy over many years and numerous types of medication I began to gain some control of my condition.
Obviously this type of experience causes both internal and external changes within oneself. I was throughout my teens and early twenties socially outcast, awkward and shy. I had low self esteem, couldn’t trust my own judgement and felt pretty worthless. Ambition was pretty limited, as I was happy if wasn’t driving my self insane with some crazy delusion.
I had no interaction with women during this period. I felt invisible. I was the crazy kid that they avoided.
Mid twenties, New medication, feel great. Begin to develop self esteem. I realise I’m a good looking guy, 6’3″, lean and muscular without having to kick the arse out of the gym. I’d learned to embrace my different way of seeing things, it made me creative, I started painting, playing guitar, piano, drums. I’d had a couple of short relationships, with some hot girls, but nothing that lasted or fulfilled me.
Aged 24 I met my future wife, she was a bit older than me, intelligent, petit, Italian ancestry and beautiful, she also earned more than me and had her own property. We were great together, travelled, backpacked, lived life etc. 2 years later we were married.
Early In the relationship she asked me how many people I had slept with, I told her 5. I asked her and she swerved the question, I didn’t think about it at the time as I had been blinded by ‘love’ and thought that in this day and age it shouldn’t matter, what happens in the present is more important.
One night we had some friends over for dinner, and sexual pasts were mentioned in passing. Later that night when we were alone I asked her outright how many people she had slept with. She told me she would tell me the truth as she felt she had nothing to be ashamed about. The answer was 30.
I felt shit about this. I thought about it regularly. My opinion and view of her changed, thus so did my behavior and attitude. I tried to come to terms with this information, using all the usual blue pill bollocks I had had force fed me my entire life. But, eventually I gave up. I couldn’t make myself happy with the situation. And so I made a decision to end the relationship. I had come to the conclusion that my feelings were real and I was entitled to have them. I knew I wouldn’t be happy with her again, and I’d had enough experience being unhappy in my life.
I told her I was leaving, she was distraught, begged, apologized etc. She told me none of her other boyfriends had cared about her number, this I found ironic, and told her how it was funny that out of all the men, the only one she wanted to live her life with, fucking did care, and I couldn’t care less what the other men thought.
Anyway, now I was single, came across red pill game by accident and embraced it wholeheartedly. I’m so happy now, I make a living from my paintings, do what I want when I want. Have regular one night stands and pretty much live my perfect life. I honestly can’t see me ever getting married again. Ever.
I know it might seem terribly harsh, she is a good person and made a good wife. But it was something that I couldn’t stand so I walked.
May 18th, 2014 at 4:35 pm
[…] become it and solve the problem – in order to achieve a woman’s intimacy comes from an old set of books that no woman is still using. However the reliance on the responsibilities outlined in that first […]
May 27th, 2014 at 12:57 am
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June 24th, 2014 at 3:45 pm
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November 4th, 2014 at 11:55 pm
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December 26th, 2014 at 3:00 pm
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January 12th, 2015 at 3:33 pm
I’ve actually had female friends confide in me that when looking at a man for marriage that “looks don’t matter.” Bullshit. I’m not sure if they were outliers or not. Of course looks can matter, they signal genetic fitness, but its not the only thing that women find arousing in a man.
If a guy, presumably a beta male, marries one of these women who is not really attracted to him physically/sexually, but just for his provider role or status, I think this is extremely dangerous for the guy – a future horrific divorce or miserable, sexless marriage awaits him. What happens in the future if his career does not work out and he can’t buy the mcmansion and lifestyle she wants? Most men don’t realize how many women marry men that they really aren’t physically attracted to. Women make compromises that men won’t in a spouse. Most normal men would not marry a women that they don’t have any physical chemistry with. I believe that men are sexually attracted to a broader spectrum of physical appearance in women, whereas women I believe only really get sexually aroused by men in the top 5% (such as being tall, developed physique).
Most men believe that if they just do good career-wise, that will be enough to get an attractive woman to love them. Maybe so, but it doesn’t mean that she will be physically attracted to him, but just tolerable to her.
Esther Vilar in the book “The Manipulated Man” stated that women will indeed marry man merely because he is rich. Marriage can be essentially prostitution. If he loses his job, status and wealth, he loses her. Most men do not comprehend how alien and immensely different that women see the world and view men.
January 27th, 2015 at 3:09 pm
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